fsm missionaries
Published by Bobby Henderson December 11th, 2003 in General FSM news and Spread the Word. 64 Comments
64 Responses to “fsm missionaries”
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An elaborate spoof on Intelligent Design, The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is neither too elaborate nor too spoofy to succeed in nailing the fallacies of ID. It's even wackier than Jonathan Swift's suggestion that the Irish eat their children as a way to keep them from being a burden, and it may offend just as many people, but Henderson, described elsewhere as a 25-year-old "out-of-work physics major," puts satire to the same serious use that Swift did. Oh, yes, it is very funny. -- Scientific American
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Nice rapier!
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Nice! With such lurvely young missionary wenches as these, FSM global domination is surely emmient. Keep up the good work ladies! See you at the Beer Volcano. Arrrgh!
RAmen
MJK, Orthodox Pastafarian
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Well FSM Missionaries are definitly better looking than the Christian variety. Yet another reason for FSM being superior.
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Arrggghhh. These Wenches make my wooden leg stand up strait.
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Wow, those chicks (i mean pirates) are fucking hot. it would be cool to get their numbers.
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i’m a 17 year old straight boy looking for girls that are pastafarian. now this looks like a good deal.
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Hmmm, I’d love some preaching from them…Come to slovakia…;-)
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Who’d have thought Long John Silver could breed with such class?
RAmen indeed!
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I’d much prefer these Missionaries to the two Mormon Missionaries that turned up at my door the other week or the Alpha Course ones who pushed their leaflet through my door when I didn’t hear the doorbell, pity about that I could have done with a laugh and pulling Christians believes to pieces is always fun. Ain’t I a stinker.
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With missionaries that look like that we are gonna get a lot more followers.
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Tottaly gonna become a missionary now :D
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I’ve got a missionary position for em if they’re looking for work.
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(C’mon it was coming eventually, someone had to get it out of the way!)
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Lord forgive me!
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Let’s compare these with those silly christian missionaries:
long, flowing hair>bald, revealing pirate garb>old brown robes, swords>smelly scrolls. Summary? Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster>Christianity. RAmen.
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@ Nick the Bible Thumper.
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Glad you broke first!
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@Nick the Bible Thumper
‘(C’mon it was coming eventually, someone had to get it out of the way!)’
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Why doesn’t it surprise me, that it was a christian fundie who ‘had to get it out of the way’
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Can I be both Pirate and Ninja at the same time carrying lolalties with niether in the never-ending epic battle.
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Avast! Such fine wenches indeed. FSM missionaries own! Arrrr….
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How could anyone resist being converted by such lovely wenches?
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I wonder if either of them would like to pat my parrot???
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I wonder if both of them would like to pat my parrot???
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Yeah, people will definalty be more open to them than the Jahova’s witnesses.^_^
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@nick the bible humper
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yea, i’m sure a bunch of hot chicks like that would ever support you. NOT!
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Sign me up for some proselytizing!
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@jesus christ Dec 12th, 2006 at 5:57 pm
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@nick the bible humper
‘yea, i’m sure a bunch of hot chicks like that would ever support you. NOT!’
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We’ll have him back into our fold in no time jesus. ;)
There is just no competition!
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Two fine examples of the proof and truth of Pastafarianism. I believe!
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@Ted Linguini: Now you must understand that FSM is truely wise for making that cold seaspray off the bow of the ship.
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@Wench Nikkie
“Why doesn’t it surprise me, that it was a christian fundie who ‘had to get it out of the way?”
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Ohhh Just you wait. I’m researching Christian missionary opportunities in the land down under as we speak.
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If all works out according to my plan, I’ll convert you the hard way!
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@nick the bible thumper
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OH SHIT, EVERYBODY RUN, HE’S GOING TO CONVERT US. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. dude, is this really what you like to do for fun, convert people. wow.
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As I gaze at these delightful missionaries that his supreme noodleyness in his infinate wisdom has created, I’m wondering what is the church of the FSM position on polygamy? Might I marry both of these missionaries FSM willing? If not can I still have multiple girlfriends, strippers and camp followers.
RAmen
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Jesus christ, jesus christ, (get it? :p) just chill the FSM out will you?
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He’s on our side…
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@nick the bible thumper
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ok man, i am literally really sorry. i thought you were at first an evangelical. i take back everything i said for i thought you were a fundy at first. i guess that even the great lord jesus is capable of fucking up.
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now since i know you’re a good guy. which chick do you want. i want the one on the left.
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@jingles
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thanks for pointing that out. i made a mistake. i should never have engaged in friendly fire.
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@Jesus Christ
“yea, i’m sure a bunch of hot chicks like that would ever support you. NOT!”
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The infinite glory of the lord Jesus Christ which I am now basking in, seems to have clouded the memories of my time as a hedonist pastafarian.
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Based on the vague recollections I do have, I seem to recall that pastafarians have an acute sense of humor.
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Aditionally, based on my knowledge of humor, I seem to recall that “Not” jokes lie somewhere near the bottom of the barrel. Just above “Take my wife, Please”, and just below Pollock jokes.
