Right, you are some geek sitting up in your one bedroomed appartment thinking of ways to get kicks out of life. Now u have captured my best mate and i wont stop until FSM is expossed as the shabby, bare walled, well conducted piece of rubbish that it is.
I mean a flying spaghetti monster? i think you need to see a pyshologist mate. you have serious problems.
by the way, have you stopped to consider the effects your little game will cause?
i think you have just split up me and my friend. oh yeh i wanna say thanks, thanks for ruining my life.
-rebecca
my apartment is two-bedroomed.
I think Rebecca has been rejected at the stripper factory. May His Noodly Appendage reach out and touch us all!
wow, such a good friend, telling your “best mate” to fuck off because of a difference of opinion.
a true xtian would not have their life ruined by an atheist (read pagan) website. Lost ur friend? Discover the FSM
Ramen
Tha beast
@rebecca. Have you ever thought that your friendships might not be that strong if an IDEA or a BELIEF can destroy it. Just a thought…
Well, Bobby, at least ‘becca didn’t acuse you of laying down in your apartment while you enjoy ruining her life. And if that’s all it took to ruin her life maybe she is the one who should seek professional help. I hope she didn’t break a nail while typing that message or things could get realy ugly.
LONELY?
NEED SALVATION?
You’ll NEVER be allone again with the Jesus Christ inflateable doll!. He WANTS to suffer for YOUR sins!
BE the Devil on Christ’s back!
Featuring realistic vibrating Lamb of God!!!
Follow this link http://www.answersingenesis.org/
to buy your PERSONAL saviour today!
made from durable consecrated ripstop rubber
crucifix and lubricant sold seperately
Is it we that are complete idiots? Or you, the one who is letting their life be ruined by satire? Is it really that hard to realize that the FSM is the one and only true religion?
May the sauce be with you.
That’s great that the fsm has touched so many lives. May we all be touched by his noodly appendage as your friend has. He just keeps getting better now, now he ruined someones life. Ramen
Becky,
Do you really think our Faith (with it’s scientific PROOF) is having such an adverse effect on humanity as much as the other faiths (which are all shabby, bare walled, badly conducted pieces of rubbish)?
I think we should start The Pasta Inquisition.
Trial by boiling water (with a pinch of salt & teaspool of oil).
Rat
PS Becky,
I am a geek sitting in the desert, and boy is it #@#ing hot today! As for how I get my kicks - it involves Gaffa Tape, a claw hammer & nail gun, a goat, and a Creationist!!!
I mean a flying spaghetti monster? i think you need to see a pyshologist mate. you have serious problems.
I think it’s funny how she seems incensed by the fact that it is such a ludicrous platform for a religion. Maybe she would be less pissed if it had been Mother Teresa or Ghandi blinding her “friend w/privileges”. Time to get a new fuck-buddy, or mate, or matey, or whatever you call ‘em in the U.K. or Australia.
Bobby, please tell me you go back and bitch-up the spelling on the hate mail to make us laugh. Nobody can be that bad.
I think somebody should learn how to spell before she attempts to insult anyone.
Why does nobody catch the satire?
RAmen.
Hetzle - It could be, as a psych teacher pointed out, that a vast majority of people don’t mature pass adolescence. In this immature state the world is still black and white, while the rest of us, who have matured pass this point, are able to understand such abstract concepts as satire.
Shabby and well conducted? slight contradiction
As for the effects this causes, i think it rather helpful to point out that FSMism is just as valid as any other religion. I wonder did anyone point out to Abraham the effects that his little game might have, mind you he probably would’nt of cared, he was after all a fucking psycho. And by the way do you really think that it was this site (i.e. a healthy satire) that destroyed your friendship, or you being closed minded, ignorant, arrogant and trying to blame everyone else who doesn’t follow the stupidity of your beleifs.
@-rebecca
“Now u have captured my best mate”
.
He/she is obviously a rational intelligent person while you, my dear, are not.
You are obviously looking to blame someone else for your own shortcomings, one of which is ignorance.
that’s funny “the effects” this little game will ’cause….like what a holy war? a crusade? what exactly?
An bible bashing evangelical cult got hold of my husband and brainwashed him into believing in an imaginary being with their religous rubbish, but you don’t see me crying all over the internet blaming everyone else, do you? Well not until now anyways!
poor girl probably doesn’t have parmesan
Ramen
Let us not think of this as ruining your sad little world of bad spelling and lack of comprehension of satire. We much prefer to celebrate the new found joy that your ex-mate has now found in the greatness of His noodly wisdom and loving meatballs.
RAmen.
Sounds like an attempt to start a movement. The FSM ruins peoples love lives.
Hahaha…… Comes across as, “my friend likes the FSM more than he/she likes me.” Poor, poor child. Can’t be easy, being thrown over for flying spaghetti.
This -must- be a parody.
