Seriously think about this logically. How can a flying spaghetti “whatever†live or make something? If we are made in Gods image, I’m not spaghetti am I? you have probably ruined millions of people’s lives. Y is there pirates in ur religion? I am trying 2 act like u don’t have mental disabilities, but it’s very hard. This is blasphemy and u will probably burn in hell for the next eternity for ruining the lives of millions of people. I don’t know ne1 who “believes†in ur load of #$^@!like the words of others GET SOME HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-greg
I do think logically, the only possible explination is that the FSM created the universe. When you are going to try and insult people, please learn to spell correctly.
Greg, you get the point exactly…religeon has ruined MANY lives. Your only hope, and the hope of us all, is to renounce ALL religeon. There is NO GOD. Good for you! You renounce the FSM, now, go ONE GOD FURTJHER, and renounce your own! Congratulations on your inspiring words! You are one step closer to your own salvation, and have no doubt brought forth the light of atheistic redemption to others! Rock on!
Greg, because I think logically I joined this church. It’s really the only logical thing to do.
“How can a flying spaghetti “whatever†live or make something?”
How can a big, narcissistic, egotistical “whatever” in white robes with a beard live or make something?
.
“If we are made in Gods image, I’m not spaghetti am I?”
We have said countless times that we’re not made in our gods image; it’s too perfect a form. If you would do about three minutes of research you would know that. But even so, what about bacteria? Does your tainted mind see no resemblance there to our Noodly SAvior? We are, however, designed after him on a more basic level. You are made of DNA, I assume. Look at DNA sometime; it looks like long strands of ‘noodles’(DNA) wrapped around some ‘meatballs’(histones). Look at an even more basic level, to the most fundamental thing you can get to: strings/branes of Sting Theory. Just look; tiny vibrating noodles.
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“you have probably ruined millions of people’s lives.”
Spanish Inquisition, the Crusades, the Dark Ages. What about the whole murderous spree Mohammad went on at the very beginning of Islam? That’s just physical ‘ruining’. Our religion is the only one, except maybe Buhddism depending on how you look at it, that has not ever harmed one person.
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“Y is there pirates in ur religion?”
I’ll ignore the grammar and spelling and total lack of understanding of the english language for now. Why are there saints in your religion? What kind of stupid religion makes guys who use three-leafed clovers as explanations of god into their history? And those twelve disciples? Why weren’t they wearing eyepatches?
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“I am trying 2 act like u don’t have mental disabilities, but it’s very hard.”
let’s see: us, spelling and grammar; you, none. Us, coherent, loogical arguments; you none. Yes, of course it’s plausible for you to tell us we have mental disabilities for believing in na religion far more logical than yours,
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“This is blasphemy and u will probably burn in hell for the next eternity for ruining the lives of millions of people.”
Again with the secret millions of people whose lives we have ruined! You are blaspheming the Flying Spaghetti Monster and will burn in Las Vegas, er, hell for the next eternity for ruining the lives of millions of people.
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“I don’t know ne1 who “believes†in ur load of #$^@!like the words of others GET SOME HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
If no one believes in our religion, whose lives are we ruining? Who says we want people to believe us like they believe others religions? Other religions ‘have mental disabilities’.
I have to agree, FSMism is a state which can only be arrived at by logical deduction. the path of FSM is the only true cure to all of that religious nonsense out there, which destroys so many lives. i mean, invisible man in the sky who impregnates virgins and floods the world without leaving any evidence? what kind of illogical bullshit is that?
Greg, read books instead of frothing at the mouth quite so much. no-one claimed we’re made in his image, that would be silly. pirates are obviously his chosen since he has repaid humanities “war against pirates” with global warming, it’s all there in the graphs my friend.
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as an aside how can we burn in hell for the “next eternity”? since eternity covers all time, how can you have a “next”? this would imply a cronologically linear progression which is patently impossible when set against eternity.
.
I’m alss curious how pastafarians, (a kind, all welcoming, non judgemental religion) have ruined peoples lives? as compared to ruining altar boys, homosexuals, free-thinkers, pagans, astronomers, scientists, philosophers, women, ethnic minorities, and anyone else who dared question, disagree or have the unfortunate problem of being born different to the arrogant, mysoginistic, corrupt, homophobic, xenophobic, luddite white, male, hitler youth that dominate christianity?
.
or to put it in words simple enough for you to understand, and maybe use again.
Greg, ur so wrong, get f”£%”6
@ Greg
If you happen to be a christian - please read the bible..
