Your A Fag,
how dare you exploit the ignorance of the confused masses that are struggling to find their religious beliefs. Have you no sense you “scoundrel”. Full of rage I am. How can you sleep at night knowing your blasphemous lips have preached utter debauchery. May you rot in the fiery bowels of the poor misguided follower who bestows his faith in you.
your whole Flying spaghetti monster is as believable as the boogie man or other stupid creatures. this religon seems to be just based on a childs creative mind. This makes me think all younger generations now are full with idiots like you. No to believe that a spaghetti controls my life is crazy and stupid. And I have a strong feeling that your joking and don’t tell me your not cause I read it twice it seems all most too stupid please go read the bible or jump off the nearest cliff cause no one has use for you that’s why your making stupid religons In a world where so much is already so confusing, you would go so far as to make fun of my God? A creator is not a thing, it cannot be materialized. A spiritual, sacred image knowing all and seeing all, said it, and it was. To materialize a god is to make a god of one’s own desire, giving it it;s traits in accordance to what you want it to be. If I were to take this entire FSM thing literally, I would be seeing a satirical violation of the First commandment, as well as a connection between a divine Creator of heaven and Earth and an Italian dish. Even if this FSM is all just a simple joke and a satirical message to all those who believe in intellegent design, to start a church for people to worship a manmade god is damned. The starter of such a church will be the one answering to God for the number of lost souls given to the FSM cause. I realize that an email from a Christian will do nothing to stop you from sending more of Earth’s population to Hell, but i can only hope that some of your followers will read this email (if you post it) and repent from worshipping an idol.
Joshua Menges, Red Lion, PA
“Full of rage I am.”
Hi Yoda! Has being a gnome gotten easier yet?
“read the bible or jump off the nearest cliff cause no one has use for you”
There is an argument on the very same thing here.
“…First commandment…”
Do you even know what that is?
I doubt it.
Another person that needs to get educated in the fine art of grammar and spelling. Nobody understands sataire anymore….
“to start a church for people to worship a manmade god is damned”
Well, it seems you are contradicting yourself, young patawon. Christianity was made, and they created a church about a man made god. God, at that time, was just a theory because there was no explaination for existance at that time. Why you are being a moron and wasting your life writing hate mail, is beyond me. But, let’s just say that you shouldn’t continue things like that in the future. It only makes yourself look bad.
“Your a fag”
Do you even know the definition of fag? I find it quite hard to be a “to tire or weary by labor; exhaust” Sure you can be in this state, but you cannot be one.
“your whole Flying spaghetti monster is as believable as the boogie man or other stupid creatures.”
Or other stupid creatures, such as your god, right?
“To materialize a god is to make a god of one’s own desire, giving it it;s traits in accordance to what you want it to be”
That it is, and that’s what was done here, and that’s what was apparently done 2000 some odd years ago.
Dear Mr. Menges,
I find your views fascinating and wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
There are very few people these days who are willing to spew venom and filth at others in print and I for one applaud you for choosing not to hide your violent and anti-social philosophy for fear of being labeled a freakish zealot.
Oh, and I completely agree. Those new Testament Christians can take their “turn the other cheek” attitude and shove it where the Son don’t shine, hahahaha (that’s a pun, right there, see… I know religion is serious and not to be taken lightly but sometimes I speak in tongues).
Anyway, I’m all for the days of plagues and eternal damnation and bestowing curses on people who think differently from you, too. Give me the Old Testament any day, says I! Down with the namby pambies! Give me the Creator Himself, living large and in charge!
Now, I know people say that Christians should be living from the New Testament because, well… that was the part that was actually about Christ… but seriously, you’ll never scare a heretic into conversion with all that love and compassion and understanding crap. C’mon now, right? Anyway… I am glad to see like souls out and about in society. It gives me hope for my own continued freedom from concerned medical practitioners.
God bless and keep you, sir.
Hopefully with karmic balance in consideration.
why do you christians hate us? why don’t you hate buhdists? WHY US?!
Mr Menges wrote: “i can only hope that some of your followers will read this email (if you post it) and repent from worshipping an idol.”
I’m so glad this was posted. Such compassion, eloquence and rationality is bound to turn heads. It’s also very, very funny.
You put ’scoundrel’ in inverted commas but you’re happy to just slap ‘fag’ on the table as it is?
You know, it’s definitely much easier to interpret all hate-mail that comes into this site as deliberate parody than to take it at face value. Because, were there (somehow) to turn out to actually be a god (other than His Divine Noodliness), it’d be kind of sad if his loudest devotees happened to be such a collection of dysfunctional buttocks. Wasn’t it Sartre who said ‘Hell is other people’? Imagine heaven with these guys. Bring on the stripper factory…
Satirical violation… sounds like another good name for a band.
I don’t understand. ‘Your A Fag’? Could he mean ‘Your Fag’? But I don’t even smoke.
I didn’t know I had a fag.
fag…
abbreviation of faggot
faggot- 1) noun. bundle of sticks and wood used for fuel
2)noun. ball of chopped liver, herbs and bread
maybe he’s calling you a bundle of wood…
or some sort of rudimentary dish that evolved in a land without pastary goodness
What am I? Chopped Liver?
eeewwww! That boy needs some pasta!
