Please watch what you say, your blasphemy is pleasing the devil. Do you really want to spend eternity in hell where there will be weeping and knashing of teeth? The devil is using you as his vessel to mock the Truth so that you may discourage people from believing in it in order for that you and others may be eternally damned. God loves you and wants you saved so that you may spend eternity with Him in paradise. All you have to do is repent and accept Jesus as your Lord and Saviour and your sins will be forgiven. Friend, if you let Jesus be Lord of your life it will be purposeful as you fulfil God’s perfect plan for your life. Science is a religion of it’s own. To believe in evolution also requires faith. Again this is a mockery from satan. We did not derive from monkeys, we were made in the image of God and the devil hates that because he hates God so he uses this lie to persuade people that God is the liar and we did not originate from Adam and Eve. I will pray for you Bobby but I hope that you may be saved and experience the joy of knowing the Truth and having a personal relationship with the living God - there is nothing like it, He is so loving, gracious and merciful.
God bless you,
Pamela
I think the whole letter is pretty flakey as far as arguments go but you can’t advertise for Microsoft as your footer and honestly expect anyone to take you seriously.
Beyond that I’m really interested in hearing how you know what the Devil thinks?
Im tired of these religious crazies.
Science is NOT religion, and you have to have faith in it but also you have to quesiton your own hypothesis in science.
Trying to defend faith in science class only makes you look stupid. And you probably are.
I’d like to thank her for being one of the few non-believers who responds here without wishing death and pain upon the FSM faithfull. Wrong or not, at least she’s polite.
For someone who loves us, he seems awfully eager to send us to hell.
BTW: Allen, you do NOT “have to have faith” in science: you are explicitly NOT SUPPOSED to have faith in it. That’s the whole point. Scepticism is good for science, as long as that scepticism is rational. Take nothing on faith: demand evidence.
Arrr.
This is a blasphemous site. Every true believer knows that the real devil’s name is toby.
The Devil’s Name Is Toby
http://beepbeepitsme.blogspot.com/2006/08/devils-name-is-toby_05.html
“Please watch what you say, your blasphemy is pleasing the devil.”
f.y.i. for those chritian ****ers this is not a site to promote your religeon and how ours is “blasphemos”. if we wanted your anti-Pastafarian comments taken seriosly, don’t make it look like we are the bad guys
and like the girl in the “UNITED” music video,”Don’t discriminate, just appreciate.”
Please watch what you say
Please watch what you say, your blasphemy is pleasing the FSM. Do you really want to spend eternity with his Noodly Goodness where there will be feasting and clashing of forks and knives? The FSM is using you as his vessel to spread the Truth so that you may encourage people from believing in it in order for that you and others may be eternally praised. The FSM loves you and wants you saved so that you may spend eternity with Him in paradise. All you have to do is pass the parmesan cheese and accept The FSM as your Lord and Saviour and your dietary indescretions will be forgiven. Friend, if you let The FSM be Lord of your life it will be purposeful as you fulfil His perfect plan for your life. Flying Spaghetti Monsterism is a religion of it’s own. To believe in evolution also requires faith. Again this is a mockery from “Bob”. We did not derive from Yeti, we were made in the image of The FSM and “Bob” hates that because he hates NHGH so he uses this lie to persuade people that The FSM is the liar and we did not originate from Yeti or Pasta. I will pray for you Bobbies but I hope that you may be saved and experience the joy of knowing the Truth and having a personal relationship with the edible God - there is nothing like it, He is so loving, gracious and merciful.
Yours in Pasta and Slack and piratery,
Reverend Egg Plant
“Saviour”? Here in America we spell it “savior”. Are you Canadian? I thought Canadians had more sense.
Goodness. Whatever happened to the Judeo-Christian God’s ominipotence? If he is infinite, beyond human comprehension, wouldn’t his sense of humor be without limit?
I’ll quote Orlando Bloom in “Kingdom of Heaven”:
“God will understand. And if he doesn’t, then he isn’t God, and we need not worry.”
