hello. I came across your so call WEBSITE as a mistake. ok, I have one question for you. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? How can you honestly believe that spaghetti can have legs, arms, and a pulse at the least bit? Your web site is clearly a joke, and anybody that believes a “thing” can have MEATBALLS for eyes, is clearly disturbed and should seek help immediately. How can you people make such vulgar comments about the catholic and Christian religion? saying that we have to accept that God’s balls are larger than ours? that is clearly disrespectful to all Christians. If you wish to disrespect me, i will disrespect you, by saying that you are all a bunch of LOONS with mental disabilities. Worshiping spaghetti is like worshipping Poland just because they make good water! Oh, and one last thing. tomorrow night, while i am enjoying my wonderful plate of spaghetti, ill make sure i enjoy it. But, you can give me a call next time you see the flying spaghetti monster. I would give you my number, but I can guarantee you wont need it.
-e.f.
what the hell is wrong with you
Published by Bobby Henderson January 30th, 2007 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 402 Comments
402 Responses to “what the hell is wrong with you”
Nothing is wrong with me, but thanks for asking.
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Can you please learn some grammar? Oh, and give me your phone number — I have UNDENIABLE proof of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
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-e.f.
.
Only two things I’ve got to say…
1. Back up off of Poland! Some of my best Polish friends, came from there!
2. Your grammar sucks tootsie rolls!
That’s all for now,
peace, love,
Ramen
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“How can you honestly believe that spaghetti can have legs, arms, and a pulse at the least bit? Your web site is clearly a joke, and anybody that believes a “thing†can have MEATBALLS for eyes, is clearly disturbed and should seek help immediately.”
WTF..are you halucinating -e.f.?
What arms and legs?
The FSM doesn’t have meatballs for eyes. Honestly, tell us what drugs are you on?
The FSM has Noodles and balls, as well as eyes!
You certainly are a strange one e.f. I’d get off the halucinogenics if I were you, as continued use may lead to psychological disturbances. Hmm…advice is obviously already too late!
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To eat the FSM is to worship the FSM.
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what the hell is wrong with you
hello. I came across your so called BELIEF in Jesus as a mistake. ok, I have one question for you. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? How can you honestly believe that a man with a beard can create all of mankind 6,000 years ago the least bit? Your religion is clearly a joke, and anybody that believes a “man with a beard†can have ocular glands for eyes, is clearly disturbed and should seek help immediately. How can you people make such vulgar comments about the Pastafarian religion? saying that we have to accept that (your) God’s balls are larger than ours? that is clearly disrespectful to all Pastafarians. If you wish to disrespect me, i will disrespect you, by saying that you are all a bunch of LOONS with mental disabilities. Worshiping Jesus is like worshipping Poland just because they make good water! Oh, and one last thing. tomorrow night, while i am enjoying my wonderful plate of bread and wine, ill make sure i enjoy it. But, you can give me a call next time you see the God that you speak of. I would give you my number, but I can guarantee you wont need it.
tha beast from tha east
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ZING!
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No stripper factories or beer volcanoes for him.
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I see your capability to understand SARCASM is limited. I wish you the best of luck in life – you have major limitations upon your chances to succeed.
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Please feel free to provide any evidence that Christianity, Judism, Islam, Roman Gods, Greek Gods, Native American Indian Gods, etc, etc, etc is any more believable than a Flying Spaghetti Monster.
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I will pray for your soul when I consume my next bowl of pasta.
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To tha beast from the east… OH YEAH BABE! RAMEN TO YOU!! Couldn’t have been said better. Sock it to ‘em!!
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@tha beast from tha east
RAmen!
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You are absolutely right, e.f. cummings. I cannot believe these people! Can you imagine that they actually believe this shit? Unreal! I think that people this stupid deserve what they get, don’t you, e.f.? Let them rot in hell, I say. Rot, rot, rot! Pass the Jack Daniels.
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I was curling, the other day, and I explained to my friend, Scott, that the cause of global warming was the lack of pirates. He told me that there was no evidence of global warming, and that things were ment to get hotter over time. I quickly shuffled a way, and threw my shot, later learning that he is a Christian religious fanatic.
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Well, there goes another Republican Retard.
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Today in the weather: Looks like a little bit of unexpected hate-mail, but don’t worry because the trollings gone down a lot so the roads should clear up nicely. Just for safety though, be sure to remember your witty comebacks if you plan on going outside!
This weather report is presented by: WhoopiCozTShat, one helluva tough super hero
RAmen
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i wonder if jesus’s followersgot alot of hate mail when they started a new religon? Just because our religon started off just a little late, dosen’t mean that ours is any worse or better then yours. RAmen
~The Red Headed One
P.S. beast from the east you rock!!!
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Where can I procure this mystical “Polish Water” as I have been on a great quest as to the appropriate tipple to accompany the sacred feast??
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@St Gumbert I don’t know, but I believe somewhere in Germany
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@St Gumbert
Poland Spring is in Maine, dunno if the water there is really Polish or not though.
I would assume one could find “Polish water” in Poland, but I’m not so sure about this “Polish Water”, which gets an extra special capsing.
I think I peed Ukrainian Water once, but that’s not special.
From the mouth of a helluva tough super-hero
RAmen
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“He told me that there was no evidence of global warming, and that things were ment to get hotter over time. I quickly shuffled a way, and threw my shot”
while that was a very good way to handle the situation! however, you should have pointed out that even if we are supposed to heat up, we are still heating up
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beast from the east, that was true Pastafarian spirit.
.
As for the Maine-borne Polish Water: that’s from the same people who decided to make Swedish fish in CANADA. I mean, nothing against you hip, coolio, something-or-other(lame excuse) Canadians, but Swedish=from Sweden; they aren’t called Canadi…ish Fish, find your own animals to immortalize in candy.
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As far as any water goes.
Everybody knows there is only one true water!
That is… My Jesus Christ Almighty… Mighty… Miracle water…
I haven’t pushed it lately, because the regulars here all have a supply.
However, I see a need tonite… Buy Some of my Miracle water… It’s on sale this week…
Buy some… get some for free….
.
Peter Popoff… seller of Miracles…
Ramen
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Oh ho ho. That was enlightening. I think I have just lost any remaining respect for Christian fanatics all over. Dear me that was fun. Honestly, do you have ANY proof (except for a really old book) that God exists? Also, there have been studies to show that Jesus was a drug-pusher. Yep. He gave his followers mushrooms to make them see miracles. HA! Pwn’d.
Fo sho, you are a fool.
Gimme proof and I shall applaud you.
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“and I explained to my friend, Scott, that the cause of global warming was the lack of pirates.”
RAmen. I have undeniable proof! Today, right after I put on my amazingly piratical boots, found it was a mere 12 degrees outside. Unfortunatly, the bus heater wasn’t working and I nearly lost the feet with said boots.
@Poster- Can you say “hypocrite”?
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@Lolli Popoff- *gasp* Only the original Popoff is allowed to sell that holliest of holy water in which we boil the pasta. Unless he has given you permission? By the way, your name freakin rocks^_^
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Dread Wench L’TUAE
hahahaha,
.
I am Peter L’TUAE.
I had one of them things that said… change your name!
Thanks!
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Somebody mention ’shrooms? (Pavlovian response #3)
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Dread Wench – I think Lolli Popoff is much sweeter than Peter, hahaha.
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Alchemist Jan 30th, 2007 at 6:52 pm
Somebody mention ’shrooms?
.
hahahaha
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Ahhh! sorry Peter! I totally missed that. my opticle meatballs must be on the fritz.
Why did he say meatballs are the eyes? He clearly has eyestalks.
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Lolli is Peter’s wife. She is much nicer and prettier than Peter. We all love her dearly.
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I can see where they come from…a little bit. I swear, some of you post your comments in such tactless ways. “Republican Retard” and other such comments CAN be quite disrespectful. Using language that belittles others is also tasteless. I’m a Republican, I was raised Catholic, ect ect, yet I still appriciate the values of the FSM. It’s not a matter of being able to “prove” your god. It’s a matter in believing, in having faith. That’s why religeons are also known as “faiths.” Religeous fanatics, be they Pastafarian, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, ect, lose sight of this fact.
That aside, I will also argue that reality is based on perception, our world is a direct result of what we percieve it to be. How do we know that we’re not all asleep, waiting to wake up from a dream to a fantasical new world? We do not. But since we percieve this world, our reality is this. The poster views his god as God, the Pastafarians view the FMS as their god, both realities are equally valid, but only to those percieving them.
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I just hope… he has ears, if the eyes are bad.
Right Alchemist?
.
It’s all good L’TUAE, I didn’t know who I was either when I changed my name.
These things take time, for sure!
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hello. Does anyone ELSE feel that EVERYTHING THE HELL IS WRONG WITH US? Because, I don’t know about YOU, but I’m kind of PROUD of being LOON with a mental DISABILITY who seems TO have FORGOTTEN how to use THE CAPS lock. I’ve forgotten; does THE god of christianity HAVE a PULSE anyway?
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Marc McOar Jan 30th, 2007 at 7:01 pm
Lolli is Peter’s wife. She is much nicer and prettier than Peter. We all love her dearly.
.
Thanks Marc! Not quite right, but may you be forever touched!
Ramen
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Geologist Jan 30th, 2007 at 7:02 pm
I can see where they come from…a little bit. I swear, some of you post your comments in such tactless ways. “Republican Retard†and other such comments CAN be quite disrespectful. Using language that belittles others is also tasteless. I’m a Republican, I was raised Catholic, ect ect, yet I still appriciate the values of the FSM. It’s not a matter of being able to “prove†your god. It’s a matter in believing, in having faith. That’s why religeons are also known as “faiths.†Religeous fanatics, be they Pastafarian, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, ect, lose sight of this fact.
That aside, I will also argue that reality is based on perception, our world is a direct result of what we percieve it to be. How do we know that we’re not all asleep, waiting to wake up from a dream to a fantasical new world? We do not. But since we percieve this world, our reality is this. The poster views his god as God, the Pastafarians view the FMS as their god, both realities are equally valid, but only to those percieving them.
.
Crap Geologist.
I just paid you a compliment on the other thread.
But now you are saying you are a catholic republican, that respects the FSM?
Sorry pal, but thats going a bit deep.
How are you tonite Thump?
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“your so call WEBSITE”…..what else would you call it?!
-
“WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?” I DON’T KNOW, WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?
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“How can you people make such vulgar comments about the catholic and Christian religion?” 99% of the comments made here are only disrespectful if you lack a sense of humor, are a fundie, or both. The other 1%, well…hey, that’s life. Don’t agree? Argue back with some intellegence instead of ranting about it. You might not change any minds, but at least you’d be respected somewhat.
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“you are all a bunch of LOONS with mental disabilities.” Isn’t there a bird called a loon? Why would you call us birds? What did they ever do to you?
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“Worshiping spaghetti is like worshipping Poland just because they make good water!”……you do realize that poland spring water isn’t actually FOUND in POLAND, right?
–
Thanks for playing, please try again.
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Is it really necessary to copy and paste a whole post to reference it?
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If he’s going to call us birds he should have said dodo, at least they deserved the name.
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Hey, even Jesus had a sense of humor. Lighten up. And don’t insult people, Jesus doesn’t like that.
- Another Christian.
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“How can you honestly believe that spaghetti can have legs, arms, and a pulse at the least bit?”
He doesn’t has anything of that, because He doesn’t needs it.
“anybody that believes a “thing†can have MEATBALLS for eyes, is clearly disturbed and should seek help immediately.”
Appearently you didn’t note the eyestalks.
“How can you people make such vulgar comments about the catholic and Christian religion? saying that we have to accept that God’s balls are larger than ours?”
No, we are saying that OUR god (meat)balls are larger than YOUR god’s… learn to read.
“Oh, and one last thing. tomorrow night, while i am enjoying my wonderful plate of spaghetti, ill make sure i enjoy it.”
So we will.
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good point earth rise, dose our god really need a pulse, and if he did would his blood be spaghetti sause. they are making fun of our god when jesus had a body of bread and blood of wine…crazy
~The Red Headed One
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Lolli Popoff- Crap Geologist.
I just paid you a compliment on the other thread. But now you are saying you are a catholic republican, that respects the FSM?
Sorry pal, but thats going a bit deep.
-
Yeah, I know. It’s harder to believe than a noodly creator or a guy that dies then rises again, but low and behold, I exhist.
Catholic upbringing (not really Catholic anymore, but that’s a different story entirely)
Republican (not nessicerely taking the views on everything, but in a similar mindset)
Respects the FSM (not just respects, but LOVES)
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As stated in the hate mail they poor guy accidentally came across this site and hasn’t had time to fully understand the FSM. Everybody who laughs at him should be punished as they themselves likely didn’t convert withing 0.000001 seconds of seeing the site. this one just happened to spend his time writing hate mail instead of reading about the church like many have.
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Katsu: Well, he did took his time to half- read the about section, and write the mail…
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the FSM does not have legs OR arms… he has Noodly apendages!!!! AND the fact that you enjoy your spaghetti shows that you were meant to be a Pastafarian. Lastly our its funny how you mentioned our God has bigger balls than you, one reason for this is because you don’t have balls, the other is that our Gods balls are bigger than EVERYONES!! so it’s obvious they are bigger than your non-exsistant ones
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@JonL
“Is it really necessary to copy and paste a whole post to reference it?”
no, but its fun
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actually I suspect that he found a link to this site entitled “spam here” with a short (and wrong) description of the site. The link may have even just lead to bobby’s email. I conclude that there is a site out there directing all hate mailers in this world to this site and telling them that it is a bad place.
