i can see that this is a joke, and very funny to show us how crazy one persons beleafes can seem to some one eles
but i think it as gotten way out of hand when you sale a book and other stuff
but nice to see that you can make money off of anything
just think of the pet rock, some one made a lot of money off of that too and it was just as dumn
Nathanial Reed
Be touched by His Noodly Appendage, Nathaniel Reed. Go in peace. RAmen.
I WANT to believe!
What’s ‘out of hand’ here is your spelling. I suck at it too, no doubt there, but….c’mon…..’sale’? ‘dumn’? ‘beleafes’??
In your honor, I’m going to play a trick on my three-year-old son. I’m going to secretly replace his usual virtual aquarium with the FSM Pirate Fish one to see if he knows the difference.
Please rest assured, Mr. Reed.
His Noodliness does not discriminate along income lines. An eyepatch of the finest silk and one of cardboard are equal in His eyes, so long as they are worn with the same reverence.
A filling dish of Holy Ramen, is accessible to nearly anyone. And if even a starving college student eats enough, not only will they be able to save enough money to purchase the sacred text, but they will no longer be starving.
And please do not disparage rocks, for in making Mountains, he created the substance to make pet rocks so they too, are blessed.
Go in joy and may you be touched by his Noodly Appendage. RAmen.
let the noodly appendage touch your stomach mr. henderob.
lawl grete speling mate
it’s pretty funny to spell THAT word THAT way. does anyone else notice how bad some posts’ grammar and speeling are? does our noodly master strike down the intellect of those who deny Him? it certainly appears so.
i said speeling. now THAT’s ironic.
Nathanial,
I disagree that we’ve taken this too far. We Pastafarians have nothing on the pope. FSM’s followers wouldn’t think of dredging up anti-Christian rhetoric from the last 2000 years to make a point or to offend millions of devout followers of their religion.
We like to sit back, drink a cold one, and watch W show the rest of the world what true christians are all about.
(not a sermon, just a thought)
RAmen.
Next time you try to make a point by boasting your oh-so vivid views on how “dumn” this website is, try learning how to spell it. Otherwise, you’re not very convincing.
Oh and… If its so “dumn” what exactly are you trying to accomplish by posting hate mail in the first place? Clearly you find it worthwile to take time out of your “busy” lifestyle(which probably consists of you getting spanked by a catholic preist in a confessional booth while you moan “thank you father, may i have another?”) to leave a post like this on a “dumn” site with “dumn” followers.
Say whatup to the holy man for me, ok?
peace.
If it is wrong for the Church of the FSM to sell items promoting our religion, then it is equally wrong for the ‘real’ religions to fear their followers into sending in money as we see on sunday morning TV each week.
.
Funny how the FSM blasphemers can’t write a post without exposing the faults of their own beliefs.
.
Ramen.
pasta was founded by the italians!!!!
and meatballs are made out of meat
so how in the world was the FSM be able to exist!!
people open your eyes and rather eat pasta than to worship it
Did you use babelfish or something Matthys? Let’s review:
.
Pasta was actually created by the Chinese, as evidenced by the recent discovery of 1500 year old noodles (or older) in China by archaeologists.
.
Meatballs are, shocking but true, made out of meat. If they were made of Tofu, they’d be tofuballs, wouldn’t they. Funny, that.
.
How in the world was the FSM be able to exist?
.
Simple. As your own grammar shows, “was the FSM be”, proving by Noodly Providence to you that he has always and will always exist.
.
We do eat pasta, as it is our obeissance to him. We worship the ideal of the FSM, and if you’d read the entirety of this website, you’d realize just WHY this movement exists…but we couldn’t trouble you to actually OPEN your MIND, now could we.
.
May the Noodly Appendage touch your Mind and let you see. RAmen.
Do you realise how much money is made off of Christianity. Yes, capitalisim is every where. Look at the shear amounts of gold in the Vatacin. Look at the money made from bible sales. Look at the profit gleaned from sales of the depection of Jesus on a cross. We both agree that money can be made from selling anything. Once again a bible purchasing hypocrite condeming someone for selling a book.
