Hey, so rather than get an ordinary yacht to sail around the world
spreading the FSM faith, why not something a little more pirate-like.
I was in Bonaire with my family and this Junk was docked there and
seemed sufficiently pirate-like for you.–Dan
I like it. Let’s brainstorm fundraising ideas. Also, we’ll need to figure out how ship-time will be organized. Ideas/Volunteers?
The Church of the FSM is always looking for content. Details here
The Church is funded entirely by your purchases of FSM merchandise. Thank you for your support.
Purchase from
Amazon.com
Purchase from BN.com
An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
Add these buttons to your site:
Bobby's Blog
Contact Bobby: Contact Me
|
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 License. This means you're free to use the content but not sell it. More Details |
I like the sound of a bikini car wash; it’s classic enough to work, and the people who go to them usualy don’ care to what casue it goes to, so we could even get some Christians to donate!
And for the crew, I have lived near the water a lot of my life, so I have no fear of sailing. Unfourtionitly, I, too, could only go during my summers, what with collage and such. I could do anything you need me to do, if you teach me…
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“We’ve got the book, how about a movie?”
.
Got any titles in mind? My seriously fatigued brain cvan only come up with “You, me and Ditalini”.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Jingles, you’re brilliant. Just brilliant.
.
Thumper, why do I have the feeling you’re actually on our side?…
.
Mike, that wasn’t a very nice thing to say to a girl. Please curb your offensive language.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Captain Mad John Kidd, you’ve got something there. A movie is the next logical step (said Spock). I’m sure we’d ALL be willing to act in it, and I’m sure there’s some really talented college students on this site who are involved in film, media, what-not. It could happen. I mean, they did the play in SoCal… I think a movie could be a realistic goal!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
RAAAAaaaaaamen!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
A Flock of Parrots?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“Wench Beth Jan 25th, 2007 at 12:52 pm
To Navigator Spider… can you perform weddings on a ship?”
yes you can, and i have a confession (hangs head in shame) one of my duties as an officer was to run church services. Not sure it was what you could call “traditional” once i had customised it a bit but i had fun ;-) i always made sure there was grog to follow, great at 11 in the morning!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Actually, I was thinking more along the lines of animation like South Park or Sponge Bob. With scenes of Pastafarian Heaven, the beer volcanos, the stripper factory. Animee strippers would be cool, though that might be leaning towards an adult film like The Nine Lives of Felix the Cat.
That said, I think a live-action documentary following the life of a Pastafarian missionary on a conversion crusade can’t be bad. Maybe splice in some animee strippers and the volcano for effect.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Nice one, Spider. I served aboard a US Naval destroyer as a petty officer. Originally from the UK, I acquired a US citizenship through the service. Never performed a wedding ceremony though. Props.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Sorry – going way back up the thread – I was certainly NOT washing up on the south coast! I haven’t done any washing up for ages, as the state of my kitchen will prove!
It was an imposter I tell you!
And if you are going to plunder me Spider can you let me know first so I can do my hair? ;)
I think the animation film is a good idea :)
Don’t stress about the church services Spider, we all have skeletons in our closets!
Well, we’re pirates, what do you expect!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Plunder? i don’t remember mentioning it but yyaaaaarrr! sounds fun.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Oh, maybe it was someone else…..
*scurries back up the thread to check….*
Oh! It was Jingles – sorry!
Well, the same applies to you anyway ;)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Yarrrr. I spy wenches then, let go the anchor and prepare the gig. shorebound for grog, plundering, grog, pillaging and grog. (rearrange as necessary) last one to to run through a lubber is to be keel hauled and have their grog shared out…..
.
(needless to say, insert wenches/pirates, pirates who dress as wenches or vice versa as appropriate. if it floats ya boat and they fancy it it’s all good)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I know, I already posted this the haikus thread, but my swelled ego won’t let me alone until I put it here to. Some minor changes
.
—
I had some spare time, you can just try to imagine the tune (or make up your own):
.
