Take a look at some of the hate mail on this site…some people actually have said it ruined their lives because their friends have believed in this stuff, and yes in fact I do know a girl who told me about this, and yes, she does belive in this stuff, with all of her heart. I don’t think that you people take into consideration that not everyone is the brightest crayon in the box and people will believe in anything they’re told..it’s a fact of life. I mean…I’m all for fun and games and joking around…but there really is a point of taking it to far. I mean…come on…look at what you’re doing in your spare time…it kind of depresses me.
-Jacob
Yeah, dude, that sure makes me want to go running back into the hypocritical embrace of the Christian church. It’s almost enough to make me regret the hundreds of gray-matter building hours I’ve spent debating relevant theo-political issues on this site. But not really. I personally have lost a friend over my affilitaion with FSM-ism, and my veiw is that if you are closed-minded enough to relinquish a friendship because you disagree with what people belive, fuck you. I don’t go around telling my Catholic friends to give up Jesus and become an agnostic- that would just be stupid. And, frankly, insulting to my friends, though I find their religion just as ridiculous as you appear to find mine.
~W.A.
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By the way, there is a word for people who blindly do what they are told and belive what is said to them- Fundamentalist Christians. Actually, that’s two words, proving that I’m smarter than the folks you apparently think are being duped by Bobby Henderson.
~W.A.
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RAmen, W.A., Ramen.
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@Jacob:
yes, people sadly will believe what they’re told, often without question. this is why otherwise perfectly sane young men will strap semtex to themselves and commit suicide with the intention of taking as many down with them as possible. it’s the reason why religious fundamentalism is so damned prolific and why arguments from authority cause so much trouble in the world.
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the point of FSM is to show just how absurd the notion of unquestioning belief really is. if people choose to believe this literally, then that’s their problem, but the vast majority of us see FSM for what it is: an ingenius piece of satire, which successfully shows the utter foolishness of belief without evidence. And just to agree with werefox here, the FSM does provie people with a forum for discussion of relevant theophilosophical and political issues. it just does so in a fun way.
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Praise FSM! This brings tears to my oar hole. I love to hear about the salvation of others brought to the bright beacon of our beloved Flying Spaghetti Monster. May they have an eternity of beer and strippers. I am weeping with happiness of this story of a girl’s faith. Bless you. And, Jacob, there is room for you too here under the umbrage of his noodly appendages. Please think about it. But, alas, I do not convert, I pervert.
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Just like my mother used to say – It’s all good fun until someone loses an eye.
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I wonder if your friend actually does believe in this with all her heart or just tells you about it to take the piss out of your humour deficit disorder.
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You fail to take into account the reasoning behind FSMism & its purpose in showing how ridiculous the intelligent design advocates look.
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Seems that you may have a couple of shingles missing from the roof yourself.
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St John the Blasphemist
Saint of Metaphors For Stupidity (a couple of sandwiches short of a picnic, a tree short of a forest, etc)
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Jacob is depressed huh? Find comfort in the embrace of the noodley appendage, rum, fellow scallywags and sailing…poor little jellyfish!
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I’m with Werefox Alchemist (nice name btw) there.
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Jacob. I can’t speak for anyone but myself.
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I don’t think any of the main posters would want you, or anyone, to ‘believe’ in this.
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I truly hope that nobody mistakes this site for a serious religion?
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@Jacob
What do you believe in? Have you lost any friends over your belief. Has what you believe in ever ruined anyones life.
No? Doesn’t sound like you really believe. sounds like you are just following along and mumbling the words. Dig a little deaper brother and show us the love.
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@ Jacob, That breaks my heart dude! About the friend of yours, ruining her life and all that!
That sucks bro! I’m sorry, not! Maybe your friends parent (s) should pay closer mind to her computer usage, at least until she’s old enough to decipher things for herself?
That’s what I suggest anyway.
And oh yeah, could I interest you in some miracle water? It’s on sale at the moment.
Ramen
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“nd yes, she does belive in this stuff, with all of her heart.”
And why shouldn’t someone it is no more stupid than christianity, not that anyone who hasn’t been made up does the fact they think we would beleive someone beleives this is testament to their own stupidity.
and what does btw mean?
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Good link Peter. Er… that miracle water that you have for sale?
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Can it rid me of childish superstitions? Or can I ask Santa for a small Pacific island for my Xmas present?
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@Peter Popoff
Does that miracle water of yours cure stupidity.
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Rodger the cabin boy Dec 7th, 2006 at 4:48 pm
@Peter Popoff
Does that miracle water of yours cure stupidity.
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My miracle water cures EVERYTHING! That’s the miracle of it… I witnessed as it cured poverty in my own backyard… Buy one get six free…
Get your water here…
Ramen
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@Jacob:
You wrote that we don’t “take into consideration that not everyone is the brightest crayon in the box”. Is it really necessary to demand that ideas are made so simple that everyone can get them? It seems like a bit much to ask.
Allow me to explain by way of comparison: Intelligence and the ability to laugh at jokes are but facets of a person, as is the ability to see color. Telling Bobby Henderson to abandon or dumb down the joke is similar to telling Pablo Picasso to paint in black and white so that the colorblind can appreciate the art, or telling Beethoven to make his symphonies have only one note so that the tone deaf can hear it for all it’s worth.
It might be a good idea to post a disclaimer to avoid the very issue that you’re bringing up and to make sure that no one who sees the website gets offended, but it is not in anyone’s place to make the demand.
Furthermore, even if people do take Pastafarianism seriously, is that so terrible? It’s a religion that teaches peace and tolerance and doesn’t try to foist its dogma on others. If people are willing to believe in the FSM, doesn’t that show that they wanted to believe in something? Mightn’t they have believed in another god had the FSM not been there? Overall, I’m not sure that we’re doing much harm.
I do try to keep an open mind, so I will still be listening to your point of view, but I have not yet been persuaded to abandon my own.
-Avatar of Reason
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By the way, Rodger, “btw” means “by the way”.
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@Alchemist Dec 7th, 2006 at 4:27 pm
“I truly hope that nobody mistakes this site for a serious religion?”
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Alchemist, what are you saying? We’ve worked so hart to get CoFSM recognised as a true religion. According to Laughingboy, we seem to have made cult status and so being considered a “real religion” (whatever the hell that is) is surely only a small step away?
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See, back in the days of “survival of the fittest” and Darwinian competition, those who weren’t “the brightest crayon in the box” were simply eaten by something larger. I fully subscribe to this method of population thinning. I really don’t think one should cater to the weak-minded. There are much harder things this girl is going to have to field than satire – like high school for example.
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@OOM
Thank you
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@Avatar of Reason
“to make sure that no one who sees the website gets offended”
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When you visit a site, you have a choice of, going into and exploring the site, or just moving on, I don’t think that is the responsibility of the CoFSM. If a disclaimer is to be posted at our online church, then I would have to request that all sites supporting the christian god do likewise, so as that I am not offended, if I should happen upon such a site.
Fair?
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Nikkiee -re your last post- does that scare you as much as it does me?
/
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@Jacob
“Take a look at some of the hate mail on this site…some people actually have said it ruined their lives…….
……but there really is a point of taking it to far.”
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Let’s see.. does that mean that, if I start writing mail to evangelical sites about how they have ruined peoples lives with their indoctrination of ignorance, they will back off and stop taking it too far?
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Well, truly it is impressive that all of these young folks are here interacting. But, it is also a bit worrisome that some of these kids may not get the joke. But, what the hell, a lot of adults don’t get it either. Stupid is as stupid does. No, wait — I take that back. Humor challenged is as humor challenged does.
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It seems to me that statistically speaking, ANY idea, no matter how outrageous, silly, or whatever, will be totally, unquestionally believed by some, and universally loathed by others… the bell curve works like that.
With that in mind, the vast majority of people will not be harmed in any way, but thanks to the IDEA behind FSMism, hopefully a great number of people will be helped, if only to think just a little bit more about their beliefs before pressing them on others.
In this regard, I don’t think those who would criticize FSMism have a leg to stand on… not without being hypocrites, of course. I mean, Crusades, anyone? If FSMism breaks a few friendships, that’s unfortunate, but hey, at least it won’t start a Holy War somewhere, right?
Anyways, that’s my two cents.
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“some people actually have said it ruined their lives because their friends have believed in this stuff, and yes in fact I do know a girl who told me about this, and yes, she does belive in this stuff”
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So it wasn’t the people who joined FSM that had their lives ruined, but in fact their (presumably) Christian friends that got ruined lives? I submit that the problem was not FSM (which teaches tolerance for other religions), but in fact the other religion (presumably Christianity) which teaches intolerance. That is why the people whos lives were ruined were not the Pastafarians, but the Christians.
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As a pastafarian, I’m glad that this girl chose my religion because it teaches peace and tolerance instead of hate. As an atheist, I’m also glad she chose FSM, because most other religions (like christianity and islam) distort a person’s natural moral values and turn them into immoral people by putting importance on things like faith, bigotry, and celibacy, and reducing the value of real morals like respect and chivalry. If she chooses FSM now, if she later chooses to become an Atheist in the future, her innate morality will still be intact.
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So believe away! It’s much better than the alternatives!
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/she does belive in this stuff, with all of her heart./
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I knew there was something I missed in that post.
I too believe in this stuff, with all of my heart too, also!
Beer volcanoes kick ass! Hey, I think I found the disclaimer, someone wanted.
It’s in the many, many summaries of the CoFSM, it’s that part about the beer volcanoes, and the stripper factories and the pirates!
Damn I’m sharp!
Ramen
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It would if I didn’t think people like laughinboy were the minority or that suggestions such as jacobs were anything but some sort of high moral grandstanding. I know some people will literally believe in anything they are told, but I really see it as pot calling kettle here. Also there are a lot worse things than the CoFSM, that the gullible could be coerced into following. Example, some of the cults mentioned on the RUN!!! thread or an evngelical christian religion!
RAmen
ps must get back over to RUN thread to see if the Kool-Aid has arrived yet ;)
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Jacob,my friend…seriously get a grip.Pastafarianism is an idea,just like art,just like any other religion.By itself an idea is neither good or bad.Experiencing ideas of all kinds is the only way to open the mind and to bring ourselves closer to understanding our fellow man and the universe around us.Humans make ideas good or bad,some people do bad things because they had an idea,while others have bad things done to them because of an idea that they hold dear.But in order to truly understand everything you have to believe that every idea has some intrinsic value,simply because it adds something to us all as people.Even ideas like persecuting people who have a certain set of beliefs can add to us.While they can teach us hate and bigotry they can also teach us patience and love.And let’s face it,if things like hate didn’t exist,would we really value love so much.
