You are the biggest hypocrite I have ever been exposed to; throughout your page you repeatedly assert that evolution is the only “scientific” explanation of the origin of species, yet right on your front page you say that such absurd theories as the “Flying Spaghetti Monster” should also be incorporated into public high school science curriculum. So let me explain this to you nice and slow; the Bible is the answer, it is what is to be differed to at all times; the Bible is 100% true- it says so in the Bible. Now, as far as science goes, who the hell do you think your are to call Intelligent Design “illegitimate science,” technically, evolution is the only scientific theory yes; and technically, midgets are people… So we aren’t to concerned with technicalities are we? Plus, part of education is being exposed to every side of the story, because if we cannot give six billion accounts of each event, then not everyone is being fairly represented and we are reduced to defining science as some kind of “standard” outside of human gut-instinct. And besides, as an acquaintance once said (really) “what good has evolution done the world anyway?”
So there we have it, as I noticed some of you other readers correctly pointed out, if you question things your are a tool of Satan. You don’t need to question, God does all the thinking for us; he actually has a degree in Philosophy. Abortion is wrong, it says so in the bible, I dare you to go look it up- you probably won’t find it, but that’s just because your gay, which is also wrong- it says so in the Bible. Now some of us will be wondering the justification for that moral assertion, but remember the Bible is flawless- it says so in the Bible.
Back to evolution- all of the evidence that exists for it is actually false and placed there by Satan, and so that evidence really isn’t inconsistent with the Bible at all, and that makes it void. But the evidence that is the Bible, and its infinite circle of self-validation is completely inconsistent with evolution. I mean come on, if God didn’t really make Adam and Eve, why would He lie to us? And so since ID has more valid evidence than evolution supporting it, it wins and you lose.
As a Christian, I follow Jesus for his teachings of love and tolerance; it is people like you who make me sick, I hope you die in a lake of fire and get your eyes pecked out by crows, so that you may go to hell and exist for eternity in a lake of fire getting your eyes pecked out by crows.
With love,
Charlie
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Awww, commodore. There are a lot of Pastafarians I’m not visiting, even Aussie ones. Simply cause they are not on my route :) Maybe another time OK?
Cause you are not, not important :)
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RDPW
Yep :).
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BTW did you know anything about this?
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Gay Sex Scene Edited Out of Final Harry Potter Novel
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0707/potter.html
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Commodore Angryy
We may have to see about getting a group of Aussie Pastas together on Gold Coast or Brisvegas for a weekend and a night out. Do they still have Dirty Dicks down there?
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Umm… that’s the cabaret dinner thingy for those of our so…so very genteel Englishmen :p
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You can always tell when I’m on a word avoidance jaunt :)
Ok last one then back to it :(
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http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0902/backtoschool.html
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ps thanks for compliment RDPW…means a lot coming from you :))
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Wench Nikkiee
Dirty Dicks? i assure you, i am quite clean, but thanks for asking.
reckon gold coast, because i don’t appreciate brisvegas leeching off the popularity of another city.
Sept 19 ok?
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Wench Nikkiee
Sep 2nd, 2007 at 1:48 am
RDPW
Yep :).
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BTW did you know anything about this?
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Gay Sex Scene Edited Out of Final Harry Potter Novel
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0707/potter.html
*
*big grin* No, thanks for pointing that out to me :)))) Great book though, even without that particalar scene :P
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OK, just read in my local newspaper they are now eating CAT in Australia, there are people distributing recips on the net.
Thumper, you better not be behind this buddy!
And Ships Cat: are you OK? Please let us know……
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“The Bible is 100% true- it says so in the Bible.”
Where does it say that? Show me. Otherwise, I don’t think you have even read the Bible.
Might I remind you that Locusts don’t have 4 legs? They have 6. It says in the freaking Bible that Locusts have 4 legs! You’re an idiot if you think the whole thing is true!
Go convert someone after you’ve learned enough about your own religion.
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Someone just pointed out to me that you’re kidding.
I loved the circular logic, and the juxtaposition of the love and hate in the last paragraph.
