Flying Spaghetti Monster? Hah! More like Flying Stupid Monster! It’s morans like you who give religion a bad name. I stumbled across your site in my wanderings and was ASTOUNDED at the lack of piousness and intelligence. ASTOUNDED. But you will pay for your sinful ways in the afterlife. The one and TRUE god will roast you on a SPIT!.
Flying Spaghetti Monster? Hah! More
Published by Bobby Henderson March 25th, 2006 in Hate Mail (and concerned criticism). 32 Comments
32 Responses to “Flying Spaghetti Monster? Hah! More”
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“Flying Spaghetti Monster? Hah! More like Flying Stupid Monster!”
Burned…
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Lets look at the snippet
>It’s morans like you who give religion a bad name.
followed by
>The one and TRUE god will roast you on a SPIT!.
That has got to be pure comic genius. Religion and tolerance never go hand in hand, and all this hate mail proves it time and time again
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> Religion and tolerance never go hand in hand
sure they do. the flying spaghetti monster loves everyone!
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It’s “morans” like you who give ENGLISH(that thing that comes out your mouth, on occaison.)
a bad name.
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So, he capitalizes astounded, true, and spit, but not god? Talk about pious and reverent…
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It’s morans like you who give christians a bad reputation as spellers.
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It’s morons like you that give HUMANS a reputation for being inanly stupid.
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“The one and TRUE god will roast you on a SPIT!. ”
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So you admit that God is not very belevent?
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Only a ‘moran’ would worship a mean old god like that.
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This person sounds like a church lady. All that moral outrage condescension leaves me ASTOUNDED at the piousness and lack of intelligence. She’ll be sorry when she gets no strippers and beer in the afterlife.
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“It’s morans like you who give religion a bad name. ”
Thank you! :) We can’t do that quite as well as posts like yours does but we do try.
“he one and TRUE god will roast you on a SPIT!.”
Heaven has a spit? I thought god and the devil had demarcation about this sought of thing? I see I still have a lot to learn about this whole religion thing.
Jesus is now god…….jesus has a spit …..the devil is unemployed?
How am I doing?
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Yeah, what’s with god roasting people on a spit? Is he trying to usurp Satan’s position as the most interesting member of the Christian imaginary friend pantheon?
Jesus is supposed to be god, and god’s son, and another guy called the holy spirit. It’s sort of like in our religion where the FSM is also his sacred sauce and holy meatballs. They are separate from him but they are part of him. It’s a mystery, my child.
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Nowtheworldhasmeaning: He loves us as he roasts us on a spit, because he’s all loving. He didn’t want to do it, but we were bad. We made him do it. It hurts him more than it hurts us. Truly
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Gunna need a big spit!
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Actually, this hatemail has made me realise that the FSM should get the builders round to quote for a brick bbq in heaven. Shrimps, sausages, lambofgod chops. Yummy. No Christians, though (they’re a bit stringy and very, very bitter).
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questions
1. why worry about the afterlife when i could just enjoy my life now?
2. why do u give religion such a crappy name?
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I’m afraid i can’t rot in a hellish afterlife and be roasted on a SPIT because, sadly i am not a Christian.
Poor me……….
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“piousness”
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is it possible he means piety?
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or does being a christian somehow give you a supernatural affinity for the Greek letter Pi?
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-chapter 5 is done.
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I think all this is incredibly cool and funny. I’m a very cynical person with a long history of failing to get on with organised religion, and finding a religious website that A) does not take itself seriously and B) probably shouldn’t be taken seriously simply because it is a spectaculrily funny joke, to be a breath of fresh air.
Thankyou, every Pastafarian on the Net. You made this depressive Scotsman smile.
As to the bible-basher who began this thread, I say only:
He died 2000 years ago,
Get over it.
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hey man, don’t make fun of my death. i died for your sins man.
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jk, i don’t know what was so great about the death of jesus. you have sympathy for his death, but it’s not like he was the ‘only’ person to be on the cross
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thanks for your support, calum
RAmen
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Im a christian and obviously believe in God, however i think its good that people are starting to think there are other possible ways that the earth was created! So FSM should keep going! woo
becca xx
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I love parodies of all forms; it’s an amazing world in which we live. My dad often said that it’s differences that make life interesting, and it’s kinda been my personal philosophy since the idea sank into my head.
OK, I take the mickey out of the Christians a lot; that’s for a reason. My elder sister has had verbal abuse and in fact stones flung at her due to rumours that she is a witch, and even now the Vatican still hasn’t apologised for the witch-burnings. Until they do, I reserve the right to dislike them and crack jokes about them.
Pastafarianism, on the other hand, strikes me as what Dad calls ‘good clean fun’ – and a nice spaghetti bolognese is definitely easier to digest than cardboard-flavour biscuits.
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@calum, hairy scotsman
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i see your point on making fun of religions. i make fun of religion all the time and most of what i say is true, yet i am aim it at the the fundamentalists and for the christians and people of other religions with common sense i will say that i respect their view of the world.
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i’m sorry to ask this, but your sister was thought to be a witch? are you referring to the salem witch trials or something that actually happened. i don’t mean to sound like i’m making fun of you (which i’m not for you are a cool guy), but what happened to your sister?
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Did religion have a good name to begin with or something?
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What a horrible attempt at an insult.
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I certainly do love tollerance.
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Remember people, the one true god only roasts us on a spit because he loves us.
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“Hah! More like Flying Stupid Monster!”
Wow! That must have taken a long time to think of!
“God will roast you on a SPIT!”
You sound more like a Satanist to me…
P.S. How can you spell piousness but not moron? “It’s morans like you who give religion a bad name.”
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I didn’t know God had a spit! He must have stolen it from Satan! Is it just me, or have the 2 switched places?
And yeah, it’s “piety” not “piousness”, genius. What a “moran”.
Don’t worry, religion doesn’t need our help to give it a bad name!
PL&P!!
RAmen.
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“The one and TRUE god will roast you on a SPIT!”
may the FSM have pity on this man’s poor soul… but the FSM will certainly not roast anybody on a spit, because FSMism is one of the few religions that tolerates all. For FSM’s sake… this is SO hilarious.
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