ARE YOU COMPARING HIS NOODLY APPENDAGE TO SUCH A ROCK?
maybe you should SALE a book about your BELEAFS and see how many people think it’s DUMN.
or maybe you should just buy a “Learn to Spell” book. it’s in the children’s section. on the other side of religion.
I wouldn’t want to be you when you stand in front of his noodly one..may you be touched by the noodly appendage before it’s too late. You will see what ‘a joke’ it is…
you guys are all nuts
before people go off insulting brilliant satirists for being “dumn” and “saling” books that make fun of other peoples’ “beleafs”, they should complete the first grade. this piece of hate mail “as” really made me laugh.
Why can no one protesting FSM use good grammer or spell properly?
Why is it that? Could there be any sort of correlation!!?
eh hehe ur grammor shur is gud! we shood git togidder sumtim and smok a sugar! Im surious!
Hoo, hoo! Hoo, hoo! Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs! Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs! Yeah, I’m nuts, but at least I’m articulate.
‘beleafes’ ‘eles’ ‘gotten’ ’sale’ ‘off of’ ‘dumn’
Hellfire! What are they teaching them in schools these days?
they aren’t teaching them anything, apparently…
Almost as DUMB as Whoever Wrote This…
Learn To spell!
Gyarrrrrrrr
My beleafs may be dumn or seem to some one eles but i think Bobby should be able to sale a book and other stuff if he wants.
Petting my rocks in Wisconsin
RAmen
PS What a dumbass
No beer volcano and stripper factory for you.
Yes you are right. Things got way out of hand when he starting sailing books. I mean, that is just silly. Shame on us and our nautical reading adventures. Shame…
I wish he hadn’t started sailing books. Here I am sailing boats, and I feel so behind the times…
learn to spell nathaniel
hah, if you think selling a book about the One and Only FSM, perhaps you should laugh at the irony of your inability to read/spell first…
Nathanial, may be touched by His Noodly Appendage and gain the knowledge of grammar/spelling. RAmen.
This guy is a product of the “new” school, you don’t have to pass tests just “try really hard” and you graduate.
And on another note I OWNED a pet rock, he was great and his care and training manual would leave you in tears when you read it.
AARgh me hearties!!
It be a wuunerfull day to be sure - sailing books seems like something that could only be more proof of the noodly one’s intervention in our lives…
Tacking a book into the wind would definately require devine intervention and the logical question is then is this the FSM equivalent of the whole walking on water thing?
Does complicate going to the bookstore though - would need to take a dinghy to get to the shelves - not to mention the fact that you are going to need a pilotage clearance certificate to use the library…
RAmen and a bottle of Beer
do you think it’s funny and dumb how religions take donations and sell merchandice?
you are all mentalists. but i respect you. peace/ramen
hi, could you please learn to spell before you write to this site saying how DUMB we are.
And He, with his great carbohydrate limb, spoke down to Jeff, three-time descendant from the first midget ever created, “Jeff. It is awesome up here.” To which, Jeff said, “But oh, my Tendrilicious Creator, can I come and join you? I have heard much of Your Heaven, and I spend my time doing nothing but thinking about it.” The great FSM replied, “No, you can’t come yet. Heaven is for dead people, and I forgot what it is I did that makes people die. I’m afraid you’re going to wait like everyone else.” Jeff started crying, and to cheer him up, the FSM touched him with yet additional Appendages. Because of this, Jeff’s stature decreased by five inches, and he was know until the end of his days as Jeff, The Shorter, By Miracle of His Noodly Touches.
Haha, So funny once again. People that think they can critisize somthing or make fun of somthing, should atleast have a 4th grade education and be able to spell dumb before they try to.
arrr we dont criticize your book
or do we hahahahah
nope we pretty much don’t care
A joke! what scarilige is this. Your religion is a joke. Is it based on scientific FACT? i thought not. No this religion is the only TRUE answer and anyone can see this. Please dont use such hate speech. Also about book sales, they are meger compared to your joke book.
You, my dear, do not even have a firm enough grasp of the English language to read your own damn bible. (Ooh, that’s a funny juxtaposition, isn’t it? Haha. I’m going to burn for that one, for sure.) Help fight illiteracy; please learn to read and write. I’m sure there are many fabulous programs in your area. Ignorant people are easier to control, I suppose… So sad.