1 Corinthians chapter 5
“12 After all, do I have any business judging those who are outside [the Christian faith]? Isn’t it your business to judge those who are inside? 13 God will judge those who are outside. Remove that wicked man from among you.”
If your not christian - it still is some good advice. Please straighten out your own bunch before you cast any more exclamation marks after us.
Isn’t five exclamation marks in a row meant to be a sign of a deranged mind? Hmmm… Greg has 30. Yep. Sounds about right.
Peace out! Pastafarianism is accepting of all people, we try to love everyone and part of our philosophy is that you are free to believe whatever the hell you like, just don’t shove it down anyones throats is all. We are not ruining lives. We don’t even try to come to your website and insult you.
May you be touched by his noodly appendage, Greg.
RAmen
Greg, seriously now, you think we have mental disabilities, you’re the one who believes in a God who, at the very least, has split personality disorder, and possibly a number of other quite severe psychological disfunctions.
You can’t have it both ways. Either your god is omnipotent and omniscient and just doesn’t choose to intervene thereby purposefully making life very unpleasant for the majority of earth’s inhabitants (many of whom aren’t Christians, so won’t go to heaven either), or he can’t intervene and is therefore not all powerful, but might conform to his all-loving image.
Basically, on current evidence (if you look there’s quite a bit), you can either have an omnipotent god who is a schizophrenic, sadistic maniac, or you can have a really nice god who is about as powerful as your average cheese sandwich but is looking down on recent attrocities with great empathy and probably developing a huge complex because he can’t do anything about it. Either way, your god probably needs to “GET SOME HELP!!!!!!!!!”.
We were made in gods image?
Really? First he looked like a hairy ape, later like a fury guy halfbend, then a less furry persone, and finally, now he looks like a normal today type of guy?
Yes, we were made in god’s image. That’s why god is a schizophrenic hermaephrodite.
.
Or, another way of looking at things; suppose the size of a population is directly proportional to that populations resemblance to god. Makes sense, yes? After all, a god would naturally favour those closer to him. By that logic, your god is Chinese.
.
I don’t know why I’m writing this, because you obviously don’t have the attention span to linger… oh well.
@greg
We need some help? What about people who believe in an apparently infallible, all knowing, merciful and perfect DUDE who created Adam , from which HE knew before creating him, that Adam would eat from the fruits of the “evil treeâ€, which HE planted as well by HIMSELF (to be on the save side, HE even designed a snake to persuade Adam to do something bad). After having been quite angry about people for say 2000 Years (I reckon before “Jesusâ€, even good people must have been send to hell or limbo?), the beloved DUDE decided to send HIS son (or is it now HIMSELF?) down to earth where he let HIMSELF/(or his son) torture and nail to a wooden cross.
Since this extensive acupuncture, HE is “relatively†relaxed with the sins committed by Adam and sends you “only†to hell if you do not believe HIS rather adventurous, cool story.
Well if that is not convincing…..what else is…
Another question: If I was perfectly designed by an omnipotent DUDE, then I wonder why I have to wipe my arse, every time I go for a dump. I mean, the “stay clean cap†on my squeezable honey works perfect and is not exactly rocket since, is it? The same applies for my former guinea-pig (peace been upon him). His droppings where just perfect without any mess. In other words, does that mean that the DUDE spent a hell of time for perfecting the bum of guinea-pigs, and created our bum during coffee break (I thought we are the state of the art of his creation?)? Pressumably creationists do not have this problem since they release their crap via mouth by spreading and defending their fairytale.
RAmen
Errata: I meant “rocket science” instead of “rocket since”.
Also sinuses, the spine, just about every aspect of the human body looks like it was cobbled together on a thursday afternoon when the creator was keen to be off to the beer volcano and stripper factory. Yay! more proof of the FSM!
Don’t forget the crossover of our aesophagus and airway. Not a brilliant design move, that…
lisn m8! wtf ru using thez old irc words 4? u kno ppl could undrstnd u if u tlaked a bit more snsibly! & u sed sumthin they cud understnad!!
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Oh and I don’t look like an old guy with a long beard & nor do any of my friends (well I do have a friend that doesn’t shave for a year & his beard grows huge & then he shaves it off for charity, but he isn’t an old guy, so it doesn’t count, and I do have friends who are old but they don’t have long beards). I do, however, have lots of friends whose body parts, and the molecular structures that make them up, look like spaghetti & meatballs.
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And what is the ‘next eternity’? Did the last eternity finish or something?