Wow! Ignorance is a wonderful thing. If you don’t want to take responsibility for something then find someone else to blame. How many examples of this do you want? How about my kids had a shit time and killed himself, therefore it must be because he plays D&D with his pals.
I have plenty of reasons for hating fundis, though I prefer to just pity them as hate takes to much energy and I can think of better things to do with my time. Though I do make an exception for the wife of my brothers pastor who barged into my home on the night my father died, with him still lying on the front room floor and tried to make converts. Far as I’m concerned that woman is totally evil, she was there claiming to be sympathetic, but was really just trying to take advantage of other peoples grief. I had to throw he out,as my brother wouldn’t do it and he didn’t want to offend her. Probably scared that Chuck Smith.
I am sure we have heard from this same rebecca before. Tone, grammar, lower case and name are all too similar . I’ll try to remember the post/thread.
Wow, some friend
I can’t bring myself to hate poor rebecca here. i simply pity her. greatly.
“thanks for ruining my life”
You’re welcome sweetie… But assuming you are a deist, you should blame your god for ruining your life, mate.
btw, I live in a two bedroomed cave
I mean an invisible deity who lives in the sky, reads minds and punishes nonbelievers? i think you need to see a pyshologist mate. you have serious problems.
by the way, have you stopped to consider the effects your little game will cause?
Some people won’t take responsibility for their own actions, ever. The passing of the buck onto God just shows how childish they really are. The only person who’s responsible for your life is you.
@Jon E
“passing of the buck onto God just shows how childish they really are.”
Especially passing the buck onto a spaghetti monster god!
At least we know ours is made up. It’s also a lot more fun.
Have you ever had to sit through a catholic wedding? My cousin got married to a catholic girl a few years ago. It was the most boring thing I’ve ever been to.
I got advised a while back that if I wanted a good time I should crash a Hindu wedding. They at least seem to have fun.
Wonder what a FSM wedding would be like. Would the Priest dress as dread pirate? What would you use instead of a ring?
Not sure about the FSM wedding ceremony. Reguarding the catholic wedding, I can’t remember which was worse, the wedding or the funeral, though the funeral sticks in my mind.
Probably because I got drunk after the wedding.
What would you use instead of a ring?
Spaghetti O?
Never been to a catholic funeral, and hopefully I’ll never have to. Been to a few CoE ones that were OK. The last one I went to was actually the first Humanist Funeral I’ve been to and in a lot of ways had the most fitting lack of ceremony of any I’ve ever been to. It was tailored to fit a very unique man who would probably have loved this website.
rebecca
.
This is a great opportunity for you to have a heart to heart with your mate to discuss your belief systems, listen with an open mind.
.
Remember, if you and your mate do not agree on each other’s belief systems, it’s better to know sooner rather than later.
.
Oh yeah, you might want to read up a little on the site, it will help you see where we’re coming from
.
Just be honest with yourself, and pay attention to the little nagging voice inside that indeed doubts some of your beliefs, but have kept it squelched so far.
jl
Dear Rebbeca,
Your friend is probably better off without you.
Sincerely,
Just Guess
.
P.S. Your spelling sucks.
P.P.S. No hell fire, no death threats, no threats of ass raping with oars? You have a long way to go.
rebecca,
i worry for your sanity dear child
You’re such an ass to point out that the creator of this site lives under such poor conditions considering that you wish you had the time to think of something so genius that only a true nerd could understand this. Au Revoir!
-Rat- Kindly watch where you point that nail gun, I’m mean I’m always up for kinky, but damn! -Parmesan the Greated- That name is truly tasty;>
Rob, I would like to take this time to congratulate you on a wonderful Horatian satire. The fact that people are considering this as a viable religion makes me chortle a good bit as I sit back and remember reading Jonathan Swift’s “A Modest Proposal.” For those of us who are currently unaware of my allusion, I will take the time to briefly explain, just enough for you to get the gist and make the real leap on your own. “A Modest Proposal” (link to the essay http://art-bin.com/art/omodest.html)is this wonderful little essay about eating children. I’ll say it again for emphasis, this Swift bloke actually suggested that we eat children to solve world hunger. Strange solution, no? Outrageous, no? The really crazy part is that The English Parliament actually debated the issue. That’s not to knock the British or anything, my own family came to America from Britian a mere two generations ago. My point, let’s get to that. While we sit here and ponder the meaning of life, what is art, who am I, is the number forty-two significant, I would like to applaud you, Rob, for not only providing us with such a good laugh about a serious subject but drawing attention to this issue in a manner that lets us see how ridiculous we’re being. Thanks again.
i have no idea what this bitch is crying about. does she have a problem with everybody who has a website or is she a fundy. i don’t fucking know
Hail the spag monster! Down with bible-basher Bush
-Chapter 9 -last chapter!
