Excellent satire of the criticisms of religion and Intelligent Design … unless you guys actually think the creation of the FSM and its subsequent religion is a valid critique of religion and Intelligent Design in the form of satire or actual truth for that matter. In that case, try studying and understanding your “opponents†first before attacking. Or maybe this “religion†of the FSM is just a good case of showing that people will believe almost anything (assuming that your church members ACTUALLY believe the FSM to be true). Yet, I very highly doubt that people are QUITE that stupid. Given enough time, they should be eliminated by natural selection anyway.
However, both ways I do enjoy and appreciate the artistic work and creativity you have put into the FSM and its subsequent church. It, as well as the hate mail you receive, is truly hilarious.
It’s a good thing that artistic method isn’t restrained by the scientific method. The religion of the FSM is evidence that art is not restrained by logic.
As an aside, since art is allowed to be taught in school in the form of an art class, the religion of the FSM should be allowed in school as well. Drop me a line if you need help creating a case (I wish I were a lawyer).
Similarly, religion or philosophy would also be considered art if it did not attempt to validly explain the existence of good and evil, reason, and other enigmas of the “human condition.†Art attempts to depict; religion, science, and philosophy attempt to explain in a valid manner.
Nevertheless, I can see how the religion of the FSM could attempt to explore the very concept of validity and its relation to truth. However, in this case, it should also attempt to be more valid itself and satirically examine or disprove science as well in order to be more encompassing and relative in addressing validity, in my humble opinion.
Or the creation of FSM and its religion may be just a load of quasi-artistic BS, in accordance with all gods written in history who were included within and were a part of the universe and describable as natural objects. re: ra (sun-god), poseidon (god of the sea), fsm (flying chunk of spaghetti and meatballs) “may his appendages be honoredâ€
Regardless of the psychology or validity behind the FSM, thank you for the humor, and good luck in continuing to intelligently or not so intelligently (whichever the case may be) evolve the FSM and its religion.
May your God given or unguided evolutionary given ability for creativity and the FSM’s noodly appendage guide you in your never ending search for that natural-selection-created concept of Truth.
CJYman http://cjyman.blogspot.com
I leave with you these three quotes:
“If the whole universe has no meaning, we should never have found out that it has no meaning: just as, if there were no light in the universe and therefore no creatures with eyes, we should never know it was dark. Dark would be without meaning.”
–C. S. Lewis
“If the solar system was brought about by an accidental collision, then the appearance of organic life on this planet was also an accident, and the whole evolution of Man was an accident too. If so, then all our present thoughts are mere accidents – the accidental by-product of the movement of atoms. And this holds for the thoughts of the materialists and astronomers as well as for anyone else’s. But if their thoughts – i.e., of Materialism and Astronomy – are merely accidental by-products, why should we believe them to be true? I see no reason for believing that one accident should be able to give me a correct account of all the other accidents. It’s like expecting that the accidental shape taken by the splash when you upset a milk-jug should give you a correct account of how the jug was made and why it was upset.”
–C. S. Lewis
“The most incomprehensible thing about the universe is that it is comprehensible.â€
–Albert Einstein
Erm.
I am a bit confused.
Can you please rewrite it in more comprehensible English – it is early Sunday morning here and my poor brain is a little befuddled (not enough grog last night). YOu seem to be putting forward several opposing ideas at the same time.
Please excuse me if I disappear shortly – we have an appointment with Santa on a steam train :)
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I thought maybe it was just me Booty. I decided to come back and read it later to see what I wasn’t getting from the post. (was just reading TLM again, you understand) So I’m glad you posted. Still think I will read it again….very slowly…. later.
RAmen
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The initial point appears to be:
If CoFSM is a parody of satirical religions then it is funny.
If it is an attempt to parody religion itself OR intended as actual fact, then it isn’t funny.
I haven’t been through the middle bit in detail, but I think the author likes some of the artwork.
The quotations appear to demonstrate an established fact: C.S.Lewis was a bell-end.
There’s also one from Einstein which doesn’t seem relevant, but here’s an alternative:
The most comprehensible thing about the “excelent satire … unless” e-mail is that it is incomprehensible.
- Oscar Wilde
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I think he’s saying that we, having fun with the idea of the FSM (sauce be with him), might be creating Art here. I don’t have a problem with that.
I saw a pile of bricks in the Tate Modern gallery (London), and it looked like Art to me: context is crucial, and our context is the religiously-inspired lunacy of the world today. Looking at it like that, not only is this Art, it is Culture too, especially if the Parmesan is left out in the sun too long.
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@Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA
Well done Captain, now what about this bit:
‘Nevertheless, I can see how the religion of the FSM could attempt to explore the very concept of validity and its relation to truth. However, in this case, it should also attempt to be more valid itself and satirically examine or disprove science as well in order to be more encompassing and relative in addressing validity, in my humble opinion.’
??
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‘it should also attempt to be more valid itself and satirically examine or disprove science as well in order to be more encompassing and relative in addressing validity’
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Yep that is definately what is bothering me
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Nikkiee,
The author thinks that CoFSM could be used as device in some exploration of
validity [I suspect of argument and belief] and its relation to [I guess ontological] truth.
This part accords with the purpose of this site, Bobby Henderson wrote the letter because of [in essence] his concerns about flagrant disregard for these matters by people responsible for knowing better.
So the author is in communion with us on this point – RAmen, He has been touched by the noodly appendage.
The second part suggests that we ought to give science a bit more stick.
The author should pay more attention to their gospel [oFSM].
Bobby Henderson spends almost as much time satirising science as religion.
CoFSM is described as the only major religion supported by hard science.
RAmen.
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‘a load of quasi-artistic BS, in accordance with all gods written in history who were included within and were a part of the universe and describable as natural objects. re: ra (sun-god), poseidon (god of the sea), fsm (flying chunk of spaghetti and meatballs)’
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Gods represented by tangible natural entities are ‘quasi-artistic BS’ therefore I’m assuming whathisname poster is implying that the invisible supernatural being gods are not ‘quasi-artistic BS’
I’m still picking up xtian quasi-intellectual BS
Oh well, it’s been a long day and I’ve been out in the sun this afternoon. I’ll read it tomorrow when my brain is a bit fresher.
RAmen
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I like the last bit of the C.S. Lewis quote:
It’s like expecting that the accidental shape taken by the splash when you upset a milk-jug should give you a correct account of how the jug was made and why it was upset
Modern forensic method is based on the principle that a great deal can be determined from split milk about how that milk got spilt.
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Yes. The information given by the pattern splashes of that milk, along with other forensic evidence, is usually enough to put the person who upset the milk jug (or cow) away for a very long time.
RAmen
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It might be that it’s sunday morning, but it seems to me that this person isn’t really saying anything in 676 words.
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OK CJYman http://cjyman.blogspot.com
The only hits I get on cjyman.blogspot.com, takes me to an ID site (Intelligent Reasoning) which appears to have an open forum for ID debate. Must bookmark it and have a closer look tomorrow.
http://intelligentreasoning.blogspot.com/2006/12/note-to-zachriel.html
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OK CJYman cjyman.blogspot.com
The only hits I get on cjyman.blogspot.com, takes me to an ID site (Intelligent Reasoning) which appears to have an open forum for ID debate. Must bookmark it and have a closer look tomorrow.
http://intelligentreasoning.blogspot.com/2006/12/note-to-zachriel
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That link doesn’t work…. so
http://intelligentreasoning.blogspot.com/2006/12/note-to-zachriel.html
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Kick, I couldn’t get your link to work.
I got something at:
http://cjyman.blogspot.com
as provided. I get a site titled ‘Reality Cheque’
I’ve only read the first paragraph and already get a bad feeling:
Information has only ever been seen to be the result of a mind and has never been seen and actually does not make any logical sense to be a result of any process (especially natural laws) other than that — purposeful process — produced by mind. In fact, one of the defining points of mind is that it produces information.
That author appears to be confusing information with knowledge.
The second paragraph goes further off the same beam:
Information = a seemingly random, yet also non-repetitive arrangement of units, in which the specific arrangement, not defined by natural laws of attraction, produces specific function. In other words, the sequence and therefore the function is not described by the physical properties of the units. The reason this arrangement is not random is because it must also conform to an independently given pattern, the pattern (similar to a password) being that which unlocks the function.
It gets worse. It gets worse…take a look.
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Here we go sorry about the others. I had to search the above address to get this one?
http://cjyman.blogspot.com/index.html
About Me: CJYman
‘I am a Christian and I believe that the universe and life was designed on purpose, with a purpose, and for a purpose. I believe that objective truth and reality do exist and can be discovered through reasoning. Regarding evolution, complete evolution by RANDOM mutations and natural selection is unscientific as well as incorrect.’
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CJYman must post on intelligent reasoning as well. We haven’t had an intellectual IDiot for a while.
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Interestingly, he describes himself as a realist…
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Yet, on the same page, he refuses to accept the fact that evolution is science. Curiouser and curiouser…
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Oh dear Jingles, I’ve just been reading some to-ing and fro-ing on the intelligent reasoning blogspot debate. Broard ID claims, no backup and just ignore everything the other guy was patiently trying to explain. The idiot in there was Joe.G and this was the first page my search for CJYman took me to. I felt like I was reading all of leucines vague, broard inuendo posts all over again.
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There’s some really half-baked semi-science in there.
THe page I looked at was arguing that something called GM+NS (Guided Mutation feeding in to Natural Selection] was a more plausible theory than RM+NS [Random Mutation feeding in to Natural Selection].
Can anyone tell me what the abbreviations CSI and IC mean in the following:
The account of RM + NS (random mutations + natural selection) is at the very least, not as scientifically rigorous as GM + NS. ID (as a guided process) is the result of an inference to the best explanation, which is a scientific approach based on the fact that every time a highly improbable event appears which shows the presence of CSI or IC, as scientifically defined and quantified, we have always seen it to be the result of ID. At least ID does have a rigorous scientific filter.
Now, I’d like to pose another question. What if we are to place the same strict rules on RM + NS that we place on GM + NS? What scientific filter is used to separate an occurrence that is the result of natural laws from one that is the result of random chance occurrences?
I think the last paragraph is where the author is starting to do damage with their confusion between information and knowledge in the two opening paragraphs.
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His post was diffcult to follow, but not impossible. Much like me.
It woudl apear he almost gets it, but would liek ti spelled out just to be sure. I personally hate having to explain art . . or jokes.
Note to orriginal poster–FSM is just as valid as ID. There’s your bottom line.
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His post was difficult to follow, but not impossible. Much like me.
It would appear he almost gets it, but would like it spelled out just to be sure. I personally hate having to explain art . . or jokes.
Note to original poster–FSM is just as valid as ID. There’s your bottom line.
(sorry about the spelling on the first post)
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Lee,
We’ve had this out before. UD (Unintelligent Design) is MORE valid than ID.
The ID lot aren’t able or at least prepared to explain all the faillings of the aledged design.
I sincerely suspect that they have a particular agent in mind for the ‘intelligent designer’ though they are mostly careful not to let their guard down and name the agent.
Consequently they are reluctant to accept the ‘intelligent’ designer is flawed, unkind occasionally drunk a dumb ass etc. to explain the ‘flaws’ we can all see in the design.
The principle of Unintelligent Design (UD) is far better placed to explain the world around us than ID will ever be.
FSMism is also more intellectually honest than ID because it names the UD agent – the FSM himself.
ID is just ‘warmed over creationism’ where as UD is warmed over FSMism which is warmed over bolognese – as much tastier proposition any day of the week.
Yum. Yum. And RAmen.
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Cap.
.
“the presence of Complex Specified Information (CSI), or the presence of an Irreducibly Complex (IC) system.”
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Para. 9 on his December 13 “My view of ID in a nutshell”.
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Haven’t got any further, my teeth are starting to ache.
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“Art attempts to depict; religion, science, and philosophy attempt to explain in a valid manner.”