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St John the Blasphemist
Saint of Finite Eternities
Speaking of Hell…(which you forgot to capitalize) i wouldn’t mind going there… I’ve seen some pictures and Hell, Idaho isn’t that bad of an area. There are trees, lakes, mountains, rivers, and much more. Secondly, humans are NOT in the Flying Spaghetti Monster’s image… if we were we would be all noodly and thats His job.
I once had a jehovahs witness say to me that when we were in the garden of eden we were perfectly designed, but since then we have slowly changed to being badly designed because we were naughty. I lost hope at that point.
Nutshell:
I am trying 2 act like u don’t have mental disabilities, but it’s very hard.
I lost hope when I found out that most of Christianity and Catholicism don’t practice what they preach. think about it, wouldn’t you lose hope too when you find out that they pick and choose what Commandments to follow and when? it seems to me that a lot of people don’t follow Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery. a few Popes have been killed by enraged husbands for sleeping with their wives. its sad sad world
Do these people ever notice that every time they insult us, we can just mirror what they said and end up equally insulting them?
No Armbyorg, they don’t, because they either don’t listen or are too thick! :)
…or in this case, don’t stick around to hear it. bloody drive-by posters. grrr.
“You are blaspheming the Flying Spaghetti Monster and will burn in Las Vegas”
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Err, Norway
“You are blaspheming the Flying Spaghetti Monster and will burn in Las Vegasâ€
.
Err, it should be “freeze in Norway “
or freeze here in Michigan
greg
Why thank you. Thank you very, very much.
Sincerely,
Iron Mike
The ‘next eternity’? What the heck is that?
after this eternity, apparantly.
if burning in hell, gets me out of this cold and away from fundies, I’ll take it:P
@$#% you!!!!!!
.
Seriously think about this logically. How can an anthropomorphic deity “whatever” live or make something? If we are made in God’s image, I’m not some overly illuminated, bearded old fart sitting on a throne am I? You have DEFINITELY ruined millions of people’s lives. WHY is there SYMBOLIC CANNIBALISM in your religion? I am trying to act like you don’t have mental disabilities, but it is very hard. This is blasphemy and you will probably NOT BE ALLOWED TO GO TO FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER HEAVEN WITH A BEER VOLCANO AND A STRIPPER FACTORY for the next eternity for ruining the lives of millions of people. I don’t know anyone who “believes” in your load of #$^@! Like the words of others, GET SOME HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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-Cap’nUberbob
I am now a believer…I have seen the light…the FSM has to be true. Can I go to Hell now. It has got to be warmer there than it is here. (5 degrees today)
Well, LOGICALLY, people were not created in the image of the FSM (sauce be unto Him), but the pasta He gave us to eat WAS. And I don’t see how I am going to go to your hell, since in MY religion I am going to a heaven filled with beer volcanoes and stripper factories. I can’t wait to sit myself mext to a nice pilsner volcano with a frozen mug and place an order for some Asian strippers. That’d be like, well…heaven.
RAmen
@ jjk
I agree with you. its not much warmer here, I think its only like 8 degrees
You said it yourself, Greg; IF you are made in God’s image. Even you don’t sound so certain. And while you may not physically resemble a bowl of noodles, your brain to seems to be about as capable of reasonable argument as a bowl of WAY over-cooked rigatoni.
Cheers, you have just given the people on this site proof of what they have long suspected; that the type of person who would unquestionably accept the theory of any religion, is probably a huge whack-a-doo with poor English skills. I think they start out that way though. I doubt it is the FSM “ruining” their lives.
Now why would you want to go to Hell to warm when you could just accept the FSM (blessed be His meatballs) as your personal savior and warm up next to a volcano? That reminds me. How does (presumably) cold beer flow from a (presumably)hot volcano? Oh well, I guess that’s what faith is for.
RAmen
@ Josh
believe me, I’ve accepted His Noodliness, I just want some warmth. Michigan is freakin cold. and thats a good question about the beer volcano. I have another question about it. I don’t like beer, but I love vodka and rum. would it therefore be a vodka or rum volcano for me?:P
@ O-EJ
What are you, some kind of heathen? His Holy Noodliness has clearly intended us to partake in beer (otherwise, why would there be beer volcanoes?). On the other hand, maybe you could just order something from the bar while enjoying some strippers.
OEJ and Josh - it has long been understood that the FSM in his wisdom knows that not everyone likes the same type of beer, strippers or noodles, so all tastes are catered for, from wheat allergies to the more traditional pirates who like their rum!
Enjoy!
RAmen!