First of all, her message doesn’t make any sense at all. I don’t get what she’s trying to say. But, she does give a compliment to you when she says it is “well conducted” rubbish. What does she mean by “captured my best mate”? Is this message a joke?
Maybe she found her/him tied up with a wet noodle(all kinky-like),and they tried to explain it by blaming it on the FSM.
Kinky BFSM - I like it
What is Sam saying??? I’m British and I know quite a lot about Parliament, etc and I’ve never heard of them debating about the eating of children! What planets she on? Its obviously one where the FSM has no influence
hey! i think that you are silly, and this made my day.
rebecca-
If you can’t beat em’, join em!
we welcome all who wish to jon the flock, and you would find out why your ‘freind’ likes us so much!
@Sam:
Please provide a source for your claim that Parliament actually debated the issue. I don’t think that happened.
Hope this link helps you all understand what Sam was attempting to portray
(didn’t have much time during my TA so I hope it helps!).
http://multitext.ucc.ie/d/Patriotism
“This seemed to imply that Irish political patriotism had no future, but it was animated politically in the decade that followed by Jonathan Swift’s affirmation of Molyneux’s argument in The Drapier’s letters. Perhaps, still more significantly Swift’s commentary on the Irish tendency to blame Britain for its economic problems, brilliantly satirised in A Modest Proposal (1729), combined with the impact of famine conditions served to encourage the development of an economic patriotism that extolled improvement. Moreover, in obvious contrast to the divisive impact of political patriotism, economic development was an issue upon which all could unite, and patriotism achieved a degree of legitimacy and respectability hitherto unthinkable.”
Also for some background upon the subject:
http://www.nde.state.ne.us/SS/irish/unit_3.html
” “A MODEST PROPOSAL”
In 1729, Jonathan Swift, the Dean of St. Patrick’s Cathedral in Dublin, wrote a macabre satire, “A Modest Proposal” in which he tried to draw attention to the horrific conditions of the Irish poor. The pamphlet put forward a scheme for solving Ireland’s economic problems by fattening up the children of the poor and selling them as meat:
“A young healthy child, well nursed, is at a year old, a most delicious, nourishing and wholesome food; whether stewed, roasted, baked or boiled; and I make no doubt, that it will equally serve in fricassee or ragout… I grant that this food will be somewhat dear, and therefore very proper for landlords; who, as they have already devoured most of the parents, seem to have best title to the children.” “
One last link!
http://www.progressiveu.org/220813-a-modest-proposal-of-swift
Rather long read though.
Woo-hoo, Becca, nice use of the word “mate”, that’s probably the biggest word I’ve ever heard a hate-mailer use, and you spelled it right! A+ for that, and an F for your obvious poor ability to maintain a friendship.
Pixel Pete is AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
***************************************************
Wait, if her best mate is a true pastafarian, that would mean that she would have replied to this hate-mail. But frankly she hasn’t. If she does, well done rebecca’s best mate. if she doesn’t well, this is a parody.
(regarding rebecca) hmm at least she said its well conducted - i dn’t think she appreciates the obvious humour on this site somehow and therefore has trouble reading between the lines which suggests she takes everything seriously. This means she cannot distinguish between what is real and what isn’t, therefore she needs the psychologist.
Isn’t logic a wonderful thing?
Sure the FSM is Ridiculus…
Because we all know for a fact that Jesus rose from the dead and walked on water
BTW Sam you are full of shit, British Parliament never debated it at all. Don’t try and look clever by pretending you know anything about British Politics. Especially since I write for a leading political magazine and have access to all the minutes from EVERY debate held in the House of Commons, so I would know.
DICKHEAD
@Tom
Freind, please ignore idiot Americans like Sam. Most of us don’t get our kicks by insulting Britain. of course, we DO have an inside view on how a government should NOT be run, but I don’t think even ours would consider cannibalism as a valid way to end the poulation crisis.
maybe the american government would never consider cannibalism, but i’m pretty certain dick cheney would eat a kitten sandwich without a second thought…that guy is evil. ;-)
“Because we all know for a fact that Jesus rose from the dead and walked on water.”
.
IT’S ZOMBIE JESUS, GET IN THE CAR!
Another great chapter of “My Fundamentalism Makes Me Unhappy”.
Keep rolling.
“Now u have captured my best mateâ€
Alright, who’s been going around kidnapping people? (If this chick’s life is so easily ruined, then wow, did she not have a good life.)
“You are some geek…”
You say it like it’s a bad thing… GEEK PRIDE!
Silly creationist.
Poor Rebbeca. You know, instead of criticizing, you could read up about us and the FSM, and perhaps learn something. After that, you can reconcile with your ‘best mate’ as you put it, and, well, be friends again. Really, don’t blame us for your problems. I believe someone already mentioned that if something like this can break a friendship, than it must not have been a very close one to begin with.
