Get a bible…and read it throughly
Stop being stupid
God is our maker
leave that as it be, because it IS the truth
and to the comment above me, that was god hoping to help.
I feel for all of you who believe this idiotic belief.
and i hope you change sometime in your life so you can make it to heaven.
Get a bible and read it throughly
Published by Bobby Henderson December 28th, 2006 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 926 Comments
926 Responses to “Get a bible and read it throughly”
Peter “…Besides, she’s as twisted as we are.” You lucky, lucky, bastard – I’ve only ever met one woman as twisted as me. Unfortunately she was married and neither of us played that game. I think I nearly sent my ex round the bend – she had problems knowing when I was being serious or taking the p :) – I can be a little frustrating to say the least mwhahaha! What is a sociopath anyway? :)
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The site is slower than a politicians apology today. I’ll wager that there’s a cabal of christians (what is the group noun anyway – cabal?, covern?, murder? – no that’s crows) somewhere in Alabama rubbing their hands in glee – “we did that. Now do you believe in the power of prayer. Those earthquakes on the San Andreas fault? Us! – HAHAHA – cower mere mortals – for thou hast been judged and found wanting!”
Ho Hum – time for a beer run! Catch you in a bit.
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Wow, there have been alot of responses for me to catch up on since my last one. Let me start off by saying i am not easily offended and am not at all offended by people bashing Christianity on this site or anywhere else. I was just simply pointing out that alot of people automatically assume that faith equals incredible stupidity.
Secondly let me point out that when i said it was ok to make fun of TLM, i was not entirely serious. Ok actually i was serious but simply because he has displayed his ingnorance and immaturity time and time again on this site. Seriously anyone that brags about their grandparents heated pool in an attempt to make someone jealous at the very least needs to be made fun of, if not have some reality slapped into them.
Let me also address the statement i made about believing in parts of the bible. Someone stated that it was stupid to believe in parts and not the whole thing. I believe like many people that it is entirely likely that parts of the bible may have been lost in translation, or added or omited by the church at some point in history. Therefore, i do not blindly believe everything in the bible. Basically, at some point in my life my faith was shaken, and while i am fully willing to admit that religion has flaws and contradictions, i am not ready to fully lose my faith.
So to sum up, my problem is not with people thinking religion is stupid, my problem is when people automatically assume faith equals some form of mental retardation. Anyway, i just wanted to clarify so i don’t come off as looking whiny or bitchy. Later fellas
Dr. Worm
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Booty. How are you getting on with “The God Delusion”? I’ve got a couple of books on the go at the mo. so only got to the first chapter. The start of the first chapter – Deserved Respect – “The boy lay prone in the grass…” – is it just me or did anyone else go into the limerick “the boy stood on the burning deck, his pockets full of crackers. One fell down his trouser leg, and blew off both his knackers”?
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It’s just you. I’ve read about half that book, I read it in bits. Dawkins goes on a lot of tangents that more often than not come back to the point eventually.
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Alchemist,
I’ve been away for a day and missed loads of posts and visitors.
Those little bubbles of Stella needed saving and somebody had to do it. ;)
What have I missed?
I wish there was a way of leafing through all posts since date X.
Perhaps if we get Daniel to pray for some better search tools on the site we will be rewarded…
I’ve downloaded a web-crawler but it’ll be the weekend before I fire it up.
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I’m up to page 125 – the worship of gaps – so far I am very hooked and thoroughly enjoying it – I am just giving my bum a change of scenery before taking it to bed (I love reading in bed – it’s my third favourite thing to do in bed – just like smiling is the second best thing you can do with your mouth ;) )
I am driving my husband mad I think by getting more “evangelical” every day!
I have read him a load of the quotes about Douglas Adams though (we are both HUGE fans of his – which is how we met, so they are very emotionally charged for me)
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smiling is the third best thing you can do with your mouth.
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Hi Dr. Worm, great post.
I’d like to address some of your points.