@ Josh
I’ve had beer, and its just not a taste I like. the only brand I’ll drink is Fosters, but thats imported and really expensive. I just prefer the taste of rum. and isn’t rum the more pirate like drink?
Yeah! A fundie to play with…They have no idea what they set themselves up for by posting here. Greg, do you really think that insulting us, using atrocious grammar and spelling and raving like a lunatic will cause any of us to exclaim “I have seen the light!” or some such nonsense and adopt your beliefs? Who’s the one with mental disabilities?
@OEJ - I pray that His Noodlyness is kind enough to provide us with whatever volcano we prefer. I would choose vodka, rum or whisky myself. I do like beer occasionally (had some over the weekend) but it’s not my top choice.
@Josh - An interesting question. I always assumed the volcano would be at optimum beer serving temperature. Blind faith maybe?
@Booty
Be that as it may, it still does not explain how cold beer (or any cold beverage) flows from a volcano. I don’t mean to question the authority of the scripture, and I don’t want anyone to think I don’t believe. Just a question is all.
@RW
Yeah, somehow Jesus’ message of peace, compassion, understanding, and redemption got lost in translation. It seems so many Xians today are loud-mouth belligerent intolerant…uh…meanies (I’m at work).
I think The FSM would probably say it seemed like a good idea at the time, but maybe you need to ask Prophet Bobby if you want a definite reply :)
@ Josh - no, I think judging by a lot of stuff in the Bible (especially the Old Testament and Revelations, and also a few choice comments “from the horses mouth” by Jesus himself supposedly) they are spot on in being loud mouth, belligerent, intolerant meanies!
@Booty,
Yeah, I thought of asking the Prophet himself, but then I’d really rather not get burned at the stake for questioning the Church.
@ RW
maybe it’ll be like in the remake of Mr. Deeds. ya know how he had a drinking fountain with Hawaiian Punch? maybe we’ll all get little personal volcano’s of our favorite alcoholic drink:P
@OEJ - I love the idea!
@Booty - I do think Jesus had a different message than the one we see today. If anyone had actually listened, we might all be better off. But, it was corrupted by power-hungry church leaders. I absolutely agree agree with your assessment of the Old Testament. I’ve been reading a project called “Blogging the Bible” on Slate.com and it’s horrifying to know what is actually in the Old Testament.
It could be a mechanical volcano with an electric refrigerator. The beer would be chilled and pumped out.
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@Greg:
“How can a flying spaghetti ‘whatever’ live or make something?”
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. That’s what omnipotence is all about. Seriously, it isn’t a hard concept.
“I’m not spaghetti am I?”
Correct. You aren’t good enought to be spaghetti.
“next eternity”
What?! There are two? Why didn’t anyone tell me? This changes so much!
.
-Avatar of Reason
@ RW
ya, I haven’t read the bible, but I’ve heard some of the stuff thats in the Old Testament. some scary stuff. kinda gets rid of the whole all-loving and benevolent creator image, huh?
oh yeah, the christian god is not an all-loving sky-daddy. he is a totalitarian monster of the worst kind…so unlike our gentle and benign FSM. fear not, for like all lies and threats, Yahweh disappears when faced with the light of truth and reason.
@RW
I always get a kick out of it when Xians tell me all I have to do is accept Jeebus. Then why did he do all that talking? Why all the speeches about loving thy neighbor, turning the other cheek, etc etc? If you actually read what he said (OK, supposedly said), he sounds like a hippie freak. The conservative fundies today are clearly not reading the bible, or at least have serious reading comprehension problems.
You had me at @$#%………
My life is ruined. If by “ruined” you mean “normal” then my life is ruined. I would agree that I do have some mental disabilities like being completely rational about our universe and how it was created.
@Greg
I have SEEN the light! Oh wait, it just burned out. I suppose thats what you get for using a dimwitted bulb to save you. One other thing, if you believe the whole Adam/Eve thing, then you DO realize that we are all the children of incest right? One more thing, if the bible is your Gods true word, why the rewrite? I suppose that’s all for me at this time and remember, if you’re going to come on OUR website to damn and curse us to hell, please use the correct grammar.
RAmen
“If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.”
Author: Woody Allen 1935-, American Director, Screenwriter, Actor, Comedian
This is my first post. As one who has had his life ‘ruined’ by the Church of FSM, I thought I’d leap to Greg’s defence.
I was raised (through no fault of my own) as a Catholic. After learning to hate myself (for being gay) and others (for ) I was set out unto the world to continue the fine works of my predecessors. (see: Ordo Praedictorum, et al.)