It seems to me that a lot of people have a problem with spelling and grammer. Myself included (usually anyway). The reasons are easy to explain. None of the “hate mail” nut jobs are very bright and most of the pastafarians are laughing too much to type properly.
Me Hearties - not one of ye blasted lubbers can spell properly - it’s c-o-l-o-u-r, with a ‘u’ got it? Arrrr!
Shouldn’t that be “Pete Yellouwbeard”, then?
Halloween time.
The witches and goblins are out.
They celebrate being someone else time
and candy, sweet so sweet time
why don’t you get on your broom and fly
and jokes out the ying yang oh my.
People are unaware…songs we sang…
Musicals HAIR
or GREASE
or GOT TO BE THERE
oh shit, fuck off everyone just fuck off.
When you ask GOD why is it this woman gets so many miracles that she is sung about on the radio….
then you know…
until then, you don’t know
You can’t row…
it’s a long way
it’s a hoe
a hoe, dot dot dash…
Until death do you part.
People, ever wonder about why they sing about me on the radio?
Shut the fuck up.
Oh my god I can’t take it anymore! She’s making my eyes bleed. But I do want to explain something. It is perfectly ok for normal people to have a sort of apathy for grammar and spelling while making informal internet posts. However, someone who wants to say something stupid (aka send hate mail) had better hope to GOD that their grammar is perfect, otherwise I will rip them to shreds using everything in my copy-editing English major’s artillery. I will never pick on y’all’s spelling, cuz you guys are funny. :) I just pick on stupid people.
Thank you, Starbuckaneer! I can’t take anyone seriously if they don’t bother to write at least at a 6th-grade level. That’s all I’m asking for!
And despite the fact that it’s incorrect, I think the “ya’ll” spelling is used more commonly (in the south anyway, or just in Arkansas, or by my family anyway…or is it just me?).
you know, nathaniel, you should probably learn to spell before you tell everyone else how “dumn” they are.
OK, we get it already, the poor guy can’t spell!
Nah, y’all is a contraction for you all, so you break up the words you and all… hence y’all… but it’s a fake word anyway, so you can spell it however you want :)
You need to learn to spell corectly
I wonder if the Christian kooks will ever get it? Okay, for all those of you who can’t figure this out, I’ll write very slowly and carefully.
First of all, you have to remember that ridicule by parody is often the most effective form of criticism. The problem is that people with absolutely no sense of humor just can’t get it. Christians have spent centuries trying to convince everyone else that their religion is right and that everyone else is wrong, which is especially funny considering the fact that Jesus may very well have been invented some 30 years after his supposed death. There are absolutely no contemporary historical documents to prove that such a person ever existed. Pontius Pilate did exist, and the Romans kept very thorough records on who was crucified, but no one resembling the Jesus of the gospels was ever recorded. No historian ever wrote of such a person during the critical time after his so-called death and the first gospel. Furthermore, people who were crucified were not taken down and put into tombs; they were left to rot on the cross until their corpses fell off.
The FSM movement is a direct attack at the activist Christian idiots who have no respect for the beliefs or non-beliefs of others. After centuries of trying to tell others that their religion is wrong, it’s time for the Christians to take a good look at what they’re doing and think about the consequences of their actions. Maybe if you look closely enough, you may find that Christianity makes no more sense than the FSM. RAmen.
Hmmm, and whoever wrote the Bible made a helluva lotta money by now. Too bad he’s dead, eh?
Actually it was several guys, and they were dead long before it was sold.
I am a Christian, but not really a kook. I don’t agree with the maniacs spouting curses and praising Jesus in the same sentence. It seems like all this hate mail probably came from an insane asylum for deranged priests. There really are Christians with brains out there; we’re just hard to find because we can take criticism instead of flipping out like a monkey on crack.
HELLO dear world i came in the form of a post on the internet because i believe u would b scared if you saw my big tentically spaghetti thingys. i am real! i am god! so please stop eating spaghetti because this upsets me.
love from your creator
The pastafarian proclivity for pirate / temperature inversion proves as plausible as perspicacious sermons from any pulpit. Perhaps, pastafarians penchant for positing a protector of spaghetti is actually a proletarian promotion to propel one away from proscribed ideas, and indeed serves a protocol of confusion or protracted apathy. Pastafarians, prospecting the fringe element, preempts the here and now, preoccupies our senses, and makes room for a predominately darker force to preside. Pastaferians in fact may precede a predictably terrorist element, therefore may threaten not only principle but principality.