May you find peace peace, Rebecca,
RAmen
Also, exclude that second “peace” in my previous remark. I looked away after I typed it initially, but then typed it again after getting back on my train of thought. :D
“One Bedroomed Apartment”!
Here in the United (England to Americans) Kingdom, the price of housing is so high that only lying fat politicians, movie stars, bl**dy captains of industry, football players and drug dealers can afford to buy a house.
It costs £2,000.000.00p for a one bedroomed apartment in London.
I live in a bl**dy hole in the ground covered with a dead vagrant to keep the bl**dy rain out!
Message to Jesus from Rebeccas friend:
Right, you are some hippy walking around in your sandals thinking of ways to get kicks out of life. Now u have captured my best mate and i wont stop until Christianity is expossed as the shabby, bare walled, well conducted piece of rubbish that it is.
I mean a god that has ultimate power but can only get off by insignificant humans praying to him? i think you need to see a pyshologist mate. you have serious problems.
by the way, have you stopped to consider the effects your little game will cause?
i think you have just split up me and my friend. oh yeh i wanna say thanks, thanks for ruining my life.
-rebecca’s friend
Neofelis - I’m on the website you posted but I can’t find the inflatable jesus. Could you post a direct link? Do they have an inflatable FSM, or perhaps Allah or Muhammad, too?
Hah! If that letter were to me then the joke would be on her! I live in a house! With my mother!
Ah, the hate-mail these days doesn’t have quite the same rambling quality of the old ones. I think a top 20 hate-mail section should be made, by His Noodly Appendage; perhaps we can vote on them or something. Anyone else think it’s a good idea?
-Tagliatellius-,Wow. I had no idea. Give me the address of this hole in the ground and I will send you some nice curtains to match your vagrant. And maybe some throw pillows.
Some thoughts occurred to me as I read the strand: 1)well, of course your apt. is a 2-bedroom, Bobby! You don’t think I’d allow* my baby to live there if you and she were sharing a room, do you? 2) re: an FSM wedding–Cari’s sister is getting married, and I think that Bobby should get a minister’s license and perform the ceremony. 3) “Zombie Jesus; get in the car!” is new to me, and I frikkin’ LOVE IT! 4) If anyone reading this knows Matt LaFever, formerly of Benson, please tell him to send Bobby an email that Bobby can forward to me. Yes, Matt, it is I, your 3rd grade teacher! You and Bobby need to know each other!
*the thought of anyone, ever, “allowing” Cari to do anything makes me smile. the thought of anyone “NOT allowing” her to do anything makes me cringe in terror.
Is it just me or does the hate mail get funnier with each new peice of mail?
Penne Nov 30th, 2006 at 5:42 pm
-Tagliatellius-,Wow. I had no idea. Give me the address of this hole in the ground and I will send you some nice curtains to match your vagrant. And maybe some throw pillows.
.
hahahaha……very funny Penne.
.
@Iamme Nov 30th, 2006 at 5:57 pm
Is it just me or does the hate mail get funnier with each new peice of mail?
.
I think they are trying to be more creative.
@Cari’s mom (aka the mother-out-law)
“getting married, and I think that Bobby should get a minister’s license and perform the ceremony.”
.
Joined in holy pasta by a pasta prophet?
RAmen
Apologies, please forgive.
I meant “by THE pasta prophet”
RAmen
Cari’s mom,
.
I think a FSM wedding is a fine idea. Think of the savings on food alone.
.
OEJ
Well, it is easy to ruin a freindship over an opinion.
It’s like an aithiest(can’t spell) and a cristian fighting over weather there is a god or not, they will end up hating each other.
No disrespect, but that was just an example.
Also rebecca, you have no right to say that.
this is what these people beleive in.
you are not experienced at all in this matter, so you cannot say that. If you research and get more experience, then we’ll talk….
rebecca
if you truley belive that he is an “imaginay god” then how are you letting an “imaginary” monster constructed of complex carbohydrates “ruin your life”?
i think it’s becuase she can’t handle it that her friend won’t agree with her….
I simply can’t resist it! What the hell is a “pyshologist?” I tried to pronounce it and I sounded drunk.
An expert on pyshology, the art of sounding like a complete tool, without the saving grace of being pissed.
.
Or at least, thats my guess based on the available evidence.
I know at least one psychologist who is also a pyshologist then. What an ass. He must have had a double major in college.
I’d have to disagree with you, Rebecca. He is not a complete idiot. He is actually just a very clever, intelectual, who has devised an interesting way of making the Bible less credible. However, I would like to say that Jesus, wether you see him as Jesus Christ, Jesus the Prophet, or just plain Jesus, is a Historical Figure, and ANY historian who knows anything would agree, Christian or otherwise. However, there is no true documentation of said Spaghetti Monster.