Over the years, I caused significant damage to my fellow humans. Nothing on the scale of some of my peers (see: Council of Elvira, Pope Pius XII, et al.) but I did get to make people cry.
I even fought against pirates, for I was in the Navy.
Sadly, after a botched sucide attempt and some counseling, I was brainwashed to accept myself as is. After all, didn’t ‘He/She/It/The Big WOW’ make me the way I am. My head was filled with all sorts of crazy ideas (see: Sophie’s World) and I was confused.
That’s when the Pastafarians got a hold of me, just after you ‘Fundies’ conjoined Church and State in ‘The Land of The Free’. (I’m Canadian eh, err, Argh!)
Since then, my life has been hell. I’m nice to pretty much everyone. I try to show compassion for those I don’t understand, and those like Greg, that I understand all too well. It’s certainly not easy. I can’t believe I have to wait until the eternity after next to go to hell. I need the vacation!
You see, while Greg’s hell would be packed with lots of well-tanned homos, so would my heaven. Greg and I have a little Yin and Yang thing going on. We bring balance to the universe.
So, since I will spend the eternity after next with this guy, I ask all my Pastafarian brothers and sisters to ‘be nice’. I don’t need Greg hating on me for an entire eternity just because I look so fabulous in my Pirate Fish T-Shirt. I don’t need him making a scene when my good friend Cleopasta (from Toronto) comes by for a Joint and a Beer. See, I told you I was Canadian.
I won’t ever raise my voice to Greg, or call him names. I think he wants us to. It’s easier to hate when both sides sling the same vitriol. I’m going to be nice to Greg, even when debating ID, abortion, or the flatness of the earth. It’s my own special contribution to his personal hell.
Sincerely,
Jnocchi
@ Jnocchi
very well said. its people like you, that accept others for who they are and try to show compassion to everyone that make this world a better place. I try to do the same, but I admit I end up doing a lot more hating than loving. you sir, are a fine example of a great Pastafarian
Ramen
Welcome Jnocchi! Nice to meet you! Pull up a barrel and make yourself at home :)
@Jnocchi
I understand that the stripper factories turn out male strippers too. Welcome to the ONE TRUE RELIGION.
RAmen
http://www.weather.com/maps/news/forecastsummary/uscurrentweather_large.html?from=wxcenter_maps check that shit out. I’m in southeastern Michigan so that shit is headed up at me
ur so not red e 2 axe ept r religion as the truth. C if i care if u donut like us.
Remaking the english language is a blast.
Cum u shud tri it!!!
U shud let us c u p.
this will never get old…
@ biscuit
childish humor is always funny, especially toilet humor and fart jokes:P
@biscuit
I don’t believe it. I’m sorry. Nobody could possibly spell that badly. There are 2 year olds that spell better than that. You are probably GOD unwinding from a hard day of not answering prayers.
@everybody
This is a problem I think we might have with CoFSM.
If people came from spaghetti, then why is there still spaghetti?
@ bill
cause His Noodliness thinks its a fun thing to make us think about that over a nice plate of spaghetti:)
@everybody
One more thought, just thought of it because of my joke above.
You know how creationists offer the argument…
“If people came from monkeys, why are there still monkeys?”
Reply
“If people came from God, why is there still a God?”
ahoi me ‘earties, im from germany and i hope my english will be better as his one.. let me try :)
first of all i think that the pastafaris definitly have to “accept” his words. in my opinion religion was made for the people that need something in their live.. or.. cant accept their live as it is - compare with the words of paul atreides in dune - desertplanet - you know? with all that spice and the big worms. he said something in that way and it wasnt a bad definition. this guy sees that a part of his live is threatened by the fsm, thats why hes crying like a baby and makig all that stuff whith his shift- and numberkeys (%§$&%§!!) dissing the great one and insulting his very logical thinking pastafaris. dont be angry with him, hes taliking nonsense - as i said - just to rescue HIS “soul”, thats egoistic we aren’t, we dont have to, weve got a stripper-factory and a cool pirate-uniform-dressing-”rule” AND a beer volcano.
peace guys go on whith opening americas eyes, and make bush recognize global warming and democracy!
best greets josch from icy hamburg
@ piratesparty
your english was pretty good, enough to get the point across. and welcome to the CoFSM
@OEJ - good luck with that weather! Hope you have grog and chow laid in…
@Jnocci - Welcome! I hope you like it here. I too was raised Catholic. It’s a real challenge (to say the least) to shed the insidious traces that are left behind when we decide to recover from that particular psychopathy. I am most of the way through giving up shame, guilt, anger, fear blah blah blah. Getting rid of those has “ruined my life” by ending depression, reducing anxiety, giving me a healthy self image, ending my insistence on being destructive to me and everyone around me…I could go on but I need to get on with some housework!
