How fucking dare you make

Published March 25th, 2006 by Bobby Henderson

How fucking dare you make fun of my lord and savior Jesus Christ. He died on the cross for my and your sins you fucking peice of shit. You can’t fucking do that you fucking fuck. Go fuck yourself you fuck!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!!! ANTICHRIST!!! YEA, YOUR THE ANTICHRIST YOU FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO GO FUCK UP ISREAL YOU FUCKING FUCK. BOBY BITCHEMSOMS = 666 666 666 PISS WHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!! YOUR GONA BURN IN HELL FOREVER YOU LARGE FUCK. You are an ass crack. You know what an ass crack is bitch? Thats exactly what you look like. Piss whole!!!!! You should go shuve your face up someon’s fucking ass you fucking fuck of a fucking fucker fucky fuck fuck fucker fucky fucker fucky fucker fucky fuck fuck!!!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!! YOU RUIN EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!! YOUR LEADING THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE INTO HELL YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!!! YOU HAVE NO FUCKING RIGHT TO DO THAT YOU FUCKING BASTARD GO FUCK YOUR SELF OR FUCK A TREE OR FUCK YOUR WIFE!!!!!!!! GO FUCK THE FLYING SPHIGETTI MONSTER YOU FUCK!!!!!! -Guido Arbia



316 Responses to “How fucking dare you make”

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  1. Guido Arbia says:

    Hey guys! i just wanted to tell you guys that I am a complete hypocrite, but I am a hypocrite that believes that God forgives me for my hypocrisy because His blood has washed away my sins, which includes hypocrisy. A real hypocrite is someone who never confesses that they are a sinner, or more importantly, never tells God that they are a sinner. I told God I am a sinner, and I tell you I am a sinner. I am a filthy rotten sinner, but God forgives me for all my filthy rotten sins because I believe in His Son Jesus Christ.

    You guys don’t understand the Bible. I just want to tell you that. The Bible actually does not contradict itself. The Bible does not have inconsistencies or plot holes or anything like that. Stuff in the old testament is followed through in the new testament in such a way that it is not forced, but natural, because the old testament was written with the new testament in mind. Men did not make it up and embellish it later on. They wrote as God directed them.

    “…knowing this first, that no prophecy of the scripture is of any private interpretation. For the prophecy came not in old time by the will of man: but holy men of God spake as they were moved by the Holy Ghost.” (2 Peter 1:20-21)

    We did not evolve from lower life forms. You can point to all the fossils you want but the fact of the matter is information cannot be derived through unguided material processes. It is mathematically impossible. I don’t care how many random mutations you add up, and how many selective pressures you have. The information is just not going to form in the first place. In fact, it is just going to create noise in the DNA and increase the chances that the organism dies. Common sense and logic do not point to evolution. They point to a Creator. Plain and simple.

    • SillyKiwiMan says:

      Can’t be the same Gweeds.

      Nice trolling from whoever posted this. It has the same stink of deliberate stupidity and a nice nod to hypocrisy, but it seems more inflammatory than preachy.

      Either way,

      Yarrgh.

      • Keith says:

        Perhaps there is an organisation (or disorganisation) called Guido Arbia. When one has a brain explosion or runs out of verbal diaorrhea someone else takes the helm.

    • Captain Birdseye says:

      Guido, you seem to have dug up and are flogging the rotting corpse of the dead horse of the Creationist misunderstanding of the Second Law of Thermodynamics. We do not live in a closed system; the information you refer to comes from, or rather, disorder is given to, our surroundings, all powered by the Sun.
      The fossils you refer to are within you. Are you aware that half of your DNA is fragments of viruses, fossils of your ancestor’s history of illness? Are you aware that bacteria and viruses party and swap bits of DNA? Are you aware that your gene to make vitamin C is broken and doesn’t work; but broken in exactly the same place and way as in monkeys and bats? That is your past.
      An organism’s desire to survive in a changing World is what accumulates the information you refer to. Unless you hold a Nobel Prize in physics, I suggest you read the work of someone who does.
      I bet you would be great company for a cold beer and meaningful conversation…. provided people simply listened to you spout rubbish.