Sorry for my misunderstanding,
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Fair winds,
Etay
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Oh my Flying Spaghetti Monster. A gay Harry Potter sex scene? :O
That is so cool. ^_^
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“I hope you die in a lake of fire and get your eyes pecked out by crows, so that you may go to hell and exist for eternity in a lake of fire getting your eyes pecked out by crows”?
Ouch, that doesn’t sound very christain-like…
I’m still surprised by how feebly people like ‘Charlie’ try to convert us. They tell us that they’re faith is one of tolerance and one of love, yet at the same time they whine to us FSM, sending letters that are little more than a tantrum. Seriously, Charlie, if your letter was trying to get me to convert, or maybe to give any respect to your opinion, you failed.
With love,
Igby M.
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@…
What evidence do you have that god is real or that FSM (or any other religion) isn’t?
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“And seriously, christianity pretty much only teaches people to be accepting and tolerant.” You’re new to the whole “christianity” thing, aren’t you? Ever hear of the crusades, inquisition, or the 30 years war? By the way, where in Pastafarianism doe it say to not be accepting and/or tolerant?
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A couple of you have used the “Locust” argument for why Charlie is incorrect in saying “the bible is 100% true”…
Let me explain how wrong you are: It says “goeth upon all four” (Leviticus 11:20) This is not implying that they have four legs, but saying that they MOVE on four legs. Insects have FOUR legs used for normal walking, with their other two legs being for jumping.
Even if this writer honestly thought they had four legs, (which even I as a Christian believe…) Be realistic! Is it really that difficult for someone to make a simple mistake? (This writer is still much smarter than any FSM followers!) …He couldn’t find a Locust! Big Deal!
Everyone makes mistakes, and you can’t use something like that as evidence for the bible being false! I challenge you to find actual PROOF that bible is incorrect. Why? Because you can’t!
Also, to all you people who think that because a Christian person is writing on here, they are not “secure in their beliefs” blah blah blah… perhaps, they just feel the need to talk some sense into you people, with your absolutely ridiculous beliefs!
-Hayley-
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Christian? Love and Tolerance? Hope you die in a lake of fire? WOW! Did you happen to learn YOUR tolerance from Ponchas Pilot? Please step down from your high horse and understand the point…then read: http://sundaychristians.blogspot.com/
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“I challenge you to find actual PROOF that bible is incorrect.”
And I challenge you to find actual PROOF that the Flying Spaghetti Monster isn’t real.
And just a thought, we should all give like a nickel (since there are so many of us) and us FSM followers should buy a pirateship-shaped blimp in which do fly around in. Also we need a gigantic spotlight in which we can put the flying spaghetti monster in the sky at night like the batman symbol.
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This made me laugh.
xD
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I’m on the brink… no bullshit!!!!! The christian movement is filled with retarded people… I’m not saying this to be funny or offensive, if I have offended someone with a retarded child or spouse or sibling, I beg for your pardon by the FSM. But let’s face the simple fact, if there is a xtian with an I.Q. over 100, then I think that might be the second coming of Christ. These are seriously the most brainwashed, pathetic, sad little people that I have ever seen. The simple fact that you allow yourselves to get “spoonfed” such bullshit!!!! PLEASE!!! INVESTIGATE WHAT THEY TELL YOU AND WHY !!! Do you give them money?? For what in return?? When you go to a store and give them money you receive goods.. what does the church give you in return that you couldn’t get at home???
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“the Bible is the answer, it is what is to be differed to at all times; the Bible is 100% true- it says so in the Bible. ”
BWAAAHAAHAA!! You are truly a scream, Charlie! While being erudite enough to type and spell correctly, you’ve got to be the most wrong-headed poster I’ve encountered here. Thanks for the laughs!
“You don’t need to question, God does all the thinking for us”.
Speak for yourself – oh, yeah – you have.
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The bible was written thousands of years ago.
It has since been translated and revised so many times that it is hard to tell what parts are meant to be pure symbolism, and which parts are meant to be actual events. Criticizing someone for their beliefs is true ignorance.
