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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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Miscellaneous
Bobby's Blog
Contact Bobby: Contact Me
From shore to shore with an oar?
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Hey, you guys, is that all a gal has to do to impress you? TYPE IN ALL CAPS? GEEZ.
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Oy Popoff. You and me, outside! Bring your oars!
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Saucy. You trying to split lolli and me up!
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Oh, Saucy.
I thought you knew we loved you?
Shoot I’m sorry, I just thought you knew.
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I don’t want to ruin a good thing. You guys go ahead with whatever you were doing with the oars. I don’t want to know any more about it.
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*Of course I know I’m loved. Who wouldn’t love a saucy wench who can use the words mitochondria and event horizon in the same day? I think I love myself.
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@SaucyWench:
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You don’t have to type in caps to impress me!! Those other guys can have NOT AN IDIOT (with their oars).
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@ “NOT AN IDIOT”
The caps are in place for what I think are obvious reasons. Anyway…
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“REALITY=GOD.”
I could see if you said “God = real” or something, but the way you worded it is odd, since in your mythology Lucifer is part of reality, and by your equation Lucifer is part of God directly.
“STOP BEING IGNORANT IDIOTS! YOU’RE AN EMBARRASSMENT TO MANKIND AND NEED TO STOP BEING FREAKS!”
All of this is said by the guy coming to speak against the one true religion, in all caps, with a broken link to try and make another insult at us (read where it’s supposed to take you). Not impressed.
“DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE FLYING SANDWICH MAN TOO?!”
No, because that’s simply ridiculous; there’s no evidence of such a thing!
“DO YOU REALIZE THAT SPAGHETTI HASN’T ALWAYS EXISTED?”
Um, obviously it has. Just because man hadn’t discovered it doesn’t mean it didn’t exist. There’s too many analogies throughout scientific history, so I’ll narrow it down to telling you to think about heliocentric theory, Einstein’s theory of relativity, and radioactive decay; just because we didn’t discover these things until fairly recently doesn’t mean they didn’t exist.
“SO, HOW CAN A SPAGHETTI MAN MAKE THE UNIVERSE?”
The same way an old bearded fart can; with omnipotence.
“AND BEER VOLCANOES IN HEAVEN!”
Omnipotence + omnibenevolence. Better than streets of gold, I’ll tell you that.
“YOU’RE ALL JUST GOING TO REGRET YOUR DENIAL OF GOD.”
Even if we were to regret it, Mark 3:29 clearly tells us “Whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven; he is guilty of an eternal sin.” Erego, your religion says we’re fucked anyway. Good thing the entire basis is an outdated, contradicting storybook, as opposed to our religion (which, as has been shown in just this post, is based on empirical evidence).
“ALSO, WHOEVER DREW THE PICTURE OF THE IDIOTIC AND FAKE NOODLE GUY: YOU SPELLED “MIDGET†WRONG!”
Oh, you’ve got us there. The entire religion will surely fall apart because of a misspelling in some of our original texts. /sarcasm
“-YOU HAVE PROBLEMS.
HELP THE PSYCHIATRISTS MAKE MONEY…
GO TO THEM FOR HELP.”
Again, says the gentleman/lady who came into the homr of the faithful with the intent of spreading his God’s love, which apparently consists of namecalling. I’m personally glad I don’t worship that petty god.
“FREAKS!”
And damned proud of it.
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IF I TYPE IN ALL CAPS, WILL I BE COOL TOO?
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Whoops… didn’t realize that was that long. Sorry all.
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That’s Ok Art!
I don’t think there is a limit to post size.
Mine are always short, but only because I’ve got short fingers.
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belive
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Is that in the Land of Enchantment?
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the “official” prophet of Albuquerque
Feb 1st, 2007 at 9:01 pm
belive
*
I am alive thank you.
*
Arthur, that was a very good post, good things to say and funny too. If you have that lenght doesn’t matter. It only matters for droning, boring fundies.
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Hmmmm… isn’t it interesting that we’re the ignorant idiots when they pride themselves on not having had a new thought in 2 millenia?
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@Rr. Corpus Callosum, Thanks. I was going to find a random, smarmy quote as a response to you, which led me to Richard Bach, and then to Douglas Adams. Then I thought that I’d start another quotefest and it might get ugly. That being said, have a great day.
