Mock all you want, you will come to regret it before moments of your death.
-srv
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
@Praying For You “The prophetic stage is set and we are waiting to see what happens next. At least be aware and read a few chapters before you argue and mock people. Evidence in Ezekiel 38-39 can be seen with a few clicks to credible news sources and it is pretty compelling. ”
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If only I had followed this discussion in realtime, the I could have my little cut & paste work immediately:
“1914, 1915, 1918, 1920, 1925, 1941, 1975 and 1994, etc. were other dates that the Watchtower Society (WTS) or its members predicted.
bullet Since late in the 19th century, they had taught that the “battle of the Great Day of God Almighty” (Armageddon) would happen in 1914 CE. It didn’t.
bullet The next major estimate was 1925. Watchtower magazine predicted: “The year 1925 is a date definitely and clearly marked in the Scriptures, even more clearly than that of 1914; but it would be presumptuous on the part of any faithful follower of the Lord to assume just what the Lord is going to do during that year.” 6
bullet The Watchtower Society selected 1975 as its next main prediction. This was based on the estimate “according to reliable Bible chronology Adam was created in the year 4026 BCE, likely in the autumn of the year, at the end of the sixth day of creation.” 8 They believed that the year 1975 a promising date for the end of the world, as it was the 6,000th anniversary of Adam’s creation. Exactly 1,000 years was to pass for each day of the creation week. This prophecy also failed.
bullet The current estimate is that the end of the world as we know it will happen precisely 6000 years after the creation of Eve. 9 There is no way of knowing when this happened.”
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This is the funnier part of a long list (starting at 30 AD/CE) of end-of-the-world predictions. Anyone a nice day to propose?
@Jean Bart
The day in 2008 the Republicans snatch another presidential election?
@Jean Bart
I’m not falling for the whole end of world thing again…some cult predicted it would occur in 1993 so my self and some like minded fellows thought it might be appropriate to throw a party (just in case the world did end)…we stuffed up the days and were a day early so we were forced to keep the party going (again just in case)…this was a very big party with heaps of “shinnanagins”…suffice to say the world didn’t end but we received an eviction notice to go with the hang over (From memory the world was to end on a Wednesday and thus heaps of normal people {i.e. non Uni neighbours}had to work the next days)…I’ll never trust a millenarian apocalyptic cult again.
@Thumper
“we stuffed up the days and were a day early so we were forced to keep the party going (again just in case)…”
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Nightmare! How did you cope? Did you just buy enough beer to last you until the end of days? Or were you not certain enough :))
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Hiya Thumper, you get the email?
@Alchemist
Buona Mattina!
I did get the email and it looks rather exciting…to be free to cause mayhem without fear of “injury to feeling” as caused by Mr Mills’ most recent callous “banning” of the wabbit has great appeal…I’ll have a close look at it tonight when work is not so pressing.
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My advice for anyone preparing for the apocalypse would be to not simply have enough beer for the apocalypse itself but enough beer, cigarettes and pizza for an after party should you survive the initial blast/flood/freezing/biological menace etc…according to most films I’ve seen on the subject roving bands of mutants tend to molest survivors sheltering in ruined buildings rather then those openly playing loud 80’s music with a jelly wrestling pit and ample beer.
@Thumper
I’m so glad I can spread the joy to others! Do you have a myspace profile? Have a look at operation mindfuck - damned fine idea :)
Hail Eris, RAmen!
@Alchemist Mar 11th, 2007 at 6:54 pm
“Hiya Thumper, you get the email?”
@Thumper â„¢ Mar 11th, 2007 at 7:29 pm
“I did get the email and it looks rather exciting”
“My advice for anyone preparing for the apocalypse”
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Erm…… you mean one of these
http://www.raptureletters.com/
I haven’t got one yet ;)
@Wenchy
The “rapture letter” is one of the most interesting things that I’ve seen this afternoon…thanks for that…I must say I didn’t really appreciate the whole missing persons aspect of the rapture…do you know if the rapture is a Star Trek type “beam me up” or a Bewitched “bing!”…either way I do agree that it will cause “speculation”…
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Alchemist and I were discussing your more “garden variety” apocalypse that Bruce Wills could be involved in…earthquake, flood, balls of fire from the sky…that sort of thing…maybe some mutants…nothing quite as odd as this “rapture” business…
@Thumper â„¢
“do you know if the rapture is a Star Trek type “beam me up†or a Bewitched “bing!†”
Not really sure Thumper…but suggest you keep your inbox open :)
If you receive an email…erm….I think it means you’re not going :(
I think FSM definitely needs to come up with it’s own “end time”. And emails of course :)
RAmen
The first time I went to that site..I had a giggle and thought no more about it. I thought the site was a joke :) Next time I went there…I checked it out…no joke!
