Mr Henderson,
Why are you doing this? I stumbled on this sight last nite! What the FUCK! WHY????? You mite want to go to hell but why do you need to take psople with you?????
I hope you are beeing payed well!!
I and my friends think this is dangerus, do you no what you are doing? I pray you you do!!!!!!!
[note from Bobby- I think this one may be fake. What do you guys think?]
The Church is funded entirely by your purchases of FSM merchandise. Thank you for your support.
An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
|
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 License. This means you're free to use the content but not sell it. More Details |
A possible fake, although the grammar and stupidity are very convincing.
@Mathy Kid
I always thought the worst insult was to be called stupid. Of course, it only counts if the person calling you stupid is intelligent. So, the people who write these hatemails don’t really qualify. Hence, they move on to the second most powerful weapon in their arsenal… the threat of eternal damnation. Ooooooh… scary, eh?
.
You know, I haven’t read much of the bible myself… I found it way too hateful and depressing. But I do read a lot of books… histories, fiction, politics… anything. The books I have read that are about religion have permanently skewed my understanding of God/Satan. I prefer to think that, if they did exist, Satan was the original humanist. I think he and God argued because Satan was getting sick and tired of all the smiting and shit that was going on. In some stories, Satan actually falls in love with a human woman, which leads to him challenging God because he doesn’t like the fact that this woman is destined to die. So blah blah blah, they fight, God wins, and history is written by the victor. Personally, I like the idea of Satan a lot more than I like the idea of God. Satan questioned what he was told, instead of just accepting everything as unquestionable and written in stone.
If this post were a hoax, I see no point to it. If it was meant to get us all riled up against dumb-ass faith-heads, sorry, we’re already there. No, I think this is a genuine sample of the mind of a true believer. I’ve received work-related e-mails from those who I know are believers and they are equally incoherent, even when it comes to mundane work issues. Poor grammar and poor reasoning skills: the bastard offspring of a mediocre education.
The post is a fake. They spelled the word “Site” as “Sight” and spelled the words “Night” and “Might” as “Nite” and “Mite”. This is obviously intentional. The method of incorrect spelling was a mental slip. The rest of the bad spelling could be accidental or just plain stupidity (more likely), but the three I listed above are intentional reversals in spelling error. I’ve been gone for a long time (I travel a lot for my work,) but I’m always happy when I return to see the latest parrot-shit on this site. May her noodley appendages touch you just where you need it most!
We need more publicity. The hate mail has reached an all-time low. Come on folks!!! Spread the Noodly Word so we can get more hate-mail to give our constructive criticisms to!!
.
St John the Blasphemist
Saint of Slagging Off
With Easter approaching and all!!
Time for more of us to visit a few of the xtian forums I think :))
@ John the Blasphemist and Wench Nikkiee - RAmen! I agree…I’ve been spreading the Noodly Word but it’s been well accepted so far so no hate mail from that source. This site does need a really good xtian to get us all fired up though. Fingers crossed!
Qty. Did Adam Have a Bellybutton?
Ken Ham
Here is a great book for the layman who wants answers, but doesn’t want to go very deep. Short, concise answers to over 150 questions related to the Bible.
Suggested Donation: $11 Product Code: C00073
Darwin’s Demise
White / Comninellis
This cutting edge book challenges conventional teaching with provocative, science -based answers to some of the greatest questions. The authors have a passion for the truth. In Darwin’s Demise, they succeed in showing why real science is burning down the House of Darwin.
Suggested Donation: $13 Product Code: C00068
http://creationstudies.org
There’s a whole library of these educational books at this site.
They would make wonderful Easter gifts.
Refuting Evolution
Jonathan Sarfati
A creationist response to the National Academy of Science’s Teaching About Evolution and the Nature of Science. The latter, distributed nationwide to thousands of public school teachers, is an effort to saturate students with evolutionary concepts. Refuting Evolution is a cogent rebuttal, carefully examining the points raised in the NAS booklet: science and religion; natural selection; bird evolution; astronomy; the age of the earth, etc. Written by a well qualified voice for creationism, this book will be an invaluable answer summary for both homeschool and public school teachers
Suggested Donation: $11 Product Code: C00210
Send one to your local school board, pricipal and especially, kindergarten teacher.
