I did some analysis on global mean temperature vs. the number of pirates and have come to a startling conclusion: Pastafarianism will bring the next ice age!
As demonstrated in the attached graph, by extrapolating the data we find that only 135752 pirates would be required to bring about the next ice age. This number of converts is well within reach! We’re doomed!
-Travis
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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I don’t understand!
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W007! 2nd!
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That’s still a whole lot of pirates though. Do we have that many?
In any case, the ice age wasn’t all bad. Mamoth roasts, penguin sledding, great ice castles to be defended at all costs….. and we’ll still have rum. It might be synthetic rum, but pirates will still have a place in this new era.
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The FSM created all of the global warming because he was upset with us for not becoming pirates, so I think the more Pastafarians we can create, the better. I think at one point we will have perfect weather, but less and less natural disasters like tornados, hurricanes, tsunamis, ect.
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@L’tuae
You’re completely right, I don’t see why people are so afraid of a new Ice Age, I’m mean we’re all going to die December 2012 when a comet hits the earth, so I say let’s go down partying!
RAmen
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so, too many and we freeze, too much and the icecaps melt, whats this magic number?
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@Pope Pixel I
I was told the nano-sized robots will kill us at 2016?
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Pixel! I read that the comet/asteriod thing wasn’t going to hit, was going to miss by a few thousand miles. Like teens of thousands. Correct me if I’m wrong? Are we talking about the same one?
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@Cap’n (not) Sophisticated
Oh yes, if you’ve been told about some form of armageddon, then it’s going to happen. There’s about 500 things that will “happen” between now and 2100 that’ll destroy the earth, that’s how doomed we are.
@L’Tuae
I don’t know, but the 2012 comet o’ doom is my favorite of all the theories, so I pretty much stick with the fact that we’re totally screwed.
.
RAmen
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End of the World: 9:27 AM, December 25, 2012
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@Pixel- may I see a link for the comet-o-doom? I like to be up to date on all conspiracies and apocalypse theories.
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Hey!!, just did a search- that Dec 22 2012 thing is based off the ancient Mayan calender. Why’d they do that? Maybe they have a thing against twos.
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The fact that the Mayans predicted that concerns me. Those people were truly brilliant. Wacko, but brilliant.
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Oh, I got the day wrong. I could’ve sworn it was the 25th.
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this graph is off on the fact that:
1. pirates came after the ice age when it started to warm up
2.there are at least a thousand pirates out there. For example there are actors who play as pirates (ex. jonny depp as jack sparrow) and there are pastafarians who, basically, are pirates at heart.srry to bust the bubble but that’s off.
RAmen
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The only reason the Mayans were wacko is because they were not pirates! They should have taken the Spanish ships and terrorized the sea.
It is Friday.
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25th, 22nd, it’s only three days dif. Not that much. Then again, you could have fit a lot of partying into that time period.
It would be kind of sucky if it was on the 25th though.
“Look kids, Santa was here!” (looks out window, sees flaming torture and nasty crap)
“Aaaaahhhhh!!!!”
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goos FSM, i hope not! (i don’t say good lord anymore) that would suck. right as i’m opening a laptop i see all the trees on fire and everything’s burning. i be “Damn! now i die and i don’t get to try this out!!!” that would be torture to me.
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@ OEW – Ya, too bad about the smallpox thing. Of course, then the world would be ruled by people who believe in human sacrifice…
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Everyone, today is a friday, the holy day of FSM. everybody who came on this site wearing anyform of pirate regalia, (even if it was just an eyepatch or pirate hat) FSM is happy for you.
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It’s raining too much to wear my pirate wench bikini today… :(((
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I’m wearing my sword. XD
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not raining here. even though we need it. I think fredricksburg hasn’t gotton water latly is because i am the only pastafarian/pirate for miles. but this is really wierd and i’m not lying. yesterday was 95 degrees and tomarrow is supposed to be 89. today, on a friday, the high was 76. how wierd is that? me think it’s evedence.
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@ Aris – swords are sexy!
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@ Gaara – We’ve had a drought in Oklahoma for years…till this year. We have a weather station at my house and since mid March we have gotten 34.91 inches of rain. Too much of a good thing is still too much!
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im wearing my jolly roger bandana to cover my horrible haircut hehheh
i like the cold bring on the ice age, and if we all die in 2012 ill die partying with a sword in one hand and rum in the other, but that wont happen because Nostradamus predicted earth would last until 3797 when we blew it up
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Perhaps we’re a bit off. Didn’t the world end in ‘99?