That being said…It’s a flying spaghetti monster,all right.While I do believe in the FSM as my god of choice and proudly;anyone who believes in ANY religion,to the point where it ruins their life probably has serious issues beyond believing in the Great Noodly One. If you lost a friend because you believed in the FSM and you didn’t do anything to drive them away,then they obviously weren’t very good friends were they.And if someone isn’t the ‘brightest crayon in the box’,so what?Should we stop the flow of ideas and become as mindless as the computer I’m typing one just because someone might come across an idea that they’re unable to handle.Or perhaps we should lock certain people away where they don’t ever have to come across an idea that might turn them into that isn’t ’society approved’.
The people here like this idea,whether they take it as a serious religion or not.I’m sure we all feel sympathy if something like this has really happened to someone.But you can’t blame the idea for what some people do with it.And you can’t keep people from encountering ideas without taking something very special from them.
Put succintly…it’s not the religions fault,get over it.
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Im confused where is the hate mail hat states that Pastafariansim ruined someone life?
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I’ll take that as a yes then?
>
RAmen
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@ Questioner, Ummm, you just replied to it.
Ramen
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I think jacob may have been referring to rebecca’s ’stolen’ mate. I’ll see if I’ve got a link to the post in “History” tab.
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@Wench Nikkiee:
I was trying to say that, as a gesture of kindness to those who visit the site, it might be okay to put up such a disclaimer, but I was not demanding or even requesting it. I, just like you, neither think that people have the right to demand that they do not get offended, nor do I consider it our problem if they do. I think we both agree, but that I didn’t phrase my point eloquently enough. Sorry for the confusion.
-Avatar of Reason
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‘captured’ not stolen!
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you’re a complete idiot.
http://www.venganza.org/2006/11/29/youre-a-complete-idiot.htm
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Disclaimer……….
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Parents! Watch your children!
Stupid people! Stop breeding! And don’t look at this website!
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Could someone run that by Bobby?
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Sad teenage angst. I remember that. Barely.
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Aargh! Those teenaged years. May FSM strip my memory of them!
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When I hear stories of people actually believing in FSM it makes me want to bang my head against a wall. Allow me to explain why. As I’m sure most of you reading this already know, FSM was created as a satire to mock the teaching of the pseudo-science of intelligent design in schools. Never was it intended to become an actual faith or religion. In fact, this would contradict the very spirit of FSM. There is absolutely no evidence that the world was created by a Flying Spaghetti Monster, just as there is no evidence that the universe was created in seven days by an omnipotent narcissist with an agenda. Granted, absence of evidence is not evidence of absence, but considering that there are much more logicaly sound theories of how the earth came to be, it becomes obvious that neither the Flying Spaghetti Monster, nor the narcissist exist.
The point is this: Actually believing in FSM is as idiotic as believing in any other religion that requires blind faith and answers questions with more questions and eventually burns you at the stake for being a witch. One can adhere to the ideals of FSM: peace, love, beer, etc., but as soon as people start truly believing that they someday will actually be touched by a noodly appendage, they begin a downward spiral towards the same fundamentalism present in Christianity and Islam. Besides, a flying spaghetti monster? You’d have to be retarded to believe that!
RAmen,
Optimus Prime
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@Avatar of Reason
No need for an appology. I enjoy your posts immensely as they are well written and well thought. :)
My post wasn’t so much at you, as it was at the concept generally. Your post just reminded me of how the christian types (all pious religious types) expect a separate set of rules to pertain to them.
RAmen.
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Optimus Prime, I am saddened and depressed by your post. Really, really depressed. How many crayons do you have to swallow before this horrible depressing life on this barren planet ceases? I will deem to find out.
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Optimus Prime Dec 7th, 2006 at 5:56 pm
” but as soon as people start truly believing that they someday will actually be touched by a noodly appendage, they begin a downward spiral towards the same fundamentalism present in Christianity and Islam. Besides, a flying spaghetti monster? You’d have to be retarded to believe that!”
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Hey, if I wasn’t retarded, I’d take offense to that!
Want to buy some water?
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@Optimus Prime
“Actually believing in FSM is as idiotic as believing in any other religion that requires blind faith”
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Maybe, but believing in The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster isn’t.
RAmen
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@Wench Nikkiee:
I’m very glad you like my posts. I have not been posting here for very long, although I have been coming to the site regularly to watch you all bashing fundamentalists’ ill-thought arguments. I vicariously enjoyed it and hope to get to bash them myself in the future.
-Avatar of Reason
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@ Optimus Prime -
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Don’t worry, I read your post the right way. Yes – may it never become a cult.
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@Optimus Prime
Besides, a flying spaghetti monster? You’d have to be retarded to believe that!
RAmen.
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Re: One Oared Marc Dec 7th, 2006 at 6:00 pm
“Optimus Prime, I am saddened and depressed by your post.”
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Oops, now some of our own fundies have taken your post to heart ;)
Please be gentle on/with them.
RAmen
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Oh, and Jacob, we’re the really cool people that you aren’t allowed to hang out with in high school. And yes, Johnny C, that is an atheistic holier than thou statement.
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@Avatar of Reason
I haven’t really read many of your posts? I don’t think anyway?
But if Nikkiee says your Ok, I’ll give you a pass this time.
However, there is no need for a “disclaimer” on this website.
My thought is this; as I’ve already stated, if you don’t know what your getting into, when you come to this site. Then you shoudn’t be here, and you should leave.
Much like I don’t know how to fly a jet, I won’t try to fly a jet.
Ramen
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Just to chip in, I reckons ZzzDJ got it bang on right (Dec 7th, 2006 at 5:24 pm).
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If you’re worried that there are millions of people believing various nonsensical things, but aware that that there are some things so mad that no one believes them, then the way to point out the problem is to try to fill in the rungs on the ladder between the two. For a large number of people, the FSM is daft enough to be impossible to believe in*, but similar enough to existing religions to point out their daftness. So, for lots of people, the FSM forms part of a helpful thought-based antidote to religion.
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Sure, some people were already sceptical enough to be many rungs higher up than the FSM (many of them are here, playing along to help out the whole enterprise). But others, I suppose, may be a few rungs further down in the real depths of credulity where even the Invisible Pink Unicorn looks like something worth a few prayers on a Sunday morning.
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The FSM will help a lot of people of somewhere around average credulity to question bollocks faiths. There’ll be some people whom it won’t help. That doesn’t mean you blame the FSM, any more than you’d blame an exam paper for the failure of a small number of people to pass it. Maybe those people would have been better off on a simpler exam paper – and maybe your friend, Jacob, needs something even more mind-bogglingly impossible than the FSM to prick their scepticism gland. (Try the infamous orbital teacup. Or try to convince them that you yourself are omniscient. Bet that’ll do it.)
.
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*Pastafarians, I will flagellate with penne** as penne-ance, I promise ye.
**Y’up for that, Penne?
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screw that…in my spare time i masterbate…. i mean in this religion it’s allowed!!!
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wait a second… so the fsm is just satire? there’s really no monster? i’m ruined!
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@tha beast from tha east,
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’so the fsm is just satire? there’s really no monster?’
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No, no, no! Of *course* there’s an FSM! Why else would we be here, Jim Lad? ‘Tis all true, to the tiniest noodle. (Don’t let scare-mongering tales of masturbation put ye off. As if they would. (BTW: @ God? Pasta? what has more letters? – Nice to hear you’ve got a hobby, anyway. Should build up your cutlass arm, at least.))
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RAmen
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WHAAT? SATIRE??
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
/sarcasm
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If lives were truly being “ruined” by this “cult,” why is there not one news story anywhere pointing to a specific example? All you have are vague allusions to anonymous people who have had their lives ruined.
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I suggest that no one’s life has been ruined by FSM. The people who post that their friends believe in this whole-heartedly are making up stories to hurt FSM. Someone please prove me wrong and point me to a concrete example with a name.
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Leaving aside social control… the purpose of religion is (in my view) organisation of the worship of “something” with a view to joining that “something” after death in a great hereafter (heaven). Christians say that man was created in God’s image…but people come in different “images”… therefore should I feel like a second class citizen of heaven if I get to heaven and God turns out to be an asian female/black male/a kiwi (heaven forbid)/amazon tribesman etc (something not exactly like me)…Heaven by definition must be subjective (how could any two people have the same heaven) and therefore should I perish believing that I shall see the FSM then why should I not expect to see the FSM and be embraced by the noodley appendage…The FSM is as real as anything else…God may well also be a giant scarlet jelly bean but the FSM is way cooler…where’s my pirating outfit!!!
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What’s so hard to believe about an extraterrestrial teapot?
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I mean, I was messing around with a new method of highspeed pasta delivery the other day and managed to get a entire dinner set for 8, along with a pasta tureen and garlic bread holder, into the high stratosphere at least.
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Also, do not worry about our satirical god. He is all-knowing, all-powerful, and all-tasty. Hence, it is within his power to be BOTH satire and truth, and feed a family of 6 and a bit billion on the side (with individual choices of pasta types, alcoholic beverages and garlicky breads).
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@Peter Popoff
As I said to Wench Nikkiee, I was never saying that we actually needed a disclaimer. I may not have been clear, but what I was trying to say is that such a disclaimer would be done if and only if we wanted one (out of our own politeness and kind-hearted desires to not hurt people’s feelings), and that one shouldn’t be put up just because random people make demands. I was trying to be courteous and acknowledge the points made by Jacob, but to say that no one has the right to demand not to be offended by anything the encounter on the internet.
-Avatar of Reason
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And just to add to what old Jingles is saying…he also…in his wisdom promotes pirates…
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I love my mommie!!!
Anybody want to buy some water…
It’s on sale this week…
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Old… me? Never! Heresy!
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Prematurely senile… maybe, but not old.
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FSM is more brilliant than eating babies.
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A Pastafarian who calls FSMism satire is like a Christian who only goes to church on Christmas and Easter. I pity your poor lost soul. You will never drink from the volcano. You will never see the stripper factory. You will never eat the meatball. May the FSM touch you with his noodly appendage and clear the darkness from your eyes.
RAmen
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@Jingles
‘He is all-knowing, all-powerful, and all-tasty. Hence, it is within his power to be BOTH satire and truth, and feed a family of 6 and a bit billion on the side’
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RAmen Jingles
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@ Italian Plumber – well said.
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@ General Rotelle
So how many ounces of water should I put you down for?
