I heard some ID believer say that “the probability that humans have emerged from natural selection is the same as the probability that a monkey composes ‘Hamlet’ by randomly typing on a keyboard”.
Well, I happen to have a monkey (Sheila) that likes to type at random on a keyboard. And today she typed this (see the attached picture).
Evidence!
Giovanni
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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@Paris – Speaking as a pastafarin, I do not care what you believe. If you want to be part of a negative religion, go for it.
I will gladly engage in thoughtful banter about almost any topic, but I will not try to “convert” you. Or does pointing out conflicts in doctrine constitute an effort to convert?
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“Cap’n Caroline the Two-Legged Jun 28th, 2007 at 9:14 am
@Paris Hilton: What’s so threatening about you getting ‘Hawt’?”
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Nothing really, I already am Hawt.
Probably best if I don’t get any Hawter though…
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If Paris gets Hawt, she will asplode.
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Hawter*
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“One-eyed Wonderkin Jun 28th, 2007 at 9:20 am
@Paris – Speaking as a pastafarin, I do not care what you believe. If you want to be part of a negative religion, go for it.
I will gladly engage in thoughtful banter about almost any topic, but I will not try to “convert” you. Or does pointing out conflicts in doctrine constitute an effort to convert?”
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Pointing out differences is what makes the world go around.
Trying to tell someone what you believe is right, and what they believe is wrong.
Is being a Fundamentalist for what you believe.
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History has shown, I’ve been a Pastafarian for awhile now.
The true Pastafarian knows that FSM was created to fight Fundies,
not to infringe on other faiths.
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To Paris Hilton… even though you are HAWT, you are wrong about all Fundies being the same. We Pastafarians go by the FSM’s teachings, which are (in my words) “If you want to believe in me, cool, and if you don’t want to believe in me, that’s cool, too.” Have you read the Gospel? Pastafarians don’t force their beliefs on anyone! That is very different from the Christian fundamentalists’ M.O.
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So I think you better just go back to jail for insulting us. You can be HAWT there again.
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Artie, Best not find out.:) I’m sooo Hawt!
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Sorry Beth, I think you lost your Pastafarian way.
A fudie is a fundie, and your last comment contradicts itself.
Sorry,
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Why are you sorry, oh hawt one? You’re the one going back to jail!! Hee hee!!
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Actually I agree with you there Paris of the FSM. According to Richard Dawkins, religion is some kind of warped left over that evolution still hasn’t had a chance to get rid of. He attributes it to the same kind of process that goes on with moths when they fly into a flame. They haven’t evolved enough to be able to distinguish between light that will guide them home, to light that will fry them. So the instinct is still there, but it is very dangerous to them if they get tangled with the wrong kind of light. Religion in people is sort of like a left over vestige of something that had helped mankind survive a million years ago. So we have advanced technologically but evolution is slow. So people have a tendency to get all fundemental about shite when it is near and dear to them.
Can you say that there are a bunch of fundies on this site…probably not. But we may want to ask that question again in a few years if the evening News is all about hordes of swaggering, cutlass swinging Pirates, giving the local population the choice to either convert to the Pastafarian Way or walking the plank.
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“Iron Bess Jun 28th, 2007 at 9:48 am
Can you say that there are a bunch of fundies on this site…probably not. But we may want to ask that question again in a few years if the evening News is all about hordes of swaggering, cutlass swinging Pirates, giving the local population the choice to either convert to the Pastafarian Way or walking the plank.”
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Actually, as long as I’ve been here, I can say yes.
There are some who take this too far already, not many but some.
I tend to believe in the core values that made the FSM.
i.e. FSM vs Kansas, in that one is no better then the other.
Some seem to lose track of that, sad really.
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Another readable book…which IMHO…should be on the ‘Must Read’ material for all school children, all over the world, is The Demon Haunted World by Carl Sagan. Who, by the way, should be considered an Honorary Pirate and Pastafarian of the Pope-ish rank. Mankind, which includes us poor misunderstood Pastafarian types, will soon become extinct if we don’t start training ourseles and our children to get our collective heads out of our asses and stop with the believing in fairy tales, witches, wizards, goblins, god(s), crystals, info-mercials, tarot cards, horoscopes, Tom Cruise’s sanity etc.
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Huummm… A SPIDER MONKEY? Something smells fishie around here… huummmm
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“Mike Honcho Jun 28th, 2007 at 10:05 am
Obviously we are the one true religion. “.
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Those are the words of a fundie, not Hawt!
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Paris – I have agree with you about some having gone too far.
But that is the same with every group. There are tons of examples, just look at the soccer matches for one. Humans are social or group animals. Groups mean outsiders. Some groups are easy to get into, some are hard. Some try to convert you, some ignore you, and some with just shove a cutlass in your buttocks.
