If I believe you are going to burn in hell for eternity if you fail to do something and I know what it is your supposed to do but don’t tell you what it is you need to do then I am a monster of the worst kind. Your problem is that you do not want to belive that you might go to hell because you know what the remedy is but you’re not prepared to take it. You’ve got it backwards. It is the Christians that know how to help you but don’t bother to because they just want to get along with everybody that you should be sickened by not those who are prepared to be mocked by you as long as they can help you make sure you get to heaven. It’s my job as a christian to lead people to Christ and I count it a blessing to be mocked in His name. Mock me all you want. I hope we can have a good laugh about it between singing songs of praise to the Lord God Almighy in heaven.
Peace.
Peace.
Steve
Maties! Hell is on Grand Cayman! Also a nice place! A little short on pasta, but no shortage of cash.
I was on a plane to Cayman once, when the pilots carried black plastic sacks stuffed with booty, filthy lucre, cold green cash, collected at a religious revival in Miami that very day!
Makes an old pirate pine for his hornpipe, although the Spanish main was amatuer stuff compared to these hornswaggling rapscallions called X-ians!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Deryk, I am a devout agnostic and never believe anything without it being proven, though I, of course, have my ideas of what I would like there to be in the end (though they aren’t very developed, as I waste little time thinking of hypotheticals that are neither here or there and will never be proven one way or the other) they weren’t built upon any major world religion.
That said, I think that originally the hell that Christians believe in was intended only for those whose “finite” wrong doings created a legacy or some sort of social stigma, or set into action a chain of events that lead to a more lasting and enduring suffering for others. I’ve not sudied this particular notion and it is just a thought.
With this in mind, how long the legacy endures is really up to us. Aside from forgetting about it, we can ultimately either die with this planet when the sun engulfs it or colonize space/other planets…But we have plenty of time to decided that.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
How can anyone believe in the Christian god if you can’t see/touch/smell, etc… his being?
Christians and Muslims are the same damned thing. Fools. Petty little spoiled rotten children that stamp their feet and wail if anyone dare show how ridiculous they truly are.
I’ve seen spaghetti with mine own eyes and have found it to my liking.
I have been graciously touched by His Noodly Appendage.
Get over it guys. Open your hearts and allow His Noodly Goodness in.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I can’t wait untill the hym book comes out then we can sing them on our missionary adventures (dressed in full pirate attire of course)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Just showing my support for the mocking of Steve who has so sadly been brainwashed by an evil religion.Thats fact.More people have been killed, tortured, persecuted ECT over religion than for profit.
Religion is very dangerous…JUST SAY NO to religion
RAmen
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
All religions except the one TRUE one Tomatoe. Which is, of course, PAstafarianism!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
oh yes…and how can you have a lake of fire??? That makes no sense…do you mean a lake of lava?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
TO: ElmotheStoner
Its the message thats important.You can say lake or lava either way the meaning is the same.
The meaning of that post is:My God(FSM) is just as real as any other, therefore his wrath should be feared even if hes made of noodles because it can not be proven that he does not exist.All thats required is faith.
RAmen brother elmo
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
When will you people learn? Everyone else has it the right way, your just wrong.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
So you believe in a God who is so enlightened he damns people in the depths of hell forever. get a sense of humour!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
If going to heaven means I have to spend eternity with a bunch of Christians, then I’m happy I’m not going….
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
The first Midget created was also the first human to die, ever. As he lay down, fatally stabbed by a saber-and-pasta-fork-toothed-tiger (as creatures were closer in His design to All Pasta in the old days,) he was afraid. The FSM was aware of these abrupt changes in the world, and asked what he was afraid of. “My Lord, I have no idea what is happening to me. I am aware of your Beer Volcano and Stripper Factory, but yet, I still feel as if I may never see these Great Creations.” The FSM sighed, and said, “You’re just making all that up. Stop it. Someone might overhear you, and start to believe that some of you will go to some place that’s the exact opposite of what I have in store for everyone.” The FSM was correct, and the dying midget was indeed overheard by a Manic Idiot. It was here that mankind first developed the idea of Hell, and it was here that all humans developed fear-based ideologies.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
yeah you go on beleving on an internal image that has been forced upon you, look back , then you will be able to see forward. educate yourself, use wikpedia, and relise that the FSM is the true god
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
hehehehI’m quaking in my pegleg i thought Christians were supposed to be accepting… its funny how many aren’t
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
and I believe you are phsyco hypocrite “Don’t bash my religion! Your religion sucks! Don’t make fun of Jesus! The FSM is a doo dooo head!” [that was you by the way incase you thought i was talking to myself (i only do that on sundays)]
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Huzzah for the days of worship!
