How fucking dare you make fun of my lord and savior Jesus Christ. He died on the cross for my and your sins you fucking peice of shit. You can’t fucking do that you fucking fuck. Go fuck yourself you fuck!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!!! ANTICHRIST!!! YEA, YOUR THE ANTICHRIST YOU FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO GO FUCK UP ISREAL YOU FUCKING FUCK. BOBY BITCHEMSOMS = 666 666 666 PISS WHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!! YOUR GONA BURN IN HELL FOREVER YOU LARGE FUCK. You are an ass crack. You know what an ass crack is bitch? Thats exactly what you look like. Piss whole!!!!! You should go shuve your face up someon’s fucking ass you fucking fuck of a fucking fucker fucky fuck fuck fucker fucky fucker fucky fucker fucky fuck fuck!!!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!! YOU RUIN EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!! YOUR LEADING THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE INTO HELL YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!!! YOU HAVE NO FUCKING RIGHT TO DO THAT YOU FUCKING BASTARD GO FUCK YOUR SELF OR FUCK A TREE OR FUCK YOUR WIFE!!!!!!!! GO FUCK THE FLYING SPHIGETTI MONSTER YOU FUCK!!!!!! -Guido Arbia
How fucking dare you make
Published by Bobby Henderson March 25th, 2006 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 195 Comments
195 Responses to “How fucking dare you make”
Dear Guido,
Please refrain from writing comments when you are not on your daily dose of thorizine.
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Wow…right after he sent that comment I bet his head exploded like that guy in “Scanners”
the part I can’t stop laughing at is “YOU RUIN EVERYTHING!!!”
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Thats the greatest comment I have ever read in my entire life
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Wasn’t “Guido” the name of that alien that Han Solo killed near the begining of Star Wars IV?
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Wow. I’m without words. He actually sat there at a keyboard and typed “You should go shuve your face up someon’s fucking ass you fucking fuck of a fucking fucker fucky fuck fuck fucker fucky fucker fucky fucker fucky fuck fuck!!!!! ”
How many drafts do you suppose he wrote?
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Ahahahhahahahahaahahahahaah!
This is funnier then anything I’ve seen.
Idiot.
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Midget in Pirate Regalia -
Comments like yours should carry labels: “WARNING: May cause milk to spray out of your nose”. I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time.
I don’t think it’s a question of how many drafts he wrote, but how many drafts he drank. Budweiser will do that to you.
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Isn’t there some rule in christianity about not swearing?? Maybe I’m wrong. But wow. This guy is completely cracked.
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Oh my! Jesus must be covering his eyes and shaking his head over this one. He’s probably thinking, “Mental note to self – Smite Guido, he’s batshit crazy.”
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” YOUR GONA BURN IN HELL FOREVER YOU LARGE FUCK.”
How is that so? in your religon all we have to do is say a couple hail marys and your on your way to heaven supposedly.
Why are you spamming us anyways, none of your spam will alter our decsion on what to believe. Do you think your god wants you to force people to believe in him? If he created us then why would he give us the ability to think for ourselves and not believe?
Ive been to many chruches/sinagogs/ceremonies with many religions for i was looking for some guidance yet i found the same thing. Every chruch or sinagog i went to, half way through these guys pass around baskets, and no its not to put trash in, they ask you for your money. Lets say a church is about to go broke, isnt that gods will? Why would he want a church that praised him to go broke?
Who wrote the bible? OH lemme guess what your going to say “there were scriptures that depicted his life.” EHH wrong, couldve as easily been a fairy tale or good night story. And yes, there couldve been a man named “god” or “jesus”. OMG you know what would be cool? if we wrote about how david blane did all these cool things and give them stale bread and wine! Maybe there will one day be a religon made for him because the future finds these scriptures and make a bible.
God didn’t make earth/the universe/heaven. He has to BE SOMEWHERE to make something. where was god when he made earth? the universe you may say, where was god when he made the universe? you may say heaven, where was he when he made heaven? mm he had to be somewhere to make something.
So frankly my friend, the FSM is as real as your god.
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Oh my, golly gee! He must be mad or something. Was it something Bobby said?
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what the hell man? chill out will you? crazy fundies…
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this is the funniest thing iv ever read on this website EVER
i can imagine this guildo person typing this comment, his face turning red, the keyboard falling apart, and his ass shitting his pants with the anger and all that shit
hilarious
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Oh gods. . . this is fucking hilarious. . . just the sort of reaction one might expect from somebody who’s brain has been stuffed full of bible belts. . .
My favorite quote – “How fucking dare you make fun of my lord and savior Jesus Christ. He died on the cross for my and your sins you fucking peice of shit. You can’t fucking do that you fucking fuck.”
Well. . . how dare *he* make fun of That which is Noodly? *nod self*
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This is funny!
I’ve never found someone so fond of fucking as him.
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I withdraw my last comment, the next one is worse.
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“Budweiser will do that to you. ”
Yar, and only a landlubber would be botherin’ to drink that swill, ‘nyhow! No pirate worth ‘is salt would wander from Dewar whiskey, Appleton rum, and Guinness long ‘nough to swallow th’ ol’ man’s runoff that is Budweiser!
Unless we be havin’ ‘nother round o’ Alexander Keith’s!
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1.Fuck? Well, sexual intercourse is nice. Please “fuck” me. Would make me happy.
2. Jesus is dead. Very dead. More than 2000 years of dead. He still is, and for every day that passes by, he reaches new levels of dead. He is deader than ever, and by dying twice, he must be just a little more dead than everyone else. However, his death and his rather obscure reasons to reach this level of deadness has very little to do with modern day. He is dead. Get over it.
3. Human beings cannot be “peice of shit” since feces do not think, it is simply piles of remains produced into a brown substance, easy for the body to push out.
4. Bobby is not Antichrist, but those are flattening words.
I am sure he appriciates them.
5.Ass crack? A hole between to buns. Scientific name: Anus
Humans cannot be a crack since then they would be air inbetween the buns, thus void. Bobby is not made of void.
6. Bobby is not a prostitue, ho, whore, harlot, etc. Therefore, the term “bitch” is out of question. Please keep yourself to proper terms when adressing someone outside that type of labor.
7.”Piss whole” is not acceptable english. Please use proper terms.
8.In logical means, one cannot send people to hell since it only exists in tales to frighten children and/or one or two dumbarse.
9. Bastard has several meanings; a type of sword, hybrid, out-of-marriage child, traitor and several others. You probably meant: A sort of muffin.
10.Sphigetti? Who’s that? Some italian guy?
11.There are several words overused and mispelled. Please check these next time. Thank you, FSM is watching over you and will send you to the real actual hell shortly. Have a good day.
12. Gosh, why do I even bother… In other news, Jesus is still dead.
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I’m glad this website exists, it has had me non-stop laughing from all this serious religious debate about a Spaghetti Monster… oh thank you everyone for these wonderful days
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LMFAO wtf?!?! is this guy emptying out his closet on you or somethin? wow.. that was the best comment ever
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You’re a dumb ass.
