Spaghetti and pasta didn’t exist till the 500-900AD

Problem, Spaghetti and pasta didn’t exist till the 500 - 900 AD. Google it knucklehead. Funny, yet it still does not address the problem of irreducible complexity. Too bad :( He missed the whole point.

-LeapofFaith

228 Responses to “Spaghetti and pasta didn't exist till the 500-900AD”


Pages: « 14 5 6 7 [8] 9 10 11 12 » Show All

  1. 141 Just Pici Nov 24th, 2006 at 9:26 am

    From your subject line, it appears that you are not a native English-speaker (”the” 900 AD?). It is refreshing to see that not all right-wing religious fanatics come from America these days. I am guessing you are Italian, in which case, you should have more understanding for those of us who worship Pasta, for whatever reason.

  2. 142 PIXpocketsAA Nov 24th, 2006 at 1:57 pm

    hahaha. u were all shut down. “Spaghetti and pasta didn’t exist till 500-900AD” who ever posted that is a tank….haha, damn. this all has got to be a joke

  3. 143 Glastonbury Dex Nov 24th, 2006 at 6:02 pm

    Pasta = Manna. Duh!

    RAmen

  4. 144 Homo narrans Nov 25th, 2006 at 4:46 am

    yes, PIXpocketsAA, you worked out that this site is a joke. your cognitive skills leave us all in awe.

  5. 145 TOR Hershman Nov 25th, 2006 at 5:20 am
  6. 146 ParrotPirate Nov 25th, 2006 at 11:27 am

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7iQRFP_e90

    Great video! I especially enjoyed the shot of the Egyptians worshiping the orb with long noodly arms ending in hands. An obvious manifestation of His Noodliness, and in Egypt, of all places!

    I wonder: If you placed a dish of pasta at the center of a pyramid, how long would it remain perfectly preserved?

  7. 147 Davey Jones' Hacker Nov 25th, 2006 at 11:34 am

    “I wonder: If you placed a dish of pasta at the center of a pyramid, how long would it remain perfectly preserved?”
    .
    Depends. Am I present, and what’s the sauce?
    .
    Yum!

  8. 148 Chaos Nov 25th, 2006 at 12:34 pm

    @ Nowtheworldhasmeaning
    The pic of the 4,000-year-old pasta found in the link that you submitted cannot possibly be related to Him. He is much older. The wise pastaphets teach us “lo, this only have I found, that ‘He’ hath made man upright; but they have sought out many inventions.” Please note that while your pic bears a remarkable resemblance to ‘Him’, it has no balls – more like the god of the fundies.

  9. 149 Why Cough? Nov 26th, 2006 at 2:52 am

    It’s astonishing how some people such as LeapOfFaith will search for historical accuracy in a joke.

  10. 150 Mad John Kidd Nov 27th, 2006 at 1:16 am

    Recently unearthed archaeological evidence suggests that Pliny the Puny, a midget from the fifth century B.C.E., was an early Pastafarian scholar. “Documents recovered from cave deposits in the valley of Semolina near the river of Marinara have yet to be fully translated, but early indications are interesting,” says archaeologist Mad John Kidd.

    .

    The document does not seem to explain the origins of the FSM or even mention the number of followers of the Church of that period. It appears to be simply a collection of parables of early Pastafarians who were persecuted for their faith.

    .

    Already controversy over the document has erupted. The fundamentalists claim that it supports their belief that only red marinara sauce is acceptable with spaghetti and the far left still demands that fettuccine alfredo is the only true path to God. While the moderate majority maintains that both sides ignore the fact that either would be rather tasteless without the shredded Parmesan and garlic bread.

    .

    Here is an excerpt from the initial translations:

    .

    first parable

    And the old man planted his grains and his hops and cultivated his yeast. He built a stone fence around the brewery and a watchtower to oversee it as Our Noodly Lord suggested.

    Then a naughty horde came and demanded the old man give them all of his ale. He told them they would have to wait until the harvest before could brew the ale. So they beat him with their fists.

    After the harvest, they returned and demanded the ale. But the old man said, “I have boiled the grain, I have added the hops but the yeast has yet to ferment the ale.” So they struck him with sticks.

    Again they returned, after the batch had fermented, and demanded the ale. But the old man said, “The brew has been bottled but it must age for twenty days for the best taste.” But the naughty horde took the freshly bottled ale away and drank some down. They spit out the uncured ale because of the bitter taste. So they pummeled the old man to death with stones.

