what the hell is this?

PASTAFARIAN?!? that doesn’t even make sense!! why the hell would god be PASTA?!? It sounds like you were bored and asked “why don’t pirates exist anymore? and why doesn’t heaven have a stripper factory and a beer volcano?” Well buddy, just because you google searched some stupid fact and made a website, doesn’t mean you made a religion.
And that FSM bible is a load of crap. -John Ordoyne

53 Responses to “what the hell is this?”

Pages: [1] 2 » Show All

  1. 1 - Cameron Hayde - Jul 30th, 2006

    Poor John. It sounds like someone either a) didn’t actually read the website or b) is just jealous that we have found the truth…(or both).

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  2. 2 - Michael Thompson - Jul 31st, 2006

    i really hate it when a joke goes right over someone’s head. i thnk i will take a shot at his questions
    1) why the hell would god be PASTA? becasue pasta is yummy and coming in different shapes, sizes and flavours.
    2)It sounds like you were bored and asked “why don’t pirates exist anymore? i ask myself that question everyday. but i dont think even the great tome of FSM tells use why they are all gone so i dont really know where that statment is coming from
    3)and why doesn’t heaven have a stripper factory and a beer volcano? why not its heaven. i would love a beer volcano

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  3. 3 - MaleficentZ - Jul 31st, 2006

    How dare he mock our religion! This was divine inspiration like pasta in a vodka cream sauce is divine.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  4. 4 - imneuromancer - Jul 31st, 2006

    Wow, John is a SWIFT one, isn’t he?

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  5. 5 - Mooph - Jul 31st, 2006

    Actually, he has a bit of a point. I mean, why DOESN’T heaven have a stripper factory and beer volcano?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  6. 6 - Chad - Jul 31st, 2006

    Oh, it does, it does. Right next to the milkshake pool on the lesbian cloud.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  7. 7 - Icthys - Jul 31st, 2006

    You can tell who the idiots are. They’re the ones who sign their comments in the text field, despite entering their name in the name box. -Icthys

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  8. 8 - Captain Bob - Jul 31st, 2006

    Especially since pirates DO still exist. Ask any freighter captain near Somalia or the China Seas.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  9. 9 - God - Jul 31st, 2006

    This is God. In fact, there is a stripper factory and beer volcano up here. Prove me wrong.

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  10. 10 - Steve - Jul 31st, 2006

    “why doesn’t heaven have a stripper factory and a beer volcano?”

    … sounds like a tee shirt in the making.

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  11. 11 - insanity - Jul 31st, 2006

    There still are pirates out there. They don’t have huge boats with a skull and crossbones on there flags. They have motor boats and machine guns now, but they absolutely still exist. Maybe they aren’t looking for the gold burried in Davy Jones’ locker, and I’m not sure if they still yell “Argh” for no reason but next time I come across one I will let you know.

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  12. 12 - Vincent Murdoch - Jul 31st, 2006

    Why do they Mock our religion with comparing it to their religion which is the mockary?

    -Vincent Murdoch
    -Member of the Primaverians, A refomist sect of the Church of Alfredo.

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  13. 13 - Mazrat - Jul 31st, 2006

    It’s no good him complaining that a fact is ’stupid’. And that’s a fact!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  14. 14 - miharu - Jul 31st, 2006

    Beer volcano? Sounds like Dianetics to me.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  15. 15 - Steveofhouston - Jul 31st, 2006

    Mooph:

    Scrubs reference…nice.

    Oh and, yeah, John’s an idiot.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  16. 16 - User - Jul 31st, 2006

    “It is natural that people should differ most, and most violently, about the unknowable. . . . There is all the room in the world for divergence of opinion about something that, so far as we can realistically perceive, does not exist.”

    – E. Haldeman-Julius, “The Unknowable,” The Militant Atheist

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  17. 17 - jazz - Jul 31st, 2006

    because a beer volcano would produce HOT BEER, dumbass.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  18. 18 - llDayo - Aug 1st, 2006

    “And that FSM bible is a load of crap.”

