You have GOT to be kidding me…seriously. The reason I ask, is because I truly wonder how you can conclude that a “Flying Spaghetti Monster†created and ordained life from before there was ANYTHING. I really would be interested to see your premises and conclusion in a semi-logical format. The other thing, is that I hope and pray that you realize your dreadful inaccuracy and pray that God would forgive you of your blasphemies. They are truly dishonoring at the least. Praying that you change,
The RkticFox
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
ay, all be praisin to the flying spagetti monster and his noodly appendace and wenches!
read up on the site and its PURPOSE before you slander it.
Jill,
They are all kidding, but few of them are kidding themselves. I was, however, amused that you managed to get the words “crap” and “throne” into the same paragraph. Surely, this was no mistake, but part of your fate. Without realizing, you have been touched by semolina.
AARRGH! I fele th’ envy growin’ in me, like a barnacle on a whale’s bum!
I am currently contemplating on things which are very toubling to me,
I wonder how you view your life in light of the fact that only too soon your life will cease as well as mine, and at that appointed time both our lives will have amounted to absolute nothingness. Contemplating the complete worthlessness of both our lives i struggle to find reason to take in that next breath, for you and me are but a squelch of static about to be tuned out. Our lives both lead up to the our deaths and no more will our influence be felt or or achievments mater. And as the sun about which our planet orbits goes nova all of life on earth will have been reduced to mere nothingness. Complete waste of time is what are lives our. Absolute horror is what it is. Unless of course you have encountered the simple undeniable message of Salvation in Christ Jesus. then every breath matters. And a great deal of people including yourself may shoot me down and mock, scoff, persecute me. Incessantly prodding me to prove my faith’s validity and existence. But my God speaks for himself, but he has said that those with ears may hear and those with eyes may see but their hearts will be cold and hard as stone and your understanding may never grasp the gravity of our situation on this forsaken ball. I break into tears as i consider our fates a waste of life and breath we are for what starts, ends, Unless you know the One who started it…
Dear Jill,
fear not that observable redshifts, star formation, galaxy distributions, and cosmic microwave background radiation measurements are all found to be consistant with Big Bang theory. Everyone knows that given any group of bored, over-educated scientists with too much government funding, no interest in broadcast sports, and with no member of the opposite sex to distract them can invent amazing feats of alchemy that would convince the brightest theologians of our time.
You might not want to connect Darwin to the Big Bang in public again; while he may have eaten dog crap a few times while on the Beagle, he had nothing to do with speculation that creation started with anything but sexual attraction of the fittest.
I pray to his Noodly Appendage that FSM will forgive your mocking critism of his followers.
(Please note that the US is creating an Iraqi democracy out of explosions as you read this.)
May you be forever blessed by FSM. RAmen
maybe your life will amount to absolute nothingness, although i seriously doubt it. my life won’t. my acheivements will matter, if only to my daughter and eventually her kids and my coworkers, friends, and lovers.
by the way, our sun won’t “go nova.” it will die an unspectacular death (and will probably outlast humanity) in about 5 billion years.
you are here, as well. noone is incessantly prodding you to do anything. i would prefer it if you would just can it, you and the rest of the christians who CANNOT take no for an answer. i am the one who feels persecuted by being forced by a reactionary minority to adhere to laws that follow “bob,” “dog,” “god,” whatever. i wish you guys would just do what you are going to do and quit trying to run everyone else’s life. come to think of it, that’s why this site is here in the first place, or had you not quite figgered that out yet?
You may mock the author of the letter that started this thread on his own Xanga website:
.
http://www.xanga.com/RkticFox
.
Enjoy
.
And mocked he should be … claiming that the FSM couldnt have created life before there was anything, yet his own ‘god’ supposedly did just that.
Hey I didnt know Darwin figured out that a big explosion created everything, huh and I thought the first evidence of the Big Bang didnt come until the invention of the radio, and that white noise was just it’s remenants. Oh well, after all the Big Bang is “just a theory” you know like our explantions for Gravity and Magnetism, but then again how do we know Gravity isnt just the Flying Spaghetti Monster’s Stringy Tentacles pulling down everything? You know to keep his creation looking spic and span, he doesnt want any of his precious pirates floating out into space. Yeah that’s it isnt it, I have just now thought up the true explanation for Gravity, It’s the Theory of Intelligeint Falling. THE SPAGHETTI MONSTER IS ALL WISE AND ALL CARING THROUGH HIS INTELIGENT FALLING WITHOUT HIM WE WOULD ALL FLOAT OUUT INTO SPACE!!!! RAMEN.