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Religion attempts to explain in a valid manner how the world works based on FAITH. Without faith it is merely fiction. Science works with ideas, theories, and evidence. So, I guess validity is in the eye of the beholder. This is sort of like last week at the Pentagon when Vice Pres Cheney praised outgoing Sec of Defense Rumsfeld as the best Sec of Defense in the nation’s history. Was this valid reasoning or was he appealing to the world’s faith that what he said was true? If it was true, then why did the President just fire the best Sec of Defense in history at the height of a war? Certainly the evidence says something different.
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“it should also attempt to be more valid itself and satirically examine or disprove science as well in order to be more encompassing and relative in addressing validity”
.
Oh dear. Satire cannot disprove science. According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary:
” satire. 1 : a literary work holding up human vices and follies to ridicule or scorn
2 : trenchant wit, irony, or sarcasm used to expose and discredit vice or folly”
No mention there of scientific tests. Lots about mocking and ridiculing idiocy, though. Again, validity is in the eye of the beholder. FSM exists because it ridicules false validity (IE Rumsfeld is a genius; God Did It). Your statement is word salad. It was composed to sound big and smart but it just shows you to be Yet Another Creationist Trying To Show Idiotic Notions As Valid Argument (YACTTSINAVA).
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The guy’s just trying to sound smart and condescending, without having any idea what he’s talking about. Which is absolutely nothing, his email makes no sense. I propose Wernicke’s aphasia.
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I find posts like this one very strange and I’ve seen a lot of them. They combine a large but inappropriate vocabulary, with an inexplicable lack of understanding, and quotes from conservative political and religious sources. Where do they get this? Who are their role models?
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@Peter:
Yes, this is just what I’m talking about. It’s as if they think that using big words makes them smarter than everyone else. Maybe you’re right: it’s just that they are dumb and think they are intellectually superior. There certainly seems to be a lot of them though.
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I struggled thorugh the first part of his post then after reading his C.S. Lewis quotes at the end realised that he was actually against The Theory of Evolution and that the first part was mainly pseudo-intellectual BS written in an attempt to give legitimacy to his real agenda, i.e. ID.
RAmen
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True, I think this is an idiot trying to look smart by using too many words. As we all know there is nothing stupider than a stupid man trying to be clever.
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*cough*TLG*cough*dr.martin*cough*
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If it wasn’t for some of our US cousins having it rammed down their throat, I’d think the ID crowd quite funny.
It appears they’ve studied the ‘God of gaps problem’ and devised ID to create a permanent God shaped gap for God to reside in.
That could be quite sweet. The funny part is they still keep having to concede bits of the gap.
The link in the post above withdraws from direct Intelligent Design and retreats to Guided Mutation. It’s “OK, OK so we accept natural selection, but the designer is guiding it…â€.
Their mistake (as believers) is that when they create a pseudo scientific theory (ID) with a vacuum in the middle everyone will instinctively pour God in to it.
We know once they’ve accepted NS and mutation we can safely remove the designer and still get the outcome we see today. So in the absence of actual evidence of any kind, this designer party is surplus to requirements. Vip. Another little gap tidied up.
RAmen
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Peter, You’re probably right there. Maybe my English just isn’t as good as I thought, but I found it very difficult to understand.
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@Alchemist Dec 17th, 2006 at 10:19 am
“the presence of Complex Specified Information (CSI), or the presence of an Irreducibly Complex (IC) system.â€
.
Thought they might be made up IDiot terms that no one else in the respectable science world uses.
The IDiots are still trying to make out ID as a big debate, even though their “theory”(fantasy) has been shot down on numerous occassions by professionals everywhere, at every turn . The rest of science knows these pseudp-scientists have presented no debate, just fanciful ideas.
Obviously, this ‘intelligent reasonong’ site has been set up th continue this charade of the ‘BIG debate’. It strikes me that is the reason for JCYman’s rather ‘unguided’ and ‘unspecified’ communication with the CoFSM. They are desperately looking for people to go to these blogs and argue with them. That, also would allow them to find out more about the all gaps in ID (well..the one big gap, that is ID) and well as plagiarise some info from the posters, with which to fill them. Just modify it, so everything falls to the designer. Another thing I’ve always noticed about the IDiots, is they thrive on trying to get by on vaqueness in their assertions. If JCYman wants to present an ID debate, let him bring it here, I say. While there is no question that ID is a farce, the IDiots can still be fun to play with sometimes.
RAmen
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@Oared Shitless Marc
RAmen
@Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA Dec 17th, 2006 at 2:16 pm
RAmen
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@Nikkiee. Too right. The phrase “Bullshit Baffles” comes to mind.
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BTW that laughingboy on the run thread. I think you do right in not biting again. He’s got problems. I remember when I was 17, I was never in the house. OK I might have got better A levels if I had been but I had a hell of a good time. I suspect he’s extremely lonely and envious of us.
.
RAmen
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I do feel for teenagers these days, looking back, I think things were maybe, just a little simpler and more clear cut when I was that age. Mind you, within ourselves, the teens are never a stable age. Too many hormones and peer pressure. I hope he does grow out of that attitude, otherwise he is going to be a very lonely young man indeed!
RAmen
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True Nikkiee. The threat of nuclear annihilation did that. I suspect he knows more than you and I put together, how can we argue with an intellect so perfect.
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@CJYman
I visited your blog spot and read many of your quotes. One of them right at the top of the page was “Test all things; hold fast that which is good”. If you truely agree with this statement then you should be able to supply some experimental evidence of ID and not nebulous and verbose philosophical arguments. Anybody can quote people who support their position. For example, “Nothing in biology makes sense except in the light of evolution” (Theodosius Dobzhansky). However, quotes do not constitute evidence for your position, unless you are trying to prove that someone agrees with you.
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Ah, how often have we seen the same faulty logic from the ID brigade (see the 2nd quote from C.S.Lewis)? Usually it happens when they use the words ‘meaning’ or ‘purpose’ in their arguments .. this time it’s the term ‘accident’.
-
. Look .. ‘accident’ means something happening that wasn’t intended. It is NOT a synonym for ‘chance’. Matter moves throughout the universe. Sometimes sufficient matter accretes in a gravitationally bound system to form stars and planets. Sometimes entire galaxies collide. This is neither ‘accident, nor its antonym ‘intended’.
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Think of it this way. I’m blindfolded, with pockets full of small pebbles, and I’m tossing them randomly in all directions. One of my pebbles lands in a bucket of water some yards away. I didn’t know there was a bucket there. Hitting it can’t be described as an ‘accident’ .. it was sheer ‘chance’.
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Now consider the same initial conditions (blindfold and pebbles), but this time I know there’s a bucket within throwing distance and I know roughly where it is. My intention is NOT to hit the bucket. So I aim in a direction I think is away from the bucket. But I’m mistaken, or I’m crap at throwing, or I move, or a pebble ricochets off of a rock .. bottom line is that I eventually hit the bucket. That is an ‘accident’. It was not what I intended.
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This would all be pretty dull semantics, except that Mr Lewis then builds an entire line of (faulty) reasoning on this incorrect choice of words. Back to my bucket analogy ..
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My pebble causes ripples in the water in the bucket. However, it makes no sense to describe the ripples as either chance or accidental. Causing them was, but the ripples themselves aren’t. The way they spread out, interfere with the walls of the bucket and with each other, respond to surface tension and gravity are naturalistic. It may be impossible to exactly replicate the wave patterns, but they can’t be said to be ‘accidental’.
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It’s the same with thought. Of course, there are degrees of chance involved with thinking, from the quantum mechanical level upwards. And the ability to think in the first place may be the result of countless chance occurrences in the past. All these chances are the pebble and its trajectory towards the bucket. Plop! Hooray, I can think. I am sentient. But my thoughts are the ripples. My ripples may be bound by the walls of the bucket and my ideas may be predictable and unoriginal. But once in a while someone, like Einstein, can think outside of the bucket.
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Yarr.
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RAmen Coleoptera
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@moochie
Look .. ‘accident’ means something happening that wasn’t intended. It is NOT a synonym for ‘chance’.
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Spot on.
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@moochie
Yes
RAmen
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My old post got choked up with a bunch of nonsense… it got too hard to open and scroll down. So I’ll just make this post my new home. I don’t think the maker of this post will mind… whoever he or she is they seem to run the same line as the Rain Man. Anyways… Whenever I read my old post… all I see is instance after instance of you people going “name calling is pathetic”… while then why was I called a twat, an idiot, a Christian, and all those other things? Seems like you people like being a bit hypocritical. And as for Nikkiee, thanks for the “this is my last post to you” comment… I feel honoured that I won’t have to listen to your mind numbing ramblings about nothing anymore. I esspecially enjoyed the Me: “Wench Nikkiee wrote like 500 out of the 1000 posts” Wench Nikkiee: “You took time to go through and count them all? STALKER!” That cracks me up… maybe you should pay more attention in school when it comes to reading comprehension. And as for the rest of you… you really do need to grow up. Yes I’m 17, yes I name call (but only after you people initiated it), and yes I am smarter than all you lemmings. Lemmings is an appropraite analogy seeing as how Bobby seems to be the leader of you guys, and you’ve already followed him right over the edge of Sanity. Every time I read a post that says “I pity you TLM” I laugh. You people are in dire need of lots and lots of Therapy.
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I don’t think that mutations selected for, through natural selection, can be attributed to chance either. An advanatgeous mutation itself may be a chance event, but perpetuation of it is directed by the forces of natural selection.
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pi·rate /ˈpaɪrÉ™t/ Pronunciation Key – Show Spelled Pronunciation[pahy-ruht] Pronunciation Key – Show IPA Pronunciation noun, verb, -rat·ed, -rat·ing.
–noun 1. a person who robs or commits illegal violence at sea or on the shores of the sea.
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Good… I’m going to go to my local beach and steal an old woman’s purse… then pistol whip her and say it was in the name of the FSM. (Note: No you dolts, I’m not actually going to go do this… but according to the FSM and his flimsy moral standards it’s certainly within the realm of you people and your flimsy religion)
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Post away TLM, as you will be completely ignored on this particualr thread!
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It responded to me… I’d be damned. I thought it said it wouldn’t. Guess this Wench isn’t one to tell the truth.
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Does anyone besides me hear the missed-the-point-yet-again ramblings of a certain NotLaughingMan? It’s sad that he’s the only argumentative person who’s been here the past few days, considering all he does is boast about how smart he is and stupid we are….where are all the fundies?
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We’ve got an IDiot pseudo-scientist on this one gill. Ignore the poor child.
RAmen
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Not every one of my comments is “I’m smarter than you all”. Most of them are though… I figure if I say it enough times you guys will believe it. I already know you people are gullible seeing as how you believe in a giant meat sac making the world… I just think I should take advantage of your gullitabilty.
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Hey, did you guys know that Gullible really isn’t in the dictionary?
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@gill Dec 17th, 2006 at 8:58 pm
BTW gill, did you read the evidence for FSM I post on this thread?
http://www.venganza.org/2006/11/15/spaghetti-and-pasta-didnt-exist-till-the-500-900ad.htm
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The article was in the Creative Science Quarterly
RAmen
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@TheLaughingMan
It’s not a meat sac it’s a Spagetti Monster…what the hell is wrong with you?
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My mistake, rather it was in the Science Creative Quarterly. ;)
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Hi Spotted Zebra
A troll is a troll is a troll……
RAmen
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Nikkiee– Ooh, I shall have to check that out…
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@Wench Nikkiee
Ahoy Shipmate! A troll is a troll indeed…but surely even a troll can tell the difference between a meat sac and a flying richly aromatic pasta deity (that we know and love as The Flying Spagetti Monster) who, in his wisdom, created the universe including TheLaughingMan.
Ship’s Cat was ill on the aft deck last night and I’ll wager 5 beers to 3 strippers that the fishy remnants of Ship’s Cat’s dinner has a firmer grip on reality then TheLaughingMan…perhaps the noodley one has sent him to test us
RAmen.
