now I hate spagetti. this site is not funny. not one bit.
-student of Giauque
now i hate spaghetti
Published by Bobby Henderson October 25th, 2006 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 158 Comments
158 Responses to “now i hate spaghetti”
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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Spaghetti is delicious, and yes it is.
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Get bent, Dr Seuss! Spaghetti is funny 24/7. Spaghetti is my waking thought, my lunch, and that which gives me indigestion induced dreams of volcanoes and stripper factories. Get with the program. Why not be a student of ti-oke?
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There is nothing more serious than His Noodly Appendage.
Ramen.
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Dear student: actually, the FSM is plenty funny. if my religous beliefs pissed you off i’m sorry. christainity is central to who i am. by that i mean its my middle name. no, literally it is. so if your offended THAT YOUR PROBLEM!
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This site is not funny. Not one bit.
You don’t see me laughing, stupid twit.
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I tried your religion and found it lacking.
My religion is better. It’s got more backing.
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We’ve got more money and we’ve got more souls.
What have you got? Empty pasta bowls?
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I once liked spaghetti and now I don’t.
I’m going to heaven. I bet you won’t.
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You’ll burn in hell. I’ll dance on your grave.
Can you feel the love like Jesus gave?
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My rhyme is now over. I hope you can see,
My pious ass is superior to thee.
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OK, not my sentiments, but I thought the poor bloke could use some help articulating his thoughts.
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OEJ
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Good, that means there’s more spaghetti for me! (Hey, what can I say, I’m Italian. I live on pasta.)
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Mmmmm. Spaghetti…. Mmmmmmm. Oops, you tricked me! The ONE TRUE GOD is THOR GOD OF THUNDER! I KNOW, because I feel it in my heart. How in the heck can you argue with that logic? Dang.
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Yummmm pasta, screw you more pasta for me.
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This post is in Haiku format.
Spaghetti monster,
Brings me starchy goodness and
Pasta nirvana.
RAmen.
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OEJ: Nice job. It’s almost like you were channelling Calvin Trillin.
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This site is not funny? LoL
Well if this site is not funny, you’d have to agree that christianity is. hmmm
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Yummm spagetti. You hate it, then there is more for us!
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so i was just hit by a thought how come all of theses people come on here and say how bad this religion is? I mean do any of you guys go on the their sites and post shit about their religion?
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good point, no actualy i don’t. Why? pointless. Why do they come here and preech… well i realy duno that..
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There once was a student from (I don’t know how to pronounce Giauque) Nantucket
Whose sense of humor said “F%@# it!”
He did not get the point,
And his nose was out of joint,
And empty of pasta was his bucket.
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Hmmm… replace “student” with “sea dog”, and there’s a verse for a sea-shanty pirate hymn right there. Nice one, saucy!
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‘now I hate spagetti. this site is not funny. not one bit.’
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Ah – I sense a war-strategy coming on.
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We need more plausible creators. Vegetable gods, fruit overseers, dairy deities and messianic meat. Once Student of Giauque is religiously opposed to all food, it’ll be a choice between seeing sense and starvation.
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(Might need an intravenous nutrition drip standing by, just in case.)
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Then make another creator: the dripping wet IV!!! Oh wait, we killed that guy with god(sss)
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FSM is no joke, who the hell do people think they are talking shit about our religion, we although tempted don’t talk shit about their two bit good for nothing “Cults” they pass as religion! I’m proud to support our Church! My birthday is this FRIDAY, which is great, i can think of no better day than our religious holiday to celebrate my birth! May we all be touched by his noodly appendage!
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@now I hate spagetti.
That’s so mature of you.
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@This site is not funny.
Then don’t read it.
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@Not one bit.
I think I’m gonna cry?
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-student of Giauque
-Steven
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Hate spaghetti??!!
Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face.
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Think about that long and hard. You don’t want to go through your life without spaghetti do you?
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wow, you hate spaghetti, what an amusing spin off.
shall we all start a church of everything so there is no food this guy can eat and he starves to death?
I bagsy starting the church of cheese. cheese goes well with pasta
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@Dunc
Heh, good idea. But if we start a church of everything, he’ll starve to death all at once. I propose that we do it one food at a time, just to draw it out. We have to start out with unrelated things, though. He’ll make it without cheese if he doesn’t like spaghetti. Personally, I am now founding the Church of Water. Let’s see how long he makes it without that.
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How about instead of creating another god for cheese, why not have him be a minor diety for the FSM. It worked for christianity.
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Sounds good, SH.
