Oh, so THAT’s how fundies see FSM. That explains their worries and subsequent hatemails…
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3 -
Rice Noodle -
Jan 31st, 2007
Wow the FSM is multiplying.
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4 -
Dread Wench L’TUAE -
Jan 31st, 2007
OMFSM^(^_^)^
They look so cute!
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5 -
Rortatious -
Jan 31st, 2007
More proof that FSM loves lame dancers. Now I can guiltlessly join a congo line.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
6 -
Lolli Popoff -
Jan 31st, 2007
Is that like an FSM daisy chain?
Like or Dislike: 0 0
7 -
PirateyMorgan -
Jan 31st, 2007
Everyone loves to join a congo line! *dances* GO FSM!
Like or Dislike: 0 0
8 -
TrueBeliever -
Jan 31st, 2007
is someone mass producing statues of the FSM for worship? if so, i want one!
Like or Dislike: 0 0
9 -
Wench Beth -
Jan 31st, 2007
I think it’s an FSM DNA strand. What do you think?
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10 -
aalicewonder -
Jan 31st, 2007
Whaaaat? Why don’t I have one?
Like or Dislike: 0 0
11 -
Kaptain Jimmy -
Jan 31st, 2007
Proof that FSM condones cloning research!
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12 -
Kaptain Jimmy -
Jan 31st, 2007
Hey does anyone know if we kan put our FSM piks onto that new flickr thingy?
Like or Dislike: 0 0
13 -
Bosun (Boatswain) BuRn -
Feb 1st, 2007
I’m sure it’s possible, Keptain, but i bet it’s a random feed from pictures tagged as FSM or something.
As for the plushies… I can’t wait to see TY take them on as the next Sketti Babies
Like or Dislike: 0 0
14 -
Red DutchPasta Kidd -
Feb 1st, 2007
Oh, cute! Where can I get one??
Like or Dislike: 0 0
15 -
Booty -
Feb 1st, 2007
Kaptain Jimmy…
There are free flickr accounts, just go to their main site to find out how to sign up, then you can put whatever photos you like up, tag them FSM and they might come up – there are quite a few already though if you do a search.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
16 -
Captain Mad John Kidd -
Feb 1st, 2007
Wow, now everyone can have their own personal FSM!!!
.
Okay, okay, I’m sorry, I just couldn’t resist. So sue me. :]
Like or Dislike: 0 0
17 -
Wench Beth -
Feb 1st, 2007
So who made these adorable FSM’s? And how can we all get one? Anyone, anyone?
Like or Dislike: 0 0
18 -
Mozillagrrl -
Feb 1st, 2007
The Flying Spaghetti Monsters you see in the photo above are pins that I made for an art show last year.
They’re known as leis, or a lei (pronounced layz, or a lay).
Like or Dislike: 0 0
22 -
gomer -
Feb 1st, 2007
what are these things??
whtever they are, i want one.
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23 -
Jean Bart -
Feb 1st, 2007
I can imagine those FSMmies dangling above my dashboard. Time to put away the St. Christopher, hahahahaha!
RAmen to you Pirates!
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24 -
gomer -
Feb 1st, 2007
hello
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25 -
Arthur -
Feb 1st, 2007
There are too many comments to spew them all out at once, so I’ll just go with the first ones that come to mind.
.
How does the FSM feel about worshipping graven images? The Catholics changed the rules of Christianity to allow it, but does Pastafarianism have such rules in place to start with?
.
“WE ARE LEGION!!!”
.
This is what we’d have if Bush hadn’t vetoed that damned stem cell research bill…
.
Shieph Buoyardi has been hard at work in his underground lair, waiting, plotting… now, it’s TIME TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!
.
Bum-ba-bum-ba-bum-BA! (congo line tune)
.
On a completely unrelated note, his Noodly Goodness has decided to bless my area with a little snow this morning; it subsequently turned to rain, but nonetheless, a show of goodwill for the ECU Pirates.
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26 -
Arthur -
Feb 1st, 2007
Nevermind on the “graven images” one; the Gospel clearly has instructions on making simulcrums.
.
*shamed*
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27 -
Wench Beth -
Feb 1st, 2007
Mozillagrrl ROCKS! Make a trillion of them and sell them to all the worshippers!
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28 -
Gnocci Man -
Feb 1st, 2007
@Mozillagrrl
Think you could post instructions on how to make those? I’d be willing to write a song about you if you did…
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29 -
Gnocci Man -
Feb 1st, 2007
Chorus:
A trillion little FSMs have come to us this night,
Brought to us by Mozillagrrl, who sits upon His right,
With pasta, peace, and meaty balls,
The army hears His mighty call,
And flies to…
wait a minute, you already DID post instructions! I have to start paying more attention to these things. And the bribe… *cough cough*, SONG was coming along so well…
RAmen to you!
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30 -
the spaghetti shaman -
Feb 1st, 2007
I have a tricky theological problem, hoping you guys can help me. I have just consumed a large bowl of sacramental spaghetti with tomato sauce, parmesan and garlic bread (and grog), but being vegetarian, I omitted the meatballs. Is this heresy? If there must be meatballs, need they be meat or can I use the fake soya ones? I would hate to offend His Noodlyness by not adequately partaking in the sacrament.
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31 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 1st, 2007
the spaghetti shaman,
Ahhh, the proverbial question…
To eat the balls or not to eat the balls… Huuummmmm
This question his been plaguing mankind for twelve days now…
I say, go with the soy, until we get a handle on this…
Ramen
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32 -
Captain WhoopiCozTShat -
Feb 1st, 2007
@the spaghetti shaman
I don’t think the FSM would get angry if a vegetarian refused to eat meat, it’s common sense we’re talking about.
You’ll still get strippers and grog in the afterlife, don’t worry.
RAmen
Like or Dislike: 0 0
33 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 1st, 2007
Pixely dude!
How about… Keeper of the Lollipops!!!
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34 -
Pixel Pop -
Feb 1st, 2007
How ’bout that?
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35 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 1st, 2007
Yea yea!!! That kicks butt!!!!
Ramen
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36 -
Pixel Pop -
Feb 1st, 2007
Looks like “Pixel” is back by popular demand!
I know how you feel Petey, I felt naked without that word, and I quite like wearing clothes.
RAmen
Like or Dislike: 0 0
37 -
Pixel Pop -
Feb 1st, 2007
@Captain Mad John Kidd
Feb 1st, 2007 at 2:55 am
@ hexhunter—â€â€¦Hawaiin flower thingies…â€
They’re known as leis, or a lei (pronounced layz, or a lay).
.
I was visiting Hawaii, and I saw this sweet shirt that had a naked chick on the back wearing a lei and is says “I got leid”, think that’s a real nice pun.
RAmen to Hawaii and their awesome shirts!
Like or Dislike: 0 0
38 -
God -
Feb 1st, 2007
We have seen this site, and we are not amused.