Also, true friends, actually no, strong people, who truly believe what they “know to be fact”, regardless of the strength of the friendship, do not allow such an arguement to stand between them and another intellectual. I have many friends, with varied oppinions on creation/evolution, and I’ve never “hated” any of them, just simply disagreed. I love argueing with friends over theories, and beliefs, because it keeps me sharp in my own faith. If you have ever taken the time to glance at the Bible Rebecca (I got the impression you were Christian, if not, please inform me as to what you are, and I will quote the main text of that religion instead.) you will find that it teaches things such as “Hate the sin, not the sinner.” and “love thy brethren.” and “Joyfully share the news of Salvation through Jesus Christ.” not “Hate Non-believers” or “You’re friend’s not Christian? drop them like an iraqi bomb and hug your Bible.” or my personal fave that people seem to believe is somewhere in that ancient text “Use and twist the Word for your own benefit and lifestyle, and attack everyone elses.”
I’m sorry Rebecca, but you are the complete idiot here, not him. If you’re going to deffend Christianity, make sure you “Arm yourself with the Word.” aka, know what the heck you’re talking about. Christianity is about READING the Word, and believing it to be true. Not blindly putting faith and hope into a book that you glanced at the cover of once, and maybe attend a church once and a while. Going to church and carring a Bible around doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage with a key jammed in your ear makes you a car.
I understand most of you would not agree with my beliefs, but please have the decency enough to respect the fact that I know how to say what I think in a well-mannered debate, and I know how to spell the following: Bedroom (as bedroomed is not even a word to begin with.), apartment, you, exposed, well-conducted, psychologist, and yeah.
although yeah, might just be an American spelling of the same word, so she may have been alright on that.
Anyway, not trying to attack any of you. Just trying to get the idiots like Rebecca, who’d throw a Bible at someone before they’d consider reading it, to stop making Christians seem like such incompetent morons. Truth of the matter is that there are Christians who can actually hold a civilized debate and back up our arguements with actual fact (both from the Bible and otherwise.), but unfortunately, we are outnumbered by people who’d rather shout “NO! YOU’RE WRONG! JESUS LOVES YOU! I DONT HAVE TO PROVE IT, I KNOW IT” then actually give an educated opinion on something. Why? Because they DONT HAVE an educated opinion. They’re what I call dead fish, they go with the flow. Not because they chose to, but rather because the have no will or ability to do otherwise.
She sure says mate alot for not being a pirate…. suspicious? we think so
im young, and i dont know much about this religion, but i think it makes perfect sense. I mean, it makes just as much sense as a large mystical man creating…..other men, not saying i dont believe in god, im still deciding which path to choose, but dont hate the game, if religion matters that much to you, you dont have to much of a life. This religion ruined your relationship? i think not. YOU my friend, ruined the realtionship. You are to be blamed.
Good for your friend! He’s obviously too intelligent for the likes of you!
@Cindy: how do you know the original poster hasn’t read her Bible? You, yourself, claim to be able to quote from any of the main religious texts, so you’ll know there are many ‘world views’ out there, and many interpretations of each text. You’ve read the Bible and believe it .. but that doesn’t tell us anything, since many sub-’cults’ have taken the same text, or selected parts of it, and split away from main-stream orthodoxy. Rebecca could be a Christian Fundamentalist .. your version may be ‘love thy neighbour / happy clappy’, but the CF views non-believers as completely sinful. She would, therefore, be correct (in her view) to sever all connection with a turn-coat.
-
Look, Pastafarians don’t (generally) have a problem with people holding any kind of bizarre belief .. it’s your life and if you want to live it believing in some fantasy figure, then knock yourself out. But we can’t stand by whilst those with fantasy agendas infiltrate government, influence education, start wars and destroy lives through ignorance (stem cell research, Aids, abortion etc). Enough! You should be ashamed to be both intelligent AND to have blind faith in an ancient compendium of contradictory and hateful religious propaganda. All we have are some graphs, a loving message, and a sense of humour. But they’re pretty powerful weapons against nonsense.
-Cindy, You totally spanked her nasty ass! -you rock
@Cindy
.
“who’d throw a Bible at someone before they’d consider reading it”
.
Now, that is the first good use of a bible I’ve come across. ;-)
.
OEJ, Ship’s Navigator
I am so tired of people who blame all their problems on others instead of attempting to fix them instead, and then they go and bring god into it just to back them up. I asked god what he thought about this the other day and he said “My child, Blame is but Lame -with a ‘B’ in front of it.”
B. Lame…
.
Short for Bloody Lame perhaps?
Arrrrr………
indeed.
They’ve really gone to the dogs now: http://www.theonion.com/content/node/55694 ‘Besides sitting and staying at a military briefing, Barney also participated in the ground-breaking for a new visitors reception center at Camp Victory, during which he energetically dug alongside camp officials’.-Wow, I guess the Bush family have picked the next member of the clan fit to run for office in the next election already. Next he’ll be shake’n paws and lick’n babies!