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You know, just reading this stuff on this site helps me get my daily troubles into perspective. Thanks, Bobby. Love you fan mail.
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Man, these just keep getting better and better :)
Good enthusiasm; nice use of dynamics; but i must say: quite lacking in depth and diversity. Next time try working in something to really catch your reader’s attention and steer clear of such redundant explicatives, there’s plenty to choose from. If you’re struggling for new material, try something in a foreign language. Not only will you break the redundancy of your writing, but you may really grab your reader’s attention by forcing him to stop and wonder about what you’ve said.
Also, the last stanza (and I quote): “GO FUCK YOUR SELF OR FUCK A TREE OR FUCK YOUR WIFE!!!!!!!!”; the first part really reveals a raw, almost furious rage which nearly brought me to tears. And the 8 exclamation points! Brilliant! I could almost feel your anger; that is until I saw “OR FUCK YOUR WIFE” which really shattered the image. Really? “FUCK YOUR WIFE”? Is that supposed to be a bad thing? Remember, you’re trying to induce feelings of guilt and shame, why throw in something that forces your reader’s mind to wander and wonder if the wife’s got a headache again tonight?
All in all, I give it a 6. You have some potential, but you’re going to need to really sit down and do some hard work to be up there with the best.
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I think its time for SOMEONE’s nappie
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This is the stupiest and funniest thing i have read, 38 “Fucks” in one paragraph. I couldn’t stop laughing. However what was the need to be racist??
Just a suggestion, next time put the “fucks” into random different languages like:
spanish-Cogida
German-Bumsen
French-Baise
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Speaking as a lapsed Catholic – He reminds me of our school priest. I think it was rather charming in a ‘Goodfellas’ kind of way – does he stab people with pens??
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Go back to church, ‘Guido’, if that really is your name. If so, that is a fucking stupid name. Notice how I used your own fucking word against you? Look, I did it again! This is the funniest thing I’ve ever read. You need a straight jacket to hold all that extra crazy. Fuck.
RAmen.
~W.A.
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Oh man. Oh man. I’m a Christian and that’s why church is bad. It’s full of those. The guy has a 5 word vocabulary and there’s the representative for all Christendom right there. Lay off the Flying Spaghetti Monster man. So what if he has a noodly appendage? Sheesh. What happened to tolerance? I tolerate noodles. I like noodles. I hope linguini strangles that guy in his sleep. Seriously, he deserves it.
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Guido is smarter then your avergae christian.
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I pray to the FSM that He may provide this misguided person with a dictionary, so that they main bask in the glory of words that He has made, aswell as the ability to write a coherent message that doesnt include the word “fuck” every 5 words.
RAmen.
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Fuck!
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I just used the new translate feature on this particularly amusing bit of mail – it’s even funnier in French!
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hey guido how’s it going, i was just wondering if you decide to you know write another comment like that, could you please leave me out of it, just kind of dumb down the whole jesus is on my side type thing you have going on. i just think it best, and so do my lawers, that we should distance ourselves from one another, you understand?
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Another person who doesn’t understand the meaning oof sataire. People enjoy saying fuck waaaay too much. I bet If Jesus would be pastefarian if he were alive right now, cause he sure as hell wouldn’t be Christian.
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Too bad you can’t just ban his IP address from the site or something. But, I think he would just kill himself because it seems he has nothing better to do than to write hate mail towards us. Guido, you are a sad, sad little man.
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I never thought a Christian could be so immature. But there it is, plain as writing can be. Also I do believe you commited approximately 45 sins of that letter “you fucking piece of shit” (as you said). And well I really wouldn’t want to “fuck the flying spaghetti monster” (once again like you stated). His noodly appendages would not allow such an act, and you would be shunned out of our great heaven. RAmen.
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I accidentally responded to the other post entitled “how dare you…” because both posts use curse words, each relating to sexual practice (I believe, although the word “fag” often refers to a pre-rolled cigarette in some cultures).
So please read my response there and apply here, since the content of your posts is pretty similar anyway.
My addendum, since this post seems to be so much more passionate…
Dear Mr. Arbia,
I salute you for representing Christianity with such candor and enthusiasm! You, sir, are a true and shining example of what the Saved, the Blessed, and the Eternally Elite can be with a public school education and weekly catechism.
I salute you.
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Piss whole?? . You know, I myself always try to do that…as opposed to pissing partly…
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Is Guido actually a step ahead of us all? Is it actually a witty parody of hatemail? I really hope so, because as satire, it’s genius. But as hatemail, it’s *rubbish*.
Come on Guido, let us in on the joke…
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ya what a nice christian boy
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Guido, you have been owned by Enlightened, but I bet you wouldn’t even get it if you read his reply to your nonsense.
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I am laughing so much I have tears in my eyes, what the blue rubbery fuck is this boy on?
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Guido Arbia you have made me laugh thank you, hope you don’t mind that I am laughing at you.
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Somehow, I vaguely think this is a joke….right?
Somebody please tell me this is a joke.
Please?
Regardless, yes, there IS a rule about swearing, mentioned as I recall in Exodus. And if Jesus is so saintly, then why are you, Mr. Arbia, getting so worked up about it? Why do you care? Christians mock pagans and such all the time, in my experience, so why do you get worked up when you even think someone’s doing it to you? And as has been said before, Bobby doesn’t make fun of religion, just ID and the occasionally religious idiots who follow it. Clearly, you are one.
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Fuck!
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“you fucking fuck of a fucking fucker fucky fuck fuck fucker fucky fucker fucky fucker fucky fuck fuck!!!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!….”
There’s either some very bad drugs in there or this guy really needs some serious medical assessment.
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I’m inclined to think the latter. :D
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How could I have missed this all these months?
I have to disagree with some of you folks: Guido’s love message is the best thing I’ve read in a very long time. It was at the ‘you fucking fuck of a fucking fucker fucky fuck fuck fucker fucky fucker fucky fucker fucky fuck fuck!!!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!’ that I totally lost it and burst out laughing.
I’m almost speechless, but I think we should give him some kind of award.
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Nikkiee! You liked the same part. Is it bad drugs or pure genius? As with so many other artistic activities, it’s sometimes hard to decide.
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Actually Fr. Corpus Callosum I think Nikkiee’s first comment
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“fuck”
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Sums it up better
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“Too bad you can’t just ban his IP address from the site or something.”
No! People like this do all our work for us. They show the world what a bunch of irrational, illiterate, cult following psychpaths the fundis really are.
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I have to agree.
I just read your earlier post and I had pretty much the same reaction. This is so totally funny! It’s just wonderful.
Fuck!
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“No! People like this do all our work for us. They show the world what a bunch of irrational, illiterate, cult following psychpaths the fundis really are. ”
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Yeah it is amazing they almost do our job for us, I can’t help mocking them though.
