Dear Mr. Henderson,
I have noticed that you have started this thing called Pastafarianism. Â I
would like to start off the first of a long list of complaints, by simply
stating that that pun is horrible. It’s not even creative. Â Way to be
original… not. Â Second of all… you guys claim that Pirates are your
followers, and that nobody has ever killed anybody in the name of the FSM.
While… looking back on History I happen to find that the history of
Pirates is filled full of rape, murder, and pillaging. Â This is probably the
point where you say “that’s what they want you to think” but this is also
the point where I point out that no noodly meat sac in the sky ever rewrote
history to say that Blackbeard was a cheery fellow who spread joy to others.
To think that some noodle thing in the sky rewrote history is just pure
ludacris. Â Also, why is it a Spaghetti monster? Â Don’t you find that a
little biased towards Italians. Â I don’t appreciate your bias. Â If you are
going to continue with your charade, please choose a God that represents
more people than just a minority of people in Europe. Â Your idea for
intelligent design isn’t very well thought through. Â I respect your idea to
mock the Kansas school board, but what I don’t respect is that you dragged
other people into this farce by stating you actually believe this nonsense.
Look at it, really look at it, and think to yourself if you really want
people to back these wildly imaginative ideas of yours. Â If you think you
should… then it’s probably time you stop and consult your local therapist.
I’m not a Christian either, in fact I’m Aetheist. Â My way of thinking is
that if there really was a God… why would he be so dumb as to make people
who actually believe a giant flying noodle made the earth? Â In the long run,
I would appreciate it if you proclaimed this whole thing to be a farce so
that your horribly nerdy followers could get over themselves and go back to
having what little lives they had in the first place. Â If you choose however
to keep up this ploy, I would have to ask that you make your God less biased
towards Pirates and Italians.
Thank You,
TheLaughingMan
As said before they always talk about our arses and how gay we must be. What does this tell me about fundis? They’re all so fucking repressed that they don’t want to admit that they’re just like Ted Haggard.
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Again with the homosexual references? There’s just too much sexual repression in organized religions, that is, unless your a Catholic priest or a fundie evangelist. They can apparently have all the gay sex they want. That’s MRS. Smug Assclown to any of you whom are offended by this statement!
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Bugga, I had a feeling I left out a really important word…”smug”
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@ Nikkiee, yes, the smug part really does it for me. I love the evilutionist part, too.
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Do you want a real waste of bandwith? Try this one:
http://www.americanchronicle.com/articles/viewArticle.asp?articleID=17552
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@Jon E
Just trying to get my thoughts clear on all this:
• We hate “fundes”
• People who beleive in any church or God (except FSM of course)are “Fundes”
• Pope Pius XII was evil and personally was in charge of killing many people in WWII.
• The Catholics (not the Jews as previously) are secretly in control of the world.
Have I summed up our thinking? I need to have these ideas straight when I argue for the great Noodly appendages and our Nation FSM homeland in North Dakota.
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@Johnny Corvette
We done you’ve completely misquoted me on everything I’ve said.
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@ Jon, That article gave me the heebie-jeebies. Wow. It looks so legitimate, and the concepts are presented so eloquently, that it took me a few minutes to realize what was being said. Bastards.
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Oh wait I forgot. All Catholic priests are molesters and all Catholics are sexually repressed.
There. Now I feel better.
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Tried to google the writer and find out who he actually is, but all I got was him trying to promote himself in various places and no actually details on who he is or any qualifications that he may have.
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@Johnny Corvette
Actually I don’t really give a toss about the catholics, but they are a good example of exactly what is wrong with religion and the kind of attrocities that it leads to. Maybe you haven’t been reading these pages to well.
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http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s3i12533
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“More people have died by the hand of the christian church than by any other group, institution or culture ever. Not even Hitler managed quite as many as the Christian Faith.”
“You can add a most of the ones killed by the Nazis onto the Christians numbers as well, the catholic church was happy enough to back up the Nazi regime and it was them after all that was largely responsible for the hatred of the Jews in the first place. “
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“Tried to google the writer and find out who he actually is, but all I got was him trying to promote himself in various places and no actually details on who he is or any qualifications that he may have.”
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Which is a good indication that he has none.
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OEJ
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@Jon E
Just tryin’ to figue out who I should be hatin’ on today.