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Paris Hilton and Iron Bess, you are BOTH walking the plank — TODAY!! And after that, meet me at dawn with frying pans in hand — I’ll take you BOTH on with one hand tied behind my back!!!
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Oh that sounds kink o rama…please keep all sharp objects away from the buttocks area. Cutlasses should be used for much classier forms of pillaging. Grasp firmly between teeth, take nearest free swinging rope, launch body onto nearest ship…begin battle! Drink lots of rum…I mean beer…no I mean rum!
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Oh, and by the way, Paris and Iron Bess, if you think we’re taking this all seriously (which it looks like you do, frighteningly) then you both need to loosen up! :)))
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Oh my dearest Beth!
History will show, again!
I invented the Fry pan dual, sure you want to take me on?:)))
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“Wench Beth Jun 28th, 2007 at 10:36 am
Oh, and by the way, Paris and Iron Bess, if you think we’re taking this all seriously (which it looks like you do, frighteningly) then you both need to loosen up! :)))”
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Some here are Beth. Facts are written in these pages.
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Hell O-e W. Don’t say hard to Paris. She’ll jump you!
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Hi Corvus corax… You’re Hawt!!!
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Hey Paris, just call me Corv. You’re looking tasty girl – the time done you good! Whoooeee, yous one Hawt lady!
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Do you like carrion?
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Yikes…if I took this site seriously I would need to go for some serious head shrinking sessions. I love this site with all the mix of its piratey, irreverant, intelligent, pollitically incorrect, give a shit bunch of people who are busily posting all kinds of wierd and wonderful tidbits for us like minded people to read. I even like to see the poor unfortunate, misguided religiously impaired people come on this site and try to ‘enlighten’ this bunch of misfit pirates. So fly at being as fundemental as you want there Wench Beth…as long as you don’t mind me throwing in a couple of my own gems. RAmen
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Thanks Corv.
I’m trying to maintain my Hawtness:)))
As you know… Sometimes it’s hard!
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I like everything BTW! :)
Even some Brits!!!! Some are Hawt!!!!
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The Brits Paris? Yeah, they can be ok. Getting better I think. Twenty years ago I’d have said that the Americans were the best in the world.
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I’m a carrion eater, as you know. Americans were always the best meal! The French stank of garlic, the Brits were, frankly, stringy and I could never be bothered with frozen food. So Canada was out!
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The Brits are getting there – I have high hopes for my “Lard and sugar double chocolate chip cholesterol big-un” ice cream.
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Corv. When I was in prison, the only thing they fed me was carrion.
At lunchtime, it was just a slice between to pieces of bread.
But for dinner, they always mixed it up. And it was Hawt!
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Oh I just had to share this with everyone…it’s greeaaattttt!
Atheists have too many university diplomas! These folks are chock full of secular knowledge. They toss the Bible aside in favor of so-called, “research” and “theories.” They spend their days studying and trying to gather facts and data to support their ridiculous scientific theories, such as evolution and gravity. Don’t let it fool you, Christian Brothers and Sisters! All the secular knowledge in the world can’t disprove that the reason we are all here today was because Eve got some bad advice from a talking snake! Atheists are too full of their silly “logic” to understand that only blind faith leads to sighted Truth. Why, the homo-lovers in England have already accepted that most scientists are naturally Atheists. Don’t let it happen in America! Report your Biology professor – or any so-called teacher who pollutes the soul with extraneous (non-Biblical) information — to the local authorities before he recruits your child!
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Paris – Carrion is much under-rated.
You can do wonders with a bit of road-kill and some Liberty Caps!
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“Mike Honcho Jun 28th, 2007 at 11:31 am
ARRR!! It seems that the prissy blonde has buggered off. Just in time too. The facts I’ve written in these pages must have scared her away. Dumbass socialite.”
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You scared me off? With your facts?
Oh Ok, Got Milk?
Lets hear your “facts” big boy, I’ll bet they’re not Hawt.
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“Corvus corax Jun 28th, 2007 at 11:52 am
Paris – Carrion is much under-rated.
You can do wonders with a bit of road-kill and some Liberty Caps!”
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Muuummm Road Kill! One of my favs!
Over here we have… Betty Trucker… Road Kill Helper.
Good stuff that!
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“Over here we have… Betty Trucker… Road Kill Helper.”
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Is that like A famous brand of Mcburger type thing? Never heard of her, sorry. Have I eaten her yet?
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“Corvus corax Jun 28th, 2007 at 12:17 pm
“Over here we have… Betty Trucker… Road Kill Helper.”
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Is that like A famous brand of Mcburger type thing? Never heard of her, sorry. Have I eaten her yet?”
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Yep! That’s what it is.
Comes in a box with pasta and sauce to add to your Road Kill.
