idiots claiming a flying spaghetti monster

wow, this site has to be full of the biggest crackheads i have ever heard of.  Idiots claiming a flying spaghetti monster, and more idiots complaining about it,  goddamn.  let me lay things straight here
1. Spaghetti is a food, i’ll eat your false deity, so screw it, you all can go die
2. The concerned christians who post on this site are just as dumb.  who the fuck cares about this little site?  you’re only bringing attention to it by posting.  and for the record, fuck it i’ll eat you’re deity as well.  I hate every last one of you.  and i don’t care if i’m feuling your quest for a lower IQ, ffs, you’re all just a bunch of nerds who decided that it might be funny to listen to the crackhead named Bobby Henderson.
anyways, have fun losers, i’m gonna go to my girlfriends house now.  i’ll explain what a girlfriend is to you later.

sincerely,

nonsectarian

293 Responses to “idiots claiming a flying spaghetti monster”
  1. 1 - Beastly Rich - Jan 27th, 2007

    “you’re only bringing attention to it by posting.” HAHAHA!
    .
    Say hi to your ‘girlfriend’ from me.

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  2. 2 - Rodger the cabin boy - Jan 27th, 2007

    @nonsectarian
    “and i don’t care if i’m feuling your quest for a lower IQ”
    I don’t think we could find anyone with an IQ much lower than yours.BTW have you ever heard of satire.

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  3. 3 - eye witness - Jan 27th, 2007

    “who the fuck cares about this little site? you’re only bringing attention to it by posting.”

    Ironic much?

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  4. 4 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 27th, 2007

    @nonsectarian
    This is an interesting novelty. Most fundies sofar seems to be same-sex oriented, given how much they talk about fuckin’ arseholes. While another recent fundie also had a girlfriend, she was a lesbian too. So tell us about your girlfriend then, nonsectarian. How did you get her to be with you, impressing her with your great intellect and vocabulary?

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  5. 5 - Sacreligous Sea-Dog - Jan 27th, 2007

    Why do people always threaten to eat our peaceful FSM?

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  6. 6 - Rodger the cabin boy - Jan 27th, 2007

    @Sacreligous Sea-Dog
    Because he tastes so good.

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  7. 7 - Some random person - Jan 27th, 2007

    1. Learn to spell
    2. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satire
    3. Since when is science sectarian?

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  8. 8 - St John the Blasphemist - Jan 27th, 2007

    For the millionth time, stop exaggerating. You are sooo opinionated. That post was so hypocritical, I’m not even going to respond to it.
    .
    Oops! I just did.
    .
    St John the Blasphemist
    Saint of Hypocrisy

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  9. 9 - Avatar of Reason - Jan 27th, 2007

    We don’t use crack; we use alcohol. You clearly don’t understand us very well.
    -Avatar of Reason

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  10. 10 - Marc McOar - Jan 27th, 2007

    I love it that they feel the need to include some sort of heterosexual affirming statement, like *said in deep masculine voice* “i’ll explain what a girlfriend is to you later.”
    Note to nonsectarian: You voice will be even deeper when you hit puberty.

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  11. 11 - Avatar of Reason - Jan 27th, 2007

    It is necessary for them to defend their heterosexuality. After all, if they didn’t, we might get the wrong idea (what with their tendency to threaten to shove oars in the asses of other men).

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  12. 12 - Jean Bart - Jan 27th, 2007

    @Avatar of Reason “We don’t use crack; we use alcohol. You clearly don’t understand us very well.”

    Maybe the “nonsectarian” referred to the noise our heads use to make each time we bang them against the wall in despair about the dumbness of our hatemailers.

    RAmen to you Pirates!

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  13. 13 - Huw Edwards-Westlake - Jan 27th, 2007

    Amen to the wisdom of the non-sectarian, he dignifies our cause with his criticism. We weep for his poor girlfriend, how hard it must be to marry beneath oneself.

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  14. 14 - Ted Haggard - Jan 27th, 2007

    now, let’s not dismiss crack so readily. it has it’s place, along with glue sniffing, self immolation and other practices. when i purchase meth from my gay male prostitute friends, i always make sure and have a supply of crack handy for that little extra boost. and when i’m preaching the gospel to millions of gay haters, i make sure to tell them that all drugs are evil and that they are probably going to hell if they don’t send me little susie’s college fund. don’t you see? without crack i might not be so awesome.

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  15. 15 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 27th, 2007

    Hi Ted,
    Did you like the letter some of us signed?

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  16. 16 - Iron gill Kidd - Jan 27th, 2007

    “fuck it i’ll eat you’re deity as well.”……you’ll eat Jesus? ….The FSM I can see, because he tastes so darn good, but….eating Jesus simply CAN’T be healthy for you.

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  17. 17 - Dread Wench L’TUAE - Jan 27th, 2007

    After all, he is a zombie. Can you saw Ewww…..

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  18. 18 - Jingles - Jan 27th, 2007

    Hey Ted… you should sign the letter!
    Wouldn’t that just screw with your old churche’s mind?
    .
    http://www.letter2ted.org

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  19. 19 - Xander168 - Jan 27th, 2007

    hello

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  20. 20 - Alchemist - Jan 27th, 2007

    Hello Xander168. Don’t be shy.

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  21. 21 - Jingles - Jan 27th, 2007

    Hello to you too. Be a gentleman, sign the letter!

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  22. 22 - Marc McOar - Jan 27th, 2007

    Mmmmm, Zombie on toast points.

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  23. 23 - ihatemyspace - Jan 27th, 2007

    @iron gill kidd
    “fuck it i’ll eat you’re deity as well.”……you’ll eat Jesus? ….The FSM I can see, because he tastes so darn good, but….eating Jesus simply CAN’T be healthy for you.

    I thought they DID eat Jesus. “This is the body of the lord, eat it?”

    But now I make an excellent point: legitimate religions ALWAYS steal something from other religions, just before becoming the dominant religion. We eat our deity too!

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  24. 24 - Tina B. - Jan 27th, 2007

    @Nonsectarion
    I really don’t see how someone can hate someone they have never met.I don’t hate anyone,and I hope I never do.You obviously don’t get the point of this site,as always with some people.(blind faith)

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  25. 25 - Peter Popoff - Jan 27th, 2007

    Yes hello Xander168, are you left speechless, for some reason?

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  26. 26 - Alchemist - Jan 27th, 2007

    Hi Peter, I’m just checking-out. How goes it?

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  27. 27 - Peter Popoff - Jan 27th, 2007

    Hi Alchemist, I’m just dropping in. Had a really busy week. Bad weather to boot, I’ll drop a line ASAP. I’m just surfing at the momet.

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  28. 28 - Alchemist - Jan 27th, 2007

    No problems. Take care Peter. I’m going to try to hit the hey now. Catch you later!
    In booze we trust!

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  29. 29 - Peter Popoff - Jan 27th, 2007

    G’nite Alchemist.

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  30. 30 - Wench Beth - Jan 27th, 2007

    To Nonsectarian… this is a family site. Please curb your offensive language and for HEAVEN’S SAKE (Heaven being the location of the beer volcano and stripper factory) go back to school and learn to SPELL!!! I am getting sick and tired of you F-grade students pretending that you can post the English language on this site.

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  31. 31 - Shtil’ - Jan 27th, 2007

    “who the fuck cares about this little site? you’re only bringing attention to it by posting.”

    apparently, you care enough to bring even MORE attention to it. as for your girlfriend, if by “girlfriend” you don’t mean “my own hand,” then i feel sorry for the girl since she obviously isn’t bright enough to do better than you.

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  32. 32 - Nick, Pasta in his Soul Man - Jan 27th, 2007

    @nonsectarian
    Well, then. It seems that the nonbeliever is… retarded. Now, don’t get me wrong. Most people that are, physically OR mentally retarded are perfectly okay. It’s when you’re not smart enough to understand the most basic of ideas, like how to not polute the gene pool with your own DNA, that it bothers me. That, of course, leads me to what our nonbelieveing friend, nonsectarian, is, wich is socially retarded. This is truly sad. However, I’m quite certain that, one day, if he works at it, and with the help of his friends and loved ones, (read: Booze and Drugs), that he, too, will see the holy light of our Delicious Diety, and will perhaps join our cause. This, sadly, is unlikely, and His Holiest Noodley Appendage shall slurp him to the very bowles of hell. You know, the one with no hooker factory, and no beer fountain, and, of course, no pasta. Yes, it will be a sad day, but that day will come for him. But, perhaps, one day, we can finally live in peace from people that would persecute us, and we would live as one with the great FSM.

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  33. 33 - Wench Beth - Jan 27th, 2007

    To Nick, Pasta in his Soul Man… whoa, what else can you say to that grand speech but RAMEN!!!!!!! (And, yes, I did mean to capitalize all the letters :)

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  34. 34 - Nick, Pasta in his Soul Man - Jan 27th, 2007

    Thank you, Wench Beth. May His Noodely Appendage be with you at all times, and may it guide you forever, until you reach the land of Pirates, Midgets, Beer, Hookers, and all other good things.

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  35. 35 - LSM - Jan 27th, 2007

    Before you go to your girfriend’s. how about a bit of research to impress her first (before you show here your little unimpressive weener).

    Look up the definitions of “parody” and “sarcasm”.

    And you will be rewarded with pasta sauces made by 17 virgins.

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  36. 36 - Peter Popoff - Jan 27th, 2007

    nonsectarian. Interesting post. By the way, is your girlfriend a sister of The Laughing Mans girlfriend? You two seem to have the same line of thought.
    Just wondering?

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  37. 37 - Wench Beth - Jan 27th, 2007

    To LSM… ROTF, LOL!!!!!

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  38. 38 - Captain Crack Bag - Jan 27th, 2007

    Okay, if you belive that the people who complain about the FSM are idiotic, then prove me wrong that your NOT complaining about the FSM. Also, just because you have a girlfriend dosent mean you have mastered life and now have the ability to eat spaghetti and waste your time complaining about the FSM. Come to think of it, how would your girlfirend feel if she knew you were on your Soap Box yelling at a bunch of Pirates about a Flying Spaghetti Monster?

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  39. 39 - Magoo Tora - Jan 27th, 2007

    See… this why I’m no longer a Christain.

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  40. 40 - Iron gill Kidd - Jan 27th, 2007

    ihatemyspace– Oh yeah, forgot about that. I still say it’s icky.

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  41. 41 - Wench Beth - Jan 27th, 2007

    Nonsectarian does not have a girlfriend. Prove me wrong, you Blue Meanie!