It’s not just ‘Your fag’, though. It’s ‘Your A Fag’. God (or, I contend, the Flying Spaghetti Monster) knows what the buggery that means.
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I wonder if it is indeed a reference to FSM himself (rather than buggery itself). For He manifestly exhibits two balls of chopped (and mashed) meat (if not liver) with (or without) herbs, bread and seasonings.
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It’s still a factual error, of course, because anyone with half an eye could see (I refer you to Dawkins’ arguments on the value of ‘half an eye’, by the way) that the Noodliscient FSM has two meatballs, faggots, or fags. Perhaps Menges’ half reference is a reflection of his half-arsed grasp of our religion?
Oh, don’t make fun of Mr. Menges for his erratic grammar, pathetic punctuation and rambling run-on sentences. Phrases like “childs creative mind” and “full with idiots” suggest that English may not be his first language. Either that or he was dictating to an angry dyslexic pastor.
“May you rot in the fiery bowels of the poor misguided follower who bestows his faith in you.”
Sorry about the fiery bowels, y’all… it’s IBS.
Mr Mengus
You obviously feel here you are an intelligent man and to a certain extent you very well may be, however if you have not red my reply to “If I Believe You Will Burn In Hell” i shall make a similar point.
How are you to know that your God and your religion isnt just as man made as you claim this one is?
You have the bible which is ment to be the word of God, however is it just me or has God not spoken to anyone on earth in over 2,000 years? I was taught by a christian minister in training that Gods voice is so powerful and so strong that human life could not take it and it would result in our heads exploding, if this is the case how did all these biblical figures from the past manage to talk with God and survive long enough to note it all down?
How can you criticise Bobby and the rest of us here for creating a god in the way we want him to be?
I believe that when things go wrong all religious people in the world believe God will be on your side. Terrorists attack and God will be on YOUR side, If we dont believe in Your God we will all burn in hell, If we are Homosexuals we will all burn in hell etc.
If God is the all loving all seeing all forgiving “father” who dearly loves his “children” the surely he will forgive us all for what we have done in life.
And if God’s creations are his children and he loves all of his children that must mean he loves everyone on earth including rapists, murderers, homosexuals, terrorists etc so
A) whats makes any of the above wrong and
B) what makes you think he will be on YOUR side?
In the bible God isnt quite the wonderful loving forgiving kind father figure religion makes him out to be.
God in the beginging struck fear into the heart of man and as time has gone on, the “loyal servant” of God in the west has fasioned the “creator” of the world into something they want him to be, something just like them.
You want a powerful all knowing all loving all forgiving god that opens his arms and the gates of heaven to those that believe to comfort you when you need it e.g. when we lose a loved one, you want a forgiving god that loves all of his creations so that you can make yourself feel better when you do something wrong, it makes you feel like if you appologise and god will forgive you and all will be well again, but then you want a mean god who will punish those who attack you or challenge you.
Is that not even worse than following the FSM? we arnt the ones mocking god his followers are by giving him boundaries, and manipulating and molding his name, his spirit, his being into something un godly, into something more human than spirit, into something like yourselves.
One other thing, atleast we know what our god looks like, I mean you depict him as a hippy more or less, the hippies didn’t come around until the 1960’s not the 0’s. So you obviously are incorrect in your depictions, also due to the fact that there’s about a 99.8% chance that he could not be white. All of us know we worship a Flying Spaghetti Monster, and we’re proud of it. ^_^
I’m not a FAG (but I’ve slept with a few),
That is about as intelligent as saying ur fukn stupid cos ur an American (or Canadian/Australian/Irish/Kiwi etc) No offence to anyone - I mean we are all fully tapped in the headn Earthlings!!!!!
U dikhead!!! Wot sort of intelligent fukn comment iz that??????
I am open to everything as long as it shows some sort of intelligence!!!
Hey, now why pick on the boogey man - I mean wot haz he done to you????
I think if u want some serious input on this website - for fuck sake say something remotely relevant & at least half arsed!!!
I feel kinda insulted that I am replyn 2 some FUCKEN IGNORANT BIASED UNEDUCATED FUCKER!!!! But I kinda drunk in Munich & a bit bored!!!
The only thing that I believe in is compulsary sterilization 4 fukn stupid people!!
PS: Joshua I love you lotz & wanna hav ur babies (just gota get my manly bits changed first).
All my love
RAT.
“how dare you exploit the ignorance of the confused masses…”
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Legally I think this guy has us, according to all the law books I am reading Christianity has the patent on this.
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We’re truely up shit creek with out a paddle now!
I would first like to state humbly and uprightly; everyone who posted comments against my post is correct in stating that I was idiotic for posting this in the first place. At that point in my life, I was truly upset about people joining a faith in which the divinity was what I believed to be no more than an afterthought. In the past months I have reflected upon this post and have realized that it is not my place to damn anyone to hell for believeing what they want to believe. I believe in the beliefs of Christianity, and for me, they are true. I have learned that for peole of other religions, including this one, that the followers may find truth in their own certain religion. It was wrong of me to blow up. I would like to official retract any statement in the above post which has offended anyone. I am truly sorry for my arrogance (and bad grammer!). I love my God as much as you love yours, and for me to deny you that right is just plain wrong. I hope you will find it in your hearts to forgive. Know that I have matured and am much more tolerant of those whose beliefs arte different than mine.