TheOneTrueBible.com is the one true spoken word of me (God). Goest there, and tithe often.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
39 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 1st, 2007
God, stop being so jealous all the time.
Ramen
Like or Dislike: 0 0
40 -
NOT AN IDIOT -
Feb 1st, 2007
REALITY=GOD. STOP BEING IGNORANT IDIOTS! YOU’RE AN EMBARRASSMENT TO MANKIND AND NEED TO STOP BEING FREAKS! DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE FLYING SANDWICH MAN TOO?! DO YOU REALIZE THAT SPAGHETTI HASN’T ALWAYS EXISTED? SO, HOW CAN A SPAGHETTI MAN MAKE THE UNIVERSE? AND BEER VOLCANOES IN HEAVEN! YOU’RE ALL JUST GOING TO REGRET YOUR DENIAL OF GOD. ALSO, WHOEVER DREW THE PICTURE OF THE IDIOTIC AND FAKE NOODLE GUY: YOU SPELLED “MIDGET” WRONG!
-YOU HAVE PROBLEMS.
HELP THE PSYCHIATRISTS MAKE MONEY…
GO TO THEM FOR HELP.
FREAKS!
Like or Dislike: 0 0
41 -
TrueBeliever -
Feb 1st, 2007
hm, someone else that has issues w/the cap locks
since when does reality=god? and why is that on this thread, not “youre going to hell”?
.
another person w/a fake link
:(
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42 -
JonL -
Feb 1st, 2007
@NOT AN IDIOT
You seem to suffer a lack of reality and self awareness.
You are, in fact, an ignorant loud mouthed idiot I’d say. Lot of comment from one who can’t even find the caps key. Grow a brain.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
43 -
JonL -
Feb 1st, 2007
A local exhibiting desperation for some attention?
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44 -
Mike T -
Feb 1st, 2007
Not an idiot, and yet the definition of the word “satire” somehow eludes him…
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45 -
Fr. Corpus Callosum -
Feb 1st, 2007
Maybe NOT AN IDIOT is just a cute name: He plainly IS an idiot.
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46 -
Fr. Corpus Callosum -
Feb 1st, 2007
This army looks like the representation of the FSM in reiterated fractal budding. The FSM exists in all the many dimensions of the multiverse!!
RAmen
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47 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 1st, 2007
Total IDIOT.
Thump wants to be your bitch.
I think your sexy myself, I think it’s your good spelling that alures me.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
48 -
Alchemist -
Feb 1st, 2007
@NOT AN IDIOT
.
Whoop, whoop, would you like me to wrap that for you? Mine’s a pound of cabbages please Sir and don’t hold the Dodo.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
49 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 1st, 2007
Back off Alchemist!
I saw her first!
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50 -
Alchemist -
Feb 1st, 2007
@Lolli – I’ll fight you for her!
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51 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 1st, 2007
From shore to shore with an oar?
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52 -
SaucyWench -
Feb 1st, 2007
Hey, you guys, is that all a gal has to do to impress you? TYPE IN ALL CAPS? GEEZ.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
53 -
Alchemist -
Feb 1st, 2007
Oy Popoff. You and me, outside! Bring your oars!
.
Saucy. You trying to split lolli and me up!
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54 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 1st, 2007
Oh, Saucy.
I thought you knew we loved you?
Shoot I’m sorry, I just thought you knew.
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55 -
SaucyWench -
Feb 1st, 2007
I don’t want to ruin a good thing. You guys go ahead with whatever you were doing with the oars. I don’t want to know any more about it.
.
*Of course I know I’m loved. Who wouldn’t love a saucy wench who can use the words mitochondria and event horizon in the same day? I think I love myself.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
56 -
Fr. Corpus Callosum -
Feb 1st, 2007
@SaucyWench:
.
You don’t have to type in caps to impress me!! Those other guys can have NOT AN IDIOT (with their oars).
Like or Dislike: 0 0
57 -
Arthur -
Feb 1st, 2007
@ “NOT AN IDIOT”
The caps are in place for what I think are obvious reasons. Anyway…
.
“REALITY=GOD.”
I could see if you said “God = real” or something, but the way you worded it is odd, since in your mythology Lucifer is part of reality, and by your equation Lucifer is part of God directly.
“STOP BEING IGNORANT IDIOTS! YOU’RE AN EMBARRASSMENT TO MANKIND AND NEED TO STOP BEING FREAKS!”
All of this is said by the guy coming to speak against the one true religion, in all caps, with a broken link to try and make another insult at us (read where it’s supposed to take you). Not impressed.
“DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE FLYING SANDWICH MAN TOO?!”
No, because that’s simply ridiculous; there’s no evidence of such a thing!
“DO YOU REALIZE THAT SPAGHETTI HASN’T ALWAYS EXISTED?”
Um, obviously it has. Just because man hadn’t discovered it doesn’t mean it didn’t exist. There’s too many analogies throughout scientific history, so I’ll narrow it down to telling you to think about heliocentric theory, Einstein’s theory of relativity, and radioactive decay; just because we didn’t discover these things until fairly recently doesn’t mean they didn’t exist.
“SO, HOW CAN A SPAGHETTI MAN MAKE THE UNIVERSE?”
The same way an old bearded fart can; with omnipotence.
“AND BEER VOLCANOES IN HEAVEN!”
Omnipotence + omnibenevolence. Better than streets of gold, I’ll tell you that.
“YOU’RE ALL JUST GOING TO REGRET YOUR DENIAL OF GOD.”
Even if we were to regret it, Mark 3:29 clearly tells us “Whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven; he is guilty of an eternal sin.” Erego, your religion says we’re fucked anyway. Good thing the entire basis is an outdated, contradicting storybook, as opposed to our religion (which, as has been shown in just this post, is based on empirical evidence).
“ALSO, WHOEVER DREW THE PICTURE OF THE IDIOTIC AND FAKE NOODLE GUY: YOU SPELLED “MIDGET†WRONG!”
Oh, you’ve got us there. The entire religion will surely fall apart because of a misspelling in some of our original texts. /sarcasm
“-YOU HAVE PROBLEMS.
HELP THE PSYCHIATRISTS MAKE MONEY…
GO TO THEM FOR HELP.”
Again, says the gentleman/lady who came into the homr of the faithful with the intent of spreading his God’s love, which apparently consists of namecalling. I’m personally glad I don’t worship that petty god.
“FREAKS!”
And damned proud of it.
.
IF I TYPE IN ALL CAPS, WILL I BE COOL TOO?
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58 -
Arthur -
Feb 1st, 2007
Whoops… didn’t realize that was that long. Sorry all.
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59 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 1st, 2007
That’s Ok Art!
I don’t think there is a limit to post size.
Mine are always short, but only because I’ve got short fingers.
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60 -
the “official” prophet of Albuquerque -
Feb 1st, 2007
belive
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61 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 1st, 2007
Is that in the Land of Enchantment?
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62 -
Red DutchPasta Kidd -
Feb 2nd, 2007
the “official” prophet of Albuquerque
Feb 1st, 2007 at 9:01 pm
belive
*
I am alive thank you.