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“so called website”? last time i checked, most people would call this a website. And our noodly deity doesnt have meatballs for eyes, or legs or arms. He obviously hasnt seen the large picture on the top of the site. Freaking crazy christians
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our so called website with our so called noodely god has kicked your so called non noodely god’s ass
~The Red Headed One
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McSpaghetti: Holy shiest, you have a point.
FSM admits His foodness (in the form of pasta)
Jesus admits His foodness (in the form of bread and wine)
Someone tell me why all of Christianity hasn’t just converted to Pastafarianism.
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@ e.f
hello. I came across your so call WEBSITE as a mistake. ok, I have one question for you. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? How can you honestly believe that spaghetti can have legs, arms, and a pulse at the least bit? Your web site is clearly a joke, and anybody that believes a “thing†can have MEATBALLS for eyes, is clearly disturbed and should seek help immediately. How can you people make such vulgar comments about the catholic and Christian religion? saying that we have to accept that God’s balls are larger than ours? that is clearly disrespectful to all Christians. If you wish to disrespect me, i will disrespect you, by saying that you are all a bunch of LOONS with mental disabilities. Worshiping spaghetti is like worshipping Poland just because they make good water! Oh, and one last thing. tomorrow night, while i am enjoying my wonderful plate of spaghetti, ill make sure i enjoy it. But, you can give me a call next time you see the flying spaghetti monster. I would give you my number, but I can guarantee you wont need it.
-e.f.
As a mistake? I bet you send the same kind of hate mail to the altar boy porn sites to happen to stumble across…
ok, I have one question for you. Why is your mental capacity diminished to the point where you can’t differentiate between a joke and seriousness?
“Your website is clearly a joke” obviously not if you’re making a big deal out of it I guess, thump a bible?
Lol, well we can make vulgar or disrespectful comments because a good deal of them are in retaliation to hate mail we receive, and the rest is merely the truth. Ouch, lay off of the mentally disabled, using a group of disadvantaged people as an insult isn’t very christian-like. That is clearly disrespectful to all mentally disabled people. Hypocrite? Worshipping something which cannot be proven or rationally justified in it’s teachings is like worshipping Bush just because he says “we’re american so we’ll win”.
Lol okay? Have fun I guess, because we all obviously abhor eating sopaghetti when we never really said that… ace research skills =]. I could give my number so you could call me next time you come across a website and feel the need to send them hate-mail because of your own mistake, but you would probably be tying up my phone line 24/7. & I’m a supple young boy and I know how you religious zealots are into that kind of thing. & I’m not in the habit of calling older males I don’t actually know, so thanks I guess.
May You Be Touched By His Noodly Appendage
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@ earthrise
they havent converted because they are too drunk on their holy blood wine
~The Red Headed One
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The Moronic European is back with posts full of wit!
@EarthRise: not everything, but a lot is wrong in the US
@beast from the east: you’re very entertaining
@JonL: JonL Jan 30th, 2007 at 7:17 pm “Is it really necessary to copy and paste a whole post to reference it?” i’m afraid it is necessary
@Geologist: the pastafarian community didn’t start swearing, being rude and disrespectful. i wish all hardcore-christians of any kind/republicans/whatever (you know what i mean) would be as rational as you are
@e.f.: poland doesn’t make good water. you’ll find good water in the alps and in the scandinavian countries (you know….the area where ikea, nokia and kopparberg cider are from)
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@Katsu
speculation? cuz if its not, we need to spam them
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He does realize that nobody makes water it just kinda bubbles up out of the grounds or falls from the sky when the fsm seeks to reward his followers.
.
.
Why does everybody think its an insult to Pastafarian’s to eat spaghetti. Its out bloody communion meal way superior to the Christian wafer.
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@Raz “I’m a supple young boy and I know how you religious zealots are into that kind of thing. ”
.
Phew, I wouldn’t say that. MIKE will be dribbling now :)
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@Alchemist
Haha, ya true, it’s not really an invitation, it’s just to provoke a response. Unless he doesn’t want to come dispute his views with us… =[ if he actually took a look at the site he would know his e-mail would be put up for target practice.
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@The Moronic European Jan 30th, 2007 at 7:56 pm
“@JonL: JonL Jan 30th, 2007 at 7:17 pm “Is it really necessary to copy and paste a whole post to reference it?†i’m afraid it is necessary”
.
Hmm…ok then…looks like I’m a little out of touch with the latest fashions at the CoFSM these days.
RAmen
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@ The Moronic European.
I remember you from the last time… You’re a fucking moron.
I remember now.
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@Raz. “Unless he doesn’t want to come dispute his views with us”
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I’m sure he’d like to do some of that sentence {evil grin}. snigger, snigger.
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Why can’t these people understand that the Flying Spagetti Monster is no threat to their own religion. I don’t think anyone has recorded what God looks like, so why couldn’t it be the Flying Spagetti Monster?
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JonL. Don’t worry. I’m a bugger for short and sweet myself. Unless it’s a dirty joke or wild …hehehe.
.
Moronic European. Sorry if I was a bit short with you last time. I’m only 5′10″ and can’t help the way I was born. Seriously, looked back at my posts and I came over as a complete wanker. I still think you were wrong but I know I was a bit of a tit.
Mooo!
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@Alchemist
Lol, unless he doesn’t want to come debate with us.*
My last one didn’t make sense =]
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@JonL
short really is better. but like i said before, its fun to copy whole comments
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@Alchemist
Lmfao, I just got that. I’m sure he probably would, I guess we know why he’ll be enjoying his pasta.
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tomorrow night, while i am enjoying my wonderful plate of spaghetti, ill |*make sure i enjoy it*|
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So anyway, come on and charm us with your wit, The Moronic European.
I’ve been waiting since the last time!
I’m pretty sure The Wiggiles are looking for another front man.
Knock them up friend.
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1. Like everyone said, learn too use grammar! its da bomb yo!
2. OUR god’s balls are bigger than YOUR gods.
3. All of us will be eating spaghetti on Friday. Its like when you eat bread and drink wine in church.
4. Look at all of the pictures on the website, that is why we do not need your phone number.
5. He does not use His meatballs as eyes, He uses His EYES as eyes.
6. Poland DOES make good water!
7. I, personally, feel that all the christian views are offensive to this religion.
RAmen
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Almost forgot…
Using Jingles patented F**kwit Finder â„¢
.
Capitalized handle; Negative.
Overuse of capslock; Half check.
Alternating upper/lower case; Negative.
Incorrect grammar; Check.
Incorrect spelling; Check.
Threats of burning in hell, divine vengeance, etc; Negative.
Lowbrow insults; Check.
Lowbrow insults of our god; Check.
Accusations of homosexuality; Negative.
Threats of rape, physical violence, oars, etc; Negative.
Scored 4.5
4-6: A Nitwit; Likely seeking attention, may not necessarily mean to irritate, but is not aware of proper forum etiquette, and so comes across badly. With patient councilling, and the occasional application of a large blunt object, subject may be cured.
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Pasta be upon you friend. The FSM taught us that when someone strikes you in the meatball to turn the other meatball to him and sauce and cheese.
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O.K. this is my first post on this hollowed website (And as far as I can tell this is a web site. . .and Lawdry, one of my favorites) I would like to pose a question. What if this is his Wiggly-appendage-pastaness-with eye stocks’ way of testing the faithful by posting the hate mail? Kinda like when the Christian God tested his faithful by burying dinosaur bones all around and yet they never showed up in the bible. Just to be on the safe side I am going to enjoy (Garlic) bread, wine and heaps of pasta tonight and wear two pirate outfits to bed. . .
If your not a pastafarian then you are suicidal and need to seek help,
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I still have not gotten your phone number, e.f. Are you afraid to have your bluff called? I am asking again, SEND ME YOUR NUMBER because I have undeniable proof of the FSM’s existence. Are you a pansy? Are you gay and afraid to come out? Well, guess what — GAYS ARE COOL and so is everyone else so get a life and live it with us!
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To all the people who threaten to eat my god. Mind if I join you? I love eating my god. It may sound a bit kinky, but he tastes so delicious, and guess what? He actually likes being eaten. In fact, the word ‘good’ was originally pronouned the way Homer Simpson would say ‘god’ if he were eating a god–especially when it’s the FSM. Because God taste d so delicious it made him say: MMMM. GO-O-O-O-O-D!! and thus the word ‘good’ was formed because nobody knew how to spell ‘god’ with an extended ‘o’ sound without giving it the ‘oo’ sound.
.
So there.
.
St John the Blasphemist
Saint of Extended Vowel Sounds
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@e.f.
You came across this website as a mistake? You could have employed the back button in your browser, you know. That’s what it’s for.
.
“Your website is clearly a joke.” It should be clear, but apparently fools like you seem to take it literally. Find out what the word “satire” means, then reread the webpage.
.
How can we make vulgar comments about the Christian and Catholic religions? Easy. Look at what you just wrote. A religion is what its followers practice. I can respect the Christians and Catholics who are kind-hearted, peaceful, and caring people, who actually read their bibles and learn that their god was tolerant of everyone. I don’t share their beliefs, and I even consider their beliefs nonsensical at times, but I respect them as people. I can’t abide the Christians who take a holier-than-thou attitude when it comes to dealing with pastafarians, agnostics, and atheists. Didn’t your own god spend his time with tax collectors, prostitutes, and the man he knew would one day betray him to his grizzly death? Didn’t he tolerate Satan’s company without even resorting to angry language (Matthew: 4:1-11)? If Jesus could tolerate them, you can tolerate sharing the Internet with us.
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Even though I don’t love Christianity, I like true Christians, and you, e.f., seem unworthy of that title.
-Avatar of Reason
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Hello. Your site is very good.I like what i can find your site.I say to all my friends about your site.Very interesting and informative site.Thanks!
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Woo! The F**kWit Finder (TM) gets its second outing.
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@e.f
You sir, are a nitwit. Shape up, or sod off.
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Welcome aboard Elise! Grab some grog and spaghetti! Yarrrr
RAmen.
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“…How can you people make such vulgar comments about the catholic and Christian religion?…”
Because they are vulgar:
defn. [dictionary.com]
1. characterized by ignorance of or lack of good breeding or taste: vulgar ostentation…
7. lacking in distinction, aesthetic value, or charm; banal; ordinary: a vulgar painting.
–noun…
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if you need me to justify these just shout. So ef, you want bolognese sauce with your words as you eat them?
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“But, you can give me a call next time you see the flying spaghetti monster.”
And you can call ME next time you see god. Oh wait… that’s not supposed to happen is it? Shouldn’t it be more likely that I see the Flying Spaghetti Monster? Hmm… well, I guess I can guarantee that you aren’t going to need my phone number.
cheers
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I forgot to say something about your “meatballs for eyes” line. We don’t believe that he has meatballs for eyes, although that would be pretty cool. Even if we did, who are you to comment on it? Correct me if I’m wrong, but don’t you believe all of the following?
-Satan, an angel who turned bad, was cast out of heaven for angering his infinitely merciful god so much that god refused to be merciful. (Christian Oral Tradition)
-Snakes used to have legs, didn’t have forked tongues, and lived in a time when self-aware humans didn’t exist (they hadn’t eaten from the tree of knowledge). Regardless, dinosaurs can’t have ever existed. (Genesis 3)
-God is all good, even when he orders us to commit genocide against the Amelekites.
-Cain found a wife, even though he was exiled from the land of his family, and his mother and father were the only humans on earth at the time. (Genesis 4)
-Lot was a good person even though he offered to let an entire city mob rape his daughters. (Genesis 19)
-Lots daughters were good people even though they got him drunk and slept with him. (Genesis 19)
-Methusalah lived to be 969 years old. (Genesis 5)
-Noah managed to get 2 members of every species of animal on his boat (except sea creatures), including bacteria, lethal parasites, and animals that didn’t live near him (including lions and polar bears). (Genesis 6)
-God feels threatened when mortals attempt to kill him with iron weapons, despite being immortal and lacking a corporeal form. (Genesis 11)
-Joseph could predict the future. (Genesis 40-41)
If you believe all of that, meatball’s with light receptors seems quite reasonable.
-Avatar of Reason
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@Navigator Spider:
Good line about e.f. eating his words with bolognese sauce. It was very funny.
Actually, even if I’m not wrong about my claims I’d like to try that recepie. Anything with bolognese sauce is good.
-Avatar of Reason
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@ Jingles!
I need a copy of your patented Fuckwit finder! What are the other scores?
It is excellent!
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Nice post Avatar! Lots of good points :)
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Thank you very much, Booty.
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I’ve been sailing the net curious as ever. Is there a chatroom dedicated to pastafarians? my search could do with a treasure map or two to help steer a course….
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@Booty; enjoy :P
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0-2: A Wit; Intelligent, reasonable, polite and respectable. High likelihood of a reasoned belief system, and serves as a credit to the human race.