Thank you,
Menges
…unfortunately, still no sharper at spotting a joke…
.
Must..
Resist..
Urge..
To..
Call..
Fluffy…
Christian…
A…
Retard…
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Oh, who am I trying to kid.
.
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Your religion holds no truth. It is made up, like this one. You’re an idiot.
@Nowtheworldhasmeaning
..We’re truely up shit creek with out a paddle now!..
No Bobby’s got a few!
Thank you for your heartfelt post, Joshua. It takes a brave soul to retract such embarrassing vitriol. We all have times in our lives when venting our frustrations is a necessary evil and to keep it bottled up could lead to even worse repercussions. Thank you for choosing us to berate, for it allowed us to vent, as well. I for one accept your apology, offer forgiveness, and wish you well in all your future endeavors.
Mad John Kidd
@ Joshua Menges,
.
Just chiming in to agree with Mad John Kidd. Thank you for posting your recent message. It’s great to know that you have progressed as a person, that you’re brave enough to stick your hand up and acknowledge mistakes, and that you’ve achieved such a tolerant viewpoint. I don’t think I could really attack you even if I wanted to, now.
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Keep thinking and maturing (which is what we’re all trying to do, after all) - and well done, sir.
@ Joshua Menges
My feelings echo those of Mad John an J!!
RAmen
Perhaps I’m just extremely cynical - am I the only one here wondering if that apology is really sincere?
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It’s *not* an apology. It doesn’t say “Bobby, I’m sorry I called you a really offensive word, when I have no idea what your sexuality is, and it’s none of my damn business, and there’s nothing wrong with being gay anyway, even if you are, and you’re probly not”. It doesn’t say “I understand the point and I’m really sorry I misjudged you guys.” It doesn’t acknowledge the true purpose of what Bobby’s set out to do at all. No, instead the post basically says “Look, I can forgive you pagans because I’m better than you, I still hold all the same beliefs, I’ve learned nothing, I’m just covering my ass, ’cause my pastor did a sermon about tolerance and now I’m worried I’ve damned myself to hell along with all you heathen queers, and I’ve not been sleeping well. Best fix it up with the big guy upstairs., so there - I’ve apologised (but I know in my heart of hearts you’re all gonna burn, burn, burn, BURN…”
.
I betcha. Money, if you like.
To davey jones slacker,
I’m sorry you feel that way. What i wrote WAS intended to be an apology. If you need it verbatim, then I am truly sorry for what I wrote. I did not mean to offend anyone who holds these beliefs. My religion is as true to me as your is to you. Toleration? Yes I suppose it could be defined as that, but that’s not how I see it. I just want to live in a world where people can interpret the apology of a guy who feels absolutely horrible about what he wrote.
I’M TRULY VERY SORRY! Please believe me,
MENGES
@Joshua
I accept your apogee. I further invite you to discuss your beliefs and post constructive arguments for your beliefs. I would especially like to hear how you feel about the original context of this Website – teaching of Creationism v. evolution in our public schools.
Wow. Imagination in religion? How absurd (sarcasm). Seriously people, what ISN’T imagination. Whatever you sense in your environment can only be interperted by your mind, and whatever you make of your sensory imput only has meaning if you think about it create ideas based on it. In other words, whatever you think is really just part of your imagination. There is no real definition. Even reality is just an agreed upon interpertation of what incromprehensibly little we know about the “universe” (Whatever that is - sorta sarcasticly). As such, God, The Flying Spaghetti Monster, Buddha, Allah, The Easter Bunny (AKA Jesus), Aquaman, the French, and pudding are all imaginary. Honestly, they wouldn’t be any fun if they were any other way.
“Full of Rage I am ”
Killed me LOL that did!
Fuck Me! We’re being abused by Yoda!
Joshua, I love you, but I had no idea about this side of you.
We actually aren’t making fun of your god, you just choose to be offended by something that is different than yourself. You, however, are making fun of the FSM.
“how full of rage I am”. Dear god, if your going to insult someone, LEARN TO TALK!!! (Well, type.)
Learn English, por favor.
It’s been a while since I’ve posted my original rant (if you can call it that) and my apologies. I would just like to further reiterate that I have recanted everything I had originally said, and I can now honestly say that I don’t agree with one word I wrote. I was an egomanical jerk at the time, bent on forcing my beliefs onto others. I was frustrated with the indifference toward religion in America and voiced my frustration in an inappropriate manner. If at all possible, I would really appreciate if this page were removed. If anything, it would spare me from further guilt. I am truly sorry, and I truly do mean it. God Bless.
@Joshua Menges Sep 10th, 2007 at 5:28 am
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Nice initiative, my dear friend. Way to go! My turn now.
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Hrrrm.
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It’s been a while since I’ve been elected pope, and chose the name of Benedictus XVI. I would just like to further reiterate that I wish to recant everything I have said since, and I can now honestly say that I don’t agree with one word I said or wrote. I was an egomanical jerk at the time, bent on forcing my beliefs onto others. I was frustrated with the indifference toward Catholicism in the world and voiced my frustration in an inappropriate manner. If at all possible, I would really appreciate if the Vatican be transformed into a museum. If anything, it would spare me from further guilt. I am truly sorry, and I truly do mean it. I hereby resign from my papal duties, and long live the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
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RAmen!