What these guys think is that they’re giving their God happiness whilst losing any moral values by insulting us. I’ll take the Beer Fountain and the Stripper Factory, thanks.
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Or maybe the FSM could send his only begotten son Cheezus to save the world and die in the pasta pot for our sins -oops, I think that only works if you’re christian.
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Good! More noodley goodness for us believers!!! :D
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NO Beer Volcano or Stripper Factory for JOO!
Which of course means more for us…so YAY!
Now go home and take your meds
RAmen
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LMFAO…Cheezus!
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I got the gospel of the FSM. It’s a good book. Oh, and STFU FSM ist teh pwnzors.
RAmen
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When I tell other religions this they give copies of their religious texts, but when I come here they demand $14.00 for a short little book…
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Yes, the Father, Son, and Holy (Pot) Roast. The Holy Trinity of the FSM.
RAmen
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Living without eating pasta? HERESY!
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Somewhere, spaghetti is weeping.
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While many Christian websites are hilarious (usually unintentionally) they cannot compare to the FSM site, especially the hate mail. This one made the pasta come out my nose!
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You may hate spaghetti, but His Noodliness loves you. If you deny this fact, then just remind yourself that FSM can always remove His Noodly Appendage and let you float off into the void.
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“now I hate spagetti. this site is not funny. not one bit.”
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We best be careful, Bush will probably accuse the Italians of hiding Weapons of mass Pastaruction and invade.
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I’ve been saving that all day…
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……OK…I’m sorry
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yeah i’m definitly gonna convert just becuase u don’t like spaggetti come on you can do better then that. don’t sink that low
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if you hate spaghetti, then i now hate lowercase t’s
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1. spaghettis good
2. ur dumb
3. this sites hilarious
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I agree – this site is not funny. If you’re looking for some real good laughs then you should check out some of the sites that endorse ID. They always have me in stitches.
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Well John, I don’t think we actually need to be told that,it is the most basic fact of ID to be humorous, and it’s barely even worth pointing out here.
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Maybe ID is a rather clumsy satire against religion using scientific vernacular as its vehicle?
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The real problem with telling Jesus Crispies that they are idiots is that then they feel persecuted and closer to Jesus, it is both a vicious cycle and a complete mind-f*ck.
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Or maybe the FSM could send his only begotten son Cheezus to save the world and die in the pasta pot for our sins -oops, I think that only works if you’re christian.
LOL!
Lunchlady, you’re a Cheenius!
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oh i’ve got me a chocolate jeeezus.. and, for the record, my friend has a pHD and he does human genome work, and he says FSM’s THE REAL DEAL.
i just hate when christians have any sort of power in government. that’s when they can do the most harm. if they want to sit in monasteries, sing, and brew beer for the rest of us, then we could all be a lot happier. have god! oh, by the way, didn’t mendel do that genetics shit, too?
things never change. god is constant. hallllllleluhfalluujah.
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Heisann One Eyed Jack!
First I must inform you that even the Pope said that there is no Hell.
Second, those people who wrote the bible also believed that the earth was flat…
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in search of enlightenment writes:
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“When I tell other religions this they give copies of their religious texts, but when I come here they demand $14.00 for a short little book…”
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My response: Lies are free. The truth will cost you.
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RAmen.
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Hey Ivan, in alot of early Christian art and mosaics show the world as round. It was only after the collapse of the Roman Empire that the concept of a flat world became popular again. Of course you cannot give the credit to the Christians spreading the word of a round world. This is a result of Greek enlightenment and Roman science. However the Christians can take some of the blame in the breakup of the Roman Empire and the repession of knowlege that followed.
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i agree with the sentement in this spagetti god
to belive there is a real one true god
it is humbling to my nature :)
i will pray over a bowl of spagetti at least one time a day
and may the spaghetti god live on!!
ps. damn you all we need more pirates the worlds global warming crisis isgeting worse we need to set up a registered charity to sponser a pirate.
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oooo ray and up she rises – oooo ray and up she rises ………..eeer- lie in the morning!!!!!
Pass the parmesan me heartys!!!
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It looks like someone has not studied the rule that comedy comes in three’s. For example…
A goldfish = Not very funny
A nun and a goldfish = Kinda funny
A nun, a goldfish and a plunger = Very funny
By that rationale, let’s look at His Noodlyness….
Spaghetti = Not very funny
Flying Spaghetti = Kinda funny
Flying Spaghetti Monster = Very funny
Thus, according to the theory of comedic three’s, FSM is a lark, a scream, a laugh and a half.