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I am probably one of the only people who has Johova Witnesses running away from my door. The poor guy probably knew he was in for it when I answered with a copy of the communist manifesto in my hand.
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Just as a side note I am not a communist just for those in the USA who truely believe that all atheists are communists. Communism has the same problem religion has it is reliant on faith, and my whole greivence with both is the absolute waste of the gift of consciousness on faith!
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Out of all the creatures to walk on this earth only a tiny amount have ever been given the greatest gift/curse of all and I find it unforgivable that you waste it.
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Atheists aren’t communists? Can I burn my little red book now? Except that I’m not an atheist anymore, now that I’ve decided to follow his noodlyness.
I guess I could still burn my little red book.
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Is there a Christian site like this were we can post our own comments, all tasteful, rational, and with a dose of humor of course? It would be interesting to see how they would respond to our critiques.
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“fucky fuck fuck fucker fucky fucker fucky fucker fucky fuck fuck!!!!!”
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I’m sure I had a girlfriend who used to yell stuff like that… but only under very special circumstances :-)
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AND… I am *so* going to use that as the chorus in a song :-)
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and he is supposed to be “the good guy”?
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fuck you who ever whote that shit i done made my
choice 666 bitch
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PISS WHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!
I go along with that. It is not good for your kidneys or your bladder to hold it in.
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Health tip o’ the day, brought to you by nurse nikkiee!
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Glad to be of service!
As for “…..You should go shuve your face up someon’s fucking ass you fucking fuck..”
well…. not too healthy for both parties either!
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Yes, interesting use of the word “shuve”.
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hey, i have a new math problem
Guido+terets+Jesus=one really messed up guy with no friends
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oh wait, i forgot to mention a million f-bombs as well. man, i fucked that up
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Smite’em all and let the FSM sort’em out!(38 fucks,that’s more than I’ve had all week)
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With a mouth like that it must have been a hard death.
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I must apologize for my limited vocabulary. You see, at the time, I was much younger and did not have the ability to write as I can now. Although it is true that I was being very immature it is also true that my writing was suffiscient for you. You see, you people simply lack the intellegence to comprehend anything beyond the level of what I have written, but now, I shall battle against your rediculous church with a zeal that you have never seen before.
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Wow, hi Guido.
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I see you’re still a retard! How cool for you!
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I love it when people can’t even be arsed to check whether they spelt “intelligence” correctly.
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I’ve shit better idiots than you, child. Why not just fuck off before we make you cry?
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this has got to be the funniest thread i’ve ever laid eyes on…ever. Guido, you are the most degenerate example of human genetic failings that i have ever come across. the stillborn two-headed foetus with a tail was of immeasurably greater value to society than yourself, and i wait with bated breath for the “zeal you have never seen before” that you have promised us. I thought the obese earthquake girl was bad…you are beyond all belief.
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If the saying ‘laughter is the best medicine’ is true then FSMism should have a better health record than even the scientologists claim
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Hmmmm, just did a little Google digging on our boy Guido. Seems like he’s been banished from at least one other forum.
The Forum’s Admin’s response to Guido’s plea to be reinstated was, “No Way!”.
See? There is justice.
Ra’men
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Love thy neighbor Guido. Either that or loosen up a bit, like me. After all I did allow the crusades, didn’t I?
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This is my fist visit to the site..
I’m @ work..
I laughed my ass of ..
That has made my day..
OH man.. that’s funny.
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Apparently, Guido grew a pair since March. Maybe he can amaze us with his superior “intellegence”. Or not. I wonder if his personal Jesus has forgiven him? Or is Jesus forcing him to do penance with a weak appology? Or is he simply a numpty? For answers to these questions and more, please stay tuned for further updates.
RAmen and pass the Parmesan
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“…loosen up a bit, like me. After all I did allow the crusades, didn’t I?”
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Yeah, JC, you musta been stoned outta your goddamn mind *that* day…
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“you people simply lack the intellegence to comprehend anything beyond the level of what I have written, but now, I shall battle against your rediculous church with a zeal that you have never seen before”
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I look forwards to making you look stupid at every trun!
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I will simply start by asking Do you truely believe that Mary was a virgin?
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Well, this shows the diversities of the world…
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@ Guido
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Quote: You see, you people simply lack the intellegence to comprehend anything beyond the level of what I have written,
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What??? Can you please swear a little more so my stupid little brain can understand what you’re saying? I simply lack the intelligence to comprehend anything beyond the word ‘fuck’ typed thirty eight times in one post. Sorry for the inconvenience.
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wow, guido shure has a lot of intelligence, not. and this is christ speaking, not the antichrist
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Oh joy. Oh joy, joy, joy. Pass me the pirate hat, the asthma medication and the copy of 1001 Ways To Spot Someone Making An Unfeasible Tit Of Themselves In Public.
I haven’t laughed so much since the FSM knows when. Sign me up!
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It seems that you are judging my intelligence based on your displeasure with my writing style and my alledged crappy spelling. This clearly demonstrates that you are not an authority on any type of intelligence whatsoever. A person’s intelligence is not to be judged based on a few spelling errors. Your problem is that you are a bunch of stuck up bastards making the pretense of being highly educated.
Maybe you aren’t aware of this, but your belief in the Flying Sphagetti Monster is not in any way a single bit of a threat towards Christianity. History records that the gospel of Christ has been attacked for centuries, yet it has still stood strong. You have to be a complete moron not to come to the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ, and those types of morons do not deserve to be in heaven. God has chosen fools as his children for a reason, and that is to make those who appear wise into complete idiots. Not only will they burn in the fiery pits of hell for all eternity, but they will suffer the mental anguish of knowing that they rejected the one who loved them most. Why should a loving God force heaven upon anyone?
And if it appears that I have said anything that is against my beliefs or what I have written in this message and the one before it, that person is not me. He is an imposture. I know that some of you will attempt to make me look dumb by impersonating me. Therefore this style of writing is given as evidence of my true identity.
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Guido,
Perhaps you would be wise to thunder off to another website of discourse.
You add nothing to this discussion.
Now for important topics. Can pizza be considered a food group?
Ra’men
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Guido,
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You’ve got me. I am a stuck-up bastard. Hey ho. Sue me.
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You’re right again. The FSM is not a threat to Christianity, any more than the Loch Ness Monster is a threat to the Tooth Fairy. There are plenty of decent threats to Christianity all over the place, though. To name but two: Ken Ham and Guido Arbia. If the FSM brings a few Guido Arbias out of the woodwork to show every thinking human being what a shambles of dribbling idiocy Christianity is at its core, then he’s earning his plunder nicely.
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‘God has chosen fools as his children for a reason, and that is to make those who appear wise into complete idiots.’ Congratulations. That is the first time I have heard a Christian say ‘I’m right because I’m a fuckwit’. Your argument has the quality of honesty, at least.
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‘Why should a loving God force heaven upon anyone?’ Quite right. Of course, a really loving god would equip them with brains and evidence that he doesn’t exist and send them to hell. Obviously.
