I find your site degrading and offensive. God does not allow for the type of logical fallicies you promote on your site. For instance, why would a perfect, infanate being have to rest for three days after creation? The bible clearly establishes a maximum one to six day resting ratio for the creation of the universe by an infante being. Ok, I’ll be sympathetic to your tortured logic and explain how mankind knows that the bible is the word of god. 1. the bible is infallible. Scott Taylor
Your offensive site
Published by Bobby Henderson July 30th, 2006 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 49 Comments
49 Responses to “Your offensive site”
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We come not into your churches preaching our doctrine unto you, but, yet, you come forth criticizing that which you do not understand. Back, you hypocrites! And may the Flying Spaghetti Monster have mercy on your soul.
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MERCY! No no! I vote for fire and brimstone!
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Resting 1 day? OK!
Resting 3 days? Utter madness!
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Scott-
Next time you decide to write a threatening post, use spell check.
F-a-l-l-a-c-y
I-n-f-i-n-i-t-e
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Scott, I’m curious if you are reading the original Hebrew/Aramaic version of the Bible or one of the 2100+ translations in existence worldwide? Since each translation of the Bible varies and overlaps, it is very likely that “your” Bible contains innaccuracies, and is thus not infallible. So you are wrong. Good day.
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Dear morons,
This letter is obviously fake. It was a joke.
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Does anyone ever wonder why, if God is so infinite (I’m sorry; infanate) he would need to rest?
God: Man… those mountain ranges really took a lot out of me. I’d better take a breather before I make life miserable for everyone on earth.
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I think perhaps the poster was trying to convey that, due to his pure and unspoiled nature, God is eternally baby-like.
. . .
or maybe he just can’t spell big words.
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Wow, that’s some nice circular reasoning you have there. The bible is infallible so you believe in it. Why is it infallible? Because you believe it is.
Wow, that’s enough logic to make me become a christian.
Oh wait, no it’s not.
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It’s sad that only one of you so far has realised that this is a joke :(
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If god was so perfect, why do men have nipples.
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yeah that is the great thing about sarcasm…if you smack someone in the face with it they laugh and join in and buy the tshirt, but if you flick their ear with it they piss and moan. love it.
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Circular Logic Alert!!
I LOL’d at this one. Seriously.
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Not a very funny joke, though, is it? Adds to the confusion.
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Isn’t it sad how people believe in something that isn’t there? And how miracles only happen if they are a favorable event? How unfavorable events are punishment?
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Uh, JOKE! And it was a good one.
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Why would a perfect infanate (sic) being create lice to inflict the world?
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I have just one comment. The orginal poster needs to learn a lot more. The more you know, the less you say.
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You people who keep crying that this is a joke, how do you know that? I honestly have no problem believing that some extremely stupid and irate christian out there decided to write this piece of hatemail.
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Dude. “God does not allow for the type of logical fallicies you promote on your site” is a logical fallacy.
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@Kevin Ballard:
This line is how we know it’s a joke. No offended fundy is going to bring up the resting ratio required for creation.
“The bible clearly establishes a maximum one to six day resting ratio for the creation of the universe by an infante being.”
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“The last superstition of the human mind is the superstition that religion in itself is a good thing, though it might be free from dogma. I believe, however, that the religious feeling, as feeling, is wrong, and the civilized man will have nothing to do with it. . . . [When the] shadow of religion disappeared forever . . . I felt that I was free from a disease.”
– Samuel Porter Putnam, My Religious Experience, 1891
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Are these letters written by children?
Ever since I was old enough to stop believing in Santa I had my doubts about the bible. It all seemed so hocus pocus like. What proof is there that any of the bullshit happened in the bible?
How big was the arc? How big was the dry dock? Was there an inventory list of all the animals?
Why are there so many christian religions? Which is the right one?
The Spaghetti Monster is cool looking. Sounds like he has done some cool Jesus like stuff. Might as well believe in that.
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“If god was so perfect, why do men have nipples.”
Purple Nurples.
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“The bible clearly establishes a maximum one to six day resting ratio….”
pure comic genius.
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God gave men nipples so other men might play with them.
Intelligent design, that.
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oh yes the bible is infalable except for all the contradictions. But I guess those are SUPPOSED to be over looked. So sorry for bringing them up.
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I really hope that the person who wrote this IS a christian, because he just pointed out how stupid most of you are for not realizing it was a joke…
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The flying spaghetti monster will throw all non-believers like this Scott Taylor moron into a boiling vat of Diavolo Sauce (Note for heretics: that’s spicy red pepper sauce).
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I think that it’s the 10-hour workday schedule. We still get our 40 hrs in!
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Wouldn’t an infinite being be able to forego rest altogether?
The answer, of course, is yes. But He chose, in all his wisdom, not to. On the four days the divine Pasta created the world. On days five through seven, He rested.
It’s in the good book: It’s infallible.
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infanate… the freudian desire to eat babies?
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This guy’s logic makes complete sense. If the Bible says it, it’s true. Just like if my Harry Potter book says that Hogwarts exists, then that must mean Hogwarts is real.
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All atheists eat babies. The bible is right because Jesus loves you all. Bush prays for us!
Honestly, if Jesus came back to earth today I’m convinced he’d be killed by Christian fundis.
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“if you flick their ear with it they piss and moan”
…but enough about your dodgy fetish-porn collection ;)
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Oh, come on. Leave out the obvious trolls, will you?