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  42. 42 - Avatar of Reason - Jan 28th, 2007

    Nonsectarian wrote: “anyways, have fun losers”
    He left out a comma after the word fun. Fun is an adjective rather than a noun in his sentence, and it modifies losers. Instead of telling losers (by which he probably meant us) to have fun, he told us to have many a loser, each of which is fun. He is clearly oblivious. Nonsectarian, just so you know, we already have a losers on this website, and dealing with them is always fun. We call them “fundies.” Alternatively we call them by their name: Nonsectarian.
    -Avatar of Reason

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  43. 43 - Alice Wonder - Jan 28th, 2007

    Well, well, well. Greetings pastafarians. May I join you? *sits at the FSMism table*

    Satire is not only entertaining, but in this case, it’s also rather tasty. Much better than the little bread they distribute as the zombi prophet’s body.

    If you all don’t mind, I think I’ll stick around for a while.

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  44. 44 - Captain Mad John Kidd - Jan 28th, 2007

    Ahoy, Alice! Welcome aboard! We’re always in need of new Wenches! I see you’ve helped yourself to the buffet next to the keg of grog. Pirates cannot live by garlic bread alone. We are a peace-loving lot, but we will defend ourselves mercilessly when attacked by funda mental ists and IDiots.

    May you be forever touched by His Nooldy Appendage.

    RAmen

    MJK

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  45. 45 - Wench Beth - Jan 28th, 2007

    Welcome, Alice!! It’s great to have another wench in our midst :) Please stick around for as long as you like!

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  46. 46 - Booty - Jan 28th, 2007

    Hi Alice!
    Welcome aboard!

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  47. 47 - Jingles - Jan 28th, 2007

    @ Alice
    Yarrrr… it be good to have another wench board our motley crew! Welcome! Grab some grog! Another sentance ended with an exclamation mark!
    .
    @MJK
    “We are a peace-loving lot”
    Except when we’re a-plunderin’. Arrrrr!

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  48. 48 - Alice Wonder - Jan 28th, 2007

    Avast, me hearties! What a welcoming bunch!
    I was hoping to be touched… by His Noodly Appendage, that is. Nooldy is all I’ve got. Well, a girl can dream.

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  49. 49 - Captain Mad John Kidd - Jan 28th, 2007

    @ Jingles

    I was referring to the Gospel that we have the lowest death rate do to hate of any religion, but you are quite right, me heartie, when in doubt, plunder. Arrrgh!!!

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  50. 50 - Jingles - Jan 28th, 2007

    Oh… death rate… yeah. Only one thing has died in the name of FSM…
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    … our morals.

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  51. 51 - Captain Mad John Kidd - Jan 28th, 2007

    Spot on, shipmate.

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  52. 52 - Nava Spider - Jan 28th, 2007

    Ahoy all,
    i suspect i know why Nonsectarian intends not to bring attention to our gathering here. he fears for his tenuous hold on his girlfriend, should she find out about us then she’ll become a wench for sure! which fine woman wouldn’t? think about it, you can wear what you like, carry a sword, drink grog and find yourself a pirate (or like minded wench) in comparison to small minded nutters….

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  53. 53 - Homo narrans - Jan 28th, 2007

    are you feeling any insecurities there, nonsectarian? given that you seem compelled to draw further attention to something you seem to believe is beneath your notice…
    .
    don’t worry, if you still wet the bed at age 15 we pastafarians won’t reject you. does the pirtae ship have an absorbant hammock, just for poor cases like nonsectarian? since he feels the need to lash out at us in such a fashion, one can only believe that he’s trying to compensate for something.

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  54. 54 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    @Alice Wonder
    Welcome. We are a very international pirate gang. A large UK contingent, which is logical given Brittains extensive maritime history. It has spilled over into its former colonies, like the US and Australia. And by now most of the world has become enlightened. In fact, only last week did a South African poster ‘2 minute noodle’ announce him/herself, looking to rid SA from the great heat by converting more pirates in his country. Care to let us know where you’re from?

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  55. 55 - Dylf - Jan 28th, 2007

    Dear all

    I don’t like when people claim a persons IQ is low because he has a different way of believing. If you mean that this religion not suites your visions, then you should go to hell, or what you ever call it in your religion. This religion is might actually be better documented than Christianity or Islam.
    I don’t believe in a religion that is based on stories that has passed from mouth to mouth in 2-400 years before it’s actually is written down. I can make up stories, so could our ancestors.
    I believe that a person that can se beyond his own faith and argument for the better and the worse, is a person with a very high IQ. BUT, a person who only carp and nag is a person that isn’t interested in gathering knowledge, therefore his IQ must be so much smaller.

    Tag den fedtøre! (shit it is on Danish!)

    \Dylf

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  56. 56 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Jan 28th, 2007

    Nava Spider:

    which fine woman wouldn’t? … find yourself a pirate (or like minded wench)

    Or both (a pirate and another wench). Both is allowed. If fact I think our church is so liberal the it may even be slightly encouraged.

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  57. 57 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    Welcome Dylf (sorry if you had been around longer I and hadn’t spotted you)
    Another nationality. Wouldn’t it be nice to see how far we’ve spread? Why don’t we compile a small list. We’ve all seen posts from
    Great Brittain (certainly England and N. Ireland, I seem to remember Wales too).
    There was a poster called Irish. Are you from the republic?
    Australia of course!
    A number from the US
    Netherlands
    South Africa
    It appears now also from Denmark.
    I seem to remeber Sweden.
    .
    Please copy-paste and add your country if you like.

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  58. 58 - daqq - Jan 28th, 2007

    @nonsectarian: Well, which religion has more evidence, more documentation, more anything than pastafarianism?

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  59. 59 - Jingles - Jan 28th, 2007

    Oh, don’t forget Beast from tha east (russia)
    James (that christian guy from germany)
    That Polish girl… washername…
    Some posts from Iraq (though I suppose they’re just poms and yanks that are fighting over there)
    A couple of Brazilians ( :D )
    Some Argentinians
    Mexicans
    Canadians
    French
    Spanish (or was it Portuguese?)
    And I think a chinese girl

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  60. 60 - Alchemist - Jan 28th, 2007

    Hmm. Just had a good read of nonsectarian’s post.
    Poor spelling, calling us nerds and losers. A blatant mention that he has a girlfriend and oh so subtle hint that we haven’t.
    All wrapped up in a warm “I’m much more clever than you” tone.
    .
    Is TheLaughingMan back? Hey Daffodil, how is Rosy Red Palm? Doing much swimming or are the pool lights still broken?

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  61. 61 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    Thanks Jingles
    So we have Pastafarians either liviong in or born in
    Brittain
    Australia
    USA
    Netherlands
    South Africa
    Russia
    Germany
    Brazil
    Argentinia
    Mexico
    Canada
    France
    Spain
    China
    Ireland
    Denmark
    Sweden
    Poland
    And I should mention Switserland, as a collegue working at PSI brought my attention to FSM.
    .
    Wow! His noodly embrace has covered so much of the world already. If your country is not here but you are a Pastafarian, or you know of countries that have been omitted, please copy-paste-add them to the list.

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  62. 62 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Jan 28th, 2007

    Hey Alchemist,

    I think you’re right the TLM is back.
    The witless twat.

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  63. 63 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Jan 28th, 2007

    And people say there is no such thing as a global pastafarian conspiracy.
    Which of course there isn’t.

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  64. 64 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    Conspiracy? What Conspiracy? We’re just trying to enlighten people so that they too may feel the warm embrace of his noodly appendages. If you think only of how much good He brings to the world and indeed maybe to countless other alien worlds that he also created in those two magical seconds when he popped the lives of our ancestors into existence. We are blessed. We are truly blessed. Hail to all his noodly appendages! Who could ever claim even for a moment that we are doing things other than from the purest, highest, worthiests motives? Frail creatures though we may be, we are His creatures, doing His work. Only those who are in the service of Satan (rice eaters) and who need to have their eyes opened from their dark, spaghetti-less ways. So that all the world may join in jubilation for his Great Noodlyness.
    Ramen.

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  65. 65 - TheJ - Jan 28th, 2007

    Oh, the ironing!

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  66. 66 - Saluyman - Jan 28th, 2007

    Anyone who sees this as more than an illustration of the insensibility of ID should not be let near a computer. And if they DO see it as more than that then they should respect the views of other people. Creationists are respected after all. It sin’t worth getting excited over.

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  67. 67 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    @Saluyman
    “Creationists are respected after all.”
    Come again?

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  68. 68 - ihatemyspace - Jan 28th, 2007

    @iron gill kidd
    you’re right. that stuff is pretty gross. little chips of rice paper. and some crappy wine. i much prefer our beer volcano.

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  69. 69 - Jean Bart - Jan 28th, 2007

    Don’t forget Flanders, up to now still a part of Belgium. But not for long anymore!

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  70. 70 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    @Jean Bart
    Ok then:
    Belgium
    Brittain
    Australia
    USA
    Netherlands
    South Africa
    Russia
    Germany
    Brazil
    Argentinia
    Mexico
    Canada
    France
    Spain
    China
    Ireland
    Denmark
    Sweden
    Poland
    Switserland

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  71. 71 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    @Vera Fedele Jan 28th, 2007 at 11:39 am (in the FSM ice thread)
    FSM c’è! pure in inverno!
    RAmen (and greetings from Italy).
    .
    Ok, that’s another part of the Medditeranean covered.
    Italy
    Belgium
    Brittain
    Australia
    USA
    Netherlands
    South Africa
    Russia
    Germany
    Brazil
    Argentinia
    Mexico
    Canada
    France
    Spain
    China
    Ireland
    Denmark
    Sweden
    Poland
    Switserland

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  72. 72 - sprightly - Jan 28th, 2007

    @nonsectarian
    “i’ll explain what a girlfriend is to you later.”
    Come on you promissed!
    We’re still waiting for you to tell us here in the BVI.

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  73. 73 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    And going thougg the forum adds New Zealand and Iceland, making it
    Argentinia
    Australia
    Belgium
    Brazil
    Brittain
    Canada
    China
    Denmark
    France
    Germany
    Iceland
    Ireland
    Italy
    Mexico
    Netherlands
    New Zealand
    Poland
    Russia
    South Africa
    Spain
    Sweden
    Switserland
    USA

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  74. 74 - Alchemist - Jan 28th, 2007

    @TheJ. Hahaha! Not the J?

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  75. 75 - Wench Beth - Jan 28th, 2007

    To Saluyman… name ONE creationist who is respected. I dare you.

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  76. 76 - Wench Beth - Jan 28th, 2007

    Regarding IQ, there has been a major study done to determine the IQ’s of Pastafarians versus those of the general population versus those of Bible-thumpers. The average Pastafarian IQ was 132. The general population was 99-100. The Bible-thumpers were 67.
    .
    I rest my case.

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  77. 77 - Ralf - Jan 28th, 2007

    Guys!

    Freedom of Religion!
    Freedom of Speech!

    And keep Religion out of science classes!

    Evolution does not exclude the existence of a God.

    I wish Pastafarianism would not be needed, but it might save some souls from extremism.

    Just my 2 cents.

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  78. 78 - Ralf - Jan 28th, 2007

    Oh,

    add Dubai, United Arab Emirates

    to the list.