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‘And if it appears that I have said anything that is against my beliefs or what I have written in this message and the one before it, that person is not me.’ So, you can just carry on defining your beliefs as you go, claiming anything you’ve written before wasn’t you if it doesn’t fit? So you *can’t* be wrong? The Stalinist approach to history – good work. Nice role model. An atheist, at least. A mass murdering delusional dictator, but an atheist.
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Christianity is a relatively new religion, Buddhism, Judaism, Hinduism and atheism are all older than Christianity, and have all managed to live through the vicious and ugly war waged against them by Christianity, the most brutal of all modern religions.
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Further more both Islam, Buddhists and Atheists are gaining ground on Christianity. If Islam continues then it will overtake Christianity sooner rather than later, and we have no signs of it slowing down despite Christian countries best efforts to bomb the shit out of its lands.
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The history records don’t tell the same story as you seem to think they do, since Christianity has become a religion instead of a cult, Christianity has been on the offensive and has yet to stop. Now if you want a resiliant faith then look no further than the Jewish, they have been attacked repeatedly even before the birth of Christianity. Atheists too have suffered greater hardship than the Christians and yet is still strong.
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I don’t believe in hell so threating me with it is the most stupid and pointless thing someone can do. It is like telling me that the toothless monster of the sewers will eat me at 2am, I am not fearful in anyway share or form.
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We have milk (growing) in our University hall fridges with more intelligence than yourself Guido Arbia. You fucking closet case homo!
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NTWHM
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You grow milk? This spells dark days for dairy farmers.
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Shit, I don’t think I locked my door. That toothless sewer monster’s had it in for me for years. I hear he loves sucking up Pastafarians.
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@Guido
if hell has hot chicks and beer, then i’m OK.
p.s. you are still a dumbass
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You seem to bear the misconception that catholics are included under the catagory of Christianity. Many of the religious wars that have occured which gave Christianity a bad name have been the result of the catholic crusades against the muslims. Catholic doctrines and Christian doctrines are certianly not the same. If we are to debate about Christianity, we must let the bible define what a true christian is. There are many verses in the bible which seem to support the protestent view of Christianity over the catholic view.
Now reguarding your statement about the other religions. It is true that many of them will overtake Christianity, but this is because it has been predicted in the bible first. The apostle Paul wrote that there would be a falling away from the truth, that many perverted doctrines would arise, and that people would begin to turn away from religion entirely. And this is what we observe to be true today.
I will ignore many of your other statements, since by looking at them you can easily find their flaws. I anticipate that you will say the same about me, and in doing so, you will have proven my predictive capabilities. If you do not, you have done exactly what I wanted you to do. So either way, no matter what you do, you will lose.
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Now concerning your statement about how God equips people with evidence against and the certian states of mind so that they find their way to hell: The Apostle Paul wrote in Romans 1:20: “For the invisible things since the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse.”
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ok. you are seriously misguided and terribly paranoid. catholicism is just another form of christianity. did you use your predictions with the help of Jesus?
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If you think about it logically, a God of love must be more than one person. So the Flying Sphagetti Monster can’t be a god of love.
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Guido, get a life man and stop worrying about hell. if heaven doesn’t have a stripper factory or beer volcano, then i will give it a pass. besides, my life is already really cool. who gives a fuck about the afterlife. my advice, go get laid.
Ramen
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“I know that some of you will attempt to make me look dumb by impersonating me.”
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You’re kidding me right? I am not sure even the greatest comic could help you look any dumber than the original hate mail could.
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“A person’s intelligence is not to be judged based on a few spelling errors.”
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I do agree here that a persons intelligence can’t be judged based on spelling, but a persons intelligence can be judged on how well they process information and evidence. Now all the evidence points towards the absence of God, and yet you cling on to your 2000 year old superstitions.
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Atheism shows a degree of intellect as they have over come the lies of faith using evidence and logic. You will find that the greater education a person has the more likely s/he will be an atheist. This is not speculation on my part but proven statistical fact.
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My father is not a hugely educated man and was a christian, but as I become more and more into Philosophy he read books I left at home. And eventually come to the conclusion that God did not exist, it is not too late for anyone to realise this.
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But Guido Arbia, the only way you will ever know is by questioning your beliefs and for most it is beyond then intellectually or beyond there bravery (maybe a mix of both).
If you ever want to question those beliefs then I can recommend a few books, that don’t need a educational background to understand.
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Guido Arbia hate to tell you this but it was the Catholics who wrote the bible.
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“If you think about it logically, a God of love must be more than one person. So the Flying Sphagetti Monster can’t be a god of love. ”
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The FSM is infinity itself, therefore it is logical that he is more than one person yes. And therefore he can be a god of love, if he so chooses, whilst simutaniously being the God of infinity amounts of other things, basically everything.
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Hmm, this won’t let me post my comment, and I don’t know why.
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Ah well. Guido, I’ve just disproved God irrefutably.
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Sadly, He seems to have got upset about it and is blocking my comment from appearing.
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Always the same with God. Always sticking His head in where it doesn’t exist.
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Don’t worry too much J, I think I have this one wrapped up.
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But just incase I don’t I shall use a tactic I got from the Christians. Kind of fighting fire with fire watch:-
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Guido Arbia How fucking dare you make fun of my lord and savior the FSM. He made sure that you did not die on the cross you fucking peice of shit. You can’t fucking do that you fucking fuck. Go fuck yourself you fuck!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!!! ANTIFSM!!! YEA, YOUR THE ANTIFSM YOU FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO GO FUCK UP USA YOU FUCKING FUCK. GUIDO BITCHEMSOMS = 666 666 666 PISS WHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!! YOUR GONA BE LEFT WITH FLAT BEAR FOREVER YOU LARGE FUCK. You are an ass crack. You know what an ass crack is bitch? Thats exactly what you look like. Piss whole!!!!! You should go shuve your face up someon’s fucking ass you fucking fuck of a fucking fucker fucky fuck fuck fucker fucky fucker fucky fucker fucky fuck fuck!!!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!! YOU RUIN EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!! YOUR LEADING THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE ACROSS A WOODEN PLANK YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!!! YOU HAVE NO FUCKING RIGHT TO DO THAT YOU FUCKING BASTARD GO FUCK YOUR SELF OR FUCK A TREE OR FUCK YOUR WIFE!!!!!!!! GO FUCK THE FLYING SPHIGETTI MONSTER YOU FUCK!!!!!!
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@ Hawaii Magnum
Pizza is DEFINITELY a food group-just between the bread and cereal group and the meats group (because it has both bread and meat-sometimes.)