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che carini! ne voglio uno per il mio altarino.
RAmen
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Time is running out on the Flying Spaghetti Monster Challenge
http://scienceantiscience.blogspot.com/2007/01/flying-spaghetti-monster-challenge.html
This is a chance for you to win a boatload of cash (albeit old Turkish lira).
Cheers
Joe Meert
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Wow, a person trying to be God.
EVERYBODY knows that the real God is the FSM. Read a book sometime. If you are the real god, smite me down with your terrible power! Go on, smite me O mighty smiter! Ask who is to be smited, and they shall be smoten!
…
ARRRGH! *falls on floor*
Nah, just kidding!
All hail the FSM!
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@NOT AN IDIOT
Everything you said retorted what your name states. By imposing tyrannical methodology with the idea of subliminal and eternal fealty to a entity of your creation is something I can’t do. It’s like giving a kid a submachine gun with no kickback…bad idea.
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That’s so cute! so lovely!!
Prease come to my home!
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To the “official†prophet of Albuquerque… who are you? Are you really in Albuquerque? If so, let’s either duel to the death or meet for lunch at Sadie’s or something.
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@ Wench Beth
Durn it, the only local Pastafarian I know is Nick the Missionary, and he seriously looks like he’d eviscerate me in a duel…
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Maybe I can challenge him to a rousing round of Guitar Hero or something where my geekitude (yes, I make up words on the spot) would give me the upper hand!
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@NOT AN IDIOT, Satire!
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@Everyone else, NOT AN IDIOT: Satire!
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Awesome, he can spell. That’s made my day. Now for the next part.
@NOT AN IDIOT: Take your finger off shift, it’s easier to type. And, of course, easier to read.
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Love the noodley bits up above.
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NOT AN IDIOT reminds me on this scene from “Monty Python’s Life Of Brian”:
BRIAN: I’m NOT THE MESSIAH! Will you please listen? I am NOT THE MESSIAH, do you understand?! Honestly!
WOMAN: Only the true Messiah denies His divinity!
Thus, only the true Idiot denies his idiocy.
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@NOT AN IDIOT
ssshhh, be vewy vewy quiet, I’m hunting fundies!
OK, folks, don’t get upset, I stole this wonderful expression from Pixel Pop in another thread. But I like it a lot, and maybe it can help to draw people from that to this thread…
RAmen to you Pirates!
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Jean – I think a few of us have been naughty boys recently :) Let’s hope it works!
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@Jean Bart
whats wrong with that thread?
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YOU IDIOTS ARE ALL GOInG TO BURN IN HELL! DON’T YOU KNOW OF ALL THE PROPHECIES IN THE BIBLE THAT HAVE COME TRUE??? DON”T YOU KNOW JESUS DIED FOR YOUR SINS! YOU DENY REALITY AND PRETEND TO BELIEVE IN SOME FSM, BUT WE ALL KNOW YOU REALLY BELIEVE IN GOD AND ARE JUST TOO ARROGANT TO ADMIT IT. I HOPE GOD HAS MERCY ON YOU…PERHAPS HE’LL SPARE YOU HELL AND JUST MAKE THE REST OF YOUR LIVES SHIT HOLES.
AS FOR ME aND MY HOUSe, WE WILL SERVE GOD!
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@Soldier of god- “aND MY HOUSe,”
Your caps lock button is on the fritz^_^
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Sorry. I came across a bit harsh, just because I really don’t want you guys to burn in hell, and it makes me angry you would throw your souls away so willingly. I’ll pray for you.
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Soldier of God, Thanks for the kind loving words.
You can now go F*** yourself, run along know.
It’s past your bedtime. Only big kids here……
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“Run along know”
Typical Atheist grammar mastery level.
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#12
F**** off now….
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Soldier of God Feb 3rd, 2007 at 8:39 pm
YOU IDIOTS ARE ALL GOInG TO BURN IN HELL! DON’T YOU KNOW OF ALL THE PROPHECIES IN THE BIBLE THAT HAVE COME TRUE??? DON’’T YOU KNOW JESUS DIED FOR YOUR SINS! YOU DENY REALITY AND PRETEND TO BELIEVE IN SOME FSM, BUT WE ALL KNOW YOU REALLY BELIEVE IN GOD AND ARE JUST TOO ARROGANT TO ADMIT IT. I HOPE GOD HAS MERCY ON YOU…PERHAPS HE’LL SPARE YOU HELL AND JUST MAKE THE REST OF YOUR LIVES SHIT HOLES.