    It’s a muslim country that is very tolerant, everyone is free to practise the religion of choice.

    I believe in God. And because I do, I support the FSM movement with all my heart.

    Please keep religion out of the government/schools/universities.

    And to the ID people: If you cannot laugh about yourself, there is something wrong with you. Think about it.

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  79. 79 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    Ralf
    “Oh, add Dubai, United Arab Emirates to the list. It’s a muslim country that is very tolerant, everyone is free to practise the religion of choice. I believe in God. And because I do, I support the FSM movement with all my heart.
    Please keep religion out of the government/schools/universities.”
    .
    Thanks Ralf. Your Middle East entry makes it
    Argentinia
    Australia
    Belgium
    Brazil
    Brittain
    Canada
    China
    Denmark
    France
    Germany
    Iceland
    Ireland
    Italy
    Mexico
    Netherlands
    New Zealand
    Poland
    Russia
    South Africa
    Spain
    Sweden
    Switserland
    USA
    United Arab Emirates

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  80. 80 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Jan 28th, 2007

    Creationists are respected after all.
    I agree that they are respected. But not by me.
    Just so that we’ve got that clear.

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  81. 81 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Jan 28th, 2007

    DPG, We spell it “Britain” (one t). Perhaps we drank the other one.
    We like tea.

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  82. 82 - Marce - Jan 28th, 2007

    I pray God to forgive you all, you think you’re very intelligent laughing of religion and God, just remember Einstein believed in God.

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  83. 83 - Beastly Rich - Jan 28th, 2007

    creationists are respected by other creationists.

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  84. 84 - Beastly Rich - Jan 28th, 2007

    Einstein never believed in your god he was a deist(sp).

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  85. 85 - Peter Popoff - Jan 28th, 2007

    Thanks Marce.
    Are you going to hell?
    Or are you perfect? Got Milk?

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  86. 86 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    @Beastly Rich
    You are right to correct Marce there. In an interview he once stated that what he had meant when he said ‘god’ was the beautiful ordering that is observeable in the laws of physics that govern the universe. Physics may have head a spiritual dimension for him. As for what religious people often like to hold up (’Einstein believed in God, do you think you’re smarter than he was?’), they should read the interview in which he said
    .
    “It was, of course, a lie what you read about my religious convictions, a lie which is being systematically repeated. I do not believe in a personal God and I have never denied this but have expressed it clearly.”

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  87. 87 - Dread Wench L’TUAE - Jan 28th, 2007

    “I pray God to forgive you all, you think you’re very intelligent laughing of religion and God, just remember Einstein believed in God.”
    Erm… I’m not sure he believed in YOUR god, thought he may have believed in some sort of supernatual force. And, why does god need to forgive me? I wasn’t aware I did anything illegal? Unless they found out about that one thing with the Volvo…….
    Forget that. I admit nothing. ^_^

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  88. 88 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Jan 28th, 2007

    I think it’s hilarious.
    They can only find one bright person from the whole 20th century who believed in God and he didn’t.

    HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa!

    RAmen.

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  89. 89 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    It is hilarious. On the other hand, it’s also worrying. Such people have the right to drive a car. Buy a gun. Vote. Stand for office. And (AAAAAAARGHHH!!) they manage to get themselves into high office. Bugger.

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  90. 90 - cuttlefish rule - Jan 28th, 2007

    To nonsectarian (even though you probably don’t give a shit)-
    Just one comment: I don’t consider myself a crackhead because I converted from worshipping a cuttlefish to the much more enlightened ways of worshipping a flying spaghetti monster. What about “This is a parody” do you not understand? If I were to consider myself a crackhead, it would because I did crack.

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  91. 91 - Pasta Riot - Jan 28th, 2007

    I’d rather be an “idiot” (based on your definition), than someone who can’t take a damn good joke with a damn good message.

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  92. 92 - Pixel Pete - Jan 28th, 2007

    @Marce
    Einstein did believe in God, but last I checked Einstein couldn’t even tie his own shoes. He might have come up with a bunch of fun theories and an atom bomb, but he’s not as smart as they’d lead you to believe. Stephen Hawking is a smart guy, a cripple albeit but still a smart guy.
    RAmen

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  93. 93 - Marc McOar - Jan 28th, 2007

    Also, Marce, Einstein is dead. Dead, dead, dead. Dead. So, he cannot confirm or refute your charge. Are there any smart guys that are still alive that you would like to mention?

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  94. 94 - hey man, its like….noodly… - Jan 28th, 2007

    by saying that you will eat jesus, that is just saying that you are at least a little bit christian in that christians drink the ‘lords blood’ (wine), so, you are in fact all but the name in which you made for yourself (nonsectarian), thus making all of the other statements assumably false as well.

    RAmen

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  95. 95 - God? Pasta? what has more letters? - Jan 28th, 2007

    well technically eating spaghetti is not bad… Christians eat wine and bread and they think that it is Jesus…. in our case it’s the same thing

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  96. 96 - Iron gill Kidd - Jan 28th, 2007

    “just remember Einstein believed in God.” Not your god. AS mentioned, I’m pretty sure he was a deist. And so what if he did believe in your god? Why should that affect our lives one ounce?
    -
    The fundies are back, I could weep with joy.

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  97. 97 - Greenbeard - Jan 28th, 2007

    The other thing about the “Famous Scientist x believed in my God” argument is that scientist x is either Einstein (who didn’t) or has been dead for hundreds of years.

    I don’t think I’m smarter than scientist x- it’s just that there’s a lot more evidence around against religion now than there was when scientist x was alive.

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  98. 98 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 28th, 2007

    Just to preempt the fundies about IDiot scientists: the Discovery comic duo (Behe and Dembski) haven’t produced anything that could withstand peer review.

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  99. 99 - Jon - Jan 28th, 2007

    Oh you mean the Behehehehe and Dumbski clown duo?

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  100. 100 - Greenbeard - Jan 28th, 2007

    Forget peer review- Behe and Dembski haven’t produced anything that could withstand an inquisitive six year old.

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  101. 101 - Jose - Jan 28th, 2007

    Hey, just looking at the list of countries, and… I’m from Guatemala, in Alaska as an exchange student at the moment. So add that one on!
    -
    Is it okay if I eat your god? He sounds delicious xD

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  102. 102 - Captain Mad John Kidd - Jan 28th, 2007

    Welcome aboard, Jose! I’ve spent some time in Coban, also down on the South Coast and along the border with Belize. Mayan archaeology.

    And yes, may the warmth of His Noodly Goodnes forever touch your soul. Pirates cannot live by garlic bread alone. be sure to wash it down with some grog, as well.

    RAmen

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  103. 103 - SaucyWench - Jan 28th, 2007

    Ahhhhh….. I think TLM has returned. Just when I thought I’d finished all the ironing….

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  104. 104 - Jon - Jan 28th, 2007

    @Greenbeard Jan 28th, 2007 at 5:26 pm
    “Forget peer review- Behe and Dembski haven’t produced anything that could withstand an inquisitive six year old.
    .
    True Greenbeard, very true.
    RAmen
    .
    @Jose Jan 28th, 2007 at 5:40 pm
    “Is it okay if I eat your god? He sounds delicious xD”
    Hey there Alaskan Jose. Of course it’s OK to eat spaghettie, as this is considered as taking sacrament. You can’t actually eat the FSM, as He is omnipresent and omniscient. However, partaking of food made in his image is one of the finest forms of worship. (along with drinking beer)
    RAmen

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  105. 105 - Captain Mad John Kidd - Jan 28th, 2007

    @ Saucy Wench

    UnLaughingBoy is so full of himself I think that he would post as himself. This is just a like-minded wannabe who can’t be bothered with a reply to over one hundred posts.

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  106. 106 - Wench Beth - Jan 28th, 2007

    Einstein is not dead, by the way. He’s quite alive and I was just over at his house for a little get-together with Jim Morrison, Elvis Presley, John Entwistle and Keith Moon as well. Einstein told me (and I quote), “I’ve been a Pastafarian for longer than you’ve been alive; as a matter of fact, the Holy FSM revealed the theory of relativity to me and gave me full permission to call it my own.”
    .
    So THAT should settle some arguments!!

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  107. 107 - Captain Mad John Kidd - Jan 28th, 2007

    Well done, Wench Beth. With a band like that it must have been one hell(Grand Cayman) of a party. BTW, did Einstein happen to clear up that string theory controversy?

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  108. 108 - Brother Rigatoni - Jan 28th, 2007

    Now that I escaped the additivness of World of Warcraft, I’ve returned to my fellow pastafarians! First off, a belated welcome to Alice. Secondly, I’d like to thank nonsectarian for his amusing anecdotes of insecurity and language slaughtering. You’ve filled my heart with much noodly faith.
    .
    I have sampled much in the ways of pasta since my last post, and I return with many tales of booty plundering!
    May we all travel to the great spaghetti in the sky.
    RAmen
    ~Brother Rigatoni

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  109. 109 - Wench Beth - Jan 28th, 2007

    Actually, Captain, I asked Einstein about that and he said that string theory is such holy research that it can only be discussed with His Noodliness himself. I kind of understand why, I mean, spaghetti is the BASIS of string theory. The question I have is, how many strands of spaghetti *are* there??

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  110. 110 - Captain Mad John Kidd - Jan 28th, 2007

    Good question, Beth. His Noodliness does work in mysterious ways. I suppose the simple answer would be: as many as it takes. But then I would not presume to speak for Him. Maybe we will never know.

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  111. 111 - Captain Mad John Kidd - Jan 28th, 2007

    Welcome back, Brother Rigatoni. We have surely missed your words of wisdom and look forward to your noodley tales.

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  112. 112 - mike - Jan 28th, 2007

    why are you so angry man? just chill and be peaceful. there is no need to be so mean, if you dont like it, dont read it. forget about it. dont get all upset. dont tell people to die. thats just a terrible thing to say bro. just be happy and cheer yourself up with some 420 magic. maybe then you wont be so angry.

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  113. 113 - Johnny Corvette - Jan 28th, 2007

    @Ralf

    Even Jews?

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  114. 114 - The atheist revolutionary - Jan 28th, 2007

    Blasphamy!!
    Shame that some people are out for attention by dirty means like this

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  115. 115 - Jingles - Jan 29th, 2007

    And Jose adds Guatemala, to make it
    .
    Argentinia
    Australia
    Belgium
    Brazil
    Britain
    Canada
    China
    Denmark
    France
    Germany
    Guatemala
    Iceland
    Ireland
    Italy
    Mexico
    Netherlands
    New Zealand
    Poland
    Russia
    South Africa
    Spain
    Sweden
    Switserland
    USA
    United Arab Emirates
    .
    25 countries! Woohoo!