We’ve got water… Beer flavored water… Miracle water…
Get your water here…
Ramen
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And your religion is better because it is… more baised in fact??? pastafarianism encourages intelligent thought and debate wich is more than i can say for your email.
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@Peter
Water is for infidels.
I only drink beer. Weissen for breakfast, lager for lunch, porter for dinner. The Trinity.
RAmen
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Enough to drown your scurvy hide in…
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@ General Rotelle,
That’s a shame you feel that way! I am a hardcore Labatts drinker myself.
But me water is on sale… it is miracle water… And I’m bored to death, waiting for the hardcore fundies to come about.
Probably this weekend, they’ll show! They will!
Meantime: Water for sale… Get your Jesus water here…
Ramen
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May I make this statement again. I know this thing is a satire… you guys know that this thing is a satire. So why not just say that it’s a satire already? Even though this kid’s friend does seem to be a bit… daft, it’s still a good story to bring up the obvious… telling everybody that FSM is but one big farce. “Anything that comes across as humor or satire is purely coincidental.” Change it and stop being nerdy little kids on a mission to fix religion. You never will. For every one person like this kid’s friend who has brainwashed by FSMism, there are a million people who have been brainwashed by the Christians and Catholics. You can’t ever change them, you won’t even make a dent. That being said all this site really does is provide a forum for nerdy little kids to go around thinking that they’re cool because they believe an FSM made the world. People are getting hurt now apparently… and as you guys have claimed before “nobody has ever been hurt by FSM”. FSMism is already going down the path of bloodshed and destruction. Stop it… stop it now. Change the phrase to read “FSM is a farce” and be done with it before you do more bad than good. My heart goes out to you Jacob, since I’m the only one around here apparently willing to show some compassion. How ironic it is that the Athiest is the one to have a heart.
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The whole thing is making me very depressed. I’m glad I don’t suffer from Humor Deficit Disorder or I’d have to just hang it up. As it is, I’m going to laugh a little less heartily at the ridiculous things people have to say about Pastafarianism. Not much, but a little, just for a while.
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@TheLaughingMan
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Yawn……
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@TheLaughingMan
‘FSMism is already going down the path of bloodshed and destruction. Stop it… stop it now. Stop it… stop it now.’
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Mind you it is funny being told that by a 17yo with a half a brain.
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TheLaughingMan Dec 7th, 2006 at 8:25 pm
May I make this statement again/
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I’m bored, so Ok, I’ll make this statement again…
If you don’t know what your into, when you are at the FSM, Then leave!
It’s that whole, I can’t fly a jet thing.
Get it? Got it? Leave!
Thank you
Ramen
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Brag to all your friends about having your name on top of a Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster website thread do you?
RAmen
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Hey Jacob and LaughingMan,
Seeing that you’re so keen to satire, here’s some more for you:
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/
I’m anxious to hear your thoughts about it. (Oh, and be sure to check out the hate mail section while you’re there.)
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WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS GAY ASS WEBSITE!!??!?!?!? I JUST WANT U GUYS TO KNOW UR ALL FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIVES THAT ARE GOIN TO HELL !!!IF I EVER SEE U IN PERSON AND SOMEONE SAY FSM I WOULD PUNCH THEM RIGHT IN THE FACE…YOU KNOW UR GOIN TO HELL U DUMBASSES …I HOPE U HAVE A FUCKED UP LIVE IF U WORSJIP OR WHATEVER THE HELL U NERD STAT TRECK GEEKS DO ON THIS FAGGIT ASS WEBSITE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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About this ‘cult’ thing… I heard a good saying once, that I think applies here. It went something like, “religions are just cults with more members.” This is true. One could also say that religions are just mythologies that never went out of style- they were all created for the same reason. People have a pathological need to believe in life after death, and a benevolent creator that will take care of us once we are gone. In my mind, Catholic preists are just children who never moved out of their mother’s house: they perpetually need that sense of security and love to get by. Or are just too lazy to get a real job.
.
Personally, if this is a cult, I’m happy to belong to it. At least OUR cult doesn’t glorify death, or support mass suicides. Or wars. Have you ever heard of a Pastafarian holy war? I think not.
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RAmen,
~W.A.
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@WTF-
And the same to you, friend. We are all brothers here, and I shall be happy to… ah, what was it? “PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE” if ever I saw you. Karma, dear WTF. Karma.
RAmen, and peace be with you.
~W.A.
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@ Wench Nikkiee,
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I hear you. I often laugh right out loud reading things here. People say the darndest things. It is an endless source of amusement. I say that if people don’t like it, don’t come here.
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‘nerdy little kids to go around thinking that they’re cool’
Sounds just like you laughing boy! Your sanctimonious waffle, gets mind numbingly boring very quickly.
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@WTF
Get fucked Princess!
RAmen, and peace be with you.
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Check it out, if you click on WTF’s name, you can see the URL he typed in… That’s hilarious! It’s like he was so pissed off he started typing in the wrong box!
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I do feel the tiniest little bit of pity towards this laughingboy though, as he appears to be awfully desperate for some attention.
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My bad, he actually put a .com on it. It looks like he actually did put “fuckyounerds.com” as the URL. Wow. I wonder if he did that in caps too?
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@WTF
Release the caps lock child…..caps lock!
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@LaughingMan.
You know what’s a farce? The Constitution of the United States of America is a farce if separation of church and state is not upheld. Can you say religious freedom? I knew that you could. Oh, you’re too young, to get the reference there. Sorry. You have to pick your battles, son. We can believe whatever we want to believe. I believe that Intelligent Design should not be taught as science in public schools. If steadfastly saying I sincerely believe that I’ve been divinely touched by an invisible pasta dish is what needs to happen, so be it. Also, I am bothered/amused by people who say, for instance, that lenticular cloud formations are really alien spaceships. I’ve happened upon some websites claiming just that, and, because I know I will not convince them otherwise, I just laugh and leave them behind with a click of the mouse. It would be folly to post to their blogs (if they have them) that they need to retract their claims because some people are believing them. Let them believe, I say. It’s not my problem.
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Excellent SaucyWench. A big RAmen and an extra male stripper…..to your liking of course…in the afterlife.
RAmen
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One more post to laughingboy.
Laughingboy, there is some free Kool-Aid going over on the ‘RUN!!!’ thread, if you are interested.
RAmen
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@WTF
You wrote: “IF I EVER SEE U IN PERSON AND SOMEONE SAY FSM I WOULD PUNCH THEM RIGHT IN THE FACE…”
You’re going to punch us in the face? Not only are you an incompetent user of the English language, but you also don’t appear to understand how to defend your pacifist god. If you want to be a good Christian, you should obey his rule “Judge not, lest you be judged yourself.”
You also wrote: “I HOPE U HAVE A FUCKED UP LIVE”, which presumably means, “I hope you live a fucked up life.” Didn’t Jesus council his followers in the Sermon on the Mount to love their foes and pray for their enemies?
I hope you live a content and happy life, and that you stop posting hate in the name of your loving God.
-Avatar of Reason
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So I have temporarily changed my handle to something a little more trendy. Seems like everyone’s using it- the ‘wench’ bit, I mean. Don’t really know why, unless it gives you a little more ‘pull’ around here. I’ll try anything once.
I am saddened by the hate mail we get in this joint. It is either really low grade bait, or just really low grade effort from the fringe. Do I have to make up my own hate mail for us to respond to? I guarantee that it would be one helluva lot more credible and substantive than the crap we look forward to now. All in favor? Fuck it- carry the motion!
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Whatever happened to the guy with the oar?
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When I read that oar/ass hate mail, I distinctly remember spitting beer out my nose.
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@WTF:
I refer you to Matthew: 5: 43-44 and Matthew: 7: 1.
-Avatar of Reason
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@ Sister-wench *ankla1.com – I was Captain Saucy for a while, but I went back to SaucyWench because it was more fun, and well, wenches are welcome here. Some could say that we’re degrading ourselves, but I don’t take it that way. It’s all a big piratey puzzle, and wenches have a very valued place. Now that you’ve embraced your inner wench, you can hurl unladylike insults at any rapscallion who dares to attempt to rock your boat.
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Rock-n-roll!, SaucyWench- I am not too very worried about the rat-scallops so much. I’m a big fuckin’ wench as it turns out. With a shaved piratey head and gnarly goatee. But I am a wench just the same. Is there a local, or do we represent ourselves in all ‘ho’ matters? Yohoho matters, that is. Texas ‘t’, swimmin’ pools and movie stars, dammit! I’m Gumby! Gumby-Wench. Man I’m confused.
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Excelent post SaucyWench.
SaucyWench Dec 7th, 2006 at 9:05 pm
@LaughingMan.
You know what’s a farce? The Constitution of the United States of America is a farce if separation of church and state is not upheld. Can you say religious freedom? I knew that you could.
You hit the center of the bulls-eye.
P.S. Wenches should stick together like two peices of posta in a pot.
Have a good night and RAmen brothers and sisters!!
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Pirate wenches rock!
RAmen
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I want to be called Loretta. Tell me who said that, if you dare!
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To all Wench’s…
I was Swabbies Bucket, But “Peter Popoff” just kind of “pops”!
And gives me an instant edge on the fundies, I so love to hate!
Anyway, I’m to drunken to post anymores tonite! So I say to thee,
Buy my miracle water… it’s on sale now… get some while the gettin’s good!
And goodnite!
Ramen
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@ Gumby-Wench. Wow, what a strange series of visuals your post dragged me through. I think I need to sit down and have some ale after that one. Shiver me timbers!
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@ Popoff- I stuck up for you, bud. I thought it was pretty damn funny.
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Ale is just the thing. If ye timbers doan sheever, day be needin’ more ale, I do spose.
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@Peter Popoff Dec 7th, 2006 at 9:57 pm
“..To all Wench’s…
I was Swabbies Bucket, But “Peter Popoffâ€
.
Peter, I would never have known ;)
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@ everyone supporting a fulfilling wenchhood – thank you.
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http://www.wulffmorgenthaler.com/default.aspx?id=69bc035c-8062-487a-8431-9c18ad9a7cc9
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@Wench*ankla1.com
Welcome to wenchdom ankla 1
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@Wench*ankla1.com
‘Is there a local, or do we represent ourselves in all ‘ho’ matters? Yohoho matters, that is. Texas ‘t’, swimmin’ pools and movie stars, dammit! I’m Gumby! Gumby-Wench. Man I’m confused.’
.
You reckon your confused!
@SaucyWench
I’m making mine a bourbon Saucy.
RAmen
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@enjoy
That’s great, I give it a bookmark.