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Wise saying:
‘No brain, no pain and no pain, no gain’
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Ah yes, another Idiot spouting the same tired old ambiguity. Quote-mining is still dishonest. Cherry-picking is not validation by default. Moving the goal posts is just plain silly. But is it art? Since art is open to interpretation by the viewer it actually makes a point—be it at the top of it’s head—and since IDeism is equally open to interpretation since it has no formal theory to work with, I would have to conclude that FSMism is just as scientifically appropriate. By it’s own logic. But then, what do I know, I’m just a smug Pastafarian member of the evilutionist conspiracy.
RAmen
MJK
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Methinks UnLaughingBoy has a crush on you Nikkiee :) (who doesn’t) He desperately begs for your attention and flagrantly attempts to amaze us with his wit at every turn. His own personal thread was no longer sufficient to suit his needs and found the wherewithall to bless us with his presence here. Such a fine contribution to our fine galleon is he. So sad his life is such a catastrophe. May he find refuge aboard our fine vessel. Or not.
Ramen
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I have decided that I’m going to ignore all TLGs’ posts from now on. I may refer to him indirectly and I will eagerly read all his posts as they make me laugh in a David Brent kind of way. I study his form and witlessness in the hope that I can one day mimic such behaviour for comic affect.
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“Unlaughingboy” “TLG” “Troll”… there you guys go with the name calling again. Way to go. I like how you guys have to stoop to Kindgarden attack methods to try and dismiss my points. You people are truly pathetic if name calling is the only way you can disprove my arguments.
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TLM,
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My dad can beat up your dad.
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OEJ
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As an eminent psychologist, I have read all TheLaughingMan’s comments with much interest. I find apparent evidence of strong attention seeking behaviour. This person continually repeats comments made by others as if they are his own missives in an attempt to gain attention. It is not often a psychologist is able to observe such a fine example of this behavior in a real time situation.
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Hail hitler
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u arz fagz sux by bronz baulz u azz fukerz
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gfbib iujbih, i jw jou iwillo iajjd wihwuiqw jbujqjsjkwra opkpk0zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!
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Who are all these unintelligible weirdos, and where do they keep coming from?
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Iz computerz time forz day mentalz inztitutonz
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It is Monday and the school boys are back at it. Pitiful.
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Another thought about validation: it is astounding to me that the IDiots continue to push this idea that without a god to worship that life has no meaning. Why is it that they insist that their life’s validation come from a deity instead of from within their own goodness as a human being? Isn’t the validation more pure if you value yourself rather than trying to please an insatiable exterior force? Throw another virgin on the fire!
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Amusing. The guy states that he isn’t a lawyer, but he tends to write incomprehensibly (is that a word?). It might be amusing to trot over to his blog for more “insight”.
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You’re boring. Stop boring everybody.
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@Wench Nikkiee Dec 17th, 2006 at 3:57 pm (ID is phoney debate about phoney science – to quickly para-phrase you if I may).
I’d love to know how much of this ID guff is the construction you describe – to keep ID as an apparently credible hypothesis by continuing to claim ‘the juries out – look at the debate’ [Fuck that lot] and poor mis-guided individuals who are sucked in by it [I have sympathy].
That’s one of the funny things about the CoFSM they usually come in (like CYMAM here) and go ‘why would anyone be so stupid as to believe this rubbish’ and we try various gentle forms of ‘hello! looked in mirror recently?’
I wish there was an internet smilie for ‘HELLO! McFLY! ANYBODY HOME!’.
RAMen.
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@ TLM
Sanity is boring, why would we wan’t keep something boring when given the option to discard it, even if only for a moment?
Why do you hate Bobby so much for giving us this site? If you’re willing to play, you can have a lot more fun than by just mocking.
If you want to call me an idiot for this, I really couldn’t care less. The main reason you get insulted here is because it is extremely hard to resist the temptation to make many, many snide comments.
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the ‘wan’t’ in my last post was supposed to be ‘want to’, obviously enough, but I do prefer not to have people jumping down my throat too much, it gets awfully hard to breathe
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@moochie Dec 17th, 2006 at 5:58 pm.
It is very common of people to mis-understand pattern.
Members of the general public will select against lottery numbers they consider to be ‘not sufficiently random’ even though all lines have equal chance.
It’s very easy to confuse ‘pattern’ with ‘intent’, ‘consequence’ (outcome) with ‘purpose’ and information with knowledge and/or meaning.
The IDiots romp in with these unambiguous but poorly understood concepts and have a field day usually trying to science it up a bit for colour.
The ID argument is:
1. We couldn’t be here by chance. (We could)
2. Now, come on, DNA and stuff how unlikely and important is that? (Probably not very over time in the right conditions – e.g. Earth)
There’s one of the over 300 proofs god exists I like:
1. Look at the world/universe/this giraffe.
2. Therefore God exists.
That’s it from ID. Whoah guys got a bit excited there! Let’s go back and ask you to resolve the errors of definition, understanding, relevance and interpetation in this mountain you’ve knocked out.
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@ Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA
Creationists seem to have a ’slightly’ different form of English to most of it, the phrase ‘god did it’ in creationist, roughly translates to ‘I don’t know’ in normal English, I say roughly, because, due to the nuances of translation, the ‘I don’t know’ phrase most people use misses out on the underlying tone of ‘there is no way you can change my mind, lalalala’
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@Adolph hitler – hail hitler? I think snow is more likely.
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@ Dr. C. Maglacy Dec 18th, 2006 at 7:45 am
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Stay tuned, you could get a terms worth out of the little nematode.
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who here has the balls to go as hitler???? oh gawd dahm.
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:E Want. To. Respond. To. Witless. Twat. Must. Resist. Urge. Will. Pass. He. Will. Drift. Off. Must. Resist…
Question: Is :E a recognised emoticon for ‘through clenched teath?
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It is now. :-)
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If someone can now tell me what my teath are…
Dang this laptop keyviard-thingy.
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@The Original Poster:
Ohhhhhh….. what a pretentious little art-school asshole you are, aren’t you? Could I be but arsed, I would drag myself down to your crayola-coloured level and have a short sharp word, but I just can’t find the will to do so.
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How about this: we’ll make a deal. You promise to shut the hell up forever, and I’ll graciously let you sign the Letter at http://www.letter2ted.org?
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@everybody else who knows the Davey:
Hello! Too tired to post much lately, and I usually just say the same things over and over again anyway, on account of how the retards tend to dribble the same damn fool nonsense over and over again in the first place. For example:
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@anyone who is left, having subtracted the sum of the above two sets:
In summary:
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1. Evolution is a fact
2. We are cousins of chimpanzees
3. No serious scientist disputes that
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A sing-along version for the hard-of-thinking is available: click my link.
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What was that Davey.
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http://www.letter2ted.org
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Sounds like a good link that http://www.letter2ted.org thing.
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I hope people will at least have a look at http://www.letter2ted.org
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PS Did you hear the news today. The cops have arrested someone for the 5 murders, he has a myspace blog? Haven’t looked at it yet but no doubt will?
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Oh yeah. Looky Looky. Thanks for the reminder Alchemist.
It’s like the “ethical dilemma” of watching Steve Urwin cop it. If it was on a DVD on your mantlepiece it would be watched before the end of Corrie…
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Don’t do soaps, Captain :) As to the Steve Irwin thing. Well, sorry, I didn’t try to find the footage. I thought he was a star and didn’t want to see his last moments. At least he went out doing what he loved! That’s all we can hope for.
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Steve would have been absolutely stoked to go out like that.
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I hope to go out with a beer in one hand and a stripper in the other…then I can get to beer and stripper heaven and really start enjoying the benefits of Pastafarianism.
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RAmen Nikkiee. A big serious RAmen
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Steve was a legend!
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Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA Dec 18th, 2006 at 1:05 pm
Have you seen this?
http://www.godlessgeeks.com/LINKS/GodProof.htm
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Beastly, I have. That’s the one I was refering to.
The ID guy above and in the link are doing no.6 and no.73.
Tee Hee. This is fun. RAMen
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My kids were really cut up when Steve died.
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Not as cut up as he was obviously!
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Cap. eeew? Even I wouldn’t sink that low, well, yes I would but you beat me to it :)
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@Beastly Rich
Great link! How many times have we come across this at CoFSM
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ARGUMENT FROM CREATION, a.k.a. ARGUMENT FROM PERSONAL INCREDULITY (I)
(1) If evolution is false, then creationism is true, and therefore God exists.
(2) Evolution can’t be true, since I lack the mental capacity to understand it; moreover, to accept its truth would cause me to be uncomfortable.
(3) Therefore, God exists.
RAmen
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I think they missed a couple – there’s only a few hundred(!)
n. ARGUMENT AFTER KEATS, a.k.a. DESIGN/TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (XIII)
(1) Beauty is truth.
(2) Truth is beauty.
(3) Therefore God exists.
n. SELECTIVE SCIENCE ARGUMENT
(1) Take all the scientific evidence that either supports OR undermines the existence of God.
(2) Declare the existence of God is not a scientific proposition and discard the undermining evidence as inadmissible.
(3) Observe that all admissible scientific evidence is in support of the existence of God.
(4) Therefore God exists.
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FSM. Where is the the little pustule aka laughingboy? Sorry Nikkiee but I’m bored and want to play with him. I know we shouldn’t encourage the little spirochaete but what the hell.
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I think he has a thing for you :)
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Please Alchemist, don’t encourage he who shall not be named.
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@Alchemist Dec 18th, 2006 at 4:14 pm
Both my mother and one of my dogs have been hit by sting rays. My mother was hit in the hand when she was in her 20s. She said it was the most painful thing she had ever experienced. My dog didn’t say much, but she had an ‘I feel stupid’ look on her face when she came out of the water with the barb sticking out of the flesh of her nose!
The rays come right up to the edge of the water. When the water was calm and clear, this Rhotty, (now deceased of old age) used to chase them, trying to play with them. I’m sure the rays were playing the game with her. They would just shoot off out into deeper water, then after the dog gave up, they would come back into the shallow right in front of her again.
Steve did a hell of a job in getting the kids interested in, and aware or nature.
RAmen
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Nikkiee. Steve’s enthusiasm for nature was gold dust! He wasn’t such an icon in the uk as in Oz. but he was still a household name. He really will be missed. Anyone that can fire the kids interest in the natural world is a total star in my book.
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Let’s hope he’s got the beers in for us when we arrive.
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This guy is fantastic. I haven’t laughed so much for weeks!
Please PLEASE come back soon CJYman
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@Alchemist
‘He wasn’t such an icon in the uk as in Oz.’
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He wasn’t anywhere near as big here as he was in America. In fact he was probably even bigger in the UK as well. I think a lot of Aussies took a while to get over the cringe factor of his showmanship dialogue. They just didn’t, initially, look at him from the right angle.
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Nikkiee – feeding your kids to the crocks tends to do that :)
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My kids love Urwin because he get’s close up and personal with scary animals.
Kids their age have this morbid fascination with things like that.
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Has anyone got a link the this “Tom Stephens” MySpace.
I heard briefly on the news that he describes himself as lonely and appears to have lived with his mother.
OMG. OMG. That fits the nettie who I no longer name!
If some FBI agent is reading this post during a deep background search on some serial killer. We saw it coming!!
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Humle apologies. My cultural progamming over came me.
I mean OMFSM OMFSM not OMG !)
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By the way Nikkiee – the UK is no longer the country you remembered.
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Yes, you are right, Nikkiee, Irwin was a huge star here in the U.S. Lots of people were very upset at his death.
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@Re-Oared Marc
By the time of his death, he was huge in Oz too. The country really went into shock for a few weeks afterwards. The memorial service at Australia Zoo was televised worldwide and most kids, here, were able to watch it at school.
On top of that, within a week we lost Peter Brock, killed on the racetrack.
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yeah, well at least this person can figure out and appreciate the satire. he dared delve deeper than the surface, and chose not to instantly spout out about how we are all noodle worshiping idiots, even though he felt threatend. like the caged animal that is all of the other hate mailing retards. i respect this person’s opinion, but fuck him for hating. – beer cheese.
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Yes, leave quotes by an opium-addled pedophile to logically prove the existence of god.
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Came across this a few days back and forgot to post it. This link may have already been posted. Just can’t keep track of them all now.