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2-4: A Wit in a Fit; While they may normally be a decent poster, they are either irritated, excited, or otherwise unfocused, allowing slightly more than the occasional slip to occur.
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4-6: A Nitwit; Likely seeking attention, may not necessarily mean to irritate, but is not aware of proper forum etiquette, and so comes across badly. With patient councilling, and the occasional application of a large blunt object, subject may be cured.
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6-7: Dimwit; Not overly violent or aggressive, but is nevertheless a troll, an inbred hillbilly, or an above average-intelligence fundamentalist. They are on the absolue edge of redeemability. With extreme electroshock, elocation & deportment lessons, and substantial severe blunt-force trauma, could be upgraded to a nitwit.
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7-8: A Twit; Annoying, loud, cannot use even simple words… what we have here is the Twit. Beyond redemption, these sorry excuses for humanity can be found primarily in years 7-9 of primary/secondary education, and behind the pulpit in Pentecostal churches. Avoid if possible. If unavoidable, bring a big stick. Thankfully, due to short attention spans, these specimens will generally depart after a single post.
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8-9: The Shit; Sets out from the off to be an absolute monkey scrotum. Unable to take a hint, this is the sort of poster who will haunt a thread for as long as their attention span holds. While not a long term poster, they can clog a thread for up to an hour in severe cases. If encountered virtually, non-engagement is advised. If encountered physically, use a shotgun.
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9-9.5: Mimic; what we have here is the stereotype troll. At first glance, will appear a complete fuckwit, however, closer inspection will reveal telltale hints that this is actually an educated poster (Nitwit or better) imitating the lower-order troll lifeform. Should they get annoying, utilising their real name will likely end the display.
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10: The granddaddy of them all, the complete and utter Fuckwit; Few and far between, these few are talked about with hushed voices. Going down in forum legend, their names will be forever uttered as a byword for all things troll. Easily capable of devouring a website for weeks on end, any challenge makes them stronger, any attention makes them bolder. Be warned, for their sign is L337, their marker is spam. If encountered in multiple numbers, can murder a thread beyond salvage. This is the anti-Cheesus. Run while you still can.
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Heres a little insight into the workings of e.f’s mind moments prior to sending her opinion-
Hmmmmm…a church site…wait a minute…A CHURCH SITE NOT DEDICATED TO MY SPECIFIC AND ARBITRARY INTERPRETATION OF GOD??!! BLASPHEMY!…Now to send an angry letter to insult the chillingly similar beliefs of hundreds of people I have never met. Yes…yes…has legs, arms and a pulse…absurd. Hmmmm…meatballs for eyes also. Hang on, this submission doesn’t make any sense….
Must…present…aptly…constructed….criticism….ARRRGGHHHHHHHHHHH! Can’t hold back nonsensical jibberish! Flooding the screen! I’m going to look like a complete tool! Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!! *submit*
FSM be praised for his noodlyness and lack of legs, arms and a pulse.
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Blasphemy!!! FSM’s eyes are NOT meatballs!
RAmen
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Nothing wrong with me…don’t know about Mary though!
Especially like the urinals :)
“Top 10 List: Reasons Mary Can’t Stop Blubbering”
http://godlesswonder.blogspot.com/2005/11/top-10-list-reasons-mary-cant-stop.html
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@Booty Jan 31st, 2007 at 1:47 am , It’s also under the files heading of the non-existent disciples of FSM page.
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how can you honestly believe in a ball of flying spaghetti? it is not a “god” of any sort, what it is, is a joke. Im not one for blaspheming against others religions, but this is the stupidest religion ive ever heard of since scientology.
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I’ve had some *top class* water from Poland – I recommend it. A couple of shots of that stuff and you’re set up for the evening.
RAmen
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@Anonymous. You think FSM and Scientology are stupid? Read the Book of Mormon. Or the Bible. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Incredibly, logic-defyingly, irrationally stupid.
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Poland Springs water is from Maine.
So really, you’re the stupid one. You eider.
I don’t think this can be said enough, but some people should not reproduce if they will bring children into the world who cannot discern satire. It hurts my soul that there are such fools, and worse yet, they breed in droves.
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Okay. I’m a Christian, but you right-wing American fundamentalist quacks really piss me off. You give Christianity a bad name throwing around your arrogant, “we know better than you” shit. The truth is no one knows the truth! All our beliefs are equally valid in society. It is our own faith in what we believe which sets us apart. I, for example, believe that people who do not follow my set of beliefs (that there is a God, Jesus died for sins, fundamentalist Christianity) are going to Hell. However, despite my own evangelism I do NOT attempt to force my opinion on anyone.
So, in short; you, sir, are a cunt of the highest order.
Go get a life and stop being such an idiot you racist Southern hick!
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I’ve seen some really offensive paintings and renditiopns of JESUS – is there a place I can call, write, email, post my complaints about how he’s portrayed; his eyes look like meatballs, how awful? Because I know damn well that Jesus is my gardener, I am watching him work now.
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Chris, i love the turn of phrase, succinctly put. it may be worth considering however that the only difference between the hicks and yourself is how you put yourself across. i think you’ll find the whole “you’re all going to hell for not believing..”thing gets little sympathy here. whilst i applaud your tact and diplomacy if find your reasoning and rationality severly lacking…
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Interesting perspective, Mr. Hately. welcome aboard!
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as Nav Spider has warned, however, your beliefs are likely to find little sympathy here. your civility and ability to express your opinions will be welcomed, though, i’m sure.
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Hi Chris. Co. Durham eh? My dad’s from your neck of the woods. Well said!
One question though. You said “However, despite my own evangelism I do NOT attempt to force my opinion on anyone.”
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How do you define evangelism?
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I’ve just been taking the time to re-read some old posts and threads, I thought it best to update everyone that despite numerous (well 3) dares to the almighty to prove me wrong on the subject of his existence i have received nothing, zip, bugger all… no smiting, burning bushes, voices or other signs.
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I have had pasta and beer quite a few times though…
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Hey, i’m back. Work has been hectic and my internet has been out so i have been away for a while.
@Jingles- i would be interested to know where TLM falls on your “Scale ‘O’ Wits”
@Mr.Chris(tian)Hately- I agree with you. I am a Christian but fundies do more damage than good. Although i’m a Christian i don’t pretend to know all the answers so i just kinda sit back and enjoy the ride. I do however take offense to using “Southern” as an insult. I am from teh south and i can say that i am neither inbred or “hickish”. People seem to think that Rednecks and hicks and racists are localized only in the southern region of the U.S. But most of the southerners i know are upstanding and inteligent. And i know for a fact that the North houses its fair share of intolerant rednecks. So please don’t use the word southern as a derogatory term. The Doctor is out
Dr.Worm
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How about calling them Texans?
From http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Texas#Law -”The justice system in Texas has a reputation for strict sentencing. According to the Prison Policy Initiative, of the 21 counties in the United States where more than a fifth of the residents are prison inmates, 10 are in Texas.”
– Or mabye putting a George W Bush mask on them all would make it OK?
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@Anonymous
Oh ok, can you give us an example of a god which is of a sort you’re familiar with, which isn’t narcissistic egomaniac that commands death, worship, and intolerance of other religious beliefs? Other than the FSM that is…
I just want the expert to throw me a bone since we’re all obviously not-in-the-know about how we should depict a god. Don’t worry about blaspheming, it’s utilizing freedom of speech. You’re entitled to your opinion, and best of all we won’t crucify you.
May You Be Touched By His Noodly Appendage
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.Last post..
which is a narcissistic*
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.Last post..
which isn’t a narcissistic**
I’m really slow today.
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OK, so we’ve got some “reasonable” believers aboard (by that i mean people who can operate caps lock and string a sentence together)
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So, in the vain hope we can kick off a bit of debate. There is no god or gods. I am convinced that religion is a bad idea and not only is it based on a fallacy it is deterimental to the human race. To re-use a previous post, there is no safe level of religion, it is toxic in any amount and pollutes the mind.
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You are of course entitled to try and change my opinion on this, in fact i welcome it! but i would ask in return the same…
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@Navigator Spider- have you seen the movie Dogma? I was just wondering because the “13th deciple” stated it best when he said ideas are good, and beliefs are bad. He states that an idea can be changed easily,but beliefs are harder. Basically what i gathered, is that the idea of God is not bad, but that idea has been corrupted through the ages in the form of man-made religion. I would have to agree with that. He goes on to say that no religion or denomination of any religion has ever “gotten it right”. Once again, that is my feeling exactly. I believe in a God, but religion is a whole other monster.
A religion can shape and mold God into whatever form they see fit. In a society run by religions officials, all they have to do to declare war is say that “God instucted us to fight his enimes” Next thing you know you have the Crusades and thousands dying on both sides. I see nothing wrong with faith or believing in a god, but to blindy follow a religion is idiotic.
RAmen
Dr. Worm
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Hi Dr. Worm. You say you believe in “a god”. Do you mean an entity who sparked the whole thing off? I can understand that. I doubt it’s true but I can see your position.
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@Alchemist- yeah, thats pretty much what i mean. Everything is way too complicated to be completely random, at least thats what i think. I guess i have come to believe in what i would describe as “limited evolution”. Basically, i believe in evolution and adaptation to a certain extent, but there is no way i can believe that single celled organisms develop into self aware human beings, no matter how long the time frame. Random mutations and natural selection explain alot but not everything. I can go into more detail if your interested in hearing it but i’m bout to go to lunch, and eating is way more important at the moment. I’ll be happy to talk about it more when i get back. Until then, the Doctor is out.
Dr.Worm
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@The Church of Olive Garden Jan 31st, 2007 at 9:35 am, Please email your complaints to bobby.henderson@gmail.com. Sorry nobody answered you sooner
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the Deist perspective is always one which i find interesting, Dr Worm. however, if our complex universe requires an equally complex creator, then from where did such a creator arise? he can’t simply have been around forever, since to postulate eternal existence is to remove the need for a god altogether. if anything can exist eternally, then there’s nothing to say our universe hasn’t done so, forever expanding and contracting in upon itself. hell, this universe may not be the first, or only universe to exist. in fact, if space/time are as eternal as any God (and i see no reason why they shouldn’t be, if eternal existence is possible) then the odds are a dead cert that sooner or later sentient life will emerge. in fact, the odds are a dead cert that it has already done so an infinite number of times already.
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i’d love to hear more about your perspective, however. if there is such a thing as eternity, then i see no need for a god/creator. if there is not such a thing as eternity, then do you still believe we need a creator? perhaps the creator (or creators) could be some ancient, extraterrestrial race whose attainment of self-awareness predates our own by billions of years? does your hypothetical creator need to be supernatural, if the universe has not existed for eternity?
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i could enjoy this. let’s hear it…
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It’s all true. Jesus worked for the Spagetti man and I had always suspected so. That whole thing about predicting someone would betray him…Yea right. That was right after I confronted him about a secret meeting with the great noodleness. I ended up being the fall guy.
If you look close at the Divenchi pic, we had spagetti for dinner. No wine either. It was kool-aide. The kool-aide dude is totally in on the whole thing.
Like it matters. You’ll all blame me anyway :( I’m so depressed!
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I love KKKhristians, after my lions get done with them they are so tender and quiet.
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I love KKKhristians, after my lions get done with them they are so tender and quiet.
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ooops, sorry already on the grogg
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@ Dr. Worm. What Homo narrans said :) likewise.
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Lions! Ha! That’s the easy way out. You ever see Caligula (I can’t spell because of the devil and I don’t have a spell check). Try having a string tied to to talley wacker and wine forced down your throat. It’s worse than kidney stones — I swear it is. Then they hit you in the stomach with a sword. It’s actually a relief at that point.
I don’t know why I don’t have anything happy to talk about. Dang it!
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“Try having a string tied to to talley wacker and wine forced down your throat”
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Oooh, do we go to the same club?
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All I can do is laugh at all the silly silly nonbelievers… My one and only Noodly Goodness doesn’t mind if you mock him or my religion because He’s cool like that and He understands where you’re coming from, and I, wanting to be in His image don’t mind either. And to all of my brothers and sisters, don’t hate them, just shake your head and smile… They will believe in the Spaghetti Monster one day also.
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Dr Worm. “Everything is way too complicated to be completely random”
we hear this one a lot, and i sympathise with it, i really do. the universe as we find it is monstrous, cold, uncaring, amoral place. I find myself becoming jealous to a certain extent of people that have a deeply held faith, because of the nice warm comfortable feeling it must give to simply know everything is for a purpose and will be ok in the end.
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The problem however is a very very very simple one. There is absolutley no evidence for it. the scientific theories that have been formulated may well turn out to be incorrect, but they at least look at the evidence, and postualte based upon it. i simply cannot bring myself to believe in something for which there is no proof other than preachers statement or books made from preachers statements. it is hard to maintain this point of view, in times of emotional turmoil (and having both served in the forces and as an orphan i’ve had a few). But even when i find myself wanting there to be something, i find it is simply that MY wanting there to be, it is a weakness of my consciousness to assign human motives and try to anthropomorphise the universe. if this were a court case it would be thrown out for lack of evidence, all there is is hearsay, inadmissable in any civilised rational legal system…
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hutupSa udasJa! eWa aveHa oreMa ineWa! uitQa opyingCa rincePa, ouYa uttheadBa!