RAmen
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She said… Yohoho!
Hahahahahahaha.
Peace, Love,
Goodnight,
Ramen
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@enjoy
There is another one at that site, I think may be relevent to some of our visitors
http://www.wulffmorgenthaler.com/default.aspx?id=5aef723a-1390-4fc5-8684-5cd9aed99f4e
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Again love the cartoons
RAmen
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It’s not our fault people are sarcasm-deprived and have no idea what it is.
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Wow, this has been quite the business today. Been stuck in the historical archives all day and look at what I missed. I feel let down though. Somehow, oars up the arse and assclowns buring in hell carry so much more weight. I see the HDD outbreak is still flaring up and someone is refusing to take their medication. Shame, shame.
RAmen
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@LaughingMan
A-the-ist!!! Please, please, you’re killing me enough already with your bad spelling and your bad brain. Just say it: a-the-ist. Atheist.
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I’m still trying to figure out how we can help those with Humour Deficit Disorder, Mad John.
Obviously using humour/satire is no good because they don’t recognise it.
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@Hetzle Dec 7th, 2006 at 10:44 pm
‘It’s not our fault people are sarcasm-deprived and have no idea what it is.’
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Ah…I was pretty much repeating your post Hetzle….sorry I had missed it.
RAmen
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Yes, Jacob is depressed at our wasting of our time and yet he contiunes to waste his own time by coming into Our Church and pissing on our parade. Oh the irony.
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@TheLaughingMan Dec 7th, 2006 at 8:25 pm
‘People are getting hurt now apparently… and as you guys have claimed before “nobody has ever been hurt by FSMâ€. FSMism is already going down the path of bloodshed and destruction. Stop it… stop it now. Change the phrase to read “FSM is a farce†and be done with it before you do more bad than good.’
.
All hail the Flying Spaghetti Monster, the one true god, whose message is peace, not bloodshed as this fundie claims!
RAmen
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Yay… more blind, idiotic hate mail!
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WTF, you have given us all hope, we thought we had seen the last of you burn-in-hellers, but nope, you guys just keep marching on in.
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Also, good to see another wench on board. I think I’m going to call you Gumby wench though… its easier to handle than wench*ankla1.com.
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In other news… drinking two pints of Toohey’s Extra Dry instead of having lunch is fun…
.
.
Jingles
(Tipsy with bells on)
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Thanks Jingles, I missed the WTF post. Now that’s more like it.
Cheers, mate.
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@one oared marc
BTW is the dutch version of VAT (value added tax).
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St John the Blasphemist,
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“Just like my mother used to say – It’s all good fun until someone loses an eye.”
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Oh, sure, NOW you tell me!
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OEJ
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Wench*ankla1.com,
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“I want to be called Loretta. Tell me who said that, if you dare!”
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That’s from The Life of Brian. Do I win a prize? Perhaps a king geek pocket protector?
.
OEJ
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OEJ,
Of course it’s fun till some lubber loses an eye – how else to they get to wear a patch?
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then it’s even more fun
aaarrrghhhhh.
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Thanks OEJ, The Life of Brian. I knew it sounded familiar, just couldn’t place it.
RAmen
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Okay, I am new here, but unless I have totally misunderstood everything I read on this site, believing in FSM means believing that Science and Faith are two separate things and that Faith must not be taught as Science in school. And believing this whatever my actual faith may be.
So, if I catch your drift, you are saying that this girl you know lost a friend because this friend was so narrow-minded and inflexible, that he/she would sacrifice the friendship rather than tolerate that this girl is advocating a separation of Faith and Science. That right? In this case, I have to say my heart is not exactly breaking on this friends’ behalf…
In Germany (my homecountry) most people are Christians. however, I have met exactly one person here who could be called a creationist. Everybody else accepts evolution as a well validated scientific theory, Christian or not.
And actually, even the catholic church itself officially accepts evolution as thus. Because not doing so is frankly ridiculous. It would be like still claiming that the earth is flat and the sun turns around it (which it isn’t and doesn’t, in case you were wondering!).
And frankly, I never have been able to understand, why I can’t accept that evolution happens, even though I do believe in God. Sorry.
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There’s plenty of scientists been tortured by religion for claiming the earth is round and went round the sun! but then again you’re dealing with an organisation which would rather see the spread of AIDS than accept contraception. Not the most proactive forward thinking bunch lead by a Hitler youth…
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Belief is a strange thing to lose friends over. It’s an even stranger thing to get upset about. Money! Now there’s a compelling reason to lose – or indeed make – friends. I guess it’s all about perspective. And since no one has seen them, no one in my local pub anyway, there really isn’t any reason to say one deity is better than the other, or even exists. Unless of course, one deity promises beer and strippers.
RAmen
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Good one Boarg.
Though I wonder how many Christina Fundamentalists have The Byrds – Christian Life as their favourite song, without realising what happened to its writer.
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@ TheLaughingMan (Dec 7th, 2006 at 8:25 pm)
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‘why not just say that it’s a satire already?’
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It’s been said, many times. It’s described as a satire on other sites. It’s full of sneaky, sideways, humorous indications that it’s a satire. What do you want? The website to be changed to ‘The Satire of the Flying Spaghetti Monster’? Just wouldn’t be such a good satire in that case, would it? Jonathan Swift wouldn’t have made such an impression if he’d written:
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‘A Modest Proposal: For Preventing the Children of Poor People in Ireland from Being a Burden to Their Parents or Country, and for Making Them Beneficial to the Publick (By the way, I’m only joking)’.
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Good satire gets the reader to work it out for him/herself. It gets people thinking, in other words, which I regard as performing a public service. Some people don’t understand some satire, just like some people don’t get some jokes. Should we stop telling jokes?
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(By the way, if Jacob’s friend is really a committed believer, surely they read these forum threads. I’d have thought conversations like this would more or less give the game away.)
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’stop being nerdy little kids on a mission to fix religion. You never will.’
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What a faint heart! 2,100 years ago, nobody had heard of Cheeses Kites, but today you could support a reasonable economy on small gold crosses alone. Sure, the FSM alone isn’t going to take on several billion believers and win, but it’s just one part of a much, much bigger, growing movement. A single protester might not achieve much, but a march of millions is made up of single protesters. (And don’t forget this guy: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Tianasquare.jpg)
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‘FSMism is already going down the path of bloodshed and destruction.’
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No, it isn’t. Have some pasta, dear boy.
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‘How ironic it is that the Athiest is the one to have a heart.’
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Why is that ironic? It might seem ironic to a bunch of blinkered fundamentalist theists, but you’re in good company here. The only irony I can see here is that you should say anything that might perpetuate that old anti-atheistic stereotype, whilst actually believing that you’re the only atheist posting here…
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@spider:
I’m sorry, are you suggesting that German equals Nazi?
If so:
1) this is not the case
2) I do feel personally insulted by this suggestion.
this is just one of a few more things that do not automatically equal. Just for your information:
German does not equal Nazi
American does not equal bigot, or moron (see, there is a stereotype for everyone…)
Christian does not equal fundamentalist
neither does Moslem. Or any other religion.
I could continue this list, but I suppose you get my drift…
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Jon E.
You sent me off to find out what happened (I shamefully admit it wasn’t something I knew already). Your question would be a fascinating one to have an answer to (or the reaction to the answer would be fascinating). The future not being set, safe and rosy for anyone, regardless of belief, is only tragic if the spice of life isn’t what you seek, or the “human condition” doesn’t fascinate you. A pity to miss out on such natural stimulants. I know it sucks sometimes, but sometimes it doesn’t.
I ramble, I’ll stop.
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@ Kysyra,
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In case Spider’s asleep right now, I’ll presumptuously butt in. (Sorry if I do you an injustice, Spider.) Look up Pope Benedict XVI on Wikipedia and you’ll find the following:
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‘Following his fourteenth birthday in 1941, Ratzinger was enrolled in the Hitler Youth…’
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Sure, it goes on to say that he wasn’t very committed and his father was ‘a bitter enemy of Nazism, believing it conflicted with the Catholic faith’. But if it was Spider’s ‘Hitler youth’ comment that (understandably) caught your attention, then I’m afraid it’s a matter of common public knowledge. (Mind, being an unenthusiastic Hitler Youth in the ’40s is, for my money, neither here nor there, compared with witholding contraception in an AIDS-ravaged, poverty stricken continent.)
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I’m sure Spider gets your drift and agrees with it, as will virtually everybody here. FSM isn’t about labelling and persecuting people (except possibly ninjas). That, after all, was one of the least charming characteristics of Nazism.
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Gram Parsons was a great song writer and I really do like The Byrds – Sweetheart Of The Roadeo album. I just have problems with a song that tells you to get rid of any friends who don’t agree with you about religion, particularly one writen by someone who didn’t really take his own advice. I could have been taking that song the wrong way and he could have been being sarcastic about some christians he knew, but it never sounded that way to me and I’m fairly sure I’ve come across christians who do take it seriously.
Yep I can ramble as well.
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@J, Also Ratzenberger was responsible for covering cases of child abuse within the priesthood under his predecessor. He was head of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, formerly know as the Inquisition.
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@J:
Actually, there are about a dozen things that trouble me more about Ratzinger than him having been enrolled at 14. There is the contraception issue, there is the polemic against Harry Potter, there is the increased number of exorcists being trained… whatever.
The point is, if you define Ratzinger by having been a Hitler youth, you are back to every German being a Nazi (at least those who were alive back then), because you had no choice.
I have read a number of Spider’s posts by now and don’t really think he wanted to be insulting.
However, some of you guys maybe could try and watch your own statements as well as those of the “others”, and remember your own tolerance. I think it would be a shame if this great site got spoiled by your own crowd becoming as mean as those who flame you!
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oh, and the fact that Ratzinger’s goal even as a child was to become a cardinal (as opposed to just a priest). Now that I always thought really scary!
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@kysyra – I absolutely agree.
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@kysyra and Jon E – golly gosh, Pappa Razzi just gets better and better.
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@kysyra again – ‘Ratzinger’s goal even as a child was to become a cardinal’
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Now *that* I can sympathise with! Cardinals get great outfits, everyone calls them something like ‘Your eminence’ and treats them with awe and respect, and there’s something just ever so slightly frightening about them. Who *wouldn’t* want to be a Cardinal? It’s barely a step down from Darth Vader!
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@J
*g* except that Anakin wasn’t dreaming of being Darth Vader as a child!
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Well, Anakin always struck me as rather a dull child.
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Anyway, everyone knows that, irresepective of Cardinals and Sith Lords, the only role models worth having are Pirates. Yarrrrr!