*
Arthur, that was a very good post, good things to say and funny too. If you have that lenght doesn’t matter. It only matters for droning, boring fundies.
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63 -
the spaghetti shaman -
Feb 2nd, 2007
Hmmmm… isn’t it interesting that we’re the ignorant idiots when they pride themselves on not having had a new thought in 2 millenia?
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64 -
SaucyWench -
Feb 2nd, 2007
@Rr. Corpus Callosum, Thanks. I was going to find a random, smarmy quote as a response to you, which led me to Richard Bach, and then to Douglas Adams. Then I thought that I’d start another quotefest and it might get ugly. That being said, have a great day.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
65 -
Vera Fedele -
Feb 2nd, 2007
che carini! ne voglio uno per il mio altarino.
RAmen
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66 -
Joe Meert -
Feb 2nd, 2007
Time is running out on the Flying Spaghetti Monster Challenge
This is a chance for you to win a boatload of cash (albeit old Turkish lira).
Cheers
Joe Meert
Like or Dislike: 0 0
67 -
Violadude -
Feb 2nd, 2007
Wow, a person trying to be God.
EVERYBODY knows that the real God is the FSM. Read a book sometime. If you are the real god, smite me down with your terrible power! Go on, smite me O mighty smiter! Ask who is to be smited, and they shall be smoten!
…
ARRRGH! *falls on floor*
Nah, just kidding!
All hail the FSM!
Like or Dislike: 0 0
68 -
CcGame -
Feb 2nd, 2007
@NOT AN IDIOT
Everything you said retorted what your name states. By imposing tyrannical methodology with the idea of subliminal and eternal fealty to a entity of your creation is something I can’t do. It’s like giving a kid a submachine gun with no kickback…bad idea.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
69 -
min -
Feb 2nd, 2007
That’s so cute! so lovely!!
Prease come to my home!
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70 -
Wench Beth -
Feb 2nd, 2007
To the “official†prophet of Albuquerque… who are you? Are you really in Albuquerque? If so, let’s either duel to the death or meet for lunch at Sadie’s or something.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
71 -
Arthur -
Feb 2nd, 2007
@ Wench Beth
Durn it, the only local Pastafarian I know is Nick the Missionary, and he seriously looks like he’d eviscerate me in a duel…
.
Maybe I can challenge him to a rousing round of Guitar Hero or something where my geekitude (yes, I make up words on the spot) would give me the upper hand!
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72 -
Teddy -
Feb 2nd, 2007
@NOT AN IDIOT, Satire!
.
@Everyone else, NOT AN IDIOT: Satire!
.
.
Awesome, he can spell. That’s made my day. Now for the next part.
@NOT AN IDIOT: Take your finger off shift, it’s easier to type. And, of course, easier to read.
.
.
Love the noodley bits up above.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
73 -
Mike T -
Feb 2nd, 2007
NOT AN IDIOT reminds me on this scene from “Monty Python’s Life Of Brian”:
BRIAN: I’m NOT THE MESSIAH! Will you please listen? I am NOT THE MESSIAH, do you understand?! Honestly!
WOMAN: Only the true Messiah denies His divinity!
Thus, only the true Idiot denies his idiocy.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
74 -
Jean Bart -
Feb 2nd, 2007
@NOT AN IDIOT
ssshhh, be vewy vewy quiet, I’m hunting fundies!
OK, folks, don’t get upset, I stole this wonderful expression from Pixel Pop in another thread. But I like it a lot, and maybe it can help to draw people from that to this thread…
RAmen to you Pirates!
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75 -
Alchemist -
Feb 2nd, 2007
Jean – I think a few of us have been naughty boys recently :) Let’s hope it works!
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76 -
TrueBeliever -
Feb 2nd, 2007
@Jean Bart
whats wrong with that thread?
Like or Dislike: 0 0
77 -
Soldier of God -
Feb 3rd, 2007
YOU IDIOTS ARE ALL GOInG TO BURN IN HELL! DON’T YOU KNOW OF ALL THE PROPHECIES IN THE BIBLE THAT HAVE COME TRUE??? DON”T YOU KNOW JESUS DIED FOR YOUR SINS! YOU DENY REALITY AND PRETEND TO BELIEVE IN SOME FSM, BUT WE ALL KNOW YOU REALLY BELIEVE IN GOD AND ARE JUST TOO ARROGANT TO ADMIT IT. I HOPE GOD HAS MERCY ON YOU…PERHAPS HE’LL SPARE YOU HELL AND JUST MAKE THE REST OF YOUR LIVES SHIT HOLES.
AS FOR ME aND MY HOUSe, WE WILL SERVE GOD!
Like or Dislike: 0 0
78 -
Dread Wench L’TUAE -
Feb 3rd, 2007
@Soldier of god- “aND MY HOUSe,”
Your caps lock button is on the fritz^_^
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79 -
Soldier of God -
Feb 3rd, 2007
Sorry. I came across a bit harsh, just because I really don’t want you guys to burn in hell, and it makes me angry you would throw your souls away so willingly. I’ll pray for you.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
80 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 3rd, 2007
Soldier of God, Thanks for the kind loving words.
You can now go F*** yourself, run along know.
It’s past your bedtime. Only big kids here……
Like or Dislike: 0 0
81 -
Soldier of God -
Feb 3rd, 2007
“Run along know”
Typical Atheist grammar mastery level.
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82 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 3rd, 2007
#12
F**** off now….
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83 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 3rd, 2007
Soldier of God Feb 3rd, 2007 at 8:39 pm
YOU IDIOTS ARE ALL GOInG TO BURN IN HELL! DON’T YOU KNOW OF ALL THE PROPHECIES IN THE BIBLE THAT HAVE COME TRUE??? DON’’T YOU KNOW JESUS DIED FOR YOUR SINS! YOU DENY REALITY AND PRETEND TO BELIEVE IN SOME FSM, BUT WE ALL KNOW YOU REALLY BELIEVE IN GOD AND ARE JUST TOO ARROGANT TO ADMIT IT. I HOPE GOD HAS MERCY ON YOU…PERHAPS HE’LL SPARE YOU HELL AND JUST MAKE THE REST OF YOUR LIVES SHIT HOLES.
AS FOR ME aND MY HOUSe, WE WILL SERVE GOD!
.
Times are truly hard, when I lower myself to respond to the author of this.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
84 -
Soldier of God -
Feb 3rd, 2007
K….*wack* *wack* *wack* *squirt*…i’m done F***ing off now…
So, back to the problem. All Atheists are retarded and seperated from reality and it is dangerous to their existance. I hope you guys get on the right track or your going to be severely tortured in the afterlife. God eats shit like you for breakfast.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
85 -
Alchemist -
Feb 3rd, 2007
Hi there Soldier of God.
How are you? Have you had a good day? I have (we won the Calcutta cup – forget Jesus Wilkinson is god!) I’m full of the love of oars.