T F S M I F
h l p o t r
a y a n ‘ i
n i g s s d
k n h t a
g e e y
t r
t
i
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Dear Steve,
First, let me state for the record that you have a wonderful name. Many great people have been named Steve. You share a name with Steve Irwin the Crocodile Hunter, Steve the security guy from Jerry Springer, Steve from Blue’s Clues, and many other great Steves, including my late Sheltie, may he rest in peace with his Noodlieness. Unfortunately, Steve, “If I believe you are going to burn in hell for eternity if you fail to do something and I know what it is your supposed to do but don’t tell you what it is you need to do then I am a monster of the worst kind,” and I believe, Steve, that you have VERY bad grammar. I know what you are supposed to do, and, according to you, I would be a monster of the worst kind if I were not to inform you. Your sentences are awkward and do not contain any of the necessary punctuation. There is something to be said for stream of consciousness in writing, but you obviously do not posess the skills of, dare I say it, James Joyce or Toni Morrison. The following words are spelled incorrectly: “belive” (beliEve) twice, and “Almighy” (AlmighTy). Also, when speaking from a Christian perspective, the words “Christian” and “Hell” need to be capitalized, as they are proper nouns. You have no grasp of pronoun reference, which makes many of your sentences incomprehensible. You will not be able to successfully argue your point if we, the readers, are not able to distinguish about whom you are speaking. Also, your first sentence lacks parallelism and needs semi-colons. I would make the corrections for you, but you’ve completely lost me, and I am unable to make sense of any of it. I just feel sorry for you. It must suck to be illiterate. Please revise and resubmit if you would like to be taken seriously.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Um, by that I mean…. ARRRR!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Think about this: Given that there is really a place like the christian heaven which of course isn’t) and those christs go there after their death, this place must really be crowded with people like Steve and all the other hate-mailers, so this place sucks so bad it cannot be heaven anymore. RAmen!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
best religion EVER.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I have been reading these hate-mail posts and comments for a couple of weeks now, and I’ve been having a great deal of fun. I usually try to communicate using the best grammar I can, but I’m not infallible. I sometimes also misspell things. I think that some of the commenters are using internet chat lingo that, thus far, I have neglected to learn. In the spirit of trying to figure out just what these people are saying, I looked up “pwnd” at http://www.urbandictionary.com. 1. pwnd – tense of pwn.
An internet chat language variety/version of the word “owned”, used in the sence of beating/defeating/outclas sing someone. Usually used in games such as Counter-strike or on messageboards when a user posts arguments or insults that can’t possibly be counter-argued.
Steve, you have been pwnd, like a pony, I might add.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Ooh! I have learned something new! I appreciate “chat lingo” as well and I can be quite lazy while typing, however, while trying to achieve a smug sense of superiority, it is best to use good grammar. Steve sucks at life. Now, on to this new word I have learned. Why “p” I wonder? It’s right next to the “o” on the keyboard, and it doesn’t make the word any shorter. Ah, the mysteries of language. Does http://www.urbandictionary.com also have a thesaurus? So that I may look up new and interesting words with which to describe people like Steve? I must investigate.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I sing good love songs too and the killing four was not the only one who could belt one out.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Oh and you’re making us cry our eyes out…
animals kill their babies
people kill people
barbarians….
some just like doing it in style and getting medals for it.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
LOST WORLD
Can’t make you take a drink
Can’t make you slow down
Can’t make you listen
Can’t take a joke clown?