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HAHAHAHAHAHA!
This is brilliant! It’s worthy of Pastor Deacon Fred!
And what’s funnier is the commenters here thinking this is actually serious. I call Poe’s Law on you – you’ve been had.
The first giveaway is that it’s grammatical, and the only misspellings are ones that are funny. And – “infinite circle of self-validation”? Ingenious. And he even spelled “midget” correctly. That’s a giveaway there too.
A big YARRRR to the Pastafarian who wrote this, and may pesto be upon you.
RAmen
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You are a moron. You probably blame God for making you a moron. Unfortunately this just highlights your own moronity.
This post is 100% true… it says so in this post…. so it must be true.
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sory fore poping this post up bat i jast want to remind you ppl abawt this… also if “christen” is still arwnd he shold see it.
it’s the stupedest thin i ever raed!
“I follow Jesus for his teachings of love and tolerance”
“I hope you die in a lake of fire and get your eyes pecked out by crows, so that you may go to hell and exist for eternity in a lake of fire getting your eyes pecked out by crows.”
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wow….. I don’t even know what to say to this one, i’m laughing my dick off. The train of thought is …wow. This guy a window licking tard.
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I take it he doesn’t know what hypocrisy means or irony Happy2bamoneky and Darkbane are right – I’m bored with these people I mean could we have some one who actually show they have a braincell. Just for the record Intelligent design is pseudo science and as for the Bible being 100% true how did the 23,000 typos in the Bible crop up from? For example the books of Judges, Samuel, Kings, Chronicles, Ezra and Nehemiah contain contradictions, elements of numerology and anachronisms.
The books of Ruth, Esther, Job and Jonah are works of pure fiction.
The book of Daniel is fraudulent fiction masquerading as a prophetic work
and the list goes on still what do expect from a window licking tard.
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“Back to evolution- all of the evidence that exists for it is actually false and placed there by Satan” I would really appreciate if Charlie told us where he found this out. I mean if it has facts like this surely it could help us solve all of the problems that the world’s smartest scientists have been struggling with for years. I wonder if his God personally appeared to him to present this fact, because otherwise I reckon he should go back to his windows.
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Sorry, Charlie – if the the Bible is 100% true, when it says the Great Flood was 40 days and in another place 150 days, is it now 200% true? Also, rabbits don’t chew their cud, you cannot see the whole Earth from a mountaintop, and Exodus didn’t happen.
Yes, a God wouldn’t have reason to lie to you, but men – like the ones who wrote the Bible – would. And stop letting someone else do your thinking for you. For all you know, Satan wrote the Bible so you would be lead astray!
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According to the Ethical Atheist website, there are several Biblical choices for the length of the Great Flood:
40 days, length of flood (v7:17)
47 days, dove discovers land (v8:10-11)
150 days, waters were abated (v8:3)
150 days, ark came to rest on Mt. Ararat (v8:4)
253 days, to see tops of mountains (v8:5)
314 days, waters dried up (v8:13)
370 days, earth dried (v8:14)
Looks like your Heavily Edited and Mistranslated Collection of Ancient Fables is up to 600% true, Charlie!
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“…the Bible is 100% true- it says so in the Bible.” HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!! *phew* oh Charlie, you’ve made my day!
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But wait! There’s more!
“If you question things your are a tool of Satan.”
“[God] actually has a degree in Philosophy.”
“…but remember the Bible is flawless- it says so in the Bible.”
Oh Charlie, you crack me up! But on a serious note, I truely feel bad for you. Your world is a sad one. You think living in an existence where you have no true thoughts, no will to decide, and no ability to question the world around you is a good thing? *sigh*
And as for your “it’s true ’cause The Bible says so” logic, it really makes no sense. That’s like saying Dr. Frankenstein actually reanimated a dead body because the book says so. Or that you must say “He-who-must-not-be-named” instead of Voldemort because the book says so. Perhaps the best example of your backwards logic is if a biology textbook says evolution is how life began, isn’t it? It is, because it says so in the textbook.
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