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Johnny Corvette, I don’t believe we officially hate fundies, or have any officially hate-based positions at all. Personally, I have no love in my heart for hypocritical Bible-thumpers or allegedly-celibate-but-molesting-altar-boys priests. I can find no affection for religion-crazed fundies who proclaim that I’m going to to to their version of Hell if I don’t believe their religion. Pastafarianism itself is gentle, tolerant and kind. Just as in Christianity, individuals within a religion can hold personal beliefs/prejudices that are not officially sanctioned by their chosen religion.
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@Sausy
I agree. Only I would stretch the point to encompass all self- righteous, intolerance people and all those who use religious or scientific ideas as a means to suppress others.
I see a lot of hate and intolerance on this website and I don’t think that is the point.
All hail his noodle-ness.
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fundies?…thats worse than saying noobs….and it’s the people killing the christians…no the other way around…and if so…then your looking at the wrong christian religion
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jeez…didn’t mean to spoil ur little conversation there…feel free to keep on talking to each other
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Thanks SaucyWench. I’m sending this (intelligent design) to all my friends. I love it!
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@James: Not everyone who beleive Christianity are good people, and those that aren’t we tend to call fundementalists. Both the fundementalists and the good people believe in the same God reguardless of the faction within Christianity they follow. Johnny Corvette and SaucyWench are only talking about that extreme group.
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More recently, after the attacks on the WTC, there has been a strong outcry against the Muslim faith. This outcry has been spearheaded by the Christian nations in the west. Fundementalists Christians have been using this outcry as a means of a modern day crusade.
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Then there are the really f**ked up people who are Christians and hate the wars’ attempts at recovering world peace. These are the same fantatics that desicrate the graves of soldiers fallen in Iraq and say that God hates the US. And they claim to be citizens of this nation?
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“…scientific ideas as a means to suppress others.” Now there is something that I can’t think of a single example to support. Johnny Corvette, you have made the same point umpteen times. WE GET IT. We are all hate-mongering intolerant Christian-bashers. Hmmm, come to think of it, what is your point? Are you making a statement against sweeping generalizations? Or are you just a too serious, humorless left-wing assclown?
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@Branded
Modern day Crusades? Oooo I felt the pang of white mans guilt. Without turning this into a big discussion on the war in Iraq can you site any examples of a “Crusadeâ€.
Also can you site any examples people desecrating US solders gave sites in the name of Jesus? Sounds more like anti-war nutters saying they are Christian.
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Mmm, took me less time to convert to Patafarianism than to read the last 3 days of thread. A thread mighty to be from of His apendages.
Anyone needs me, I’m researching the Volcano of Beer – the beer anyway, can’t seem to locate the strippers nor buxon wenches alas…
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@One eyed
I don’t believe Christianity is an evil empire
I don’t believe the Jews did it (what ever it is today)
I don’t believe all Muslims want to kill me (only some)
I don’t believe being atheist makes me smarter than anybody else (me being smarter than everybody else does).
I don’t believe being an atheist gives me the moral high ground.
Religious organizations are fairly well suppressed in many countries. That is not science I guess – just “evolved thinkingâ€. To say that someone who believes in a higher power is dumb and doesn’t have a valid point to make because of what I saw in the museum of natural history is using science to suppress their ideas.
I suppose we should stick to just worshiping his noodly greatness and bashing all other organized religion.
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@Johnny Corvette: I did not say that the war on terror is a bad thing. I actually think we should fight to rebuild Iraq and the Middle East into a successful democracy. What I was trying to illistrate is that the fundementalists within the Christian faith are supporting is for the wrong reasons. You may be right about the lunatics saying they are Christian, but here. http://www.godhatesamerica.com/
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I have no idea what you are talking about. I think you have missed the point of about 99% of this website.
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OK, so I know this is not a political page, though President bush probably wants people to worship him, but the US has to be the most careless, stubborn, vain country in the world, I mean what was that with the kyoto protocol?
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@ One eyed
I only missed 20% of the point – I estimate 30 % of the people here are looking for serious debate about what should and should not be taught to our children.. 30% are looking to praise his Noodly goodness. 20% just trying to understand how the atheist community thinks. Leaving 20% who just hate religion and think anyone who believes in God is stupid and that the Vatican is evil and the Jews did it and bla bla bla…
@ Branded
Wow that is quite a group the WBC. I can total get someone being anti-war from a “thou shall not kill†religious stand point but these guys are just self-righteous hater.