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  116. 116 - eye witness - Jan 29th, 2007

    George W. Bush and two friends–a Rabbi, and a Hindu holy man–had car trouble in the countryside and asked to spend the night with a farmer.
    The farmer said, “There might be a problem. You see, I only have room for two to sleep in the house. So one of you must sleep in the barn.”
    “No problem,” chimed the Rabbi. “My people wandered in the desert for forty years. I am humble enough to sleep in the barn for one evening.” With that he departed to the barn, and the others bedded down for the night.
    Moments later a knock was heard at the door; the farmer opened the door. There stood the Rabbi from the barn. “What’s wrong?” asked the farmer. He replied, “I am grateful to you, but I just can’t sleep in the barn. There is a pig in the barn, and my faith believes that is an unclean animal.”
    His Hindu friend agrees to swap places with him. But a few minutes later the same scene reoccurs. There is a knock on the door. “What’s wrong?” the farmer asks. The Hindu holy man replies, “I, too, am grateful for your helping us out, but there is a cow in the barn. In my country cows are considered sacred and I can’t sleep on holy ground!”
    That left only Dubya to make the change. He grumbled and complained, but went out to the barn. Moments later there was another knock on the farmer’s door. Frustrated and tired, the farmer opens the door, and there stood the pig and the cow.

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  117. 117 - Red DutchPasta Kidd - Jan 29th, 2007

    hahahahahaha, funny!

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  118. 118 - Beastly Rich - Jan 29th, 2007

    thats a good one!

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  119. 119 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 29th, 2007

    @Johnny Corvette
    After absorbing a well-deserved dose of sarcasm and criticism from you and others, there is still the open matter of reaction kinetics of infrequent reactions (from the long flock of dodos thread). Now that various people have reminded me to be a less pompous arse, do you have any serious thoughts on the matter? Do you still maintain that a series of chemical reactions that occur extremely rarely are the sign of a devine hand? If so, could you elaborate a little why that is? Specifically, could you point out where in my jumps analogy you think I am wrong please? If not, then some part that you very strongly believed in must have changed I presum. Is that the case, and if so, does it have any wider implications for your world view?

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  120. 120 - Johnny Corvette - Jan 29th, 2007

    @DPG
    I would expect that someone could use your argument against you. They could say that the level of activation energy required to foment life could only be the hand of God and is a one time deal. Ie the bar being so high only a divine pole vaulter can get over. My understanding (somewhat loosely connected to my worldview) has indeed been that original life based on two chemicals reacting to an activation energy event is the ONLY inferred theory that precludes the existence of the divine. But as you correctly state it is more my lack of certain knowledge that steers my views. My intelligence penalty points buy me time at the local library and book store.

    As far as you being a pompous arse I think it is in your Dutch heritage (wink). All that hagelslag you know.

    @The Atheist Revolutionary
    “Blasphemy!!
    Shame that some people are out for attention by dirty means like this “ – Was that directed to me regarding my comment about freedom of religion for Jews in the UAE? I was asking a valid question. In several mid east countries the Jewish religion is banned by the state. I believe the UAE as well but I am not sure.

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  121. 121 - Gomer - Jan 29th, 2007

    I read a book when i was a child called Grandma And The Pirates. it is a story about a Grandma who makes delicious noodles. the smell of pasta attacts pirates, and they take the pasta and the grandma to make her make more.
    .
    Surly there is not a single children’s book as holy as this one, for it contains bothe Pirates and Pasta, and Pirates eating Pasta. here is a link that mentions the book.
    http://www.phoebegilman.com/grandma.html

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  122. 122 - Homo narrans - Jan 29th, 2007

    i can only imagine Jews in UAE countries would be on the receiving end of an anrgy mob in very short order.

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  123. 123 - Iron gill Kidd - Jan 29th, 2007

    Hm….yes, don’t think they’d be too welcome there. Might explain why there’s all of five of them in the UAE.

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  124. 124 - Saide - Jan 29th, 2007

    hi guys

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  125. 125 - Alchemist - Jan 29th, 2007

    Hi Saide. You’re most welcome to join in the fun. I’m one of the quiet ones here and tend to keep myself to myself so don’t worry if you’re shy.
    Hope to see you soon.

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  126. 126 - Teddy - Jan 29th, 2007

    Just wondering, given this guy’s genes are better out of the pool…
    If he were to say this to either one of us or a xian, and we removed his genes from the pool, would he count for a Darwin Award?
    I mean, HE is the one asking for it. He is THAT dumb to come here with those comments.
    .
    Girlfriend? MMmmm, no offence to the ladies, but aren’t one of those things that steal all your money, stop you going out and force you to living life the exact way they tell you to?

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  127. 127 - Rev. Spaminator - Jan 29th, 2007

    You’ll eat the christian diety? I heard Jesus had more of a foot fetish. After the resurection (more like reanimation) he just wanders around looking for the flesh of the living. That is the whole confusion about the Transubstantiation. See the ramblings of St. Ash Williams to get a better idea of how it all comes together.

    BTW, I’d eat the FSM’s meat balls any day!

    RAmen!

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  128. 128 - Peter Popoff - Jan 29th, 2007

    “i’m gonna go to my girlfriends house now. i’ll explain what a girlfriend is to you later.”

    .
    nonsectarian, It’s later please do explian.
    But I don’t want to hear about Rosie Redpalms, or her sister Stacy Fourfingers.

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  129. 129 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Jan 29th, 2007

    @Wench Beth Jan 28th, 2007 at 7:26 pm
    If you saw Elvis place did you ask him if he’d seen Osama Bin Laden?
    When I was round Einsteins he explained to me that the Flying Spaghetti Monsters Noodly Appendages undulating across the vast expanses of space where his primary inspiration for gravitational waves.

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  130. 130 - Wench Beth - Jan 29th, 2007

    To Captain N.S…. no, sorry, I didn’t ask about our pal Osama, but I’m sure His Holiness has Osama trussed up in noodles somewhere.
    .
    Wow, it’s amazing how all of our highly researched, well thought-out theories of physics are simply the work of the FSM. He is truly great. I had some killer pasta last night in His honor. Yum!

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  131. 131 - CerebrumDurum - Jan 29th, 2007

    @DutchPastaGuy, @Jingles

    Nice list of different countries. However, I noticed that Switzerland is spelled wrongly (just a little bit). I just wanted to make sure that the FSM, after typing the name into google earth, finds the location correctly to bless us with his benevolent appendages.

    P.S. I didn’t want to imply that the Delicious One is dependend on IT technology, but considering the small size of the country (and the unpredictable eruptions of the beer volcano), I wanted to be on the safe side.

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  132. 132 - Claprán - Jan 29th, 2007

    Bigger than Ireland

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  133. 133 - Teddy - Jan 29th, 2007

    MY BAD!
    Sorry lasses, I made a very wrong comment about girlfriends earlier.
    .
    I meant vicars and priests. It’s so easy to confuse, given all the other similarities.

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  134. 134 - Dread Wench L’TUAE - Jan 29th, 2007

    @Wench Beth- Of course! All scientific theories are influenced by his noodly appendage, just like everything else.^_^ With all the evidence out there, I can’t understand how anyone has doubt.

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  135. 135 - DarkSapiens - Jan 29th, 2007

    Hi you all! Here’s another guy from Spain.

    It’s sad to see there are a lot of people like nonsectarian who can’t just think about what they’re saying. He contradicts himself a lot of times.

    That’s why I like pastafarianism. It encourages people to think by themselves.

    Oh, and Argentina is wrong spelled in the list, too…

    Take care ;)

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  136. 136 - EarthRise - Jan 29th, 2007

    Damn, his scathing mention of his left hand as “girlfriend” has caused me to become introspective and insecure. Might as well turn to another false idol and regain my sense of cosmic placement through self-delusion, because, ya know, he obviously just ate my previous idol.

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  137. 137 - living_abomination - Jan 29th, 2007

    He ate my deity? That’s cool, I ate his girlfriend. Yummy.

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  138. 138 - Nikki - Jan 29th, 2007

    Okay Im not dissing your guyses religion but how can a food be a god?

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  139. 139 - Jingles - Jan 29th, 2007

    Hey, don’t look at me. I just cut and pasted. I even fixed up the double t that was in Britain.
    .
    But for all you militant copy editors out there (where is Starbuckaneer anyway?)…
    .
    Argentina
    Australia
    Belgium
    Brazil
    Britain
    Canada
    China
    Denmark
    France
    Germany
    Guatemala
    Iceland
    Ireland
    Italy
    Mexico
    Netherlands
    New Zealand
    Poland
    Russia
    South Africa
    Spain
    Sweden
    Switzerland
    United Arab Emirates
    USA

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  140. 140 - Captain Mad John Kidd - Jan 29th, 2007

    @ Nikki

    Humans created spaghetti in the image of the FSM as a tribute to His Noodly Goodness. Friday is our Holy Day in which great quantities of noodles and the sauce of your choice, along with beer (or the beverage of your choice) are consumed in a manner similar to that of communion. With food comes warmth, with warmth comes hope, and with hope all things are possible.

    RAmen

    MJK

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  141. 141 - PlagueChicken - Jan 29th, 2007

    My tears of joy were eclipsed only by prolonged bursts of hilarity. Kindred spirits all, and full of piratey goodness.

    My stance on the bearded fulminator in the sky has been as follows:

    The idea of God sacrificing himself to himself
    in order to prevent himself sending us all to hell
    for committing sins because of the way he made us,
    and which he knew we were going to do anyway,
    is a little hard to swallow

    I was so thoroughly disenchanted by my 11+ years in Baptist (Southern Baptist hellfire & brimstone no less) school that I was on the verge of starting my own religion – but I think yours might be even better than The Church of Reformed Satan.

    We had a wicked tag-line all worked out though: The Church of Reformed Satan – doing good in the name of evil, ’cause god is just not working out….

    Maybe you pirate people should work on some sound bite (ravioli-sized) messages for the great unwashed masses – they of admittedly short attention span – to further the reach of His Noodly Appendage.

    RAmen

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  142. 142 - Jon - Jan 29th, 2007

    @PlagueChicken
    “The idea of God sacrificing himself to himself in order to prevent himself sending us all to hell for committing sins because of the way he made us, and which he knew we were going to do anyway, is a little hard to swallow”
    .
    What a beautiful nutshell.
    Welcome home PlagueChicken :)
    RAmen

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  143. 143 - Avatar of Reason - Jan 30th, 2007

    @Nikki (non-wench)
    (Jokingly) How can a food be a god? Very easily! He’s omnipotent and can be whatever he wants.
    In all seriousness, this webpage is meant to be a satire that reduces intelligent design theory down to an argument that is intended to be ludicrous. The goal is to state that even though a theory is internally consistent, it is not necessarily scientific, and it does not necessarily deserve to be taught it public schools. The argument on behalf of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is intended to mirror the traditional arguments for Intelligent Design theory. Most of us do not worship pasta, although many of us enjoy devouring it in large quantities in as a “sacrament” and typing in pirate voices.
    -Avatar of Reason, or rather, Avatarrrrrrr of Reason

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  144. 144 - t3h BK - Jan 30th, 2007

    Why is this religon, and it’s God for that matter, so awesome? And is the FSM made of pure w1n?