I was just simply pointing out that alot of people automatically assume that faith equals incredible stupidity.
Basically yes, if you operate on some formal sort of faith that’s pretty dumb because its irrational. There’s lots of examples of ‘apparently’ intelligent people doing stupid things so the fact that you’re obviously relatively bright doesn’t prove you aren’t flawed in any way.
Cut out the faith and see how you feel. Most people feel GREAT! It’s like nicotine addiction. Addicts (and I was one once) go on and on about how they enjoy it, how it defines them, how it helps them through the day etc. but they are all chemically addicted to nicotine and all those claims are the addiction talking.
Many nicotine addicts are also ‘apparently’ intelligent people and they can’t see the truth either.
So don’t think of religion as necessarily a mental retardation but in some people mental aberration.
On the subject of the TLM, I’ve been ignoring him for a couple of weeks now and like the nicotine I don’t look back.
He is only 17 and has a shed load of growing up to do. I hope he does and his personality comes together but frankly I think the best thing for us to do is ignore.
However given that he is 17 he’s a big enough boy to take a bit of stick. I don’t find it offensive that people give him the odd swipe. He can get right on yer tits.
I don’t think its fair to have a go at you for selective belief. Actually that puts you a step above the fundies.
My question is how you decide which bits you believe and which you don’t?
In terms of moral guidance most people don’t need the bible and since there’s some crazy shit in there if you give me someone who needs it they are exactly the people it isn’t safe to expose to it!
So the Bible is worthless or dangerous depending on who you are. It isn’t good for anyone. It can’t help the good and may mislead the bad.
The so called 10 commandments are a prime example of advice that is either useless or harmful but not actually ever any use.
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Booty:
I have read him a load of the quotes about Douglas Adams though (we are both HUGE fans of his – which is how we met
You met when a star ship with improbability drive you were on saved him from certain death in the vacuum of space!
Cool.
We don’t need a piddly pirate ship we got our selves a space ship.
RAmen
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“Dr.Worm Jan 11th, 2007 at 1:29 p
Let me also address the statement i made about believing in parts of the bible. Someone stated that it was stupid to believe in parts and not the whole thing. I believe like many people that it is entirely likely that parts of the bible may have been lost in translation, or added or omited by the church at some point in history. Therefore, i do not blindly believe everything in the bible.”
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I was the one who made that comment, and I stick by it!
What you just said there, is why the word Hypocrisy is used so much when talking about Christians.
You can’t rewrite a book to your likings, as the Christians have done since the beginning.
I don’t like green eggs and ham, Maybe Dr Seuss should rewrite that book to, I really don’t like green eggs and ham unless they are microwaved.
It just doesn’t work that way, in the real world!
A good Christian stands by his book, and doesn’t rewrite it to suit themselves.
To confusing? Not to the guys that wrote the dang thing!
I guess that’s why there are so few “good christians in this world.
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Third best Beastly Rich? Do share!
@Dr Worm and Alchemist – I am recently “converted” to atheism and I have to say that when you look back at all the stuff you get told in Christianity it only makes sense when you look at it as a tribal history of primitive people trying to make sense of a scary world and of their leaders teaching them a load of stuff to make them do as they were told.
I agree wholeheartedly that as a set of moral values it is hugely flawed and it has no place in showing us how to lead our lives today that sensible people can’t work out for themselves anyway.
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Beastly Rich Jan 11th, 2007 at 1:43 pm
“It’s just you.”
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Yeah. I suspected as much :)
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I’ve always had a bit of a problem with Dawkins, not sure exactly why. I’ll stick with it though. It’s got a quote from Matt Ridley on the back, so can’t be bad.
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Captain. We do our best :) I’ve just managed to liberate 8 of “La Grande Biere” from the local beer slaver. I’ll do my best to reintroduce them into the wild tonight. “Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more….”
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LOL Captain – not quite, I think a pub and lots of beer were involved somewhere, but the details are a little hazy! Then again I certainly had a bad headache several times so maybe I was spacesick!
