If you truly knew what awaited these foolish mockers after they are seperated from the Lord for eternity you would not look forward to it with glee. You would weep for them. You would dedicate your life to sharing Gods love with them. I am sickened to my heart by this website but it is not man we fight against; it is the evil one, the father of lies who has tricked these poor people that we are at war with.
Steve
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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If your God created you in his Image, he gave you a brain. Use it instead of being bamboozled and befuddled by Pseudo-science that claims to know exactly how things happened “6,000″ years ago. Decide for yourself!
May you be touched by His Noodly Appendage as you seek real knowledge.
You are obviously confusing the FSM with The Father of Lies. Or are you saying…..Burn the heratic!
The idea of religion is to create a social ground rule of how you are supposed to behave to other people. For example the Ten Commandments. Which in principle are fantastic rules to live by. Then over time more story’s where added. Then twisted for the use of population control. I mean life in those days wasnt easy. So you tell people that if you believe in my god/entity you will have a fantastic afterlife where you wont have to get up at silly o’clock in the morning and all those people you have seen die due to disease and age will be waiting for you……
So to be a bit more blund Religion is just crowd control/people control.
So that would make a preacher a Propaganda minister.
Bwaaaaa… hahahaha… Bwa hahaha ha ha ha…
Oh, make it stop…
i’m gonna pee!
Bwaaaaa… hahahaha… Bwa hahaha ha ha ha…
They may be contemptuous fools, but these christian folks aye be funny, wouldn’t you agree me maties?
Another Christian at war with someone. I don’t know who they’re at war with, but they probably have brown skin and believe something different.
Actually, according to Jewish beliefs (off which Christianity are based), Satan is an “accuser” in God’s court. Satan’s job is to test people to ensure they are worthy of God’s graces and eternal life in Heaven. Isn’t it funny how the Christians twisted Satan from an angel ensuring that only the good get to Heaven to an evil monster aimed at destroying all good? This is an exact quote from the Jewish Encyclopedia:
“Such a view is found, however, in the prologue to the Book of Job, where Satan appears, together with other celestial beings or “sons of God,” before the Deity, replying to the inquiry of God as to whence he had come, with the words: “From going to and fro in the earth, and from walking up and down in it.” Both question and answer, as well as the dialogue which follows, characterize Satan as that member of the divine council who watches over human activity, but with the evil purpose of searching out men’s sins and appearing as their accuser. He is, therefore, the celestial prosecutor, lawyer who sees only iniquity; for he persists in his evil opinion of Job even after the man of Uz has passed successfully through his first trial by surrendering to the will of God, whereupon Satan demands another test through physical suffering.
“Yet it is also evident from the prologue that Satan has no power of independent action, but requires the permission of God, which he may not transgress. He can not be regarded, therefore, as an opponent of the Deity; and the doctrine of monotheism is disturbed by his existence no more than by the presence of other beings before the face of God. This view is also retained in Zech. 3:1-2, where Satan is described as the adversary of the high priest Joshua, and of the people of God whose representative the hierarch is; and he there opposes the “angel of the Lord” who bids him be silent in the name of God.
“In both of these passages Satan is a mere accuser who acts only according to the permission of the Deity; but in I Chron. 21:1 he appears as one who is able to provoke David to destroy Israel. The Chronicler (third century B.C.) regards Satan as an independent agent, a view which is the more striking since the source whence he drew his account speaks of God Himself as the one who moved David against the children of Israel. Since the older conception refers all events, whether good or bad, to God alone, it is possible that the Chronicler, and perhaps even Zechariah, were influenced by Zoroastrianism, even though in the case of the prophet Jewish monism strongly opposed Iranian dualism. An immediate influence of the Babylonian concept of the “accuser, persecutor, and oppressor” is impossible, since traces of such an influence, if it had existed, would have appeared in the earlier portions of the Bible.”
Perhaps the true Satan is the one who tests man’s will to do the FSM’s bidding: religious extremists, perhaps?
SATAN! AT TEH DISCO!