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  145. 145 - oj the pirate - Jan 30th, 2007

    Christian bases:
    1st base: praying together
    2nd base: lighting candles together
    3rd base: holding hands
    home run: crucifying her

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  146. 146 - BobfromEngland - Jan 30th, 2007

    In view of the personal criticisms of us made by the hate mailers I would like to say that I am 54 years old, educated to post-graduate (masters) level, attended 2 universities, work for the emergency services, am straight and have lived with the same wench for over 25 years without getting married as I don’t see why the state or a non existent god should tell me how to live my life. I suspect that these are achievements which will be common to Pastafarians but utterly unachievable by our detractors. So come on hate mailers tell us what wonderful things you have achieved in your lives before you start criticising other peoples’ right to live as they see fit.

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  147. 147 - DarkSapiens - Jan 30th, 2007

    Well said.
    .
    RAmen!

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  148. 148 - Captain G. Fodder - Jan 30th, 2007

    Ahoy there mates, Im new to this whole FSM thing, just checkin it out today, sounds pretty good to me, a hell of a lot more believable then half the crap any mainstream religion is gonna force down my throat. By the by, just out of curiosity, how many fellow Pastafarians are Australian? Also, do i have to get baptised or anything, coz a dip in a swimming pool of pasta sauce is damn tempting

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  149. 149 - Capn’EmilyRose’Skittle - Jan 30th, 2007

    OKAY OKAY.
    I ADMIT IT.
    I have no girlfriend! -sobs-
    No. Wait.
    I forgot. I have four. Silly me.
    And is it just me, or does the hatemail always involve girlfriends? Are all wenches here automatically presumed to be lesbians? I, for one, have a BOYfriend (as well as the aforementioned girlfriends), and he’s a Pastafarian – which renders your point, sir, completely moot.
    .
    Also. You seem to have a lot of hate. Does someone need a big fat Noodly hug? -outstretches arms with a manic grin-
    RAmen.

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  150. 150 - Capn’EmilyRose’Skittle - Jan 30th, 2007

    @ojthepirate
    .
    Hahaha! Nice!
    RAmen.

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  151. 151 - Captain G. Fodder - Jan 30th, 2007

    Oh yeah and PlagueChicken
    “The idea of God sacrificing himself to himself in order to prevent himself sending us all to hell for committing sins because of the way he made us, and which he knew we were going to do anyway, is a little hard to swallow”
    Wow, i mean wow. Kinda makes the whole eternal forgiveness seem a bit less meaningful, especially since he makes us beg.

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  152. 152 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 30th, 2007

    @Johnny Corvette
    “I would expect that someone could use your argument against you. They could say that the level of activation energy required to foment life could only be the hand of God and is a one time deal. Ie the bar being so high only a divine pole vaulter can get over. My understanding (somewhat loosely connected to my worldview) has indeed been that original life based on two chemicals reacting to an activation energy event is the ONLY inferred theory that precludes the existence of the divine. But as you correctly state it is more my lack of certain knowledge that steers my views.”
    .
    Infrequent events are covered by physics without the need for any devine hand. But as you state that it is lack of certain knowledge that keeps us from agreeing on this one, it seems we’ll have to leave the interesting discussion about it for now. Hopefully we will find another topic to debate soon. Or if you are indeed reading up on it, as you state below, then please return to the subject lateron.
    .
    “My intelligence penalty points buy me time at the local library and book store.”
    .
    Why don’t we call them ‘knowledge penalty points’? At some stage I asserted that it was lack of knowledge or understanding that drove your belief in a devine creator. As you don’t seem to lack intelligence, understanding shouldn’t be the problem. It would be interesting to see if reading on the matter will make us agree. I’ll gladly recommend ‘Climbing Mount Improbable’ again (though I haven’t read it myself). Or, if you’re into a bit dryer, non-popular science reading, any book on Amazon that sounds like ‘Introduction to reaction kinetics’ should do.
    .
    “As far as you being a pompous arse I think it is in your Dutch heritage (wink). All that hagelslag you know.”
    .
    Oh yes, that is a convenient way out for me. It’s not me personally. It’s the country I was born in. But then how come Red DutchPasta Kid is so much nicer than me?

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  153. 153 - Linguini Lass - Jan 30th, 2007

    I think nonsectarian’s “girlfriend” is of the blow-up variety.

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  154. 154 - Wench Beth - Jan 30th, 2007

    Nonsectarian has a BOYFRIEND, pirates!! Which I have zero problem with… just why did you have to lie about it, Non? Are you ashamed of being gay? If so, welcome to Pastafarianism which accepts EVERYONE with open arms… I mean, noodles!

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  155. 155 - Alchemist - Jan 30th, 2007

    @DPG “‘Introduction to reaction kinetics’ ”
    .
    Dear FSM nooooooo!
    You’ll be getting into vacuum energy next. I’m going to hide behind the settee :)

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  156. 156 - Lolli Popoff - Jan 30th, 2007

    Nonsectarian, TWO girlfriends!
    Lefty, and rightie!

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  157. 157 - Red DutchPasta Kidd - Jan 30th, 2007

    DPG: It’s not me personally. It’s the country I was born in. But then how come Red DutchPasta Kid is so much nicer than me?
    *
    “Blush” Thank You DPG, that is so kind :).
    *
    *
    Captain EmilyRose: Yeah I noticed as well, I guess it’s because they are guys themselves, and unlike our pirate friends here, they are unable to consider anyone other than themselves. Or in other words: they are dumb, selfish little %$^(*&^.

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  158. 158 - BobDobbs - Jan 30th, 2007

    You folks are forgetting that the principles of slack over-rule this pasta-based deity. The subgenius have already pondered these facts. –Bob

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  159. 159 - Suppish Guy - Jan 30th, 2007

    Dude this spackhead needs a serious chill out, i just visited and this site seems imense. I LOVE RANDOM. It is really quite funny. Any way i would like to point out i dont think that these christian people’s diety is jesus. i think that would be god. you know as in god. the dude that sits up in the sky doing jack all all day

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  160. 160 - Alchemist - Jan 30th, 2007

    Spackhead! Ooops!

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  161. 161 - dantes_torment - Jan 30th, 2007

    The spelling; the grammar! It burns my eyes!! How come the ones who can find all the holes in stupid theories and recognize the foolishness of others are the ones with the low IQ’s. Since when are physics majors “crackheads”? Oh yeah, since Christianity; silly me, the most intelligent and understanding people in the world are full of zombie crap.

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  162. 162 - Jon - Jan 30th, 2007

    @BobDobbs Jan 30th, 2007 at 3:31 pm
    “You folks are forgetting that the principles of slack over-rule this pasta-based deity. The subgenius have already pondered these facts. –Bob”

    The FSM is not slack…just drunk/hungover…alot!

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  163. 163 - Rev. Spaminator - Jan 30th, 2007

    @BobDobbs

    Don’t forget the doctrine of “make your own damn church!” as ranted here and there by Stang.

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  164. 164 - Dread Wench L’TUAE - Jan 30th, 2007

    Do any girl Fundies post here? I’ve only seen guys so far, and I wonder if there’s a difference.

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  165. 165 - Geologist - Jan 30th, 2007

    God and the FMS are one and the same.
    All religeons are one and the same.
    It’s just we humans like to make up little details to give us an excuse to wage war.

    @Lolli Popoff- I believe the old gag was “Lefty” and “Jill,” referencing that the thumb and forefinger of the right hand make a J shape, the middle an I, the ring and pinky Ls.

    Additionally, assuming God does exhist, who are we to say we know why he does things or what he’ll do. I mean, he’s GOD. He’ll do whatever he wants, and I don’t think any mortal brain is capable of comprehending omnipotence. If God wants us to eat him, well, why not? I’ll drink my wine as I dine on my pasta and bread, thank you much. I’m ok with that.

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  166. 166 - pastaman - Jan 30th, 2007

    “The concerned christians who post on this site are just as dumb. who the fuck cares about this little site?”

    You just did… thanks for cooperating with our cause

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  167. 167 - Jeff - Jan 30th, 2007

    I find it funny that he calls us a “little site” when this site gets more hits then any religious site hes ever been to.

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  168. 168 - Bill Tomlinson - Jan 30th, 2007

    lefty and righty?

    hehehehehehehehhehehehhehehehehehehhehehehehehheheh

    That was good!!!!!!!

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  169. 169 - Sladey - Jan 31st, 2007

    *Masculine* Meh, I have 4 girlfriends. And some boy friends. That makes me better than this Mr Nonsectarian.

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  170. 170 - Claprán - Jan 31st, 2007

    @ Dread Wench L’TUAE
    Do you really think girl fundies are allowed opinions? Remember, I said fundies, examples below the mental level of religiousness (or whatever the word is) don’t count

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  171. 171 - Homo narrans - Jan 31st, 2007

    of course. female fundies exist only to cook, clean and breed. and in the case of Becky Fisher (ala Jesus Camp), horribly corrupt young and innocent minds with psychological drivel and outright child-abuse.

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  172. 172 - Navigator Spider - Jan 31st, 2007

    ahoy all!
    if there are any female fundis who want to debate / argue/ mud wrestle then feel free to engage us here! i’m sure there’s many a pirate or wench that’d be glad to discuss /wrestle with you. i’m sure you can keep up with the usual drivel we get from your male counterpart, so come on put them to shame and accept the challenge!

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  173. 173 - Claprán - Jan 31st, 2007

    Careful, if you say they’re as good as the men, the men might get all threatened and lock them away so as to insure no little women ever upstage their warrior stance against us heatens

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  174. 174 - Claprán - Jan 31st, 2007

    Or heathens even…ahem

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  175. 175 - Beastly Rich - Jan 31st, 2007

    “heatens” Cos’ we are so hawt!

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  176. 176 - DutchPastaGuy - Jan 31st, 2007

    There was a post once by ‘a girl’ who said something like “Jesus saves…not religion” as answer to our religion bashing and there was some more drivel there. So she might turn into a woman fundie in a while. One who posts in this forum even.

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  177. 177 - Jean Bart - Jan 31st, 2007

    @PlagueChicken: “The idea of God sacrificing himself to himself in order to prevent himself sending us all to hell for committing sins because of the way he made us, and which he knew we were going to do anyway, is a little hard to swallow.”
    Did you formulate this on your own, or is it a quote? In the first case: great job! In the second: thanks for sharing it!
    RAmen to you Pirates!

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  178. 178 - Marc McOar - Jan 31st, 2007

    I just love this whole thread! Either that or my meds are kicking in.