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Hellpp:
All this forward and back between you guis and Guido really does me make confused. I has been considering I joining the church of FSM. While me has being schur that the earth is only 5000 yers old, I does not be so schur anniemore. I has thinking that this Karben 14 dating think was invented by the kommunnnisters. Have this thing being proofen to are sientiffick at all?????????????? Me believed so far that the creator put things like fossiels into the soiel just for hasing beeing tricking us. That way he have beein checking us faiths for the last very few thausent years. Guido do make I re-evalluate me beleevings. I trired to understand the Karben 14 dating think very very desporate. Are one of these smart Ph.Ds beeing able to can explayn this for a guy who trirs to bee a sientiffick persen.
Maibee that would enable I to became a Ph.D. ass well some time. Please execuss my englisch but this is not my firest languge and I am being triring to imporove since the last 7 yers. Does I have to imporove any farther if I plans to became a sientiste with a Ph.D. degree. Guido does you think that Karbon 14 dating worked to for finding a loafing patenere in the futter? One of the mean resons for I to learning to imporoving my englisch laguge is that it is easer to kuss. Me likeing really to kuss like Guido do, bekaus in my muther languge it is tecknikally hard to does that. Know about the FSM: Me are sawed Borat last weeckent. I are verry imperessed by his comments about the small brayn of womens. Are there annie linck to FSM being an HIM that has based on this facts? I likeing the idir to of teatsching FSM at schools bekause I doe thinck that soo many sientissts canot be all wronk?? Ising some Ph.D. beeing aple to kan to exeplayn to I how the Klobal warmening and the Hurrikans and the erthquicks and the flees have to doing with the constantelly smaller bekame nummber of Pirtes??? I cans probaply thenn really beliefe in the FSM. I has really not understanding what the Pirtes has to doing with this problems! Plese you giveing me same guidance, so that I kan finding the right religin. Pleese Pleese, I donn’t wan’t to go to Hell! I am fiered just thinking abaut gone to Hell in the futter. Plese hellpp mee soon. Thank you very mutch.
Ralph the sientiste
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@ Guido…
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Does not your own bible say, “Judge not lest yeself be judged.”? You passed your own judgement on us, therefore, has not your own bible given us the right to judge you?
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@whatsinaname?
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Whew! I thought for a moment I might have to enjoy the beer volcano without my favorite munchie.
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BTW…I picked up a cool FSM t-shirt in Second Life, and now proudly strut my stuff while levitating my Pasterfarian philosophy.
May the noodle be ever in sight of the stripper factory.
Aloha
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@ Guido:
“Maybe you aren’t aware of this, but your belief in the Flying Sphagetti Monster is not in any way a single bit of a threat towards Christianity.â€â€”So why are you still complaining about it?
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“History records that the gospel of Christ has been attacked for centuries, yet it has still stood strongâ€â€”Good for you, pat yourself on the back. Then realize that Judaism, for one, is both older and has suffered a heck of a lot more, and is still around. Buddhism is also extremely old. Christianity actually isn’t that old in comparison.
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“those types of morons do not deserve to be in heaven.â€â€”Who are you to decide that? Isn’t that GOD’S job? Beware, Guido, the deadliest of all sins is pride.
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“God has chosen fools as his children for a reason, and that is to make those who appear wise into complete idiots.â€â€¦â€¦huh?
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“Why should a loving God force heaven upon anyone?â€â€”Why should a loving god condemn—or even CREATE—hell in the first place, if he’s so loving?
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“You seem to bear the misconception that catholics are included under the catagory of Christianity.‖….Uh…they kinda are. They believe in Christ, don’t they? Jeeze, you don’t like non-Christians, you don’t like CHRISTIANS…who DO you like, exactly?
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“The apostle Paul wrote that there would be a falling away from the truth, that many perverted doctrines would arise, and that people would begin to turn away from religion entirely.â€â€”Paul…oh, you mean the murdering guy who hated women? Yeah, I’m really gonna listen to a word he has to say. And ‘perverted doctrines’? If anything, Christianity is the perversion, since they took the already-there Jewish Bible and messed it up even more then it already was.
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“I will ignore many of your other statements, since by looking at them you can easily find their flawsâ€â€”No, you’ll ignore the statements because you have no argument for them. Sad, really.
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“The Apostle Paul wrote in Romansâ€â€”My great-aunt Edna said….no one with half a brain cares what Paul had to say. Just because he wrote it doesn’t mean it’s true.
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Please go worry about eternal damnation somewhere else, please and thank you, us heathens are doing quite fine on our own.
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RAmen, gill!
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Oh, and Guido, we aren’t making fun of your Jesus (he was real), we are poking fun at your god (He’s not real).
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@Guido:
Christianity = Catholic Church + Eastern Orthodoxy + Protestantism
All Catholics are Christians, but not all Christians are Catholics. I can make a Venn diagram for you if it’s not beneath your intellect.
As many phrases in the Bible support Protestantism, just as many support Catholicism. Especially when the Catholic Church in the early days suppressed a lot of gnostic texts and epistles deviating from the linear vision of the Church’s founding fathers. Funny, huh?
There’s been some magnificent Christian-on-Christian bloodshed completely unrelated to the Crusades that has tainted my opinion of Christianity: modern-day-until-last-year-approximately Northern Ireland and Tudor England spring immediately to mind.
I find it abstractly amusing how Christians so easily turn on each other and always find a “lesser” group or person in their own ranks to vilify when it suits their needs, c.f. Ted Haggard and “the Catholics”, despite giving lip service to unconditional acceptance as a major tenet of the religion. You’ve come a long way from those public lion maulings in the Coliseum, baby.
You don’t see the Pastafarians breaking rank and calling each other out except when it comes to arm-wrestling contests or who can drink the most rum, now do you? And even then it is only as an exercise to further glorify The Most Magnificent Tastiness the FSM and bask in the glory of his all-encompassing marinara aura while rejoicing in the companionship and good cheer of those of like mind and spirit.
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Don’t forget Anglicans! We are neither protestant, nor catholic.
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TRIX– Thanks!
For the record, I have no great-aunt Edna. But it seemed to fit anyway.
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Guido must be an evangelical.
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true, guido is just another evangelical dumbass that feels its his god given right to be stupid
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I’d just like to nominate Guido as a representative of the red-necked, ignorant incredibly hostile, confused about his sexuality morons that have been screaming ‘Of course i can, God said so!’ While raping, defiling, shooting, molesting destroying and invading anyone else who hasn’t shut down their independant thought processes.
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I wanted to leave a longer comment, because this thread has been one of the funniest things I have ever read, but my gay male prostitute with my meth has just come to my door, and we need to discuss my next sermon on the evil of gays and drug users to the rest of God’s chosen people.
Long Live FSM!
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Now Guido, don’t go getting your panties in a bunch.
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Now, take it easy on Guido. After all, he did apologized for his initial profanity laced comments, so I give him credit for that. If only he could keep his idea of god off the board and go pray with himself.
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I really hope his anger hasnt turned him off pasta.
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Hi TRIX,
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Ooh, interesting! Feel like I’m about to learn something…
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Anglicans are neither Protestant nor Catholic? Do you mean ‘it’s sort of in the middle’? I’d like to get a handle on this one properly!