Posts like theese don’t really help christianity at all, just think about it for a minute, why would anyone care if they were going to hell if they didn’t belive in it? I don’t think this site is mocking God, its just mocking people who want ID taught in school. this still isn’t exactly christ-like, but its not blasphemy.
I don’t think ID should be taught in schools, because its not science. Just for the record, I am christain and belive in classic evolution. The bible was written thousands of years ago. And it was written by humans, theese people were insired by God, but they still wrote it. I think that God just didn’t care what those people thought about scince, he just wan’t to get acroos what was right and wrong to them. Maybe I’m wrong, but I honestly don’t think it matters in the end. Jesus never said anything about how the world was created. I think that a trully faithful christian can belive in God without the help of ancient science. I HATE the cliche that christans are unscientific creationists, I hate it I hate it I HAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTEEE it!!!!!
I hope to become a scientist and try and figure out with my own mind how God’s creation works. And to the person who says God is a demon, the so called Holy Wars like the third crusade are about as unchristian as you can get.
A WARNING TO ALL… MY god is the REAL creator of all that exist and like other so called gods he is also vain and vindictive so you better kneel before the FSM or you will have to walk the plank into an ocean of fire.
RAmen
The flying spaghetti onster totally pwns Jesus’s ass.
Arrr! I do be sayin that all these uber Christians be off on another rant! I do be quite sad that all they ateeempt to do about it is discriminate against everyone who doesn’t beleive in “their” supreme, holier-than-thou, amazingly cheesy, cloud flying, thunder bolt throwing, disciminatory bastard of a god.
Aye, Ncik666, and to mention a few religions called “evil”:
-Wicca
-Thelema
-Satanism
-New Age
-FSM
-Neo-paganism
To note, none of these has ever sacrificed any human being, yet God of the old testament encouraged sacrifices of all types, though he is very fond of animals. Mmm… BBQ.
I would say christians are the ones more likely to do human sacrifices in the western world. No doubt.
The FSM saw the cathedrals being built, and he sighed. “These places are built in the image of a being, like myself, but less noodly, and much more angry.” He saw the earth cut up for stone and wept. He saw the trees becomed flattened and looked away. He saw the stained-glass being cut, and he felt more misunderstood than ever. Donning his Eyepatch of Changes, he swooped down from behind an invisible oregano cloud, and made his changes. He later told of his deed to Blackbeard, his horribly-unconcerned prophet, actually, more like a friend he just enjoyed talking to alot: “My friend, blackbeard, with facial hair packed with black powder, and a cutlass for a dining fork, I shall tell you a secret.”
Blackbeard heard this, and instantly became twice as drunk as physically possible, or rather, according to the FSM’s changing of all Breathalyzer readings.
“Those stained glass windows you see, they do not appear as they physically are.”
The FSM explained further, that all stained glass windows appear to be of holy scenes, but only appear that way to the human eye. They all depict, in fact, scenes from the Kama sutra.
excuse me but arnt you breaking one of gods law in that little speech of urs, i would go back over it and check, but you would get confused due to all the contradictions, not 1 person truly knows the meaning of chritionaty, u sicken me,LOng live the FSM RAmen
If your God is going to be so totally fucked as to not enjoy a good joke, well then I don’t want a part of his stupid little heaven. Uppity prick.
If you don’t understand some thing, kill it.
The killing four swears to GOD
and now he finds his match is burned.
Well she burned as long as she could
and what do you expect out of wood?
ASSHOLE
Yeah, well I don’t understand people who call themselves friends and do you wrong either.
I don’t understand why the killing four likes to irk me so.
I don’t understand where the willow tree is
and give me the axe next.
I am trying to understand what makes me want to pile him
with the rest when he claims he is the best.
I don’t understand a lot of things but praying to GOD
never hurt no one.
Those who love GOD obey his commandments.
So killing four,
who is it you want to kill?
Thou shall not kill.
Helnman’s mayonaise brings out the best
but this hell man I can do without.
Actually the reason Statues of Mary weep is because of me
don’t you fucking tell me, I will tell you.