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Oh, come now. Spaghetti is far more delicious than you can ever admit and you will never resist its noodly joy forever. Besides, this site is completely within its creative bounds to make fun of philosophical theories that are masquerading as “science.”
ID was practially made to laugh at evolutionists, and now that science got in the last laugh with this creative twist, you are completely insulted. Typical, quite frankly.
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P.S. talk.origins is a wonderful place to discuss all of this stuff, if anyone hasn’t gone there, yet.
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I have been touched by his noodley appendage!The flying spaghetti monster is awesome, a creation of genius, its immenseness is immense! Also to the guy who got “pissed off”, the theory of evolution is not taught as fact few aspects of science are, its pretty much all the most logical interpretation of evidence. But that’s just it, unlike creationism there is evidence backing the theory of evolution and many of us would like to think the human race is not the product of Adam & Eve’s offspring’s continueous incest. And why are you all so offended? The flying spaghetti monster idea is barely more ridiculous than Creationism and Evolution doesn’t even necessarily contradict christian belief, after all everything evolved from something, but maybe God created that something.
Also whatever you believe in a flying spaghetti monster is still hella funny
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Don’t worry. He will crack soon. I can just see him in a store trying trying to fight it. Within a week he well come crawling back. They all do. He he he.
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btw is there actually anything a pastafarian shouldn’t do?
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This guy probably doesn’t like sour grapes either.
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A pastarian is forbidden to preach the holy word whithout wearing full pirate regalia. I beleive extreme circunstances(like having willing and eager listeners right there and you weren’t prepared) can get around this though, as long as you eat a large plate of pasta afterwards and say 10 Holy Noodles.
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@Ethel Wulf Hutchkinson
Excatly what I’ve been thinking all along. Why couldn’t God have made evolution a part of His creation and started the universe off with the Big Bang? This is all most of us would like Creationists to –consider– as even a possibility. I’d say that the probability of this occurring would be WAY higher than spontaneous creation of higher organisms, especially since humans’ brains are much more alike other animals’ than not.
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Don’t hate the spaghetti, hate the plate. Mmmmmmmmmmmmm, pasta….
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Livewire that’s what most people think. (outside the bible belt in the free world) They want to believe in god. They also know that science is right.
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The thing I like about Pastafarianism is that it involves a delicious foodstuff (pasta) into the ultimate lifestyle/religion. I mean, c’mon. What isn’t to like? Those who don’t like pasta are mad.
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And most Christians with out a sense of humour, and random idiots that feel like defending something the dont know or understand. I bet he is hiding in the confession box right now eating pasta.
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Wrinkles,
There are 8 “I’d Really Rather You Didn’ts” as listed in The Gospel of the FSM written by His chosen prophet Bobby Henderson.
Get It
Read It.
Dress like a Pirate and Live It.
All Praise His Noodliness
RAmen
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Livewire – I stumbled on Talk.Origins yesteday, and eneded up reading there for hours. Great site => http://www.talkorigins.org/
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Arrrrrgggh….I HATE YOU ALL! HATE, HATE HATE! Your bloody FSM Church is a FAKE!!! Don’t you realize the only true god is the Crawling Macaroni Slug!! Heretic bunch of idiots! I will declare the Holy War on you!! Embrace the true faith of the Crawling Macaroni Slug or thou shalt burn in the purple flames of the Disco-Inferno for 10.000 years!!!!
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I like FSM better, thanks. There is no Hell.
And the people are a lot nicer, too. Plus there are pirates. And pasta.
What’s not to like?
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i look at it like this
you can’t prove that god made earth
you can’t prove that jesus was god’s son
you can’t prove that a flying spaghetti monster made the world.
if this religion isn’t accepted………then why would catholosism be either????
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silly billy! you know you like pasta you just want to be original…..nice try :)
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I assume the person posting is referring to William Francis Giauque, who won the Nobel Prize in Chemistry in 1949. Funny that someone protesting the site makes a fallacious appeal to authority (for you logic buffs out there, sorry for the redundancy). Then again, logic can be so irreligious…
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I get the impression that he has serious “hate” issues. Hating spaghetti may just be the latest addition to his list. Apparently, he has little or no sense of humour and has made it his mission in life to let us know. The reference to Giauque is a bit vague I must admit. Something to do with the Third Law of Thermodynamics, I suppose. Since, the professor retired from teaching in 1962 this “student” may just be looking for someone to blame for being a tired old man. Sad really.
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fsm is cool and so are pirates so pastafarians are cool to
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young-republican writes : “you can’t prove that a flying spaghetti monster made the world.”