“by the way, have you stopped to consider the effects your little game will cause?”
yes, hon, and just by reading your comment i’d say everything is working out perfectly. though i must admit, a night spent with a fine stout pirate friend and a little grog might just change your opinion on our little religion.
ramen.
Hi, I haven’t posted here before but I’ve been reading the site for a while and have been converted. I feel I have been touched by his Noodly Appendage.
Just thought I’d suggest an intersting book the content of which is relevant to the bible issues mentioned above. It’s Misquoting Jesus by Bart D. Ehrman. This is a serious text describing the process by which the bible has been distorted over the centuries by various translations and editings, to the point that it now isn’t hugely relevant to the probable original text.
Worth a read.
To Rebecca:
Go away, get a grip on reality and consider who you are. You may also want to apologise to your friend.
Need a pint.
rebecca. you need a cunnilingus, NOW!
best noodle wishes
well henderson, baby jesus would never let lives be lost from his religion, and here you are letting best mates break up. what kind of prophet are you? not a divine one, that is for sure. i hope you get kicked out of the stripper factory for this.
Right, you are some Christian zealot sitting up in your one bedroomed appartment thinking of ways to get kicks out of life. Now u have captured my best mate and i wont stop until Christianity is expossed as the shabby, bare walled, well conducted piece of rubbish that it is.
.
I mean an anthropomorphized “God” sitting on a “throne” in “heaven”? i think you need to see a pyshologist mate. you have serious problems.
.
by the way, have you stopped to consider the effects your little game will cause?
.
i think you have just split up me and my friend. oh yeh i wanna say thanks, thanks for ruining my life.
.
-Cap’nUberbob
A catholic wedding is the same as a catholic funeral, except at the wedding there are usulaly two people kneeling and the funeral there is usually one person lying down.
what the FUCK is a psyshologist?
He’s got a book, yo. That’s good enough for me.
If your friend and you split up because of the FSM, then you really are a bigot-pseudo-christian… with no sense of humor or irony.
a moment of drama presented by jesus christ (a conversation between Rebecca and friend)
.
“I can’t talk to you anymore, just get out of my life.”
.
“what’s the matter rebecca, i just want to hang out. what’s your problem.”
.
“i can no longer deal with you and your pagan god.”
.
“what pagan god, what the fuck are you talking about.”
.
“don’t give me this mister i worship the flying spaghetti monster.”
.
“wft, you’re mad at me because of that?”
.
“mad, are kidding me, I’M PISSED OFF. there’s only one true god, and that is jesus.”
.
“Dude, just don’t talk to me ok. you’re getting pissed off at me because of a satire site. i can’t even call you my friend.”
.
“don’t come crying to me when you defy god on judgement day”
.
“dude, fuck you, i can’t take anymore of your melodramatic bible bullshit. i can’t put up with this shit anymore, go get a fucking life.”
This is not hate mail: (fyi people who are angry about this and feel the need to write about how stupid this site is, I honestly think that makes you the stupid one, seeing as you’re getting all pissed off about a flying ball of pasta)
Before people bash me I am Catholic and go to church every Sunday.-People are so threatened by others with differing view points that they even feel threatened by the ridiculous Spaghetti Monster. Science is theories that can either be proved or disproved by hard evidence and supporting facts, these theories are added to and changing at all times. Evolution is a part of science, it has and continues to be backed up with facts and artifacts giving it validity it has also been tested and is a supported respected hypothesis. Intelligent Design is not a science, it can neither be proved nor disproved that God is real. I’d be glad to learn about Intelligent Design, but not in my science class. So if the unfortunate day comes that as a student in my biology classes I am supposed to learn about Intelligent Design as a scienctific theory then I’d better be learning about the Spaghetti Monster too, since neither has yet to be proved or disproved.
@ Moochie
First of all, I would like for you to pin point the moment in history when I infiltrated the government, started a war, or ended a life.
Second of all, I AM aware that there are many worldly views, since I’ve done my research on a great number of them, to make sure that what I believe stands the best against cold-hard facts.
Third of all, do not acuse me of blindly following it, because I can asure you I do not blindly follow anything.
Fourth of all, I do not hate. Hate is a futile waste of energy. People who hate waste energy that could be put to so much more productive use. (back to Rebbecca for a sec: Instead of using your energy to hate your friend, and attack these people with backless acusations, take a class and get certified in CPR, maybe you’ll save a life, instead of writing letters that subtract from the sum of human knowledge.)
And to everyone in general, on a much lighter note (no more deffensive arguements). Since there isn’t really a book on Atheism, I’m much less educated as to the beliefs of those who are. Of course Atheism is actually defined as the lack of belief, I think it is more of a technicallity. Because you have to have some oppinion as to what happens when you die, even if it’s that you just blink out of existance.