I still laugh at Oolon Colluphids blockbusting trilogy “Where God Went Wrong” “Some More Of God’s Greatest Mistakes” and “Who Is This God Person Anyway?”
Douglas was a sad loss :(
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There are lots of Fuckery bugs in the system tonight! I have ended up taking my laptop and my book to bed cos comments are taking so long to load – and then the page crashes!
Still, this is the life! All I need now is a nice tankard of something….
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Booty, I’m just old enough to remember the radio series first time round.
I have it on CD.
I like the bit “There is a theory that if anyone works out what the universe if for and why we are here then it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarrely inexplicable. There is another theory that this has already happened….”
I’m certain that he was a Pastafarian at heart.
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“Third best Beastly Rich? Do share!”
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1. Oral Sex
2. Kissing
3. Smiling
4. Eating Spaghetti
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I liberating a beer (via my kidneys) right now. It’s a new product from carlsberg, but it’s not shit lager! It’s a cloudy and flinty wheat beer.
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Nice bottle too!
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I thought it might be kissing!
What’s the carlsberg called?
Captain – I missed the radio but got hooked by the TV series and then the books – my hubby was hooked instantly by the radio as well (he’s 9 years older than me and had a great time telling his work mates he was dating a nurse 9 years younger than him!)
I am sure Douglas would have loved the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster :)
I don’t suppose you would like to join our fan club would you? ;)
We are called ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha – our website is an embarrassment at the moment, but we are working on it! It has been going for about 25 years!
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Booty Jan 11th, 2007 at 2:34 pm
“I am recently “converted†to atheism…”
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I’ve been in rehab. for a while now but like the nicotine addiction Captain spoke of, you never really get over it! Guilt is always a biggie!
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I recognise Dr. Worms position. It was one I took myself. The Bible conflicts with our knowledge of the “real world”.So you interpret it – no matter what anyone says, that’s what happens.
You read days as “a period of time”, substitute dinosaurs for the Nephilim. Argue that the 144 000 to receive the seal of God are only from the twelve tribes of Israel – ie Jewish, there can be as many “saints” as you want.
Quite simply, you make it fit your own views. Women preachers? Well, that was then. It’s different today.
Slowly you realise that you are making excuses for a book that, really, you don’t believe.
Epiphany!
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It’s no wonder that some people on this site get annoyed. It’s so very frustrating when you realise you have been made a fool of. That you have believed a lie!
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Ahhhhh good ‘ol Sector ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha Sweet ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha.
I always think its daft in Star Trek that Earth is in Sector zero-zero-one when it was the Vulcans who went interstellar first.
Is anyone interested in going for a drink on Wednesday 17th January in central London?
Some sad nerds who may be friends of Booty appear to be going for a drink….
Alchemist where are you geographically speaking?
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http://info.carlsberg.com/Info/frameset.htm?pUrl=%2FInfo%2FMedia%2FNews%2FPress%2BReleases%2F2005%2FFacts%2Babout%2Bthe%2Bfour%2BJacobsen%2Bbeer%2Ehtm
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I didn’t know there were 4 kinds! The one I’m drinking is the jacobsen bramley wit. It’s expensive but comes in a 75cl bottle (the same size as a wine bottle). It’s great you pour out a pint and there is still plenty left!
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Alchemist, you are so right. You cannot “cherry pick” the things that make sense from all of the nonsense in the Bible and try to make that the basis of your belief system. It is either true or not true.
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I also enjoyed every word of Douglas Adams’ books. I loved the TV series, too.
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Argh!
There will indeed be a lot of my friends there! And yes, they are all nerds!
We are in Nottingham now, so I can’t go, but if you are ever in the midlands let me know and I will be more than happy to share some pasta and grog :)
In the “real world” I am known as Abigail, so please feel free to talk about me and let them embarrass the hell out of me!