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Sure we can. We have it on video.
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OEJ
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“young-republican”.
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Hmm.
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Not so much an oxymoron, as just plain moron.
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lol@Davey
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re “young-republican”… Someone, I can’t remember who, said something like this about the tendency for people to become more conservative as they get older: “Show me someone who is old and liberal and I will show you an old fool. But show me someone who is young and conservative and I will show you someone who is just plain nasty.”
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- Brother Boyardee
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Hey last night after eating much past I had a vision…
What if the Bible got a little messed up after all those years of translations…
You see the Spaghetti monster actually came down to earth to hang out a little. And allowed a bunch of humans to eat some of it’s many pasta tenticles so that the power of the FSM could be within each of us! Well, eventually the FSM only had one more tenticle left & Jesus ate it! Hence they called it the Last Supper!
Now, of course the FSM continues on – even after all of it’s pasta was eaten – it’s the all powerful FSM & simply regenerated itself!
Yep, it’s all clear now – those miracles of Jesus day were made possible from consuming the magical pasta! LONG LIVE FSM!
Dang those translations really got things messed up….maybe one day they will discover the lost meatball scrolls & get things straigth! :)
RAMEN!
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Much as I hate to miss a chance to jump on the Kick A Republican In The Head bandwagon, I have to admit: young-republican seems to appreciated the point of the site perfectly. No real arguments with you there, y-r.
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(Except, of course, as OEJ noted, our video. And our graph. Arrrrr.)
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Last supper… spaghetti… like this? http://www.yellowlightman.com/dmc/gallery/albums/userpics/10018/Last%20Supper–Spaghetti-1024.jpg
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Damn, link didn’t work. Try this:
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http://www.yellowlightman.com/dmc/gallery/albums/userpics/10018/Last%20Supper–Spaghetti-1024.jpg
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Figured it out. This site replaces double-dashes with a long dash. Try this:
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http://www.yellowlightman.com/dmc/gallery/albums/userpics/10018/Last%20Supper-Spaghetti-1024.jpg
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Sorry about the goofs.
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This site is the funniest thing I seen in ages. You so-called Christions need to take a step back and listen to yourselves.
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MIke! Love the pic! absolutely love it! thank god for the miracles of computer pic manipulation.
On a slightly more serious note: young republican
Brrr…. scary.
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I think too many people think faith = religion. Look at all the top-end physicists, the ones tinkering with the stuff behind the very fabric of the universe. They’re disproving on an hourly basis what little there is left of the bible that makes any sense, but talk to any of them about where it all started, and they’re like to mention God. Because everything is just well put together. But if it wasn’t, then we wouldn’t be here and let’s not get into anthropomorphism. I’m a police officer, have been for a while and i see some pretty crappy stuff. If God expects people to thank him for half the rubbish i’ve seen go down then he should be next in front of a judge. Or the psych panel. However, i think that something somewhere lit the fuse that caused the big bang, then stood back and watched. Japanese scientists are now confident that within 10 years they can create their own universe from a black hole, so we could well be a similar product. I had a look at a few churches after my job started getting to me, maybe spiritual solace was what i was after. All the major religions seemed to have one thing in common; shut up and let us do the thinking for you. By the way, our doctrine is absolute, has never changed, will never change and is right, right, right. Which is why the earth is no longer flat (oh that was in the bible all along) the earth revolves around the sun (oh we always knew that) and i haven’t seen a witch burning in a while (well it was… metaphorical….. we didn’t really mean burn them). Stephen Hawkin presented himself and his ideas to the Pope (who is now an brown-shirt) who cogitated, ruminated got out his liquid paper and made it so quantum cosmology now works. Phew, lucky. If it wasn’t in the bible V4.20a/5 then none of these electrical products (which are the work of the devil) would work.
I don’t have a problem with faith, i have it. I have faith in my brother officers, i have faith in humankind (it’s kinda pale, but it’s still there) and i have faith that if we just got a little less intolerant, selfish, hypocritical and just plain ignorant, we’d come to see that all religions need to boil down to a few key things; treat everyone the same, don’t be such an asshole and help people that need it.
After the end of all that, i’m throwing my weight behind the FSM because he wants to think, to have fun, explore and live forever more in an afterlife filled with beer and strippers.
That’s the one for me!
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We’re not quite the full cult, however I do believe we have all the makings of a serious religion. (except for all the hate stuff and the tax breaks).
Hmm………wonder if your superiors will let you swap your uniform for pirate garb occasionally? Maybe while you’re directing traffic, if you ever do that sort of thing?