Go Flying Spaghetti Monster, Go!
Midget in Pirate Regalia: Lol yeah I realize that, the hole point of science is indeed questioning it. And in faith you cant question it because it is believed by crazies like this one, that you will go to hell for questioning it.
And telling someone they will go to hell if they dont believe in the Bible or God, but telling them at the same time you have the choice, is contradictive.
Example:
“You can get to into heaven, as long as you believe in God and the Bible” that is holding a gun to my head and telling me that I have the choice to keep my wallet but if I dont give you it, you’ll shoot me in my head, what am I going to do? Im probably going to give you the wallet in fear. Its contradictive and its not fair by a long shot.
Its obvious that none of these people have really studied the bible nor do they understand it.
WOW! Weeping and knashing of teeth! Lyke, ohmigawd!!!1!!11!1
I can’t wait.
This is what I took from your letter:
”
LOL!!! I can read the mind of some1 that doesn’t exist and I have nvr seen, rofl. Let me translate for you: the d3v1l is gonna make you all burn in a river of fire! For all eternity, lol! Believe in someone that was born 2000 years ago, pwnage! Repent! My religion TOTALLY makes sense!
PWNAGE!!!!
”
Your words and threats mean nothing to someone WHO DOESN’T BELIEVE IN THEM.
Although I have many reservations about God and the Devil (and most religions for that matter) at least Pastafarian is the tastiest of the pleasure faiths. I have a forkful of linguine and I think, “Bless Him.” Isn’t that so cheerful?
To the kind woman of the Lord Jesus Christ… May you be unblinded by the light, and we hope and pray that you won’t go hungry in the kingdom of deliciousness. Here grab a forkful of linguine dear.
Bless Him!
I’m really worried about the knashing. That sounds terrible.
not…. KNASHING OF TEETH!! oh good lord of spaghetti, save me from the mandibles!!
the color of whine for the christian god is red.
the color of wine with my god is also red…FSM think and you will be saved. I cant believe i’m doing this… I must be possessed
Thank you Pamela for educating me in the error of my ways and helping me to a greater understanding. Now, can I educate you in how to spell GNASHING, thats GNASHING NOT KNASHING you silly bigoted, blind foolish child.
heres a guide for christians on how to right a hate mail letter to venganza:
OPENING MESSAGE: typically somthing about blasphemy.
THREATS: sometimes the more aggresive type will just threaten, as seen in the “your god is a homo” letter.
HELL: this part is a MUST: the part about burning in hell.
GLORIFY: always, always, glorify christianity at the end!!
and just to make sure its a good hate mail, follow these steps:
MIND: this is an absolute must: always have single-minded views!!
HATE: this is a very good tip: try to badmouth evolution as much as possible.
CHANCE: say that if they come clean now, the will follow the good path.
and theres your hate mail!!
(for all the dumbasses out there this is sarcasm)
heres a guide for christians on how to right a hate mail letter to venganza:
OPENING MESSAGE: typically somthing about blasphemy.
THREATS: sometimes the more aggresive type will just threaten, as seen in the “your god is a homo” letter.
HELL: this part is a MUST: the part about burning in hell.
GLORIFY: always, always, glorify christianity at the end!!
and just to make sure its a good hate mail, follow these steps:
MIND: this is an absolute must: always have single-minded views!!
HATE: this is a very good tip: try to badmouth evolution as much as possible.
CHANCE: say that if they come clean now, the will follow the good path.
and theres your hate mail!!
(for all the dumbasses out there this is sarcasm)
shit i posted twice again
owell
“I will pray for you Bobby but I hope that you may be saved and experience the joy of knowing the Truth and having a personal relationship with the living God - there is nothing like it, He is so loving, gracious and merciful.”
You seem to have forgotten how your spew began:
“Do you really want to spend eternity in hell where there will be weeping and knashing of teeth? ”
Your God is psychotic…no thanks.
No one else pointed this out so I thought I would.
