In praise of an alternate creation theory

Published by henderob January 7th, 2007 in Recognition, General FSM news and Spread the Word.

Leslie Scrivener has written an excellent article, In praise of an alternate creation theory, in the Toronto Star.

From the department of one scientific theory is as good as another, comes the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

The theory goes like this: the Earth and all living things were created by a Supreme Being, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and though there are no witnesses to creation, there are written accounts of it.

In time, men and women heard of the spaghetti monster and came to worship him. And as the word spread, a gospel was written and churches were established in his name.

And artists, inspired by his word, drew his image â€“ a tangled mass of pasta, with two generous meatballs, and googly eyes protruding from stalks.

Since the Flying Spaghetti Monster was revealed in 2005, millions have seen his image or read about him and his teachings, on the Internet site www.venganza.org and also in a book published last year, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

…

Read the article HERE.

248 Responses to “In praise of an alternate creation theory”

Pages: « 1 2 3 4 [5] 6 7 8 9 … 13 » Show All

81 - January 9th, 2007 at 2:11 pm - Beastly Rich Says:

so. many. posts.
82 - January 9th, 2007 at 2:12 pm - Peter Popoff Says:

Hi Captian, thanks for the support!
I want you and everybody to know…
That as soon as I’m elected, my first rule of order will be to invite the entire CoFSM.
To the white house, for a complete makeover of the Oral Office.
I want it done up FSM style!
Ramen
83 - January 9th, 2007 at 2:19 pm - Booty Says:

Oh cool!
Can I get a lift in Airforce One?
Please?
84 - January 9th, 2007 at 2:19 pm - Booty Says:

I am quite handy with a paintbrush - we’ve got some spare white emulsion in the garage - shall I bring it along?
85 - January 9th, 2007 at 2:27 pm - new noodle Says:

@ Booty
Alas I may be a new noodle but am no longer a young woman, such a shame, the body ages but the mind sometimes forgets it has
@Captain Noodlulous
I am a Canadian eh so can’t vote for Peter in the next election but would help with the campaign, especially if I can partake of “communion” all Sunday afternoon
86 - January 9th, 2007 at 2:46 pm - Al Dente Says:

Seasoned greetings. I just read about the Flying Spaghetti Monster (Cheese be upon Him) in the Toronto Star and visited your site. Please allow me a brief rant. I cannot believe that a nation as accomplished as yours, that was a leader in science and technology, that even put men on the Moon, is so troubled by fringe groups that now seem to control your national agenda. I do not mind freedom of worship but when sickness goes untreated because stem cells are little people, when exponential population growth and consumption is seen as sustainable, and when global war and environmental destruction are to be encouraged to bring about the end of times and Rapture, then their beliefs affect everyone on this planet. I am relieved however to see the many Americans who wrote in support of your site, so perhaps things are not as bad as they would seem on your news networks. I hope things do not get like this here in Canada but we have already had one national party leader who believed men and dinosaurs walked together.
It would be so much better if they did not try to twist science to support their beliefs and then teach these bizarre ideas to children. I do not see how they could grow up to work in a scientific field and pick and choose what to believe from science or faith. I would not want such people to design the airplane I fly in or the nuclear power plant next door. It would be far better for both sides if they simply felt that the strata, the fossils, the isotopes, the mountains and the light from distant stars was created in situ 6000 years ago to perhaps tempt the faithless. They could learn the science properly then go to Church and say â€œYes, but ALL that evidence suddenly appeared in 7 daysâ€. No conflict there. No need to try and prove men and dinosaurs walked together until a flood created the canyons, mountains and Chixulub impact crater.
OK, rant over. So Dubya wants to go to the moon and Mars using current state of the art technology. I have good news and bad news. We used Newtonian physics and Greek geometry to measure their distance. We used this knowledge and telescopes to measure the parallax to the near stars. We used this knowledge to measure standard candles like Cepheid variables and went on to look at intrinsic brightness and redshift to measure the size and age of the universe. We found it to be 13 billion years old but we were wrong. Its only 6000 years old.
So, tracing the error back, we find that Mars is about 10 feet across and only 39 miles away from Earth. This is wonderful news! Instead of expensive spacecraft we should be able to reach it by hot air balloon. I picture NASA technicians building something out of Jules Vern, or maybe the third season of Lexx. Great vast balloons suspending a creaking wooden hulled vessel with spinning anemometers and brass valves hissing steam from the coal fired furnace. Ropes and lanyards and the Captainâ€™s wheelhouse. As they cautiously approach Mars our intrepid stratonauts prepare the harpoon for docking.
Now the bad news. A month ago I saw the Moon passing over my backyard towards the West. A couple of weeks ago it was gone! Thinking the worst I pulled out an atlas and did some calculations. You see, the Moon was only about 600 feet from the Earth, and the rocky mountains are much, much higher. I fear it was destroyed on impact.
“Proud to Be a Liberal Secular Humanist Soviet Canuckistani!”
87 - January 9th, 2007 at 2:52 pm - Alchemist Says:

Hey Peter, I’ve an idea. If you stand for Prez, I’ll stand for PM. If we get elected (if, ha, we’ll have FSM on our side!) we can cement the Anglo-American Special Relationship by liberating Belgium - home of Stella Artois and whoever brews Holstein Pils. I think we should leave the Islamic countries alone, not really known for their brewing experience.
.
Just heard that good old Tony Blair has announced that he wasn’t too happy with the way Saddam’s execution went. Hmm only took him a week and a half to make his mind up. Wasn’t it Dylan that sang about “blowing in the wind”?
88 - January 9th, 2007 at 3:03 pm - Kaptain Jimmy Says:

@Al Dente
Jan 9th, 2007 at 2:46 pm
“Great vast balloons suspending a creaking wooden hulled vessel with spinning anemometers and brass valves hissing steam from the coal fired furnace. Ropes and lanyards and the Captainâ€™s wheelhouse.”
Need a Kaptain mate?
89 - January 9th, 2007 at 3:07 pm - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA Says:

Ahem, If Al Dente needs a Captain, Kaptain, I think he knows where to come.
90 - January 9th, 2007 at 3:20 pm - Al Dente Says:

Aaargh, all welcome, except the orthodox Pastafarians. They wear two eyepatches and can’t see where they’re going!
“Proud to be a LSHSC!”
91 - January 9th, 2007 at 3:27 pm - Peter Popoff Says:

“They wear two eyepatches and canâ€™t see where theyâ€™re going!”
.
hahahaha Priceless!
92 - January 9th, 2007 at 3:34 pm - Mad Tom Rackham Says:

For all you would be pirates - http://www.piratequiz.com/
93 - January 9th, 2007 at 3:41 pm - Beastly Rich Says:

I have the awesome name of…
.
Red Roger Rackham

Passion is a big part of your life, which makes sense for a pirate. You have the good fortune of having a good name, since Rackham (pronounced RACKem, not rack-ham) is one of the coolest sounding surnames for a pirate. Arr!
RRR!!!
.
Yarrr! I be triple ARrrrrrr
94 - January 9th, 2007 at 3:46 pm - Peter Popoff Says:

Dirty Davy Rackham

You’re the pirate everyone else wants to throw in the ocean — not to get rid of you, you understand; just to get rid of the smell. You have the good fortune of having a good name, since Rackham (pronounced RACKem, not rack-ham) is one of the coolest sounding surnames for a pirate. Arr! .
.
Cool! I’ll stick with Peter Popoff though, it just sort of “pops”
95 - January 9th, 2007 at 3:52 pm - Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA Says:

Mad Tom Rackham,

My calculated pirate name is ‘Captain Tom Flint’ which as you can see is pretty to close to my real pirate name (Captain Noodulous Silicate).

Good site.
96 - January 9th, 2007 at 4:01 pm - Red Roger Rackham Says:

I like my new name!
.
Yarrrrr, sez I!
97 - January 9th, 2007 at 4:30 pm - Red Roger Rackham Says:

why are we all called Rackham? Which one of you is my dad?
98 - January 9th, 2007 at 4:31 pm - L'TUAE_42 Says:

According to the quiz, my name is “Dread Pirate Bonny”
S\/\/33t!
but should I use it or no?
99 - January 9th, 2007 at 4:34 pm - Red Roger Rackham Says:

I don’t know.
.
What does l’tuae mean?
100 - January 9th, 2007 at 4:36 pm - L'TUAE_42 Says:

it’s an acronym. Life, The Universe, And Everything is 42
you read hitchhikers?

Pages: « 1 2 3 4 [5] 6 7 8 9 … 13 » Show All

Purchase the Gospel

An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American