Obviously you’re no smarter than a pet rock, I’ll correct your grammar for you
First off,
Its beliefs not beleafes
someone is one word not some one
Its elses not eles
Its sell not sale
and its dumb not dumn.
If you need and future reference for grammar try looking in a dictionary.
LMAO. This has gotten funny. Firstly i would like to congratulate all of his Noodleness’ followers for being so loyal towards him, very touching. Nah seriously, i think it is great worshipping the FSM! I mean, if ppl can get away with worshipping 8 legged elephants, whats wrong with a main course that can fly and striketh thou down with his many wavy, noodly arms. As for those ‘unbelievers’, why would u ridicule others for believeing (think i spelt that wrong, sorry) in their own religion and god? do we ridicule you on forums about worshipping our oh-so mighty god, who lets us blow ourselves up in order to slay our fellow man? Lets face the facts, so far i have seen more evidence of the FMS being real than the all powerful God. TOUCH DOWN FOR COUG’S. Peace.
I sent Bobby miraculous photos. They were not taken but given by GOD and not just to me either. I asked GOD to show the world and for people other than myself to receive them.
So if you get a miraculous photo, just remember, Fatima can ask GOD for things. NO FAKE.
Now, let us get back to the reality of my life NOW…
I am the Rose Mary in the song the killing four sang…
or someone up to seeing if we would ever get back together.
Our parents were in the military, traveling and mine were school teachers transferred. We lost each other folks.
In some kind of attempt, we frantically held on for awhile.
Singing songs to each other and being told forget about it.
Well, love makes you do crazy things. Like Romeo and Juliet.
I almost killed myself. I hope you realize this. I took a razor to my wrists. God saved me from doing that. I am trying to make my own decisions and my parents won’t let me.
The killing four moves away to Palo Alto, Ca and I erased his address by rubbing it too hard on the return address part. I was like oh hell, what do I do now? I heard his voice tell me, go to the mirror, we can talk there. I was like, how did he do that? But then I realized too that I also possessed supernatural powers. So in many ways we are alike. We read each other’s minds and feel each others thoughts kind of like ET. That is the gospel truth.
Bobby, care to add to this? Make it your last reply.
Tell them the woman is so psychic that she even told me she would have three kids in the first grade and described them to me. She said we would lose each other and she would find me by the power of God of which Al Gore came to her house for the invention that would win her science honors of the emailing transfer of which she prayed to God to work so she could find me. Yeah, killing four, virgin hearts, fill your empty souls.
You know this is me writing.
Al Gore, came to Cathie’s house for an idea you are now using.
I got a never ending love for you….
and someone’s crying in a thousand dollar shoe.
On with the show though
on with the show
My get up and went got up and go
Never say the day is coming,
I can see the sun myself
I don’t believe in fairies
nor the yard elf…
But I see him every where
jellus is ok to spell
I know what he means and he meant it well
Attention:
Grape vine song
Grapes of wrath and do the math
My eyes will never dry from you
When I feel like a worn out shoe
This is the most retarted religion ever. come one, i eat speghetti for dinner, does that mean im eating your god? Christians have no proof that we have a god? HELLO!!! Archaelogical evidence, the Bible, and the fact that we are alive today. This religion is WACKED!!!! and im sooo mad that you got people hooked on this poppycock, it sounds like something a stoner would come up with.
its all crap and i think that when you do face Christ, he will renounce you as you have to him. I hope that people wake up and see that this is all crazy and spaghetti CAN NOT CREATE!!!! i create spaghetti when i boil water. how can something made of WHEAT!!! create wheat? its all contradicting. i hope you will find Christ and realize He is the ONLY Creator!!!
love in Christ
Stella and Buttercup
I agree with Stella and Buttercup. As they said, the only god is the Lord Jesus Christ! I hope you find out someday that Christ is the only way and he will change your life if you accept him as your savior and Lord. I have and it has changed my life. I am gonna pray for y’all and that you will see what is right and that spaghetti isnt.