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Ye’re right there, matey!
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I am impressed, OEJ. Unfortunately there are few who can name that movie. I think it is a classic. There are too many Python quotes hiding in the dark corners of my mind, waiting to pop up and cause pause. You are good, my friend, but do you know the origin of this: “It’s a jelly.” This one has Max Von Sydow, strangely enough.
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Wait a sec….isn’t Christianity satire? It is just so humorous.
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Wench*ankla1.com
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Strange Brew.
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I admit, I had to use the web to find that one. It’s been close to 20 years since I saw that… eh! .-)
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Here’s one for you. “It’s good to be the king.” That one should be easy. .-)
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OEJ
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@wench*ankla1.com
wasn’ that MIB?
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Ahoy all,
sorry wasn’t asleep was out being piratical on 2 wheels – thanks for people answering the q’s from my post. you beat me to the answer! i would like to say i’m sorry of you felt offended by my post but it would be a lie so i won’t say it. the catholic church is run by someone who was a member of the nazi party. how fu**** up is that?
.
To answer your other points, at NO point did i suggest german=nazi, that was a conclusion i simply did not jump to. There are some, same as there are British, American, French, (and any other nation you care to mention) bigots who follow those ideals. i did not even draw attention to the fact the Pope is German as i felt it irrelevant.
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I did not accuse any single nation in fact of anything, i do accuse all religions everywhere of being based on falsehood, ie; the world/universe was created by some form of supreme being. I refuse to accept that religion should be expempt from criticism or critique. If they are so fragile so as to require protection from questioning then it only proves they are hiding something. This sheltering of religion from questioning only helps foster extremism and the belief that they are right, which by implication means everyone else is wrong, so that if a single tenet of the faith fails to be true then the rest of it inevitably crumbles. this in turns leads to hysterical protection of every facet of faith, no matter how absurd or ridiculous.
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so, to conclude Kysyra,
if you find the fact that the pope was a hitler youth offending, well tough really, take it up with him, he did it not me.
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If you find the sterotyping of nations offending. Good. Thats why i didn’t do it
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If you find my criticism of religion that has no regard for evidential support (all forms, everywhere, ever) then double tough. I’m not apologising, yah boo sucks with a cherry on top.
.
please read what people put before getting offended in future
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If it was MIB then I am SOL. I have heard that line, and not just from Tom Petty. I will rack my little old mind and see what shakes loose.
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Aha! Mel Brooks.
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okay, MIB was “it’s a squid!”
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@spider
“so, to conclude Kysyra,
if you find the fact that the pope was a hitler youth offending, well tough really, take it up with him, he did it not me.”
Ehm, my whole point was actually that this is the one thing about this guy not really worth bitching about. If you were a german kid at that time you were enrolled. Period. This is the one thing saying nothing about Ratzinger’s character. Bitching about him for this is basically saying “all germans (or at least all that were alive back then) are Nazis.
Why don’t you dis him for the things he actually does, like protecting abusers, training exorcists and so on? There is enough to get mad about!
I’m actually neither sure if you really read my first post, nor why you are being this rude.
The point of my first post was to mention that being a catholic does not in itself mean being a fundamentalist, or loving Ratzinger or (among the young ones) even listening much of what he says. That you can believe in something without slavishly following some power hungry old man. Without being dogmatic or fundamentalist. And without rejecting all that we know about the world today and instead living in some crazy make-believe world in which ID is called science.
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#1: Well, morons out of the gene pool == good.
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“I don’t think that you people take into consideration that not everyone is the brightest crayon in the box and people will believe in anything they’re told”
Dear Peter,
If we were to stop talking simply because someone, somewhere might misunderstand, all mankind would be entirely silent. There are thousands of beliefs in the world. Are you railing against everyone who believes differently than you do? Do something constructive and start your own Web site that proclaims your humorless beliefs.
“I mean…come on…look at what you’re doing in your spare time…it kind of depresses me.”
Don’t bother being depressed about what other people are doing, live your own life to the best of your ability. If you don’t want the stripper factory and beer volcano, that’s your business. I won’t be depressed on your account – don’t waste your time being depressed on mine.
Arg Sayer
Is there a sing-along Ravioli Chorus somewhere?
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Enjoy !! :-)
Kissing Hank’s Ass
http://www.jhuger.com/kisshank.php
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This is tame compared to http://www.christonthecrapper.com
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@Wench*ankla1.com
Mel Brook’s “History of the World part 1″
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@ Exterminator- Oh my. I couldn’t listen for very long. I’m going to have nightmares about living in a ‘nation of sodomizing fools.’ I bet this guy’s one of them. Methinks he doth protest too much!
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“All I want to do is eat your brains…” Bloody hilarious!!! Reminds me of certain “friends of the church”.
http://scienceblogs.com/mixingmemory/2006/12/re_your_brains.php
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Hell fire MJK, which church was that?
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Alchemist, I was referring to the mentality of certain “visitors” to Our Church. Sorry, I was a bit vague.
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Well your point is a valid on there are alot of people out there without the mental capacity to live without religion and in the real world. I just hope you sent the same email to all the other recognised religions
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MJK – I was being sarcastic. Never worry about being vague, I live that way.
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I think I’m going to have to start my posts with
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:-) = being true
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;-) = being silly
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* – Dr Michael Martin, with sharks and spiders
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Haha! Jacob & WTF are landlubber pussies. Thelaughingboy is still missing the point. FSM will never become a cult. Even if there was a disclaimer, there would still be people who believe it’s true. Get over it.
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Besides, who really cares if someone gets hurt? People get hurt every minute of every hour of every single day.
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All hail His Noodly Goodness!
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RAmen
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BTW, laughingboy, it’s a-the-ist. Say it with me, A-THEE-IST.
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Skeptick – so cynical :-)
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yesh.
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i am cynical.
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you say that like it’s a bad thing!
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:-)
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RAmen
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Okay OEJ, I came up with Mel Brooks on the way into work. I had the old lady type it in for me- remotely, if you will. Mel Brooks is better than most people will ever know. Just plain Yogurt! How about this: “Did you will the towell to fall?” That is one of my all time favorite lines, from one of my favorite flicks. From the same mervie comes “what if he’s an escaped vivisectionist?!” Get on it before the whores, or hordes beat you to it.
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Mel Brooks…. History of the world…..
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Moses (Brooks) is shown coming down from Mount Sinai after receiving the law from God (the voice of an uncredited Carl Reiner). When announcing the giving of the reception of the law to the people, Moses proclaims “I have given unto you Fifteen…” (his proclamation is interrupted by his dropping and shattering of one of three tablets) “Oy!… Ten! Ten Commandments! For all to obey!”
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Ramen
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Everyone here should listen to this, as it deals with education in America!
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http://inc-omplete.org/digg/verizon.mp3
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Download the file and listen (mozilla didn’t work for me?), its the funniest thing I have heard in quite a while!
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Verizon operators and management don’t understand the difference between .002 cents and .002 dollars. Its almost painful to listen to but absolutely hilarious!
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I’m sure there are some people on the edge of sanity or mental retardation that believe this is not a satire. I feel sorry for them, but I’m not worried about any negitive repercussions.
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I personally feel that if these people’s lives are truely ruined because of a different religion, then there is something wrong with the person not the religion. These people must shallow and week if they are unable to talk about religion with a friend, and the same thing would happen if a mormon missionary went to their bus stop every morning.
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Bawawawawa
Water for sale… Miracle water for sale… .002 per…
Get your water here…
That’s pretty sad! hahahaha
Ramen
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@peter popoff
jeezus man are you still goin on with that joke?
sorry about the other day’ didn’t know you were swabbie’s
and ok I’ll take some of the water so I can mix it with me rum. arrr
but where am I gonna get .002 cents?
anyone got change for a penny?
Ramen
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It’s one the house for the regulars!
I was laughing and laughing at that link above, trying to explain the difference
between, .002 and .000002 to the Verizon phone company.
It’s a funny link!
Enjoy your water…
Ramen
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Thanks pete! But it’s really .00002 (I think)
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well I’ve gotta go and get some brews to wash down the rum(and practice my drums before it gets to late). speaking of which maybe we should get some FSMbands together to praise his Noodly goodness, ala christianrock. maybe steal some of their songs and replace jesus with eff ess em.
be back in an hour or two
Ramen
btw
I may be heading out to see the show tomorrow, anyone goin?
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@Parmesan the Greated: I like the idea of a FSM band, but it seems unoriginal. You should find a way to get in contact with Les Claypool. He seems like he would love to play a song about FSM.
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Yea, I saw the extra 0 after I pushed submit… To late!
Good stuff!
Get your water here…
I’m going to call Andrea…
Ramen
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“I’m going to call Andrea…”
Someone on another forum said they already disabled that number. Verizon will never hear the end of this one!
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I’m a brown crayon, you son of a bitch.
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yeah les would be great to work with, but
I don’t wanna do primus as its been done, I was thinking more like ray charles, ya know? more gospel kinda…….
sauce……..
cheese..
meat.
mixed with mars volta.
dig it or swirl it( fork style).
HEY, that’s my new saying!!!!!!!!
swirl it!!!
I think the Noodly One has touched me again!
can you swirl it?
sauce and parmesan be upon you all
Ramen
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@Nick the Infidel
That link was great; thank you very much.
-Avatar of Reason
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I think this is the same person that wrote the “your religion split me up from my friend” letter
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I don’t understand the original post. How can the truth be taken too far?
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Brother Boyardee
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@Nick the Infidel
Listening to that link right now. Yep. I’ve dealt with people that stupid too though not for as long a time. I’m getting more depressed every second.
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St John the Blasphemist
Saint of Not Stupid People
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Is Jacob talking about ID?
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@Beastly Rich Dec 9th, 2006 at 5:37 am
‘I think this is the same person that wrote the “your religion split me up from my friend†letter’
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Jacob and his friends have been big on the FSM money stamp thread over the past few days. I kinda missed it, but it looked like a long battle.
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Wasn’t much of a battle really. More like babble. BLR puts up a better fight.
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Now this is how philosophical debates should be conducted:
http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2006/12/for_the_philosophers_at_scienc.php
It really captures the essence of interplay of some of the most brilliant minds in the history of the world.
RAmen
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You do realize that the cliche is “Not the sharpest crayon in the box”, which pretty much goes to show that indeed not every one is “the brightest crayon”. The other cliche is “smart cookie” and “bright light”(that’s not used much).
I like smart cookies
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I like ‘Not the brightest button on parade’.