@Joseph Ratzinger Sep 10th, 2007 at 6:33 am
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Nicely put, matey! What will be the entrance fee?
I believe you are sorry for your original rant, but allow me to offer the suggestion that before you talk to people about any of the 4 no-no’s (religion, politics, drugs, sex)you research your own beliefs and views, if you had done this i’m sure you would never have written that letter in the first place as you would have found that if you trace it’s history, your own religion is man made, as are all religions that have been traced to their sources, with only the words of ‘prophets’ to back it up, also the ways of what you believe preach tolerance, forgiveness, mercy and humbleness, maybe you should practice what you preach? Just a few suggestions for all.
Have Fun all! =p
@ Joseph Ratzinger and Associates
I believe that the initial rant by Joshua was both egomanical and inappropriate, as he has stated here. It is far out of line for anyone to judge another human being based on their religion. However, he has retracted that belief multiple times and apologized to those whom he has offended. I encourage you all to think of yourselves. How many times have you erred? Is a part of your life permanantly on the internet for other people to judge? Is is really fair that you, essentially, are continuing the cycle of ignorance by judging Mr. Menges based on nothing but a prejudiced letter he wrote and later retracted.
In any church, Catholic or otherwise, forgiveness is taught. As a practicing Roman Catholic, it is taught that any individual can seek forgiveness for any action as long as they are truly repentant. It sounds like Mr. Menges is truly repentant. So for those individuals who cannot come to terms with forgiveness, maybe you should not call yourself a religious person at all.
Religion is a strange thing. It seems to give people authority to do whatever they want. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a catholic, but it seems that while you claim to know everything there is to know about God and the bible you have forgotten one of Jesus’ most famous teachings : “Let the one among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone” John 8:7
In other words, who are you to judge?
“May you rot in the fiery bowels of the poor misguided follower who bestows his faith in you.”
Are Christians now claming that the FSM gives you a sore arse? I think they are getting confused with curry. That can give you a Johnny Cash! (Ring of Fire)
‘
“Flying spaghetti monster is as believable as the boogie man or other stupid creatures” You mean like god, satan, angels and so on. I admit they do seem a bit far fetched.
‘
“No to believe that a spaghetti controls my life is crazy and stupid.” No less crazy and stupid than believing it is a beardy old bloke in the sky. And there is no need to be rude about our religion.
‘
“go read the bible or jump off the nearest cliff cause no one has use for you ” Charming! Is that really is how you feel about us? Didn’t your Jesus once say”For if you forgive men for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.” You don’t seem very forgiving.
‘
“you would go so far as to make fun of my God?” No of course not. But you are making fun of ours. Let he who is without sin…
‘
“The starter of such a church will be the one answering to God for the number of lost souls given to the FSM cause”
If there is a God. If… if…
‘
“I realize that an email from a Christian will do nothing to stop you from sending more of Earth’s population to Hell”
Of for FSM’s sake! This God you talk of sounds like a totally evil, spitefull bastard. Wanting to be worshipped and told how great he is, and chucking people into hell if they don’t To be honest I wouldn’t want to go to heaven if it was run by someone so unstable and cruel.
.
Why are Christians so unlike Christ?
He taught love, where as so many of his followers teach hate, and are so quick to judge other people. (one of the things Jesus taught against)
I’d be glad to go to hell, if only to be far away from such narrow minded, rude, intolerant people who seem to act like total arseholes “in the name of Jesus” (and I’d have more chance of meeting Jimi Hendrix!)
.
“Judge not, that ye be not judged (Matthew 7:1)”
@Allison (Yes that allison)
““Let the one among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone” John 8:7″
Is it just me, or does that seem to be Christians least favorite Jesus quote?
“Full of rage I am.”
I am in possession of happy. Why rage you are?
Sir?
I never knew Christian’s were such potty mouths!
I have read the bible and I don’t remember Jesus ever talking like this. But then I found a passage from the Sermon On The Mount which goes…
“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you… You fucking fags. You’ll burn in hell if you don’t you retarded fishermen!”
So it seems Jesus was more like his followers than I thought.
Fuck…
what a weird writing style…
The word count and determination of a respectable human being…
And yet the mindless incomprehendability of a man possessed…
.
.
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…By a twat.
I have heard of one of those rare things you find nowadays called a… “JOKE”!
A ’satirical violation”! Gaspeth! Don’t you get that this is a joke, and that you can ignore it if you want to, but if you send violent hate mail you better expect us to get pissed off too.
Have you even noticed that nobody actually believes this? Have you seen that through all this, people are just trying to make jokes, until people like you show up and ruin it? I can’t Count the number of times I’ve had to explain, either lightly or firmly, that somebody who can’t appreciate a joke should just go leave the internet and get a life other than just insulting people’s satire?
I don’t know about you, but I’d think that you would have something better to do than rant about your hatred of free spirit. Why don’t you just go back to your stupid church and read the bible another 50 times. I’m getting so sick of people who can’t take a joke just because it “defies their religion.” Go find a better way to spend your time.