    Takes one to know one!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  19. 19 - Reverend Not - Aug 1st, 2006

    ARR!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  20. 20 - God - Aug 1st, 2006

    Jazz guessed it! That’s why I have a beer glacier up here. Ice cold beer, and the volcano spews chili, no beans the way I intended chili to be made. If you like the beans, then serve the chili over the beans.

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  21. 21 - Transcendant Spaghetti - Aug 1st, 2006

    “why doesn’t heaven have a stripper factory and a beer volcano?”

    Because some of us prefer our women real and not as robots!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  22. 22 - Dave - Aug 1st, 2006

    Man…A beer Volcano would rule. But why a stripper factory? Why not just a strip club for the gods?

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  23. 23 - Mike G - Aug 1st, 2006

    Hey, stupid, I’ll make this simple for you.

    1: At no point is this a valid religion. It is a deliberate satire to help show the world that ALL religions are flawed.

    If you’re willing to believe any ridiculous fairy tale handed to you by a perverted thief in a funny outfit (I’m looking at you, christians), why not buy into one that promises booze and sex instead of celibacy and slavery? It’s a joke with a grain of truth at its core. If you can’t see past the wrapping, don’t try.

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  24. 24 - Spencer - Aug 2nd, 2006

    Oh, it does, it does. Right next to the milkshake pool on the lesbian cloud.
    -Chad

    That’s it, I’m reconverting. Pastafarianism was nice, but I lost interest in it and defaulted back to atheism. But a lesbian cloud? I’m back.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  25. 25 - Midget in Pirate Regalia - Aug 4th, 2006

    “just because you google searched some stupid fact”

    Hey, at least you can find STUPID facts on Google. More than you can say of the bible.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  26. 26 - karl the konvert - Aug 4th, 2006

    evidently he hasn’t read HIS bible lately, it seems to be hold alot more crap than ours possibly could

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  27. 27 - Sean - Aug 4th, 2006

    I read today that Bud are currently engaged in a bidding war with Fosters over who gets exclusive rights to operate the beer volcano.

    As for the stripper factory? Well, thats St. Peter’s job, surely?

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  28. 28 - *** - Aug 6th, 2006

    “just because you google searched some stupid fact and made a website, doesn’t mean you made a religion”

    Looking at the christianity religion, no research was made, there was no valid facts yet you guys seemed to make up a religion. So please give credit to Bobby, at least he made a effort and I strongly believe that his makes more sense

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  29. 29 - Caine Toreador - Aug 11th, 2006

    Beer Volcanoes ? Stripper Factory ? Sure, why not ? It’s Heaven mate ! Anything goes in there. Hence the name. If you can’t have anything you want in Heaven, then it’s not heaven at all.
    Mine would probably resemble more like Valhalla. Booze, Strippers in chainmail, grilled red meat, and thumping each other’s head all day.

    YARRRRRR…..

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  30. 30 - Sam - Aug 11th, 2006

    “PASTAFARIAN?!? that doesn’t even make sense!!”

    nethier does christianity!

    ..”why doesn’t heaven have a stripper factory and a beer volcano?”

    have you died latley?

    “And that FSM bible is a load of crap”

    and yours isn’t?

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  31. 31 - Lisa - Aug 14th, 2006

    John, you are right. this is a load of CRAP!!!!

    Remember, jesus loves you.

    E-mail me and tell me why you people beilve this: lmr26@ptd.net

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  32. 32 - Flora - Aug 16th, 2006

    You mean heaven DOESN’T have a stripper factory and a beer volcano?! Where am I going to get my beer in the afterlife?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  33. 33 - Jenna - Aug 17th, 2006

    May the Giant Spaghetti Monster strike you down :D I hate you :D Die :D Thank You :D

    -PASTA ROCKS-

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  34. 34 - Sam - Aug 17th, 2006

    Bobby, you are right. christianity is a load of CRAP!!!!

    Remember, FSM loves you.

    E-mail me and tell me why you christian people beilve this: demonlord6@msn.com

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  35. 35 - Peter - Aug 17th, 2006

    Well you see, in heaven there is no beer, which is why we drink it here. For once we are gone from here, then shall all our friends be drinking all our beer.