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Maybe directing Maritime traffic, at the horbour entrance perhaps. It would be ideal. All the shipping ropes could be ’spaghetti look’ as well.
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I’m thinking about rigging up one of those home-made hot air balloons, where you get a bag with a candle suspended below it, but of course it will be pasta-fied. Then the world will be treated to a vision of His Noodly Appendage flying over the landscape. When are the religious holidays? I’m if going pastafarian then i’ll need to observe the proper rituals. Where’d i put that eye-patch?……
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Do you know, I need to find out the religious holidays myself so I can book the time off work. I hope they respect my obvious religious needs rather than continue to brutally oppress my culture.
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Friday is our worship day. Beer and pasta on Fridays. Hey Bobby when are our holidays?
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when is RAmendan too, I have to have a pasta fast/feast on that say, maccaroni cheese for breafast, gnochi for lunch, taggiatelli for dinner and ice cream ravioli for desert :)
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Aren’t we just fridays, Talk like a pirate day, and RAmendan (Which I’m pretty sure goes from mid november to about february; long enough for a realllly big party)?
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@ All pastafarians, atheists, humanists, Brights, and free-thinkers,
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Ahoy there!
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I’m copying this post onto a few threads because I’d like as many people as possible to notice it. (Bobby, if you should read this, is there any chance of a new thread?)
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You might have spotted on these pages Richard Dawkins’ high-profile references to the FSM, unmasking himself as at the very least an honorary pastafarian and certainly a friend of pirates the world over. He’s done his bit for the FSM – here’s a chance to return the favour.
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His many books on evolution and, in particular, his recent book ‘The God Delusion’ have influenced a lot of people here.
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Anyway, here in Britain, one of our national newspapers, The Daily Telegraph, in conjunction with Morgan Stanley, is running the third annual ‘Great Britons’ awards. People are invited to vote for the British person they think has been the most ‘Great’ (somehow) in each of seven categories.
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Me salty guts tell me that a hearty lot of pirates’ll want to support their own and put their cutlasses behind Richard Dawkins, by far and away Britain’s noodliest man of 2006, and doubtless also he of the biggest meatballs.
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I nominated him earlier today, in the ‘Campaigning’ category. You can add your nominations by visiting greatbritons.org. It takes barely a minute and might help one of the FSM’s finest sea-dogs to the gain the legendary status he deserves. You can even put in a 50-word explanation of why he gets your vote, which would probably strengthen the case (if you’ve anything to say). If you’d like to know more about him, try visiting richarddawkins.net.
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Douglas Adams fans might like to note that Dawkins and Adams were close friends and that Adams credited Dawkins’ books ‘The Blind Watchmaker’ and ‘The Selfish Gene’ as having influenced his reasoning towards atheism. Dawkins wrote a ‘Lament for Douglas’ immediately after Adams’ death, and delivered a eulogy at his funeral.
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I’ve a second reason for recommending this. The Telegraph ran an article by regular columnist Charles Moor on Saturday that dismissed ‘The God Delusion’ as ‘fashionable’ and gave a very selective, wilfully interpreted representation of its content. It’s a good newspaper but pretty thoroughly conservative – not an obvious place for pastafarianism to thrive. In light of this, I think it doubly worthwhile to demonstrate the strength of support that Richard enjoys among the world’s many pirates to the Telegraph.
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(Note – I’ve left http:// off the website addresses in this post, as the first couple of times I tried to post it, it got stuck awaiting moderation. Hopefully this’ll help.)
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Nominations for the awards continue until November 24th. If ye can spare a second of plunderin’ time, set a course for greatbritons.org and add your cannon to a broadside for free thinking and the FSM!
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May His Noodly Appendage be upon ye all.
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RAmen
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Don Lardini said “I need to find out the religious holidays myself so I can book the time off work” the holidays are as follows. Pastover, which occurs on Passover(duh…), Ramendan, which occurs at Ramadan(duh…), Halloween(duh!!!), International Talk Like A Pirate Day, on September 19, and Holiday, which is pretty much all of December and January etc. If you doubt me, I have the FSM Gospel and im reading them right out of it.
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I thought Ramendan was the entire month of October. And someone on the discussion forum put up a bunch of saint days in the section about ancient lore and stories and such.
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Spaghetti has always been my favorite food…any kind of noodle is like a god to me.
I am getting a T-shirt!
This site is one of my favorites and I must link you up at my food site…ASAP!
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“When I tell other religions this they give copies of their religious texts, but when I come here they demand $14.00 for a short little book… ”
if you don’t have an extra $14.00 then you don’t deserve to belong to this religion.