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Right to Sue over White House’s “Propaganda Vehicle for Religion”
Supreme Court Accepts Hein v. Freedom From Religion Foundation
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http://ffrf.org/news/2006/supreme.php
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The link that led me to it:
Freedom From Religion Foundation
Losing Faith In Faith: From Preacher To Atheist by Dan Barker: Chapter 35
A criticism of ‘Mere Christianity’ by C. S. Lewis
http://ffrf.org/books/lfif/?t=assertions
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I suspect this letter was posted by a first-year philosophy student who hasn’t yet learned enough to realize he doesn’t know jack shit.
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excellent satire … unless
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Excellent satire of the criticisms of science and Evolution … unless you guys actually think the creation of Jesus Christ and its subsequent religion is a valid critique of science and Evolution in the form of satire or actual truth for that matter. In that case, try studying and understanding your “opponents†first before attacking. Or maybe this “religion†of Jesus Christ is just a good case of showing that people will believe almost anything (assuming that your church members ACTUALLY believe Christianity to be true). Yet, I very highly doubt that people are QUITE that stupid. Given enough time, they should be eliminated by the furious noodle of the Flying Spaghetti Monster anyway.
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However, both ways I do enjoy and appreciate the artistic work and creativity you have put into Jesus Christ and its subsequent church. It, as well as the hate mail you receive, is truly hilarious.
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It’s a good thing that artistic method isn’t restrained by religious zealotry. The religion of Jesus Christ is evidence that insane ranting is not restrained by logic.
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As an aside, since art is allowed to be taught in school in the form of an art class, the religion of Jesus Christ should be allowed in school as well. Drop me a line if you need help creating a case (I wish I were a lawyer).
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Similarly, science or philosophy would also be considered art if it did not attempt to validly explain the existence of good and evil, reason, and other enigmas of the “human condition.†Art attempts to depict; religion, science, and philosophy attempt to explain in a valid manner.
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Nevertheless, I can see how the religion of Jesus Christ could attempt to explore the very concept of validity and its relation to truth. However, in this case, it should also attempt to be more valid itself and satirically examine or disprove science as well in order to be more encompassing and relative in addressing validity, in my humble opinion.
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Or the creation of Jesus Christ and its religion may be just a load of quasi-artistic BS, in accordance with all gods written in history who were included within and were a part of the universe and describable as natural objects. re: ra (sun-god), poseidon (god of the sea), Jesus Christ (crucified on a cross and general bloody mess endorsing symbolic cannibalism) “may his wounds be honoredâ€
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Regardless of the psychology or validity behind Jesus Christ, thank you for the humor, and good luck in continuing to intelligently or not so intelligently (whichever the case may be) evolve Jesus Christ and his religion.
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May your God given or unguided religious-zealotry given ability for creativity and Jesus Christ’s symbolic cannibalism guide you in your never ending search for that religious-fanatic concept of Truth.
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- Cap’nUberbob
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I leave with you these three quotes:
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“If the whole universe has no spaghetti, we should never have found out that it has no spaghetti: just as, if there were no meatballs in the universe and therefore no creatures with meatball tasting organs, we should never know it was meatball-less. Meatballs would be without meaning.â€
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- Cap’nUberbob
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“If the solar system was brought about by a “God†on a “throne†in “heavenâ€, then the appearance of organic life on this planet was also brought about by a “God†on a “throne†in “heavenâ€, and the whole creation of Man was caused by a “God†on a “throne†in “heaven†too. If so, then all our present thoughts are mere thoughts forced on us by a “God†on a “throne†in “heaven†– the intentional by-product of the all-powerful control of a “God†on a “throne†in “heavenâ€. And this holds for the thoughts of the materialists and astronomers as well as for anyone else’s. But if their thoughts – i.e., of Materialism and Astronomy – are merely intentional by-products, why should we believe them to be true? I see no reason for believing that one intentional act should be able to give me a correct account of all the other intentional acts. It’s like expecting that the intentional shape taken by the splash when you upset a milk-jug should give you a correct account of how the jug was made and why it was upset.â€
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- Cap’nUberbob
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“The most incomprehensible thing about the universe is that it was made by a Flying Spaghetti Monster.â€
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- Albert Einstein
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@Cap’nUberbob
Nice. an exelent touche. (Applause)
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As a normal person, I have read Dr. C. Maglacy’s one comment with much interest. I find apparent evidence of strong psycologically incorrect thoughts. This person continually tries to point out that I make comments made by others as if they are my own missives in an attempt to gain attention. It is not often that a normal person can observe that a psychologist can be totaly wrong in a real time situation.
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As noted, I’ve clearly stated that if you guys declare FSMism a Satire and mark it as such… I’ll leave. Anything that comes across as attention seeking or anger is purely coincidental.
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Maglacy… Get an MD before you speak. And if you have an MD… then it should be revoked quick. Way to incorrectly annalyze me.
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real time! Shit! I never knew psychology was turn based!
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What’s your first language laughingboy?
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To TheLaughingMan,
Thank you for your comment on my initial observations. You appear to feel, somewhat strongly I may add, that you have an untrained talent for analysis of clinical manifestation of psychological phenomena, do you not? I must concur, that you may well be correct in pointing out that my prior observation may not have been entirely comprehensive. My premise, was but preliminary. It is, however, your response which holds the greatest observational interest for one in my profession. I thank you for taking time to respond.
Yours Sincerely
C. Maglacy
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llalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalaalalalalalalalalalalalalalaalalalalalalalalalalalalaalalalalalalalalala
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
i just made a poopy in my pants
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Uh, does anybody else believe that TLM and Dr C Maglacy are one and the same? He seems to be talking to himself. Shit, this guy is whackjob. Yooohooo, little boy! NOBODY TAKES YOU SERIOUSLY.
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Also, you disrespectful little prick, I am old enough to be your fucking grandfather. If you were my kid or grandkid, after slapping the shit out of you, you would be packing up for military school. They would teach you respect for your elders. But, alas, you are not. So, I guess we must continue to endure your boring, idiotic bullshit.
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Here’s a thought… The Laughing Boi, does make us laugh.
The jokes on him and he doesn’t even get it. That’s sad… hahahaha
Where we at now? Nerds 100,000 TLB 0 ?
Anybody want to buy some miracle water? I’ve got a great deal on it this week!
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One other thing, where have all the wenches gone???
Ramen
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Sometimes he is funny, sometimes he is merely annoying, but most of the time he is as irritating as jock itch. I reserve the right to scratch my balls. Obnoxious kids really push my buttons. His parents should be shot for not being good teachers or adequate roll models. I hope they have lots of money because he is going to need extensive therapy as an adult. No doubt about it.
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“As noted, I’ve clearly stated that if you guys declare FSMism a Satire and mark it as such… I’ll leave.”
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As noted, the whole point of satire is that it is not directly stated to BE a satire. If you call it a satire then you’re ruining the joke, my friend. Plus, I’m sorry, but if by now you don’t get it then, yeesh, you deserve to be fooled.
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Also, I wonder how much time you, who are so much smarter then us mere mortals, have spent posting on this site trying to get us to change it? I post when I have a spare minute or two; you seem to be quite the lurker. Not that that’s a bad thing, but, y’know, if you’re gonna call us nerds then it makes you look rather….dumb?
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Lastly: I’m bored and killing time until I have to run to work. Really the only reason I’m bothering with this post at all. ;)
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Oh, and I’ll take two quarts of the Miracle Vodka.
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Any satire is purely coincidental, and we are all aware of that.
Hail His Noodley Appendages
RAmen
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Re-Oared Marc Dec 19th, 2006 at 4:05 pm
Sometimes he is funny, sometimes he is merely annoying, but most of the time he is as irritating as jock itch. I reserve the right to scratch my balls. Obnoxious kids really push my buttons. His parents should be shot for not being good teachers or adequate roll models. I hope they have lots of money because he is going to need extensive therapy as an adult. No doubt about it.
.
. We could/should use him as an example, of what is wrong with American youths today.
If he wasn’t such an ass, I’d probably feel sorry for him. But I don’t.
At least he’s got his AIM buddies to chat with, it’s been said over and over, if you’re going to have kids. Teach them! His parents never got the memo.
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And Ok, I’ll get that Miracle Vodka out to you in the AM.
Ramen
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Well! Speak of the wenches!
Hi ya, Nikkiee! Hope all is well down under.
Ramen
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In fact, this is precisely stated on the button!
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@Laugh:
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> As noted, I’ve clearly stated that if you guys
> declare FSMism a Satire and mark it as such… I’ll
> leave.
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For my part, I have no desire to see you go. I just want you to admit that you aren’t really an atheist as you have claimed.
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Everything you have ever said on this site suggests you are a theist. Only a theist would be so insistent that satire be clearly labelled so as to distinguish it from faith. As a theist like the rest of us, you are so close to being right. You just have to admit that the Creator has a sense of humour and smells of sweet roasted garlic.
-
Brother Boyardee
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Hi Peter, can’t stop and chat at present. Have promised to deliver 100 FSM pamphlets to a friend who is planning on a little conversion excursion. I did a little mixing and matching of some of the FSM flyers as well (50 with various two sided presentations :)
Just in time for the pagan festival of Mithras! Catch you all later
RAmen
ps Hopefully, they’ll get some pics and post them. ;)
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I suggest that Cap’nUberbob @ Dec 19th, 2006 at 11:23 am has made the best post this site has ever seen.
Possibly including the open letter (far may its noodly appendages reach).
RAmen.
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Alchemist,
If you wanted Tom Stephens mySpace its been closed.
However if you go to Amazon and search for “www.myspace.com/85784962″ you can get it cached.
It’s my bed time now.
Nighty night all.
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well, it seems we have someone who is inherently great at sounding smart. Now lets examine the sounding part. Does anyone here really think this dude has any clue about what he says means. I can teach my four year old brother to say “E equals M multiplied by C squared” but that means in no way that he understands. This guy sounds like he threw up a thesaurus (i should probably find out if thats spelled right….. nah)
*ahem
back on topic, if this guy were to say what he ment in terms that were not used solely to confuse the reader, he may be a worthy opponent to this, our pastafarian church, but as long as he continues sucking up words from books that sound smart and spitting them onto a paper, he seems nearly equivalent to “someone”, who (and i quote) rather distintly told us “Ya’ll drink douche water”
i kindly regress to resume my spaghetti worship
RAMEN to ye all!!!!!!!
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oh, and lemme add a question mark to the end of that second sentence.
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sry bout the third post in a row, but i was readin through the other posts, and being a teen myself, you cannot defend laughingboy with the teen sheild. I suffer from perhaps the same, if not more extreeme, issues of being trapped in a household that provides no satisfaction in life, but i dont make up for it by being a little ass hole. Whether you’re 16 or 89, you still have the ability to controll your own actions. (With the possible exeption, of course, of epiliepsy)
I now bid my fellow pastafarians farewell for the night.
RAMEN!
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Hey all.
i’ve recently stumbled upon pastafarianism by a comment on Dilbert’s Blog. read it on wiki, and now going thru the website.
two words:
FUCKING BRILLIANT.
really , congratulations from Argentina, this is hilarius, smart, and quite wisdomy (does that word even exist?)
the eight rather’s are quite adecuate, also.
Ramen from a new follower
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Creationist School Science
WINNING PROJECTS FROM THE FELLOWSHIP BAPTIST CREATION SCIENCE FAIR 2001
http://www.scq.ubc.ca/?p=548
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Ooooh this one’s my favourite; “2nd Place: “Women Were Designed For Homemaking†”
.
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This part in particular has to be the best
“social sciences show that the wages for women workers are lower than for normal workers, meaning that they are unable to work as well and thus earn equal pay;”
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If we tried that with our wenches, they’d fry our meatballs.
.
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Still, “exegetics shows that God created Eve as a companion for Adam, not as a co-worker.”
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Why the hell do the women support that?
(I’m gonna say a systematic regime of brainwashing and ritualised child abuse)
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How the hell does the kid explain that to his mum?
“Mummy, today, for science, I’m going to show you are a born servant”?
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What the hell would the mother say? Actually, make that What the hell SHOULD the mother say (assuming she wasn’t brainwashed by this cult)?