@everyone - you may be interested to know that I was talking to a mentor one day that I swear to FSM I had no idea was a fundie. I was disussing a teenager I was trying to help deal with some real anger issues left over from being abused by a babysitter when she was three. The person I was talking to actually said to me “Has she accepted Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior?” Me - silence, then - “I don’t know”. “Because if she does, the anger will just go away.” WTF? Just thought I’d share…
And now I really must do some housework! Dang it!
@One-Eyed Jimothy - I’m in Lansing Michigan and the weather is SHIT! I hope his noodly appendage guides my ass home safe tonight…..I have a potty mouth. Arrrr
@ RW(for when ya get back from the housework:P)
so let me get this straight, accepting Jesus gets rid of anger? bollocks, to take a term from our British friends. and yes, I do have plently of drink and food, but mostly drink. may have to open the bottle of rum I said I was saving for when the Tigers won the World Series:P
This guy puts the fun back in fundamental.
But I’m confused.
1. How many eternities do we get? I was sorta thinking eternity was kinda, you know… self-limiting. It’s got that whole “eternal” thing goin’ for it and what-not…
2. If you stopped trying to act like we don’t have mental disabilities, and started acting like we do, would it free up enough brain cells for you to spell correctly? Because I am perfectly happy to be considered functionally retarded if it improves your writing skills.
3. If you don’t know “ne1″ (presuming this is “anyone” traveling incognito so as not to be associated with this post) who believes in our load of punctuation symbols, how are we ruining millions of lives? Wouldn’t we just be ruining our own? Is this the same kind of logic upon which your religion is based? I think I prefer beer and pasta, thanks all the same.
4. It has clearly been too, too long since I last trolled these hallowed halls, looking for giggles at the expense of organized religion and its purveyors of por… errr, of religion. I should never have been so remiss. I’ve grinned more in the last 20 minutes than I have all day.
:)
Carry on!
@ RN
ya, drive safely. I dunno if you guys are gonna get what we are, I think you may be just north enough to not get what I’ve been being told by friends in Ohio and the news as blizzard conditions. its coming down here, but not a blizzard. of course, who knows how it will be later. be safe and warm
id iz fun 2 sum digri tho aye due ugri thad no wun spelz thees badli ant id cood git tyrzum.
@everybody
I decided to shorten my name for no particular reason. This works better anyway!
@greg
Hell is actually quite cold.
And thank you I’m highly logical.
RAmen
Thanks Jimothy, I heard they practically closed down Cincinnati so I guess I don’t have much room to complain. Yo HO HO and a bottle of rum should do the trick tonight once I’m home.
Going back to the debate of cold beer from a (hot) volcano…If the beer is at a high enough pressure, it could be cold, and still erupt out of the volcano.
Also, I’m another not-so-fond of beer pirate, so I’m all for the whiskey and vodka volcanoes. :)
yep, rum warms ya all the way down:)
I would like a rum volcano please. It’s our heaven, we can have what we want right?
thats what I’m hoping, cause I want a rumcano too:P
@ Bill
Looking at the rise in global population, we seem to have no problem making more people…
Did we literally come from Spaghetti, or did FSM just explain it this way as a parable, fable or just a good old fashioned yarn so that we simple folk could understand the magic of DNA?
I don’t want to delve too much into dogma, interpretations, literal vs. figurative and what type of beer flows from the heavenly volcanoes. Other religions have gone down that road with either amusing or horrific consequence, usually the latter.
@Jnocchi
Saying that we evolved directly from spaghetti, a traditional religious meal of Pirates ca. the good ol’ days, as well as the composition of our Noodly deity, is naiive.
We are made of tiny noodles, maybe not spaghetti noodles, maybe elbow macaroni!
And we evolved from Pirates, which is why we eat spaghetti.
RAmen
!?!
@Ships Cat
If you’re going to make a post, make it so we can all understand what you’re saying.
RAmen
“This is blasphemy and u will probably burn in hell for the next eternity for ruining the lives of millions of people.”
isn’t an eternity forever? if so what happens after this eternity oh what there is only one so i guess it wont be so bad if there were two or three now that would suck and that would ruin my life
@Pixel
Meow!
@rexxxlo
“u will probably burn in hell for the next eternity”…but surely for this to happen we’d have to wait until the end of the first eternity…I’ll risk that…meow!
