You’re going to hell for degrading god to a pile of noodles. Have fun burning for an eternity. -Erik Vavro
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
@Alchemist
Did you know that apparently one of the side effects of Viagra is vision loss? My grandmother’s prediction coming true…
who said that, eh, where are you? I’ve just got to shave my palms Batman!
@Alchemist
HA HA HA HA… funny, yet disturbing mental image of hairy palms… :-S
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I’m in Canada, eh. =) Self abuse not only leads to furtive palm shaving, but also blindness… *snicker
@Batman
“Is anyone interested in explaining to me how “GOD†is meant to be God, The Son of God, The Holy Ghost, The Spirit, The Lamb of God, and however many other things he is?”
The trinity thing is a piece of very bad math on the part of religious people. You have the father, one. The son, another one. And the holy spirit, yet another one. And then they all form this single thing called the trinity. So 1 + 1 + 1 = 1. Like other things in Christianity, it doesn’t add up.
DutchPastaGuy,
It’s simple really, like that American politician said…
It’s fuzzy math.
DPG - You need more Sunday School - I teach it on a Thursday if you like :)
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The three in one is a borrowed belief Soma, Pneuma and Psyche - body, soul and mind - should be in a different order but can’t be arsed changing it.
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God (xtian one) is all three. Three was a perfect number in those days, purity I think. So the bible was reinterpreted to include that. A bit like saying you had all of the winning numbers for the lottery after it was drawn :)
7 is also a holy number, that’s why 666 is the number of the beast. A perfect imperfection.
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@Batman - Canada? I have relatives in Vancouver! We don’t keep in contact much, but Canada sounds a nice place (not Quebec though hahahaha)
Ah - the trinity - it is a bit like a shamrock leaf - 3 leaves but 1 leaf - apparently.
Total bollocks of course, but a good one for earning your “I can believe 6 impossible things before breakfast” points.
Well Batman, “GOD” is True Life on Himself. You can’t define God by gender, age or space. He is. That means that nothing can determine God into a certain direction, any form or attitude. He just is, like He has always been the same.
Since time and space have no impact on Him, we can understand that God has existed always and can be everywhere where He determines Himself to be. In fact He is the never-ending Beginning, knowing all, always and everywhere. He knows all things to come as all things that are in the past. All things have been created by God. Even the concept of evil thoughts and actions are a creation of His great mind.
You may ask why all things are as they are right now; a sick world dying, when this reality is not to be assumed according to Gods intention of Love and Perfection. The answer is clear: man is being sucked into damnation by his own evil desires. The one evil desire that forms the foundation of all evil desires is the desire to be independently from God. The underlying lie is that freedom comes within the independence from God. In fact the devil is always trying to deceive us by telling us that we, ourselves, would be capable to look out for ourselves, arousing vanity in us. But the undeniable truth is that no creation can be appreciated by its own means. For the finger cannot point the finger without the eye. As the finger cannot see the point and the eye cannot point without the finger.
As the Creator is free of choice and knowing right from wrong, so is His finest creation equiped with the freedom of choice and knowledge of the good and the bad. As you all know, Genesis begins with the history of Adam en Eve, choosing to disobey to God and obeying to the desire to be apart of God, as gods independently from God. For God had given man the knowledge of one bad thing – picking the apple – to give man choice in this fashion man would have the smallest burden possible to bear; to obey God and not picking that apple.
The consequence of disobedience to God results into death!
I don’t have to mention that all physical creatures die in the end. Even the finest metal would degenerate in time floating into the vacuous as it is influenced by its solitude existence.
So, when we are talking of God, first we have to conclude He is the Creator, the Beginning and the End, Everlasting, Righteous, True and Almighty. Since He has more names than these, I’ll explain why He has revealed Himself to be the Son of God; the Lamb of God; the Holy Ghost, and Spirit of Truth.
Since God has created all things, it is imaginable He created everything in order that the most important of all creations would be prevailing to be as wise and as perfect, eternal, everlasting as the Creator is that all. But since we would all make the choice to ‘try’ to make it on our own, without God, we are destined to die. Is this the plan of the Almighty God? Can’t God create anything that is worthy in the eyes of God? What kind of sadist is this God, that has never though of an idea to save us from this tragic destiny? No, just wait a minute, this is it, folks! “Where is the Love in what we consider to be God of Heavens?†God has been pulled down to some god who is not caring at all. Instead He ALWAYS gave us the way out from this tragic destiny! Every book in the old testament defines the Love of merciful God by the Promise of Salvation. He is promising salvation to Adam and Eve and all fathers of the Jewish people. Even now, Jews are awaiting their messiah apart from Jesus, who is to them mere a deceiver.
God explains in the scriptures that all who had faith in Him by trusting in His Promise of eternal life, are being justified by this faith. Even when those who have been saved by the promise, never actually knew what kind of salvation God had in mind, they accepted God to be the Loving Father as He is for all of his children.