I think you’re sexy! Do you want to meet up sometime. I’ll bring the lube :)
Like or Dislike: 0 0
86 -
Soldier of God -
Feb 3rd, 2007
Mmmk…if you’re a young, attractive women I’m sure jesus can look the other way for a bit.
=P
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87 -
Alchemist -
Feb 3rd, 2007
Hmm post loss!
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88 -
Alchemist -
Feb 3rd, 2007
Soldier. I can always wear a wig! I’m really a lesbian trapped in a man’s body. Can jesus join in. I’ve never done the troilism but I’m game for most things!
:)
Like or Dislike: 0 0
89 -
Soldier of God -
Feb 3rd, 2007
Narrarator: And so the soldier of god backed slowly away from the Venganza.org website then thundered into a sprint for his life, forever damaged and disturbed, daring only to return in his nightmares. The soldier of god not only leaves the site with an involuntary eye twitch and a new fear of oars, but has also gained an utter defeat, and a realization of the courage it actually takes to serve his imaginary god and says: ‘Fuck it. Jesus sucks.’ And he lived happily ever after.
RAmen.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
90 -
Alchemist -
Feb 3rd, 2007
Noooooo. Soldier, don’t go! Just change your name and writing style!
haha
Great vid Kentuckian!
I think I’ve heard that song before! What say you Alchemist?
Like or Dislike: 0 0
93 -
Lolli Popoff -
Feb 3rd, 2007
Does anybody remember that old sixties song…
Where have all the fundies gone… long time passing…
Where have all the fundies gone…
Sooo long ago….?
Like or Dislike: 0 0
94 -
Kentuckian -
Feb 3rd, 2007
hmmm….no. I wasn’t born till the 90’s tho :/ .
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95 -
Kentuckian -
Feb 3rd, 2007
WHO THE FLICK IS VIACOM INTERNATIONAL!!! Sons of bitches deleted the video. Who gave them the right to keep that song from everyone. FSM will pour his wrath on them…
Grrr…
Like or Dislike: 0 0
96 -
Kentuckian -
Feb 3rd, 2007
..ok, it’ back…that was wierd.
that FSM army looks pretty kool. where can I get one of those squishy, lovable little toys?
Like or Dislike: 0 0
97 -
TrueBeliever -
Feb 3rd, 2007
Viacom owns a bunch of tv stations (comedy central and nick included) and they made YouTube take there videos off today. It was in the New York Times today
Like or Dislike: 0 0
98 -
Kentuckian -
Feb 3rd, 2007
I’m surprised all the people who haven’t been enlightened by FSM didn’t molotov their headquarters. Viacom doing stuff like that when at least half the people in the U.S. watch a youtube video everyday. Shame on them. Oh well, FSM would teach forgiveness.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
99 -
Jingles -
Feb 4th, 2007
“YOU IDIOTS ARE ALL GOInG TO BURN IN HELL! DON’T YOU KNOW OF ALL THE PROPHECIES IN THE BIBLE THAT HAVE COME TRUE??? DON’’T YOU KNOW JESUS DIED FOR YOUR SINS! YOU DENY REALITY AND PRETEND TO BELIEVE IN SOME FSM, BUT WE ALL KNOW YOU REALLY BELIEVE IN GOD AND ARE JUST TOO ARROGANT TO ADMIT IT. I HOPE GOD HAS MERCY ON YOU…PERHAPS HE’LL SPARE YOU HELL AND JUST MAKE THE REST OF YOUR LIVES SHIT HOLES.
.
AS FOR ME aND MY HOUSe, WE WILL SERVE GOD”
.
Using the patented F**kwit Finder;
.
Capitalized handle; Negative.
Overuse of capslock; Check.
Alternating upper/lower case; Check.
Incorrect grammar; Check.
Incorrect spelling; Negative (amazingly).
Threats of burning in hell, divine vengeance, etc; Check.
Lowbrow insults; Check.
Lowbrow insults of our god; Half-check (”SOME FSM”! The FSM more like).
Accusations of homosexuality; Negative.
Threats of rape, physical violence, oars, etc; Negative.
.
Scored 5.5
.
4-6: A Nitwit; Likely seeking attention, may not necessarily mean to irritate, but is not aware of proper forum etiquette, and so comes across badly. With patient counselling, and the occasional application of a large blunt object, subject may be cured.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
100 -
hey man, its like….noodly… -
Feb 4th, 2007
i must say…..
crazy awsome…
Like or Dislike: 0 0
101 -
Arthur -
Feb 4th, 2007
Perhaps my n00b is showing, but did Soldier of God strike anyone else as being fake? Something about him just didn’t quite sit right with me… he played the part of the fundy TOO well.
.
Maybe it’s just my imagination, or my lingering hope for mankind that people don’t sink that low in the name of their religion.
Like or Dislike: 0 0
102 -
bill tomlinson -
Feb 4th, 2007
@Arthur
You think anyone ever, from lack of fundys, decides to play the role of fundy to stimulate? I thought of it but it would be an uncomfortable and probably boring, unless you could say something really different.
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Red DutchPasta Kidd -
Feb 4th, 2007
It’s either a real fundie, but one with some intelligence. Or it is a fake one, maybe just someone who came here and decided what he/she could do with some FSM-baiting. See if anyone would bite?
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JonL -
Feb 4th, 2007
@Arthur Feb 4th, 2007 at 10:32 am
“Perhaps my n00b is showing, but did Soldier of God strike anyone else as being fake?”
.
Well considering this
@Soldier of God Feb 3rd, 2007 at 9:20 pm
“The soldier of god not only leaves the site with an involuntary eye twitch and a new fear of oars, but has also gained an utter defeat, and a realization of the courage it actually takes to serve his imaginary god and says: ‘Fuck it. Jesus sucks.’ And he lived happily ever after.
RAmen.”
I’d say you are on the right track :)
RAmen
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Alchemist -
Feb 4th, 2007
@Bill. Oh yes! Often. I’ve always posted as Alchemist here (seriously) but I’ve been invited into a couple of inner sanctums recently. It is uncomfortable though and hard to keep up. Still, the only way to truly defeat your foe is to become him!
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Lolli Popoff -
Feb 4th, 2007
Alchemist Feb 4th, 2007 at 12:33 pm
@Bill. Oh yes! Often. I’ve always posted as Alchemist here (seriously) but I’ve been invited into a couple of inner sanctums recently. It is uncomfortable though and hard to keep up. Still, the only way to truly defeat your foe is to become him!
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Your not fooling Alchemist.
Sometimes I gag at my own replies in that situation.
Praise the Lord! Brother Fruit Loop!
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Jean Bart -
Feb 4th, 2007
@TrueBeliever “@Jean Bart whats wrong with that thread?”
Nothing, only Pixel Pop was complaining that it was getting too long, and taking too much time to load.
RAmen to you Pirates!