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  179. 179 - Jamal Tamboa - Jan 31st, 2007

    Anyone from the Republic of the Congo Burundi or am I only one who owns a computer there?

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  180. 180 - Marc McOar - Jan 31st, 2007

    Hooray, and welcome to a Congo Burundian!

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  181. 181 - Dread Wench L’TUAE - Jan 31st, 2007

    “if there are any female fundis who want to debate / argue/ mud wrestle then feel free to engage us here! i’m sure there’s many a pirate or wench that’d be glad to discuss /wrestle with you.”
    Discuss, yes. Wrestle, mabey, but only if some form of punching is allowed, because I’m sure they’ll fight dirty. The catfights at my school are a sight to see.

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  182. 182 - Alchemist - Jan 31st, 2007

    Dread Wench.
    :) To rude to post :)

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  183. 183 - nonsectarian’s boyfriend - Jan 31st, 2007

    For those who believe nonsectarian has a girlfriend no proof is possible.
    For those who believe he has a boyfriend no proof is necessary.

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  184. 184 - Lolli Popoff - Jan 31st, 2007

    I’m impressed!
    I thought for sure he was into self mutilation.
    Er’ I meant self stimulation.

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  185. 185 - Bloody Dave Vain (Alchemist) - Jan 31st, 2007

    Hairy palms are an occupational hazard for some Lolli :)

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  186. 186 - Navigator Spider - Feb 1st, 2007

    Do hairy palms give an uinfair advantage in mud wrestling? (note to self must stop thinking out loud…)

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  187. 187 - gomer - Feb 1st, 2007

    hello, people. i was reading my Gospel today. i was drawn to the section regarding pirates and wisdom teeth. i have decided, in memory of our qnxestors, i will not have mine removed.
    holy are his meatballs,
    RAmen.

    PS I feel we should ALL ALWAYS write RAmen with capital R’s and A’s after posts. i feel its important for some unknown, probably dumb, reason.

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  188. 188 - Navigator Spider - Feb 1st, 2007

    Gomer, impressive as your dedication is, sometimes i write RAmen, sometimes the A is an a, sometime i don’t bother. There’s more important things to worry about. Relax, find some grog, all is well…..

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  189. 189 - TaintedKumquat - Feb 1st, 2007

    Hey all! my friend just pointed this site out to me today. i just wanted to say that FSM kicks ass!!

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  190. 190 - Jingles - Feb 2nd, 2007

    I know it’s a coupla days late (my comp poopied itself), but at L’tuae, if you want the ultimate female fundi, look no further than the dreaded BLR (May FSM protect me).

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  191. 191 - Homo narrans - Feb 2nd, 2007

    BLR was no regukar fundie…she was some kind of horrible, schizophrenic fundie-concentrate. no regular christian believes they are the reincarnation of the Virgin Mary

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  192. 192 - Jingles - Feb 2nd, 2007

    Hmmm… but going by their emails, they do think they are god, or at the very least, god’s hand on earth. Oh well.
    .
    Oh, and on a completely unrelated note, check this out…
    ( http://www.churchhopping.com/ten-verses-never-preached-on/#comment-1922 )

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  193. 193 - JonL - Feb 2nd, 2007

    @Jingles Feb 2nd, 2007 at 12:08 am
    “if you want the ultimate female fundi, look no further than the dreaded BLR (May FSM protect me).”
    Jingles how could you type the name that shall not be named!

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  194. 194 - Jingles - Feb 2nd, 2007

    Hahahahah… you have to push the boundaries. If there is no fear, there can be no fun. Anyway, it could be worse; I didn’t mention TLM…
    .
    OH SHI—–
    .
    .
    .
    Jingles
    Last seen cowering behind the couch, with bells on.

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  195. 195 - Daegen21 - Feb 2nd, 2007

    This is great. I love people who constantly post this propganda against our wonderful FSM. Yes I might be a christian, but FSM has a special place in my heart, and on my plate. As was said before me, to eat the FSM, is to worship the FSM.

    Oh…and you people writing hatemail? Try to be a little orginal with your posts please….I feel like I’m reading a forum full of 12 year olds trying, and failing, to be what the precieve as both “funny” and “cool.”

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  196. 196 - HeavyD - Feb 2nd, 2007

    @nonsectarian –
    1) Moron – See ‘Satire’
    2) The jokes on you – your girlfriend is my ex – so I ATE YOUR GIRLFRIEND.
    3) I also already used every orifice she has, so if you have been there, I have been there first. That’s right, I left my man juice in every orifice that woman has (she was freaky for me) so next time you kiss her, think about that.
    4) Our deity is not spagetti, that is just the form that he shows himself to us in. He could show up as a tree (not very mobile) or a donkey (hard to get respect) but he chose flying spagetti. It is hard to ignore flying spagetti.
    5) Quit being a hater. If I want to believe, and it does not impact your life, then LEAVE ME THE F**K ALONE.
    Thank you very much.
    John

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  197. 197 - Dread Wench L’TUAE - Feb 2nd, 2007

    Oh, BLR was a person? I used to think you guys were using an acronym for either a stupid association or that freaky movie.
    And a very great welcome to Tainted Kumquat!
    RAmen. Note the A.

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  198. 198 - The Xray - Feb 2nd, 2007

    Wow. Someone woke on the wrong side of the bed, huh?

    I’m Catholic, don’t like the jibes at Catholicism, but swings at ID is OK. Never heard of Girlfriends, either – here we have Concubines. Not supposed to, but…

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  199. 199 - Moth - Feb 3rd, 2007

    hi Pirates, I’m a bit of an athiest but respect your belief’s. My son came accross a leaflet on ID in his Religious Ed class here in South Australi, amongst other RE info brought in by a visiting youth minister. It was ‘Frequently Asked Questions – What about evolution?’ by christianityworks.com. He realized it gave a slanted view on creationalism and was not supposed to be there.
    So bieng a lover of the open sea, pasta Calabrese and equal opportunity, if the leaflets aren’t removed, he is going to put some FSM material out as well.
    Blessed Be, Moth

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  200. 200 - JonL - Feb 3rd, 2007

    @Moth
    “So being a lover of the open sea, pasta Calabrese and equal opportunity, if the leaflets aren’t removed, he is going to put some FSM material out as well.
    Blessed Be, Moth”
    .
    Excellent to hear from you. You’re son will have an army of converts in no time. No hard sell required. :)
    RAmen

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  201. 201 - Jingles - Feb 3rd, 2007

    @Moth
    .
    The Australian branch of the faith grows. Welcome aboard brother (or sister?), grogs on me.

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  202. 202 - DutchPastaGuy - Feb 3rd, 2007

    @Xray
    Sorry if you don´t like jibes at Catholicism, but it is among the more stupid flavours of Christianity, isn´t? And in view of the competiton, that is no small feat for sure. I know that as a Catholic you´re not supposed to think for yourself on religious matters and just follow the party line, but as you are posting here perhaps you would join in a bit of debate on it anyway?
    For instance, what are your thoughts about the Vatican proclaiming papal infallibility, i. e. if the pope hears the word of God then it must be true, a if he tells it to others, what he says must be true. So if the pope hears God say that pigeons are actually alien lizards that live by telekenetically sucking out peoples livers and eating them by shoving the livers up their tiny pigeons arses, then it must be true right? Your thoughts on papal infallibility, an explicitly and exclusively Catholic concept?
    Or what about geocentricity? After confining Galileo to house arrest it took the Catholic church 350 years to admit they were wrong and that the Earth circles the sun. They admitted that somewhere near the end of the 20th century, so we´re not talking long-dead cows here. Man had created space craft by then that had travelled through the galaxy, providing an outside look as to how the Earth circles the sun, for the really stubborn religious believers that needed extreme convincing. But nope, the CEO of the Catholic church corporation still kept up his denail of reality for years and years. And given Catholicisms sense of hierarchy (and depending on your age) you may have had to pay lip service to immoveable, central Earth too. Did you ever, and did you not feel that your adherence to Catholicism made you really, really stupid at that point?
    But feel free not to answer this one, I know that as a Catholic you´re not supposed to think for yourself on these matters.

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  203. 203 - Hisself - Feb 3rd, 2007

    Nonsectarian desplays his theological bias: ” Spaghetti is a food, i’ll eat your false deity, so screw it, ”
    and “or the record, fuck it i’ll eat you’re deity as well”.
    I think it is important to separate deity worship from ritual cannibalism such as the wholly Eucharist.
    Nothing in my beliefs in FSM worship requires transubstantiation. We’re already there.

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  204. 204 - PlagueChicken - Feb 3rd, 2007

    Sorry all…I cannot claim credit for the decidedly cool quote – but I have no idea where it came from. I have a file full of random napkin pieces upon which are scribbled all manner of random thoughts…

    Some are inspired by Arrogant Bastard, others by Sativa, some by Indica, and yet others by the lightheadedness I feel whenever I listen to too much religious drivel.

    Here’s a few more that may mean nothing…or something.

    Jesus tastes like Chicken.

    Allah: the other white meat.

    Who’s YOUR farmer?

    Church of Reformed Satan: Doing good in the name of evil.

    It is better to be the farmer than the chicken

    Cthulu – the other green god

    Peasowt!

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  205. 205 - Napuja - Feb 3rd, 2007

    Hey folks, I’m a bit new to the playground. I was hoping to join in on the fun and- Oh, where are my manners?
    .
    *ahem*
    .
    Arrr!
    .
    -maybe razz-a-ma-tazz a few of the good book thumpers with y’all. Soooo, do you need something swabbed? Or can I just head straight to the rum?
    .
    A noodly life for me….

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  206. 206 - Medicat - Feb 4th, 2007

    I was touched by the Noodly Appendage of Enlightement today

    I found this path and want to follow the teachings of the FSM

    Ramen!

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  207. 207 - Booty - Feb 4th, 2007

    Napuja – just head straight for the rum – no standing on ceremony for us – welcome aboard!

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  208. 208 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Feb 4th, 2007

    Welcome aboard Napuja & Medicat,

    Fifteen Meat-balls on a dead mans plate.
    All goes nicely with a bottle of rum.

    RAmen.

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  209. 209 - bill tomlinson - Feb 4th, 2007

    @HeavyD
    “Our deity is not spagetti, that is just the form that he shows himself to us in. He could show up as a tree (not very mobile) or a donkey (hard to get respect) but he chose flying spagetti. It is hard to ignore flying spagetti.”
    I don’t know when spaghetti was invented (I like your dropping of that pesty ‘h’) but there must have been a time before spaghetti when the FSM presented him/her/it self to people. They must have had a difficult time figuring out what “God” looked like. Maybe they thought “Hey Look. There he is. The Giant Worm Monster!”
    Later on, I suppose, the FWM became a stimulus to eaters everywhere (mostly everyone) who said “We can make some food that looks like our god but, let’s leave out the worms”. It may have been Leonardo, he invented everything else, and wa-laa the FWM became FSM. The being didn’t change, mind you, but the way to understand his form had moved to a different paradigm. I’m not quite sure why people still think of him as a ‘monster’. Does he behave ‘monsterly’? Or is he large and a ‘monstrosity’? That could be the next paradigm shift, i suppose.
    I still find it odd that “The Flying Spaghetti Monster” doesn’t have a name. If a phrase starts with a ‘The’, it is just a description, not a name. I don’t suppose he might really be Negativo. Nah, but then again, there are stranger things in the world.
    RAmen

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  210. 210 - stephen - Feb 4th, 2007

    i did enjoy nonsectarian’s diatribe :-)) but i also forgot my postscript:”who’s” for whose;”refeuling”(a typo?) etc. can we get a grip? pps.i actually do have a girlfriend,isn’t real life amazing?!