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Basically, I thought that Anglicanism fell within Protestantism, in accepting scriptural authority as its basis and chucking out all the ‘well, we just made this bit up for a laugh (and to make money)’ stuff that Catholicism has. But, that it also borrows some of its organisational structures and trappings from Catholicism, having evolved in a country (England) that had officially embraced Protestantism, but that had a population born and bred on Catholicism.
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So, you’ve got the Anglo Catholic branch, which is still Protestant at heart but borrows heavily from Catholicism in practice, and then the low-church, which sticks more closely to biblical authority alone and rather resembles methodism and other strictly protestant churches.
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That basically makes Anglicanism a form of Protestantism, but wearing some of Catholicism’s clothes. Is this wrong?
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@ Guido,
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‘I anticipate that you will say the same about me, and in doing so, you will have proven my predictive capabilities.’
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And I, sadly, predict that nothing we say will ever convince you, irrespective of all the clear evidence and reason in the world. I hope I’m wrong, I really do. But, if not, we’re evens in terms of Predictive Capabilities.
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@ Guido,
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‘The Apostle Paul wrote in Romans 1:20:[etc]‘
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Well, of course he did, Guido. That’s not *evidence*. That’s just the author *telling* us to believe. The only thing it demonstrates is that the author wants us to agree with him. Huge surprise there. On the other hand, modern scientically-derived books actually show us *why* something is true, by pointing us to the evidence. Without the books, the things they refer to would still exist. We could go and find them ourselves with a bit of effort – that’s what the scientists do, after all. Take the bible away, though, and how would anyone ever find god? There’s nothing. Nothing.
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@ Guido,
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‘If you think about it logically, a God of love must be more than one person.’
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Why?
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Quick extra point. Go to this page:
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http://whywontgodhealamputees.com/god1.htm
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Read the story, which is an account of recent, real life events. See if you can spot the ‘God of love’.
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awwww this is awesome cant believe i stumbled across this……………people really need to lighten up and get a fucking grip …who knows there may actually be a flying spaghetti monster up in space watching and waiting and judging all those scary creationists …hahahhahahahahah
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@ Hawaii Magnum
Rest assured that there will be plenty of pizza to go with the beer volcanos…after all, pizza goes hand in hand with pasta (the whole sauce thing.)
I just got myself a shirt, too, but waiting for it to ship :(
Mahalo!
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@lyno
‘who knows there may actually be a flying spaghetti monster up in space watching and waiting and judging all those scary creationists’
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There is. His Noodliness has many followers on many planets and is omnipresent throughout the universe.
RAmen
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Hmmmm I think the chappie must be a deranged Boche or something like that.
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I forgot to mention that I have a new shirt.
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and a rather excellent pair of socks from Himleys of Worthington.
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They do cravats as well.
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In blue.
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This is not about your opinion. This is about truth.
You cannot determine why a baby is born speaking about God and being back before anyone ever says anything about God to her. You cannot jump to conclusions of why miracles, so many miracles happened around her that even the priests are amazed. No, you can’t. So those who go around pretending to be know it alls, just who gave you the go ahead to think so?
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Yeah you tell ‘em. Bleedin’ waverers.
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As far as Satanists or atheists go, let’s see how sane they are by acting like anyone else is not. NO, you are cracked.
I am not happy and you act like you’ve done nothing wrong?
Ok, you are imbecilic. You are illogical. You are not even concerned with what makes believers so devoted to Christ.
SO the guy told you off, You do it all the damn time. Hear me? I said damn, that is right. Cause you are acting like you have all the answers. Get a clue and by the way, not everyone thinks like you either. If you saw me praying and saying God heal my lungs Amen and then immediately two handfuls of black goo poured out of my mouth. You might think twice about healing powers of God.
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So what is your point? You keep harping on there is no God yet there are enough believers to say there is a God. Me, for one will never change my mind. Satanists have beaten me, mistreated me, stolen from me, hurt me over and over with evil comments. Why should I like them? They are not nice.
NOT AT ALL> so if I act defensive, I am not letting them hurt me again. I am warning you who did this to me back in school, it will not happen again. Next time, you try that,
you will be sorry.
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It’s excellent, this floating about in cyberspace with my cloak of invisibility and a meat and potato pie.
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Tell Satan to stop victimizing believers, and while you are at it, stop being so assinine.
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wooo
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Truth be told. Oh yes, I swear to God, I know who God is.
I know the truth too. I was born telling my mother that God sent me back. Were you? NO. Are you an expert on dying and reincarnation? No. Are you around those who pray to God and prove he is listening? No. Are you even aware there are those who are in a circle of prayer warriors who know that Mary is back? No. Are you even going to stop making accusations and slandering my good name on here with your ridciculous assumptions? You better.
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Wow. I just love how religious Zealots are so eloquent in their arguments, expressing their points intelligently with facts. Not to mention how polite they are.
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Yes but does Santa have piles? Answer that smarty pants!
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BLR,
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Lay off Satan. Let’s remember who wrote the book about him, God. Taking the Bible’s account of Satan is like claiming you understand Americans because you watch Al Jazeera. Wait, did I just equate Satan with the US?
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Anyway, don’t discount Satan until you get to know him. Invite him over for a BBQ, Saturday night poker, or your favorite nephew’s birthday. Personally, I hung out with Satan last Monday. We had some beers and caught the game on TV. He’s a decent guy, but he did bogart the cheetos.
.
OEJ
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“I know the truth too. I was born telling my mother that God sent me back. Were you? NO. Are you an expert on dying and reincarnation? No. Are you around those who pray to God and prove he is listening? No.”
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True. The thing is, *you* aren’t either. But you reminded me that I haven’t been listening to my Madonna album for quite a long time. Thanks Fatima!
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I like Satan, too, although I don’t think he is an American. It is that big, long tail that gets in the way at parties, though, that makes him a less than desirable guest. And, women (and some men) don’t like him as a lover because his come is ice cold. Other than that, he is pretty swell.
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A large number of believers does not a truth make. As you can see by the great numbers that sign up to crew this great galleon of the pastafarian truth.
Many babies are indoctrinated to believe in non-existant truths (of many religions) from the day that they are born.
RAmen
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Sorry, but this is all utter bollocks and I’m off to bed.
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Satan’s not so bad, the christians just want to give him a bad name because he doesn’t believe in them.
RAmen
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In a minute.
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I’m an Atheist and I don’t judge people on the they’re beliefs alone, I prefer to judge on actions and fundamentalist groups of religions tend to more often than not act in an irrational sometimes dangerous way, just look at the ID movement, all it really is is an attempt to convert the whole of the USA to Christianity forcibly.
If they honestly want to be taken seriously they have to start giving REAL evidence, twisting quotes, using antiquated fallen theorys and blatant lies dont count as evidence.