Hey, I don’t know where the town of Red Lion, PA is, but there is a bar in Dingmans Ferry, PA that is called the Red Lion. I guess you think only christians have a right to exploit the masses in finding religion?
That guy dosent knowwhat he is talking about. Why cant he just forgive like he is soppsed to and be happy. why belive in something if it dosent make you happy…?
Angie is cool
Yes, I’m all tha and a bag of Potato Chips.
I actually favorited this page… just to show in my report “What religion can do to people and why the Spaghetti Monster doesn’t work that way”
“[A] satirical violation of the First commandment,” what a lovely locution! My god loves your god, does yours love mine?
ah well. He misses the point, which is that the FSM created the bible. in fact, i have it on good authority that the paper on which the bible was originally written was actually made of pasta pulp. Coincidence?
Josh, spot on. It takes guts to do what you did. Consider yourself forgiven, and I would be honored if you would stick around for a little while. Good, intelligent conversation never hurts anyone, and it would be great to see the perspective of someone who has the Christian view, but understands what we are about.
Mare Lacrimarum
(Sea of Tears)
“Your A Fag,” is wrong, should stand at the end, like this: “Yours, A. Fag” Strange name btw, maybe you can get a free namechange.
Why do you assume that we are wrong? We might be right and where would that leave you? With stale beer and VD strippers until you have sereved noodles long enough.
Beer, Josh?
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rAmen,
Jacqueline Sparrow
“Full of rage, I am”.?
Who’s his editor? Yoda?
So are you saying the Creator doesnt like italian food?
I think it is really interesting how people who tend to take their own religious beliefs seriously will automatically think others see their own deity, religion, etc. in exactly the same way. I mean, you could make up absolutely anything, tell a them it is your religion, and they will go nuts. I’m not sure if I’m getting my idea across. I mean, a “true believer” will jump to the conclusion that your are also a “true believer” even if your “belief” is in the divinity of tree frogs.
Have you actually seen/felt/heard/smelled/tasted God? Every religion is the same BS over again.
THIS, is no different, however, I actually believe this religion.
Anybody who thinks this is just a childish game is wrong, and if you’re a Christian while saying that, you’re a total hypocrite, because there’s just as much a use as believing in God than FSM.
Does not the thought of a person in the clouds sound just as “foolish” as a flying ball of delicious pasta?
Answer me this.
YAY FSM!
I’m laughing my ass of here. This hate mail makes so little sense in so many ways. For example, how can someone be smart enough to type difficult stuff like “exploit the ignorance of the confused masses that are struggling to find their religious beliefs” yet, cannot stick to simple grammar.
You’re –> you are –> Indicates the state which the person who is talked to is in.
Your –> Indicates the object is the possession of the person who is talked to.
See the difference?
V_V
I deffinetly agree with ninjapanda
sooo, HMPH!!!1
bish…
“a manmade god is damned”
Heck it - then all gods are damned.
Joshua Menges, you figured it all out. Man there is no foolin you. How dare us, we are all fags. I never realized it before. You have opened my eyes. I think I am going to follow the word of Joshua from now on, Who’s with me? Josh! Josh! Josh! Josh! Josh!
I really dislike when people respond to these posts using poor grammar, childish name-calling, and other forms of immature and unintelligent arguments. If you are going to give a response of disgust to a message like this one; please use correct English and please don’t just reciprocate the hate back to them. Tear apart thier argument, break it down at its most fundamental levels, and on its surface. Attack its thesis, and its terrible usage of the English language. Try to use logical arguments based off of fact. Here’s an example of how I would reply to this message:
Joshua,
This website has a point. If you, as a Christian, are offended by that; so be it. Judge not, lest ye be judged. I could make an argument that you are going to hell in your own religion because you have already committed sins even according to your own faith. The sins in your argument are also surely not your only offenses to your own God; I’d be willing to guess you have also “done Satan’s will” through masturbation, premarital intercourse, and various other perfectly healthy and natural phyiscal and biological processes which you have deemed “unholy sins.” Who are you then to try to impose any of your moral standards on Bobby Henderson, his followers, or our God?
Just yesterday a few crazy preaching Christians came on to my campus. They belittled all of us for our beliefs. They preached to us that we were going to burn in Hell for all eternity. They called all homosexuals out and said they would be “taking the wrath of God for being fags.” Do you honestly think these men, these preachers, have any room to speak when it comes to being decent and holy? You might justify yourself by saying, “that wasn’t me, I didn’t call homosexuals faggots and tell them they would rot” as a defensive response… In actuality though, what you did was a slightly less direct form of just the same type of hate. You are no better than those bigots that you see protesting the funeral of a soldier from Iraq just because of his sexual orientation. I have one other legitmate question that you might be able to answer for me, if your God is all powerful and doesn’t like gays, why does he continue to make men and women who are born without heterosexual drives? He can create the universe and everything we know, but he can’t make a man love a woman? That seems like a task that should be pretty trivial to some omnipotent super being with such and impressive resume.
You say, because we don’t believe in your God that we are going to Hell in your religion.
You go against your own faith to judge us, you pass on your morals as though you were God himself. You have then, by your own moral standards committed yourself to Hell in your religion.