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2nd Place: “Maximal Packing Of Rodentia Kinds: A Feasibility Study”
Jason Spinter’s (grade 12) project was to show the feasibility of Noah’s Ark using a Rodentia research model (made of a mixture of hamsters and gerbils) as a representative of diluvian life forms. The Rodentia were placed in a cage with dimensions proportional to a section of the Ark. The number of Rodentia used (58) was calculated using available Creation Science research and was based on the median animal size and their volumetric distribution in the Ark. The cage was also fitted with wooden dowels inserted at regular intervals through the cage walls, forming platforms which provided support for the Rodentia. Although there was little room left in the cage, all Rodentia were able to move just enough to ward off muscle atrophy. Food pellets and water were delivered to sub-surface Rodentia via plastic drinking straws inserted into the Rodentia-mass, which also served to allow internal air flow. Once a day, the cage was sprayed with water to cleanse any built-up waste. Additionally, the cage was suspended on bungee cords to simulate the rocking motion of a ship. The study lasted 30 days and 30 nights, with all Rodentia surviving at least long enough afterwards to allow for reproduction. These findings strongly suggest that Noah’s Ark could hold and support representatives of all antediluvian animal kinds for the duration of the Flood and subsequent repopulation of the Earth.
That is so wrong!
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Of course “Uncle Steve” isn’t a monkey. he is EVOLVED FROM a monkey. We tell them time and time again, but they still refuse to hear us.
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I dont think its just me thinking this, but did this bloke just mention natural selection? Because that’s associated with evolution. Intelligent design was just created as an alternative to evolution…….. talk about contradicting ideas
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“1st Place: “Using Prayer To Microevolve Latent Antibiotic Resistance In Bacteriaâ€
… The bacteria cultures were divided into two groups, one group (A) received prayer while the other (B) didn’t. … In the end, Group A was significantly more resistant than Group B to both antibiotics.”
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Pull the other one!
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Well that certainly trounces the findings of this study:
http://www.ahjonline.com/article/PIIS0002870305006496/abstract?browse_volume=151&issue_key=TOC%40%40JOURNALSNOSUPP%40YMHJ%400151%400004&issue_preview=no&select1=no&select1=no&vol=
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I bet those medical nerds are kicking themselves now! Them and their fancy degrees and statistical analysis!
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Forget double blind studies. Forget statistically significant populations. With $20 bucks and an unused kitchen you can prove the whole thing in an afternoon!
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OK, it was a science fair, so I’ll be kind. I suppose it’s too much to ask that they put some actual science in their science fair.
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OEJ
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we cannot declare this website as satire because it isnt. Any atheist remarks are surely purely coincidental. When i said, “there is no God” it was in a metaphorical sense. (i sounds smart :D). if thios website is declared satire, the whole religion falls apart. wasnt it made to show how stupid other religions were (of course not, it was made to worship FSM lol)?!?! this goes out the window if declared satire.
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And to quote the opening paragraph of the website that’s taken from “As a Creation Scientist, one of my greatest duties that I take great pleasure in is introducing the works of the Lord to the young generation. The sparkle of wonderment that fills their eyes in knowing the creative power of God fills my heart with the Lord’s divine Love.”
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Oh FSM, where’s the bucket? I’m gonna vom!!!
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HHHHggggguuughgh!!!!
Anougher good one from the same place “This is also the first year that Muslim students from the Al-Jannah Islamic school have been invited to participate; two of their students presented a project on human anatomy entitled “Allah (SWT) Created Me” which, while it was found ineligible for a prize due to a number of Biblical inconsistencies” I nearly fell over laughing.
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I offer $259,000 to any one who can prove the Flying Spaghetti Monster doesn’t exist.
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Wench Nikky Dec 20th, 2006 at 2:16 am
Creationist School Science
WINNING PROJECTS FROM THE FELLOWSHIP BAPTIST CREATION SCIENCE FAIR 2001
http://www.scq.ubc.ca/?p=548
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Thanks Nikkiee. That entire website rocks! Just what I needed to kick off a new day!
Ramen
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Wouldn’t the stuff they’re teaching those kids be considered mental abuse? If not, I think we can all agree that they should be, well, those of us with sense at any rate
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HDD.
You either have it, or you don’t, ‘nough said.
Ramen
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There is some interesting (infuriating) stuff at that ‘creation science’ education site. Also includes information about which retailers/businesses (Target) are linked to Satan. All intentionally directed at kids. I really can’t find words to describe these leeches. (offense to wild-type leeches unintentional)
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OBJECTIVE: Creation Education
With Dr. Richard Paley
http://objectiveministries.org/creation/
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Dawkins Watch
With Commentary by Dr. Richard Paley
http://objectiveministries.org/creation/dawkinswatch.html
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“Articles On Evolutionism” (These are also listed on my main page.)
Those Wacky Evolutionists!
Evolutionist Shenanigans & Assorted Darwinalia With Commentary by Dr. Richard Paley
–Evolutionism Propaganda:
Examples of how Evolutionists spread their false doctrines using PBS, children’s programming, and the Apple Macintosh.
–”Aquatic Ape Theory”:
Evolutionists sink to new lows, leagues under the sea.
–The Eye:
Complicated and purposefully designed. Could random mutations really do that?
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This site has everything!!! (warning: Do not eat just prior to visiting)
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@Wench Nikky Dec 20th, 2006 at 12:55 pm
Arrgh…..’awaiting moderation’ again (why does posting some links, but not others, induce this?) Repost with modified links:
There is some interesting (infuriating) stuff at that ‘creation science’ education site. Also includes information about which retailers/businesses (Target) are linked to Satan. All intentionally directed at kids. I really can’t find words to describe these leeches. (offense to wild-type leeches unintentional)
.
OBJECTIVE: Creation Education
With Dr. Richard Paley
objectiveministries.org/creation/
.
Dawkins Watch
With Commentary by Dr. Richard Paley
objectiveministries.org/creation/dawkinswatch.html
.
“Articles On Evolutionism†(These are also listed on my main page.)
Those Wacky Evolutionists!
Evolutionist Shenanigans & Assorted Darwinalia With Commentary by Dr. Richard Paley
–Evolutionism Propaganda:
Examples of how Evolutionists spread their false doctrines using PBS, children’s programming, and the Apple Macintosh.
–â€Aquatic Ape Theoryâ€:
Evolutionists sink to new lows, leagues under the sea.
–The Eye:
Complicated and purposefully designed. Could random mutations really do that?
.
This site has everything!!! (warning: Do not eat just prior to visiting)
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@Peter Popoff Dec 20th, 2006 at 10:51 am
‘Thanks Nikkiee. That entire website rocks! Just what I needed to kick off a new day!.
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Yeah, it is a good site Peter. Bobby’s ‘Open Letter’ is in the archives there as well. This one is a gem:
OF PENGUINS AND PASTA By Toby Leonard
(Evidence for FSM)
http://www.scq.ubc.ca/?p=233
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We’re all in trouble now… Look out Kanas…
http://www.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/europe/12/20/uk.komodo.reut/index.html
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You think Mary could have been part Komodo Dragon, or at least some sort of lizard?
Another thing I’ve always wondered about: How did they see, and collect all of those microscopic organisms when they were loading up the Ark?
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‘He said the incubating eggs could hatch around Christmas.’
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Another virgin birth at xmas? Aha..Flora, the Komodo Dragon is the new messiah!
His Noodleyness has gotten drunk again.
RAmen
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Hard to say about mary, I think she probably was a reptile of some sort? “Lot Lizard” comes to mind?
As far as the seeing thing… I think like we have 20/20 vision, Those old folks probably had like… 40/40 vision? Or something of the like? I’m just speculating of course.
Ramen
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@C.S. Lewis :Dec 18th, 2006 at 7:28 pm “Yes, leave quotes by an opium-addled pedophile to logically prove the existence of god.”
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Sorry .. quick flash-back (yes, I do have the munchies, since you ask. Is it ok to sacrifice a bar of chocolate?) Anyway .. I think C.S.Lewis (the poster) might have got his namesake muddled up with Lewis Carroll. Also, Lewis Carroll was probably not the deviant popularly supposed (see Wikipedia). Plus he was a far better writer than C.S.Lewis (the original). Therefore, God exists. No .. that can’t be right.
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“…allowing them to microevolve antibiotic resistance. Escherichia coli bacteria…”
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OH MY SCIENCE! THE EVIL CHRISTIANS ARE TRYING TO KILL US ALL WITH DRUG RESISTANT E.COLI!
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Seriously, what the hell? What would you think if it instead read “Student X and Student Y (grades ten & eleven) did a project showing how the power of prayer can weaponize a typical strain of anthrax, increasing its capability to kill infidels by over one thousand times.”
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@moochie
‘Plus he was a far better writer than C.S.Lewis (the original). Therefore, God exists. No .. that can’t be right.’
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hahahahaha
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I came across this comment, reguarding ‘objectiveministries’. There wasn’t much else at the site to go with it.
“I don’t normally point at “weird stuff on the Net†but after visiting a few pages of Objective: Christian Ministries I honestly can’t figure out whether they’re for real, or a side project by The Onion staff. I particularly gasp at the Creation Science Fair from which the title of this note is taken. Thanks to Tim Romano for the pointer. [Update: Several people have written me that this is a parody, but nobody has really provided much solid evidence. But the more I look at it, the more I conclude that it just has to be, based only on the language.]”
http://www.tbray.org/ongoing/When/200x/2003/08/16/ObjectiveC
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Could ‘Objective: Christian Ministries’ be a side project by The Onion staff?
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The world is a scary place. Thank his Noodly Goodness that my bomb shelter is almost complete. How long is it before radiation dissipates from the ambient air?
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Creationism takes another hit in the nose:
http://www.au.org/site/News2?abbr=pr&page=NewsArticle&id=8797&security=1002&news_iv_ctrl=1241
Praise His Noodliness
RAmen
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I think that the Science Creative Quarterly (motto: in which, with respect to our name, we are as confused as you are) is a very funny parody. Thanks!
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Just read the rodents / arc one. Is that for real? If so do you think the SPCA knows about it? I don’t know US law (and don’t want to get into an animal rights debate) but surely ….?
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I have no doubt that Science Creative Quarterly is a parody, but if you look at where the creationist science fair thing came from at the bottom of the article, you’ll see that it came from Christian Ministries. The Christian Ministries website is either a very dry bit of satire of they’re a real organisation headed by a serial liar.
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Re-Oared
What about the ‘objectiveministries’ site?
http://objectiveministries.org/creation/wackyevolutionists.html
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The Creationist mantra: “Let us stagnate as one.”
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I pray to FSM that it’s a parody.
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PLEASE FSM, make it a parody, I don’t want to have to go to bed tonight knowing that I’m of the same specie as the fucktard that writes that bollocks, who thinks that he has any insight in any way in any area of human thought, who’s ideas could be picked apart by a child and who I suspect, deliberately misunderstands things so that he can tell the flock just how misguided the evil-utionists are.
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Nobody can the that stupid and dishonest. Please.
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Oh hell fire, you’re right Beastly Rich and thanks for the link Nikky.
“Pterosaurs, including the ancestors of pterodactyls (middle left) and rhamphorhynchi (middle right), lived peacefully with Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. (Artistic reconstruction by Peggy Miller.)” http://objectiveministries.org/creation/pterosaurs.html
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Although I don’t see how the human race reproduced as the Pterosaur seems to have made off with Adams ding-a-ling :)
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“Science Creative Quarterly”…”objective ministries”? Scary stuff. Are you really that bored to tears Nikki, or are you just that fed up with the fundies? Remind me never to get on your bad side. :)
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oh it is a parody, they have a link to the landover baptist church, which I know for a fact is a joke. Thank god for that!
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Oh no, I misread it, they want to SHUT DOWN the landover baptist church.
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This is obscene. http://objectiveministries.org/shutdown/
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Here is objective minitries ‘Sign the Prayer Book’ link
http://htmlgear.tripod.com/guest/control.guest?u=objectiveministries&i=2&a=view
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I am still not sure though. The whole site is so….well so realistic.