Oh, and a lot of them are very weird and I take no responsibility – they were weird before I met them!
Yay! Another Douglas lover! (In a purely platonic way!)
Did any of you see the film?
There were good bits and bad bits!
Anyway, I am supposed to be reading a book- it has got a bit heavy, or maybe I am just tired.
Catch you later.
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Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA Jan 11th, 2007 at 3:14 pm
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OOp North Captain. Where the Ducks play football (flit between Yorks and Lancs). I’d be game for a few brews sometime though. As long as there’s a train station and a TraveLodge. Weekend’s best for me though. I don’t have a set schedule but would probably want to make a session out of it :) Probably? hahaha
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I think its unfair to forbid cherry picking, but observe that it’s pointless.
Admit to yourself that you’ve come to your own conclusions and are now ‘finding’ them in the Bible.
What not stand up for what you believe and stop using the Bible as some sort of prop.
You’re so much more free and strong without religion fucking you around.
We the adult population if Earth are responsible for our condition and should look to ourselves and each other for solutions.
It is unconstructive to start queering the most important things we do in the world with poppycock nonsense from a book.
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I’d love to come but I’m in cornwall.
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Oh Booty. Another Adams fan for your collection :) I’ve got the radio series on MP3 (CD) somewhere. I’m a bit of a freak for books. Somehow TV serialisations never do justice to the twisted worlds my fertile little mind has created :)
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How many of us are north of Watford?
Could we arrange a halfway house meeting point?
Once I have got to know people a little better we have plenty of crash space, or a big garden in the summer ;)
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Yay Alchemist! I will soon have my own FSM/Hitch-hikers convention!
*does a happy dance*
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I am probably way EAST of Watford. :-)
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I’m south of Watford. I’m south of London even.
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I have to shut the laptop down – my husband wants his half of the bed back!
Catch you all tomorrow :)
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Hi guys :)
Another Adams fan. Speaking of the “Guide, the ABC (national broadcaster in Aus.)
Usually repeat the radio show over its summer season here. Just checked their programming schedule and can’t see it. :(
I read it many years ago, as well as some others (which I still have in storage somewhere!) that I don’t even recall the titles of!
@Booty Jan 11th, 2007 at 3:36 pm
“How many of us are north of Watford?”
I’m a little south of there I’m afraid :(
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Nikkiee,
Looks like Booty and Alchemist may be able to meet up, but the rest of us are at the four corners of the Globe.
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I used to live near watford.
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I’ll come to watford.
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Re-Oared Marc Jan 11th, 2007 at 3:42 pm
I am probably way EAST of Watford. :-)
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hahahaha.
I say we hire Fiji for a week :)
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To the UK lot. It’s worth thinking about though (not Fiji more the pity). We could think of somewhere pretty central for us. Hell, Treckers have conventions why can’t we? (I’m not wearing pointy ears for anyone!). It might not be grand, in fact it should be as cheap as humanly possible, we’ll need grog money. I don’t see any reason why we shouldn’t hire somewhere for a week-end if there’s enough interest. A Uni. during the hols. might be an idea?
How many people do you think would be interested? I don’t mind organising it if there’s a demand.
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me.
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I’d love to meet up. It’s quite clear we (as a group) have got a lot in common.
A love of Douglas Adams, beer and hatred of religion have mileage.
And I agree there is no fucking way I’m going boozing with someone in pointy ears.
Piratical attire may be a different matter.
My problem with buggering off for a weekend is family as I can’t bring ‘em for a massive piss-up and lets face it that’s what we’re talking about.
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@Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA Jan 11th, 2007 at 4:09 pm
“Looks like Booty and Alchemist may be able to meet ..”
Oh, I can just imagine that!
No doubt there will be others around to retrieve them both from under the table though.
:)
Look out Watford.