In Christ,
baby_blues
The very existence of the pasta you eat is the proof of our God, the FSM.
You, most assuredly, do not create pasta by boiling water. That ‘creates’ boiled water, at most.
Your punctuation, spelling and grammatical skills have woefully been removed by the FSM, in his amused brilliance. That’s what you get for failing to believe.
Why is it that some people can not seem to grasp the concept of the FSM and what this site is truly about? Look for those of you too stupid to actually understand it here it is in a very simple format : ANY religion can be viewed as utterly absurd and without truth or merit, in the end FSMism is as valid as any other “religious idealism”. Now more to the point Creationism and ID do not belong being taught in public schools as science when they are nothing more than a way to have Christianity shoved down our children’s throats. If you want your children to learn about creationism and/or ID then I suggest you go enroll them in a private Christian School or teach them yourselves, as there will always be those of us who do not want those lies taught to our children.
Yo, Stella, there’s something broken in your head. The thing that allows you to correctly determine the undisguised intent in someone’s actions. You should get that looked at.
” Archaelogical evidence, the Bible, and the fact that we are alive today.” Archaelogical evidence points towards evolution. The bible is not evidence. You are alive today because your mommy and daddy got it on one night. (or day.) Anything else?
That Cathie chick is still psychotic. It’s amazing. I think she should be the subject of a college psych project… INFACT, I just might suggest that to a friend of mine who teaches at USF… Cathie, (or Fatima, or Sybil)dear, is there any input you would like to add for the sake of education?
Hey,
I’ve found the same inconsistence with the flying spaghetti monster, as with god.
The most important prove with them both, is that you can’t proof they exist, or that they not exist.
The only proof for something that does not exist, is that there is no proof what so ever!
The FSM will be the first one to admit that he may not exist. He’s really cool like that.
/
RAmen.
dumn? Really?
My faith about GOD is not a joke. When I pray, things happen and that is because I know God is listening. Now, my lovelife is something else. My love life if you call it that is like the song clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right, here I am, stuck in the middle of you.
So excuse yourselves from trying to appear so smart. Spelling is some game you play also. And that deserves a fuck off.
The so called dumb asses know God enough to know that a gold seal on their foreheads is not a fur seal with a ball on his nose in gold. God knows his chosen ones that are going to survive the end days. If you pray to God that is. If you don’t, then I feel sorry for you. These days are filled with power hungry tricksters who forgot that we all deserve happiness on this earth and not by money either. God is not about money. God blessed us all to be on this earth. God is about goodness and love and sharing and caring. So was I about that but if I get called stupid while others are getting rich off of me, then you have pissed me off.
Can I get rich off of you? That would be great! I need more money to bankroll my evil and foul lifestyle.
OM(FSM)
stella and baby_blues… YOU BLASPHEME!!!!
you say jesus is a god? when in fact (and i use that term loosely) your entire religion is based on the fact that he is the son of god!!!!
FOR SHAME…
tsk tsk :p
Oh and by the way, stell and buttercup, you say FSM sounds like something a stoner would dream up?
.
Have you looked at the christian messiah? (assuming he somehow is a caucasian that does not apparently come from jewish stock, as in the vast majority of paintings of him) he is the biggest hippy i have ever witnessed.
.
He preached a message of peace between all people? You ever talked to a hippy?
.
He thought he was the son of god? well, i aint met a hippy that far round the bend yet, but im sure there is one out there
.
It’s only a short step from hippy to stoner ;p
Yarr, ye speak truth, Starbuckaneer: that wench - though saucy - be right proper barmy, she be. At first, I were readin’ the commentary as though it were some dread-phantom spammer back from Davy’s Locker - there bein’ no Captcha for postin’; howe’er, I soon realized that she were real and barmy both.
Mayhap ye-olde denial-of-service be for what she’s wantin’!
Avast, ye dog! May ye be thoroughly massaged by His Noodly Appendage! RAmen.