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@nikky Yeah, I’m not seeing much in the way of clues.
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@Mad John Kidd Dec 20th, 2006 at 2:24 pm
Creationism takes another hit in the nose:
http://www.au.org/site/News2?abbr=pr&page=NewsArticle&id=8797&security=1002&news_iv_ctrl=1241
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Yes hooray for that. The domino effect, is hopefully kicking in.
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@Mad John Kidd
Mad John Kidd Dec 20th, 2006 at 2:49 pm
“Science Creative Quarterlyâ€â€¦â€objective ministriesâ€? Scary stuff. Are you really that bored to tears Nikki”
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hahahahaha
’twas the ‘Evidence for FSM’ at scq that led me on that little journey. One link just led to another, you know how it is ;)
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Beastly Rich Dec 20th, 2006 at 2:50 pm
oh it is a parody, they have a link to the landover baptist church, which I know for a fact is a joke. Thank god for that!
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Oh no, I misread it, they want to SHUT DOWN the landover baptist church.
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This is obscene. http://objectiveministries.org/shutdown/
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It made me laugh, it made me cry. Mostly just laughed though… hahahahaha
Ramen
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With a ’spiritual warrior cat’ called Milton, owned by Dr Troy Franklin “.. a doctor of Demonology” and ‘Lambuel’ converting Buzz Lightyear (I think). I hope it is a parody. Unfortunately I don’t think it is.
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@Beastly Rich
‘Oh no, I misread it, they want to SHUT DOWN the landover baptist church.’
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Why, on earth would they want to shut down Landover?
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news1206/jesusruins.html
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Don’t hold your breath, mates. We may have won the battle but the war is still on:
http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2006/10/hugh_rosss_testable_scientific.php
RAmen
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Know your enemy:
http://www.godlessgeeks.com/LINKS/GodProof.htm
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I love the landover, but not enough to forsake FSM.
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@Nik—”One link just lead to another, you know how that is ;)”
Yes, I’m afraid I do.
RAmen
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I love Landover too. I have one of their t-shirts that sports my favorite bible quote: “Behold, I will corrupt your seed and spread dung upon your facesâ€. The most disturbing thing about Objective Ministries is that no one can tell if it’s fake.
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The guys who started Landover got kicked out of Bob Jones University, so they know the fundy thing from the inside and very well, and their site shows it.
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Loved the pic of Santa: (warning: do not let the kids see this!)
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news1206/santacritical.html
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@ Fr. CC
I especially liked the back to school gear: Landover Baptist Gun Club…Creation Science Club…Dept. of Demonology…Book Burning Club, etc. Welcome to Iowa!
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Who said xmas is no fun for atheists or FSM worshippers?
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@ Nikki
Being an Aussie, I’m sure you’ve heard Kevin Bloody Wilson’s “Santa Claus is Going to Town.”
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Objective ministries does seem to be a parody. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/OBJECTIVE:_Ministries
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Bloody good one. Had me fooled.
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Where’s me F**k’n bike, you mean?
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“…I’ve unwrapped all this other junk and there’s nothing that I like.
I wrote you a f**king letter and I come to see you twice
Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me f*cking bike……”
http://www.songlyrics.com/song-lyrics/Kevin_Bloody_Wilson/Miscellaneous/Christmas_Song/61379.html
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ahhh, that’s a relief. I should have known really but these people have a history of producting madmen
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@Alchemist Dec 20th, 2006 at 3:58 pm
‘Objective ministries does seem to be a parody. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/OBJECTIVE:_Ministries‘
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No Alchemist, the anti-christians wrote that wiki. ;)
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ha ha. I don’t know if I would have trusted it even if they said it wasn’t.
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@ Wenchy
I thought that was the title of a track on Kev’s Kristmas Album but I didn’t see it. It is part of the chorus but I don’t know the title. Is “Santa Claus was going to town” part of “Where’s me F***’n Bike? He’s got so many albums.
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Thank for the link but the effing bike song not the one I was thinking of. Can’t find it on his website.
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Well, I am completely confused now (not difficult to do). I love their T shirts from CafePress.
http://www.cafepress.com/objectivemin/
Jesus is the light, turn him on. haha
It’s either the best piss take I’ve seen (too good?) or …
I choose piss take
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Mad John, I was just thinking after I posted, that the ‘Santa…to town’ is a different song. I’ll have to see if I can find the lyrics somewhere.
We have a radio station here that plays all these types of songs over xmas, instead of the painful ‘over and over again’ carols. I tuned into it last year, (meant to make a list of some of the stuff they were playing…but didn’t :( ) and I can tell you, it was an FSM send. Must tune in today. The station prides themselves on finding/playing some obscure and really funny stuff.
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@Alchemist Dec 20th, 2006 at 4:23 pm
‘Well, I am completely confused now (not difficult to do).’
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Apparently a lot of xtians, from other church brands, inadvertantly find their way to that site. While I’d prefer that they join the CoFSM, I’m not one to discourage those seeking the salvation of Objective Ministries. :)
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The really scary thing, Nikky, is that I checked the edits on Wiki and ran a WHOIS search :). This site (CoFSM) has opened my eyes so wide that I really could believe Xtian Fundies could come up with something like that.
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Thankfully the joke’s on me.
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Hey Alchemist, I had to do a little reseach and follow a few links too.
Those creationsists are scary. Say no more. Wouldn’t want to spoil all the fun for the fundies who may be considering a brand switch. (on the basis that their own church may be getting a little too liberal)
RAmen
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So all this time, I’ve been lied too? There is no FSM?
Crap! There is beer anyway, I can attest to that!
Burp!
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Ah, yes. Some people we lucky and were born with a silver spoon in their mouth. All I got was my own sweaty foot :)
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were not we
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@ Peter Popoff—”So all this time, I’ve been lied too? There is no FSM?”
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Shhh, don’t tell the UnLaughingBoy, he might just get full of himself.
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Kev’s Xmas Greeting! free download
‘Santa Claus was going to town’
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http://www.kevinbloodywilson.com/site/animations/xmas.htm
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Thanks Nik, I knew I’d heard it somewhere.
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‘Santa Claus was going to town’
hahahahaha
Yes, our Kev’s isn’t known for his subtlety.
RAmen
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By the way, guys, don’t forget man’s best friend over Holiday, will you? They have a lot to deal with too, you know.
DESCENT OF DOG
By Murray Brozinsky
http://www.scq.ubc.ca/?p=613
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Well, that’s me linked out for the morning. Catch you all later.
RAmen
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Have a good one Nikky :)
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@Mad John Kidd Dec 20th, 2006 at 2:49 pm
‘Remind me never to get on your bad side. :)’
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Aww…c’mon Mad John, I got some of dem dere xtian principles. I believe ‘Do unto others, as you would have dem do to you’ and ‘Ask and thou shalt receive’
RAmen
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@ Nik
Well, in that case, give it to me baby!
RAmen
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I just signed the guest book at ‘objective ministries’. My, they do get a lot of hateful comments from humanists/seculists and evilutionists there.
hahahahahahahahaha
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@ Nik
‘Well, in that case, give it to me baby!’
No, only for the fundies who come to the CoFSM with those same xtian principles.
RAmen
ps I didn’t miss anything there! :)
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Left_Behind:_Eternal_Forces
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Left behind post rapture? Wondering what to do for a good night out?
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Here’s the answer: Left Behind!
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Convert your enemies with guns!
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Recruit fellow citizens, train them to be soldiers, builders, doctors, evangelists or musicians! Unless they’re women (who are only fit for doctoring and music)!
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Kill, and pray.
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Out just in time for christmas!
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Thanks Jingles
Complaints about the game on the wiki.
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“Muddied religious message”
Some Christian speakers have called the multiplayer feature, allowing gamers to play from the perspective of the Antichrist’s forces, into question. Detractors have suggested this feature takes away from the stated inspirational goal of Left Behind Games by making the forces seem equally matched or encouraging violent, anti-Christian roleplay.
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Oh dear, shows just how nasty/sad/sick these people are all round!
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@ Jingles
I like how they claim that it is no more violent than the old testament. Well, that certainly makes it okay then. As long as they have god’s permission.
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@ Nikki
I posted a link to an article on the HAR1 sequence by Carl Zimmer on the KS Board thread that you might be interested to read.
RAmen
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I’ve got a whole book that reads like that post, and I can’t get through a page of it. “The Universal Unified Field Law”, by A.D.Sarantites, published by Universal Science Foundation, 1963. It hurts by brain to try to read it. It takes a certain mind to write these types of things.
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Hey, I just googled this book and its worth at least $1000. I guess this type of stuff does have some value.
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I took a qick look at it just after you posted it. I save it for later on (ron) I don’t want to visit too many serious sites today. I got the link though, thanks.
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@Mad John
Just had a glance over that article. Looks very interesting. I think I might download the paper itself from from the Nature Journal.
Thanks
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@ Wenchy
Glad to be of service ;)
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I believe. Our heaven has a beer volcano. Must my life here on earth end in order to experience this sublime beer lava oozing from the noodly appendages which so gently pour the beer into icy cold glasss.
Yes, Virginia, there is a heavan. And it overflows wih milk and Victory Hop Devil. You just gotta believe…..
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nikky, thank you for the link to that wonderfull site, i’m still laughing.
Jingles: that was my favorite too, they really don’t teach these kids to properly check any arguments, or even using brains for independent thought, do they?
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@Jingles:
Thanks for the link (I think). The only good thing I can think of in regard to these games is that they reveal exactly what the fundys think.
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At least with this game they are being honest. I’ve always believed that the Ku Klux Klan was the most honest modern christian organization, displaying the values that are the heart and soul of the christian christian religion.
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Christian dominionism is anything but harmless. These people are a clear and present danger to any form of civilized society.
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@Nikky:
Thanks for the ‘Descent of Dog’ link. Now I’ll think of unintelligent design whenever I walk through a San Francisco park.
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Just been doing a bit more exploring around Objective Ministeries. That site is a real treasure hunt with lots of real treasure buried there. Did anyone check out :
‘Zounds Youth Rock Ministry’
http://objectiveministries.org/zounds/
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Click on the F.A.Q
Isn’t there another band called Zounds?
We have recently learned that a group of British anarchists from the
1970s had formed a punk-rock band called Zounds. (Their website can be
found here, but beware of offensive content.)
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and this is the link
http://www.zoundsonline.co.uk/hahn.html
RAmen
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@Wench Nikky Dec 21st, 2006 at 2:10 am
I DID IT AGAIN! Set off ‘Your comment is awaiting moderation’ ! !
Just been doing a bit more exploring around Objective Ministeries. That site is a real treasure hunt with lots of real treasure buried there. Did anyone check out :
‘Zounds Youth Rock Ministry’
http://objectiveministries.org/zounds/
.
Click on the F.A.Q
Isn’t there another band called Zounds?
We have recently learned that a group of British anarchists from the
1970s had formed a punk-rock band called Zounds. (Their website can be
found here, but beware of offensive content.)
.
and this is the link
http://www.zoundsonline.co.uk/
RAmen
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Wench Nikky Dec 21st, 2006 at 2:10 am
I DID IT AGAIN! Twice now !! Set off ‘Your comment is awaiting moderation’ !!!
3rd time lucky :) maybe
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Just been doing a bit more exploring around Objective Ministeries. That site is a real treasure hunt with lots of real treasure buried there. Did anyone check out :
‘Zounds Youth Rock Ministry’
http://www.objectiveministries.org/zounds/
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Click on the F.A.Q
Isn’t there another band called Zounds?
We have recently learned that a group of British anarchists from the
1970s had formed a punk-rock band called Zounds. (Their website can be
found here, but beware of offensive content.)
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and this is the link
http://www.zoundsonline.co.uk/
RAmen
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Wench Nikky Dec 21st, 2006 at 2:21 am
Wench Nikky Dec 21st, 2006 at 2:10 am
I DID IT AGAIN! Twice now !! Set off ‘Your comment is awaiting moderation’ !!!