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  211. 211 - Fred - Feb 4th, 2007

    i’ll say he is right about stuped fucked up shithead cristins being asses and NOBODY listens to them
    they just want to be heard
    every last one of them are stuped fucked up shitheads

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  212. 212 - bill tomlinson - Feb 4th, 2007

    @Fred
    Anger management classes, Fred
    Bring it down a notch.
    Seriously. Don’t let them upset you that much. Most of us had to go through the hard part of getting past what had been done to us. But we can be better people than them by moving on.

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  213. 213 - bill tomlinson - Feb 4th, 2007

    @everybody
    I think maybe I didn’t understand Fred. Could you state your position more directly? And I’m not that smart, without satire.

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  214. 214 - Medicat - Feb 5th, 2007

    The Christians that visit this site to harass are just scared that their beliefs are wrong, and that’s why they try to disqualify the FSM teachings

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  215. 215 - lizzy - Feb 6th, 2007

    I totally agree Medicat

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  216. 216 - Lolli Popoff - Feb 6th, 2007

    bill tomlinson Feb 4th, 2007 at 7:15 pm

    @everybody
    I think maybe I didn’t understand Fred.
    .
    Fred sounds to be about 14 and not that smart to begin with.
    Maybe the FSM will touch him allover.
    Ramen

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  217. 217 - Mokkie - Feb 6th, 2007

    Well, that was lovely. No need to explain to me what a girlfriend is, I am a proud girlfriend of a good man who doesn’t have dirty language such as yours. Though I doubt you’ll look at this, feel welcome to be here by this person. Christians aren’t idiots in general, but they are humans. Humans in numbers mixed up about things they haven’t taken time to be objective about aren’t very bright. You seem to be very hot on insulting people who post on this site, while forgetting that you yourself are posting on it, drawing attention to yourself. Have fun with your hopefully lovely lady, be a good boy, stay safe, don’t do drugs, and stay in school.
    **
    Mokkie and all that jazz.

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  218. 218 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Feb 7th, 2007

    This ’spaghetti is food’ argument is a bit weak.

    The Quakers are a mainstream religion and they worship porridge.

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  219. 219 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Feb 7th, 2007

    Probably.

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  220. 220 - Rob - Feb 7th, 2007

    or does porridge worship quaker?

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  221. 221 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Feb 8th, 2007

    Rob, you’re like blue eye shadow man.
    .
    Deep.
    .
    Real deep.

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  222. 222 - Rob - Feb 8th, 2007

    I’m just saying, logically, it would seem like porridge would worship quaker because on each of the porridge’s tiny box houses, they have a picture of the quaker guy. if u looked in the quaker guy’s biography, ur not gonna see a lot of picture’s of porridge.

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  223. 223 - Lolli Popoff - Feb 8th, 2007

    Thats like asking the mennonites to worship
    Smokey the bear.

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  224. 224 - Rob - Feb 9th, 2007

    i don’t know what the hell a mennonite is.

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  225. 225 - The Flying Tree Toad Misses His Wench :) - Feb 9th, 2007

    Rob Feb 9th, 2007 at 11:21 pm

    i don’t know what the hell a mennonite is.
    .
    Then you sure as hell don’t know what a quaker is.

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  226. 226 - Rob - Feb 9th, 2007

    I know what a quaker is. they believe in basic christian beliefs but they’re a lot calmer and don’t believe in violence.

    and i don’t know what a mennonite is.

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  227. 227 - The Flying Tree Toad Misses His Wench :) - Feb 9th, 2007

    hahahahahaha

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  228. 228 - Rob - Feb 9th, 2007

    DOOUUSSHHHE BAAAAAAAAAG!!!!!!

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  229. 229 - Yoru Kaze - Feb 10th, 2007

    im a christian, have a girlfriend, love violence, drink on occasion, and have fun. enjoy ur pasta fetish fag bags.

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  230. 230 - Peter Popoff - Feb 10th, 2007

    Yoru Kaze Feb 10th, 2007 at 2:30 pm

    im a christian, have a girlfriend, love violence, drink on occasion, and have fun. enjoy ur pasta fetish fag bags.
    .
    I’m a man, I have a wife. I’m not gay, but some of my homosexual friends are gay.
    I don’t like violence, but I’ll bet one of my gay friends, could kick your ass.
    Oh, I almost forgot! I’ve got a swimming pool!
    Do you have a swimming pool?

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  231. 231 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Feb 10th, 2007

    @Rob

    Are mennonite the ones that stick up or hang down?

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  232. 232 - bill - Feb 10th, 2007

    @Peter Popoff
    We get so many Christians on here talking about their girlfriend. I wonder if she gets tired of all of them talking about her like that.

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  233. 233 - bill - Feb 10th, 2007

    @Captain
    You’ve been watching Jon Stewart again, haven’t you?

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  234. 234 - Peter Popoff - Feb 10th, 2007

    bill Feb 10th, 2007 at 2:53 pm

    @Peter Popoff
    We get so many Christians on here talking about their girlfriend. I wonder if she gets tired of all of them talking about her like that.
    .
    That’s no joke Bill.
    About 99% of them have to point that out, makes one wonder…
    And they must point out that we are all gay too… Huuummmmmm
    I wonder…
    I wonder why they come here? Maybe for some good ol’ gay advice?

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  235. 235 - bill - Feb 10th, 2007

    @Peter Popoff
    But it is a joke
    I wonder if “she” gets tired of “all of them” talking about “her” like that. Did you get it? I was trying to find the best way to crack the joke but maybe it’s easy to miss it this way. I’ll work on it

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  236. 236 - Peter Popoff - Feb 10th, 2007

    bill Feb 10th, 2007 at 3:27 pm

    @Peter Popoff
    But it is a joke
    I wonder if “she” gets tired of “all of them” talking about “her” like that. Did you get it? I was trying to find the best way to crack the joke but maybe it’s easy to miss it this way. I’ll work on it
    .
    hahaha,
    Shouldn’t pick on Mary that way.
    I’m not with it today, haven’t had my daily dosages
    of beer yet.

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  237. 237 - Marc McOar - Feb 10th, 2007

    P.P., hop to it! I’m on #2.

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  238. 238 - Rowdy Wench - Feb 10th, 2007

    @Rob – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mennonites
    Maybe more than you wanted to know…

    @Bill – I thought the girlfriend joke was great!

    Off to make a beer run – we are apparently only good for the next hour or so. Must fix!

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  239. 239 - Rob - Feb 11th, 2007

    may the flying spaghetti monster bring u great beer volcanoes in the afterlife.

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  240. 240 - Peter Popoff - Feb 11th, 2007

    Marc McOar Feb 10th, 2007 at 3:37 pm

    P.P., hop to it! I’m on #2.
    .
    #5

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  241. 241 - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA - Feb 11th, 2007

    Very occasionally and only for about a second I feel sorry for the fundie.
    Even if they have a girl friend they can’t have sex [guilt].
    Can’t have a wank [more guilt].
    Can’t have a go at each other [even more guilt].
    .
    No wonder they’re so up tight.
    .
    Then it passes. Guys sort your own lives out and stop bothering us you saddos.

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  242. 242 - Alchemist - Feb 11th, 2007

    Peter. Don’t tell me you’re ignoring me too!

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  243. 243 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Alchemist
    Ignoring you? Why would anyone ignore you?

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  244. 244 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    Little games?

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  245. 245 - Peter Popoff - Feb 11th, 2007

    #7

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  246. 246 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    Looks like you may have picked an unapproved friend Alchemist :)

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  247. 247 - Alchemist - Feb 11th, 2007

    Peter. Please don’t tell me all of this is because I said I like Thumper? Pardon me for being an individual. I think you’re fantastic but I can have other friends.
    .
    Thumper did go too far but I know him for who he is. That’s a good person. Seriously. I’ve never met him but I’d like to.
    .
    So sue me for being me!

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  248. 248 - Peter Popoff - Feb 11th, 2007

    Wench Nikkiee Feb 11th, 2007 at 4:25 pm

    Looks like you may have picked an unapproved friend Alchemist :)
    .
    Now why would you say that?
    #8

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  249. 249 - Thumper - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Wench Nikkiee
    Tis true!!! Poor Alchemist is being persecuted for his beliefs touting tolerance and an open mind…even when confronted by an Ultra Mega Fundamentalist, arrogant, irrational and often obnoxious Aussies like poor ole Thumpie.
    .
    Well…this simply will not do. Alchemist my friend I salute you for your patience and common sense when dealing with the wabbit and bid all the Pastafarians “fare-the-well”. Time to retire.
    .
    Has been a pleasure Wench Nikkiee and send on my regards to Jingles, Mr Tomlinson, Pixel Pop and Varthonai.
    .
    I’ll be back only in the Archives or at the hands of an imposter (i.e. Marc or Popoff)…don’t eat rockbadger and there’s no such thing as monsters…

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  250. 250 - Peter Popoff - Feb 11th, 2007

    Alchemist Feb 11th, 2007 at 4:34 pm

    Peter. Please don’t tell me all of this is because I said I like Thumper? Pardon me for being an individual. I think you’re fantastic but I can have other friends.
    .
    Thumper did go too far but I know him for who he is. That’s a good person. Seriously. I’ve never met him but I’d like to.
    .
    So sue me for being me!
    .
    All what Alchemist?
    Like whoever you want to like? Free will bro.
    I’ll do the same, Ok?
    Thumps and good person? Ok. If you say so.

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  251. 251 - Alchemist - Feb 11th, 2007

    @ Peter.
    “Like whoever you want to like? Free will bro.
    I’ll do the same, Ok?
    Thumps and good person? Ok. If you say so.”
    .
    I thought you were an ok person. The second I say something that you don’t agree with you have at me!
    .
    To much fucking drama for me! I am me. I like those that I like and will not conform. I will NOT follow the views of others unless I agree.
    .
    What’s fucking well wrong with that eh!
    .
    If you want to play silly twats with me then I will play.