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“A couple fries short of a happy meal” or my favorite “A FUCKING IDIOT!!!”
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‘not the sharpest tool in the shed’
‘a spoon, not the sharpest cutlery in the draw’
RAmen
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‘Thick as two short planks’
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‘A few sandwiches short of a picnic’
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‘Fundimental’
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You can’t be a Christian Fundamentalist without making a complete fundament of yourself.
Try looking it up here:
http://www.thefreedictionary.com/fundament
Or being completely mental come to that…
Nick
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Wowzers, FSM ruining lives? Fore real? Our Noodly Master only embraces life. He would never ruin anyones’ life, just ask the midget!
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@firemancheesehead
‘….. just ask the midget!’
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Or the penquin.
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@Wench Nikkiee
“Or the Penguin”
Or the Joker????? hahahaha
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wow this shit is bullll my friend belives in it & i think i should stop being publishd
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Just cause we need to piss off pur uptight relifious buddies…..
The “real” book of JOB
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHPg3kjKBRc
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@Jingles
‘A couple of beers short of a six pack’
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@cchheell Dec 11th, 2006 at 3:59 pm
‘i think i should stop being publishd’
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I think you should stop being published too, at least til you have a little more spelling and grammatical experience, at least.
RAmen for your self awareness.
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it looks like my computer is having a hard time spelling tonight. Sheesh!!!
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@cchheell
Mind you we are all for freedom of speech here. Can you say ‘freedom of speech’ or ‘freedom of belief’ C’mon at least try to say them.
RAmen
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@cchheell Dec 11th, 2006 at 3:59 pm
‘i think i should stop being publishd’
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I concur.
Ramen
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You know, when we declare that millions must be killed and maimed in the name of a diety, yeah, will have taken it too far. Until then, I don’t think any other group can talk shit. Let he who is without sin eat the first meatball. RAmen.
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@ cchheell
Arrr… ye need not publish yerself any longer then! Ye be not much else than a squiffy sprog as it is!
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RAmen, arrrr!
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What? Religion ruining someone’s life? Unheard of . . .
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@Jacurutu: Yes, you bring Jacob’s post crumbling to the ground. The free sex of early Wiccan society ended the political lives of mayors, governors, and lords. Christianity responded by created witch hunts and murdering thousands of innocents who were Christians themselves. The saccing of pagan icons by the by all other competing religions still reek havoc today. For example the VA will not allow a Pagan soldier to put the pentagram on his tomb stone. The near extermination of the Jewish race. Then the wars and bigotry that spawn from all religions have also destroys countess lives. FSM cannot compare to the past since we are all open minded and encourage the freedom of speech and belief reguardless of what it is.
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I doubt there’s anyone moronic enough to believe completely and wholely in the FSM..
(I don’t mean it, really. All hail his noodliness.)
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@Kiki: I strongly believe in everything his Noodliness represents, and am looking forward to visiting the beer volcano and stripper factory in the name of Pasta.
RAmen
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I look forward to forming huge Conga lines that would meander from stripper factory to stripper factory and end up at the beer volcano for refreshments.
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If someone actually totally believes in the FSM, they obviously have an easily impressionable nature. So isn’t it better that they get sucked into this kind of religion first, rather than into some other cult? Pasta on a friday and pirate costumes are going to do them far less damage than serious brainwashing. Think of it as salvation.
RAMEN
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Again I must stress that everything the Flying Spaghetti Monster is the absolute truth.
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I love all of of you pastafarians, you guys, “and gals”, are amazing and hilarious
RAmen
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RAmen!!!
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Ooh, stop it! I just bought that irony meter!
Oh, damn.
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@ Q: wwfsmd? A: whatever it wants
RAmen and welcome aboard. May you be forever touched by His Noodly Appendage.
MJK
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First off, let me start by saying that i love this site, i laugh my ass off constantly. However, like many internet sites there seems to be some false information running around. First let me say “WTF” buy a dictionary, i frequently spell words wrong (and probably will in this post) but i have never seen the English language raped so completely. Secondly “Saucy Wench” while i respect your opinion you fell prey to a common misconception during one of your posts. You mentioned something about the United States Constitution being a farce and cited the “seperation of church and state” clause. Let me state for the record that there is no such clause or reference in the U.S. Constitution. Being an avid patriot of America (although i hate the current government with all my being and resent most politicians)i have read the constitution through and through and our fore fathers never mentioned a seperation of church and state. This country was founded on Christianity but is to remain tolorant to all religions as stated in the Bill of Rights. “Seperation of church and state” is a relatively new phrase brought about mid century when politicians decided to become more “PC”. You can take my word for it or read the Constitution yourself (btw, it’s a boring read). Anyway, just for the record, i am a Christian but i completely disagree w/ ID being taught as a science. I am not well educated enough on ID or Evolution to make an inteligent argument so i won’t even waste your time or mine. I am at least inteligent enough to appreciate the humor and brilliance of the CoFSM and its grand creator (BTW anyone brilliant enough to invent beer volcanoe’s and stipper factories deserves to be our next president). And Saucy Wench, i don’t mean to offend and usually enjoy your posts, but as a patriot i felt the need to defend the constitution against false information, but please don’t take it personally. Let me conclude by saying to anyone whose “lives were ruined by FSM”…. get a new life.
May his noodley appendage touch us all (preferably on our junk)
RAmen
Dr. Worm
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I didn’t think our english was so bad, it’s the theists that don’t bother to spell.
read: http://www.religioustolerance.org/scs_intr.htm
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The First Amendment reads:Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.” and was rattified in 1791
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You should have read more carefully.
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@Beastly Rich
The key phrase in the First Amendment is “Congress shall make no law repecting an extablishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof” This simply means that Congress does not have the ability to impose laws upon the rights of followers of any religion, mainstream or otherwise. Furthermore, they state “NO LAW.” This means Congress can neither combine church and state or seperate it, Congress simply does not have the ability in either respect. But at this current time, people beieve that it is illegal or un-constitutional to combine church and state when it really is not, because no law can be made regarding the relationship of the two. Granted, this phrase is up for debate regarding its interpretation, but i believe this phrase means that the choice is up to the people of the region, not the federal government. Those in the Bible belt may decide prayer in school is ok, while those in California may decide otherwise. In either case, it should be the choice of the surrounding populace, not a few paid off fat cats in congressional seats. I believe our fore fathers meant for issues like this to be taken up by the people from region to region. If you happen to be a minority in any region of America, you always have the choice to move to an area where you can join the majority. On a side note, i recently visited D.C. If our fore fathers really intended a complete seperation of church and state then our monuments would look much different than they do today. It’s almost impossible to find a historical monument in D.C. that does not at least reference God or depict some type of biblical scene or reference. As i said before, people can follow any religion they want, i really don’t care, it doesn’t affect me. But i stand by my previous argument that seperation of chuch and state is not in the Constitution, although im sure my argument has not changed your mind anymore than yours changed mine. However, i do respect your opinion and am impressed that someone actually took the time to check up on my previous rantings. Kudos
RAmen
Dr. Worm
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“This simply means that Congress does not have the ability to impose laws upon the rights of followers of any religion, mainstream or otherwise. Furthermore, they state “NO LAW.†This means Congress can neither combine church and state or seperate it, Congress simply does not have the ability in either respect.” This is rubbish. As a statement it makes no logical sense. How the hell did you get to “This means Congress can neither combine church and state or seperate it, Congress simply does not have the ability in either respect.” from “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof”? The second statement from the 1st amendment directly contradicts what you said. Church and state were separated from the very beginning.
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” If you happen to be a minority in any region of America, you always have the choice to move to an area where you can join the majority.” This is bordering on bigotism. People shouldn’t be obliged to move and leave their communities because a load of the locals have decided that they break the local rules.
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†If you happen to be a minority in any region of America, you always have the choice to move to an area where you can join the majority.â€
— Expecially if there is no such place in existant, how ignorant of you to state; I mean really now.
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I respectfully disagree, Dr. Worm. The founding fathers forbid the establishment of a state religion, like the Church of England. That is what that part was all about. Remember the context of the times. Also remember the authors of the Constitution like James Madison who held that inalienable rights like freedom of religion were to be decided by central values, not by a majority of dissenters. He was a close friend and ally of Thomas Jefferson.
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Well first of all let me thank Oarless Marc for “respectfully” disagreeing with me, instead of treating me like an inbread yokel. Unfortunately it is hard for me to eloquently state my opinion in a series of threads. I think it is safe to say that no one is going to change anyone’s minds here so i might as well drop the subject all together before the flaming gets too irritating to read. It is obvious that we all have differing opinions when it comes to politics, but let me state for the record that i am not a bigot or racist, but i can see how my previous comments may have come off that way, if they did i am sorry. Anyway, perhaps if we were all in a bar, after 15 or 16 beers… some name calling… and a fistfight (that turns into one of those cool bar room brawls you seen in the movies) we may actually be able to change each others minds. Unfortunately that wont happen (I would love to get one of those cool facial scars from bottle across my forhead), bud i digress. Our opinions obviously differ, so i will respectfully withdraw my previous statements (as they have no business on this particular site anyway), so that we may continue to praise and spread the word of the Great FSM, and stop arguing over something as boring and un-funny as politics. As far as i’m concerned i’m happy to agree to disagree. May his noodley appendage strike me down if i bring up this particular subject again! Thank you for your input, and thanks again OM for being respectful in your response, you are a scholar and a meatball (meatball being a higher social compliment than gentleman) :)
RAmen
Dr.Worm
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Please be nice to the people who write hate mails. Remember the 3. of the “I’d Really Rather You Didn’tsâ€.
…Or, Well, Just Play Nice, Okay?…
I feel sorry for them.
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It is a joyous day when another soul finds its way to the warm plate where His noodles dwell. Parmagiana Ramen!
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Dr. Worm- “i have never seen the English language raped so completely.” You should check out some of the hate mail. Makes you weep for the future of the world, really.
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I don’t agree with your posts on seperation of church and state, but hey, you were respectful about it, so whatever. Welcome to the Holy Church!
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@gill
well gill it definately looks like i stand alone on my stance but thats ok, im kinda use to being the minoirty when it comes to politics, no big deal. I just don’t want people thinking im a bigot or anything like that. anyway, thanks for the warm welcome to the CoFSM!!
RAmen
Dr. worm
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The Church of England has drunken Bishops and Vicars with an unhealthy interest in children.
Damn their eyes the scurvy dogs.
As for our Catholic clergy in our blessed England………They’re bl**dy worse!