3rd time lucky :) maybe
NO NO this site still doesn’t like my links! In a few days all 3 past tries will no doubt come up. Sorry about that. I’ll just put the addresses in this time.
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Just been doing a bit more exploring around Objective Ministeries. That site is a real treasure hunt with lots of real treasure buried there. Did anyone check out :
‘Zounds Youth Rock Ministry’
.
http://www.objectiveministries.org/zounds/
.
Click on the F.A.Q
Isn’t there another band called Zounds?
We have recently learned that a group of British anarchists from the
1970s had formed a punk-rock band called Zounds. (Their website can be
found here, but beware of offensive content.)
.
and this is the address
http://www.zoundsonline.co.uk/
RAmen
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OK, from past experience and now this little episode, it would appear that the server doesn’t like the “http//:”on the links….sometimes!
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@FCC.. It’s kinda scary, but also ridiculously hilarious. Hell, the thing that got me really laughing at that game was the fact that your main enemies are the “Peacekeepers”. .
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Makes you think, doesn’t it?
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What’s more, if you go to the official webpage, there is a complete list of characters and units. We athiests get cool units like secularists, demons and rockstars, (and what appears to be the pope… go figure).
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They get missionaries, and singers that look like the wholesome, nerdy cousin of the BeeGees.
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So far, I know which side I’m supporting…
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What a priceless day on the boards and around the net. It just keeps getting better and better. :)
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‘Now we know how to make the IDists dance in their petticoats: blaspheme.’
http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2006/12/now_we_know_how_to_make_the_id.php
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Ah…I see Jingles has already seen that. :)
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http://www.cnn.com/2006/EDUCATION/12/19/teaching.evolution.ap/index.html
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stop the world. i want off
http://www.cnn.com/2006/EDUCATION/12/19/teaching.evolution.ap/index.html
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sorry about the double post.. i obviously dont know what im doing.
this however worries me, putting a disclaimer on textbooks.
what will they try next?
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@Wench Nikky
“Ah…I see Jingles has already seen that. :)”
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Ummm… what?
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Email from Dembski, on Dawkins site, reguarding the the Blasphemy challenge.
You know!
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Hello Chaps!
Just wanted to know what the FSM’s position on dinosaurs is? I ask, as this is generally the point in which every religion formulated thus far comes un-stuck!
Cheers
Aaron
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@StickerShock
I was just reading about that on a site yesterday. Good to see that article you posted.
Another one of the insidious little exercises in IDiot propaganda and underhanded tactics bites the dust.
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@English Bloke
I’m pretty sure the FSM made some dinosaurs. Maybe one of our expert theologians will post on that. Jingles, do you know anything about FSMs dinosaurs?
RAmen
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This is the funniest thing I’ve EVER seen/heard on the net. I’m literally crying with laughter. Oh, it’s good for the soul : http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-7986664699953384686
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@English Bloke
I know who won the Ashes, if that is any help?
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@moochie
Is it the same guy in all those clips down the side on that page. Just that it looks like him, but he has different clothes on in each one. Maybe that is how he gets bums on seats for sermons?
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I think that dinosaurs came over on the Pirate Ship — the LEMON YELLOW pirate ship, just like all of the animals, two by two.
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@Nikkiee… I’ve honestly never seen that before in my life.
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@English Bloke… The dinosaurs where originally taken aoard the pirate ships as party animals… the hilarity of watching a drunken brachiosaur trying to stand up cannot be overestimated, and I couldn’t even begin to touch upon the bacchanalian delight of watching a Deinchyosaurus (sp?) try and drink from a barrel of rum.
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As such, they were spread around the world by the pirates on the travels, leading to the numerous fossils across the world, with the FSM modifying them to suit whatever environ they decided to settle in.
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Everything was going fine, until one day… the penguins arrived. Led by the original penguin, he who was once a midgit (spelling intentional), they declared war on the pirates, for they were jealous of these decendants of the dwarfs, who got all the really hot strippers.
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Unfortunately, at this stage, it being a friday, the pirates were too drunk to defend themselves, capable only of slurring their words, laughing a lot, and stumbling into each other. So, up stepped the valiant dinosaurs, to defend their piratical booze suppliers.
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It was a titanic battle, meatballs and snowballs filling the air, the vicious awking of the penguins all but drowning out the drunken yo-hoing of the pirates. On that day, many a dinosaur was sent to the great beer volcanoes in the sky, and many a penguin was assigned to swabbing the stripper factory for all eternity.
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.
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When the dust finally settled, the penguins had been repulsed, but at a horrible cost. Every last dinosaur had been fatally wounded. Shedding a tear for his wayward creations, the mighty FSM descended from the heavens.
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Unto the assembled pirates, he spake
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“They Have given Their Lives For You, And So, You Shall Never Forget Their Sacrifice! To Remind You, And Your Children, And Theirs, And So On And Suchforth Throughout All Eternity, I Shall Turn Their Bones Into Everlasting Stone, Even As Their Souls Join With Me In Partaking Of The Beer Volcanoes. Never Forget!”
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And with that final admonishment, he rose back into the heavens, where he and the dinosaurs revel in drunken glory to this very day.
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No, Wench Nikky, there are three or four different preachers. Here’s another guy, almost as funny as the first. http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-3169960823229221817
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pffffffft! Praise the lord.
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I have a couple of things to say. First of all, i finished getting my last degree about exactly one year ago, and since then have vowed to never again read anything with big words. So needless to say i only read the first three sentences of the original post.
@Dr. C. McSomething, i too have spent my accademic career studying psychology. I have even been unfortunate enough to spend my fair share of time paying my dues in a state run psychiatric hospital (Patrick B. Harris Psych Hospital in SC)and as such have seen every sort of mental illness ever diagnosed. It was a well known fact in all the lodges in the hospital (we called “wings” “lodges”, i guess it was more soothing, i dont know) that the hardest patients to deal with are patients with personality disorders. The Laughing Man seems to show signs of mild Narcisistic Personality Disorder (not sure if i spelled that right, i’m too lazy to use spell check). Anyway, he is only 17 and believes himself to be smarter than all of us, and when he stops getting attention on his thread he invades the threads of others. He is constantly a pain in the ass because negative attention is better than no attention in his eyes. Also, unrelated to his personality disorder, you have to factor in the fact that immature little kids will say anything to anybody online because they know there will be no retribution. My hypothesis is that he has no backbone and would not be nearly as rude or insolent face to face for fear of having said face broken. Anyway, it is impossible to make an online diagnosis, but so far he seems to be a nice fit for Narcisistic Personality Disorder.
@laughing man. People have two choices…. either laugh, love, make friends and enjoy life while you have it…. or be a jackass. In your infinate 17 year old wisdom you seem to have chosen the latter of the two. Good luck with that.
RAmen
Dr.Worm
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I used to live with a couple of Indian psychologists who used to accuse me of being a narcissist, but then they also used to accuse me of being an inbred, racist and jewish.
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Of course, they would say that, as they are jealous of my obvious good looks, intelligence and racial superiority due to years of select in-family breeding. (hahaha)
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@Captain Noodulous Silicate TBHNA
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Arrrr! Thanks t’yee kindly, good sir! I’m jest a servant of the noodly appendage tryin’ to touch all those with good taste. I s’pose I can babble as incoherently as the rest of ‘em given the chance.
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R’amen!
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http://www.cnn.com/2006/LAW/12/21/kids.bay.ap/index.html
one down, a world of fanatic loonies left to lock up!
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@MJK
Thanks for the link about Cobb County GA. And way to go PH!!! I have a former high school classmate that works for that law firm.
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@Jingles Dec 21st, 2006 at 9:09 am
‘I’ve honestly never seen that before in my life’ (Perhaps another Aussie on the Dawkins thread then)
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RAmen to your account of the dinosaurs…..You brought a tear to my eye Jingles :’(
I look forward to seeing them again when I ascend to the beer and strippers.
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Re-Oared Marc Dec 21st, 2006 at 8:58 am
‘the LEMON YELLOW pirate ship…….’
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OK ok, the LEMON YELLOW pirate ship then. Bloody hell…!
‘we all live in a LEMON YELLOW pirate ship, a LEMON YELLOW pirate ship, a…..’
RAmen
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err…that’ll be Wench Nikky!
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whench has a better sound to it.
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@ tailkinker41
Your welcome. Glad to be of service. May you be forever touched by His Noodly Appendage.
RAmen
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and more letters!
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On the ship where I was reborn
Our prophet Bobby sailed the sea
And he told us of a tale
Of the God made of spaghetti
So we sailed around the world
Till we found the sea of cheese
And we lived upon the waves
In our Lemon Yellow Galleon
We all live in a Yellow Galleon
Yellow Galleon, Yellow Galleon
We all live on a Yellow Galleon
Yellow Galleon, Yellow Galleon
And our friends all came aboard
Many more of them of foreign shores
And the Church begins to pray….
We all live on a Yellow Galleon
Yellow Galleon, Yellow Galleon
We all live on a Yellow Galleon
Yellow Galleon, Yellow Galleon
On a big plate of spaghetti
Two big meatballs we did see
As we sailed the sea of cheese
On our Lemon Yellow Galleon
We all live on a Yellow Galleon
Yellow Galleon. Yellow Galleon
We all live on a Yellow Galleon
Yellow Galleon, Yellow Galleon
.
RAmen
MJK
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@ StickerShock
http://www.cnn.com/2006/LAW/12/21/kids.bay.ap/index.html
one down, a world of fanatic loonies left to lock up!
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Sorry but I’m afraid it was the kids who suffered. She doesn’t seem to have a conscience or is just plain mental and won’t fess up to it, so she chose the god ploy.
May the childrens souls rest in peace.
RAmen
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hahahaha
Bravo Mad John.
RAmen
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A Yellow Galleon it is then!
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As for StickerShock’s link, I can’t comment on it as words fail me when I read things like that. Too much anger :(
The xtians are always trying to tie evolution onto unacceptable human behaviour, but hypocritically fail to acknowledge the atrocities committed in the name of their ‘lord’.
Xtian religion coerces a woman to have children (after all they need to grow their own victims, don’t they), reguardless of whether she is fit to parent or not.
RAmen
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Speaking of excellent satire as the topic of this thread:
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/links/monologues/18richarddawkins.html
RAmen
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Thanks Wenchy…or Whenchy…or Starchy..or whatever your name is today. ;)
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After having such fun playing with the lyrics for the song, it was quite the downer to read that link. Sadly pathetic hardly describes it.
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RAmen
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Whahahahahahahahaha! Thanks, MJK!!
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Classic… :p
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If Mad John Kidd’s going to use the Beatles… I think I will too.
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“Ahhhhh, look at all the lonely people, Ahhhhh, look at all the lonely people”
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That pretty much sums up all the users on this site… besides me that is of course.
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I’m going off on Christmas Vacation for a week or so… so while I’m gone be sure to leave me a bunch of snot nosed petty comments for me to read on my return so that I can have a good laugh and pity you. Have fun doing whatever it is you people do for your “Holiday” nonsense.
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Just to Note: Just because I’m celebrating Christmas doesn’t mean I’m Christian. I’m still Athiest… I’m just a sucker for free material objects.
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@Mad John Kidd Dec 21st, 2006 at 6:18 pm
‘Speaking of excellent satire as the topic of this thread:
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/links/monologues/18richarddawkins.html‘
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A good link Mad John and kudos for your song :)
RAmen
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Hey there to all the cool Flying Spahetti worshippers. Meself and a few buddies have been following your religion for a a few months and we decided to come even more out of the closet and start an official chapter of the church at our school. So far we have 5 dedicated members. Pastafarians really rock.
RAmen.
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Welcome aboard shipmates. May the wind blow gently at your backs, may the sun shine warmly upon your faces, and may you forever be touched by His Noodly Appendage.
RAmen
MJK
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“Just because I’m celebrating Christmas doesn’t mean I’m Christian. I’m still Athiest… I’m just a sucker for free material objects.” Well, that says a lot about you right there, now doesn’t it?
(There is no way this kid is athiest.)
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Anyway, don’t know how much I’ll be posting this week; happy christmas/chanuka/Holiday/whathaveyou to everyone.