Plus there’s an added bonus here:
You don’t believe in our God, so you are going to Hell in our religion. Enjoy the VD and terrible beer.
Sincerely,
Captian Crotch.
P.S. - Did you say “full of rage I am”? Is “Joshua Menges” just a cover for you actually being Yoda?
Why do these people keep calling us fags? Why is “scoundrel” in quotations? And “Full of rage I am” sounds like a very angry Yoda. How can this person say that God cannot be materialized? God managed to have a child. Angels have to be real physical beings with real flaming swords. You can put a metaphysical spin onto this, but Jesus did in a human form ascend upwards. Right? Heaven has to be above us, a physical place where more than one has ascended (Enoch (Gen 5:24); Elijah (2 Kgs 2:1-12); Paul (2 Cor 12:2-4); and John (Rev 4:1). If you really think about Jesus back then, what he said, how he is said to have talked about Heaven and God, they were to him physical beings. Don’t try to modernize your voodoo and make it something that it’s not. And back to the core of the FSM, do not try to make it science.
Did anyone ever tell you that your god is a man-made creation every bit as much a FSM is. Well, it is, confused grasshopper. Sputter all you want, the truth is in the tracks. Yaweh is a creation of the cultures of the bronze age. You know that good old time when rulers ruled absolutely and would have no other rulers obeyed before them.
Those bronze age rulers dealt harshly with any number of offenses, usually requiring death by stoning for most everything. Coincidentally, so does Yaweh for infractions against the Ten commandments.
Sass one’s parents-death by stoning
Worship a strange god before him-dealth by stoning.
Fail to keep holy the Sabbath–death by stoning.
Adultery-Care to guess the penalty?
And of course those rulers were extremly war-like and pushed their followers to invade foreign lands, seize the wealth of those nations for themselves (and the ruler) kill all the men, rape all the women, and enslave their children, and so does Yaweh. When the Hebrews conquered Jerico, Yaweh instructed the Hebrew conquerors to kill everyone-men women and children and enslave those who lived in the outskirts. Read your bible, it’s in there.
By the way, did you know that Yaweh actually gave Moses 11 comandments. The one that always get omitted is “Do Not Suffer a Witch to Live”. Gee, I wonder why that is.
Could it be that God is the creation of a mindset that saw nothing particularly wrong with rape, pillage, genocide, and murder of anyone outside one’s tribe, because that’s the way man lived and thought 3500 years ago.
Of course today, such things are an obvious embarassment to most Xtains, so much so that they pretty much say that the bible, though authored by God, was done through the imperfect agency of the authors of that era, and that god, therefore, is not really the bloodthirsty bastard he is portrayed as by the typical thinkers of that age.
Everyone says that of course, but the fundamentalists. They have no problem with that kind of a god, because they are the most backward and unregenerate among us. Some of them actually advocate bringing America under the laws of Leviticus in much the same ways as the Mullas or Saudi Arabia, Iran, and a host of other Islamic countries have brought those nations under Sharia law.
Yes, that does mean they want us stoning adulters. And even the ones who don’t wish to go that far are notorious for saying snippy little things like New Orleans experienced the wrath of God for being friendly to gays (John Hagee) and the destruction of the world trade center was the result of the US tolerating a whole bunch of stuff from feminism to gay rights (Jerry Falwell).
In short, in all the western democracies, these people are the hard core that just doesn’t get it, and apparantly this poster is among their lot.
Ha ha ha! I’m so happy I could dance, I can’t believe I found this website, oh help me, this is too much…
I’m laughing so hard that I’m crying. What an absolutely delightful symphony of intelligence and dementia.
*In Yoda voice* “Full of rage I am, yes?” Yeah, it might be a joke that you don’t get. (I’m sure you don’t get plenty of things.) I’m a Buddhist (and a recent Pastafarian). Should Buddhists be told to read the Bible because they believe differently than you? (I have, by the way, many times…. and the Book of Mormon, and the Satanic Bible, and the Qu’ran)…. The Satanic Bible, by the way…. funny as shit. You should look into it. (Oh, no sense of humor… my bad.) Or maybe we should all jump off a cliff like lemmings, with the Dalai Lama leading the way into oblivion.
The FSM is no more rediculous than an invisible bearded man in the sky that can’t keep the three factions that beleive in him from killing each other off, along with everyone else. (For that matter, it’s no more rediculous than my beleiving that reincarnation is possible, or that your subconcious mind defines how you spend “eternity” while you’re dying….. Judging itself, as it were.) You beleive that man was created in “God’s” own image. How is that not materializing “God” into one’s own desire of what you want it to be?
I don’t condemn your religeon as something heretical just because I beleive something other than what you beleive in… and if the Pastafarians started a campaign to be considered equal to Buddhists, I would support them all the way, as would the Dalai Lama I think, with laughter abound.
Suffer your guilt alone, for no one here suffers with you.
Actually, this religion DOES make more sense than Christianity. I don’t believe in FSM as a concrete being, but as a symbol of how useless and Bullshitty religion really is.
Besides, you shouldn’t be arguing about this as you clearly don’t possess the capacity of forming a clear argument. You are just saying that your ‘God’ makes more sense than ours, which is not true at all. I would rather believe in FSM (yummy) than ‘Oh, I sent my son to die for your sins! But wow! He didn’t really die! What a surprise!’ -shit.