What happens when you die? do you suddenly lose all awareness, and just are no more? if so, why are we aware of ourselves now? How can we percieve the world in such a way, if we are just another species struggling to survive, until we can no longer? What’s at the end of the universe, and why is it expanding? Scientific theories, and facts prove that the gravitational pull of stars should be contracting the universe by pulling closer to one another. However, the universe is expanding. Scientist openly admit that there is some unknown force that they cannot explain pulling the stars apart. And since it has been proven that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into? a larger universe? if you breached the edge of the universe, what would happen? would you suddenly appear on the polar opposite end like on the classic game Asteroids? would you be in another universe? in heaven? or would the wall act as a massive black hole and cause complete and instant destruction?
Science is amazing. I probably should’ve gone into a philosophy major, rather than Music Composition :) but I love what I do. Science is awesome just as a hobby.
p.s. Kate I like your comment, and agree that no religion is a scientific fact or theory. It belongs in a philosophy class, not a biology class. Evolution, is a scientific theory (it has not been declared a fact to my knowledge). And though I do not believe the theory as a whole, I do agree with the idea that as time goes on animals adapt through evolution among many generations. I don’t think we came from single cells, but we certainly have come a long way since the people whose remains have been found as the earliest people to our knowledge.
If they’re going to start teaching religion in science classes, then they better have some sort of research that’s been done to attempt to back it up as a theory. Because that’s what makes something a scientific theory…research. scientific research, not reading a really old book. (unless of couse said book as photographs in it, but I’m thinking Kodak wasn’t around back then…)
Hey guys, I wouldn’t get to mad at Rebecca, it’s quite possible that she was just really upset at the time she wrote this. Mabye she doesn’t want to blame her friend, so she blames us for stealing her. On the other hand, Rebecca- please do not allow this to stand in the way of friendship. My friends and I get along great, and most of them are believers of some sort.
Hello Cindy. Thanks for your response to my comments. I should have taken more care to differentiate between comments to you personally, and barbs aimed at your religion in general. My apologies for that.
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“I would like for you to pin point the moment in history when I infiltrated the government, started a war, or ended a life.”
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If I might be so bold as to substitute the second ‘I’ with the term ‘religious zealots’, then perhaps my point becomes clearer. You certainly seem to be a charming, reasonable person, but you’re part of an organisation that is doing real damage, now, in the world you share with billions of others. The people doing the damage use the same texts for ‘guidance’ as you do. I would argue that they adhere more closely to the scriptures than you do, because they don’t just select the nice cuddly parts to inform their morality, but take every word literally. And they act on it, to the detriment of the majority.
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“I AM aware that there are many worldly views”
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Yes .. I certainly didn’t mean to imply otherwise .. apologies if I was unclear.
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“I’ve done my research on a great number of them, to make sure that what I believe stands the best against cold-hard facts.”
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Thank you. I was feeling a bit wretched about giving you a hard time, but this sentence rather graphically illustrates the yawning gulf between those with a religious belief, and those without. I know my brothers in pasta hate long, rambling discourses, so I’ll keep it brief.
Basically, comparing and contrasting various religious texts, in order to confirm yours is the ‘best’ one, is intellectually dubious. Not the ‘research’ part .. that’s honest and shows intellectual curiosity. But it’s the rationale that’s twisted. You’re looking for “cold-hard facts”, but you only have three .. what’s physically written down in the texts you study, that a man called Jesus probably lived about two thousand years ago, and that many people place varying interpretations on the assorted texts. That’s ALL you have in the facts department.
Now, you may argue that what you’re actually trying to do is find the religious text that offers the best correlation between itself and the world as you perceive it .. which makes the most sense? .. which seems the most ‘true’? If so, then you’ve found the Bible is that text. But here’s the problem .. a lot of the Bible is de-humanising, self-contradictory, and patently absurd. Chosing such a text, warts and all, as the best of the bunch only begins to make sense if the god it describes actually exists. This is a being that believers variously describe as being eternal, everywhere, all powerful, invisible, three beings in one being, outside of space and time, unknowable to ‘Man’, yet quite happy to help little Johnny pass his exams next Tuesday. A being that created a perfect world, and then spent 6000 years smashing it up. A being that was happy to turn a blind eye to incest, murder, infanticide, slavery and rape, but would destroy entire populations because some of their number prefered ’shirt’ to ’skirt’.
I could go on, but you get the picture. The point is that your god doesn’t make any sort of logical sense .. he’s a mass of contradictions, according to the Bible. The rational explanation is that he doesn’t exist .. at least, not as advertised. But if the Bible is wrong, at least in part, and you’ve rejected all other holy texts, then what’s left? Atheism! The intellectual dishonesty is in cherry-picking the bits of the Bible you like, comparing the high-lights with other religions and non-religion and then claiming you’re only looking at ‘facts’.