      • Apprentice Frederic says:

        Cap’n Birdseye: speaking of rotting corpses, it seems clear that Guido – having reappeared several times too many, now – walks with the Legion of the Undead. All of Pastafariandom must pray for a new Dr. Van Helsing to drive a bundle of uncooked spaghetti thru his heart; I know that there are many such! R’Amen

  2. theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

    No contradictions in the BuyBull? Hey, Jesus! Who’s your grandpa?
    MAT 1:16 And Jacob begat Joseph the husband of Mary, of whom was born Jesus, who is called Christ.

    LUK 3:23 And Jesus himself began to be about thirty years of age, being (as was supposed) the son of Joseph, which was the son of Heli.

    Want to believe in god? Fine by me, but by burying your nose in the Bible, Koran, Torah, or any other book, you are limiting your god immensely.

    • Guido Arbia says:

      The nuances of the original Greek do not come through in this translation. In the original Greek, the antecedent for “which” is Jesus, and Jesus is the Son of Heli because he is the son of Mary and Mary is the son of Heli. So there is no contradiction.

      http://www.mountainretreatorg.net/faq/birth2.html

      • SillyKiwiMan says:

        Oh, and I suppose all the other utterly ridiculous things and contradictions are also misinterpreted? Or are they metaphors?

        What little credibility the religious have (none whatsoever in my view) is seriously undermined by their constant moving of goalposts and changing the definition of words.

      • TheFewTheProudTheMarinara says:

        Mary is the son of Heli?? I did NOT see that coming, Guido. The fundamentalists’ (i.e. no fun, damn stubborn and half mental) view of traditional marriage just took a MAJOR hit!

      • theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

        Nuance these, Guido. http://www.evilbible.com/Biblical%20Contradictions.htm

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  4. Rasputin says:

    Did you know that Jesus wasn’t actually called “Jesus”? It’s true. His real name was Joshua. The word “Jesus” is actually the Greek version of the same name, a bit like the name “Guy” is a version of “Guido” or “William”. Similarly, “John” is a version of “Johan” or “Hans”. So how can we trust the BuyBull when it can’t even get the name of its number one character correct?

  5. Guido Arbia says:

    The reason why the Greek is translated Jesus is because the translators chose to translate it that way. That means that the name is correct because it is the translation that was chosen for the Greek.

    Now let me ask you a question. You say that if God existed, he would be wicked because he commands genocide. Do you believe genocide is wrong? If you believe genocide is wrong, then do you believe in absolute morals? If you don’t believe in absolute morals, then why do you believe that genocide is wrong? I’m not saying that it’s not wrong, because I don’t believe that is what God commanded, but since you believe it’s wrong, and since you want to make God culpable, you have to reconcile that with your view that absolute morals don’t exist.

    • theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

      I don’t hold god culpable any more than I think Santa ate all the cookies. The Old Testament just wanted to make Jahweh out to be a bad-ass.

      • SillyKiwiMan says:

        Fear is a great way to control people, especially if they ask awkward questions. Just threaten them with eternal damnation or tell them they’ll be smited.

      • Jo Switten says:

        Santa ate all the cookies???? OMFSM!

    • SillyKiwiMan says:

      Gweeds, I’m not going to engage you in an “if god existed” scenario. It’s pointless. You’ll probably claim that it means we acknowledge the existence of it. It proves nothing when you throw around hypothetical crap. Trying to use morality (an entirely human construct) as proof for a deity is a fool’s argument. We could argue that evil is proof of your god (but you’d claim that it’s Satan, not god, and then claim that it’s again proof for your god) and so the pointless argument will go on.

      Again you claim to be the guardians of all that is good. You reduce a complex concept to “god says this is good or bad, and that’s it” while somehow still acknowledging shades of grey when it suits you to.

      You’re still a fool, and like your ilk, a hypocrite.

    • Rasputin says:

      Good thinking. There are lots of bright people using this website.

    • Bill T. says:

      So if a translator chooses a particular interpretation, that defines truth? OH Boy! I’ma gonna learn Greek and make my own translation of the Christian Gospels!

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