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  252. 252 - Peter Popoff - Feb 11th, 2007

    It was all in the email Alchemist.
    I told you my reasons, I have nothing to add.
    I never told you who to like? I only told you the reasons why I consider my friends, friends.
    Nothing more, nothing less.
    Again, like whoever you want too.
    I’ll do the same.
    I won’t play “silly twats” with you. I don’t even know the game.
    Put it to rest already, I have.

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  253. 253 - Alchemist - Feb 11th, 2007

    I haven’t!

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  254. 254 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Thumper Feb 11th, 2007 at 4:42 pm
    “I’ll be back only in the Archives or at the hands of an imposter”
    That’s a bummer Thumper. I really enjoy reading your posts….the ones that are genuinely yours that is :)
    Anyway to change your mind?

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  255. 255 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    Why is it ok for the self elected CoFSM board police to pose as fundies while someone who actually understands intelligent satire is undermined and treated in the shabbiest way?

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  256. 256 - Peter Popoff - Feb 11th, 2007

    Wench Nikkiee Feb 11th, 2007 at 5:32 pm

    Why is it ok for the self elected CoFSM board police to pose as fundies while someone who actually understands intelligent satire is undermined and treated in the shabbiest way?
    .
    That’s a really good question!
    Why don’t you answer it for us?
    That question has been “getting under my skin” for awhile now.

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  257. 257 - Rowdy Wench - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Rob – thanks!

    @CNS – First, thanks for expaining what TBHNA is – I’ve been wondering! A friend of mine’s boyfriend actually wrote essays in High School about how guilty he felt for even wanting to have a wank. He gave up being Catholic, gave up the guilt and is much better for it. I’ve had to also give up a lot of guilt (Catholic upbringing) myself. It’s a terrible way to grow up, and certainly does lead to a high level of uptight.

    Post and run tonight – got people coming for dinner.

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  258. 258 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    It’s not just been you either Thumper…. you’ve obviously noticed.
    The attempts at the undermining myslef certainly don’t bother me….as I’ve told a few others. I find it rather amusing. Sorts the wheat from the chaff :)
    It’s like someone calling you a name or something….such schoolyard immaturity …..boring. Maybe some just really don’t have the lives they pretend to after all!

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  259. 259 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Poppof
    “getting under my skin”
    Oh you mean like on the “Religion good or Bad thread”?
    You know the “back up my wank or I’ll throw a tizz”

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  260. 260 - Flower - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Wench Nikkiee
    Thumper says he’ll only come back if that nasty Popoff apologises to poor Alchemist…publicly…which Thumper says he won’t… because Popoff’s just too stoopid…and jealous that Thumper’s such a handsome wabbit.

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  261. 261 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    “That’s a really good question!”
    Seems to me I’ve been one opf the few to stand up for everyones right to post at CoFSM. I certainly don’t change my name to try and make someone like bad because they are having a discussion I don’t like.
    Those posts trying to undermine bill were pretty low in my opinion! As were the Thumper impersonations. That really is a sad tactic. Only sad people pull sad stunts like that.
    In my humble opinion :)

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  262. 262 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Flower
    “because Popoff’s just too stoopid…and jealous that Thumper’s such a handsome wabbit.”
    You tell Thumper Nikkiee said she thinks he is quite observant…..for a wabbit :)

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  263. 263 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Flower
    Also tell Thumper that in my opinion, Alchemist is more than capable.
    Hi Alchemist :)

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  264. 264 - Pixel Pop - Feb 11th, 2007

    Are Petey and Alchemist getting in a sissy fight? This I have to watch!
    RAmen

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  265. 265 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    I know who my money’s on Pixel :)

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  266. 266 - Flower - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Wench Nikkiee
    “Also tell Thumper that in my opinion, Alchemist is more than capable.”
    .
    Thumpie agrees…and he went on to say that Alchemist is a fine Pastafarian and very fine friend who wouldn’t desert another friend just because it was “convenient” or “popular” for him to do so…in Thumpers opinion this was “noodley”…but he still doesn’t believe in monsters.

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  267. 267 - Pixel Pop - Feb 11th, 2007

    Place your bets people… you might just double your money, house keeps ten percent :)
    @Wench Nikkiee
    Who?
    RAmen

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  268. 268 - Alchemist - Feb 11th, 2007

    Nasty Peter is a nice guy!
    If he doesn’t give me a good reason (other than liking Thumper) for his words to me then he can shove his head up his ring and pray to FSM for deliverance. I can play with the big boys!

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  269. 269 - Peter Popoff - Feb 11th, 2007

    Pixel Pop Feb 11th, 2007 at 6:14 pm

    Place your bets people… you might just double your money, house keeps ten percent :)
    @Wench Nikkiee
    Who?
    RAmen
    .
    hahaha, Pixley Dude!
    It’s gone to stupid. I’ll bet on myself,
    Thank you very muchly!

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  270. 270 - Pixel Pop - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Petey
    My bets are on you bro, go get ‘im!
    Sorry Alchemist, but Petey needs all the support he can get, we are, after all, flanking Albany.
    How drunk are you right now Petey?
    RAmen

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  271. 271 - Alchemist - Feb 11th, 2007

    No problem Pixel :)
    If Mr Holier than Thou wants to take it up then I’m here. I’ll even start the ball rolling with
    POT / KETTLE

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  272. 272 - Alchemist - Feb 11th, 2007

    Peter.
    “It’s gone to stupid. I’ll bet on myself,
    Thank you very muchly!”
    .
    whoooooo. Time to get that ego trimmed mate!

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  273. 273 - Alchemist - Feb 11th, 2007

    You didn’t reply to my email so I assume the game is on!

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  274. 274 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Pixel Pop
    Being involved in scientific endeavour I have a habit of collecting evidence (covered a little forenscis in the past). Always comes in handy. Not telling you my bet til I see what odds are on offer!

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  275. 275 - Wench Nikkiee - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Pixel
    “How drunk are you right now Petey?”
    You mean there is sober?

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  276. 276 - Pixel Pop - Feb 11th, 2007

    @Petey and Alchemist
    I want a fair fight, nothing below the belt and certainly no frying pans!
    @Wench Nikkiee
    I understand, but it’s my obligation to back up Petey, he’s my buddy! Not that you aren’t Alchemist, but I don’t see you flanking Albany!
    RAmen

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  277. 277 - Touched One - Feb 13th, 2007

    You cannot eat the FSM, he is invisible, and he passes through matter easily. Also he flys so you couldn’t reach him.

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  278. 278 - Shinysheep - Feb 14th, 2007

    @ avatar of Reason
    “We don’t use crack; we use alcohol. You clearly don’t understand us very well.”

    I’ve been wondering. does anyone think theres a pot forest or a grow-op up in FSM heaven? I mean, I’ll be fine with booze, but it’s just a matter of personal interest.

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  279. 279 - The FSM loves you - Feb 14th, 2007

    I don’t think the FSM is all in favor of addiction. Unless it’s an addiction to pasta.
    Me

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  280. 280 - aliasxerog - Feb 15th, 2007

    we don’t eat our deity. We eat the wonderful food he prevides us. He is very generious for letting us eat the holy food that he made in his image.

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  281. 281 - paulo - Feb 27th, 2007

    @nonsectarian

    “you’re all just a bunch of nerds who decided that it might be funny to listen to the crackhead”

    Is THAT funny? What YOU say is funny? Or is it serious? I’m so dumb and nerd I cannot even get it.

    Teach us!

    You know life man!
    Oh you’re so enlightening, oh so much hate and appetite you do have! That must feel wonderful.

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  282. 282 - sprite - Feb 27th, 2007

    “i’m gonna go to my girlfriends house now. i’ll explain what a girlfriend is to you later.” Mate im sorry to break it on you but a girlfriend is someone who actually communicates with you not someone you watch from behind a bush furiously beating the bishop sorry to dissapoint but… get a life

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  283. 283 - Jesus Eater - Mar 5th, 2007

    @nonsectarian
    “1. Spaghetti is a food, i’ll eat your false deity, so screw it, you all can go die”
    Well, fine! I’ll go eat Jesus with enough respect to add some cruton-o-christ or whatever you call that flake of skin you call bread! Oh and i’ll screw him too! But i’m going over to your girlfriends house now, she’ll explain that later. Oh, she is a pastafarian too, she has some great lasagna between her legs.

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  284. 284 - Higsio - Mar 20th, 2007

    by girlfriend do you mean that piece of rabbit furr you rub on your dick every night?

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  285. 285 - meera - Mar 24th, 2007

    India!

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  286. 286 - ShinyGorgbad - Mar 29th, 2007

    Right… okay…. I am confused…
    This “man” is complaining that people are drawing attention towards FSM – may we long be touched by his noodly appendage, by posting on the site? Well done my friend, well done.
    Oh and the whole “nerd” thing; see the thing that makes people like us different from people like you, is that we have what is called “intellegence”, I can explain it later if you want, but somehow I don’t expect you to understand tersm like: “intellectual stimulus”, “intelligent debate”, “logical thought” or much above a 4 letter word – you probably got this mystical “girlfriend” – who you are probably paying, to write your post for you.
    Well done, well done
    Shiny Gorbad

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  287. 287 - Suck My Balls - Apr 16th, 2007

    This man is saying yout retarted as fuck and youll are.

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  288. 288 - ShinyGorgbad - May 12th, 2007

    Nice rebut… literate… “youll”?

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  289. 289 - Spikes on a *Tool* - May 16th, 2007

    Oooookaaaay…..
    .
    First off: If you’re going flame us, can you at least give common courtesy and do it properly? There’s this wonderful thing…It’s called SPELL CHECK*flashy lights*. It should be on most web browsers. And if you can’t find it on your browser, it should be easily downloaded.
    .
    Secondly: Last time I checked, we worship the FLYING spaghetti MONSTER. Have you eaten any flying spaghetti monsters lately?
    .
    Thirdly: I’m not completely sure you even know what half the words you used are. If you’re going to shoot off your mouth like that, make sure you have a dictionary with you.
    .
    Lastly: I bid you good day, and in the future I hope that you come to terms with the reality that there are many different people in this world, and not all of them with agree with your stupid views of the world.

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  290. 290 - joe - Jun 25th, 2007

    Hang on “You’re only drawing attention to it by posting”?
    And BTW, how can you eat the resembleance of an invisible, non-existent being- God, for those of you who don’t realise.

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  291. 291 - Corrassian - Sep 23rd, 2007

    nonsectarian
    i think u got da crack on da brain weird dude

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  292. 292 - LOL - Mar 8th, 2009

    LOL.

    Same fervour displayed by all religious nutjobs. Hence Spaghetti Monster point is proven yet again.

    Say hi to Mary Magdalene, I mean your girlfriend. Tell her i said THANKS!

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  293. 293 - luv jain - Apr 8th, 2009

    “”1. Spaghetti is a food, i’ll eat your false deity, so screw it, you all can go die”"

    FSM created sppaghtii so we coud all enjoy his noodly goodness (which has been lost on u)

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American




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