By the way folks, I’m planning a comeback in late June. As of now we will be touring with Metallica, but nothing is set in stone yet. Stone…that was funny. Kind of like Moses. Get it? Ah, never mind.
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Working on a hate-mail song, should have it in tomorrow.
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@ Navigator Spider
I agree with you that wanting there to be a god of some kind is a human condition, but as well as the emotional need many people have for some higher power, curiosity makes us search for new things, but if they can’t be explained, they’re strange and often frigtening, some peple would rather just say ‘god did it’ than try to study whatever it is further.
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The christians of course think that athiests are taking the easy way out by not believing, no threat of hell etc. because telling yourself that no matter what you do, as long as you ask for forgiveness, it’ll all be all right isn’t?
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Ahoy shipmates! I’ve been reading the postings on the site and I love this stuff! I’ve just ordered my copy of the gospel so hopefully soon I will fully understand his noodlyness. Off to the store for my pirate outfit…
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Ahoy indeed, another pirates sups at the grog bottle of noodliness, good to see!
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Claprán, always nice to have someone agree with you. I couldn’t disagree more with the christians who think we take the easy way out. To really admit to yourself that this possibly all there is is very hard. I still maintain that a person who is moral and atheist is far more moral than one who simply does it out of fear of devine punishment and retribution. To take full responsibility for your life and actions rather than assign religious meaning and motive has to be more difficult. so drink on my friends, drink, sing and be merry. Enjoy every moment and make the most of what you have, you may not get another chance…
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Hey, guys, i’m actually swamped at work right now so i’m gonna have to postpone the discussion for a while, but i’ll come back when i get a chance and hopefully have a good defense. Later maties!!!
Dr.worm
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My family (all supposed atheists but they ‘wish they could believe’ (what??)) tell me that it’s arrogant not to believe in a god of some sort. I think that the arrogance is assuming that the human race is so damn special that we alone violate all rules of the known universe and persist after death, and that any superintelligence that could direct the galaxies would a)look like us and b)care what the hell we thought about anything!
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Although of course the FSM is different; he is evident in all things and not believing in his noodlyness is truly arrogance of the highest degree.
RAMEN
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@Navigator Spider: You’re too right… Frankly it’s the fundamentalist religious people who devote their lives to some invisible friend who are taking the easy way out, by refusing to accept the universe for what is. At the end of the day, living your life in a moral way only out of fear of some Big Brother-esque sky god does not make you a better person- if you are truly moral you should not require the constant threat of punishment to act in the right way.
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I don’t necessarily believe in Pastafarianism, but I’m not about to knock it. The only religion I’ll disrespect is Christianity because of all the fanatics that try to convert me (I’m agnostic). I don’t see any religion that has more proof than any other, religion is based on faith, faith is based on lack of proof. I think it’s good for anyone to believe in something greater than them, but the Christian fanatics take it too far, “If you don’t believe in Christianity, you’re going to hell!” Okay, maybe in your religion, but what about mine? To sum up, worship what you like. And personally, I find it easier to believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster than a bearded man who first was the son of god, then became god.
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Belonging to those “who are unable to believe in a well defined higher being”, I nevertheless admire people (most of them… Christians) who do very good things to others, surmounting almost unsurmountable obstacles, only supported by their faith. But somehow, I’ve got the impression they’re a small minority, largely outnumbered by raging fundies.
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Anyone who does good to others, for any reason, should be applauded. But I have the feeling that even if all religion was abolished tomorrow, people would still go on doing the same stuff. If you’re basically a nice person you’ll keep doing nice, selfless things for people and fight against the odds to be able to do that. All calling it religion does is provide a base for the fundies to say ‘look how nice people who follow our religion are! we must be right.’
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Nice people would be nice people with or without religion. I think the only example where religion forces some people to be good are the born agains, who would otherwise alll be crack addicts and in jail. Not that they still might not be crack addicts, but most of them aren’t in jail anymore. Unfortunatly, this also cause them to be enormous assholes, probably the after effects of either the crack or prison food.
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@Skrae
I really dislike the use of the term ‘disrespect’ when describing attacks on ideas and beliefs that aren’t worthy of respect in the first place. Respect must be first earned to be lost, which is why should I decide to launch an attack on a Christian Fundamentalist I would hesitate to say I am disrespecting them. I wouldn’t disrespect them, as that would lend implied credence to their views, rather I’d tell them they’re a bunch of stupid dicks with their collective heads up their collective arses. Sorry if I’m coming across as over-picky but fundies are given far too much lee-way in world society already to be allowed to get off on minor techinicalities within the scope of our control.
@the spaghetti shaman & L’Tuae
I think you both hit the nail on the head there.
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Man has this got out of hand. All I was trying to do was throw down a few good ideas. O.K. First of all it wasn’t the ten commandments, it was the three suggestions. I had to meet Moses up on the mountain and the air was thin and he … well, he got it a little wrong.
The truth is, I’m really laid back. I could care less if you believe in me and I hate Republicans. Every time I hear that hick say “God Bless America” I just want to puke. Trust me; you don’t me to do that.
I don’t have time to listen to your stupid “prayers” and the idiots who wrote that book “the bible” got ate by bacteria just like all you guys who “jacked off” at night. It really doesn’t matter, because I just don’t care. I’ve got my own issues. Quit your whining and quit pretending you know me. As much as you might pride yourself in it consider this one thing: Faith is a simple absence of objectivity — are you really proud of not being objective. That’s about as deep as I’m gonna get.
Oh yea. Thought you should know; G O D is a acronym for “got one dick”. It was funny at the time.
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@The diety formerly known as G O D
Awesome, nice man, nice.
@Rortatious
Yeah, the respect to lose thus disrespected thing is true. Sorry about grammar there. I was just trying to avoid using the word “attack.” The Christian religion states that you shouldn’t judge and you should love all people or something right? Then why the hell won’t they do it, if Christianity is in fact true, and I’m going to hell, I’ll have a blast, as the only one I know who sold his soul to the devil, and afterwards the devil asked for a refund, I’ll have a lot of fun, I might be able to take over. jk. I think the Christian religion might have the right idea, but if more people would actually follow it, it would be nice. I’m actually considering converting to Pastafarianism. Praise the Flying Spaghetti Monster!
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I would like to know if there is any organised group based on the worship of Poland. Being of Irish descent, I am interested in joining.
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@Everyone, especially Mountain Born Pirate Witch
People keep saying that stupid people should stop breeding. I’m not sure I agree, primarily because of the work of Aldous Huxley. In Huxley’s fantastic novel Brave New World, the world is maintained by building people to be very good at the jobs they are required to do. Breeding was replaced by genetic manufacture, and everything else was regulated by damaging fetuses, cloning (called Bokanovskification, if I spelled it correctly), and classical conditioning. If you wanted astronauts who would be resistant to disorientation, you might make engineers but spin them occasionally while they were fetuses, for example. To those who lived in Huxley’s world, it was supposed to be perfect. (To the reader, who does not live inside it, their world was supposed to be revolting and abhorrent.) Regardless, the characters whose job it was to regulate the next generation persisted in making stupid people. Huxley even alluded to an “experiment” in the book in which they tried to make an entire self-sustaining world of only alphas (people of high intelligence). It was a disaster because no one wanted to do menial labor. Even though Huxley only made that allusion once, the idea was obvious. Smart people are reliant on stupid people to do the tasks that they don’t want to do.
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Of course, in Huxley’s world the smart people are conditioned to hate the stupid ones anyway. Maybe stupid people should breed and work for smart ones, but they should leave smart people alone otherwise.
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I would also like to point out that I haven’t spoiled the plot at all for those who haven’t read it, so you should still read it if you like distopia novels.
-Avatar of Reason
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what ever happened to a thing called tolerance? why can’t we just accept and tolerate everyone’s beliefs and not feel the need to criticize those (beliefs) that are different from our own? just a thought…
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@hannah
Try telling that to the fundies, who feel it’s their right to indoctrinate everyone into their social engineering (read control) agenda. Oh by the way they state this on all their major websites (Answers in Genesis, Creation Ministries, Truth in Science ect ect). They have said they will not rest until they have “saved” everyone. (read forced them into acceptance of their own interpretation of biblical authority) Will find you some quotes from these sites when I have time. (have them all stowed netly nicely somewhere on this system…just for such a time as this)
RAmen
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Oh and hannah I meant to ask…do you consider this professed evangelical (fundie) attitude tolerant of others beliefs?
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@Eye Witness
Ironically, their own bible dictates that it is impossible for every non-Christian to be turned into a Christian. Their book entitled “Revalation” details the fate that all non-Christians will face in the end of times.
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Oh, wait. I just thought of something terrible. If they won’t rest until we’re all converted, and it is impossible for us all to be converted before the end of the world, it can only mean one thing! They’re going to ruin our eternity in hell by sending missionaries their too! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! It really will be torture!
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Hmmmm. Or there is a flaw in their logic. That works too.
-Avatar of Reason
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@Hannah
I want to say two quick things.
1.)Your name is a palendrome. Cool.
2.)I like your comment about respecting others’ beliefs, and I’m sure almost everyone else on this website does too. It’s why we don’t send hate mail to Christian websites, and why we don’t threaten to shove oars in peoples’ rear ends. We only disrespect people who go out of their way to publically proclaim their hatred of us. As far as I’m concerned disrespecting them is acceptable (and fun).
-Avatar of Reason
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Hannah adn Avatar, again i applaud your sentiment. It’s a lovely idea. But the more i learn and experience the less i feel like leaving religion alone. I fail to see why it should be exempt from criticism or ridicule, it’s history is not a glorious one and it’s basis is dubious at best. It takes money from the public purse and inflicts damage on children, not to mention the very simple fact it is not true.
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Many people have posted here asking for tolerance for beliefs and reasoning everyone is entitled to their faith. I would now disagree with that. Religion is a sliding scale with moderates at one end and extremists at the other. By tolerating one we give tacit consent to the other, after all how can you argue one religious belief is wrong and another right since neither offer up and proof or evidence? This is not a hatred of any person, but a rebutal of religious belief. To labour a point – there is no safe level of religion. We need to oppose it wherever and whenever we can.
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@ Spider
Well said, Navigator. (as usual)
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@ Avatar
Regarding Huxley’s “Brave New World”, this is where your “reason” has escaped me. He was making a statement on social order; selective breeding was the tool used to create the social stratification, but there is more to the story than that. Cross breeding a “stupid” person with another will not necessarily produce “stupid” progeny. Likewise, intelligence does not always produce intelligence. There will exist a certain amount of genetic variation and mutation in any given conception. The dumbing down of the workforce was do to environmental factors, as well. That was the whole point of having “outsiders” who practiced natural selection. And Huxley’s premise was not suggesting that we actually carry out this experiment. He left it as a warning to future generations as something we should avoid at all costs. (I will end there as to prevent any further spoilers.) That said, I do agree that it is worth the read. Thanks for bringing it up.
MJK
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@Navigator Spider:
I applaud you desire to protect people from their follies. I feel the same desire, which is why I tend to give missionaries a hard time. (See the “fsm crashes Flock of Dodos screening” thread for details; I had a debate with some Jehovah’s Witnesses.) At times I have also thought that religion was a veritable blight on the human race, but despite that sad apparent truth, there are three major problems with stamping it out, however tempting it might be.
1.) Your theory deals only with human history. It does not deal with all potential religions that might exist in the future. One can imagine the existence of a religion that could be a societal boon regardless of whether or not such a religion would be true or false. Furthermore, deciding that religion is “evil” requires a coherent definition of the word. Philosophers who seek to define evil without god tend to either fail or disagree. At that point, it becomes hard to explain precisely why religion must be stamped out.
2.) Your theory does not deal with all currently existing human religions. It ignores one. Deism is a religion in the sense that it believes in a creator god, but deism does not cause any noticeable harm. Why bother the deists?
3.) Your theory is not practical. Even if we could all agree that the existence of religion was a flagrant violation of a universal ethical law, and that all religions were included, it would still be impossible to eradicate religion. Fundies on this website have already demonstrated that logic does not alter their opinions. These are the types of people who could have a discussion with Socrates and not change their minds once in the course of the conversation. People with religion tend to cling to it, and even when they leave it, they often return. It would be nearly impossible to get rid of religion, and even if we did, we would have no assurances that it would not get reinvented.
I understand that you might want to resist religion to lessen the stranglehold it has on the human race, and there I can agree with you. That is one of the reasons why I am on this site. Regardless, I would not seek to go door to door preaching hatred of religion. I only fight religion by fighting its spread, not by fighting the people who practice it in private in a way that harms no one.
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In conclusion, I don’t often like religion, either. I usually detest it, and have often thought of how much better the world could be when it no longer prowled the earth preying on the innocent and foolhardy. Regardless, I don’t think that much can be done about it, and I do think that it is possible to have a religion that is an exception to the rule (deism, or some other religion that is currently undiscovered). The more I think about it, the less I could bring myself to burn books, which is one of the many things that destroying religion would entail.
-Avatar of Reason
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i would never advocate burning books, how else can we learn?