Background chant: Yo ho ho ho, Yo ho ho ho (In a piratey sort of way)
.
Leader: (sorry, couldn’t really piraticize his/her speech yet)
It’s great to be a pirate an’ to sail th’ seven seas,
It’s great to serve the FSM, and do just what we please,
We all worship his noodleyness and drink volcanic beer,
And fight the fundamentalists will jolly pirate cheer!
.
Chorus:
For science! For science!
We sail the ocean wide!
For science! For science!
And make the fundies hide!
For science! For science!
And drop the global temp!
For science and the FSM we sail towards tax exempt!
.
Leader:
Now you all know the story of the famous Davy Jones,
His locker is the storage place of all good pirates bones,
We’d really like to join them but we have a place reserved:
Up in the stripper factory, and does that make us perves!?
.
Chorus
.
Leader:
Perhaps you’ve heard some anecdotes of hate-mail on our site,
It keeps us strong and has us up late laughing every night,
We wonder why they think that we will burn for what we say,
When they say that the place we’ll burn is up in cold Norway
.
Chorus
.
All together:
The FSM, the FSM, the great Noodly Monster,
For science and the FSM, we give a hearty Aaaarrrhh!
RAmen
.
RAmen, and feel free to make any changes you like!
—
.
Would it work for the raids?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Gnocci, every ship needs someone to lead the shanties. consider yourself pressganged! (i can’t help hearing the whole thing with a slight viking bassline to it…)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Yaaay! I get to be the shantyman!? WOOOHOOOOO!
.
As to the viking bassline, I think it might have that in my tune, too. Cool.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
i just discovered the best noodleage machine EVAR!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1kvdq8cRNBM
shame about the shouty, non-english comentry.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
We could have a convention-esque party. People could sell FSM related material, pirate clothing, and other interesting items. There could be a sermon and a spaghetti dinner. I think it would be a wonderful opportunity to spread the Truth and meet fellow Pastafarians. Although, I think we should keep the scarcely clothed wenches for a different gathering. It would be nice to bring little Pastafarians too, plus we don’t want people to get the wrong idea about the FSM.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
To Gnocci Man… LOL! Your song is the BEST! What a great job. You should join the FSM poetry group!…. NOT!! JUST KIDDING!! Anyway, you’re quite talented and I mean that.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
To Navigator Spider… re: the weddings, RAmen to you and a bottle of rum!! Arrrrrr!!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
See gnocci? all the wenches always go for the artistic types ;-) the rest of us have to make do with pillaging and plundering till we make shore at the beer volcano!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
There was lots of rum (and sherry and ginger wine for some reason, and definitely lots of biscuits) however, i just ran “normal” services not weddings although the captain did have the power to. I used to ham it right up though, funny thing is though becasue i’m no hypocrite i told the regular congregation i was atheist up front and they still wanted me to do it! i even got a bigger crown than the padre when he visited! (take that god-botherer, pirates kick arse.)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
To Kristina… now we’re talking! A convention-esque party! Brilliant! I wish I had thought of your idea myself. Conventions are the greatest and have the potential to raise a LOT of awareness and money, too :) I agree with you totally about keeping the party “family-oriented” — we at least want to SEEM like a family religion! (wink, wink) Although… at all the Star Trek conventions I’ve been to (lost count) those scantily clad alien women sure got a lot of attention ;)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
No, no, Navigator Spider, we love you just as much! Pillaging and plundering are the essential qualities of pirates! Arrrr! Everyone has their own talents ;) I think it would have been hysterical to watch you do a service or wedding. LOL!!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I like the convention idea. maybe on talk like a pirate day, pastafarians should gather in various places around the globe, celebrate with beer, grog noddles etc, basking in the knowledge its all part of a giant global plundering session….
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Why wait for September!? Lets just gather every Friday! I’ll bring the chips, dip, and ramens!
.
