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Jesus loves you guys

Published August 14th, 2006 by Bobby Henderson

Hey, I was you website though a form that was arguing Christians vs evolution. Then someone said what about FSM and we learned of your weird clan thing. I went to you “hate mail” section and was sadden by what some people said and how they displayed Christians as Hippocrates. But, I’m hoping you put me into your “hate mail” except this is more of a love mail letter. Knowing you will make fun of this and maybe mess with words I will say what I have to say. When I was looking though your site I literally started to tear up thinking of what you guys are doing and how you are mocking God. because I know that if you were to die today that you would all go to hell. unless at one point you declared Christ as your lord and savior. I just want to say i guess is that God loves you no matter what and that I will pray that you may come to accept Jesus in your heart and I know that this will most likely not effect you but, I had to try so God-bless and keep you safe and out of harm and remember no matter how much you hate him he loves you two times as much :)

PS email me if you put this on your site (and pirates are awesome) -Erik Jackson



71 Responses to “Jesus loves you guys”

  1. We're all just waiting for the hammer to fall. says:

    I can’t believe someone used the Council of Nicea as any evidence at all! The Davinci Code is not a history text-book!

    Besides that theory has had its behind kicked in so many times its not funny…. so STOP IT!!

    God is real
    The Bible is literally true (6 day creation and all.. I mean all)

    Not going to defend this or why am do believe these things as I don’t have the time or energy to do so. Besides I don’t believe you can prove God. But I do believe you sure can disprove evolution.

    Ps: Mutation and Evolution is different.

    Hell = place without God

    Posted by Mc

    Here comes the hammer of fallacy.
    1)If the bible is literally true, I should give my daughter to sodomists to be raped instead of guests in my house, I’m allowed to take slaves from the countries around me (here i come Canada) and lastly:

    “God is not like men, who lie; He is not a human who changes his mind. Whatever he promises, he does; He speaks and it is done.” – Numbers 23:19

    “So the Lord changed his mind and did not bring on his people the disaster he threatened.” – Exodus 32:14

    2)”But I do believe you sure can disprove evolution.”
    A: I believe, that makes it so, I can’t be wrong.
    B: Many years ago, people believed that the earth was flat. They were wrong.
    A: Point being?
    B: Their belief didn’t make it so, thus beliefs may be wrong.
    A: Shit.

    3)”The basic mechanisms that produce evolutionary change are natural selection (which includes ecological, sexual, and kin selection) and genetic drift; these two mechanisms act on the genetic variation created by mutation, genetic recombination and gene flow.”(wikipedia) Mutation is a vehicle of evolution, fuckwit.

    4) Prove god is on Earth, else Earth is hell by you’re definition.

    http://elroy.net/ehr/fighttheright.html for the fellow pastafarians, RAmen.

  2. Aaron Eden says:

    Aaron; I would venture that you would disagree with those who believe that Chrishna, (an Indian messiah), was crucified to atone for the sins of mankind. The crucifiction of Jesus depicted in the Bible was stolen directly from many earlier myths. It was old news then, and it is old news now.

    You have to understand that I see your heaven as just an obvious mind-deadening and mind-controlling bribe that never has to be paid.

    That’s the difference here, isn’t it? I have no fear of death, but you won’t accept the concept. Understand that superstitious beliefs do not solve real world issues.

    Crishna was not born of a virgin (miraculous birth, not born from the seed of man). Crishna was not perfect. Crishna did not perform miracles. Most importantly Crishna did not triumph over death, as did and does Jesus. That’s the difference here. :)

    I have no fear of death either, but I do have a fear of seperation from God and from the love of God. If you knew this love you would understand. But see… you all dismiss it out of hand without really seeking it.

    You say you seek it, by using your eyes for a few minutes, and saying it isn’t there. But if you truly sought with your heart, (not fooling yourself, or trying to fool God or others), you would find something.

    Matthew 7:8 (KJV)- ‘For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.’

    I also know what you’re going to say ‘Did you see him rise from the dead’?

    Well… did you see the American Revolution? For that matter, did you see the big bang?

    Seeing isn’t everything. When it comes down to the christian v/ atheist argument, that’s the problem. The christian life is a life of faith (believing without seeing), while atheism is just the opposite, not belieivng without seeing. Atheists are nothing more than those without faith, by definition.

  3. Steve Bowen says:

    Aaron…Aaron…Aaron. You just don’t get it. No man was ever born of a virgin; it is not genetically possible. Nobody has ever been perfect; it is not humanly possible. Nobody has ever performed a miracle; it is not physically possible. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, has ever risen from the dead. Just because your little book says it is so does not make it real.
    You asked if we saw the American revolution or the Big Bang. The answer is ‘no’. However, the American Revolution is a matter of recent historical fact supported by countless eye-witness accounts, official reports, and a plethora of artifacts capable of being studied and verified. The Big Bang , conversely, is a theory. A THEORY. Even cosmologists will admit that the theory may eventually be proven untrue. The key word here is ‘proven’. If sufficient evidence comes to light showing that the Big Bang could not have happened, then the theory will, as so many other theories in the past, be abandoned. Time and time again, your bible has been shown to contain so many inconsistencies that it can not be taken seriously.
    In conclusion, don’t tell me Jesus died for my sins; he died because he was a threat to the contemporary power base. Don’t tell me god loves me; your god does not exist. Don’t quote passages from your book; it was written over the course of a 1,000 years by a bunch of bi-polar lunatics who heard disembodied voices.
    Join us in His noodly goodness. Accept the FSM into your heart. Ramen.