Thank you.
“your whole Flying spaghetti monster is as believable as the boogie man or other stupid creatures. this religon seems to be just based on a childs creative mind. This makes me think all younger generations now are full with idiots like you.”
Must… contain… sarcasm… Must… contain… OHDAMNIT’SJUSTTOOFREAKINGHARD!
And hey, rot in the bowels? Haven’t heard that one before. I assume it’s idiocy-induced? Sounds pretty painful. Maybe you should take something for it.
Hey NP.
I believe in this religion to, but not because it makes sence to me.
I believe because this religion is no different then others, no matter how crazy it sounds.
I mean, is a man walking on water any different then flying spaghetti?
I love you guys, I even wrote a quick bible for the FSM.
dont insult my faith or I will insult yours
yah, and anyway we dont condem your religion dont make condem of ours.
While intelligent, with proper punctuation, it seems like you put thought into this. Since you probably aren’t going to read this comment, i’m probably wasting my time saying that everyone here is here to make a point.
Oh no! Not long words AND a long post! I’ll never find a flaw in this perfect argument!
…
Hey, wait a second… AHA! THERE IS A FLAW! HIS GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION! BWHAHA!
What excuse of a Creator would send some of the “Earth’s population to Hell” because they happened to be brought up in a society which happened to worship a different diety? Don’t act all smartass on us and also use the words ‘fag’, ‘idiots’ and ‘crazy’. It’s completely illogical.
So its ok to advertise christianity on tv, movies, radio shows, and cartoons but someone puts up a website and you freak out. You may think we are weird but look at all those “Christians” that protested Harry Potter because it was witch craft. Seriously let people believe what they wanna believe. Were not telling anyone they have to join our religion. For a “Christian” your not very accepting!
(To the angry Christian)
You might want to go ahead and see the light- of reason. I understand that you must feel irate about being made fun of by thousands of people who think you are stupid. I would be too, but luckily I’m not, so I don’t encounter that situation much. Finding it hard to believe that you actually used the word “satirical” and spelled it correctly, I must advise that you look it up in a dictionary. Someone obviously told you to write it, because if there was any question of our seriousness regarding FSM (RAmen!) in your mind, you need a little bit more than Jesus to guide you. Perhaps consider investing in the Big Brother program. Tell your priest to take his thumb out of your butt long enough to type his own words.
Yo Josh buddy,
Got a question for you. Now, you’re of the mind that the Big Sky Daddy controls your life and, by implication, all of our lives. I say this only because you think the FSM controls our lives, and I can’t imagine you feel that your god would do less for you, than you think ours would do for us. So, if your god controls our lives, isn’t it true that he controls one Mr. Bobby Henderson, the prophet of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster? In other words, doesn’t he want the prophet, and by extension, us, to be here? What could there possibly be for the prophet to answer for? He is, after all, only doing what your god wants him to be doing.
We love to fly, we love pasta and we love meatballs…therefore we love the flying spaghetti monster…
Wow, that’s embarrassing. I, also, misspelled “sataire”.
Well, so I retract the spelling but leave the rest.
“how dare you exploit the ignorance of the confused masses that are struggling to find their religious beliefs. . How can you sleep at night knowing your blasphemous lips have preached utter debauchery. ”
“this religon (Christianity) seems to be just based on a childs creative mind.
Isn’t that what Jesus did.
If you think about Christianity started out as a cult.
so were misleading the masses? i think most of us here are relitivly smart is that an ok assumption? (im sorry if i misspell shit) now we chose to give up what ever religion we had before and take up this one, we wernt grown up with it as im sure you were. now ok lets think… how many pastafarian priests rape kids… 0 as far as i know… how many crusades were in the name of the FMS… again 0… ok now this is my favorate… look at all the murders in america. ok now look at how many are christian gasp its a shit load. and there not going to hell cuz there cristian? oh yes and of corse some prick ranting about washiping idols and repentance will convince me. now i personaly am atheist but i beleve in the whole FSM ideals (plus FSM heaven PWNS) so do u think it is your job to convert everyone to think and act and say and do as u do? yay high five for comunism (sorry for any misspellings or nonsencical rantings its late and i got a lot to say)
lol also i would liek to point our that you sir are an ignorant bastard for saying fag and thinking ur so cool… isnt that kinda hatefull? isnt hatefull bad?
RAmen!
Chill out, Josh. Aren’t we entitled to our religious beliefs, too?
We can make fun of yours if we feel like it, and believe me, we play a hell of a lot nicer than most of the people who post hate mail here.
I don’t see how believing in the FSM makes us homosexual, or “fags,” as you would say.
You have no proof whatsoever of the existence of your God, and continually ignore the proof against it. Religion is nothing but a load of crap that you use to comfort yourself. Pastafarianism isn’t all that different, but at least we don’t tell people with different beliefs from ours to “go jump off a cliff.” Don’t worry, we’ve gotten worse than that before.
Is a God that looks like Morgan Freeman who sits up in the clouds anymore ridiculous than His Noodly Appendage?
Sorry Ninjapanda, I agree with you so wholeheartedly that my words are not very different from yours.
Peace Love and Pirates!!