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Er, Joe Blow…?:
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‘if you don’t have an extra $14.00 then you don’t deserve to belong to this religion.’
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Not *completely* sure I agree with that. I haven’t spotted the FSM discriminating against potential followers who are short of change. He might advise them to plunder some booty from a heathen, possibly.
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We’ll have none of this ‘No Scrubs’ Lopesian Mammonism here, thanks (drop in on http://www.michaelkelly.fsnet.co.uk/TLC.htm).
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$14 is about what Olive Garden charges for a plate of pasta. So, for twenty eight bucks you can read about the FSM and eat him too! Such a deal. What other religion can claim this? The marvels of His Starchiness never ceases to amaze me.
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Maybe God did in fact create our ancestors to evolove. Or maybe he didn’t, and we’re just an accident. If we are, I bet he’s kicking himself.
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If I just stop buying spaghetti, chicken alfredo, sweedish meatballs, and buy more mac n’ cheese and ramen instead I could get the desired $14. Well, here I am enjoying the wonders of pasta without my testament. How could you ever hate this stuff?
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dude, you’ve just ruined your life
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>so i was just hit by a thought how come all of theses people come on here and say how bad this religion is? I mean do any of you guys go on the their sites and post shit about their religion?
That’s because we’re secure enough in our beliefs in FSM that we don’t need to ram them down other people’s throats to justify it to ourselves.
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I’m betting he won’t like elephants anymore either:
“These parallels between humans and elephants suggest a convergent cognitive evolution possibly related to complex sociality and cooperation.”
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/6100430.stm
Damn the BBC…
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@chickenalfredo
“…I mean do any of you guys go on the their sites and post shit about their religion?..”
They won’t let us. Too insecure!
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No sense of humour, those christians.
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@chickenalfredo
Yeah, see having them comment here shows how open to debate we are and they are not… more often than not they will post a (really badly worded) rant and then not come back to take any further part in debate. This I assume means we only get the dumb asses, the intelligent ID fans know they would be walking into a debate they would only lose so they stay away.
Question: Has there ever been a post by someone of other-than-christian faith? (Yes christians, the “others”) Any muslim, hindu, budist etc posters out there?
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nah, and most Christians accept us and evolution, back around 1900 the pope actually wrote some letter thing saying that catholic now believe in evolution, so long as the ’soul’ was made by god. of course he kept it quiet, cos we all think the cathlic church is some kind of an evil, conservative illuminati…
the thing is, people dont leave hate-mail to us, they email it in, and they probably don’t expect to have a debate on teh matter, this isn’t a forum afterall, it’s just comments on an email…
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Ah, like a “fire and forget”-mail more like.
That’s pretty cowardly, can we have their email addresses then? ;)
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Well, perhaps for the sake of the argument I should take the counterpoint here and start arguing for ID. hmm… How to go about a loosing argument?
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At a guess replace all rationality and reasoning with a big spoonful of narrow minded dogma and start from there…
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Dunc… there are quite a few persons of religions other than Christianity and FSM who post to this board.
The posts I’ve seen from the Jewish community and a gentleman who is Hindu were literate, well-thought-out, and generally open-minded.
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thanks, good to know
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I’d just like to say that not all Christians are conservative and close-minded. Unfortunately, the more vocal seem to be, but we shouldn’t all be judged based on what they say. I’d be obliged if you didn’t paint Christians with such broad strokes, although I understand where you’re coming from. Thanks…
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@John Benson…
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You seem reasonable and courteous, so I don’t really want to get snarky with you. And thank you very much for the empathy.
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Sadly, when people who proselytize that they “turn the other cheek” come in here and start painting the posters here with broad strokes (such as “your all going to hell” and “your so dum” and “your all just KIDS”), the temptation for those of us who do not have “turn the other cheek” clauses in our personal religions/philosophies etc to… well, respond in part with the same broad strokes.
`
The difference being that we are not claiming to be followers of a loving, forgiving, “spare them, for they know not what they do,” God. Hence, pointing out their hypocrisy is irresistible. And since English seems to be missing a pronoun that means “those of you to whom this applies,” please bear with the vagracies of the written word.
`
So to summate… if the shoe does not fit, sir, we implore you… please do not believe that we are holding it up to your foot.
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Yes, exactly! When people email here and are all courtious and well spoken, we respond in kind, and have no ill feelings toward them. If, however, they are illiterate and imediatly start insulting us….well, then we can’t really resist the urge to yell back. Kind of a vicious cycle actually….