“To believe in evolution also requires faith. Again this is a mockery from satan. We did not derive from monkeys, we were made in the image of God”
1. No one ‘believes’ in evolution. You ‘understand’ it or you don’t. By the way you do not understand it or are a ‘nonbeliever’ if thats easier for you.
2. Satan also lied to us about the world being round and the earth being the center of the solar system. That satanic mockery sure was proven false, thanks to the persistance of the faithful. Keep your eyes and mind closed and all will be well little christian.
3. No kidding we didn’t come from monkeys. Where did you get that? Clearly you do not even understand what you hate. Evolution states man and monkey have a common ancester.
4. Do you think that humans and monkeys are oddly similiar in appearence? I sure do. Did god also make monkeys in his image because he loves monkeys?(and therefor the devil also hates monkeys) Or when it came time to make monkeys he was at the end of his creative limit, having just made the platypuss, and just said, “F#@k it, I will make really hairy humans.”
Thats about all the sarcasm and condescending attitude I have for now. Arrrrrrr they are so annoying!
Why are these fundi Christians so weird? I mean, there are plenty of sensible religions in the world that have the good sense to: (a) stay out of the job of emperical science by way of not thinking that their religious doctrines have any relevence to the plausibility of scientific theories; (b)hold far more reasonable views about God (i.e., that if God created monkeys and humans that She would equally care about both — on the hyopothesis that God loves humans because we are created in His image, it would follow that parents shouldn’t care so much about children who don’t look like them, which sounds like bad parenting to me); (c) hold far more just views about God — a God that punishes people for believing only what the evidence will substantiate seems to be very cruel indeed. And finally, how do these people manage to be so supremely unreflective? Why does it escape them that their certainty has nothing essential to do with the strength of the doctrines they believe but with human frailties shared by fundies the world over? Strange people indeed.
I have always had one major problem with Christianity and the whole “creation” bit…
If Adam and Eve were the only humans that God created, and all humans came from them, then doesn’t that mean that there was a lot of incest for the first hundred years or so? There would’ve been a lot of stupid people cruising around, if that’s the case…
Just a thought, though….
“God loves you and wants you saved so that you may spend eternity with Him in paradise”
The Spaghetti Monster loves us as well. You speak of an all-powerful god who wants us to join him in heaven, yet doesn’t have the power to make it so? One of the main differences between the Flying Spaghetti Monster and your false-god is that FSM has the power to do whatever he wants. Not only is he omnipotent, he is also omniscient. FSM knows everything before it happens, including our actions, so he cannot judge us for them. FSM never created an angel, like satan, who would try to overthrow him; that would be stupid. FSM does not lack foresight or intentionally create problems for himself. When FSM uses his noodly appendages to, for example, make objects seem older then they actually are, he is not doing this to test whether or not you should be cast into a lake of fire for all of eternity; that would be immoral. FSM uses his noodly appendages to mess with your mind and to amuse himself and his legions of pirates in heaven. There are many other distinctions between the Flying Spaghetti Monster and your false-god. Please discard your collection of false prophecies and borrowed mythologies. Your bible is not worth the paper it is printed on.
See the light and smell the sauce
Flying Spaghetti Monster be Praised
Dear Bobby- Um, you are a psychopath, not a “Christian”.
The bible has some merit and there are terrific stories in it, but lakes of fire? Red men with forked tongues? Blood rivers? Bleeding moons? 7-headed serpents? snakes that talk? Come the fuck ON, people! Use the brain that GOD gave you. There are no such things as talking snakes and lakes of fire. Duhhhh…..The bible was written in a day and time when there was no SCIENCE, so all those people were fucking idiots anyway. And Please tell me: where are the unicorns in this world of little red men with pitchforks and Gods who are jealous and punitive yet still all-loving? Where are the fairies and the mermaids? I agree that Jesus was a HELL of a lot more enlightened than we will ever be but so was Bhudda and Mohammed. Look at all the holy wars going on in the world….religion is the root of all evil, and religious people are ones who refuse to take responsibility for their own lives. The devil didn’t fucking make you do it. You chose to do it, you fucking freak.