Many flavors, I like squirrel and tomato sauce myself.
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Squirrel? Sounds nice.
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Did you hear that the Beavers have got a petition going? They think that “Beaver” is pejorative! Yeah, really. They want to be called “vagina squirrels”!
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I ask ya! What a set of pussies!
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“Corvus corax Jun 28th, 2007 at 12:30 pm
Squirrel? Sounds nice.
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Did you hear that the Beavers have got a petition going? They think that “Beaver” is pejorative! Yeah, really. They want to be called “vagina squirrels”!
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I ask ya! What a set of pussies!”
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Beaver is over rated anymore.
I’ve ate beaver to death! It’s good! Don’t get me wrong.
I think squirrel is hawter though! Yummy!
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“Mike Honcho Jun 28th, 2007 at 12:31 pm
Paris Hilton
Jun 28th, 2007 at 10:40 am
Some here are Beth. Facts are written in these pages.
I was just making fun of you Paris. You seemed to think this was some sort of serious conversation. Can we start over and be friends? I haven’t had any stupid slut poon in a while. Give me a kiss!! Sorry if I bump into your head but my depth perception is gone since I lost my eye in that boat raid off the coast of Spain last year. Speaking of that my eye patch is beginning to smell. Quieres chingar?”
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I don’t think I want to be your friend.
I don’t like people that try to make fun of me.
Even though you could never pull it off, you tried.
Sorry Mikeo, Maybe my old friend Nicole Richie will like you.
I doubt that though, she’s still Hawt like I am.
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Thank you! I really must be going though…
things to do… things to save… things that are Hawt!
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@Iron Bes
“Atheists have too many university diplomas! These folks are chock full of secular knowledge. They toss the Bible aside in favor of so-called, “research” and “theories.” They spend their days studying and trying to gather facts and data to support their ridiculous scientific theories, such as evolution and gravity. Don’t let it fool you, Christian Brothers and Sisters! All the secular knowledge in the world can’t disprove that the reason we are all here today was because Eve got some bad advice from a talking snake! Atheists are too full of their silly “logic” to understand that only blind faith leads to sighted Truth.”
Riiiiigghht. Ok. For further enlightenment on how science and religion compare I suggest to take a look at
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http://www.wellingtongrey.net/miscellanea/archive/2007-01-15%20–%20science%20vs%20faith.html
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why are people so bad a recognizing sarcasm, even if they use it themselfs?
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http://www.wellingtongrey.net/miscellanea/archive/2007-01-15%20–%20science%20vs%20faith.html
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That is HAWT!
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Hey DPG – thanks for the link, excellent flow chart, love it, may use it in the next engineering meeting I have to attend.
That silly bunch is always blathering on about theories and testing things. Really what they should do is ask god if their theoretical structure will stand up to the forces, then go to bed and wait for god to answer the question in their dreams, if the answer is ‘go for it’, then curtail the costly testing part and build it. And if they really, really believe (and of course pray hard enough) they should be good to go. What a money saver!
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Oh, Paris, I totally forgot… of course it was you who invented the frying pan duel! My apologies! But I think I have enough experience now to take you on! Meet me at dawn and we’ll see who is most HAWT with the pans!!!
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A Frying Pan Deul! That is so HAWT! Where will it take place?!
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I’d love to see a frying pan duel between the Invisible Pink Unicorn and the FSM. Hands down…I mean appendages down…my money is on the FSM.
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“Aristotle, Penguin Lurver Jun 28th, 2007 at 1:59 pm
A Frying Pan Deul! That is so HAWT! Where will it take place?!”
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My house, the next time I get to Hawt again.:(
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“Mike Honcho Jun 28th, 2007 at 2:55 pm
Using the same lame joke over and over and over is so hawt. Right Paris?!”
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Keeps you coming back… Right Mike?!
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Hey there, it’s everybody’s favorite pope dropping back in to say hello and admire the wonderful ASCII art that the FSM hath delivered us!
Though I can’t say I’m impressed by the attendance at CoFSM, people decided to stop coming or something?
RAmen
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Not much reason to come anymore, Pixely.
It got stale.
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senja Jun 28th, 2007 at 1:34 pm
“why are people so bad a recognizing sarcasm, even if they use it themselfs?”
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RAmen senja. That never ceases to amaze me at CoFSM. You think it could be that they think themselves the only ones who know satire or sarcasm when in fact it goes straight over their head? Come across that a few times here. I think maybe it’s their “perceived” intellectual superiority that does it.
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@Paris Hilton
“Not much reason to come anymore, Pixely.
It got stale.”
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ASCII art is never stale! Haha, it got stale around January, but a lot of people stayed anyway. Since you call me Pixely I assume you know me, but the name change confuses me, enlighten me!
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RAmen
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