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Rowdiest Wench Jun 29th, 2007 at 9:48 am
“@ Aris – swords are sexy!”
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Swords are Hawt!
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The end is near my rear.
Repant!!!
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Why do you say repant, Paris? Don’t you mean unpant?
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@ Aris – oops, ya, my bad! Swords are Hawt! :))
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Paris doesn’t wear pants…or underpants from what I understand!
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A little late, but… congratulations, Jesuslovesme, on acquiring the initial response on this thread, which awards you the gold medal for your home country!
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And congratulations, Dread Wench L’TUAE, on getting the silver and bronze!
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You guys have all got it wrong. The FSM is going to deflect the 2012 comet with His noodly appendages. It’s been proven without a doubt. So there’s no worries; however, we can still pretend and have a HUGE party!
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So, wait… I’m well aware that due to the influx of Pirates, the temperature will fall… But… Once the ice ace hits, does that mean that Pirates will no longer be able to use Pirateships, but they’ll have to upscale to Icebreakers?
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Hey, I’m wearing my Pirate Republic T Shirt, it says “the beatings will continue until morale improves under a great big jolly roger. That has to count for something.
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Hawt! Hawt! Hawt!
Pants! Pants! Pants!
Panties! Panties! Panties!
Underwear! Underwear! Underwear!
No underwear! No underwear! No underwear!
Chocolate! Chocolate! Chocolate!
Candies! Candies! Candies!
Paris! Paris! Paris!
Hawt! Hawt! Hawt!
.
>:0===Q<
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(a little late?)
forget the sword. i got a cutlass. (unforcentaly i can’t wear it or put it in my room. My mom locked it up in the attic until i’m 14. I CAN”T WAIT HALF A YEAR!!!!
**p.s i decided to change from garra to this. garra isn’t even my name.**
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Okay, now RW is messing with me….j/k.
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North Texas, here. Lots of rain for us, too.
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RAmen
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Wench Beth Jun 29th, 2007 at 10:23 am
“You guys have all got it wrong. The FSM is going to deflect the 2012 comet with His noodly appendages. It’s been proven without a doubt. So there’s no worries; however, we can still pretend and have a HUGE party!”
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We could have one RIGHT NOW!
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a wedding? i love weddings! Drinks all around! – Jack Sparrow POTC
who’s bringing the rum? i’m broke.
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Hello, BCA!! You and Rowdiest are very welcome to send your rain north and south, respectively. Poor New Mexico needs a bit!
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Swords are Hawt and smexy. So are cutlasses. And rapiers. And cannons.
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To Aristotle… yes, being that it’s Friday, and also being that there’s no excuse needed, let’s have the party RIGHT NOW! I’ll start baking cookies!
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poor VA as well. it’s all because of the fact that none of my parents, relitives, friends, nodody, is a pastafarian here in fredricksburg. ):
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Lord of the Pirate Fish Jun 29th, 2007 at 10:29 am
“a wedding? i love weddings! Drinks all around! – Jack Sparrow POTC
who’s bringing the rum? i’m broke.”
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I just that movie last night with my aunt! It was her first time seeing it. I love Pirates of the Carribean.
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@Wench Beth – Mmm…cookies. :))
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Me, too! Those movies are the greatest! Except I cried for a half hour at the end of “Pirates 3″. I’m such a wimp.
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same here. i’ve seen the third one. it’s a bit more grim and alot of people imporatant to the movie get killed.
OKAY A SPOILER IS BEYOND THIS POINT!!!!!!!! DON”T CONTINUE IF YOU HAVEN”T SEEN IT YET OR WANT TO KNOW WHO DIES!!!!!
Here’s who dies (last chance!!)…………………………………………………….Davy Jones……………..James Norrington………………………………….Will (big surpirise there. never saw it coming)…………………….elizebeth’s father.
And here’s a shock. we finally see Jack’s dad!!!! (and his mum’s head **shivers**)
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Pie is needed as well. Pumkin pie. Or lemon meringue. Apple is yummy.
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mmmmm…GOSH now i’m starving and i can’t leave the computer to go get something to eat! good thing i carry my pirate flask full of coca-cola around. ( it’s metal and has the jolly roger on it. got it for 15 bucks.) WHAT!!!! damn, it’s empty.
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