Yeah, I really hate it when someone “sales” a book.
and mee hatez it wen peeple spleel wroongand used imprapre grahmre. ;D
Stell and Buttercup, hey “retart” it’s retarded not “retarted”. As for the FSM, how could he not be real? I don’t know what the exact basis for a religion is, but it has followers, a holy scripture, and evidence of existence. How can you sit there and say that this religion is bogus? What just because it hasn’t existed for thousand’s of years as Christianity supposedly has? Why can’t a religion be created in our world today, and how do YOU know it’s not true? You don’t, so don’t sit in front of your monitor on your lazy ass and criticize Pastafarianism when you don’t don’t what it’s truly about. For the non-believers with good grammar, then your very lucky to still be blessed by his Noodliness today (notice how just about everyone contradiciting us has either bad grammar or spelling?).
RAmen.
How about butternut squash? HA HA, shaped like men. Did you ever notice that? SQUASH ha ha ha, for real man.
Yeah, I know. I know already. I am around retards all the time. I have very little patience now due to the overt stupidity of the masses. ALSO! HEY, na na na na good bye.
Maybe good bye is never good and maybe we’re all a bunch of turds that won’t flush.
AHH where is GOD when you need him?
OK, GOD, bring us all together here like of one mind or that.
Like all of us say the big cheese is coming, smile and say cheese. Like why don’t we all find a cushion and just sit or just sit. Why don’t we all find some real love and have some real laughter and find some real purpose in life besides dying with our boots on or off. Hey, killing four, gel and are you gelling?
Jelling killing four? Jellus jelling? See? They can’t stand it when we rise above their bullshit.
Spaghetti monster, I wish.
“sale a book” — instead of attacking that pathetic grammar,
heres a link to hooked on phonics.
www.hop.com
choose “beginning reader”
Wow! You can see it’s a joke! Want a medal? I’ll sale you one any time, man. *rolls eyes*
Saleing takes me away.. to a place… I’ve always heard it could be? I can’t remember the words. Darn.
Wow, this guy just doesn’t get it, does he?
Now i can see how one would think this is a joke, but I am seriosuly considering switching to the Church of The Flying Spagehtti Monster, i even went to barnes and nobles to buy the gospel of The FSM, but sadly they did not have it, i think that you shouldn’t down a persons beliefs or anything like that, it is after all (in america anyway) our choice of what religion we choose to be
Did she say Jesus jelling? Gellin’ like a felon? I’m like MA-gellan I’m so gellin’… I LOVE that commercial… come to think of it, maybe that’s why Jesus was so mellow and friendly to everyone… he was rockin those gel things in his sandals… sure makes the travel on foot associated with missionary work a LOT easier.
jellin?…=jelly?
mmmm jelly… port wine flavour is the best
been so long since i had jelly.
Do you think the FSM would be mad if I made a desert pasta, with chocalate sauce, icecream meatballs and jelly snake noodles?
THE TIME HAS COME TO ASSEMBLE THE MASSES AND ATTACK THE OLIVE GARDEN WE MUST FREE OUR BRETHRAN.
TIME HAS COME TO ASSEMBLE THE MASSES AND ATTACK THE OLIVE GARDEN WE MUST FREE OUR BRETHRAN.
i just farted (safty)
Forgive me for leaving two of the same comments my the FSM have mercy on me
I can see that people need religion & stuff, but I think it has gotten way out of hand when the bible is the most circulated book and other related trinkets sell in the billions.
‘but that just shows that you can make money off of anything.
Just think of alternative medicine; people have always made a lot of money off of it and it is almost as dumb.
Well. to start WHAT THE FUCK WAS UP WITH YOUR ‘CREATIVE’ SPELLING! Evidently you have not been touched by His Noodliness’s Noodly Appendage, unlike those of us wise enough to see the truth and bow down before his Noodliness. No Beer Volcanoes and Stripper Factory for you.
RAmen.
OH MY FSM!!!! A Butt Pirate!
about as dumn as the beleafes that speling is gotten out of hand…
someone eles must have been crazy as u to say that peeple use got speling.
yeah ur gay….
Here’s “food” for thought…..
Malachi 4:1
For, behold, the day cometh, that shall burn as an oven; and all the proud….. hmmm… an oven?
My mom makes this great BAKED spaghetti.. PRAISE THE LORD… Vengeance is mine!!!!
Ever heard of spell check?