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Well, one can only hope that this is in fact a joke:
“Ok, I’ll be sympathetic to your tortured logic and explain how mankind knows that the bible is the word of god. 1. the bible is infallible.”
Because that’s the kind of logic that a 3-year-old uses to avoid potty training on the big, scary toilet.
Of course, having been in the real world for a while now, I can confirm actual meetings with people who practice this kind of logic, so the idea of someone writing something so assinine isn’t all that farfetched.
Ah well. Some would say ’tis better to be right than to be bright.
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Ok ok ok … I have to admit, I did not scroll through all the coments before choosing to reply to this email. If I hit on something you already have, I am sorry, but when I read the first bit.. I had not choice but to go off on a tangent.. I am prone to that sometimes. Forgive me.
“Your offensive site
I find your site degrading and offensive.”
I find your religion degrading and offensive. Shall we take a walk through some of the passages in your “holy book” to back that up?
How about a verse from Genesis to start?
Gen. 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and … offer him there for a burnt offering.
Ahh gotta love that ritual human sacrifice to appease the god, huh?
How about this one from Numbers?
Numbers 31:17-18
Now kill all the boys. And kill every woman who has slept with a man, but save for yourselves every girl who has never slept with a man.
Ahh a little rape to make the day go faster.
Shall I go on with the murders and other attrocities? How offensive your book is.
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“God does not allow for the type of logical fallicies you promote on your site.”
Of course not.. because you xstains have the market on illogical fallacy.
An invisible man, living in the sky, list of rules that he will punish you HARSHLY for braking.. but he loves you? PUHLEASE.. Get real. Learn what a logical fallacy is, hell, learn what LOGIC is before you start throwing words you know nothing about around.
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“For instance, why would a perfect, infanate being have to rest for three days after creation?”
First.. let me just say, you need a dictionary, or a spell checker. There are hundreds of free ones online. Please, try to avail yourself of them.
Second.. Why would a “perfect” and “infinite” (notice I spelled that right?) have to take “7 days” to create anything? Could it not just snap its fingers?
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“The bible clearly establishes a maximum one to six day resting ratio for the creation of the universe by an infante being.”
Again, please learn to spell. And who REALLY cares what a book of fairy-tales, laden with lies, contradictions, inconsistencies and attrocities has to say about a “resting ratio”?? Come on.
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“Ok, I’ll be sympathetic to your tortured logic and explain how mankind knows that the bible is the word of god. 1. the bible is infallible.”
“Infallible”???? REALLY? You have GOT to be joking. It is so full of BS that it drips brown ooze.
The lies.. the first one being told by your god itself, the inconsistencies, the first one also being found in the first book, the contradictions, the attrocities.. “infallible”?? BULL PUCKIES, I say to you… BULL PUCKIES.
The Heathen
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BlackSpamHole you said “If god was so perfect, why do men have nipples.” , that’s not the right question the right question is: Why do they not produce beer?
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did you say the bible was inflatable?
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I love how this person uses the bible to back up an argument against the bible. That’s like me saying “The bible is false.” and him saying “No, the bible says it’s true, so it is!” I love reading these posts. They make me feel so much better about my inteligence. Sometimes I doubt that I’m smarter than most people (because everyone thinks their smart, right), then I come here and my fears are put to rest.
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I love this site. Laughed ’til I cried and nearly pissed myself. Can’t believe how serious some self-righteous fools are getting about it. I am a bit concerned about you though, Bobby, as you obviously have too much time on your hands. All power to the Flying Spaghetti Monster!
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The Heathen spelled “atrocities,” as “attrocities,” but that was probably just a typo. I love it when people who are bagging-on other people’s spelling misspell themselves… or other words, like atrocites.
All in all, the original post must be a joke; “The bible clearly establishes a maximum one to six day resting ratio for the creation of the universe by an infante being.” is WAY TOO STUPID, but I reserve my right to be wrong about that…
Yes, the bible is inflatable, Rob, when it’s printed on used condoms, like my copy here.
(They were used, for hair-ties…)
~RAmen.
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scott is a dumbass
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I find your existence degrading and offensive. If god doesn’t allow for the logical fallacies in this site, but said fallacies exist, then shouldn’t it follow that your god doesn’t exist?
“Did you mean: infinite” – Google, on your spelling
The bible is a valid source for christian religion, not logic. Also, the FSM taking a three day break isn’t illogical, it’s just lazy or the result of a very massive hangover.
Ok, I’ll be sympathetic and explain why the bible isn’t logical 1: it isn’t internally consistent (take a quiz from landoverbaptist.org and look up the given passages. You might be amazed)
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Have you heard of “never back down”? It’s a disabilist film, this man said to me at the cinema, he said : “There’s an intelligence test on in the othe room”, I said “oh, well never back down”. I meant the syndrome, but shock horror, he bought me a ticket and I had to watch “Never Back Down”, the movie, in the cinema. Well I almost shit myself.
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Sorry I have to go now, the warden’s coming…he said it was the pebbles on his ride over here.
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Did you know martial arts were invented by pacifists getting bothered? They thought “Fuck this”, I’m sick off it, it hurts, and they called it “The Peacemaker”, and what’s more, my mother still takes the piss out whatever I do, even when I smash her face in.
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That last one wasn’t funny, it HAS to be withdrawn!
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