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Wench Beth -
Feb 4th, 2007
I think there are a handful of “fake fundies” here. Just trying to liven up the atmosphere. Nothing wrong with that, in my opinion. I get a good laugh, that’s for sure!
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bill tomlinson -
Feb 4th, 2007
When I first cam here I was warned to not post my real name, so I went away and became qualo for a few posts. It wasn’t much fun for some reason. Had to come back as me. If they want to come after me, so be it.
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Alchemist -
Feb 4th, 2007
Bill. Any joy with the students? (I mean in getting them to come here, not in the “you’re sacked kinda way :))
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bill tomlinson -
Feb 4th, 2007
@Alchemist
It’s going to be interesting to see if any do look at the posts. I didn’t tell them to do anything but check out the site. It would have been better, I suppose, if I’d used an alternate name, but I suspect none will get this far. Any of my students here?
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Wench Beth -
Feb 5th, 2007
What do you teach, Bill?
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Kentuckian -
Feb 5th, 2007
LOL….read over that again. Soldier of god is none other than…..ME! muhahahaha!
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bill tomlinson -
Feb 5th, 2007
@Wench Beth
I teach first and second year philosophy at a university in southern california. (Mostly logic)
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Wench Beth -
Feb 6th, 2007
To Bill Tomlinson… which university? Because one of them is (one of my) alma maters!
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bill -
Feb 7th, 2007
@Wench Beth
CSU Northridge
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Wench Beth -
Feb 7th, 2007
Ah, Cal State Northridge, a noble place… about half way between my two schools. Well, congrats for being a teacher in the first place — I think it is one of the most valuable professions on earth and all of you should get raises. Teachers are going to save the planet if anyone is :)
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bill -
Feb 7th, 2007
@Wench Beth
This is my best semester in a long time. I’m stimulated from this site and it really sparks some improvisation and spontaneity. I entertain myself and entertain and educate students in the process. I’ve got them talking. Even though I get good ratings, most semesters they just look at me with blank stares.
Thanks guys
P.S. Only one student came to this site and he didn’t get on any threads.
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Red DutchPasta Kidd -
Feb 8th, 2007
They don’t know what they are missing! Great company, intelligent conversation, promises of beervolcanoes, lots of wenches and pirates, who, as everyone knows are far more atractive than average;)
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Wench Beth -
Feb 8th, 2007
To Red DutchPasta Kidd… Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum to that!! So how do we get Bill’s students to the site without giving away his identity? Let’s see… college students… free beer, free beer, and free beer. Hmmm… gotta work on that one, I guess :)
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bill -
Feb 9th, 2007
@Wench Beth
Good concept but hard to be a motivator if the first don’t get to the site. You think I ought to mention free beer in my class?
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Wench Beth -
Feb 11th, 2007
No, if you don’t want to lose your job. I had a high school teacher, however, that invited his older students to a party at his house and they had free beer and other items that one might smoke, if you get my drift. He didn’t lose his job, so…. food for thought, anyway.
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Storm Petrel -
Feb 14th, 2007
Or some anonymous flyers perhaps? You can’t get introuble f they don’t know it was you
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The FSM loves you -
Feb 14th, 2007
Seamus Heaney and my dad and his professor got drunk. If only THEY had realized the CoFSM…
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bill -
Feb 14th, 2007
@Wench Beth
I knew a professor who was teaching a class in ’society and sex’. He had labs and parties and did lose his job.
An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
That looks like my bathroom! hahaha
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Oh, so THAT’s how fundies see FSM. That explains their worries and subsequent hatemails…
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Wow the FSM is multiplying.
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OMFSM^(^_^)^
They look so cute!
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More proof that FSM loves lame dancers. Now I can guiltlessly join a congo line.
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Is that like an FSM daisy chain?
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Everyone loves to join a congo line! *dances* GO FSM!
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is someone mass producing statues of the FSM for worship? if so, i want one!
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I think it’s an FSM DNA strand. What do you think?
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Whaaaat? Why don’t I have one?
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Proof that FSM condones cloning research!
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Hey does anyone know if we kan put our FSM piks onto that new flickr thingy?
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I’m sure it’s possible, Keptain, but i bet it’s a random feed from pictures tagged as FSM or something.
As for the plushies… I can’t wait to see TY take them on as the next Sketti Babies
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Oh, cute! Where can I get one??
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Kaptain Jimmy…
There are free flickr accounts, just go to their main site to find out how to sign up, then you can put whatever photos you like up, tag them FSM and they might come up – there are quite a few already though if you do a search.
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Wow, now everyone can have their own personal FSM!!!
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Okay, okay, I’m sorry, I just couldn’t resist. So sue me. :]
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So who made these adorable FSM’s? And how can we all get one? Anyone, anyone?
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The Flying Spaghetti Monsters you see in the photo above are pins that I made for an art show last year.
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-Lolli Popoff; Jan 31st, 2007 at 6:33 pm: “Is that like an FSM daisy chain?”
What would be cool is to have one of those Hawaiin flower thingies you put round your neck made of the FSM plushies. :)
So will somebody ever say where I can get one of these? I need to build a shrine and all I have so far is some dry pasta and a tube of tomato pureé…
…RAmen…
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I did a short write-up on how to make these… I’ll add illustrated instructions later.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/firevixen/106676847/in/set-72057594053571100/
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@ hexhunter—”…Hawaiin flower thingies…”
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They’re known as leis, or a lei (pronounced layz, or a lay).
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what are these things??
whtever they are, i want one.
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I can imagine those FSMmies dangling above my dashboard. Time to put away the St. Christopher, hahahahaha!
RAmen to you Pirates!
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hello
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There are too many comments to spew them all out at once, so I’ll just go with the first ones that come to mind.
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How does the FSM feel about worshipping graven images? The Catholics changed the rules of Christianity to allow it, but does Pastafarianism have such rules in place to start with?
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“WE ARE LEGION!!!”
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This is what we’d have if Bush hadn’t vetoed that damned stem cell research bill…
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Shieph Buoyardi has been hard at work in his underground lair, waiting, plotting… now, it’s TIME TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!
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Bum-ba-bum-ba-bum-BA! (congo line tune)
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On a completely unrelated note, his Noodly Goodness has decided to bless my area with a little snow this morning; it subsequently turned to rain, but nonetheless, a show of goodwill for the ECU Pirates.
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Nevermind on the “graven images” one; the Gospel clearly has instructions on making simulcrums.
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*shamed*
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Mozillagrrl ROCKS! Make a trillion of them and sell them to all the worshippers!
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@Mozillagrrl
Think you could post instructions on how to make those? I’d be willing to write a song about you if you did…
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Chorus:
A trillion little FSMs have come to us this night,
Brought to us by Mozillagrrl, who sits upon His right,
With pasta, peace, and meaty balls,
The army hears His mighty call,
And flies to…
wait a minute, you already DID post instructions! I have to start paying more attention to these things. And the bribe… *cough cough*, SONG was coming along so well…
RAmen to you!