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Dont these religions these idiots support preach understanding and loving of all even if there beliefs are different? Then may I ask how we no supporting there religion are more conforming to its ideals then they are and they themselves are devout believers.
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The Flying Spaghetti Monster is better than a God. Also I have to say it annoys me christian people come on here and preach against FSM with the hate mail and stuff, but they also preach about everyone being equal and everyone being accepted. Also if they hate FSM so much why bother looking at the site??
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Also Spaghetti is excellent escpecially when it can fly, be a monster, be a food, and be a God all at the same time
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@Iamme
“Dont these religions these idiots support preach understanding and loving of all even if there beliefs are different?”
I think that is out of date now. Fire, hell and brimstone appear to all be the current fashion.
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We like fire too, but only to boil water, make sauce, and brew beer. Oh yeah, strippers need to wash too. Do we have to wash the spaghetti pot in heaven, or is that done for us miraculously?
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@nikkiee
indeed, especially when the pope goes and riles up another religion like he did
kinda like saying to Bu$h – “no no, that’s not how you start an apocalyptic war… *THIS* is how you start an apocalyptic war….” cue badly chosen quote about muslims…
way to go Benny, knew you had it in you to SNAFU spectacularly, still got your arm band?
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# Anna Oct 31st, 2006 at 3:16 pm
Yes, exactly! When people email here and are all courtious and well spoken, we respond in kind, and have no ill feelings toward them. If, however, they are illiterate and imediatly start insulting us….well, then we can’t really resist the urge to yell back. Kind of a vicious cycle actually….
# 117 Iamme Oct 31st, 2006 at 3:30 pm
Dont these religions these idiots support preach understanding and loving of all even if there beliefs are different? Then may I ask how we no supporting there religion are more conforming to its ideals then they are and they themselves are devout believers.
# 118 Any Name’ll Do Oct 31st, 2006 at 3:48 pm
The Flying Spaghetti Monster is better than a God. Also I have to say it annoys me christian people come on here and preach against FSM with the hate mail and stuff, but they also preach about everyone being equal and everyone being accepted. Also if they hate FSM so much why bother looking at the site??
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It’s because they are full of sh*t. (shortest and most accurate sentence I could think of )
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@Fr. Corpus Callosum Oct 31st, 2006 at 8:26 pm
Do we have to wash the spaghetti pot in heaven, or is that done for us miraculously?
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Fr.
Maybe thats what those in FSM hell do?
Iwill be a good pastafarian!! I will be a good pastafarian!!
RAmen! RAmen! RAmen!
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I think it’s very funny. Since humor is subjective, your point is moot. Sucks to be you, Mister Illogical!
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@Dunc: hmmm… Well lets start, rationality and reason aside, and a big spoon of pasta coated with marinara consumed. mmmm… That hit the spot. This spaghetti originated in the far east and was brought west to Italy along the trade routes constructed by the Kahn dynasty in the 13th century. The tomatoes in this marinara were dragged from the “New World” to Italy by Cortez in the 16th century. The meal was put together who knows when, but how can the FSM exist if mankind has been going on for a couple millenia before spaghetti was created?
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I believe that to really achieve credibility as a religion that the FSM needs some serious heretics to persecute. I therefore propose the Lasagnaist Heresy which proposes that while essentially the same substance, Our Deity is not Noodly but flat. Once there are enough adherents then we can all happily proceed with all the fun stuff like burning Lasagnaists at the Steak(sorry) and excommunications.
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“How can the FSM exist if mankind has been going on for a couple millenia before spaghetti was created?”
Do you really think that men have created spaghetti? Of course not. Our ancestors’ hands have been guided by His Noodly Appendage when He considered it was a good time for us to discover His delicious image.
It cannot be correct to believe that the FSM has created pasta according to His own looks. If this was the case, all spaghetti would be invisible – how would we ever know when they’re al dente? The fact that He gave us VISIBLE spaghetti is just another piece of evidence of how clever and benevolent His Noodliness really is.
RAmen.
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OK,stay with me here…If people who don’t beleive in the FSM hate spagetti, will that mean they’re going to go to the FSM’s form of hell? If so, would that be something like ”THE DAMED DIMENTION OF RICE”,where you just eat and eat and you think your full but then your hungry again like, 15 minutes later and so your doomed to keep eating rice for all eternity,without any tasty dipping sauces,may FSM have mercy on your soul kinda thing , or what? :0
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-And scrub spaggetti pots.