    And when the noble pirates came and found their party ale had been pillaged, they went out and smited the naughty horde. But His Noodly Goodness said unto them, “Fear not my faithful, there is no need to smite the unworthy for at the Great Feast of Eternity ye shall have none but the finest ales which flow of the Great Volcano while the rest shall suffer the stale flat ales of the River of Ignorance.” And the old man felt sorry for the naughty horde as he watched them drink of the bland ales while he sipped the pure golden ale and a silver stripper gave him a lap dance.

    RAmen

  11. 151 evangelicalsare'cool' Nov 27th, 2006 at 4:22 am

    hey, i don’t know if this has been posted already because there are just so many responses. But somehwere else in this divine website it mentions ’string theory’.
    Perhaps the late coming of pasta in it’s spaghetti form was because us as humans had only just managed to form a coherant pattern to what we knew was there, that allowed us to make our idols in the form of spaghetti.
    And just to show how much cooler the FSM than the christian version of God is, we get to eat spaghetti, which is alot more nourishing and tasty than a wooden cross.

  12. 152 Homo narrans Nov 27th, 2006 at 5:44 am

    string theory has been explained in several threads here as the manifestation of the FSM’s noodly appendage holding all material particles together. pastafarians, naturally, had worked this out long ago, but “noodle theory” seemed less marketable in the current scientific climes.

  13. 153 Penne Nov 27th, 2006 at 6:18 am

    Pliny the Puny? Didn’t he own a whorehose/pasta shop on Mount
    Vesuvius?

  14. 154 katie Nov 27th, 2006 at 7:18 pm

    not everything you read on the internet is true… and you weren’t around when pasta was invented so how do you even know?

  15. 155 Mad John Kidd Nov 27th, 2006 at 7:30 pm

    @ Penne

    No, you’re thinkng of the Roman Biggus Dickus, he owned the whorehouse on Mount Vesuvius. Pliny the Puny was the northern Greek scribe who was kicked off of Mount Olympus by Athena when she caught him looking up her skirt. Then he went to Italy and converted to Pastafarianism.

  16. 156 Wench Nikkiee Nov 27th, 2006 at 7:42 pm

    @Mad John Kidd Nov 27th, 2006 at 1:16 am
    “And the old man felt sorry for the naughty horde as he watched them drink of the bland ales while he sipped the pure golden ale and a silver stripper gave him a lap dance.”
    .
    RAmen Mad John

  17. 157 Penne Nov 27th, 2006 at 7:49 pm

    Ooooooh,……What?

  18. 158 triple a Nov 27th, 2006 at 8:55 pm

    I…….agree with Penne Eh?

  19. 159 The Flying Spaghetti Monster Nov 27th, 2006 at 11:35 pm

    You dare insult this wondrous religion of mine?

    You shall not get to taste the fruit of the grain in the beer volcanoes.

    You shall not see the strippers produced by my factory.

    For you shall be casted into a meatball-less place… You shall be casted into a hell…

    You shall be surrounded by the finest Spaghetti, you shall have no water to boil, and no boiler to use. You shall see what you need, what you want, and you shall not get it.

    Ramen

  20. 160 Skepticism Nov 29th, 2006 at 3:08 pm

    According to the Judeo-Christian tradition, God did not present himself as a corporeal being until the birth of Jesus of Nazareth. Going even further back, the monotheistic god had not revealed himself as the one true god to many peoples of the world until revealing himself to Abraham (I believe). Could it not be possible that FSM did not reveal his form until some time between 500 and 900 AD? Perhaps he always existed, but was not “known” until then?

Pages: « 14 5 6 7 [8] 9 10 11 12 » Show All

Leave a Reply

Connect with other Pastafarians

Recent Comments

Propaganda Buttons

Add these buttons to your site:



Contribute

The Church of the FSM is looking for content. Details here

Support the Cause

The Church is funded entirely by your purchases of FSM merchandise. Thank you for your support.

Purchase the Gospel

An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American

Misc.

Bobby's Personal Blog

Contact Bobby: Contact Me


Website monitor by Killerwebstats.com

 

Support the Arts:

Fine art taco photography



Creative Commons License

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 License. This means you're free to use the content but not sell it. More Details