There has to be a sign
The kind to make you think
And now I can slow down
and take a drink
cause the love this world offered me
made a bloody MARY
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
AndI believe you have the Iq of a dandylion. But you don’t hear me pointing it out.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Don’t talk about dandelions like that! Dandelions don’t rhyme when they write poetry!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I’m almost speechless about Bobby’s Last Reply’s entries. That’s saying quite a bit. Ok, Bobby’s last reply, you win. I’m not sure what you have won, but it’s yours. Please go celebrate somewhere where you don’t have access to a computer…or anyone to reproduce with.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I’m with you djjack (obviously from Iceland,) I can’t take it anymore.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
FYI, Bobby’s Last Reply… I don’t think I can read any more of your comments. I’m taking my toys and going home since you’re not playing nicely. I don’t even know what game you’re playing. (Maybe if we come back tomorrow we’ll have the sandbox to ourselves again. Shhhhhhh! Don’t anybody tell her!)
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Yes, I am also going home. I am going to read Revelations and pray and never come to this site again. So, your work here is done. Please go away. You’re scary.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Would someone explain to me this whole FSM thing because i would rather not have to jump on you like steve, and i would really like to understand where you guys are coming from.
thanks geo
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“And then we’ll rent a nice french bomb to prove them out of existence”
The more I visit this site and read the hatemails and replies here the more I am convinced that all religious freaks need treatment. Lithium would do fine I guess..
Go get a life and let your self get touched by his noodly appendage. for me: I WANT to believe!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I posted this in the wrong place it must be his Noodlness mis-directing me.
Geo,
The board is self explanatory really. Most of the people on this board are of a sceptical opinion. While no one puts down the right to faith, we do not feel that any person of a religious bent has the right to grievously inflict it on anyone. Enter the Kansas City school board, who wish to teach intelligent design as a science in direct opposition to the THEORY of evolution. As there is no basis in fact for ID to be taught as a science and is entirely based on faith, blind faith at that, Bobby Henderson told the Kansas school board about the FSM again an entity based entirely on faith and he also proved using faith based articles that as global warming increased that Pirates decreased, however I digress, Bobby stated quite rightly that as the FSM was based on “facts†in line with ID that it should be taught in school also. This has made Christians the world over in turn angry and perplexed.
They have shown all the facets of Christianity, with a few exceptions, by damming everyone and promising all sorts of dire punishments from their kind and loving god, thereby showing a basic lack of understanding of their own religion and lining themselves up roughly to the right of Muslim fundamentalists.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Ummm,
I’ve got a question for any poor unenlightened christian out there:
If the devil rebelled against God, and is his immortal enemy, then why does he
a) still exist? Surely any self-respecting omnipotent (from a breakdown of its components, all powerful) being could vaporise any opposition, otherwise how can he be omnipotent?
b) torture those who have displeased god? surely he’d give them a big pat on the back, a nice cool drink, and direct them to all the strippers, sacriligeous comedians and party animals (oh, and the beer volcanoes, cant forget those). Why the hell (:P) would he boil, pitchfork, and generally brutalize his apparent allies?
c)like the smell of sulfur? I mean, that stuff really smells, and i cannot see any intelligent lucifer-esque being really wanting his fancy silk cloak to stink of the stuff. I mean, come on…
Oh, and just out of curiosity, is it really true that there are states in America that only teach creationism? Cause if there is, you poor buggers.