About Satan, I found this interesting little site with infinately more credability than Creation Science:- http://www.bushisantichrist.com/
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that bushisantichrist site is rather cool, huh? i’d be scared f i didn’t think the antichrist was just another alarmist bullshit faerie-tale.
and BLR id still trying to tell us all that she’s the reincarnation of the Virgin Mary, protected by her elite circle of “prayer warriors”? wow. i though scientology was wierd. this woman should be in an asylum.
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Maybe she is an outpatient?
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the problem is that if what she says is true, then you have to take into account the teams of evil demon-assassins sent from Hell to kill her before she can give birth to the second coming. and the dark sorcerers who want to sacrifice her blood to their evil, ancient gods in exchange for power and immortality. and while we’re into all this religio-conspiracy crap, let’s throw some vampires in there. and werewolves. hell, why not faeries as well, since they show up in just as many mythologies.
you see, if religions were telling the truth, there would be so many possibilities for a more interesting world. a world probably something like a blend between Underworld, Constantine and The Crow, but more interesting nonetheless.
i’ll stop embarassing myself with my fondness for cheesey supernatural action-flicks now.
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BLR says…”Ok, you are imbecilic. You are illogical.”
…..Anyone else think that’s rather funny, coming from her?
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Bring back the faeries!
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And the winged dragons.
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Actually, Gill, I find just about EVERYTHING BLR says rather funny.
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Dont you think your being rather harsh? As an unbias observer i think you should loosen up and alow other people to have there say. So what if they belive something different to you? Why is it more probable that the univerce was created by ‘God’ than by ‘a giant sphigetti monster’? Its so judgmental of you to sentence people to eternal damnation for voicing there opinion. And even if you do feel that strongly about something its not acceptable to talk to anyone like that, all they did was highlight the irony of the situation.
You say ‘fuck’ alot. It doesnt reflect well on Christianity.
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Looks as though ‘Well im Interested’ has maybe sent his/her message to the wrong site.
Loosen up and allow other people to have their say??? That’s what its all about.
More likely the world was created by the FSM instead of God.
Who says anyone can sentence people to eternal damnation? – Whatever that might be!
And why not acceptable?
And where’s the fucking irony?
Does it all reflect well on the FSM?
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Princess M– A very good point.
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hmmmm……bad grammar, crap spelling, lots of swearing……WAIT and the suggestion that our religion is a anti-christ satanic type of cult.
Don’t see that in hate mail everyday.
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-chapter 5 is done.
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“Judge not lest yeself be judged?”
Amen
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If you turn on that thing that reads text and use it on the first post it’s really funny.
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It’s like stephen hawkins having a hissy-fit.
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Typical good christian boy, this Guido Arbia fellow. It’s what we’ve come to expect. A foul-mouthed slack-jaw worried about other fine christians being led into hell. Go play in the street.
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Must be speleng n gramur arnt taught in sundae skool?
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Are all christians this good at writing complaints?
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Most of them are. Sometimes, when the hate mail is slow, we write christian messages to each other. Like this “U fu*king stoopid assses will burn in hell u fu*king faggots cuz u r sooo stoopid HAHAHAHA LOL. i fu*ked ur stoopid spgheti moster n kiled it cuz it wuz a stoopid fagot to. HAHAHAHAH LOL!!!!!!!!!!” Once in a while we get one who can spell, and who can put up a least a little fight. They don’t stick around either. We need a good christian who can debate. Not an easy thing to find.
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I really need to know if all these nasty responses to Bobby’s original proposition (ID as Idealogy, not Science) is bona fide or fabricated? If actual, it’s disturbing, if fake, puts us in a awkward position of responding to nothing actually…
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BLR
“….so if I act defensive, I am not letting them hurt me again. I am warning you who did this to me back in school, it will not happen again….”
A posting like this does not imply coherence of thought. It implies that you are a VERY troubled teenager and you should be seeking help rather than waving threats at random personalities on the internet. None of us here did anything to you back in school, so I’m sure I’m not the only one here confused about that statement. By saying you need help, I’m not trying to insult you. I’m a medical professional offering you an honest assessment. Please get yourself some help.
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BLR
“….Get a clue and by the way, not everyone thinks like you either….”
I think you’re yet another person who’s simply sending in hate mail without reading anything else on the site, INCLUDING THE OPEN LETTER THAT PRETTY MUCH EXPLAINS THE ENTIRE THING IN TERMS ANYONE SHOULD BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND.
Let me help you out by summing this up. FSM was created to make a point to school board officials who attempted to disguise religion as science and teach it as fact in public classrooms. We are honestly very good people and, like your own parents, we don’t want moral codes and values we disagree with forced on our children when and where they are most vulnerable. Can you understand that? If you can, at least we can say we agree on one thing and that’s where civil discussion between opposing viewpoints can begin. Dig it?
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BLR Wrote,
“….You cannot determine why a baby is born speaking about God and being back before anyone ever says anything about God to her….”
1. Baby’s are not born speaking anything at all. They generally cry, then coo, then learn one or two words, then simple sentences, etc. That’s the normal progression of human speech patterns. Small children will generally repeat anything and everything they hear, it’s a very normal part of expanding the vocabulary and learning to communicate. This is basic human growth and development I’m talking about.
2. Based on the comments you’ve written and the type of environment you were more than likely raised in, I find it very hard to believe that no one spoke to you about religion. It is far more plausible that everyone in your community has been pouring liquid christianity (available over the counter in most midwestern states) into your ears since you were in the womb.
Pfizer is still working on liquid Pastafarianism, so don’t be alarmed.
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Guido wrote,
“….It seems that you are judging my intelligence based on your displeasure with my writing style and my alledged crappy spelling….”
Actually we’re judging your intelligence based on the CONTENT of that post, which was disgusting and ignorant, as well as the spelling.
What I think has happened, based on the original message is that the poster was an angry teenage fundamentalist venting at us. He then got frustrated by his own ignorance and fetched his father or priest to help him out. Anyone else see how convenient that is?
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i am extremely embarrassed to admit that i too follow jesus after reading jesus; comments. its people like him that might make some of you not like jesus even more. i am sorry for that.
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Wait wait wait…Guido has a valid point:
John 5:21-And God did say “Go forth, and be a total moron in my name.”
And what’s all this about Jesus? Joshus Christ is where it’s at! Proof? You can actually touch me. Check. And. Mate.
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@theAntibush
I see you have discovered the BLR. BLR considers herself to be re-incarnated Mary!
You’ll find posts from her all over some of the older threads. Click on the hate-mail link for some of the older posts.
RAmen
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im pretty sure that jesus never wanted us to cuss out people and damn them to hell. soooo, i hope you werent serious when you posted that.
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@ Beastly Rich, Oh my! A whole new way to enjoy these rants! How do you turn it on, and what thing are you talking about? I simply must hear this post spoken out loud.
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Wench Niky,
funny thing is, I suspected that’s what she was getting at but I wasn’t sure I was interpreting her gibberish correctly. Thanks for the confirmation. So she’s all of…what, 12?