Gawd bless our dear Royal ( touch my forelock) family, the Prince William finished his military training today, I wonder when he will be posted to I-raq?
I’m not holding my breath!
All hail the Flying Spaghetti Monster, yo ho ho and a bottle of rum, splice the mainbrace Brothers, Ramen Arrr.
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You know, i was thinking…. If the FSM is a parody of God and his creation of Earth, where are the other similarities? Creationism was explained by the Great Prophet in the form of mountains, trees and a midget. And Heaven is explained as beer volcanoes and stipper factories (i can’t wait till i die!!!) But what about his “only begotten son?” Has the FSM sent his son to Earth to srpead his word? What about crucifiction (don’t know if that’s spelled right or not)? Anyway,i guess what i’m saying is that i would like to know more about the history of the FSM and how he has effected mankind. If there are any adult swim watchers in the church that happen to love Aqua Teen Hunger Force as much as i do, i propose that Meatwad be the physical embodiement of the FSM. He’s a giant meatball, he’s kind and spreads the message of love and rainbows…. and he makes me laugh my ass off. I admit to being fairly uneducated on the FSM but if we have not already recognized his physical presence on Earth, i think Meatwad fits the bill. Everyone let me know what you think…
RAmen
Dr. Worm
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‘But what about his “only begotten son?‒
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The FSM is different to the god in the bibble. There is, of course, the Midgit and also an unconfirmed reference, in the GoFSM, to the Midgit being turned into a penquin by the FSM. Like all other religious works, details are still coming to light. (translations at any rate)
RAmen
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There are also rumours of a guy called Cheesus, but, like hell, they seem to have been added on outside of the text.
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Oh yeah, Cheesus. I forgot all about Cheesus!
RAmen Jingles
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@Jingles
Thank you for bringing up another issue, for non-believers of FSM what is the opposite of beer volcano’s and stripper factories? Urine volcano’s and hippie factories? I just feel i need to know more about the religion, and i’m way to poor to afford to go out and buy the Gospel. Is it posted online anywhere? i just feel i need more answers. But seriously I vote we consider Meatwad as his chosen Messiah for this world
RAmen
Dr. Worm
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I can’t believe that so many people have taken this thing seriously; I mean, come on, this was so obviously just a well constructed joke, a very well constructed joke at that. Can’t anyone appreciate the humour. It doesnt say much for humans that one guy excercises a highly developed sense of humour and suddenly some quite serious controversy arises. I loved this website, in fact i was quite disabled with laughter over the ahte mail; that people could take it so seriously was the best joke i have heard in a long time, and i have heard a few precious ones.
Anyway, thats all i wanted to say, and thanks for the laugh!
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“…for non-believers of FSM what is the opposite of beer volcano’s and stripper factories? Urine volcano’s and hippie factories?”
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Nah… nothing so cruel.
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We just make them brew the beer, stoke the volcanoes, do the dishes, swab out the stripper factory, and other menial tasks, before letting them go on a break with ugly strippers and flat beer.
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Please note though, that’s really only for the ones that are arseholes about not believing.
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Those that don’t know any better, but don’t disrespect the church, just have to wait in line for the beer volcano, and don’t get the really top of the line strippers, only the alrightish ones.
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Finally, what’s wrong with hippies? Peace loving, good music, and let’s face it, they were usually far too high to try and argue religion… sounds pretty good to me.
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hey people,
i know everyone has there own opinion with religions.. this message may sound rather foolish coz i am only 14 years old… i read about this religion because i went to my local theme park, and these FSM beleive gave us little pan-flettes with the information about this religion….
I was really thinking too myself about the beleifs that you FSM beleivers have put down… such as: Beer Volcanoes, Stripper Factories(tht wuld b good :P)dressing up as pirates?
when i saw the pirate part…i thought to myself ‘What The Hell?!?!’..
ive searched pretty much around the internet for proof and studies that pirates keep the temperature down?
Pirates do nothing for the Temperature and Global Warming? when there at sea, they dont just get this big vacuum looking machine and suck in all the green-house gases that float infront and above them?
but you know…. i have NO religion beleifs at all… i dont beleive in god or anything because i havnt really thought at about it…. im only a 14 year old boy who thinks this FSM beleif is more for humour but im not going to offend anyone who beleives in this religion… or any other religion… i shuldnt even care about this… but i just want to know all the answers and proof for these so called.. “Scientific Studied Facts” of the Flying Spaghetti Monster….
Would that mean that the FSM’s favourite country is ITALY and hes nationality is Italian??
jokes….
thanks everyone,
Ozzy
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Great post Ozzy!
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Don’t discount yourself for your age. You grasp the concept of the FSM better than many adults that visit here.
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And don’t be afraid to offend religious beliefs. Religions deserve no special reverence. It is only social conditioning that leads us to think so.
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So, the pirate in me says… Good on ye Jim-lad! Tighten tha main! Thar be rough seas ahead, but treasure beyond! Yaarrrg!
.
OEJ, Ship’s Navigator
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~~CONTINUING~~
oh god….. i just read some even more information on how the countries were made…..
it just makes me wanna cry…
EXAMPLE: Australia(where i live) the kangaroo’s and joeys tryed to jump very high
And tried to fly like the FSM, but unfortunatly japanese people took pictures
of the kangaroos and joeys which took the FSM spell away from them
Disabling the kangaroos to fly… so the FSM’s revenge for this, is too get
God-zilla to eat the japanese people…on the way home!!!
WHERE DO FSM’s BELEIVERS GET THIS INFORMATION FROM!?!?!
THEY HAVE NO FACTS OF THIS PROFANITY!
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thank you One Eyed Jack…
i just really dont know how this religion can be true??
to me it makes no sence….
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HAhahahaha
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Yay, another Aussie! There are a few of us. Keep an eye out for wench Nikkiee and spotted zebra as well.
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It’s as true as any other religion Ozzy – watch out also for the demons with the pointy sticks from the Christian hell, and lots of other hard to believe things – welcome to the wonderful world of faith – pick a fairytale and believe in it ;)
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that is SO RELEIFING!!!
i wanted to know if there was some aussies on here…..
ill remember u Jingles, Wench Nikkiee and Spotted Zebra
cya,
Ozzy….
p.s. Would i really want to be touched by a Noodly Appendage owned by 2 large round balls? thats right…… u think about that :P
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“p.s. Would i really want to be touched by a Noodly Appendage owned by 2 large round balls? thats right…… u think about that :P”
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Beats getting nailed to a cross.
.
OEJ
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Hi Ozzy
‘Australia(where i live) the kangaroo’s and joeys tryed to jump very high
And tried to fly like the FSM, but unfortunatly japanese people took pictures
of the kangaroos and joeys which took the FSM spell away from them
Disabling the kangaroos to fly… so the FSM’s revenge for this, is too get
God-zilla to eat the japanese people…on the way home!!!’
.
Is this in the Gospel? ( still don’t have a copy..:(…) If not where can I find it?”
I hadn’t actually read this before, but it sounds good to me. In fact I love it!
I’m with Jingles…hahahahahahahahaha
Yep, certainly as believable as any other religion.
RAmen
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@ OEJ
C’mon, we’re inclusive right? Whatever floats their boat! Far be it from me to stop other people enjoying a bit of old fashioned S&M if they are both consenting adults ;)
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Ozzy, I just loved your posts. :) :)
RAmen
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l definately have to get onto getting the Gospel, especially now that the hard cover is available!
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Booty,
.
There’s leather, restraints, and whips S&M (which I highly endorse) and then there’s the freaks in the corner with the razor blades. But, you’re right. If they keep it to themselves, whatever puts wind in their sails is fine by me.
.
OEJ
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Hard cover? What? When? Where?
.
OEJ
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I want to buy a load of them and put them in place of the bibles in the rooms of the hotel where I work, but I’m not that rich.
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hey again!
im glad Wench Nikkiee enjoyed my comments (u rock) :)
yeh i saw u wanted to know where i got the info from?
heres the link:
http://www.scq.ubc.ca/?p=233
just go in there…. and i just scrolled down till i saw the paragraph which started with the great country name Australia….
i havent really wanted to check the other countries, im getting a bit freaked out!
but i saw something in antarctica about dwarves turning in to Antartic Penguins??
cya,
The Ozzy Appendage
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Ozzy,
.
The story of midgets being turned into penguins can be found in The Gospel of the FSM, page 138.
.
OEJ
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@One Eyed Jack
‘Hard cover? What? When? Where?’
.
There isn’t? I’m sure I saw mention of it somewhere. Not positive though.
.
@Ozzy
Hey Ozzy, thanks for the link. :) I hope you call in from time to time. The Pastafarians are cool and really nice people to boot. (funny too!)
.
‘i havent really wanted to check the other countries, im getting a bit freaked out!
but i saw something in antarctica about dwarves turning in to Antartic Penguins??’
.
Yeah apparently, except it was a Midgit, not any ordinary midget either, but a Sacred Midgit. OEJ is one of our expert theologians on the Gospel.
Don’t take it all too seriously Ozzie.
RAmen Ozzy
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Why would i want The Gospel Of The FSM??
My personal religion runs off the Chuck Norris Gospel Of Faith!!
Where it explains quite detailed about how he created the FSM to do all his laundry and toilet scrubbings?
only joking… i made the FSM!
cya, (haha the FSM’s nightmare would be a Saucepan 3 quarters way filled with water and a Lightly Oiled Fry-pan!)
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oh?
i really had no idea your religous with the FMS??
i had no idea!
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@ OEJ and Nikkiie (?sp!)
The hard cover Gospel is availalbe through the glory that is Amazon on line – enjoy!
It even has one of those cool string things for keeping your page ;)
@ OEJ – can’t say I have ever been tempted by the S&M thing – razorblades!??!!! Eeek!
I just prefer my husband and a nice supply of AA batteries ;)
But, each to their own, so long as they don’t end up in my department with things stuck up various orifices (although I have yet to come across an oar!)
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‘(haha the FSM’s nightmare would be a Saucepan 3 quarters way filled with water and a Lightly Oiled Fry-pan!)’
.
No, Pasta is just the sacrament. The FSM, is like all the other Gods and is invisible
and omnipresent. Patafarians are encouraged to eat pasta so as to be filled with His Noodley goodness, as well as to sate their appetite.
RAmen
ps You are not a ninja are you?
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@Booty
’so long as they don’t end up in my department with things stuck up various orifices (although I have yet to come across an oar!)’
.
I’m assuming that Pastafarians at the CoFSM will be the first to be informed if you ever do?