LMAO! Well, this is my first post (and first time on this website) and I thought replying to this ijit.
Nathanial, stay in school (public) or get out of school (christian). If your spelling is naturaly that bad, then you will have a hard time in life.
Brothers we must be tolerant with this heathen, his stommach has not yet been touched by His Noodly Appendage and he is not able to see the shining lights of the holy meat ball glowing in the sky. Ramen
Well, this is kind of sad.
There’s a famous joke: the Devil is walking along a road with one of his minions, when they see a man up ahead. As they watch, the man bends down and picks something up. “What did that man pick up?” asks the minion. “Oh, just a little religion,” says the Devil. “Well isn’t that a problem? Shouldn’t you do something?” asks the minion. “No,” says the Devil, “I’ll just let him organize it.”
When I first heard about this religion, I was so excited that I straight-away bought a car sticker for myself and one for a friend. I’ve been telling everyone about it. But now I read this post (the first one I’ve read on this site). And yes, there are some funny bits, and yes, the poor guy desperately needs a spell check.
But really, many of you are acting just as elitist and self-righteous towards this poor person as any born-again I’ve ever met. You’re right, he’s wrong, and you’re just going to rub it in until he bleeds. Is it worth it? Do you feel better about yourselves now?
Here are the first 3 I’d Really Rather You Didn’ts (taken from Wikipedia). How many of them can you find in this thread? How many of them have you committed yourself?
1. I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Act Like a Sanctimonious Holier-Than-Thou Ass When Describing My Noodly Goodness. If Some People Don’t Believe In Me, That’s Okay. Really, I’m Not That Vain. Besides, This Isn’t About Them So Don’t Change The Subject.
2. I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Use My Existence As A Means To Oppress, Subjugate, Punish, Eviscerate, And/Or, You Know, Be Mean To Others. I Don’t Require Sacrifices, And Purity Is For Drinking Water, Not People.
3. I’d Really Rather You Didn’t Judge People For The Way They Look, Or How They Dress, Or The Way They Talk [or SPELL], Or, Well, Just Play Nice, Okay? Oh, And Get This In Your Thick Heads: Woman = Person. Man = Person. Samey - Samey. One Is Not Better Than The Other, Unless We’re Talking About Fashion And I’m Sorry, But I Gave That To Women And Some Guys Who Know The Difference Between Teal and Fuchsia.
I like the whole RAmen bit, though. That’s fuckin’ funny.
- The Pointless One
If you wanna read a harsh post, read the “I just saw your fucking website” thread!
About the spelling. This has been a constant theme with the postings, of obviously funsamentalist christians, to this site. I believe the reason is that religous indoctrination of these kids/people takes up a lot of their time. Obviously everything else, for example basic education in the three Rs, is probably considered secondary to this religous instruction by their mentors. I don’t think most of us are trying to be elitest. Far from it.
But a lot of the fundi posts are just regurgatation of religous right brainwashing. Maybe some of us react pretty strongly to that. Most appear to try to do with humor though.
RAmen
ps Besides they came here and started picking on us first.
See even we make spelling mistakes.
That does seem to be the present dilemma. Try and be above the name calling and offer a non-patronizing argument or take it down to the nuff nuffs level.
.
From Salon; “surprisingly, some intelligent design advocates have actually welcomed Dawkins’ attacks. William Dembski, for instance, says his inflammatory rhetoric helps the I.D. cause by making evolution sound un-Christian.”
.
They will spin anything they can to “demonize” evolution.
If you mean “fundi” I use it as abreviation. Typing fundamentalist or ism all the time is a pain in the fingers. I suppose I could asterisk all the time. lol
Do you honestly think that this is going to make everyone suddenly go, “Oh no! I’ve taken this way too far. Let’s start a petition to get that wasteful book off the shelves!We can replace it with copies of… oh I don’t know… The Bible?”
No. It’s not. It’s just going to make people collapse with laughter at your wholesale abuse of the English language.
I would LOVE to see the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster removed from bookstores and replaced with the Bible… Barnes and Noble sell the Gospel in the Humor section. Seems like a good place for the Bible.
.
RAmen.