Better than a chocolate rabbit. Well not really, Chocolate rabbits are probably the best idea Christians ever came up with.
Ahhh yes… for all those times when you’re out camping and need toilet paper, or firelighters, or a good laugh.
.
Please watch Ken Miller’s (a far better Ken than Ham) lecture on the other thread, to see why real science is not only burning down the House of Intelligent Design, but pissing on it’s ashes, mixing them with cocaine, and giving them to a certain rolling stone…
@Capekicks
“Send one to your local school board, pricipal and especially, kindergarten teacher.”
Yep, if you want to get creationism into peoples heads you’d better start when they’re still in kindergarten. If you start when they’re in college they’ve learned to think for themselves and won’t fall for the nonsense anymore. Quick, indoctrinate them when they are still highly impressionable! Keep that rational thought and inquisitiveness at bay! Sorry, didn’t hear you there, what did you ask? WHAT, haven’t I told you so many times before! NO critical questions! No independent thinking!
I think it’s best to home school the DPG. That way you can grow them up like you do mushrooms. Just keep them in the dark and feed them on BS.
RAmen
Oops not “school the DPG” “school them” “school them”
Hahahahaha, funny typo Nikkiee :) :)
.
Saw an article about that the other day, a boy that was beeing home-schooled to prevent him being exposed (their words) to “so-called science, taing him away from our faith”. Poor kid, parents like that should be sued for child abuse.
@Nikiee
“I think it’s best to home school the DPG.”
I guess one is never too old to learn :) Although I doubt if my pea-for-brain Catholic father has much intelligent insight to teach me.
This kind of site can only exist over the pond in that pathetic country of yours. I mean, a spaghetti monster, WTF!!! Now it just becomes even clearer how “only” 60 mil of you cocksuckers voted for Bush; the other 240 mil are too retarder to write!
@Johnny
You’re wrong in a couple of ways.
First: Google ‘Dover trial’ and read a bit about efforts to introduce Intelligent Design into class rooms. Then look up the meaning of the words ‘parody’ and ’sarcasm’.
Second: people being too retarded to write doesn’t stop them from voting for Bush. You the four r’s that form Bush’ voters right? They are
- rich
- religious
- redneck
- retarded
apologies for my english brethren. Please forgive johnny as he has not yet been touched by His Noodly Appendage yet. Ironically, the majority of pirates 200 years ago were english. We just called them privateers. I also find it rathere embarassing that an American is explaining irony to an Englishman. Still, I love you Johnny and hope that you become pastarised soon. Well, I don’t REALLY love you, I was just being nice
@Johnny Apr 9th, 2007 at 3:16 pm
“This kind of site can only exist over the pond in that pathetic country of yours. I mean, a spaghetti monster, WTF!!!”
.
I’m an Aussie and I BELIEVE!
The FSM is much cooler that a thorny bleeding guy pinned up on two sticks.
The FSM is Noodly…may you feel that sometime soon :))
Johnny, Johnny, Johnny - I did not vote for Dubya and I am not retarded. I am an American, by virtue of the fact that I was born here, as were the members of both sides of my family for as far back as anybody knows. Well, there was apparently some female ancestor from France, but that’s not important now. I can’t help where I was born, and I’m not ready to leave the country (yet). If another Republican gets in the White House in 2008, I may have to wash my hands of the whole country.
.
As for believing in the Flying Spaghetti Monster, we Pastafarians are a diverse and widely dispersed bunch. Sometimes it seems like Americans are in the minority, at lease on these threads. I take it you are British, and I am deeply saddened by your apparent case of Humor Deficiency Syndrome. And you’re from the United Kingdom, home of Arthur Dent and the Knights who say “Nee!” This is a sad day indeed.