  4. Hakseng says:

    Posted by: humanity | August 29, 2006
    “I can’t believe someone used the Council of Nicea as any evidence at all! The Davinci Code is not a history text-book!”

    I knew about the Council of Nicea (where the Nicene Creed comes from) before the DaVinci Code (a book and movie that I have yet to read or see…) ever came out!
    This information was known before any book or movie, but sometimes it takes a book or a movie to bring the information to the publics’ attention.

    As for the following…
    “The Bible is literally true (6 day creation and all.. I mean all)”

    DaVinci Code is not a history text book… but the Bible is…???

    Before you put all of your eggs in one basket, understand that the Holy Bible is a translation of a translation of a translation of oral stories! I personally believe that any sort of faith must be established by knowing and understanding as much of our world as we can, and then STILL choosing to believe in something. I have a friend that was born and rasied completely Christian. Without knowing any other religion, how can she be sure that she is a real believer in God?!
    Maybe she would make a better Taoist or perhaps Muslim? Who knows such things when people keep themselves convinced that a single book, written by man is the ABSOLUTE truth?!

    I admire what is being done with this Flying Spaghetti Monster website. (I just learned about it this morning…) This is a good critique on Theological logic and reason. But most importantly, I believe it promotes focus on very important issues that people tend to forget or ignore. People forget that there is a huge world, with literally thousands of religions and variations. And here people talk about God as if they have seen and understand all of them! There are gods, Jesus, Yaweh, Allah, Vishnu, Shiva, Agni, Athena, Zeus, Odin, Loki, Quezecotl, (and now FSM) etc… and then there are teachers and prophets, Mohommed, Buddha, Confucius, Lao-tzu, Osho etc…

    How can someone who takes the Bible as 100% truth and all else as pure nonsense possibly understand what is going on with only 1% of the picture visible?

    - Hakseng (The Student)

  5. humanity says:

    Hakseng – that was not my quote. Signatures are at the bottom.

    Anyway, Aaron, the bible is chock-ful of BS. You believe it, along with a bunch of other people who were shortchanged on repetitions of the ‘critical thinking’ gene in their DNA. I’m sorry, but even though you really really really really want it to be true, the evidence indicates that it is not.

    I, however, would like to extensively tour and explore workings of a beer volcano and a stripper factory, so FSMism is the winner!

  6. Andy Bursavich says:

    “I know that if you were to die today that you would all go to hell. unless at one point you declared Christ as your lord and savior. I just want to say i guess is that God loves you no matter what”

    I don’t understand how people can believe there is some all-loving god that would send you to Hell if you don’t make some ridiculous declaration. I wouldn’t send someone I love to be tortured for all of eternity. Hell is just a glorified time-out to manipulate people into oppression via fear.

    Ramen.

  7. L says:

    I think the lesson we’ve all learned from this is that if at one time I claim Jesus to be my Savior and Lord…

    I can do whatever the hell I want!!!

    Right?

    Because then I’m “saved.” And let’s face it, once I’m saved, I don’t have to worry about one single thing I do. Why? you may ask… well, because “god is a forgiving god.”

    Wow. The world would truly be a great place if everyone believed that.

    Oh and the same appiles for doing things in the name of god. Like Holy Wars. Totally God-Approved. Because man is never wrong in interpreting the “word of god.” Terorists believe they are doing the work of god. I’m pretty sure any Christian you talk to on the street hates them.

    So get a sense of humor, and quit thinking your way is better than my way.

    (By the way, Christians scare the bejesus out of me.)

  8. Noodly..? says:

    A murderer goes on a rampage and kills 150 kids, because he’s having a bad hair day. The murderer proceeds to get put on trial, facing capitol punishment. Now…he says to the judge ‘Mr. Judge… I know that you’re a kind and good judge, so I know you won’t send me to my death’.

    interesting theory. however, from what i understand (please do correct me if im wrong) If God was the judge, and the murderer confessed all of his sins, he would be forgiven and go to heaven…

    interesting story: Adolf Eichmann was put on trial in Israel, and he was convicted of many crimes, and put to death. afterwards, the priest attending him in his final days was interviewed. he said, sadly, that Eichmann had not accepted God, but if he had, he would have gone to heaven, despite his crimes. when asked about the millions of Jews who were Eichmann’s victims, the priest replied, i imagine they are burning in hell right now.

    just goes to show-why believe in a religion that condemns all peoples who dont believe the same to everlasting torment?

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