@Physics Wench
I don’t know how you expect me to take solace in such a faith-less explanation. While I don’t enjoy drinking beer when it’s warm, I’m quite sure I don’t like drinking it at “high enough pressure” either. BTW, what kind of pressure are we talking about here?
@ Josh
prolly enough to knock your head off your shoulders coming out of a fire house
*fore hose
been messing up my typing all day
@Ships Cat
Don’t get me wrong, I like cats, but you make no sense at all.
What does this mean?
?!?
You put those at the end of sentences!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Like that :)
No hard feelings, I just don’t like being confused, it hurts the ol’ brain!
RAmen
*fire hose
thats it, I quit, I give, I’ma go cry in the corner:P
@OEJ - back briefly. Did as much work as I could stand! And now I’m off for my martial arts class. Got my green belt 2 weeks ago (Karate); I can’t help but think fighting is a good skill for a pirate wench!
“Bollocks” is an excellent way to put that (I lived in England for 7 years; been back here for 20 years but still surprise people with English phrases!). As tolerant as I try to be, my relationship with that person did change after that. And I’ve been helping the teenager with her anger by teaching her that she is smart, funny and worthwhile. We still have a ways to go…that stuff doesn’t unwind quickly. This I know from my own head…
I LOVE “rumcano”! For those pirates like us that like rum, try cocount rum and pineapple juice. Measures vary depending on the person but yummy no matter what.
@RN - drive carefully!
@everyone - I’m out for today. Gotta do my best to keep the obsessive personality in check! I used to be addicted to “Heroes of Might and Magic” and I figure this has to be healthier than that was!
@One Eyed Jimothy
It’s okay, we all suck at something!
Just so happens you suck at something practical that we use for eveyday purposes!
I’m an A+ student in Comp Keyboarding!
RAmen
What I find sad is all the hate and anger these fundies have, what gives with that. As I thought xtianity was supposed to be about peace and love, well thats what many of them claim anyway. Perhaps they need more pasta with lots and lots of sauce and to be wrapped in his noodly appendages.
But I do like to see all the new coverts whenever I pop in, like Jnocchi and piratesparty whenever I visit, welcome.
RAmen
@ RW
have fun, and I may try that concoction
@ Pixel
My Question was rhetorical, but I appreciate your interpretation.
@everyone
Best wishes to all those getting stormed in. Not to perpetuate stereotypes about Canada, but it is presently -24°C (-32 with Wind Chill) and I’m about to walk home.
The good news (for me) is that when I get home I will have a big steamy dish of Pasta e Fagioli to warm me up. Perhaps a Dark & Dirty as well - 3 fingers Dark Rum, 1 finger Coke, slice of lime optional.
Fights the chills and the scurvy at the same time!
Jnocchi
@Pixel
“Don’t get me wrong, I like cats, but you make no sense at all.
What does this mean?
?!?”
Confused, excited and then confused again - it’s a cat thing.
@ Pixel
normally I’m fine or I catch it before I post. just been off today
Found a site www.piratesofthecarobbean.com about a veg pirate group for any veg pastafarians out there. So hopefully these veg pirates will help stop global warming.
P.S.
I know this has nothing to do with the greg fellow above, but this was the most recent thread, and there didn’t seem to be any logical place to post this.
@Ships Cat
Well then, good show! Carry on laddie!
@One Eyed Jimothy
I’m suuuuure you are.
Just positive.
RAmen
@ Pixel
I is! I swears it 2 b tru!
There seems to be very little consensus on what kind of alcohol the volcanoes should be spewing forth, despite the gospel clearly saying beer. Perhaps we should just rewrite them as “ethyl alcohol beverage of your choice volcanoes”. Can we at least agree the factories churn out strippers?
@ Josh
yes, we can agree on that. they churn out strippers of every variety, women, men, midgets, flatchested, big breasted, every kind ya can think of
@One-Eyed Jimothy
What about nice pussy?
@ Cat
………must…..resist…..dirty…jokes…:P
I’m sure they do:P
I am sure right behind the beer volcano is a wine bar. That is to the left of the rum arena and across from the whiskey a-go-go. Yes, my fellow Pastafarians, there will be spirits for everyone. Even a soft drink and juice pavilion! Just have faith.
@ Marc
OH THANK THE FSM FOR CLEARING THAT UP! oopsie, got a wittle bit excited. I’m a bit of a rum fanatic:P
@Marc McOar
What about milk based cocktails?
@Jimothy
By the FSM, you truly are blessed. He has returned your typing skills!