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Happy Holidays to you was well, gill, to you and yours. May you feel His warmth in your gullet. Arrgh!!!
RAmen
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…..and God came down and spoke “let there be free material objects given out by a man in a red suit and white beard to all the really boring hypocrites.â€
TheLaughingboy might be wicked smarter than me but he isn’t very interesting is he.
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@Laugh
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> I’m still Athiest
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Athiest, my ass.
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Merry Christmas my Christian friend.
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Hopefully you will be touched by His noodly appendage over the holidays and come back converted to the one true faith.
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Brother Boyardee
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Laugh, is an ass. Nothing more, nothing less.
To be bothered by it. Other then for the sake of having soming to state on this board is a waste of time. And kinda silly really.
Happy holidays, all! Get your water here… It’s free now til 1/1/07…
Ramen
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@TheLaughingMan Dec 21st, 2006 at 9:43 pm
‘I’m going off on Christmas Vacation for a week or so’
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And we care because…..???
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Happy Holiday Gill, make it a good one. :)
RAmen
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@Argenbert Dec 19th, 2006 at 10:15 pm
“Hey all. i’ve recently stumbled upon pastafarianism by a comment on Dilbert’s Blog. read it on wiki, and now going thru the website. two words:
FUCKING BRILLIANT.
really , congratulations from Argentina, this is hilarius, smart, and quite wisdomy (does that word even exist?) the eight rather’s are quite adecuate, also.
Ramen from a new follower”
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Hi Argenbert, I noticed you slipped on board during a rather busy link spree and don’t appear to have been given a proper Pastafarian welcome.
So welcome to the warm embrace of His Noodleyness and may His Noodley Appendage always navigate your course.
RAmen
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Hi all! Ive been away because I can’t find my way around this place with all the fricken different threads. Tired of leaving amazingly brilliant drunken posts, but not being able to find them the next day!
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Glad to see that TheLaughingLoser has returned to bring holiday joy to everyone!
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Glad to see the wenches prospering (in spite of all the ironing).
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Merry Festivus to all!
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Don’t bother responding because I will never figure out where I posted this, and likely wont figure out how to make my way back here again.
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@Nick TI… ok, I won’t respond :D
i also celebrate Christmas but am ignoring the “real meaning”. Surely this means that I like presents but not christian. As christians have just nicked christmas (as it was a pagan festival) can’t pastafarians just steal christmas?
RAmen
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hehehe -TheLaughingMan Dec 21st, 2006 at 9:47 pm
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What are you getting for consumermas, Little Daffodil? Or do your parents despise you so much? Hope you enjoy your lump of coal! Hell, you’re even too young to get ratted! Maybe you can buy some friends in the New Year.
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Ho, Ho, Ho
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@Alchemist Dec 22nd, 2006 at 5:49 am
‘Maybe you can buy some friends in the New Year.’
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Alchemist, that must feel better. I know you’ve been waiting patiently for TLM to come back. hahahahaha ;)
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Oh Nikky, it was like a good @@@@! Got it out of my system now, thank FSM. A double flush too!
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so, i realise my latest post/link wasnt the best choice, being that that was my second post here ever.
ive been reading this site for a long while and seeing what people consider “gods word” is quite sobering for me.
i too was appalled when i read that article, and wanted to see how this group would respond..
as to the responces i did get, i am glad to see that people paid attention and reacted the same way as I.
My humble appologies if i did offend anyone, that was not my intention.. I needed to know if i could feel comfortable actually participating in this.
So with this post i accept his noodliness into my heart, and hope i too will be accepted.
yours truly,
TooDrunkToComment
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hahahahaha
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@StickerShock
Don’t worry about content of your post/link. As you’ve probably already noticed the most of the threads follow the topic very, very loosely (:).
Welcome to the CoFSM.
RAmen
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TLM is Athiest? As in ‘most athy’?
I don’t know – I’m pretty athy myself. Maybe I’m Athiest. ;p
Strange that he has such a mental block on the word ‘Atheist’ (’e’s just stuck in at random it seems), especially considering how much he likes to cut and paste from dictionary sites…
Also – is it hypocritical for an ‘Aethiest’ [sic] to have a ‘holier than thou’ attitude? lol.
Happy Holidays everyone!
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ty ty ty
and just to add my 2 cents… i think laughingboy is a pre-teen
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@ StickerShock Dec 22nd, 2006 at 6:23 am
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Don’t worry about it. I had a go at a of the hero of the sauce on my first post (J) and gave a sex change to another (Saucy). They forgave me very quickly.
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A last one at Daffodil Boy (TLM) – songs – how about Lithium by Nirvana. Kurt Cobain is a good role model for you! Go on, go on, go on – both barrels! .
PS Daffy, just had a chat to santa and he said that, and I quote …”a brain? He can bollocks! I’ll get him the peep-hole bra and blow-up sheep, sure, but a brain, they’re the mutts nuts them – I don’t give them to scrotes”
So, tough nuts TLM
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Well, he’s certainly got some sort of biochemical hiccup there, anyway.
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Happy Holidays and Merry Pasta (and rum of course) to you too BB :)
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@Alchemist
‘A last one at Daffodil Boy (TLM)’
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haha…you reckon? What are you going to do for a clean out after you loose on Boxing Day?
The fundies will be too busy playing with their materialistic xmas presents, won’t they?
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You guys seriously, what are we gonna do while the Laughing Man is gone? We’re all way to stupid to handle life on our own, without his wisdom our lives are pretty much over. I couldn’t make it to work today cause i forgot how to start my car…. so i just set it on fire instead. Me so stupid. Me so hungry but me not know which hole to put food in. Me need Laughing Man to give my life meaning and direction. But seriouisly, i don’t think any of us are smart enough to post threads or make comments in TLM’s abscence. I think we should completely shut down the site till he comes back. Two weeks without his brilliance….. what are we to do…..
Dr. Worm
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@Alchemist
Well, to let loose after *lose* on Boxing Day, that probably should read. It’s bedtime!
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http://www.time.com/time/world/article/0,8599,1572520,00.html?cnn=yes
Doubt is as much a part of faith as human imperfection is a part of life. We have learned that the hard way in the new millennium — in our politics and in war.
haha, a perfect excuse for many of my decisions!
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@ Dr. Worm
‘Two weeks without his brilliance….. what are we to do…..’
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Whatever it is that nerds do, I suppose. Any suggestions?
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lol Dr.Worm… burn baby burn
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Ah, my good Doctor Worm, how are you dear chap?
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Are these the actual stickers that went on the text books.
http://www.venganza.org/forum/viewtopic.php?p=184416&highlight=#184416
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Nikky – I don’t know what made you think I was a cricket fan (bastards, bastards, buggering bastards). The press are saying that now the pressure is off we might play better (erm – sports, the winning of, the whole point etc)
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You might (coff, coff) be right about it being my last dig at Little Daffodil. A few people have mentioned my inability to “just let it go” and “it’s not important, why are you arguing” – a few people being most ex-girlfriends.
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@Dr Worm. Pissed up fundies over Xmas might be fun, fun, fun.
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@ Wench Nikky. Well first i suggest we form a committee to figure out which hole food goes in, like i said… me so hungry. Secondly, i believe it is important for anyone who cannot figure out how to start their car to set it on fire and yell at it until it works. It will probably only take us a few days to de-evolve into cavemen. When that happens starting our cars will be the least of our problems, we’re gonna have to figure out how to invent the wheel all over again. And all the Wenches better watch out. When me caveman and me get horny, me hit woman in head with big stick and drag back to hole in ground. Then we will need to worry about protecting ourselves… i suggest pointed sticks. They’re pointed…. and they’re sticks…. complicated for a caveman i know, but if we start production now we should have plenty of pointed sticks for the mammoths we will have to kill for food (although i still don’t know what to do with the food when i get it) Then i guess we should figure out some form of government. I guess we could all stand around and hit each other with mammoth bones and the last one standing is the new president. But before the de-evolution happens, and “me get so horny and hit girl with stick”, i would like to go ahead and ask Wench Nikky if she would like to be my “cave wench” until TLM gets back. I ask you this simply because your name sounds hot.
P.S. remember, pointed sticks don’t kill people, stupid cavemen kill people.
Dr. Worm
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@Dr. Worm
a few of your points remind me of the Boomer Bible, not sure if youve read this. It happens to be completley hiarious, so if you havent i suggest you check it out. I beleive it was printed sometime in the early 80’s
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@Dr. worm
Me not know which side of envelop stamp go on for send cards to friend. Me scared of white fluffy pieces of sky falling on head. Me scared of big man in red suit. Me no can deck halls. Me no can fa la la la la. Me hide in cave until Laugh Boy come help.
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what the bloody hell are you all talking about
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Hi Chap. Most of mine were about how Daffodil Boy (TLM) is a pustule on the arse of humanity. Nikky was taking the piss out of me over The Ashes (no doubt Jingles will join in too).
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The “me not know” stuff is also at Little Daffodil – without his guidance we are nothing!
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@Dr. Maglacy Dec 22nd, 2006 at 7:33 am
“Are these the actual stickers that went on the text books.
http://www.venganza.org/forum/viewtopic.php?p=184416&highlight=#184416”
.
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Ha Ha, that was my post over on the forums! I’m KidDirty! But no, those are the joke stickers making fun of the real stickers!
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erm lost post?
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Huh?
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’twas a letter2ted post. ie have a look.
letter2ted.org
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CJYman: Way to say a whole lot of nuttin’. Good thing you cut-n-pasted some quotes from some famous people, because I was getting sick of your rambling. FSM IS the creator of all things (even you). May you be touched by his Noodly Goodness. Hey Nikkiee! How are you?
RAmen
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Hi Maxwell, Achemist, everyone :)
Just been over to Dawkins site reading about the two English professors who agree that the second law of thermodynamics proves evolution is wrong. hahahaha
Richard wrote a good response to their…um…support of YEC ‘theory’.
http://richarddawkins.net/article,453,The-Only-One-in-Step,Richard-Dawkins
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@Nick the Infidel Dec 22nd, 2006 at 1:09 pm
‘Ha Ha, that was my post over on the forums! I’m KidDirty! But no, those are the joke stickers making fun of the real stickers!’
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I saw those on the Discussion Board too and wondered about their authenticity. Let’s face it , it wouldn’t have been surprising if they were the real deal, would it!
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What? Sorry Nikky, I’m trying to convince my parents to get me an EOS 400D for consumermas. Will read the site. BTW do you ever sleep (grin)
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‘BTW do you ever sleep (grin)’
It’s just that all you bloody ‘let’s celebrate the winter solstice on Dec 25′ (in the middle of the Australian summer), have got all your clocks arse about face. It’s 8.30am here!
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By the way, does the Gospel of FSM mention the second law of thermodynamics?
The YECs/IDiots interpret it as one of their supporting arguments.
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Hahaha – It’s 2240 here and I’m doing some serious damage to my second six pack. My schizophrenic friend (no joke) has called me three times to wish me a happy xmas, I suspect he’s stoned.
I bloody well hate this time of year
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Ya, i dont think Einstein and C.S. Lewis new all too much about the flying spaghetti monster. just a thought. but i think it’s a perfectly logical for how excellent spaghetti tastes. mmm. i truly think so. hahaha. maybe my mommy is the spaghetti monster, thats why her spaghetti is the BEST IN THE WORLD!!! OMFG! I kno the spaghetti Monster! Shiznit Sizon
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@Nikky:
The IDiots? Hahahahaha. I have got to remember that ‘un.
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@ Nikky – you have a good one. If you weren’t 12000 km away I’d buy you a beer.
If you’d accept one from a pommie bastard ;)
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I’ve never heard of the Boomer Bible, maybe i’ll check it out
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Here’s an excellent example of quote mining which sounds good initially but in the end provides no actual evidence whatsoever.
http://www.citizenlink.org/FOSI/origins/A000001511.cfm
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Here is a poor excuse for journalism.
http://www.citizenlink.org/fnif/A000003463.cfm
And here is an excellent rebuttal by Ed Brayton. Rebuttal? or should I say a right spanking.