Sorry for the rant…
RAmen
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I love the old ‘burn in hell’ threat. What are souls made of? Paper? Wood? If they’re our consciousness how does it actually burn? Does The Christian God turn our immortal souls into charcoal on the way down?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Whats with the “bobbys last reply” freak? Reminds me of really bad poetry. I have a problem and Im hoping somebody can help. One of my operators failed to pitch for overtime on saturday. He is one of the particularly lazy ones. I would love to take him to task but he phoned me on saturday morning and told me the FSM reached out his noodly appendage and stopped his car. Since I am a devout pastafarian I am now left with a moral dillema. I feel my loyalties lie with the FSM but this particular person has never shown any noodly qualities before and he might just be taking the mickey. Should I give him the benefit of the doubt.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Is it safe yet?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I’m not sure, but if anyone asks, I’m not really here. I’m at home reading the bible.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
hell is where the heart is.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I do not need you to worry about what might happen to me after life, because my Dumpling God will take very good care of it, for sure. But you may need to worry about yours because,from what you stated, YOUR GOD appears a bigot.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
OK. Steve… Stop bothering us. We pastafarians are peaceful. You have tried repeatedly and failed to change us. If you don’t like this site and think that it is disgusting, then why do you spend so much of your time on it? We pose no threat to you. Please find it in your heart to accept those with different beliefs. May you find the love of His Noodly Appendage. Ramen.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I wonder if this guy Has actualyl returned to view his comments, pity if he hasnt.
And as mentioned in an earlier post, If your god is so vain and petty to send people to roast in hell over such minor things as not throwing away all rational thought in favour of blind obedience to him, Then he doesnt deserve to be worshipped.
What makes god so right anyway, if he was an all powefull being, howcome his beliefs are “right?” They are just arbitrarty rules, much as the sort of rules those in power impose upon the peasents working to support them. Not neccesarily right, but hey, theres nothing anybody can do about it, .
If god exists, i would not imagine him in this way at all, but If This is indeed your god, he is nothing more then a Psychotic Tyrant.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
isnt it funny, that systems of belief, ostensibly created to sooth, unify and uplift humanity seem only to irritate and polarise people in an argument.
.
surely any sensible, sane, REASONABLE person could discuss this topic with no difficulty.
.
instead, we have mass violence around the world, between many of these belief systems. in rarer cases, we have violence beween these believers, and those that subscribe to an entirely different belief system (atheist). At the very least, in all cases, the dialogue degenerates into mindless insulting.
.
most of those rare few, on either side, who can manage a coherent argument get bogged down in massive rambling discussions that have little to nought meaning to the other participants of the ‘discussion’.
.
those few who try a more lighthearted analysis of the situation just raise the ire of their more extreme opponents, who react to the fact that they dare oppose, not what they oppose with.
.
now, i share one of the more populist views expressed on this website. namely, i believe that faith has no place in science.
.
by its very definition, faith requires the belief in a non-verifiable idea, something that should transcend the need for tangible proof, and touch a person to the deepest levels of their psyche/soul/meatballs.
.
science, by contrast, centres on the idea of any result, any theory, being able to be proven, and reproduced, to the satisfaction of all observing.
.
evolution is strongly suggested by the observable nature of selective breeding (incidentally a technique practiced by many good christians, muslims, jews, buddhists, hindus, and almost any other religious devotees you care to name) around the world.
.
faith by contrast varies across the world. it cannot even settle on the number of divine beings.
.
the simple answer is religion is not reproducible. miracles are by their nature deeply personal, individual experences.
to claim that religion, any religion, has a place in science destroys the very meaning of the word science.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
I believe in a God that will only let people into Heaven that have a strong abiding DISBELIEF in any type of god.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
God in any text means one that over rides in the end.
To prevail in the end.
Crucifixtion only indicated he was right about us.
That we had forgotten how to be good and kind
and serve our Lord.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Oh, for His Noodly sake! Bobby’s last reply, I can’t make sense of what you’re saying. And believe me, I can make sense of almost anything. Either you’re some nutcase who really believes whatever nonsense you’re trying to spew, or you’re a nutcase who is just producing incomprehensible, seemingly fundamentalist Christian jibberish to see what we’ll do. Either way, you’re not reaching whatever audience you’re trying to reach. You may have to really consider the prospect that you need psychiatric intervention. Best of luck to you.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Will the FSM smite me and banish me to an eternity in a steaming vat of carbonara if I make manicotti tonight?
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Thank god he didnt make us all creationist freaks.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
“Could it really be a lake, anyways? I mean, how big does a lake get before it becomes a sea or an ocean or whatever? Wouldn’t it be crowded? There aren’t that many Jews in the world, so there’d be a lot of people in this supposed “lake.—
/
“Hell is other people”
Like or Dislike:
0 
0