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but in response to “deism does not cause any noticeable harm. Why bother the deists?” because i am convinced they do. If we concede that a deist is harmless, and entiltled to hold his beliefs how can you then criticise a more extreme believer? there is equal proof for either set of beliefs, it is only our opinion that their resultant behaviours present different justifications for their tolerance whereas the believer justifies their faith (and therefore their behaviour) because they claim the faith itself justifies it. I prefer to use truth as a basis for justification. So, does god exist? on balance of evidence no. Should we follow a set of laws and behaviours based on a non exisitent gods wishes? no.
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Before we leap to the “we might as well commit murder then “argument. we can apply the same criteria. Is murder a good thing? on balance of evidence, no. so we make it against the law, and so on….
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Burning books! nonononononono, never! “shudder”
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What a horrible thing that would be. Because it is of course what has been done for ages, you want to destroy a rival peoples god you destroy all books, temples, statues etc etc of it. That is of course why so much ancient knowledge has been lost and had to be rediscovered again. No, I could never bring myself to destroy books, not even bibles or other “holy” books. Besides there are some stunningly beautifull (old) bibles in existance.
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I don’t have to believe in god or deity of choice to enjoy it’s art.
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On this we agree, even though i refute their findings, bibles are fascinating, especially the more beautiful ones. they represent steps on the ladder of mans progress. we should cherish them, but as with allthings you have to be prepared to let go and move on.
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@Navigator Spider:
You are using a slipery slope arguement to explain why certain seemingly harmless religions are bad. The problem with slippery slope arguements is that they only explain why trends are bad, not why actions are bad. I agree that militant fundamentalists harm humanity, but your only arguement for why deists are bad, unless I misunderstood you, was that they might lead to militant fundamentalists.
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The obvious counterarguement is that any intelligent religious person (if there are any) could make is that atheists and people who question the existence of absolute ethical laws are not to be tolerated because they are a slippery slope that could lead towards Stalin. Regardless, for the sake of arguement, I will accept that deism is absolutely and unquestionably evil.
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Even when I do that, you still haven’t answered my question about how you can actually destroy religion such that it will never respawn. You have clearly stated that you don’t support burning books, and I’m quite glad to hear it because I hate the idea as well. However, I don’t see what else you plan on doing. Unless you kill every religious person, destroy every religious book and artifact, and finally destroy anything that alludes to the existence of religion, you run the risk of more religions forming. Even then you would have to contend with the fact that people want to believe, and can reinvent the idea. Would you propose a religion thought-police to maintain your religion free world?
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Propose the alternate strategy, and I would be glad to hear it, because the way I see it now, I either have to hurt people and ideas to protect other people and other ideas, or I have to tolerate religion. I’d rather do the later than the former, but if you have a third option, I’m all ears.
-Avatar of Reason.
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I do, of course, have the hope that humanity will wisen up and not preach their lies to each other, but that seems to me to be nothing more than an idle dream.
-Avatar of Reason
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thats basically it, we need to hope people will move on. they won’t of course in the near future but we need to try otherwise we will never got there. As for the slippery slope argument, i consider it an important one, but more important is that of justification. otherwise we are accepting beliefs on their results not their basis. As an example a staunch catholic has just as much evidence as a relaxed one, yet they would inflict their rigid system on a child, so we would call that “bad” – but only from our point of view. from his he is fully justified as his faith tells him (or her of course) to do it. to take this to an extreme you have people who commit horrendous atrocities – but here is the important bit, from their point of view they are fully justified in doing so. I argue however that it is faith that is wrong, not the purpose to which it is applied. Like a crime – it is wrong, drink driving for instance is to be abhored; whether you manage to get away without an accident or not is largely irrelevant, it is the first principle that needs to be combatted.
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@ Avatar (Feb 1st, 2007 at 1:42am)
1) How do you propose we deal with a religion that does not yet exist?
2) Deism is a religious philosophy, not a specific religion. They can come from any religious background. While prominent in the 17th century, the advent of the Industrial Revolution saw their numbers decline. Many tend to lean towards Agnosticism today.
3) Have you read Richard Dawkin’s “The God Delusion”? He puts it much more eloquently than I could ever dream of doing.
The burning books suggestion is just ridiculous. Religious texts should be regarded for what they are: allegorical anecdotes, and used as examples of what believing in fairytales can lead to. The very reason copies of Adolph Hitler’s “Mein Komf” still exist. Education is the key to understanding.
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as an aside, religious texts do help corroborate historical events, characters, natural diasasters and so on… but like any old text, they have to be taken with a pinch of salt, or maybe the odd barrel full….
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@Navigator Spider:
Now that you have elaborated on your opinions, I must state that while I might not agree with them entirely, we are on the same page. I hope that we can agree to disagree on this one issue. I prefer to fight religion defensively, and you offensively, but we are on the same side of the struggle.
@Captain Mad John Kidd
1.) My comment is that it might be theoretically possible to have a religion that does no harm. I was stating that I can think of no good reason why such a religion would need to be abolished for the betterment of humankind. Maybe you can. Alternatively, you can state that no harmless religion could exist. Slippery slope arguments don’t tend to persuade me, unless you can prove that they are slippery enough, so to speak, that the realization of the problem at the bottom of the slope is inevitable. Any one of those proofs would neutralize my argument.
2.) If deism is not a religion, are you agreeing that it is okay to tolerate deists? I know one who is very much alive, and he, due to his deism, believes in a god. Why is his leap of faith okay where others are not? Do you object to dogma, or god?
3.) I have not (yet) read The God Delusion. It’s one of the books that I want to read someday, but I don’t have much time for it now. I have heard a few clips of interviews with him, and I respect him. My major problem with his philosophy is that he, too, takes a leap of faith. To say that the existence of god is improbable is fair. To say that no god could possibly exist is a leap of faith. I, because I don’t believe what I cannot prove, I can’t know that god isn’t real. I can’t embrace his philosophy. I must remain an agnostic, because faith based atheism seems little better than religion as a theory. (My comment is about atheism as a theory, not as a practice. I agree that in practice, religions tend to produce violence far more often than atheism.)
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Lastly, my comment about book burning was not ridiculous in the sense that destroying a religion entirely relies on destroying its ideas and beliefs. My old religion was the victim of such attacks more than once. Book burning is one of the first things people try when they seek to demoralize those who practice a given faith. I agree that atheists and agnostics might not burn books ourselves, and that the existence of a book does not logically imply the existence of a believer in that book, but I was trying to state that destroying a religion is a difficult task, and one with potentially nice ends but questionable means.
-Avatar of Reason
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Fair enough. You are quite correct in that i no longer wish to just sit back and ignore religion as it has nothing for me. It has enjoyed its protected position for too long. As i tried to describe i find the slippery slope argument secondary compared to that of justification. I do not agree that deism has a place in a civilised world. the fact that although a person survived a near death experience (obviously we should be pleased he has) i agree with “Why is his leap of faith okay where others are not?” as far as i am concerned it isn’t.
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to use the crime analogy again, the enthusiasm with which i would go after a belief is related to its effects, in the same way the seriousness of a crime determines the punishment and resources allocated to fighting it. But i still view any religion as wrong because it is simply not true and propogates a lie. I wholeheartedly agree that no “leap of faith” has preference over another, and i condemn them all…
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We agree that stopping religion (or destrying it) is incredibly hard. convincing the world that it was round was as well, it took hundreds of years. But thats no reason why we should not try
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Getting rid of religion requires more of a change of economic circumstances. Religions flourish most among the underprivileged, the poor and those who, having little hope in the current political or economic system, pin their hopes on an afterlife which will reward them for their present suffering. Once you remove the oppressive economic conditions you remove the need for a supernatural prop, ie when you are happy with your life, job, income, place of residence etc you don’t need a supernatural being; this is why so many scientists and other intellectuals in the West, who have good lives materially, are atheists; they have outgrown the need for gods. Although it is contrary to the entire Capitalist ethos anyone who is serious about wanting to get rid of religion by getting rid of the circumstances that cause it should be espousing a raising of educational standards by devoting far greater resources to schooling and introducing a taxation system which helps the poor out of welfare dependency and gives them self respect. Of course you are still going to have idiots who advance religious ideas and the deliberately idle who would take all the benfits on offer but refuse to engage in the social contract but that’s just human nature. The fact that you could improve the lot of most people at the expense of allowing some fools to prosper is a price worth paying.
One other way of suppressing religion would be to prohibit it being taught in schools. In Britain we have a petition on the web asking the government to withdraw state funding to all “faith” schools and another asking for the teaching of religion to be forbidden in schools. I suspect that we are all 400 years ahead of our time in that it will probably take that long for the economic situation to improve sufficiently for most people to grow out of religion; anything we can do in the meanwhile to hasten that day along via debate and argument and simply by “bearing witness” (in the christians’ own phrase) to the merits of a religion-free life has to be a good thing. (Pastafarian conduct does just these things of course!!!!!)
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Wow, alot has happened shince i’ve been gone and alot of really long posts that i don’t have time to read. I think i agree with Hannah though, i’m getting pretty tired of the intolorance of some people. Im a Christian, not a fundie, but i keep getting roped in with them. Alot of people automatically assume that Christian = Fundie… not true.
Also, i am republican. But i hate Bush, i don’t care if your gay or not and the war in Iraq has turned into a fiasco. But for some reason, alot of people believe that all republicans want to trade blood for oil and cut down all the rainforests. Sorry to burst your bubble, but some of us are actually inteligent and socially aware and not all republicans eat babies (I know i rarely do, and only on special occasions)
I am republican because traditionally (and notice i said traditionally) republicans have stood for less government control and democrats want a larger more active government, i.e. affirmative action, gun control, bloated welfare budges blah blah blah. But at this point i don’t think i’m either, because both sides are retarded. If there was a viable third party that would take some control away from the government i would be all for it, but no third party will ever be elected in America. Besides, if Hillary gets elected the world is screwed. Anyone from any party would be better than Hillary.
If you don’t like America, then leave but don’t live here and then bash it. I’ve said it before and i’ll say it again… I love America, but our government and its officials are a joke.
Hannah, i agree with you. I wish we could do something about the intolorance but unfortunately we can’t. But as a fundie republican baby eater i guess the only solution i can come up with is to blow them up and then eat their babies, and maybe cut down some trees while we’re at it.
-Baby Eater (formerly Dr.Worm)
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Come on guys, can’t you just believe in a 2000 year old carpenter like everyone else?
RAmen
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I’d rather believe in a lion headed snake that created the world with power he took from God’s daughter Sophia, until he lost it when he created Adam and Eve. They then passed it on to the great SETH.
By the way what is Hell in your religion?
And what does Italy mean to you?
RAmen
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Dr.worm, Ramen Dr.worm.
It seems that some have lost site of the FSM,
I am not here to kill all religion.
I’ve stated many times I think we all need something to believe in.
I choose to believe in myself, that is my choice.
I have no desire to start a war against religion, nor does the FSM.
Only against those who try to push their beliefs on others.
That is the whole reason behind the FSM, and the reason I am here.
Keep the faith Dr Worm.
Ramen
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My good Dr. Worm. Do you usually eat your babies raw or do you microwave them for a bit first?
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Hiya Lolli. Just a quick post and run for now! Catch you later on.
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@Snaggles
I don’t think we have a hell, what would we punish people for?
A place in Europe mainly populated with italians.
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Hell just seems to be an ineffective means of threatening people with damnation for not acting and believing as they do. Or as some book says they should.
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They keep saying we’re going to hell, but we can’t figure out if it’s in the Caimans, Kentucky, or Norway? I can’t wait to go if it’s in the Caimans.
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@Lolli, thanks for the support. See, you get it, why can’t other people. I’m not tring to push my beliefs and i don’t have the time or energy to bash the beliefs of other people. If you want to believe in yourself thats fine, no complaints here. I kinda suck as a person so believing in myself would be nothing but a let down but if it works for you then go for it.
@Alchemist- you never want to microwave a baby, for the same reason you never microwave a good steak, it ruins the flavor and makes the meat chewy. And i can’t believe you asked if i eat them raw… thats just ignorant. I’m a republican not a wild animal, raw meat is full of germs and parasites, i know better. The best way to prepare baby is on a spit slow roasted over a fire… like a pig. You know in some canibal cultures the word for people translates to “long pig”. I think Fat Bastard said it best in Austin Powers… “baby, the other other white meat.” If you need any more advice on preparing a baby, look for my book “All You Need to Know About Eating Babies”. You can find it at all reputable retail stores next to Peter Popoffs Miracle Water.
RAmen
Dr.Worm
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@BobfromEngland
I agree, but I think the need for religion goes deeper than socioeconomic circumstances. A lot of it seems to have to do with the fear of permanent loss, which I can understand. If by some horrible event my son died I would be desperate to be able to believe anything if it told me I would be able to see him again one day, and that the person I had loved so much had not gone for ever. Same goes for just about everyone I think. Could explain why some people get more religious as they get older. More people they loved have died and they really really want to see them again. Maybe we’ll get rid of religion when we cure death. Until then I think there’ll always be a part of people that wants to believe we won’t have to be alone.
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-e.f. I read with interest your post regarding your ire at the expressions of belief in the Flying Spaghetti Monster. I think you may be in danger of actually trying to place yourself higher than God (whatever you percieve God to be). It is a very unusual omnipotent deity that would be bothered about such expressions of view, why do you presume to be able to speak for your God?
It has just occured to me that perhaps you are the Pope and therefore you actually do speak for your God. If you are the Pope then I’m sorry – not sorry that you’re the Pope, of course, simply for the frailty of my argument.