This guy MUST be a screenwriter for B-movies… the silly horror ones. What an imagination!
I like the reference to ‘the living God’, as if there was a deity cage match. Two gods enter, one god leaves!
You know, there is something I don’t get. It seems like the majority of the christians that post the hate-mail here have shockingly poor grammar. And their arguments really have no point or reasoning (other than the rest of us are going to hell because that is what Father McFeely told them as small children).
Would this be because, really, the people posting said hate-mails are actually from an uneducated underclass? That’s the only way I can see why they would push for ID to be taught in schools anyway.
So I say the rest of us not be bothered by these poor ignorant wretches. Let them rant and rave all they want and in so Darwin-ing themselves out of the economic and educational food chain. And leave the running of the world to the rest of us rational people. Besides, someone needs to harvest the wheat for all the pasta we eat, anyway.
Arrrrrrr
Knashing of teeth? I mean, the lakes of fire were enough, but knashing of teeth?
Wow, that’s deep!! Maybye i’ll try to die in a dentists arms, that way it won’t be so bad!!.
You know, I feel sorry for all these people who had christian propaganda forced on them when they were young. I too was a victim of this chritian brain washing, but then I found out that they had
1) almost no evidence that what they said was 100% true, as they said
2) the bible was written over 1000 years ago, and whoever wrote had most likley never seen this “god” of theres.
So for all those christian kids out there, don’t just accept what all these idiots say (my fav hate mail quote has to be this: The bible is 100% true, it says so in the bible)
In fact this is a great example of typical christian circular logic.
May the FSM bless the backwords christians
One thing I don’t get here…..if god is so kind and loving….then how come he sends those who dare question him to an eternity of hell? (and knashing. Can’t forget that.)
And I love how these people KNOW FOR SURE what’s going to happen when they die. I mean, that’s a neat trick, considering none of them have actually died yet.
Not to mention in order to accept all this, you pretty much have to ignore everything scientific. Which comes off as a tad stupid to me.
If I remember, to Blaspheme you must take the Lord’s name in vain. And as far as I can see, FSM have been doing nothing of the sort. Use a dictionary before you start throwing long words around.
Don’t force your religion down our throats if we’re being blasphemous thats our problem. Are you sure that it’s not you that being blasphemous? Hmmm a thing to ponder upon but I wont worry too much about it, you can always convert if you like. But I won’t force you to because thats the difference between you and me.
Much Love From,
A. Monkey
Is it not you who is “taking the Lord’s name in vain” by claiming that you know everything he does, thus making him as weak as you? Either that or you are claiming you are God. Both essentially are covered by Blastphemy.
… And how does a “lake of fire” actually work? I mean fire is not a liquid. It does not form lakes. Ah, you eve-angelicals are so foolish when it comes to these things. Besides it holds no threat, you are already dead, and without your nerves you wouldnt be able to feel it anyway.
Most of us do have a personal relationship with the living God, we just don’t like arrogant third parties who think they can dictate to us what that relationship is, or what the nature of God is. Remember that of the seven deadly sins, pride is the worst.
Ah, so true, Frey. Pride is the worst. Also, and this might please a lot of the Pastafarians, apparently “Lust is the least of all sins.” However the man who wrote that statement was in a brothel at the time…
My teath Knashed once. I went to a dentist right away, got the problem sorted out.
Seriously, knashing teath is no fun.
Let’s get it straight:
Christianity = faith.
Evolution = Science.
Science = Plausible, testible, repeatable theory that can be proven.
In algebraic terms:
E=S-F (where E is evolution, S is science, and F is faith)
While:
C=F-I+St (where C is christianity, F is faith, I is intelligence, and St is stupidity.)