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I have a tricky theological problem, hoping you guys can help me. I have just consumed a large bowl of sacramental spaghetti with tomato sauce, parmesan and garlic bread (and grog), but being vegetarian, I omitted the meatballs. Is this heresy? If there must be meatballs, need they be meat or can I use the fake soya ones? I would hate to offend His Noodlyness by not adequately partaking in the sacrament.
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the spaghetti shaman,
Ahhh, the proverbial question…
To eat the balls or not to eat the balls… Huuummmmm
This question his been plaguing mankind for twelve days now…
I say, go with the soy, until we get a handle on this…
Ramen
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@the spaghetti shaman
I don’t think the FSM would get angry if a vegetarian refused to eat meat, it’s common sense we’re talking about.
You’ll still get strippers and grog in the afterlife, don’t worry.
RAmen
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Pixely dude!
How about… Keeper of the Lollipops!!!
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How ’bout that?
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Yea yea!!! That kicks butt!!!!
Ramen
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Looks like “Pixel” is back by popular demand!
I know how you feel Petey, I felt naked without that word, and I quite like wearing clothes.
RAmen
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@Captain Mad John Kidd
Feb 1st, 2007 at 2:55 am
@ hexhunter—â€â€¦Hawaiin flower thingies…â€
They’re known as leis, or a lei (pronounced layz, or a lay).
.
I was visiting Hawaii, and I saw this sweet shirt that had a naked chick on the back wearing a lei and is says “I got leid”, think that’s a real nice pun.
RAmen to Hawaii and their awesome shirts!
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We have seen this site, and we are not amused.
TheOneTrueBible.com is the one true spoken word of me (God). Goest there, and tithe often.
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God, stop being so jealous all the time.
Ramen
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REALITY=GOD. STOP BEING IGNORANT IDIOTS! YOU’RE AN EMBARRASSMENT TO MANKIND AND NEED TO STOP BEING FREAKS! DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE FLYING SANDWICH MAN TOO?! DO YOU REALIZE THAT SPAGHETTI HASN’T ALWAYS EXISTED? SO, HOW CAN A SPAGHETTI MAN MAKE THE UNIVERSE? AND BEER VOLCANOES IN HEAVEN! YOU’RE ALL JUST GOING TO REGRET YOUR DENIAL OF GOD. ALSO, WHOEVER DREW THE PICTURE OF THE IDIOTIC AND FAKE NOODLE GUY: YOU SPELLED “MIDGET” WRONG!
-YOU HAVE PROBLEMS.
HELP THE PSYCHIATRISTS MAKE MONEY…
GO TO THEM FOR HELP.
FREAKS!
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hm, someone else that has issues w/the cap locks
since when does reality=god? and why is that on this thread, not “youre going to hell”?
.
another person w/a fake link
:(
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@NOT AN IDIOT
You seem to suffer a lack of reality and self awareness.
You are, in fact, an ignorant loud mouthed idiot I’d say. Lot of comment from one who can’t even find the caps key. Grow a brain.
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A local exhibiting desperation for some attention?
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Not an idiot, and yet the definition of the word “satire” somehow eludes him…
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Maybe NOT AN IDIOT is just a cute name: He plainly IS an idiot.
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This army looks like the representation of the FSM in reiterated fractal budding. The FSM exists in all the many dimensions of the multiverse!!
RAmen
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Total IDIOT.
Thump wants to be your bitch.
I think your sexy myself, I think it’s your good spelling that alures me.
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@NOT AN IDIOT
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Whoop, whoop, would you like me to wrap that for you? Mine’s a pound of cabbages please Sir and don’t hold the Dodo.
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Back off Alchemist!
I saw her first!
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@Lolli – I’ll fight you for her!
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From shore to shore with an oar?
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Hey, you guys, is that all a gal has to do to impress you? TYPE IN ALL CAPS? GEEZ.
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Oy Popoff. You and me, outside! Bring your oars!
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Saucy. You trying to split lolli and me up!
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Oh, Saucy.
I thought you knew we loved you?
Shoot I’m sorry, I just thought you knew.
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I don’t want to ruin a good thing. You guys go ahead with whatever you were doing with the oars. I don’t want to know any more about it.
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*Of course I know I’m loved. Who wouldn’t love a saucy wench who can use the words mitochondria and event horizon in the same day? I think I love myself.
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@SaucyWench:
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You don’t have to type in caps to impress me!! Those other guys can have NOT AN IDIOT (with their oars).
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@ “NOT AN IDIOT”
The caps are in place for what I think are obvious reasons. Anyway…
.
“REALITY=GOD.”
I could see if you said “God = real” or something, but the way you worded it is odd, since in your mythology Lucifer is part of reality, and by your equation Lucifer is part of God directly.
“STOP BEING IGNORANT IDIOTS! YOU’RE AN EMBARRASSMENT TO MANKIND AND NEED TO STOP BEING FREAKS!”
All of this is said by the guy coming to speak against the one true religion, in all caps, with a broken link to try and make another insult at us (read where it’s supposed to take you). Not impressed.
“DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE FLYING SANDWICH MAN TOO?!”
No, because that’s simply ridiculous; there’s no evidence of such a thing!
“DO YOU REALIZE THAT SPAGHETTI HASN’T ALWAYS EXISTED?”
Um, obviously it has. Just because man hadn’t discovered it doesn’t mean it didn’t exist. There’s too many analogies throughout scientific history, so I’ll narrow it down to telling you to think about heliocentric theory, Einstein’s theory of relativity, and radioactive decay; just because we didn’t discover these things until fairly recently doesn’t mean they didn’t exist.
“SO, HOW CAN A SPAGHETTI MAN MAKE THE UNIVERSE?”
The same way an old bearded fart can; with omnipotence.
“AND BEER VOLCANOES IN HEAVEN!”
Omnipotence + omnibenevolence. Better than streets of gold, I’ll tell you that.
“YOU’RE ALL JUST GOING TO REGRET YOUR DENIAL OF GOD.”
Even if we were to regret it, Mark 3:29 clearly tells us “Whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven; he is guilty of an eternal sin.” Erego, your religion says we’re fucked anyway. Good thing the entire basis is an outdated, contradicting storybook, as opposed to our religion (which, as has been shown in just this post, is based on empirical evidence).
“ALSO, WHOEVER DREW THE PICTURE OF THE IDIOTIC AND FAKE NOODLE GUY: YOU SPELLED “MIDGET†WRONG!”
Oh, you’ve got us there. The entire religion will surely fall apart because of a misspelling in some of our original texts. /sarcasm
“-YOU HAVE PROBLEMS.
HELP THE PSYCHIATRISTS MAKE MONEY…
GO TO THEM FOR HELP.”
Again, says the gentleman/lady who came into the homr of the faithful with the intent of spreading his God’s love, which apparently consists of namecalling. I’m personally glad I don’t worship that petty god.
“FREAKS!”
And damned proud of it.
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IF I TYPE IN ALL CAPS, WILL I BE COOL TOO?