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With hard, dried cheese on them…..Stainless steel pots too,no T-Fal for the damed.
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And what, pray tell,is a ‘young republican’ are these in charge of the anti-pasta netherworld? Do they have horns or other pointy appendages as well?
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Not a word Cap’n Saucy
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If you had read the Gospel, you would know that Hell is very much like heaven, only the beer is stale and the strippers all have VD
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oOEeeewwww……yucky
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So no rice? I suppose no cabbage rolls too,hey?
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It is described as being “much like Las Vegas.”
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Would the ruler be Donald Trump,or does he just have the same hair? If Martha shows up will he kick her out ,fire her or just turn her over to the proper authities?
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Maybe they could rule together in a stale ,VD infested beer induced coma of a love-nest, with Joan Rivers as narrator. Now that’s my idea of hell.
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-J-O-O0OO-A-N R-I-I-I-I-V-E-R-R-R-R-S-S-S-S………………………A-N-D H-E-R D-A-U–T-T-T-E-R-R-R-R-RRRRRR……………..
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O-R W-H-A-T-H-EV-E-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-……………..
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step 1: remove large stick from out of your ass
step 2: laugh! It’s a fuckin’ joke!
:)
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Fellow Pastafarians,
Giauque = joke. Get it?
RAman
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both sides of this are insane. The FSM was formed as a protest to teaching ID in schools. Christians who are annoyed by this LIGHTEN UP.
FSM Believers, get a life. ITS NOT REAL.
BUDDHISM IS THE BEST!!!
hahahahahahaha i win
an eskimo ninja
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hahahahahaha noah has the right attitude
only its prolly a tree trunk not a stick
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dude buddah ate all the regular, non deity type spaghetti in the world, but the FSM ate him :-D
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FSM is very smart religion and i will preach the word to the masses. RAMEN
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Well, that’s not really a problem.
What you’ve got to worry about is, now spaghetti hates you.
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I love spaghetti even more when I joined the Church of the FSM. I put my two meatballs in gravy boats so they don’t drown. I am truly communicating with the SM, too. I think the FSM must be part snake, for my spaghetti wraps itself around my fork. I’m even losing weight on my new FSM past diet. Yes, as a Pastafarian, I walk pasta da refrigerator without stopping, pasta da cookie jar, and pasta da pantry…I’ve lost 15 lbs. in two weeks! Robert
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WAT THE FUCK DO U GUYS THINK US R TALKIN BOUT FUCK HEADS U R A BUNCH OF NERDS
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well i hate spaghetti on its own but i love it noodles doodles croodles roodles woodles qoodles soodles voodles loodles yoodles……………………………………………………………………… MOTHER FUCKERS…………………………………………………………….chow now love you bye bye mwha mwha……………………………………….. cu
nt lickers lol……………………………………………………………………..
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@freaky tasey
Hello. Thanks for dropping by and sharing a little piece of you with us…Chao!
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P.S. If it’s a tumor that’s got your “freak on” might I suggest that you perform a bit of DIY surgery with a shot gun…will remove the tumor, make you better looking and put your loved ones out of their misery…best of luck.
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@freaky tasey Mar 11th, 2007 at 8:28 pm
“WAT THE FUCK DO U GUYS THINK US R TALKIN BOUT FUCK HEADS U R A BUNCH OF NERDS”
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Caps key dear!
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And may you be touched by His Noodley Appendage where you need it most :)
RAmen
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@freaky tasey
“DO U GUYS THINK US R TALKIN BOUT ”
No idea actually…care to explain yourself in English?
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“…WAT THE FUCK DO U GUYS THINK US R TALKIN BOUT FUCK HEADS U R A BUNCH OF NERDS…”
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i believe the noodly appendages have guided me to be able to translate, so inorder to help the debate here’s my best effort.
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in pastafarian:
“…i am currently struggling to comprehend the nature of the debate here, i expect this is because of my low IQ or inadequate education so in order to bolster my fragile ego due to inadequacy issues I will label participators in this debate with a term that i find derogatory…”
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only a first go mind you the translation software’s not perfect…
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@Spider.
Pretty good translation that Spider :)
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I always get confused by tenses with the difficult ones. I got as far as
“The slaveboy, who is in the forum is a little teapot, short and stout, here is his handle, here is his spout!”
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HA – and they told me that Latin was a waste of time!
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You’re right, it’s not a funny site. Religion is a serious matter, and the Flying Spaghetti Monster should not be treated with disrespect.
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“”now I hate spagetti. this site is not funny. not one bit.”"
now I hat you. u r not funny. not one bit
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