The gospel says that Jesus is indeed God in the flesh, Who had died for ALL mankind in order that we would have eternal life. It is written that Jesus already promised to give His life for us, in the first days of His creation. Was God in fact that loving that He would even forgive us our sins before we even could sin? Yes, it is the Truth.
Jesus has made a merit of eternal life because He had never sinned, so He was declared to be worthy to bear the burden of the sin of all man. Imagine that the Son of God has earned the right to inherit all Power from God, being a Man Himself. For God is Spirit and Jesus proclaimed Himself to be the Word of God, we can conclude, He was in fact fully possessed by the Holy Spirit, God Himself.
So He died and received punishment for all unrighteousness that has been committed by man. Than He has died, after even He was forsaken by His Own Father – the gravest punishment possible – , and then He sat for three days in the outmost bottom of the world of the death, being tormented by the devil. After those three days He rose again, having defeated the devil, risen from the dead. Forty days He spent with His disciples and hundreds of people saw Him being revived. Finally He was taken back to the Father in the Spirit. The Spirit, Who is God, He has given us to lead us into Salvation, after He made it possible for us, sinners, to receive Gods Spirit by taking away the burden of sin that results into death, so we would be holy and without a trace of guilt.
Now all children of God have received the courage to be not ashamed standing before God, when this world ends in the eternal damnation of spiritual darkness, because God finds no evil in them, since they are relying on the promise that once this wicked world has come to an end, they will receive all knowledge and goodness needed for them to reign in eternal peace.
So whenever you are wondering why we, human beings, are in fact such fools, consider us to be the foolers as well as the fools. God has given us the wisdome to become wise again, and if you believe we will be always fooling ourselves, you are in fact fooling yourself.
Alchemist, 666, is merely 999 upside down,
no need to complicate things.
I always complicate things Peter :)
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@Raf - are you hanging around? I promise I won’t be nasty to you. I’d like too chat!
to chat even :(
@Raf …”You can’t define God by gender, age or space. He is.”
So, no gender then!
@Raf
Sorry buddy, but I can not be bothered to read that incredibly long post, so I have skimmed it instead, and while I am hoping you are using sarcasm, or at the very least expressing the bible’s view and not your own, I am leaning towards thinking that you are actually encouraging the belief that god is the be all/end all of existence. So my response is this;
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You mention satan as the cause and embodiment of evil. I don’t believe in satan, except as an idea to personify evil. This personification is applied by many religious fanatics to all acts commited that do not align with your own world view. You people use Satan as a means of dehumanizing those who do not accept your god or your religion, which makes it easier for you to commit atrocities against those people. god also is merely an idea, in my opinion, and while religion may in some cases make good people better, it does not, in fact, make bad people good. I think religion sometimes can actually make bad people worse, by granting them “divine reasoning” to justify their evil.
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Forgive spelling and grammar in this post… please… and also I am not really into reasoning with someone who is so clearly off his rocker.
Hmmm - Raf’s writing style is familiar :( will keep out of this one!
@Raf ; ” and then He sat for three days in the outmost bottom of the world of the death, being tormented by the devil. After those three days He rose again, having defeated the devil, risen from the dead”
Riiiiiiiight - erm, say what? Anyone else having funny pictures of Jesus at the bottom of a well looking pissed off?
And, if he defeated the devil how come us sinners are still being fooled by him?
Actually, my dear Raf, you have been fooled by lots of other fools themselves deluded by myths invented to ease the fear of dying and the grief of losing loved ones, and used by tribal leaders to subjugate the masses. Unlucky.
Anyway Pasta is the much tastier option.
@Alchemist
No fair!! All of you guys/gals who have been here for longer always know who these posters are, and I feel left out. =( Who is his writing style reminiscent of? PLEASE spill the beans… (or the parmesan, if you like…)
@Booty
HA HA HA HA HA… I wasn’t picturing it in that way, but now I am…
Not on an open site Batman and I’m often wrong :)
you’re very welcome to drop me a line on
baccahnaliandelight@yahoo.co.uk
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I’d tell you what I thought, but then I’d have to kill you :)
@ Batman - I have given up wondering who is pretending to be who now, I just let them get on with it - and I think you will find some of the older lot have a bit of a “conspiracy theory” thing going on ;) I try not to take it to seriously. But it is funny to read along.
@Alchemist
Do you really teach Sunday school? My mom’s side of the family is mennonite, and I know some of my aunts are going to Sunday school, which I always thought was for children. What exactly does Sunday school teach? Or is Sunday School a euphemism for drinking in the sports pubs? (not meaning that in a disrespectful way at all, just wondering)
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@Booty
OK, I will keep that in mind. What conspiracy theory though?