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Whoops… didn’t realize that was that long. Sorry all.
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That’s Ok Art!
I don’t think there is a limit to post size.
Mine are always short, but only because I’ve got short fingers.
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belive
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Is that in the Land of Enchantment?
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the “official” prophet of Albuquerque
Feb 1st, 2007 at 9:01 pm
belive
*
I am alive thank you.
*
Arthur, that was a very good post, good things to say and funny too. If you have that lenght doesn’t matter. It only matters for droning, boring fundies.
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Hmmmm… isn’t it interesting that we’re the ignorant idiots when they pride themselves on not having had a new thought in 2 millenia?
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@Rr. Corpus Callosum, Thanks. I was going to find a random, smarmy quote as a response to you, which led me to Richard Bach, and then to Douglas Adams. Then I thought that I’d start another quotefest and it might get ugly. That being said, have a great day.
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che carini! ne voglio uno per il mio altarino.
RAmen
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Time is running out on the Flying Spaghetti Monster Challenge
http://scienceantiscience.blogspot.com/2007/01/flying-spaghetti-monster-challenge.html
This is a chance for you to win a boatload of cash (albeit old Turkish lira).
Cheers
Joe Meert
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Wow, a person trying to be God.
EVERYBODY knows that the real God is the FSM. Read a book sometime. If you are the real god, smite me down with your terrible power! Go on, smite me O mighty smiter! Ask who is to be smited, and they shall be smoten!
…
ARRRGH! *falls on floor*
Nah, just kidding!
All hail the FSM!
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@NOT AN IDIOT
Everything you said retorted what your name states. By imposing tyrannical methodology with the idea of subliminal and eternal fealty to a entity of your creation is something I can’t do. It’s like giving a kid a submachine gun with no kickback…bad idea.
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That’s so cute! so lovely!!
Prease come to my home!
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To the “official†prophet of Albuquerque… who are you? Are you really in Albuquerque? If so, let’s either duel to the death or meet for lunch at Sadie’s or something.
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@ Wench Beth
Durn it, the only local Pastafarian I know is Nick the Missionary, and he seriously looks like he’d eviscerate me in a duel…
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Maybe I can challenge him to a rousing round of Guitar Hero or something where my geekitude (yes, I make up words on the spot) would give me the upper hand!
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@NOT AN IDIOT, Satire!
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@Everyone else, NOT AN IDIOT: Satire!
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Awesome, he can spell. That’s made my day. Now for the next part.
@NOT AN IDIOT: Take your finger off shift, it’s easier to type. And, of course, easier to read.
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Love the noodley bits up above.
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NOT AN IDIOT reminds me on this scene from “Monty Python’s Life Of Brian”:
BRIAN: I’m NOT THE MESSIAH! Will you please listen? I am NOT THE MESSIAH, do you understand?! Honestly!
WOMAN: Only the true Messiah denies His divinity!
Thus, only the true Idiot denies his idiocy.
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@NOT AN IDIOT
ssshhh, be vewy vewy quiet, I’m hunting fundies!
OK, folks, don’t get upset, I stole this wonderful expression from Pixel Pop in another thread. But I like it a lot, and maybe it can help to draw people from that to this thread…
RAmen to you Pirates!
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Jean – I think a few of us have been naughty boys recently :) Let’s hope it works!
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@Jean Bart
whats wrong with that thread?
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YOU IDIOTS ARE ALL GOInG TO BURN IN HELL! DON’T YOU KNOW OF ALL THE PROPHECIES IN THE BIBLE THAT HAVE COME TRUE??? DON”T YOU KNOW JESUS DIED FOR YOUR SINS! YOU DENY REALITY AND PRETEND TO BELIEVE IN SOME FSM, BUT WE ALL KNOW YOU REALLY BELIEVE IN GOD AND ARE JUST TOO ARROGANT TO ADMIT IT. I HOPE GOD HAS MERCY ON YOU…PERHAPS HE’LL SPARE YOU HELL AND JUST MAKE THE REST OF YOUR LIVES SHIT HOLES.
AS FOR ME aND MY HOUSe, WE WILL SERVE GOD!
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@Soldier of god- “aND MY HOUSe,”
Your caps lock button is on the fritz^_^
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Sorry. I came across a bit harsh, just because I really don’t want you guys to burn in hell, and it makes me angry you would throw your souls away so willingly. I’ll pray for you.
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Soldier of God, Thanks for the kind loving words.
You can now go F*** yourself, run along know.
It’s past your bedtime. Only big kids here……
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“Run along know”
Typical Atheist grammar mastery level.
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#12
F**** off now….
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Soldier of God Feb 3rd, 2007 at 8:39 pm
YOU IDIOTS ARE ALL GOInG TO BURN IN HELL! DON’T YOU KNOW OF ALL THE PROPHECIES IN THE BIBLE THAT HAVE COME TRUE??? DON’’T YOU KNOW JESUS DIED FOR YOUR SINS! YOU DENY REALITY AND PRETEND TO BELIEVE IN SOME FSM, BUT WE ALL KNOW YOU REALLY BELIEVE IN GOD AND ARE JUST TOO ARROGANT TO ADMIT IT. I HOPE GOD HAS MERCY ON YOU…PERHAPS HE’LL SPARE YOU HELL AND JUST MAKE THE REST OF YOUR LIVES SHIT HOLES.
AS FOR ME aND MY HOUSe, WE WILL SERVE GOD!
.
Times are truly hard, when I lower myself to respond to the author of this.
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K….*wack* *wack* *wack* *squirt*…i’m done F***ing off now…
So, back to the problem. All Atheists are retarded and seperated from reality and it is dangerous to their existance. I hope you guys get on the right track or your going to be severely tortured in the afterlife. God eats shit like you for breakfast.
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Hi there Soldier of God.
How are you? Have you had a good day? I have (we won the Calcutta cup – forget Jesus Wilkinson is god!) I’m full of the love of oars.
I think you’re sexy! Do you want to meet up sometime. I’ll bring the lube :)
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Mmmk…if you’re a young, attractive women I’m sure jesus can look the other way for a bit.
=P
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Hmm post loss!
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Soldier. I can always wear a wig! I’m really a lesbian trapped in a man’s body. Can jesus join in. I’ve never done the troilism but I’m game for most things!
:)
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Narrarator: And so the soldier of god backed slowly away from the Venganza.org website then thundered into a sprint for his life, forever damaged and disturbed, daring only to return in his nightmares. The soldier of god not only leaves the site with an involuntary eye twitch and a new fear of oars, but has also gained an utter defeat, and a realization of the courage it actually takes to serve his imaginary god and says: ‘Fuck it. Jesus sucks.’ And he lived happily ever after.
RAmen.
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Noooooo. Soldier, don’t go! Just change your name and writing style!
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http://youtube.com/watch?v=bTv2QJaZ2IU
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haha
Great vid Kentuckian!
I think I’ve heard that song before! What say you Alchemist?