It is my job to patronize people who misuse the English language… although, I am grateful to them as well. If it weren’t for them, there would be no copy-editing jobs for me. Ironic how I’m indebted to the people I loathe the most for providing me with a high-paying career that fulfills my paper-correcting addiction….
HOWEVER… when someone writes a nasty letter they deserve to be ridiculed for their illiteracy. Consider it karmic.
To be fair Starbuckaneer, Nathaniel’s letter was hardly nasty. And he’s such an easy target. And you seem to reserve your condescension for illiterate letters which are anti-FSM, ignoring the vitriolic illiteracy of many of our fellow Pastafarians. Besides, he probably hasn’t even read the responses.
Nathanial Reed
I can see it was a good giggle a few thousand years ago but don’t you think all this Christianity has go a little out of hand, I mean there is a lot of people selling books and other Jesus tack, making lots of money.
It is also responsible for for several very unstable leaders in powerful positions (I never said Bush if you reach that conclusion yourselves that arn’t my problem).
I absolutely ignore the spelling errors and functional mistakes of my fellow Pastafarians! But this is because we are mostly writing casual “chat-style” responses. Formal letters, especially those meant to insult people, should always be written using the best technique possible. I know nothign about math and science, and I don’t try to pretend otherwise. However, if I needed to use, say, long division to prove a point or to insult someone, I would look over it first. He just gives us more reasons to make fun, and that’s not fair to him, and he should know that. Besides, I could just say “Hey, dude, you’re a moron!” but it’s more fun to point out exactly WHY… I think people should have it clearly spelled out to them (ha! English humor) exactly WHY they’re dumb. You may have noticed, however, that at first I was so appalled by the illiteracy demonstrated in EVERY piece of hate-mail.. and that now I’ve come to accept it, and I have moved past condescension and on, instead, to everyone’s favorites: cynicism and sarcasm. These are much more entertaining.
Indeed they are. Ispeshully sarcasm.
I feel that a lot (not all) of the preachy and “burn in hell” letters have been written by the young-ish (adolescent?). I think their illiteracy is a result of preachers considering the indroctrination of “biblical principles’ (is that term an oxymoron or just moronic?) more important than teaching them to read and write. Besides if they are taught basic literacy skills, it may not be good thing for their masters. I mean come on, next thing these kids will be wanting to place their own interpretations on the bible, will be able to read other points of view correctly and will be wanting free will/thought ect. The congregation numbers keep the money rolling in. We can’t have them straying.
RAmen
re We can’t have them straying.
Not that it is likely as they have all been terrified about going to hell. Personally, I call that child abuse.
There’s currently a debate here in the UK about faith-based schools (an oxymoron if there ever was one). Freedom of religion and religious expression is enshrined in human rights; why can’t freedom from religious indoctrination be similarly respected? I dream of a day when it will be a criminal offense to force-feed children in this way - it’s such a harmful thing to do. Of course, the “major” religions will resist, kicking and screaming all the way - they’d be extinct within a couple of generations if we could get their hands off the youngsters, after all.
.
Mind you, I dream a lot of things, and I take great comfort in the knowledge that the dream involving myself, the Minogue sisters and a couple of buckets of warm custard is statistically more likely to come true than the one mentioned above. And if nothing else, there’s those Stripper Factories to look forward to…
.
RAmen to that!
Well said Davey. RAmen. I’m in Oz and in the past few years the zealot infomercials have taken over the TV channels on Sunday mornings, when I suppose a lot of kids are watching while mum and dad catch up on sleep ( now they would be a rarity). I say bring back the cartoons and let them use their imagination for fantasy not fear. Mind you I haven’t actually had a telly for about a year now so I’m not sure what is current but if we are following the States along that path, as in many others, I shudder to think.
Again
RAmen
ps my dreams don’t involve the Minogue sisters but apparently there are male strippers in FSM heaven.
The reason that we pastafarians need to sell merchandise to support our religon is that it is a PROTEST not a joke. We are protesting the teaching of ID in public school science classrooms not just trying to make people angry. If we don’t have anything to show people they probably won’t take us seriously.
The whole spelling thing is totally dead. How about everyone forgets the whole subject and debates using reason instead of arguing about whether it is OK to make fun of other peoples grammer.
I completely agree with you, nikkiee