Then if, as the christians always insist, faith equals itelligence, christianity equals stupidity
Or is it actually you who is mocking the flying spaghetti monster, and it you who should repent so your sins will be forgivin so then you may go and spend eternity in the flying spghetti monster paradise once you pass from this world?
Like I said before:
What? Umm…lets see…according to your logic, Pasta = Satan. If we do some slight calculations, we end up with:
if pasta is the devil, that must mean that all wheat-based foods are at least demonic, which then amounts to the fact that because ceremonial wafers are basicly bread, that Christians then eat demons, and if the wafers sybolize Jesus’ flesh that JESUS was less then a demon, maybe an imp? And if Jesus was God’s son, and his son is an Imp, that amounts to the Christian god being som sort of demonic being, and if he is the surpreme lord of everything, that amounts to……..*gasp* God and Satan being the same person!
When you think about it, if all humans are descended from Adam and Eve, their kids must have engaged in some mad incest. peace.
“your blasphemy is pleasing the devil”
.
If I don’t believe in the God what is the likelehood I believe in the Devil? I too hope the you, Pamela, find the TRUTH!
.
Science is about finding answers through looking at data were as religion is about finding answers by making something up because your either too lazy, too primative or just plainly too stupid to understand.
.
Mankind seems to have a problem admiting that he does not know, so when ever they came across a problem that they could not answer then God was the answer.
.
I am fighting for the day when the dictionary definition of God is :-
.
“A common answer to a problem when the person answering simply does not know”
Of course we didn’t evole from monkeys. We are apes, monkeys have tails, apes have vestigile tails. We are all primates, we evolved from a COMMON ANSESTOR why can people not research what evolution actually means before they try to disprove it by such stupid logic?
hello.
g + nashing = gnashing.
k + nashing = wrong.
that is all.
Oh please. Spend your time preaching somewhere else. We won’t change, not one of us, because we are loyal.
RAmen
Yarr! Tis true. Leave ye non beliver!
wtf
.
just great, another hard core christian bitch who wants to tell us we’re going to hell for accepting evolution. goddammit (did i just say that) do all hard core christians choose to be retarded. evolution isn’t the work of the devil, for Satan, just like god, doesn’t exist.
.
oh, pamela, the way you describe god, he sounds like a sadistic and creepy fuck
Anyone else confused about the whole devil thing?
surely if he’s getting us to mess everyone about, when we do turn up in hell he’d be all
“good sinning, have some free prostitutes” or somesuch
‘Anyone else confused about the whole devil thing?’
.
I’m not, I just hope she’s wearing a blue dress!
Blue is my bestest color!
I can’t believe that anyone would actually believe that load of garbage. Satan, knashing of teeth, Hell and eternity in Heaven with The Lord?
Fear is a powerful tool and it’s clear that many people buy into imaginary things.
FSM is clearly as ridiculous in contrast to Christianity. I would tend to believe more in FSM though… You don’t have all the eternity in hell, with the knashing of my teeth.
Another Person converted to FSM today,
Nathan
No it isn’t, the devil does not exist.
No, but that isn’t going to happen no matter what you psychos say.
If an omnipotent god loves me so much, why does all this bad junk keep happening to me?
If I just have to accept Jesus and what not before I die, why not keep having fun and then accept the stupidity right before I die?
Of course we did not derive from monkeys, we derive differentiable functions. No but seriously, we came from apes, not monkeys, and the apes we evolved from probably don’t exist anymore, but different apes evolved from those.
Ever read the bible? I don’t think so, or you wouldn’t think this “god” character was at all merciful.
Okay, asshole. Perhaps you should think before saying things. Think about what the Bible teaches. It’s a children’s fairy tale! It’s a badly written, boring, dangerous, untrue pile of made up shit that a commitee of morons pulled out of their asses at the Council of Nicaea. It was not written by God. It has no value whatsoever. So think about that the next time you reference the fucking Bible, asshole.
To believe in evolution requires a brain and some free thought, no faith. To believe in religion requires faith and a lifetime of brainwashing. Get it right.