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Does anybody remember that old sixties song…
Where have all the fundies gone… long time passing…
Where have all the fundies gone…
Sooo long ago….?
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hmmm….no. I wasn’t born till the 90’s tho :/ .
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WHO THE FLICK IS VIACOM INTERNATIONAL!!! Sons of bitches deleted the video. Who gave them the right to keep that song from everyone. FSM will pour his wrath on them…
Grrr…
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..ok, it’ back…that was wierd.
that FSM army looks pretty kool. where can I get one of those squishy, lovable little toys?
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Viacom owns a bunch of tv stations (comedy central and nick included) and they made YouTube take there videos off today. It was in the New York Times today
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I’m surprised all the people who haven’t been enlightened by FSM didn’t molotov their headquarters. Viacom doing stuff like that when at least half the people in the U.S. watch a youtube video everyday. Shame on them. Oh well, FSM would teach forgiveness.
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“YOU IDIOTS ARE ALL GOInG TO BURN IN HELL! DON’T YOU KNOW OF ALL THE PROPHECIES IN THE BIBLE THAT HAVE COME TRUE??? DON’’T YOU KNOW JESUS DIED FOR YOUR SINS! YOU DENY REALITY AND PRETEND TO BELIEVE IN SOME FSM, BUT WE ALL KNOW YOU REALLY BELIEVE IN GOD AND ARE JUST TOO ARROGANT TO ADMIT IT. I HOPE GOD HAS MERCY ON YOU…PERHAPS HE’LL SPARE YOU HELL AND JUST MAKE THE REST OF YOUR LIVES SHIT HOLES.
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AS FOR ME aND MY HOUSe, WE WILL SERVE GOD”
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Using the patented F**kwit Finder;
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Capitalized handle; Negative.
Overuse of capslock; Check.
Alternating upper/lower case; Check.
Incorrect grammar; Check.
Incorrect spelling; Negative (amazingly).
Threats of burning in hell, divine vengeance, etc; Check.
Lowbrow insults; Check.
Lowbrow insults of our god; Half-check (”SOME FSM”! The FSM more like).
Accusations of homosexuality; Negative.
Threats of rape, physical violence, oars, etc; Negative.
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Scored 5.5
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4-6: A Nitwit; Likely seeking attention, may not necessarily mean to irritate, but is not aware of proper forum etiquette, and so comes across badly. With patient counselling, and the occasional application of a large blunt object, subject may be cured.
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i must say…..
crazy awsome…
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Perhaps my n00b is showing, but did Soldier of God strike anyone else as being fake? Something about him just didn’t quite sit right with me… he played the part of the fundy TOO well.
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Maybe it’s just my imagination, or my lingering hope for mankind that people don’t sink that low in the name of their religion.
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@Arthur
You think anyone ever, from lack of fundys, decides to play the role of fundy to stimulate? I thought of it but it would be an uncomfortable and probably boring, unless you could say something really different.
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It’s either a real fundie, but one with some intelligence. Or it is a fake one, maybe just someone who came here and decided what he/she could do with some FSM-baiting. See if anyone would bite?
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@Arthur Feb 4th, 2007 at 10:32 am
“Perhaps my n00b is showing, but did Soldier of God strike anyone else as being fake?”
.
Well considering this
@Soldier of God Feb 3rd, 2007 at 9:20 pm
“The soldier of god not only leaves the site with an involuntary eye twitch and a new fear of oars, but has also gained an utter defeat, and a realization of the courage it actually takes to serve his imaginary god and says: ‘Fuck it. Jesus sucks.’ And he lived happily ever after.
RAmen.”
I’d say you are on the right track :)
RAmen
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@Bill. Oh yes! Often. I’ve always posted as Alchemist here (seriously) but I’ve been invited into a couple of inner sanctums recently. It is uncomfortable though and hard to keep up. Still, the only way to truly defeat your foe is to become him!
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Alchemist Feb 4th, 2007 at 12:33 pm
@Bill. Oh yes! Often. I’ve always posted as Alchemist here (seriously) but I’ve been invited into a couple of inner sanctums recently. It is uncomfortable though and hard to keep up. Still, the only way to truly defeat your foe is to become him!
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Your not fooling Alchemist.
Sometimes I gag at my own replies in that situation.
Praise the Lord! Brother Fruit Loop!
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@TrueBeliever “@Jean Bart whats wrong with that thread?”
Nothing, only Pixel Pop was complaining that it was getting too long, and taking too much time to load.
RAmen to you Pirates!
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I think there are a handful of “fake fundies” here. Just trying to liven up the atmosphere. Nothing wrong with that, in my opinion. I get a good laugh, that’s for sure!
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When I first cam here I was warned to not post my real name, so I went away and became qualo for a few posts. It wasn’t much fun for some reason. Had to come back as me. If they want to come after me, so be it.
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Bill. Any joy with the students? (I mean in getting them to come here, not in the “you’re sacked kinda way :))
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@Alchemist
It’s going to be interesting to see if any do look at the posts. I didn’t tell them to do anything but check out the site. It would have been better, I suppose, if I’d used an alternate name, but I suspect none will get this far. Any of my students here?
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What do you teach, Bill?
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LOL….read over that again. Soldier of god is none other than…..ME! muhahahaha!
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@Wench Beth
I teach first and second year philosophy at a university in southern california. (Mostly logic)
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To Bill Tomlinson… which university? Because one of them is (one of my) alma maters!
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@Wench Beth
CSU Northridge
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Ah, Cal State Northridge, a noble place… about half way between my two schools. Well, congrats for being a teacher in the first place — I think it is one of the most valuable professions on earth and all of you should get raises. Teachers are going to save the planet if anyone is :)
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@Wench Beth
This is my best semester in a long time. I’m stimulated from this site and it really sparks some improvisation and spontaneity. I entertain myself and entertain and educate students in the process. I’ve got them talking. Even though I get good ratings, most semesters they just look at me with blank stares.
Thanks guys
P.S. Only one student came to this site and he didn’t get on any threads.
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They don’t know what they are missing! Great company, intelligent conversation, promises of beervolcanoes, lots of wenches and pirates, who, as everyone knows are far more atractive than average;)
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To Red DutchPasta Kidd… Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum to that!! So how do we get Bill’s students to the site without giving away his identity? Let’s see… college students… free beer, free beer, and free beer. Hmmm… gotta work on that one, I guess :)
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@Wench Beth
Good concept but hard to be a motivator if the first don’t get to the site. You think I ought to mention free beer in my class?
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No, if you don’t want to lose your job. I had a high school teacher, however, that invited his older students to a party at his house and they had free beer and other items that one might smoke, if you get my drift. He didn’t lose his job, so…. food for thought, anyway.
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Or some anonymous flyers perhaps? You can’t get introuble f they don’t know it was you
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Seamus Heaney and my dad and his professor got drunk. If only THEY had realized the CoFSM…
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@Wench Beth
I knew a professor who was teaching a class in ’society and sex’. He had labs and parties and did lose his job.
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