Hahahahahaha
I’m sure the FSM doesn’t have an end time, mabye he’ll take us to spaghetti heaven for a quick teaser. “Hmmm, nice sauce, what’s in this grog?”… Before he puts us back down to make some serious choices… See, our God will prove his existance before we die :) …
And there is obviously none of that star trek or magic stuff, he just picks us up…
The day i do not mock religions other then FSM is the day that FSM launches a crusade against another religion and kills millions…. How many have died from Christianity or Islamic or even Buddhism.. Pastafarism is the only religion capable of claiming ZERO DEATHS caused by its religion.. The day they are equal with christianity or any other religion is the day i stop mocking their religion and another thing Doesnt the bible say DO NOT JUDGE OTHERS what do you think you are doing by comming onto our site and blasspheming against our lord. You are breaking your own religions rules by doing so and THUS dooming yourself to the same place that you claim we are going to.
feel free to send me hate mail or have a good discussion at adricp@hotmail.com
RAMEN
The FSM and Daylight Savings Time.
Does anyone know what He thinks of DST? What is His position on it? I don’t like DST and was thinking about telling my employer that I cannot come in an hour earlier (which is what DST makes you do!) because it is against my religion. It would help if I knew for certain that His Holyness the FSM officially frowned upon it. Something like “Thou Shalt Not Move The Hands Of Your Clocks At Whim, For It Is An Abomination To Me”.
“Pastafarism is the only religion capable of claiming ZERO DEATHS caused by its religion”
Yeah sure, until someone over-indulges in a fit of FSM enlightenment and then dies from acute indigestion. Then we’ll never hear the end of it…I can see it now: “BIZARRO NOODLE CULT DRIVES INNOCENT TO GORGE HIMSELF TO DEATH ON SATANIC PASTA”.
Well, that would at least be a sort of culinary rapture for one, wouldn’t it?
True Pasta:
“6) I haven’t offended anyone; I’ve merely spoken the truth. If you don’t like the truth, you are welcome to continue believing your lies.”
Actually, you’re speaking what you believe is the truth. As you have no doubt told many religious folk, just because you believe it, does not make it the truth.
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But anyway. I refuse to defend anyone who makes his point so poorly.
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Maybe when he called you “a fucker” he was just saying you must be getting a lot? ;D So really, you should be thanking him for the compliment, ne?
@Gary InOla
I don’t know what the FSM thinks of it, but I hate it too. I set my clock BACK an hour… because I am an idiot when I am tired, and ended up being two hours late for work.
@ Jean BArt
I agree with your entire post. In my opinion, WTS is a Jehova’s Witness publication that have used numerology to predict the end of the world. Their predictions failed going as far back as the late 1800’s if i remember correctly. Jehova Witnesses are fooling themselves and have take scripture to fit their agenda’s.
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Any who say they worship in the christian circle & attempts to set a date is not following bible teaching & therefore are probably twisting other teachings of the bible as well. They are hypocrates who attempt to preach to others and condemn but than call their own God a liar. Christians are instructed to watch & discern the times for Jesus return, but we are not to know the day or hour, not even Jesus knows but God. Any self professed christian who claims to know even the year is considered a false prophet.
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What christians are instructed to do is discern the times, not predict the end. A generation born in the time that the signs for the end of age will not die until all prophecy of that time is fulfilled. That generation began when Israel was restored in 1948. A generation in the bible is about 70 years. In christian circles, this means is it will happen within this 70 years, with Jesus return ending the generation that will witness these events.
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In my opinion, Catholics, Jehova Witness & Mormons are the cause of much skepticism in the world of religion. Also people like Benny Hin, Joel Olsteen, Pat Robertson and most TV evengelists i consider false based on their corrupt teachings. Assembly of God folks are corrupt as well. These ministries have profited tremendously off of people or twisted the original words of the bible to excuse themselves from what they condemn others for while commiting the same “sin” or “abominations” they accuse & condemn others for.
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I am christian, not all of the above i mentioned are bad, but they have been the main perverters of New Testament doctrine.
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Sorry if this rambled, im at work and need to watch the amount of time i put into comments:) I might try to reserve comment until im home!! Either way i will always try to give my best answer from a christian perspective. See you all later.
@ Thomas of Toano
Yes there is another account but it describes the bursting of his body on the rock in the field he hung himself.
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Im at work now but ill check that and comment when i get home.
TTYL
@Wench Nikkiee - ooh, ta for the link re. the rapture :) Looks like we’ve got an escape clause after all. I’ve got my plan sorted. If I see millions of people in cardigans and sensible shoes eieng sucked off the face of the world I’ll get down on my knees and utter a pious yell of,
“For christ’s sake god. I was only fucking joking! Can’t you take a joke you miserable bastard?”
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One seat at the right hand of bod for me :)
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On a related note, no where to troll on that site BUT I did find this little baby whilst accidentally searching for xtian chat rooms;
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http://www.chatterhead.net/cafe-chat.html
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CafeJesus looks interesting :) - I posted the link to the main page because there’s a conspiracy chat room and psychic chat too! I feel happy :)
@ Dread Wench L’TUAE
Ill comment more specifically when i am home from work later on what you asked about :)
@ PeterPopoff
I dont mind people busting on me, i do the same and have made an art of that and a little sarcasm. I was in the Army for 5 years and partied/prayed to the beer volcano and went to every club in Seattle, central Jersey and NY, including the time i went to college. Im from Jersey as well with 4 other brothers so i can definitely give n take!! I have pretty thick skin so no harm taken:)