Avast behind me hearties!
RAmen
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aaarrrrr me hearties,
this has all got a bit on the esoteric and philosophical side, with the for and against debate for religion… i’m as guilty as anyone for it i know so at the risk of repetition i’ll state my opposition against religion in all its various guises.
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coz it’s a lie.
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tried to get it down to less words, sorry…
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@Navigator Spider
I agree with you about this debate. We’ve pretty much been debating why we agree that debating fundies when they send hate mail to this website is a good thing to do. Does it really matter why we bash the fundies, as long as we are bashing fundies? Lets just agree to disagree about why we agree.
@Dr. Worm
I have stated before that I have no problem with non-militant non-missionary Christians. I would never confuse you for a fundie.
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I have to say that all this debating is getting a little tiresome. Why don’t we all just agree to work on a way to raise funds for a pirate ship (like the one on the home page)so we can all just lay around in the sun and pillage when we get bored. I vote that for our fist pillaging experience we hit up some liquor stores and grocery stores, that way we can be good and drunk for any subsequent pillaging. Does anyone know how to sail, cause i sure as hell don’t. Although i’m sure i can figure it out if i’m durnk… i can do anything when i’ve been drinking for a few hours. And even if we can’t figure it out we can just drop anchor and continue to get hammered. Either way its a win win situation.
RAmen
Dr.Worm
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Praise his name! FSM is the true creator.
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@ Dr. worm:
Couldn’t agree more, especially about the theological disputation. A word of caution, though: once seriously drunk, one tends to forget about wenches, who are really mostly both decorative and nice, and need to be brought along for intellectual company. (…maybe some are intolerant of drinking, though…) We shouldn’t stop at ports without strippers.
PS: saw a great picture a few years ago of a sailboat in a race – its spinnaker was blown out straight in front of the boat, and the guy holding the halyard had been jerked pretty much to the top of the mast. Even us pirates might be sobered up by that….
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A word of caution, though: once seriously drunk, one tends to forget about wenches.”
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I say nonsense! Get me drunk, point me to the Wenches!
Wenches beware!
As far as sailing, I’ve been in a Regatta or three.
Can’t remember if I know how to sail or not though?
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@Lolli P.
You’re right, of course – should have realized I was speaking for myself, LOFLMAO. Ash long ash one is shober enough to know a wench when one sheesh one….
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Intolerant of drinking!! I could drink you under the table! Pass the grog!
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I know plenty of fine wenches who could drink many a pirate under the table. Not me yet, though.
And I emailed Bobby my suggestion for fundraising: get a booth at Gencon^_^
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I could drink all o’ ye under a table. Assuming you’re already under the table to begin with, *hearty laugh*.
RAmen
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Oh dear. Looks like I’m certainly in the minority here for this issue! Hahah.
Not to delay a debate that’ll just end up going in circles any further, but there’s one thing Nav.Spider said I’d like to comment on: “If we concede that a deist is harmless, and entiltled to hold his beliefs how can you then criticise a more extreme believer?” Because there IS a difference between the two. The first diest isn’t bothering you or anyone else. The second diest is. Everyone has the right to believe whatever they want, until they try to push it on others. You don’t have to like, or even respect their beliefs. You can absolutly abhore them. For instance, I loathe what the KKK think, and couldn’t respect them LESS if I tried–but until they come to my door and start ranting they have the right to think what they think.
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And yes, you can try to change a thiest’s mind through debate or similar avenues, but at the end of the day they’re not going to change their mind unless they want to.
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And yes, in case you couldn’t tell I’m not at all for trying to rid the world of religion, because religion isn’t the actual PROBLEM, if you ask me. People are the problem. Religion isn’t alive, it’s a thing, a mindset, a catagory of beliefs. *People* people are good or *people* are evil. They always will be good or evil, whether they have religion or not. Religion might make it easier for someone to excuse doing wrong–but something tells me that without it they’d find a way to do wrong all the same.
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If I know someone’s an athiest/agnostic, then fine. Good for them, whatever. I won’t be inviting them to temple then, I guess. (Not that I go to temple these days myself…) I might not agree with them 100% personally, doesn’t mean I can’t respect them or ‘agree to disagree’, as it were. And at the same time, I’d expect the same respect from that athiest, not because I believe in God, but because I’m a PERSON who–I like to think–deserves to be treated decently and not told I’m being stupid/foolish/naive/immature/weak every five seconds.
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Kay, done now.
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Two things about drinking:
1. It takes years to get good at.
2. If you’re really good at it, you don’t realize it.
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There’s probably more then just two things about drinking,
but those are the only two I know of.
Oh, yeah, there is something about twelve steps or something like that?
Someone told me about that once, but I forgot.
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Very good rant gill^_^ I agree.
Though I have to admit on my bad days I might lean a bit more towards Spider.
but seriously, if they keep it to themselves in all ways it really shouldn’t be a problem.
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Ramen to you too, Gill!
Ramen
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Just to unite the theology, drinking, and wenching themes above, let me offer:
“Every man must believe in something; I believe I’ll have another drink.”
and
“I fell in love with a woman some years ago; she drove me to drink, and I never even had the decency to thank her.”
—inexact quotes from W. C. Fields—
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Without pissing anybody off, (anymore then I aready have).
Once ANYBODY, feels it is up to themselves to decide what,
ANYBODY, else has a right to believe in, or not believe in.
They have become just as annoying as the fundies we so love to battle.
Live and let live!
Period,
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Live and let die!
RAmen Lolli RAmen
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In regards to the post by, “henderob,” I would very much like to thank you for saying the individuals with disabilities would be the only ones to take stock in the possibility of a deity out side of the Christian, Judaic system of beliefs, even though there are millions of Hindi, and Muslims. These religions have been practicing for most of history (meaning recorded history). In fact Christianity is not even the most practiced, oldest, or uniform religion. But hey what do I know really do have a disability (Asperger’s Syndrome.)
On a side note perhaps that makes individuals with disabilities more intelligent then you are sir, and I know for a fact that many have better grammatical skills.
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Loli Popoff– exactly! Let us not presume to know what’s best for the whole wide world, lest we become just as hypocritical as our fundie friends. (No idea why I wrote that weird. It’s been a long day, haha.)
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Dread Wench L’TUAE– ^_^ Thanks!
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RAmen OEJ RAmen
I’m running out of RAmens people, stop ogreeing with each other so much!
What happened to Thumpy I miss Thumpy!
And Mike, it’s sad to say but I miss Mike too.
Where are all of our precious trolls? I love trolls so much!
I’m bored
^.^)>
^(^.^)^
v(^.^)v
RAmen
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But we do realize that “henderob” is only posting the mail he gets here right?
He didn’t write that, he is the prophet of the FSM, only sharing his mail with us.
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Pixely pop dude!
I read somewhere else that Thump and Mike.
Ran away together to get married and make little gay bunnie wabbits.
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I don’t know, what’s wrong with you?
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Hiya Lolli. Poor old Bobby getting the blame again :)
Thumper and Mike eh? Miserable bugger didn’t invite me to the wedding. I tell you, you go out of your way to be nice to someone and they don’t even invite you to a free piss-up! Scandalous. Nothing more than scandalous!
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@Pixel Pop: If you’re really desperate for a troll, I’m sure I can stand in until the next angry fundy/self-obsessed egomaniac turns up:
*Takes deep breath*
you are all CRAZY *£%@s who do obscene THINGS with OARS and ARE GOING TO HELL unless you REPENT to (Insert Deity of Choice) who LOVES you VERY MUCH.
P.S. i ATE your GOD last NIGHT!!!1!1!!
I can do supercilious git too:
Look, it’s not your fault that you’re all stupid and believe in a fake spaghetti god. I’m an aetheist, so I’m better than you all, which is good, because otherwise I’d have to treat you like human beings.
P.S. I have a girlfriend… honestly…
On second thoughts, I’d really rather not keep this up.
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I know Alchemist, and you were nice to him and everything!
Just brings me back to what I’ve said all along…
He’s a bitch!
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@One eyed jack Feb 1st, 2007 at 3:26 pm
“In regards to the post by, “henderob,—
OEJ??? Doesn’t sound like you?
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LET ME TRY….. U R ALLL ************ U STUPPIDD ********** ********** ********* HAHAHA ************* **************8 *************!
HAHAHAHAHA OARS ********** HAHAHA
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This is my first posting, although I discovered the site and the One and True God-The FSM about a month ago. Until that glorius moment of noodly clarity, I had been blindly following the teachings of Founder Ryan, leader (in the pharmacy I work in) of the Posiedonites, followers of the (I now know false) God Posiedon, God of the oceans and of horses( who knew?). Since being touched by His Noodly Appendage, I have found the true path to living a good and decent life. I went right out and purchased the Gospel of the FSM, because as everyone knows you can’t have a religion without a book, other wise how would you know what is right and what is wrong? I hope to get to know you fellow Pastafarians better in the future! Aaaarrrggh, & Ramen! Oh, yeah and pass the grog to me too, I practicaly grew up on a sail boat, was even shipwrecked once and can probably drink most of you males under the table as well!
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Welcome Ta-Tech, May you be forever touched.
Oh yeah, I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last night.
Ramen
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I’m thinking that some Pastafarians who decide that they no longer believe in monsters or monsterism may want to kiss and make up with God. Here’s some advice on how by way of a “burnt offering”. Women often say that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach and the “all mighty” is no exception.
Leviticus 8:19
“This burned offering was a food offering, and it’s odor was pleasing to the Lord.”
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But what does God eat I hear you say? You may appease your significant other with a box of Belgium chockies but God is not quite so easy to please. Try this one:
Leviticus 8:25-26
“He took the fat, the fat tail, all the fat covering the internal organs, the best part of the liver, the kidneys with the fat on them, the right hind leg. Then he took one loaf of bread from the basket of unleavened bread dedicated to the Lord, one loaf made with oil, and one thin cake, and he put them on top of the fat and the right hind leg.”
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This is the kind of sandwich that God likes. Please note that Ram was used in the above example but Bible Scholars (like me) believe that any animal of the clean non rock badger variety will be ok. If you are watching your weight you are best advised to continue getting sandwiches from Subway…the almighty probably has his own personal trainer.
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Hope this has helped.
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if i want to kill and sacrifice for a blood-soaked monster-god, i’ll go eviscerate my local priest and offer his organs to sweet Cthulhu in hopes of merciful annhialation of the universe. until then, i’ll stick with peace-loving atheism/FSMism, thanks.
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That was not OEJ, I am sure. Please, my friend, think of another “handle”. That one is already taken. You can use One Eyed Fred.
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@Homo narrans
I’m no FSM expert but wouldn’t “eviscerate my local priest and offer his organs to sweet Cthulhu” be in direct contravention of one of the “I’d rather you didn’ts”? Would the FSM punish you or does the FSM turn a blind appendage to breaking his rules?
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Thump, you pissed Alchemist off!
Why didn’t you invite him to your wedding?
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@Thumper
the events described are what i predict would happen should i ever turn from the light of FSM/atheism and take up the following of a blood-drinking interstellar monster such as Cthulhu or the Christian God. since am a pastafarian at the moment, however, i have no cause to do such things.
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Homo narrans . Sorry mate, you can keep Cthulhu and chaos magic. I’m mad enough without it :)
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Thumper. You’re like the Candy Man :). Say your name in the mirror three times and you arrive! How goes it?
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no sweat alchemist, i wasn’t planning on unleashing anything here. though you have to admit…there is a certain noodley quality to those monstrous Old Ones…?
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Quoth The One True Bible:
God 1:1 Figure it out for yourselves.
God 1:2 Don’t pick on people so much.
God 1:3 We’ll talk more when you’re dead.
Discover its awesome power at TheOneTrueBible.com.
Tithe often.
God
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@Alchemist
Nice to see you again. I have 40 cm ears that burn when people talk about me. Who said what and when? Otherwise I am well and alive…evidence that the Lord approves of what I’m doing here among the sinners.
@Lolli
Huh??? Wedding??? It warms my heart to see that you are well and in the condition that I last left you.
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@Thumper: You know, your marriage to MIKE.
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What were the two of you thinking, not inviting anyone from here after spending so much time on this site?
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It really was a huge disappointment.
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@Greenbeard
Oh I see…been too busy to read over old posts so this delightfully engaging piece of wit escaped my notice…how was the wedding anyway? Did Mike wear white?…I’m guessing white’s not Mike’s colour. If Mike and I do decide to tie the knot you’ll be the first to know…fortunately being a rabid “fundy” I can’t live with him or “get funky” until we’re married and his surgery is finalised.
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Homo narrans. hahaha. Yeah, Cthulhu does have a certain noodle like appearance. Bit too scary for me though. I’ll stick to, well, the floor if I don’t do some housework soon :)
Ooh, full moon, I feel the urge to howl! Oooooooow
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Thump, how many of you are in there anyway?
And how do you fit with all those oars?
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@ Alchemist
“I’ll stick to, well, the floor if I don’t do some housework soon :)”
I’ve heard, that if you bind the appropriate wet cloths to a crawling baby’s hands and knees, it can do an excellent job of cleaning the floor.
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JonL. Hahahahaha. I’ll have to borrow the neighbours kid then. Mine has four legs and barks a lot :)
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@Lolli P
Q: What’s the difference between a tree?