I hope the FSM forgives you for your close-mindedness, Joshua.
RAmen.
Your concern has been noted and filed in my Magical Unicorn Fairy Hammer Lockbox of Doom.
(For the record, I do know own a Magical Unicorn Fairy Hammer Lockbox of Doom)
It’s quite funny how his first post makes him sound like a Nigerian e-mail scam, with complex biblical-sounding language, but a complete lack of grammar, or even a basic sense on how English is spoken or written. He sure convinced me to “repent from worshipping (sp) an idol” and thus revert to the natural religion of all people, Christianity. It’s funny how he seems to get in the original post that it’s kinda shady, and might be a joke, but then has a revelation and comes to complete tolerance for our beliefs. Despite how insane they sound, they are after all religious beliefs, and that’s sacred!
I think that some people must fail to recognize a metaphor when they see one.
I love you, good Sir. You have truly made my day.
Please post again, as often as you feel is necessary!
Ahhh, the good old “blasphemy” cry again. Do these xtians not realise that their lord and master got nailed to a bit of wood for blasphemy too? If they were being good and following his lead, they’d be blaspheming too at every opportunity 8)
“Your A Fag,”
A message from the future may be? Or is henderob future relatives with Dr. Lexus?
Idiocracy-
“Kickass, Don’t want to sound like a dick or nothin’ , but Uh says on your chart you’re fucked up. You talk like a fag, and your shit’s all retarded. What I do is like,. . . like you know, *snickers* like you know what I mean like, huh uh ha ha. .. Theres that fag talk we talked about.”
The hypocrisy and irony are just amazing.
–as well as a connection between a divine Creator of heaven and Earth and an Italian dish–
Italian dish? If the British pioneered a Bearded Man Stew, would we call your god an English dish?
–your whole Flying spaghetti monster is as believable as the boogie man or other stupid creatures–
“Invisible old dude” really isn’t much more believable, some would say.
–you would go so far as to make fun of my God?–
What makes yours so untouchable compared to ours? Why are you allowed to make fun of other gods, but others cannot make fun of yours? That’s incredibly biased and hypocritical.
–To materialize a god is to make a god of one’s own desire, giving it it;s traits in accordance to what you want it to be.–
Not really. A god doesn’t need to be materialized to give it traits. I can call your god “smelly,” for instance. Or “wet.”
–worshipping an idol–
What makes yours any less of an idol? Your god can be characterized by many of the definitions of “idol.” Biblically, it means a deity besides God himself. To us, then, your god is an idol in a way no less significant than ours is to you.
How dare we, as you put it, “exploit” those masses who are lost? For one, exploit isn’t the word. We chose something that made more sense than Christianity and went with it (… I mean really, a virgin birth?) We CHOSE to come here, we didn’t get smacked in the head with a bible, or brainwash from the time of childbirth. We weren’t recruited into an “army against creativity” or “the ability to actually think for yourself” unlike some. The best part about freedom, dollface, is you get to CHOOSE what it is you want to do, or say, and i say that YOUR religion is bullshit. Besides, what kind of Christian are you anyways? Doesn’t god say not to convey hate towards others? if by some chance Hell DOES exist, ill be sure to save you a seat, love.
Now, now Joshua, there’s no need to be so “Fundamentalist” about this…ever heard of “Tolerance,brotherly love and forgiveness”? Who preached that one then?….oh, and by the way, while you are at it you can always just take a look at the world around you, it doesn’t stop at the East/West Coast/Canadian/Mexican border… I could go on for hours but I work in a Secure Psychiatric Unit FULL of beleivers who found out that they were wrong and I have to attend to them, even though they have found no saviour God still speaks to them and tells them to do BAD things, at least if FSM spoke to them in the same way he would say “Please yourself and don’t blame me”
Tsss. Looks like da deck ain’t been scrubbed proper and there’s more gooey glue than spagghetti on some side of the plates - some don’t know when to turn the fire off in time, dammit. A bunch of tourne-sauces justifying the worst by going down the same bloody drain. Josh, best you drop it ‘n have a beer with Jack, kid, you’re on the right track (more or less), relax and stop cursing people it’s a bad habit, trust me. Don’t worry about being an idiot, everyone is and particularly so for those who claim otherwise. Trust me on that one too. But don’t make it a religion, it’s too true for it to work. Fuck - you got to trust me on that one too, I’m afraid.
And all my condoleances Bobby. Watch yer arse, mate; you already know that high priestessing ain’t what it’s cooked up to be but I bet you got no idea how quick it catches and how long it sticks (especially wid yer raw material). Check that one: “I guess you think only christians have a right to exploit the masses” - Imagine the wigs you’ll have to wear for da next millenium if ya ain’t careful. Mind, if you get too bored ye can always have a snack on the sly while they sacrifice meatballs (if you’re lucky it’ll be just that, but seeing bad history repeated above once more, if it depends on some of your followers, pardon my french, you’ll soon end up eating yer (overcooked) spagghetti from freshly decollared heads on the still bleeding brain). Good luck to ye anyway.
As for Atticus, les Francais t’emmerdent, mon vieux, d’tout’ facon on bouffe mieux qu’vous espece de jaloux so you can stick yer aquapuddings up yer own sweet spagghetti :-DDD