    But thankfully, FSMism does away with this horrible aspect of death.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  36. 36 - Kaoru - Aug 25th, 2006

    So? Why aren’t we made of pasta? Why isn’t god made of pasta? Can you answer that? Don’t talk about things you don’t understand. What happens in this world is a series of reactions to everything around it. So one day we might just evolve into higher, pasta composed beings.

    Now the last thing you should ask yourself is, why are you such an arrogant fool?

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  37. 37 - Dieter - Aug 27th, 2006

    a)I agree on the fact that we need beer glaciers instead of volcanos, lot’s of them.

    b) What do I have to eat in the afterlife? Just because I don’t really like pasta and I’m not thinking of going there if the food sucks.

    Suggestion: Frie shacks everywhere, good fries, not the mc donnalds.

    Greets,
    A concerned afterlife occupant

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  38. 38 - Jackie - Aug 30th, 2006

    “PASTAFARIAN?!? that doesn’t even make sense!! why the hell would god be PASTA?!?”

    Blasphemer. Pasta is everything that’s good. Especially penne in a creamy pesto sauce. If you are truly looking for god, you need look no further than pasta for your proof. Yum.

    And pirates too. Johnny Depp. I’d hit it.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  39. 39 - Hammer - Aug 31st, 2006

    “why the hell would god be PASTA”

    Because pasta is the vehicle by which redemption (and savory goodness)travel.

    infinite anger and damnation for eating meat on a friday Vs. infinite Meaty, starchy, tomato-y tastiness who gives us strippers and beer for adhering to a looser moral standard? I got spaghetti in front by alot.

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  40. 40 - Nostradomus - Sep 3rd, 2006

    “why the hell would god be PASTA”

    Why the hell would god be some floaty guy with a beard?
    He’s apparently ageless.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  41. 41 - SmackyMackyDirtyDirtyPimpMack - Sep 3rd, 2006

    jthios0jesh0ytj0gj0guj3jtopirfgapjfgzkdfg;lzkdymnlesk56jn7w40uw-yspjoe;lesj56-90wu68-3685-wu5yposj;hyklms;ru;;r;yrtyr99959959588694584373873uidlglsdkitn3u6tet9jepoyjm;ldmflgmd;lfmg;ldmg;ldf;gkdf;lgkd;lkgf;dkl

    And that’s the god’s honest fuckin truth right there, pal! FUCK YOU IF YOU DON’T BELIEVE!!!! Ya Fucker!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  42. 42 - Nostradomus - Sep 3rd, 2006

    What is SmackyMackyDirtyDirtyPimpMack on?
    Meth?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  43. 43 - Andriy - Sep 17th, 2006

    BLASPHEMY!!! YOU SHALL [[NOT]] INSULT HIS NOODLYNESS!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  44. 44 - jesus christ - Nov 25th, 2006

    i would join any religion that had a beer volcano and stripper factory. oh wait, i have
    .
    RAmen

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  45. 45 - El Peatieablo - Sep 1st, 2007

    “Well buddy, just because you google searched some stupid fact and made a website, doesn’t mean you made a religion.”
    Of course it doesn’t! We have a fact.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  46. 46 - Etay - Sep 1st, 2007

    Well, maybe I think that Christian Bible is a load of crap. That’s why I’m a Pastafarian.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  47. 47 - The one that called himself John - Oct 5th, 2007

    hello world. I’m pretty sure this was an email to the site holder, which is just plain rude. you violated my trust!!
    This was a year ago when i was a short little idiot. Now I’m a tall idiot. I was basically just freaking out because I was like “wow, the things they have on the internet these days.” and I still partially agree with that. But yeah, this isn’t really serious at all, and me going nuts is pretty stupid. If you’re angry at something, leave! dur hur hur.
    So yeah. If it’s between myspace and this, I’d rather have pastafarians.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  48. 48 - Commodore Angryy - Oct 5th, 2007

    Are you really that John?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  49. 49 - John - Oct 5th, 2007

    yep. nobody really deserves hate mail. You guys can do without the little idiots that come along here every day.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  50. 50 - Commodore Angryy - Oct 5th, 2007

    that’s where you’re wrong newly converted John. we need hatemail to reaffirm ourselves of our ow superiority. without hatemail, this would be useless and boring, as it wouldn’t prepare us for real life fundies.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American




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