.
Oh, and I’m re-reading the Gospel(again), wanna keep myself versed!
RAmen
@ Pixel
isn’t it wonderful?:P
@ Cat
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070213/od_nm/milk_beer_dc_1
there ya go kitty cat.
@ O-EJ
An infinite being creating infinite varieties of strippers. His Holy Noodliness has surely provided for His pirates.
RAmen
@One-Eyed Jimothy
Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
@ Josh
yep, His Noodliness is awesome
@ Cat
I figured you’d like that
I’ve been thinking about the cold beer/hot volcano thing again. Since the FSM is all-powerful, He could easily change all our palletes so that we like warm beer. For that matter, He could create volcanoes that spew any kind of foul liquid (say, ammonia or Zima) and change our palettes so that we like it. What the FSM provides in heaven is really entirely arbitrary. And if it’s all arbitrary, what does that say about the moral code He provides us, since He can designate anything He wants as good and anything as bad? Oh, man, I think I may have a religious crisis! Not again!
@ Josh
quick! go get drunk! you’ll be fine once your sloshed!
Don’t worry. I know logic and questioning are just obstacles to faith. Plus a quick jab of a screwdriver to the frontal lobe will help prevent me from thinking too much. I must admit I briefly considered converting to the IPU, but I can’t bring myself to worshiping anything pink, no matter how many questions I have about beer volcanoes. I guess the pesto just looks greener on the other side.
@One-Eyed Jimothy
I noticed somwhere up there that you like Foster’s. It may interest you to learn that pretty much NOBODY drinks it in Australa cos it tastes like catspiss & heaps of much better brands exist. Try Cooper’s if you want something tasty. With a counter lunch in every glass, you can tell the difference between it & those lagers that mislabel themselves as ‘ales’.
.
Just thought I’d let you know
.
St John the Blasphemist
Saint of Real Ale
@ St. John
thanks for the info, maybe I’ll try it out
Greg is obviously a member of the losing side of the Kansas Board of Education who recently had to watch their insane decision of teaching Intelligent Design in schools as science OVERTURNED. HA HA HA HA HA. Victory of common sense over medieval superstitious rubbish…awesome. America is finally getting back on track after all.
@St John the Blasphemist
I take offence at the “cat piss” reference.
One-Eyed Jimothy
Fosters is more like goat urine and Coopers isn’t much better. For Aussie beer you need to look at your xxxx Bitter or Tooheys New. Cascade Premium is another favourite.
Wel I wil typ liek u haf a men-tal problem, wii r not kreated in god’s image he kreated us in teh image most funny 2 him.
No probs. Foster’s only ever became that famous cos of the Bazza McKenzie movies. Try ANY other Australian beer & chances are it’ll taste better than that.
Is this cat stuff really compatible with all pirate stuff? I mean, don’t pirates have parrots? How long would that last? Cat’s don’t sit on your sholder that well, either. (Well I guess some make good wrap-arounds.)
@Bill
Hi Bill!
Ships Cat was a cat kept aboard ships to chase off vermin i.e. rats and mice. Most useful then a parrot and easier to get along with then an undead monkey (movie reference - Pirates of the Carribean)
@Ships Cat
They just chased off the vermin? What was it like “VERMIN OVERBOARD!”
@Bill
“What was it like “VERMIN OVERBOARD!—
Along those lines. A pied piper of the seven seas if you will.
I do not really care about that intolerant fanatic prat this comment is for:dantes_tormernt, navigator spider and cerebrum durum, you guys should have lots of kids and teach them all to THINK above all. you guyS rock XD
@Ships Cat
You mean the cat’s never, like, ate the rats?
@Yuunako
Lot’s of kids? For a while there I though you like these guys.
:-)
P.S. Welcome
Dear Greg,
Why AREN’T there pirates in YOUR religion? They’re way rad.
~ihatemyspace
Oops. Maybe I should put that in terms you can understand.
Dear retard.
Y rnt their pirates in UR relgion? Their way rad.
~ihatemyspace
@jimothy
I don’t bother reading the whole post before I go ahead and make fun of whatever fundie is on the menu…so that’s why I just realized you live by me! And we’re SO in for it, weather-wise. Freezing in Hell is right…
@ IHM
ya, what I heard was we’re supposed to get at least 12 inches. I’m in Monroe, where you from?
I like how he says ‘the next eternity’ as if there are a line of subsequent eternities.
.
Hmm, that’s actually kind of deep. I think that ole Greg here unwittingly stumbled onto