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A: An icecream because it doesn’t have windows.
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Thump.
Your wit and smartfulness really impresses me.
If I wern’t watching tv, I’d discuss with you, just stick around we’ll chat.
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Ooh, ooh. Time for my favourite (clean) joke, again.
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Soccer score
Real Madrid, 1 : Surreal Madrid, fish
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Thank you, thank you. No, your too kind. The applause is deafening me :)
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@Thumper Feb 1st, 2007 at 6:49 pm
Don’t you think that is getting a little too deep?
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@Lolli
“Your wit and smartfulness really impresses me.”
Honestly I’m touched…After you’ve finished watching your re runs of “America’s Biggest Loser” perhaps you could give me your thoughts on Proverbs 12:10
“A good man takes care of his animals, but wicked men are cruel to theirs”…do you think that this would apply to unclean animals like a rock badger or a mythical animal like the FSM?
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Ok, my tv show is over, lets discuss.
BTW, Hi Nikkiee, hope you’re doing Ok.
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Thump, you shouldn’t call yourself an animal.
Is that what your parents told you you were?
That would explain a lot! It would!
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@Lolli
Alas I am not who you think I am…I’m just me. I can’t specifically recall whether my parents called me an animal growing up but the lingerie model says it a lot…is this bad??? Should I leave her for Mike??? Is that offer for you to bear my bastard children still open??? What would God say??? What would the FSM say???
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Thump, I know who you are. I think you should run with the offer from Mike.
I’ll wager he’s prettier then your Langoler model.
IIRC, those langoleirs were kind of ugly.
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@Lolli
I’m not Wench Nikkiee if that’s what you’re suggesting…she’s way smarter then me. Who am I then?…and what’s a “Langoler/Langoleir”??? I’d stay and chat but you’re not making any sense again. Were you exposed to any experimental weapons during your time in the service? You know…some kind of heat ray or Jacobs Ladder style combat drugs???
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Thumper. Not too sure about Mike! I think you could do better. The rectal damage alone! Reconsider. Stick with what you know!
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Run off now hoppie, again I’ll say I know who you are.
Why did you think I called you Nikkiee? I adressed Cap’n Fly,
when I said hi, or are you Cap’n Fly too?
Anyway, yeah run off now, I’m sure things are pressing.
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@Homo Narrans: ‘there is a certain noodley quality to those monstrous Old Ones…’
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I’ve noticed this too. Could it be that the FSM is older than the God of the Bible? I’m sure most of us always thought that this was the case, but what a shock for the Jesus Christers!!!
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I will Paypal, three dollars and forty seven cents USD.
To the first person that brings a fundie to this site.
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Ok here’s the deal. Anyone that knows me on this site knows that i don’t go spouting off at the lip and talking shit to people just because i’m online and know they can’t do anything about it. But i’m about to do a little braging. I graduated from Clemson University in South Carolina. I’ll admit that my degree doesn’t mean much, but one thing i learnded at Clemson was how to drink.
There has been alot of talk about drinking people under the table. Normally i’m not one to brag or talk shit online, but i’m pretty sure i can take just about anybody. I spent more time playing asshole and fuck the dealer and beer pong and flip cup than i ever spent studying.
I know i can’t prove anything online… but once we get our pirate ship i challange anyone who is willing to a drinking contest. We can start with power hour and go from there. Anyone that can survive power hour and still drink deserves to be in the ring. I anxiously await any challenges that may arise. Good day wenches and gentlemen.
Dr. Worm
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hahaha
Your on, Dr Worm!
I spent half my life in the roman catholic church!
I’ll drink your ass into next tuesday!
hahaha
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It seems to me that we are beginning to develop two “tendencies†here. The first I would call “Tolerationist†which says that there’s nothing wrong with your religion so long as you don’t try to stuff it down my throat and the second is the “Dawkinsian†which says that all religion is pernicious and should be opposed when and wherever it is found.
There are problems with both positions.
So far as the Tolerationists are concerned do you allow the religious to brainwash their children or is it (like sex) something parents should only do behind closed doors?
If you think about it sex is natural and satisfying (or should be) whereas religion closes the mind, teaches an unjustified superiority complex (all religions claim to exclusively know “The Truthâ€) and has a history of persecution and proselytising (ok Judaism doesn’t actively proselytise and I don’t call Theravadan Buddhism a religion, it’s a philosophy). Yet if parents had sex in front of their children even a tenth as often as most of them talk about religion they’d be locked up as paedophiles or have the kids taken into “care†(kidnapped by the state would be more accurate).
So is the above something the Tolerationists are prepared to tolerate or is there a limit to their toleration of religious practice?
The “Dawkinsians†however are in danger of being accused of precisely the type of fundamentalism which we so deplore in the christian fundies. The big problem is that if we admit that religion should be opposed (as RD himself argues) is it legitimate to categorically attack other opinions that people may hold? The answer should be “No†because if I think the Grateful Dead are better than Frank Zappa it merely reveals that I’ve taken too many drugs but nobody’s going to get burned at the stake for it. (OK The Dead’s tunes are better but Zappa was a far greater musician believe me).
But if you admit that it is possible to make an exception to things that you’re going to be cool about, ie single out religion for your active opposition there is a danger of becoming like those single-issue politicians that nobody takes seriously.
I don’t know what the answer is but the question seems worth raising.
BTW does anyone else think we should find a name for them which doesn’t contain the word “Fun†(perhaps just the ’mentals) ’cos the ones who post on here are no fun at all (except for taunting)
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is it legitimate to categorically attack other opinions that people may hold? The answer should be “Noâ€
It depends if said opinions infringe on the rights of others or not. I support the right of anyone to believe whatever shit they like, but they shouldn’t be tolerated sticking it down anyone’s throat – mine, yours or their children’s. But the thing is that their beliefs directly go against that, because the ‘mentals (i like the name) beliefs include actively forcing it on other people. There’s no real way to reconcile my live and let live strategy with what they try to do.
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I’ve always thought fund a mental was appropriate. The cult leaders are always asking for money.
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YAY… another lover of the good stuff! I haven’t heard much Zappa (but have seen that crazy dvd with the claymation… WOW), but FSMdang, the Grateful Dead are the bee’s knees, monkey’s uncle, and donkey’s testicles!
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On BobfromEngland
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You have sex in front of your kids???
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:D A good point, but not exactly right, for 1 these are two ends of a spectrum, it’s not black and white, I’d like to think I stand between those 2 points, I don’t like kids to be forced into religion, but I don’t fully side with Dawkins…
…RAmen…
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@Jingles Feb 2nd, 2007 at 5:26 am
“but FSMdang, the Grateful Dead are the bee’s knees, monkey’s uncle, and donkey’s testicles!”
But not quite the Mothers of Invention!
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I am pretty tolerant, up to certain points. I don’t care if people go to church on sunday or believe in some god or the other. But my tolerance ends when they try and force it on me, or when they try to stop me from going out on sunday because it is a “holy” day. THEN I will stop being tolerant and charge back.
*
I mean, i’m tolerant of people believing abortion or gay mariage is evil, people do have a right to opinions about it (whether i agree with their opinion or not)(i don’t). I draw the line however at people trying to stop others from having one, or getting married because it is against their beliefs.
*
I am always a bit against trying to make me choose between one or the other. There are more colours than black and white.
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I will follow the trail of his sauceyness, in hopes of being touched by his noodly appendage. Might I ask some of you have seen him, so I have a heads up on where to go?
RAmen
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@Popoff your on!!! This should be a good match. My ex girlfriend was catholic and she could drink like a fish. You people are a credit to drinkers everywhere. Just name your terms and preferred games and get ready to have your ass handed to you.
Drunk Worm
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I think Hell is Nebraska…
I’ve heard it’s pretty boring there, and no one said Hell absolutely had to be torturous maybe it’s just boring.
Either Nebraska is Hell or it’s the edge of the world, and you will fall off if you drive through.
RAmen
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OR…Hell is Woodland High School. You know, the food sucks, Satan calls the cops after every fight, your not allowed to hang up signs, and the food just plain sucks.
RAmen
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I think I’d rather go to Hell than Heaven.
In every other religion Heaven is perfect, and after awile perfection gets boring.
At least in Hell there’s something going on, surre it’s endless torture, but torture never gets boring…
Unless it is in Nebraska.
RAmen
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A drinking contest between Lolli and Dr. Worm eh? I know who my money’s on. Can I join in? I could represent England, it’s our National Sport!
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“after awile perfection gets boring.”
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it’s one of those little things that no christian ever seems to take into account. when things are in a state of sheer perfection, there’s no impetus to do anything at all. every human action is, at some level, driven by the desire for change one’s circumstances. if there was no reason to alter anything, however, what does that leave you with? an eternity of boring, static subservience.
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@Alchemist-absolutey you can join, the more participants in a drinking contest the better. Although i have to admit i think you might have a slight advantage coming from england. Although if you look it up, Clemson is usaully in the top five party schools in many of the polls out there, including playboy i think. And while i was there i majored in drinking. So bring it on chumps, i’m willing to kill every last brain cell to win. The great thing about drinking contests is that there are no losers, everyone ends up drunk.
you just name the time and the place (as long as its on a weekend and in greenville SC) and i’ll be there. (BTW i have mostly Irish blood so watch out) Later fellas!
Dr.Worm
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Worshipping Poland…Actually, if I wasn’t a devout Pastafarian, that’d be a pretty awesome religion. Mmmhmm.
I hope that the FSM reaches you with His Noodly Appendage, my poor, uneducated friend.
RAmen
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been busy and so have you all on here, so i’ll include the bit i’m replying to to make it pertinent:
Iron Gill Kid:”…“If we concede that a deist is harmless, and entiltled to hold his beliefs how can you then criticise a more extreme believer?†Because there IS a difference between the two. The first diest isn’t bothering you or anyone else. The second diest is. Everyone has the right to believe whatever they want, until they try to push it on others. You don’t have to like, or even respect their beliefs. You can absolutly abhore them. For instance, I loathe what the KKK think, and couldn’t respect them LESS if I tried–but until they come to my door and start ranting they have the right to think what they think…”
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Difficult as it is, i’m going to disagree here. You are arguing from the result of a belief rather than the cause. Essentially stating one belief is ok, even though based on a fallacy, because you find the result of it morally and socially acceptable. this is subjective and dependant on your point of view. Why should one belief that is based on superstitious nonsense be tolerated more than another? I see that you base your criteria basically on “are they bothering anyone?” or the pagan “do what thou wilt, so long as it harms none”. nice warm fuzzy sentimental feeling, but entirely subjective on the person being “bothered”. My argument is based from a first principle, it is blatantly untrue, yet portrays itself as truth, moreover they claim to be the one real truth. This should be exposed, countered, and argued against. it matters not a jot whether they quietly hum in a corner, or shout about it on a high street. It is a lie, and they seek to perpetuate it.
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So we can conclude that even FSM Heaven will eventually get boring. I mean Beer and Strippers are fun and all but not for the rest of eternity. Maybe if the great FSM upgraded Heaven every now and then, things could get a little more interesting.
Oh and as for Hell…
You can’t say FSM has no reason to punish people. Look at this world, it’s crap, there’s plenty of people to fill up Hell. How about this we send them all to boring Heaven, and we’ll take the more exciting Hell.
RAmen
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Spider, the problem with your logic, although it is perfectly sensible to me, is that it is based on the “fact” that the existence of God is “blatantly untrue.” For some, it is not a fact that God does not exist. And, since we can’t prove that God does not exist, hard to prove a negative, then their faith that He/She does exist has to be given some credence.
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Marc McOar you rock.
I love the company of people with great logic.
RAmen
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Dr Worm “And while i was there i majored in drinking.”
Did we read the same first degree (Chemistry)? I liked the first year so much I did it again :)
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I think that it’s just hot air about drinking destroying brain cells. Probably a methodist propaganda scam. I mean, look at Lolli and me. Hasn’t does us any harm!
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@BobfromEngland
Nice post, and in many ways true, but you neglected the fact that our opinions are more on a continuum than trapped in black and white. I personally am somewhere in between the two groups you have proposed, believing in the right to follow religions if one desires but NOT the right to force it on anyone else (including their children). Everyone here is somewhere along the line, but I doubt that anyone falls completely into one category.
RAmen
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I feel good with the FSM religion… better than with others
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@Gnocci Man.
Well said that man! I agree with you completely.
Believe what you like, not my problem. Just don’t shove it down my throat and expect me to come around to your way of thinking.
RAmen
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Alchemist Feb 2nd, 2007 at 11:28 am
I think that it’s just hot air about drinking destroying brain cells. Probably a methodist propaganda scam. I mean, look at Lolli and me. Hasn’t does us any harm!
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hahaha! Thats right! No damage here.
To bad we couldn’t have an honest contest online,
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Afternoon Lolli.
“To bad we couldn’t have an honest contest online,”
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Weeelll. We could hook our camcorders etc up as web cams, buy the same brand of beer, not sure if I can get yours over here, but Stella’s 5.2 ABV. Have to make it invitation only though, ‘cos at some point I’ll end-up mooning for the camera. hahaha (seriously! One day I’ll grow up, but that’s not today :))
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Well, Alchemist and Lolli, it is Friday, and therefore a holy day. One must get naked and get drunk, but not necessarily in that order.
