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Who made that darn matter? Yah know the one out in space, millions of years ago and slowly over millions of years became molecules, atoms, millions of planets and stars and live on earth?
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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The Flying spaghetti monster made the matter.
We’ve totally covered this.
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Okay, let me see if I’ve got the timeline right
time became molecules -> molecules formed atoms -> atoms became planets -> stars were born -> planets & stars came to live on Earth
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@Just Nick
“The Flying spaghetti monster made the matter.”
I heard, (may just be a rumour), His Noodliness was carrying it around whilst wandering around planning the beer volcano, got a bit loose and dropped it, sending it everywhere?
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Yah, He dropped it alright. Hit us like an explosion, called, oh yeah, THE BIG BANG.
This fool thinks it millions. Ho’ it was BILLIONS of years ago.
Where’s the ‘Idiot-Raid’?
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Who made that darn matter?……..became molecules…….
Electronegativity of elements and gravity?
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FSM is very good at these physical forces. A master in fact.
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?Quantum effects?->Big Bang->energy->subatomic particles->atoms->molecules
You know the rest
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You are all the most retarded bunch of people I’ve of people I have ever seen. You worship a giant wad of meat wrapped in wheat.
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pasta, to be precise
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Why is it that retarded people call everyone who disagrees with them retarded? It makes me snicker.
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We don’t worship a wad of meat wrapped in wheat, we worship the creator of the universe who happens to manifest himself as noodles with two beautiful meat balls.
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@You are all retarded
I suppose that you’ll just stick with the celestial boogy-man. At least our God is cool and digs pirates…who are also cool.
RAmen
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Taken from uncyclopedia.org (see my user link)
Genuflection
The Pastafarian gesture of worship. While mainly a ritualistic practice, this gesture remains the most powerful yet passive means by which the faithful may deflect the evil influence of science and logic. When confronted by a challenger to the faith, a correctly-executed genuflection will weaken the attacker’s resolve to the point that they are obliged to give up their side of the argument and retreat.
HOW TO GENUFLECT:
STEP 1: Bow the head
STEP 2: Close the eyes
STEP 3: Place the palms of the hands firmly over the ears.
STEP 4: Sing “Lalalalalalalala!” in loud monotone until hoarse.
njoi, nonbelievers
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hmm…that’s the same one the xtians use!
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//You are all the most retarded bunch of people I’ve of people I have ever seen. You worship a giant wad of meat wrapped in wheat.//
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You want the Beef Wellington Monster site. This is the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
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Cap’n Annie, paddling desperately toward the present
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@Cap’n Annie
hahahahaha
RAmen
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Friends, please get your theology right. His Noodliness did indeed drop all the matter in the universe when He was planning a beer volcano, but He did it in consequence of absent-mindedly picking a lintball from between His Meatball Cheeks (praise be) with His Noodly Appendage. Also, it was between five and six thousand years ago, not billions. He only makes it LOOK like it was that long ago, to play a joke on us (fossils, geology, etc.). Just trying to set you on the right path, brother Pastafarians. All hail our Lord! Praise His Noodliness! RAmen
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The Flying Spaghetti Monster, of course.
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The big bang was when he got drunk and put a full can of beer into the microwave and it exoploded creating everything.
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We have several options:
-FSM
-Big Bang (these first two could both be true simultaneously)
-God (Judeism and Christianity)
-Allah
-All of those scary looking Hindu gods
-Google (no really it’s a religion)
-You (last-thursday.org)
-Whatever the Buddhists think happened
-The Japanese Shintu spirits
Since the Big Bang has been scientifically proven, it’s pretty obvious that this is the correct theory. However, there is not much theory for how the Big Bang came to pass. Pastafarianism has that covered:
The big bang was when he [the FSM] got drunk and put a full can of beer into the microwave and it exoploded creating everything. -James D King of Pirates
There you have it.
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The other Pastafarian theory about the Big Bang is that the FSM was a little drunk, was carrying the matter around while planning the beer volcano, he tripped, and it went everywhere.
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