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@SaucyWench: “That article gave me the heebie-jeebies. Wow. It looks so legitimate, and the concepts are presented so eloquently, that it took me a few minutes to realize what was being said. Bastards.”
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Yeah .. did you spot the clever trick in the middle of the article? It’s in the last sentence of the paragraph copied below:-
“Davison points out that a theory “is an hypothesis which, having been tested, has achieved a degree of support, thereby enabling it to make certain predictions.†However in Darwin’s model allegedly nature selects random changes in genetic composition resulting from assumed undirected mutations. So Darwin’s brainchild clearly cannot be tested because if the evolutionary mechanism he proposed is without purpose, its result cannot be predicted.”
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And from that pathetic sleight of hand, the author proceeds to claim that natural selection is necessarily “supernatural”, and that Darwin’s theory is effectively a conjuring trick. Bit bloody rich, if you ask me. And strange too, since the article starts by considering the problem of increasing genetic information, which is the one area science currently really does have difficulty accounting for.
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nb. For anyone interested in the above, but can’t see the ‘trick’, it’s the “..without purpose..” bit. Since it’s cool to work things out for yourself, think of an experiment you could carry out at home, where it’s possible to make a reasonable prediction of the outcome. Now ask yourself where ‘purpose’ plays any part in the experiment, or your ability to predict the result (even if your prediction is wrong).
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@JackBNim
Yes we should have signed the kyoto protocol and then promptly ignored it like everyone else.
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@Johnny Corvette
“I suppose we should stick to just worshiping his noodly greatness and bashing all other organized religion.”
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Please don’t speak for me when you say “we” and please stop telling everyone at the CoFSM how they should think and act. It’s annoying. Thank You.
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@Johnny Corvette. Ah, good. The FSM Church needs a nanny. Do you carry a big, heavy, knuckle-knocking ruler? ☺
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@Wendy – I didn’t realize I was telling people how to think and act.
@ One eyed – I can fly in the air with an umbrella.
Just seem like people who are all upset about other people being intolerance shouldn’t be intolerant.
Maybe it’s just the beer talkin’ arrrg.
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I’m going on the tone of all of your posts, I’ve read over the past few weeks!
BTW
The one thing tolerance cannot tolerate, is intolerance.
I don’t go to christian church sites bashing their religion, so if those with other belief systems come to my chosen religion’s site, bashing mine, I’m am only as tolerant as I choose to be.
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You realize, of course Johnny, that we cannot pay you much. Just a spoonful of sugar. If this is okay, then you can help with the raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens. But not a lot more.
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I think Mr. TheLaughingMan needs to take a step back and take a long look at the Church of Scientology.
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Pirates never killed anyone in the name of FSM. They did it for their own amusement. FSM merely put the midjet on the planet, who evolved into Pirates, who evolved into us today.
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RAmen Jebus
hmm…..you remind of a song which goes ‘Jebus Creebus where’d you get those sneakus’ (well I think it say sneakers)
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Bugga…have to put some music on to get that one out of my head now!
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No no…..I distinctly remember it says ‘where you get dem sneekuz’
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Sounds sort of like the Jeepers Creepers song…
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“Jeepers Creepers, where’d you get those peepers…”
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James—”jeez…didn’t mean to spoil ur little conversation there…feel free to keep on talking to each other”
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Well thank you James, I’m so glad that we have your permission.
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@ Jingles
I’m with you on the “peepers”. I’m not sure of the original song but it was used in a commercial for sunglasses.
RAmen
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I just remember it from that really dodgy horror movie that went aaround a while back.
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Sequel was unintentionally ( I think) hilarious.
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Jingles Dec 7th, 2006 at 11:42 pm
Sounds sort of like the Jeepers Creepers song…
.“Jeepers Creepers, where’d you get those peepers…â€
.
You are absolutely right Jingles. I think we may have said the sneakers thing to one of the kids once (10yo fashion follower if I remember) and that bit was still in my head.
RAmen
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Strange name came up on my post?
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@ Nikkiee
Gremlins on the keyboard?
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Might have been that Bourbon.
Hey, I went shopping yesterday (at couple different shopping centres……having saved heaps of money, without even trying, since becoming a practicing Pastafarian :) :)
and did not hear one xmas carol!
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Sadly, the Xmas carols began here the week of Thanks Giving. I’m sick of it already. Can hardly wait ’til the Boxing Day footie matches! There’s a local just down road that broadcasts plenty of them starting early, around 6 am.
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Those are still a little way off yet.
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