@Wench Beth
Thanks… I think… ;)
Don’t worry, I pillage and plunder as well. What ’s the point in being a pirate if you aren’t going to partake in such activities? I’ll just do poetry & such in my free time. And who wouldn’t want to see a wedding performed by those of piratical pursuit!?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
by the way, hate to break the happy note thise thread was on, but if you havn’t been to this site yet, then it is time you saw one of the deepest dens of depravity and homophobia ever to burden the world wide web. WBC.
.
http://www.godhatesfags.com/main/index.html
.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
To Gnocci Man… sorry I wasn’t clear! I was giving you a total compliment. The FSM poetry group is a bunch of goofballs; that’s why I made that comment. Your piratey song is BRILLIANT!!!! I wish I had that talent!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
And Gnocci Man, I know you are a real pirate who pillages and plunders as well… and you have that extra talent! (Basically I’m down on my knees apologizing for not enough clarity :)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
@Wench Beth
I was kinda joking too, and no insult was taken in the first place. No need to worry! All doth still be cool.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
@Wench Beth
ps.
I didn’t realise how unpleasant my post sounded when I wrote it, I should be the one apologising!
(falls down on knees and apologizes for accidental rudeness)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Gnocci Man– Best. Song. Ever.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
i have a question, sorry that i have to ask this here, but i did not find any forum
ok, how many of you TRULY belive that a FSM created the world, and how many are just atheists that join the FSM to make a statement ?
i mean it seemed obvious when i first found this site on the net, but now i am starting to worry
-Bubba
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“ok, how many of you TRULY belive that a FSM created the world”
Well, Bubba, I think that we all have faith that gravity exists, and that is prima facie evidence that the FSM is using his noodly appendages in positive, glorious ways. RAmen.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“ok, how many of you TRULY belive that a FSM created the world”
How many do YOU think? Just out of curiosity.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
To Bubba… I truly believe that *THE* Flying Spaghetti Monster created the universe, not *A* Flying Spaghetti Monster. There is only one and He is omnipresent, omniscient, and tastes really yummy.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
yaarrg! That ship be the shit!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
@Wench Beth. You have some problems if you really believe that. Read the Bible.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
@Thumper Jan 26th, 2007 at 8:48 pm
” You have some problems if you really believe that. Read the Bible.”
.
Why is the bible true and all other holy book creation stories, such as the GoFSM, wrong?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
There is only one Bible. Not these made up money making lies.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
@Bubba,
“I have a question, sorry that i have to ask this here, but i did not find any forum”
.
Try http://www.venganza.org/forum :p
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
@God is Good Jan 26th, 2007 at 9:50 pm
“There is only one Bible. Not these made up money making lies.”
Can you prove they are lies?
On another note, how many christianity proponents have appeared in court on fraud/other charges?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I only want to help you. Not fight with you.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
@God is Good Jan 26th, 2007 at 9:50 pm
“There is only one Bible.”
The muslims are also convinced that their own holy book is the only truth, to the extent of sacrificing their lives for it??
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
@God is Good Jan 26th, 2007 at 10:13 pm
“I only want to help you. Not fight with you.”
.
You haven’t given anyone here any reason to believe they need help?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Fine if you don’t. I just want to help.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
@God is Good Jan 26th, 2007 at 10:13 pm
“I only want to help you. Not fight with you.”
.
Do you mistake pertinent questioning for fighting?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“I just want to help.”
.
THEN PLEASE OH PLEASE GET YOUR CHURCH TO STOP PREACHING THAT CONDOMS DON’T WORK TO AFRICANS AT RISK FROM AIDS!
.
That is one of the greatest evils on the face of the planet.
.
Our souls don’t need saving, because we’re going to a different heaven than you, and ours has beer and strippers.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Man is not perfect. I’ll be the first to admit. But I want to help all of you.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
@Jingles Jan 26th, 2007 at 10:40 pm
“THEN PLEASE OH PLEASE GET YOUR CHURCH TO STOP PREACHING THAT CONDOMS DON’T WORK TO AFRICANS AT RISK FROM AIDS!”
.
RAmen Jingles. A request that deserves capitalisation. RAmen
Like or Dislike:
0 
0