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Your continued displays of “humor deficit disorder” lead me to believe that you are a fundamentalist Christian, posing as a pastafarian.
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In which case I say, “Thank You”!
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Its all good man! I wanted the one on the right anyway.
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But seriously, “Not” jokes are completely unsanctioned forms of humor according to the FSM.
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wtf. wtf. wtf.
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ok, i am literally confused. first jingles tells me that this guy is on our side. is he just joking, or is he really a bible thumper. i am so fucking confused right now. if god were really real, he would really give me an answer right now,
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how am i a fundamentalist christian if i bash intelligent design all the time?
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Oh FSM, this whole JC v the Bible Thumper thing just goes on and on.
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I think we are all forgetting the most important things here;
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Aussies mowed the poms in the Ashes (we came back from as close as an impossible position to win as is possible to still win from [try saying that 20 times really quickly])
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Also, we have two luverly wenches out spreading the good word. Fingers crossed they decide to ravage my neck of the woods sometime soon.
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Look, its likely he just didnt see your latest post.
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Did I mention that I want ‘em both…
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Now, please, back to the booze, sport and ladies!
(apologies for the triple post)
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@nick the bible thumper
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alright, it’s all good. sorry man, i didn’t understand your message before. let’s put all of this behind us, shall we.
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@jingles
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don’t worry, there’s no problem anymore. i was just misinformed
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@Jingles
An Aussie and a cricket fan…I just knew that you were a good egg noodle…and Capt’n Sick agrees.
RAmen
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It gets difiicult when we keep adding layers of satire upon layers of satire upon layers of satire.
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Particularly when we consider that theres 300 or so posts around here a day, and the fact that this board is organized in the most assfuck possible way.
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So far Nikkiee is the only one diligent enough to review them all and keep up every single day. I still don’t understand how Nikkiee was temporarily a ghost, nor how Marc lost his first oar.
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But JC, you have to admit that you reacted to my posts in the same Knee-jerk way that the fundies do to FSM in general.
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I can’t fault you for this, but I do think that you should be forced to watch no less than 3 hours of “The Kids in the Hall”, as pennance.
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@Nick the Bible Thumper
‘So far Nikkiee is the only one diligent enough to review them all and keep up every single day.’
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I wouldn’t exactly call it diligence Nick. More like a fear of missing something good, like some clever wise-arsery.
RAmen
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Hot hot hot!
Although this leaves me confused about the Pirates and temperature thing. These hearty beauties seem to contradict the graph.
I’ll study it again.
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@nick the bible thumper
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i know my reactions were bad and you definitly have the right to say i’m stupid for saying them. yes, i did react to your posts bad. as i said before, it’s because i thought you literally were a fundy. i now know that i misread the comments. as i said before, lets put all this behind us.
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however, if a ‘real’ fundy does come onto our sight, don’t expect me to play nice with them. i will show the fundies no mercy.
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i meant site, not sight
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Wow JC and Nick, you two almost brought about the “schism” foretold by Archbishop Tagliatelle on the “FSM Nativity” thread. I didn’t think it would happen so soon…..
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:)
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@ Wench Nikkie- I’ve been wondering for some time, how do you manage to post so much?! What do you do all day? I know from your posts you have a job, but what kind of job is it that allows you to spend so much time on the net?
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test
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test2
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L’TUAE_42 Dec 13th, 2006 at 2:35 pm
@ Wench Nikkie- I’ve been wondering for some time, how do you manage to post so much?! What do you do all day? I know from your posts you have a job, but what kind of job is it that allows you to spend so much time on the net?
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Now that is funy!
Ramen
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49 Responses to ,Äúfsm
missionaries,Äù
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@Bill
I abused the most recent thread to try to embed a link to an exrternal gif and get a bigger font size. Didn’t work. Have you tried that ever? In my attempt anything after the ‘make font bigger’ insert was left out?
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@DPG
So, I couldn’t get all of the stuff off the other threads…
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What do I win if I send an email to notchemung@gmail.com?
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@DutchpastaGuy
My two experiments to make a larger font didn’t work. I’ll try another approach
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@DutchpastaGuy
I’ve seen people insert gifs or jpgs. It should be possible. That would jazz things up. No clue. Let you know if I figure out anything.
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another test, sorry please disregard
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@Batman
It’s an invitation to join the FSM Yahoo group. That has an email list you can subscribe too if you want. People feel free to say things there they might not post in the threads. There is also our pictures collection (that you can add to if you like etc).
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Batman Feb 24th, 2007 at 7:45 pm
@DPG
So, I couldn’t get all of the stuff off the other threads…
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What do I win if I send an email to notchemung@gmail.com?
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You win nothing, it’s over your head I’m afraid.
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@Bill
I tried the larger font through the plain vanilla FONT SIZE=”+2″
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Oh crap, now everything after that bit of coding disappeared. Ok, I also asked about the pictures you had seen being inserted. Was that here on the FSM threads?
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Testing testing
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were can you get that rapier?
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man they are soooooooooooo hot
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