I’d like to meet one of her…”experts on reincarnation,” since there are no documented cases of provable reincarnation or resurrection in human history except the fairy tale about Jesus. Which is documented not by anyone who was there to witness it, but by someone whom the witness allegedly told about it later, in a book written to proclaim just how cool Jesus is….sure I could totally see why a million people worldwide would believe that, no problem.
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@theAntibush: If you use the “fairy tale” of Jesus as an example, then I must encourage other tales from other religions. They have similar proof. Odin hanging himself on the Yiggrasle tree for 12 days could also work. I’m sure there are a few in the Greco-Roman religions as well.
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oh man, how very like a christian. Really quite funny, the horrible grammer really adds to it. Jesus seems like a pretty mellow dude and im sure he’d probably smack this kid for using the F-bomb more times in a single paragraph than i think i’ve ever even spoken in probably 6 months. seriously, jesus was a cool dude and i doubt he wanted his followers using his name to support their rants/wars/insanity
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@Sacreligous Sea-Dog
‘i doubt he wanted his followers using his name to support their rants/wars/insanity’
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I think you are right there Sea-Dog. In fact there is a very strong rumour going around that jeesus/god want to take their religion back from their followers.
RAmen
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I’m so sorry i only just got round to reading this thread, i’m crying with laughter at this point – it’s fantastic! Guido you’re a true shining light of religious tolerance and fervour, well done dude, however….
“# Guido Arbia Nov 13th, 2006 at 5:46 pm
Now concerning your statement about how God equips people with evidence against and the certian states of mind so that they find their way to hell: The Apostle Paul wrote in Romans 1:20: “For the invisible things since the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse. ..”
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wtf? it’s invisible but if you join our club you can see it? see what? if a single believer had proof i suspect they’d shout about it. this is irrational, nigh on unintelligible garbage.
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“Bobby’s last reply Nov 17th, 2006 at 2:55 pm
So what is your point? You keep harping on there is no God yet there are enough believers to say there is a God. Me, for one will never change my mind.”…
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i’m not convinced this isn’t a spoof, but what the hell… Bob have your read what you wrote? I’ll summarise for you. If enough of us believe it then it’s true. How many exactly? i’m curious how many believer make something true so we can concentrate on some really wacky cool stuff being true… and as for never changing your mind. congratulations, the mind control freaks would be proud of you. so what you’re saying is no matter what proof, up to and including you standing before another deity come death/judgement day etc, you will not alter your ideas. nice going man. you managed to time travel your mind all the way to the dark ages.
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wow, i’m very impressed. that is a lot of curse words for one paragraph. good job.
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You know, there’s no FSMists ranting on the Vatican’s website about how worshiping a God is insulting to His Noodly Appendage. Some people shouldn’t be given a keyboard after drinking coffee.
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Hmm…. Aristotle thinks this is another example of creativity at using fuck.
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Guido should write hate-mail professionally.
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^ hehehe, good one.
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Did anyone else try speaking it out loud and realize how incredibly funny it truly is? Especially if you use a Evangelical accent.
I could hardly finish it I was laughing far too hard.
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“I will simply start by asking Do you truely believe that Mary was a virgin?”
Seriously… unplanned pregnancies.. BEST EXCUSE. “but i swear.. it’s god’s”
yeah alice, i was reading it to my boyfriend on the phone, he thought i was having an asthma attack.
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if “the holy bible” is true, i have proof Satan wrote at least part of it (at least creation)
if your “god” is what it is said to be, he will never have anything to do with the occult, right?
Satan does, the story of “creation” was (according to your believe) at least 6 days before the existence of human beings, and thousands of years before someone wrote them down
how could they have known that, you catholics might say he signed it down to earth, writing something signed to you by some (holy) spirit is called automatic writing, automatic writing is considered the occult, god doesn’t do that, Satan does,
You have been trusting the wrong god,
All hail His Noodly Appendage
RAmen
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it’s a real shame Guido Arbia decided to claim he didn’t write the first comment, but it’s sure still as funny as hello (oh gosh ~ a pun)
Blessed Be
snake
i keep my name in lowercase in honour of the Goddess
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grrrrrrrrr…… that shold have read: funny as hell
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Goodness such anger!!! Does this mean jesus endorses the word “fuck” 78,000,000 times in one hate letter? What a strange religeon…
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Guido is proof of a Supreme Being (of your choice)
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There is no other explanation for his continued existance other than Divine Providence providing a Spirit to sit on his shoulder and whisper in his ear:
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“Breathe in.”
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“Breathe out.”
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“Breathe …”
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Wow. That was amazing! So much stupid, fit into just a small paragraph!
I feel like doing a total “fuck” count, but it would take way too long. But still:
“fucking fuck of a fucking fucker fucky fuck fuck fucker fucky fucker fucky fucker fucky fuck fuck!!!!! FUCK” 16 fucks. Damn!
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Apparently even the crazy fundies can’t handle this guy lol:
http://www.evcforum.net/cgi-bin/dm.cgi?action=msg&f=19&t=391&m=1
…however, the New York Times is shocked by how little he complains off the internet:
http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=990CE0D9123CF93BA1575BC0A963958260&sec=&spon=&pagewanted=1
Truly, a mysterious creature, is Guido Arbia.
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I got 37 “fucks”, if you include “fucky”, “fucking,” and other variations on the word. Wow.
Calm down, man. We’re entitled to our religion, aren’t we?
@Alice, I tried reading it aloud, too. I didn’t get through it.
I have nothing more to say on this post. It’s just a pathetic expression of anger.
PL&P, even to Guido Arbia.
RAmen.
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All those ‘fuck’s but not a single ‘fuckety’. ‘Tis a shame.
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We can be honest and state that the Church of the FSM, is not as much a “mainstream” religion, mainstream in the fact that it is accepted by religious zealots of other religions, but more of a general statement about the institution of religion and the idea of faith. While anyone can hold fast to their faith guns, which supposedly gives them license to bash and insult those who partake in this expression of opinion and free speech, (and freedom of religious expression) protected by the US constitution. People of sterner stuff can learn the purpose of this institution, rather than its dogma, and for themselves internalize it. Its healthy to have religious and spiritual ideals tested and questioned, just as it is for political views to be debated. I will play the Christian game and pose the following question. If God gave us the gift of inference and the desire and means to learn of his beautiful creation, why cannot we experience religious doubts then spiritually grow from them along our path of discovery? My point: grow up, laugh, learn and love. If their a God and your a good person he loves you. If there is not a God, you were a good person and your memory will be loved ( the greatest extent of immortality available). If God exists in the form of a savior Jesus Christ, he would love you for your Christ like action, for it is written, Jesus associated himself with tax collectors and prostitutes. He wasn’t among them in character, but understood them and loved them for who they were. So keep your undeveloped ideas of God to yourself.
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i want you do you want me
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I answer these questions the same day, if another student hasn’t already provided the answer. ,
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However I am concerned about Homer I think he needs to go to the doctirs before his eyes fall out! ,
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