AS FOR ME aND MY HOUSe, WE WILL SERVE GOD!
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Times are truly hard, when I lower myself to respond to the author of this.
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K….*wack* *wack* *wack* *squirt*…i’m done F***ing off now…
So, back to the problem. All Atheists are retarded and seperated from reality and it is dangerous to their existance. I hope you guys get on the right track or your going to be severely tortured in the afterlife. God eats shit like you for breakfast.
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Hi there Soldier of God.
How are you? Have you had a good day? I have (we won the Calcutta cup – forget Jesus Wilkinson is god!) I’m full of the love of oars.
I think you’re sexy! Do you want to meet up sometime. I’ll bring the lube :)
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Mmmk…if you’re a young, attractive women I’m sure jesus can look the other way for a bit.
=P
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Hmm post loss!
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Soldier. I can always wear a wig! I’m really a lesbian trapped in a man’s body. Can jesus join in. I’ve never done the troilism but I’m game for most things!
:)
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Narrarator: And so the soldier of god backed slowly away from the Venganza.org website then thundered into a sprint for his life, forever damaged and disturbed, daring only to return in his nightmares. The soldier of god not only leaves the site with an involuntary eye twitch and a new fear of oars, but has also gained an utter defeat, and a realization of the courage it actually takes to serve his imaginary god and says: ‘Fuck it. Jesus sucks.’ And he lived happily ever after.
RAmen.
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Noooooo. Soldier, don’t go! Just change your name and writing style!
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http://youtube.com/watch?v=bTv2QJaZ2IU
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haha
Great vid Kentuckian!
I think I’ve heard that song before! What say you Alchemist?
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Does anybody remember that old sixties song…
Where have all the fundies gone… long time passing…
Where have all the fundies gone…
Sooo long ago….?
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hmmm….no. I wasn’t born till the 90’s tho :/ .
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WHO THE FLICK IS VIACOM INTERNATIONAL!!! Sons of bitches deleted the video. Who gave them the right to keep that song from everyone. FSM will pour his wrath on them…
Grrr…
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..ok, it’ back…that was wierd.
that FSM army looks pretty kool. where can I get one of those squishy, lovable little toys?
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Viacom owns a bunch of tv stations (comedy central and nick included) and they made YouTube take there videos off today. It was in the New York Times today
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I’m surprised all the people who haven’t been enlightened by FSM didn’t molotov their headquarters. Viacom doing stuff like that when at least half the people in the U.S. watch a youtube video everyday. Shame on them. Oh well, FSM would teach forgiveness.
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“YOU IDIOTS ARE ALL GOInG TO BURN IN HELL! DON’T YOU KNOW OF ALL THE PROPHECIES IN THE BIBLE THAT HAVE COME TRUE??? DON’’T YOU KNOW JESUS DIED FOR YOUR SINS! YOU DENY REALITY AND PRETEND TO BELIEVE IN SOME FSM, BUT WE ALL KNOW YOU REALLY BELIEVE IN GOD AND ARE JUST TOO ARROGANT TO ADMIT IT. I HOPE GOD HAS MERCY ON YOU…PERHAPS HE’LL SPARE YOU HELL AND JUST MAKE THE REST OF YOUR LIVES SHIT HOLES.
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AS FOR ME aND MY HOUSe, WE WILL SERVE GOD”
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Using the patented F**kwit Finder;
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Capitalized handle; Negative.
Overuse of capslock; Check.
Alternating upper/lower case; Check.
Incorrect grammar; Check.
Incorrect spelling; Negative (amazingly).
Threats of burning in hell, divine vengeance, etc; Check.
Lowbrow insults; Check.
Lowbrow insults of our god; Half-check (”SOME FSM”! The FSM more like).
Accusations of homosexuality; Negative.
Threats of rape, physical violence, oars, etc; Negative.
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Scored 5.5
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4-6: A Nitwit; Likely seeking attention, may not necessarily mean to irritate, but is not aware of proper forum etiquette, and so comes across badly. With patient counselling, and the occasional application of a large blunt object, subject may be cured.
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i must say…..
crazy awsome…
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