RAmen
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That’s two of us Beastly :) I’m sure we could get a few people interested. Oh shit, I’m getting into one of my “good idea” modes. Seriously though, it could be done. It’ll take a few months to organise. I’ll see what the initial reactions are from the folks on site. If positive I’ll open an e-mail address for interested parties and take it from there. Could probably use some help though.
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Goodness me, I forget to check a thread for a couple days and miss all these posts!
“Yes welcome Blue, I can’t help but wonder though?
You say you know that god didn’t create the universe, but you choose to believe he did?
I’m just a little confused by your statement there?”
Well Peter, I speak as a person who is taking 9th grade biology, and I have yet to see any science prove or disprove the existence of God. If I could have worded my first post a little better, I would have tried to say that, but at the time the right words eluded me.
I know the Earth revolves around the Sun, and the Moon around the Earth; that can be proven with observation of the skies above us. Da Vinci thought his flying machines could work until he tried them out and observed them. I believe in God because, at least for right now, God cannot be observed and dis-proven.
However, that is what I believe right now. I also believed that Pluto was a planet, but was recently proven wrong.
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Cap. Good point. The silly idea that was starting to form included guest speakers. Admittedly lots of beer. Anything organised would have to take into account peoples home circumstances i.e come for a day, part of a day etc.
It could be a nightmare to organise but I’d quite like to meet the other Godless ones. Way and a will etc.
Outer London, Home Counties, Midlands, Leeds or Manchester would provide most venues that are affordable. Central London is just too expensive.
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It’s worth thinking about. If anyone has any ideas my safety e-mail is
baccahnaliandelight@yahoo.com
Hehehe – Maybe The Biochemical Society will hire us a room. hahahaha
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“No doubt there will be others around to retrieve them both from under the table though.
:) ”
Thanks Nickkkieey {sulk}
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@ BlueDreamer
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I believe in God because, at least for right now, God cannot be observed and dis-proven.
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Pretty soon you will be hit by Russell’s teapot. Wear a helmet :)
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Will do.
I’m really open to new ideas, but everything must be explained in what my friends call “Stupid People Language.” Will Russell throw the teapot slowly, so I can understand it? I’m sorry, I’m having a really silly day. XP
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@BlueDreamer
“God cannot be observed and dis-proven.”
Right! His Noodlyness cannot be observed and disproven.
RAmen
How old is the earth Blue Dreamer?
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Hey BlueDreamer, don’t worry about it. Every day is a silly one for me. I just pretend to be serious occasionally so that my friends don’t call the authorities :)
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Russell’s teapot is best explained by the phrase “prove it isn’t there”. There is a teapot orbiting the sun (I think). You can’t see it, we don’t have equipment available to detect it yet. But I say it is there! Prove me wrong.
It’s an attempt to show how foolish our belief in an invisible entity is. It’s based on the “appeal to ignorance” – you can’t prove the teapot doesn’t exist. Therefore it does!
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@Nikky
Um…….3 million years? 3.5 million? I skipped Physical Science in High School, but I know that the Earth is at least older than my Dad………Again, I am having a very silly day. Being on Winter Break makes my brain feel like mush. :)
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@Alchemist
Dude (I hope you don’t mind, and I’ll apologize if you do) you are awesome! I’ve been walking around my whole life and have yet to meet a person that agrees with me! (And I know that there are many, many people who would approve of the Teapot……..I just haven’t met any of them in person. Still, that does not prove they don’t exist!)
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I think that teapot has hit way to many people. Hey! Mabye that’s why they all believe in the invisible entity! They were just hit on the head.
I have to say I’m feeling quite left out here. What about all the poor souls over here in the states? We should arange a float by of ships in the middle of the Atlantic, just to make things fair.
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BlueDreamer. I just read your reply on “Religion, positive overall”. You quote the first part of my reply to the question and agree with it.
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I’m trying here. The part you quoted was about the distinction between religion and faith. Please understand that I abhor the idea of Intelligent Design.
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Scroll up on this thread to my first sensible comment
Alchemist Jan 10th, 2007 at 5:56 am
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