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“Third of all, do not acuse me of blindly following it, because I can asure you I do not blindly follow anything.”
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Umm “Christianity is about READING the Word, and believing it to be true.” Sorry, but that sounds rather dogmatic to me, unless I’m mis-interpreting. If so, my apologies.
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Fourth of all, I do not hate. Hate is a futile waste of energy. People who hate waste energy that could be put to so much more productive use.
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Here we agree totally. I’m glad to have made your acquaintance and sincerely hope we part as potential friends. Good day to you.
@ Jesus Christ, your post reminds me of why I like this site so much. Thank you for being you. RAmen
You’re welcome, “rebecca,” if that is your real name.
I’ve never lost a friend because of a difference in religious beliefs. I have, however, made lots of friends (christians too) through my open worship of the FSM.
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My advice to you Rebecca: go to your local bookstore and pick up a copy of the Gospel of FSM (it’s available in hardcover now), and read His Noodly Word.
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Realise the error of your judgements, and learn to judge not, lest ye be judged, then maybe your friend will take you a little more seriously.
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St John the Blasphemist
Saint of Hardcovers
Was your relationship with your friend so shallow that a discussion on religion separated you two? I know that religion is a social taboo, but for good friends to avoid the topic is absurd.
@moochie RAmen brother.
Moochie,
You present a very good debate. I totally respect the fact that your arguement is logical, while it is also not offensive. I would like to say along the lines of your presumtion that others follow the teaching of the Bible than I, some probably do. I try to live the way God has set, but like all human beings with the nature to do what we know to be wrong (lie, think “un-Godly” thoughts, etc.) I falter. The Bible teaches that no sin may enter the Kingdom of Heaven. So no one is worthy of such, being that will all comit some kind of sin at some point (even the pope…who by the way to any Catholics, he was a Nazi at one point in his life…). But… “God so loved the world that he sent his only begotten son, Jesus Christ, to die, so that we might have eternal life” Jesus was both Divine and Human. He never sinned and therefore, when crucified, he was paying for the sins of the world, both past present and future. So people who condemn sinners, regardles of what they’ve done, they are not following the Bible, but rather contradict it.
And as for the Bible conterdicting itself, you didn’t give examples. So, to save you a bit of time, I will.
In the Old Testament God marks a lot of sins as punishable by death. Then in the New Testament, when Jesus comes acrossed a woman being stoned for adultry, as the Old says is to be done, he stops them and says “May he without sin, cast the first stone.” Why would Jesus, the Son of God, go against his own father’s teachings? teen rebelry? lol. No. Since Jesus knew he had come to pay the price for all sin, he knew this woman would no longer have to.
The are many rules and guidlines in Leviticus. Some say things like homosexuality are sins, others say eating shellfish is a sin… So since when do we get to pick and choose which ones we think should be followed? Well, it says that eating shellfish (and pigs and other things as well) is unclean and should not be done. these were dietary rules that were being set in place because back when the book was written, the didn’t have the same means of sanitation as we do today. The morality rules are still followed today, don’t kill, don’t steal, don’t be homosexual. Both were probably put there with the intent for them to be followed always, but they probably didn’t realize that in the future it’d be harder to get sick from eating such things. Of course, to be “on the safe side” one could follow these rules anyways, but none of it is going to send anyone to Hell since Jesus died for ALL sin, small and great. I think that’s the hardest contradiction for people to understand, because it’s harder to explain clearly.
I had a third contradiction, but I cant remember what it was. If you have any others I’d love to hear them, and hopefully I will be able to explain them.
:) as to the friends thing: definately. You seem to be an intelligent person, and have given one of the best opposition arguements of anyone I’ve crossed thus far. Total respect for that.
I wrote that way too fast, and did not proof-read. I apologize greatly for the numerous gramatical errors. I know you all despise that. :)
what kind of friend can’t deal with their friend’s religion? Sounds to me like your friend is better off without a snot like you
[not the rebecca who is the source of such great contention in this thread]
@ Kate: Kudos to you!
@ Cindy: “However, I would like to say that Jesus, wether you see him as Jesus Christ, Jesus the Prophet, or just plain Jesus, is a Historical Figure, and ANY historian who knows anything would agree, Christian or otherwise. However, there is no true documentation of said Spaghetti Monster.”
Actually, there are several former Church officials, historians, atheists, and other assorted members of intelligent society who are of the opinion that Jesus Christ originally was a mythical figure, and that the more human qualities were attributed to him later on. For more information on this, you can visit www.thegodmovie.com for their film on the subject, “The God Who Wasn’t There.”
And as far as the Flying Spaghetti Monster is concerned, haven’t you read the accounts of the sightings of him? I myself once had a near encounter with the Noodly One while dressed in full wench regalia in my college’s parking lot one night.