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Ozzy Dec 16th, 2006 at 5:42 am
‘yeh i saw u wanted to know where i got the info from?
heres the link:
http://www.scq.ubc.ca/?p=233
just go in there…. and i just scrolled down till i saw the paragraph which started with the great country name Australia….
The Ozzy Appendage’
.
Has anyone seen the article at this link, before its publication in this SCQ mag?
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i like kangarooos theyz makes me happiez
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I’m so happiez for you…I think.
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Ha! Very funny noodle! Of course you guys are kidding about the FSM not being real. Right? I just spent all this time memorizing all this sh*t so I could spread the word. Dont even JOKE about this not being real.
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The FSM is as real as all the other gods, so don’t worry.
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I can’t do these italic threads…
Sorry
Ramen
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Christianity. Crusades. Need I say more on “taking it too far”?
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If you are unintelligent enough to lose a friend just because of her beliefs, you don’t deserve to be her friend. I could worship a dust particle as an almighty being and my friends would just sort of be like “Hm….that’s cool…”. No doubt you two had a falling out because of your sheer closed-mindedness. If she wants to believe that spaghetti made the universe, let her, because she obviously has no issues with you believing that some dude on a cloud did.
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@Jacob
The pastafarian belief that the FSM is invisible and omnipotent is no different than your beliefs.
@Dr. Worm
You are so wrong about the constitution! You say there is nothing in it about the separation of church and state, and yet it clearly states that the government shall make no law establishing religion. And this nation was most certainly not “founded on christianity” as you claim. This nation was founded on the basis of freedom of, and from, religion, founded for the very reason to escape the faulty logic of your claim that the nation was founded on chritianity! And our forefathers, the originators and authors of our constitution, surely DID write extensively about the need to keep the state separated from any church. Just because they did not put it verbatim into the constitution does not mean that they did not intend the constitution to represent this fact. Your incorrect assertions that the constitution does not call for separation of church and state, and that the nation was founded on chritianity, are examples of the very reason our nation was founded to begin with, to escape religious rationalizations that strive to dominate and control societies.
Avast! and Yarr! you zealous worshipers of a false god! Mend yer evil ways and feel the love of His Noodily Appendage. Midgets are real, giants never were! PROOF I tell yee…PROOF! (I’m winking under my eye patch)
Jeromy
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Just be thankful that your friend was touched by his noodly appendage before falling into the trap of other, more dangerous belief systems. Being brainwashed into hatred is a far more distressing option than finding the Truth of the FSM.
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Jacob,
We pastafarians have to accept that if there are people daft enough to believe the Christian mythology then clearly some people are going to be convinced by the CoFSM.
That is because CoFSM has more convincing arguments better (if flimsy) moral standards, beer (which we call grog) and babes (who we [often respectfully] call wenches) so almost by definition some people will be TBHNA and come over the one true faith.
Let’s face it, even the nice looking Christian wenches never put out – I should know – so you’re almost guaranteed to be wasting your time anyway.
RAmen.
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Yes, indeed. People will believe what they’re told. That’s why there’s so many unworthy Christians – I have to say mainly in the USA.
“Hate the LGBT”, “no other religions are correct”…etc.
People in North and South America started as Animists and now they’ve taken the whole relaxed, “alright” sort of Christianity from the majority of what we now call Europe and turned it into this savage indoctrinating way of life…Seriously we’d have all been better off if America had stayed Animist.
I can’t believe you waste your time arguing thoughts that are quite lacking of real analisis.
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Take a look at some of the hate mail on this site…some people actually have said it ruined their lives because their friends have believed in this stuff, and yes in fact I do know a girl who told me about this, and yes, she does belive in this stuff, with all of her heart. I don’t think that you people take into consideration that not everyone is the brightest crayon in the box and people will believe in anything they’re told..it’s a fact of life. I mean…I’m all for fun and games and joking around…but there really is a point of taking it to far. I mean…come on…look at what you’re doing in your spare time…it kind of depresses me.
-Jacob
This reminds me of something:
*Guy gets born to legitamate parents(Mary and John(I think))*
*Guy claims he his the son of God, completely disowning his real father*
*Mary claims to be a virgin, though she has had a baby, also disowning John*
*People believe it*
Pastafarianism has more proof supporting it than any other religion. It’s also the safest religion. Not one person has died as a result of FSMism. This shows that the FSM cares more about his people than God does(if he exist, which he doesn’t)
Also, you shouldn’t disown a friend because they believe in something different than you. Thats the evil way of the Christian.
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Well, except that Mary got knocked up before John married her. That is pretty well known. I can’t post in this thread though, these damn italics drive me nuts!
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To all who have the unforutnateness to take this religion so seriously that it ruins lives, I wish a fine successful rehab.
RAmen
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If anyone actually believes what they read on this site “with all their heart” then they need help. Professional help and they need it fast.
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@ peter Popoff
why do italics drive you insane????
Find peace, look at Buddha, he weighed a good 400 pounds, and he was happy, don’t you think he was frustrated with his weight??
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You know someone who believed in FSM and it ruined their life? Man thats Darwinism at work.
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rak Feb 11th, 2007 at 2:32 pm
You know someone who believed in FSM and it ruined their life? Man thats Darwinism at work.
.
Nah, That’s pasta at its best!
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Hi Peter. Am I persona non grata with you :)
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“not everyone is the brightest crayon in the box and people will believe in anything they’re told”
How true, I know this one dude, who believes a story about a guy called Jesus being taken up a hill and getting nailed by a couple of romans. Some people will believe anything…..
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@Street Carp
Ummmmm…that part of the yarn is probably true – much like Cleopatra is probably true. The part where he gets nailed, whipped, stabbed and generally DOA on Friday but is home for dinner on Sunday is the fishy bit.
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Oh yeah, it’s all true, it has to be, it’s gospel.
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@Jacob
“look at what you’re doing in your spare time…it kind of depresses me”
It’s called “spare” time, isn’t it? Since when even my spare time must be devoted to drama, work and deep thinking? THAT would depress me.
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Many people need to feel that they belong to something more powerful than themselves that can help guide them through dark and sad times. They need to have some being to ask for guidance and strength. This is because they are weak. It’s ok to be weak. It’s ok to need a little something more to make it through life. Life is pretty damn horrible sometimes. I know some wonderful open-minded Christians. I also have friends who are Muslim, Buddhist and Hindu. They do not preach hate. It is not ok to hate. It’s really not. It’s not ok to think that your way of thinking is the only way and that everyone else has to succumb to it. It’s not ok to think that some people are going to hell just because they pray to their god in a different language and call their god a different name. I read these emails and it’s like some of the Christians need to be vindicated, they sneer and feel joy because people like me are “going to hellâ€. How would their god feel about that? That they wish me ill just because I don’t think the same way they do. There is darkness in their hearts, and that is a perfect example of why they need to believe in something bigger than themselves. If they did not, their darkness would consume them. I don’t believe in hell. It’s really a stupid idea. But some people need to be reassured that the good will be rewarded and the bad will be punished. I don’t believe in heaven either. What about the idea of being a good person because it makes life better for everyone? Not just because there is going to be some reward in it for you. I have been working as an Oncology nurse for the last two years. Everyday I give love and take the burden. I share grief, I hold people. I support them until the very end. I don’t do this because I think there is some magical land waiting for me. I do this because I love to help people. I don’t need a reward for motivation. If your life is tough, you just have to keep going. Really, it’s ok if you need a god to look up to. But some people don’t. And that’s ok too.
Oh, and what do I need? I need a little humor sometimes, and that’s why I like this site
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After reviewing much of this site, I cannot help but think just how much sense this makes. I am not a believer in anything, and of course, I cannot disprove that a god, or gods exist. I am constantly shocked by religion around the world, and how one persons fear and misunderstanding of their life around them, forced them to believe that they were created by a being that not one other person has seen. I may very well convert to Pastafarianism just to make the people around me see just how nonsensical their beliefs are. Instead of trying to figure out where we came from, we should instead figure out where we’re going as a race. We all can’t possibly believe in the same thing at once, because that will just lead to a different conflict.
Keep it up, and don’t let any hate mail by relegious zealots discourage you from proving them wrong about their pointless existances.
Sincerely,
Andrew
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Don’t stuff it up!
Hey – we have a good thing going here. People come in every week and give us donations and behave themselves out of fear of our God punishing thiem. Then you guys go and ridicule our nice little system. Leave us the hell alone! Try joining us instead – we could use a few extra donations.
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First of all thats fake as shit, and second, the last time someone posted in here was on Feb 27th, 2007 at 7:58 pm. So FUCK OFF.
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I think everyone who is complaining about our belief in the Holy Spagetti is missing the point. The reason (as far as I understand it) that we believe in the FSM is to point out the basic hypocrisy of ANY religion. Not only is it fundamentally flawed, it is also fundamentally unprovable and thus our belief in FSM is just as valid as any other (and I do believe that there is place for religious acceptance, not in Science Class however). The result of anybody taking FSM too seriously is the same result that would come about from any newly formed cult/religion, and more scarily we are no-where near as dangerous as some radical readings of the Bible or Qur’an. I’d like you to point out where FSM tries to convince you to burn heretics, or stone adulterous women to death? How on earth do you argue that we are more dangerous then that?
By the way, I recognise that this may not entirely relevent to this post, however it occured to me while I was reading it.
regards
Shing Gorbad
PS: Red Suace, by FSM, have you worked it out my friend, to be honest, you’ve done more than most of the rest of us have.
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Jacob, the only reason it has gone too far is because the people who believe in it has gone too far. It’s their own fault for believing in bobby’s religion, not bobby.
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Jacob, have you heard of “Freedom of religion”? and how does it affect you if your friend believes thyis. I would love to know.
BTW my friend is pastafarian, I am agnostic, and my brother, who also knows him, is fundie athiest. Neither of us care.
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oh shit, i feel really bad for jacob. his friend recieved hope from an organisation that wasn’t his. maybe we should crush all his friend’s hopes and dreams so jacob can be happy in the knowledge that if christianity can’t have her, no one can.
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what harm is this religion doing to anyone. FSM is not saying to give up your family and friends and school and money and go live in a comune with ther people of this religion. what harms is pastafarianisum doing to anyone??? well…?
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Hi people! I wanted to get a credit card to combine the two I have now so I would have only one bill. Well I applied at but they only gave me a credit line of 2000. And I needed 5000 to pay off the credit cards I have at present. What do I do now? Please help.
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A greater majority of Pastafarians pretend, when in public, to completely, 100% believe it. I seriously doubt she actually believes it. Don’t worry man. It’s all good…
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