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“I’ll end-up mooning for the camera.”
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haha, Not sure I want to see that!
The camera idea is a thought though…
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Hey Marc, thanks for reminding me about it being a holy day. I’d honestly forgotten.
I’ll now start to praise our Lord, the great FSM, in the way he has prescribed. BEER! ps it’s 1920 over here. I’ve started without you :)
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Do you ever think it’s possible that this is just a different way of accepting christianity?
Think about it, it takes christianity and changes it into something more favorable…
RAmen
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The Narrator Feb 2nd, 2007 at 1:06 pm
Do you ever think it’s possible that this is just a different way of accepting christianity?
Think about it, it takes christianity and changes it into something more favorable…
RAmen
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Huh?
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“Do you ever think it’s possible that this is just a different way of accepting christianity?”
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no, not really. in any way at all. christianity is about thought-control. FSM is a satire designed to show the absurdity of teaching faith as if it were fact.
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Hi Narrator. No I don’t. How can you change christianity? That is the belief in christ! You might as well say that Islam is the same, just with a different name for the lamb of god! Lambule would not be happy with that.
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Why lambs btw? Silly animals with the herd mentality. Was someone taking the piss with that. Perhaps it was meant as a ‘grow up, stand on your own two feet and stop following the crowd” thing.
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I’m probably wrong!
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No. it’s in no way connected to christianity. I’m having a beer, soon I will get myself a second beer.
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@Marc, your logic is very impressive, RAmen brother!
@Fellow drinkers- i don’t have a webcam and even if i did i dont think i would want to sit in front of my computer by myself and drink for hours at a time. I think i would get bored and give up. We need to figure something out though…
Dr. Worm
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I tend to agree Dr Worm.
As a side note, I just popped the top on my third bottle.
Let the games begin…
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Hello everybody, I am Peter (Lolli) Popoffs daughter. I have been reading here as long as my dad has been posting here. This is my first post and probably my last after he reads this. :)) But I want to say. Please don’t challenge him to a drinking contest. I don’t think mom has enough bail money this time. :))
RAmen
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@Lil’ Popoff
Your dad’s a fine laddie, but there’s always a bigger fish when it comes to drinking. I’m Irish Scottish and German so I’d wager I could beat him, despite age handicaps blah blah blah.
If he can’t afford the bail that’s okay, I’ve got some illegal mints in my basement that I could print off a couple thousand dollars with^.^
RAmen
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Arrrrrrrrr!! I’ve been scrolling through these miles of blogs. Me head hurts! My question, after reading all this is………is there a future for mankind?….just jot…just a tittle? Please…FSM is a fine religion. I am a believer. Makes mores sense to me than Christianity. And I am a pirate with full regalia so it fits in nicely. I also have a sailboat which I am thinking of renaming “Breakwind” as I am now a pirate and it seems to fit so nicely. I do notice, also, than when wearing me pirate outfit, the temperature around me drops just a jot….just a tittle. See…pirates are cool. They do affect the temperature and reduce global warming. Wait…..am I rambling again. I knew it ! Ramen you lubbers…..
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I’m currently drinking homemade stout. It needs more time to condition.
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I would also like to challenge Popoff to a drinking contest!
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Hahahaha
Smart ass kid!
Your grounded!
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@Petey
Tsk tsk, what’s the matter, don’t think you could beat me at a drinkin’ competition?
Let’s not ground our children, children!
RAmen
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*cluck*
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I’ll take all comers! I’m full of European blood.
Aided by years of catholicism, you folks don’t stand a chance!
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@ Wenchette C. Popoff Feb 2nd, 2007 at 2:30 pm
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HAHAHAHA! Hiya C. You ok?
Lolli – full of European blood eh? Can I have some, mine’s full of ethanol (I’ve got five hours on you!)
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I haven’t even had one yet :(
It’s Friday evening FFS! I am supposed to be relaxing and I haven’t stopped! The bath is going cold and I am eating too much chocolate, and if I’m pregnant I am going to be really pissed off!
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Alchemist Feb 2nd, 2007 at 2:51 pm
@ Wenchette C. Popoff Feb 2nd, 2007 at 2:30 pm
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HAHAHAHA! Hiya C. You ok?
Lolli – full of European blood eh? Can I have some, mine’s full of ethanol (I’ve got five hours on you!)
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Hahahaha I know Alchemist . What can I do? The law says I can’t beat her.
Don’t worry, I just popped #5, I’ll catch up!
Ramen
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Lolli. I’d say crack open a bottle for her but people might complain :)
Ha, and some people doubt genetics hahaha
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@Wenchette C. Popoff
Good to see the daughter of one of our pastafarian prodigees (read: people with a lot of spare time)! Sit down, have some pasta, and enjoy!
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Booty “I am supposed to be relaxing ”
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I’m going to be as relaxed as a newt soon. Get in that bath, chill, smoke some…..wha you might be pregnant? Has the FSM been busy? You didn’t pet a swan did you?
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Well, you must be doing something right Lolli – at least she can type and spell and knows where the capslock key is! Oh, and she has a sense of humour too!
She seems like she will make a fine wench to me!
I am sure if they did a DNA test on Lolli and Alchemist they would come up with an awful lot of the same genes!
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Mock all you want, you will come to regret it before moments of your death.
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Gnocci Man “read: people with a lot of spare time”
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Self-employed and unemployed are two very different things. We self-employed get away with charging silly money for doing nothing. Capitalism. You’ve got to love it!
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Have nice day and may God forgive you for your mockery. =D
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I have recently been searching through the internet for site that might interest people of our persuation, and am about to post a few links. bear with me, I’ll try to only put in the best (or worst, depending)
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Wow, well, a lot of action here so I’ll try to say everything I meant to, and sorry if I miss someone!
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BobfromEngland—haha, I guess I’m a Tolorrationist? “So is the above something the Tolerationists are prepared to tolerate or is there a limit to their toleration of religious practice?†Of course there is. The limit comes the minute you shove your faith onto someone else. I have the right to believe, but I don’t have the right to make you believe. When it comes to indoctrinating your kids, well…to me, a parent has every right to teach their children about their religion. I plan on sending my kids once they exist to Hebrew school, and to explain to them what it is to be jewish. But I don’t have the right to make them believe as I do. If they decide along the way to be Muslim, or atheist, or whatever, then that’s their choice to make.
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As Red DutchPasta Kidd said, “But my tolerance ends when they try and force it on me, or when they try to stop me from going out on sunday because it is a “holy†day. THEN I will stop being tolerant and charge back.†If a day is holy for me, I’m gonna be hanging out at home. But I can’t stop others from going out and partying it up, nor would I want to.
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Navigator Spider—I get what you’re saying. But I disagree entirely. What right do you have to tell me—or anyone—that, because TO YOU my beliefs are stupid, I can’t believe in them? The world is not the black-and-white place you seem to think it is. Yes, religion in the hands of SOME PEOPLE can be used to cause evil—but in the hands of most people it’s just a part of their life.
It’s a bit like saying that, (randomly made-up example ahead:) because studies have shown that people who drive red cars get into more accidents, red cars should be banned. There’s no real REASON for you to want a red car (there’s no evidence that suggests red is better then other colors, right?), the ‘adrenaline rush’ (or whatever, hahah) could even be dangerous, and people have done bad things while driving red cars, so let’s ban the car. It doesn’t make sense that because some people are idiotic, everyone else has to give up what those morons used to be stupid.
Basically, when it comes down to it you have no right to get in my face and bug me about my beliefs if they’re not affecting you. Have a problem with religious believers? Take it up with the fundies shoving their bibles down your throat. If we could just learn to live and let live…
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“it matters not a jot whether they quietly hum in a corner, or shout about it on a high street. It is a lie, and they seek to perpetuate it.†But what if they don’t? What if they just want to be able to live their lives without having some atheist—or whoever—swoop down on them and drive them insane?
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Taking it upon yourself to change the world into your idea of better, when a lot of the world really doesn’t give a shit and just wants to be able to get on with their lives, is the same thing as taking it upon yourself to convert the masses and remove the presence of all those heathen atheist scum. I don’t care what you believe or why you believe it, nothing gives you the right to affront people and INSIST that, since they’re being soo stupid, they have to change to fit your idea of perfect better.
—–
I hope that didn’t come off as sounding nasty! I’m not actually pissed, just getting into the conversation.
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Well, that was the longest post of my career.
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SRA– Go away. You’re inturrpting the debate. Intellegent people are discussing religion and…booze, was it? I scimmed some posts.
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@Alchemist
I know, I never said I didn’t have too much spare time myself (actually, “too much spare time” is a paradoxical contradiction). RAmen to you!
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anyway, here’s the first of the links:
http://www.ethicalatheist.com/docs/questions_for_god.html
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Booty “I am sure if they did a DNA test on Lolli and Alchemist they would come up with an awful lot of the same genes!”
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Now that’s a worry! Although if they checked my DNA against your’s they’d find the same. Are we all related?
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Random Visitor. You going to stay and play or are you going to be a drive by poster?
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SRA? Meant SRV. Bleh.
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And now one of the scary ones.
http://www.jesus-is-lord.com/
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Gnocci Man. Wasn’t having a dig at you btw. We need emoticons on this site! I re-read my posts and end up thinking “well, that sounded a bit twatty!” just assume I’m being daft, it’s usually easiest :)
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Booty Feb 2nd, 2007 at 3:22 pm
Well, you must be doing something right Lolli – at least she can type and spell and knows where the capslock key is! Oh, and she has a sense of humour too!
She seems like she will make a fine wench to me!
I am sure if they did a DNA test on Lolli and Alchemist they would come up with an awful lot of the same genes!
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Thanks Booty, she’s fifteen.
She has been a pain in my ass, since the day she started talking! hahaha
That post surprized the crap out of me though. Smart ass brats!
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I’m not sure if she’s mine or not? Ask Alchemist, she looks enough like her mother to have been self conceived? hahaha
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Iron gill Kidd Feb 2nd, 2007 at 3:28 pm
Well, that was the longest post of my career.
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SRA– Go away. You’re inturrpting the debate. Intellegent people are discussing religion and…booze, was it? I scimmed some posts.
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Booze it was! Gill, I just popped the top on #6.
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Ha ha ha ha ha! I just came across this…..
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http://sedition.com/ddx/w/1843.html
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RAmen!
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Meh, I’m just a drive by poster, I have more important things to do at the moment, might come later depending on if the people here are actually intelligent or not, we’ll see. But overall, hey, not a bad way to convince people that religious philosophy is wrong, by appealing to their humor and sarcasm and not even sifting over the weightier matters. I like it; it’s so simple yet crafty at the same time…
Anyway, the Flying Spaghetti Monster loves sheeple. Peace out sheeple. =D
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Gnocci Man – ta for the link. Wouldn’t let me subscribe to their mailing list! Sods.
#6 Lolli? I’m into #5, mine are 500ml jobs though!
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jesus is lord.com is funny! No sanity or reason to be seen.
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LOL Alchemist – I am sure we are all one big happy dysfunctional family!
@ Lolli – 15! I sometimes can’t wait until mine are that old – and sometimes it fills me with terror! Daniel had his first “date” today – he’s 6!
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Some Random Visitor
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Not called Ed are you :)
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wow, SRV really humbled us with his far superior intellect
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@Some Random Visitor Feb 2nd, 2007 at 3:22 pm
“Mock all you want, you will come to regret it before moments of your death.”
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Why’s that??
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Alchemist Feb 2nd, 2007 at 3:47 pm
Gnocci Man – ta for the link. Wouldn’t let me subscribe to their mailing list! Sods.
#6 Lolli? I’m into #5, mine are 500ml jobs though!
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Mina are only 354ml “12 oz”.
But you’ve got five hours on me too! haha
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Hehehe, thanks Cap’n.
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Booty – “Daniel had his first “date†today – he’s 6!”
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Wow. I’ll buy him a cigar (no, not good. A big spliff then :))
Like I’ve said, the only baby I’ve got has four legs, barks and has a taste for human flesh. Don’t think I could do the children thing – FFS I’m not exactly mature myself hahaha.
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I hope you told Daniel to be careful!
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I can quite safely say that as a nurse I have seen quite a few people die, and they usually are too far gone to know they are about to pop their clogs so I don’t think they are regretting anything at that point – their brains are too busy trying to keep them breathing.
The only people who have known they are dying have also had other things on their minds – like how much pain they are in, or whether their daughter is coming to see them or not.
I haven’t known anyone say “Oh bother, I wish I hadn’t taken the piss out of…”
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Ha!
~7 660ml!
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Booty Feb 2nd, 2007 at 3:50 pm
Daniel had his first “date†today – he’s 6!
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haha, first date. Enjoy those years Booty, it’s a blast watching them grow and learn.
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LOL! I have been too busy trying not to laugh when he told me they were getting married!
I suppose I should buy him some condoms….;)
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I’m kidding, It’s 2 at 660ml and 4.5%(ish)
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Oh yes! A blast! I can hardly wait until the knocks on the door from irate parents! ;)
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You be careful in that cupboard Beastly!
It will be tricky to get out of if you get too tiddly! Any luck with that student yet? ;)
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Where have we heard “sheeple” before?? *vomiting sound*
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