I think I’ve found a thread…these hate mails seem to be coming from, surprise!, teenaged boys who for some reason find our pastafarianism a threat to their belief in God. What? Their pastor’s only telling them what he tells them because that provides his paycheck?! You mean that if he doesn’t keep a crowd, he has no cash flow?! You’re KIDDING ME! C’est Impossible! C’est Incroyable! Surement Dieu would not let such a thing be true!
May their minds be wiped clean by the Touch of His Noodly Appendage. RAmen.
ok, so tell me how you can conclude that a “God†created and ordained life from before there was ANYTHING. I really would be interested to see your premises and conclusion in a semi-logical format.
C’mon, it may not be able to be presented in any kind of logical format, but can the christian theory be presented in a semi-logical format? don’t quote from the bible and what proof do you have left? only faith. so I have faith that FSM created this universe, enuff proof for ya?
the FSM can do anything your silly God can do, so I don’t know how you can be able to criticize it with your blasphemy while still believing that your God is real or better. There is just as much proof (or lack of proof) of the FSM as there is of “God”.
Hehe, Darwin inventing the big bang (not actually an ‘explosion’, btw Jill. How do people this stupid (or is it ignorant? No matter) still function? Are they allowed to drive cars?
Scarily enough, yes, they are allowedto drive cars Drunken Pirate. To Jill and the person who put up this hate mail: Open yer damn eyes already and see his great noodliness as the absolute!
You have GOT to be kidding me…seriously. The reason I ask, is because I truly wonder how you can conclude that a “A White Bearded Jewish Man†created and ordained life 4000 years ago. I really would be interested to see your premises and conclusion in a semi-logical format. The other thing, is that I hope and hope some more that you realize your dreadful inaccuracy and pray that The Flying Spaghetti Monster would forgive you of your blasphemies. They are truly dishonoring at the least.
Praying that you change, (into 16th cent Pirate Regalia)
Paul
i agree drunken pirate! they shouldnt be allowed to drive cars! and people here are vary ignorant! well the ones that are God this and God that! i don’t like god…if you read the bible…he’s accutily quite evil… why must we have wars? shouldnt your wonderful god protect you from that? did you also forget that god casted the plage upon his creation? i belive he did it for a laugh!
just my opianion….
~shelly~
“let me ask you something, when has an explosion created anything, never it destroys things.”
Seriously Jill you should just think before you open your bilge hole. This statement instead of being a valid argument just shows your ignorance of things like physics and nucleosynthesis. By exposing your ignorence on topics like atoms work and how this relates to the big bang you have undermined any future argument you may make. Dont believe in the big bang theory? Thats fine and perfectly ok. However, if you are going to debate something at least have a argument that has some logic and facts backing it up. Come with an informed statement instead of the factualy incorect argument you present. Your understanding of how the physical universe works is so lacking that I could never beleive anything you have to say about the metaphysical universe.
So is this place a joke or what?
If you read why it was created and what it’s all about, you’d understand and not have to ask the question. :) Be ye Touched by His Noodly Appendage. RAmen.
Why do u automatically believe i am a christian? I didn’t say i was maybe I just believe there is a God.
We assumed you were Christian becauzse Bhuddist fundies rarely send hate mail.
Whatever you are, please learn more about Darwin/the big bang theory before you post again. Thank you.
Crap. ‘because’, not ‘becauzse’. Stupid keyboard….
Belief does not equate with proof. If I truly believe in my heart that there is a diamond the size of a truck in my backyard, I would be happiest person around, merrily digging an ever bigger hole to find that diamond (forgive me Mr. Harris for paraphrasing you). However, the fact that I believe it is there, does not mean that it is.
Believing there is a Creator (whatever food group He/She/It might be) does not make it true. At this point in time, scientific evidence supports evolution. There is no scientific support for ID (no, Holy books of any religion do not count as scientific proof). When someone can provide solid, scientific evidence for ID, then I will 100% support teaching it in the classroom.
ID is thinly veiled religion, not science. When we begin accepting theories without scientific proof, we must open the window to any theory… and that includes Flying Spaghetti Monsters.
RAmen.